lodirulz
Hank Scorpio
Live as the color red in a world of black and white.
Posts: 6,412
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Post by lodirulz on Dec 24, 2011 18:46:20 GMT -5
A brief display of pyrotechnics sends vibrations through the arena, as the fans are on their feet, going crazy for tonight's episode of TNA Impact.
Tenay: With chaos surrounding the very foundations of TNA, we welcome you to TNA Impact! I'm Mike Tenay, as always joined by Don West, and Don, tonight is shaped up to be a very interesting fallout to Final Resolution!
West: Who cares about that? IT"S ALMOST CHRISTMAS TIME! And everyone knows what that means: THE ANNUAL SANTA"S WORKSHOP KNOCKOUT"S STREET FIGHT! Everybody be sure to get your cameras out, the Internets going to be ON FIRE tonight!
Tenay: But let's not forget about the World Title situation! At Final Resolution, both Sting and Mr. Anderson both got the pin in a fatal four way match, but it was ruled a draw, due to both Samoa Joe and D'Angelo Dinero's shoulders being down as the pinfalls were occurring. This has sparked a ton of debate over who the true World Heavyweight champion is, and what should be done for the main event at Genesis. We understand that the Interim Management Director of TNA, Ric Flair, will try to clear things up here tonight.
West: Plus another TNA holiday tradition, the Grab the Reindeer Ladder Match! Either James Storm or Brutus Magnus will end up having to wear the Raindeer costume, and be humiliated in front of the fans in attendance, and a worldwide viewing audience! I can't wait!
Tenay: We also have Christmas Chaos Cage Match on tap for you, and a Double North Pole match to determine who receives a future World Tag Team Title match in the champions Tommy Mercer and Phil Shatter.
West: So grab a cup of hot cocoa, gather round the fire, wrap up in a blanket, and don't move another muscle! Tis the season to the watch TNA Impact, LIVE from Orlando Florida!
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lodirulz
Hank Scorpio
Live as the color red in a world of black and white.
Posts: 6,412
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Post by lodirulz on Dec 24, 2011 18:48:52 GMT -5
Angelina! Baby where are you?
I'm right here Papi Chulo
Angelina all of a sudden comes out in a "Santa's Helper" outfit
God I hope to god Velvet isn't copying my outfit
Baby, Its Christmas, of course she is.
But it's no fair, I actually have a thing for Big Guys
Oh trust me baby....I know
The two are leaning in for a kiss when out of the blue.....
f***ING METAL!!!!!
Out of nowhere both Moore and Neal come out plastered, and they both take a shot of eggnog
Ew, what are you guys doing?
It's Quite Simple Angelina....You see, whenever someone says f***ing Metal, they have to take a shot....Hold on a second
*Moore takes a shot*
Nice! My family has the same tradition, except our phrase is "Oh Shit it's Border Patrol"
Mind if I Try boys?
They all look at eachother
Go For It
She takes in a deep breath
f***ING METAL f***ING METAL f***ING METAL f***ING METAL f***ING METAL f***ING METAL!!!!
As if on cue, each of them starts handing her shot after shot after shot after shot after shot after shot after shot.
Woah....I'm feeling a little dizzy
Thanks guys, you just made my night alot easier
Hernandez grabs their bottle of Eggnog and sniffs it
Hmm.....1/4 Vodka with 1/3 Tequilla and 1/2 Rum....Nice....what do you guys call this drink?
The Tra La La!!!!
Tra La La?
Yeah, because anyone who drinks it will turn into Captain Underpants after a couple drinks
The eyes on Hernandez widen and he starts to smile a dasterdly smily
GOTTA GO!
He chugs down the rest of the eggnog and runs after Angelina
Aww there goes the liquor
Don't worry buddy, Red's got more....thats why he's a DJ now
Where is he anyway?
I don't know, he said something about training for X Factor.....lets go find him
Ok hold on
All of a sudden Neal breaks through a wall and pulls out a bottle of Whiskey
How'd you get that?
