Hunt. Hunt.
Post by Thread Pirate Roberts on Oct 13, 2007 22:58:36 GMT -5
Welcome back my friends to the show that never ends we're so glad you could attend, step inside step inside.
Hello again all and welcome to a new edition of The Pirates Cove!
This week our guest is Wrestlecraps resident gigilo humanoid!
We find humanoid at his local watering hole attending a Speed Dating event, humanoid has his list of potential dates and the questions from us.
Let's watch and listen to what happens as he answers both our questions and thiers.
1. What makes you so spongeworthy?
Its like all the stars have aligned, and all the work I have put into studying women and relationships has paid off all at the same time. I am starting to think I have done too good a job of making myself appealing, and moved beyond spongeworthy. What, you ask is beyond spongeworthy? When women don't want to use protection... That's smurfing scary dude.
2. Is there anything you won't do?
I will never wear a belt and shoes that don't match, that makes me want to stab people. I also don't lie, and I don't put up with bullies.
* at this point humanoid hands the lady at the table a note excuses himself from the table and heads for the restroom. 1 minute later the lady follows.
(20 mins later)
3. Is there anyone you won't do?
Haha, my initial reaction is: "no one but my ex wife", but truthfully my standards are higher than ever, they are just based more on personality than looks.
*next table
4. Where did you get that haircut?
Well, I have been going to the same place for 7 or 8 years now, but this last time I went to a different place, as I "befriended" the owner, and she practically begged me to let her do my hair.
She did a pretty good job, and it was pretty hard to beat the price, but I'm still going back to my usual girl.
5. Why must the Thread Pirates only do good?
Because the original concept was to kibosh some of the negativity that creeps into controversial threads, and protect the fine, upstanding wrestlecrap community from the occasional troll, or misguided poster. The last thing I want is for the Thread Pirates to be seen as a bunch of jerks who take over every thread they post in.
* humanoid once again hands the new woman a note excuses himself while the woman immediatly follows.
(25 mins later)
6. Do you think we should just Carve Cornfed up for Bacon?
I enjoy bacon very much, however Cornfed is my friend, and much like myself, he is far too thin to make for good eating. If we were to clone him, and raise the clones in a confined environment and force feed them to be fat and tender, I would be all for it.
* next table
7. What are you drinking?
Alexander Keiths India Pale Ale. It is the beer that got me into drinking beer, so I owe it a lot.
* humanoid once again hands the new woman a note excuses himself while the woman immediatly follows.
(30 mins later)
8. Will you share?
Absolutely, what's mine is yours.
9. How many women are you currently "Dating"?
Your question confuses me. If you mean dating dating, I am currently spending time getting to know about 9 or 10 different women. If your quotation marks are meant to indicate penetration, I am a gentleman and will only say that I no longer forget what it feels like.
10. Will you share?
Absolutely, what's mine is yours.
* serious question alert
1. Where do you hope to be in 10 years?
In 10 years I will be nervously guarding my 13 year old daughter with some sort of dangerous super weapon. I will also have a vast real estate empire, and be the happiest man on the planet.
2. Who do you consider true friends?
Well, as strange as it may sound, I am closer to several people here, than I am to anyone in my offline life. I have a small group of friends that I have known since I was 11 or 12, who I haven't been overly close too since I got married. They are the type of friends that I could start hanging out with tomorrow, and it would be like nothing changed. However, the fact that my wife has been gone for almost 2 months and I haven't contacted any of them may be saying something.
3. What is your best moment?
This is a tough one because I look for the best in every moment. If pressured I would say that being the first one to hold my daughter, and having her instantly stop crying and stare at me when I talked to her for the first time is number one. However this may change in the very near future, as I am in the process of setting up a date with a young lady who competes in those fitness competitions.
4. How is the Daughter?
She gets cuter, smarter, and funnier every day. The things she says never fail to amaze me. She is also a tremendous pain in the ass sometimes.
5. How do you want to be remembered?
I want to be remembered as a nice guy who made everyone around him feel better. As corny as it may be, I came across this somewhere and it has always stuck with me.
Wherever I go,
everyone is a little bit safer because I am there.
Wherever I am,
anyone in need has a friend.
Whenever I return home,
everyone is happy I am there.
When the interview concludes humanoid stands and shakes our hands as he snaps his finger, immediatly the 3 women he met today stand by his side and they proceed to walk out the door.
Until next time when we will have another guest.