By breaking the fourth wall.....now lets go
and now they walk away
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Deleted
Deleted Member
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Post by Deleted on Dec 24, 2011 18:49:10 GMT -5
Damn.....we've lost him
He is now Lodi Russo
*bows my head in a moment of Silence*
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Post by MikeyMania on Dec 24, 2011 18:49:24 GMT -5
Woo! Impact! ...I'm only here for about another twenty minutes. ...I once did an Impact in 36 minutes. See if you can break the record! ;D
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Deleted
Deleted Member
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Post by Deleted on Dec 24, 2011 18:58:59 GMT -5
Was my promo that awesome that it scared Lodi away?
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lodirulz
Hank Scorpio
Live as the color red in a world of black and white.
Posts: 6,412
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Post by lodirulz on Dec 24, 2011 19:03:04 GMT -5
Tenay: I-I-just-wow. West: I know! Did you see Angelina Love's outfit? Amazing! Tenay: Never mind that! Did you just see what I just saw? West: .... Sorry, I was thinking of that outfit again. What were you saying? Tenay: (Sighs) Let's go to the ring.
Jeremy Borash: The following contest is scheduled for one fall! Introducing first, from Cameron, North Carolina, weighing in at 236 pounds, Matt Hardy!
Tenay: Matt Hardy struggling in recent weeks, but tonight could be the beginning of a comeback for the seasoned veteran. West: Are you kidding? Hernandez is going to skip rope with the guy! He's nothing short of a monster!
Jeremy Borash: And his opponent, from Houston, Texas, weighing in at 285 pounds, Hernandez!
Tenay: After what could possibly be described as a robbery from up north, Hernandez has just participated in what could have just been one of the strangest segments I've ever seen in this business. Can he use that to his advantage tonight with a victory? West: As far as I'm concerned, the future is bright for this big man. And it all begins with ole Fat Hardy here tonight on Impact! Prepare for a beatdown of a lifetime, prison gang style!
Matt Hardy vs Hernandez 3 votes, 10 minutes.
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Post by MikeyMania on Dec 24, 2011 19:05:47 GMT -5
Hernandez with a sidewalk slam.
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Deleted
Deleted Member
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Post by Deleted on Dec 24, 2011 19:07:00 GMT -5
Hernandez Prison Gang Styles Matt Hardy.....
....Wait a Second....
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TOO SWEET
Grimlock
Not a doctor, nor do I play one on tv.
Posts: 13,109
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Post by TOO SWEET on Dec 24, 2011 19:07:20 GMT -5
Hernandez with a boot
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lodirulz
Hank Scorpio
Live as the color red in a world of black and white.
Posts: 6,412
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Post by lodirulz on Dec 24, 2011 19:08:13 GMT -5
Bear with me, it takes quite a bit to set things up.
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Deleted
Deleted Member
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Post by Deleted on Dec 24, 2011 19:09:12 GMT -5
We know Lodi.....most of us have covered for shows (Ii've covered for 2 1/4....one TNA, one NXT, and a 1/4 of Raw )
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lodirulz
Hank Scorpio
Live as the color red in a world of black and white.
Posts: 6,412
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Post by lodirulz on Dec 24, 2011 19:18:14 GMT -5
Hardy hits the big man with lefts and rights, trying to stagger Hernandez. It doesn't work!
Tenay: Man, what can you do to get this guy off his feet? West: Simply put: You can't!
Hardy hits the ropes, and is able to catch Hernandez with a low dropkick. Hernandez goes to one knee!
Tenay: Maybe we spoke too soon!
Hardy bounces off the ropes once more- ONLY TO BE CAUGHT WITH A BIG BOOT TO THE HEAD!
West: UN-FREAKING BELIEVABLE! Tenay: What force on that boot to the skull! That could put anyone's lights out in a hurry!