Remember at the Pirates Cove we always get the Booty!
We here at the Cove encourage and appreciate all Comments and Feedback from our readers.
Hello again all and welcome to a new edition of The Pirates Cove!
This week our guest is Wrestlecraps resident gigilo humanoid!
We find humanoid at his local watering hole attending a Speed Dating event, humanoid has his list of potential dates and the questions from us.
Let's watch and listen to what happens as he answers both our questions and thiers.
1. What makes you so spongeworthy?
Its like all the stars have aligned, and all the work I have put into studying women and relationships has paid off all at the same time. I am starting to think I have done too good a job of making myself appealing, and moved beyond spongeworthy. What, you ask is beyond spongeworthy? When women don't want to use protection... That's smurfing scary dude.
2. Is there anything you won't do?
I will never wear a belt and shoes that don't match, that makes me want to stab people. I also don't lie, and I don't put up with bullies.
* at this point humanoid hands the lady at the table a note excuses himself from the table and heads for the restroom. 1 minute later the lady follows.
(20 mins later)
3. Is there anyone you won't do?
Haha, my initial reaction is: "no one but my ex wife", but truthfully my standards are higher than ever, they are just based more on personality than looks.
*next table
4. Where did you get that haircut?
Well, I have been going to the same place for 7 or 8 years now, but this last time I went to a different place, as I "befriended" the owner, and she practically begged me to let her do my hair.
She did a pretty good job, and it was pretty hard to beat the price, but I'm still going back to my usual girl.
5. Why must the Thread Pirates only do good?
Because the original concept was to kibosh some of the negativity that creeps into controversial threads, and protect the fine, upstanding wrestlecrap community from the occasional troll, or misguided poster. The last thing I want is for the Thread Pirates to be seen as a bunch of jerks who take over every thread they post in.
* humanoid once again hands the new woman a note excuses himself while the woman immediatly follows.
(25 mins later)
6. Do you think we should just Carve Cornfed up for Bacon?
I enjoy bacon very much, however Cornfed is my friend, and much like myself, he is far too thin to make for good eating. If we were to clone him, and raise the clones in a confined environment and force feed them to be fat and tender, I would be all for it.
* next table
7. What are you drinking?
Alexander Keiths India Pale Ale. It is the beer that got me into drinking beer, so I owe it a lot.
* humanoid once again hands the new woman a note excuses himself while the woman immediatly follows.
(30 mins later)
8. Will you share?
Absolutely, what's mine is yours.
9. How many women are you currently "Dating"?
Your question confuses me. If you mean dating dating, I am currently spending time getting to know about 9 or 10 different women. If your quotation marks are meant to indicate penetration, I am a gentleman and will only say that I no longer forget what it feels like.
10. Will you share?
Absolutely, what's mine is yours.
* serious question alert
1. Where do you hope to be in 10 years?
In 10 years I will be nervously guarding my 13 year old daughter with some sort of dangerous super weapon. I will also have a vast real estate empire, and be the happiest man on the planet.
2. Who do you consider true friends?
Well, as strange as it may sound, I am closer to several people here, than I am to anyone in my offline life. I have a small group of friends that I have known since I was 11 or 12, who I haven't been overly close too since I got married. They are the type of friends that I could start hanging out with tomorrow, and it would be like nothing changed. However, the fact that my wife has been gone for almost 2 months and I haven't contacted any of them may be saying something.
3. What is your best moment?
This is a tough one because I look for the best in every moment. If pressured I would say that being the first one to hold my daughter, and having her instantly stop crying and stare at me when I talked to her for the first time is number one. However this may change in the very near future, as I am in the process of setting up a date with a young lady who competes in those fitness competitions.
4. How is the Daughter?
She gets cuter, smarter, and funnier every day. The things she says never fail to amaze me. She is also a tremendous pain in the ass sometimes.
5. How do you want to be remembered?
I want to be remembered as a nice guy who made everyone around him feel better. As corny as it may be, I came across this somewhere and it has always stuck with me.
Wherever I go,
everyone is a little bit safer because I am there.
Wherever I am,
anyone in need has a friend.
Whenever I return home,
everyone is happy I am there.
When the interview concludes humanoid stands and shakes our hands as he snaps his finger, immediatly the 3 women he met today stand by his side and they proceed to walk out the door.
Until next time when we will have another guest.
Remember at the Pirates Cove we always get the Booty!
We here at the Cove encourage and appreciate all Comments and Feedback from our readers.