Hernandez laughs, as he picks up a limp Hardy: It's academic from now. BORDER TOSS!
Tenay: Ugh. Hernandez throwing Hardy halfway across the ring. West: Hand Hardy a pillow, he's not waking up till next Christmas!
Hernandez puts his foot on Hardy's chest.....
1.......
2.......
3!
Jeremy Borash: Here is your winner, Hernandez!
West: Take a good look at him Mike Tenay. This is your future of TNA, right here! Tenay: He certainly impressed tonight. But how will the former powerhouse of LAX fare in 2012?
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lodirulz
Hank Scorpio
Live as the color red in a world of black and white.
Posts: 6,412
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Post by lodirulz on Dec 24, 2011 19:26:55 GMT -5
Jeremy Borash: Our next contest here on TNA Impact, is scheduled for one fall! Introducing first, from The Manila Philippines, weighing in at 170 pounds, Miguel Cesaro!
Jeremy Borash: And his opponent. From Venice California, weighing in at 184 pounds, Brian Kendrick!
Tenay: And we return straight to the ring with some X-Division Action, with a former X-Division champion! West: Kendrick looking to rebound after Robbie E "Fist Pumped His Face" at Final Resolution! I hope Kendrick enjoys the bottom of the ladder, because he's going to stay there! I'm a "Bro 4 Life!" Tenay: Oh brother.....
Miguel Cesaro vs Brian Kendrick 3 Votes, 10 Minutes.
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lodirulz
Hank Scorpio
Live as the color red in a world of black and white.
Posts: 6,412
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Post by lodirulz on Dec 24, 2011 19:31:17 GMT -5
I'll be back, I got presents to hand out. It is Christmas Eve after all.
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Deleted
Deleted Member
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Post by Deleted on Dec 24, 2011 19:34:39 GMT -5
Kendrick kicks Lodi in the head for walking away on us.....but then Cesaro clotheslines him as Robbie E looks on laughing his ass off Take your time Lodi, were not trippin
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TOO SWEET
Grimlock
Not a doctor, nor do I play one on tv.
Posts: 13,109
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Post by TOO SWEET on Dec 24, 2011 19:47:31 GMT -5
Cesaro with a suplex
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lodirulz
Hank Scorpio
Live as the color red in a world of black and white.
Posts: 6,412
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Post by lodirulz on Dec 24, 2011 19:48:46 GMT -5
I'll be honest.... who won there?
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Deleted
Deleted Member
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Post by Deleted on Dec 24, 2011 19:55:26 GMT -5
Cesaro....my vote was for him as well lol
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lodirulz
Hank Scorpio
Live as the color red in a world of black and white.
Posts: 6,412
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Post by lodirulz on Dec 24, 2011 20:06:36 GMT -5
Kendrick goes to Irish whip Cesaro into the turnbuckle, Miguel reverses it, Kendrick springboards off the ropes, Cesaro grabs the legs, and throws Kendrick to the mat! Cover....
1.....
2.....
Kickout!
Miguel climbs to the top turnbuckle, looking for a big high flying move. He jumps off the ropes, going for a splash, but Kendrick moves out of the way!
Tenay: The action getting more fast paced here, just another example of the X-Division! West: Hold the phone! Check this out!
As both men lie prone on the mat, Becky Bayless hops onto the apron!
Tenay: What's she doing out here? Bayless has no business out here right now!
As the referee tells her to leave, Robbie E runs in, giving Kendrick the Fist Pump Cutter!
Tenay: OH COME ON! West: YES! The cutter nails, and with beautiful execution!
Robbie grins and laughs, leaving the ring through the crowd. Bayless gets off the apron, as Cesaro crawls over for the cover!
1........
2.........
3!
Jeremy Borash: Here is your winner, Miguel Cesaro!
Tenay: DAMN IT! Robbie E and Becky Bayless of The Shore just screwed Kendrick out of a victory! West: Ha ha, I love it! The inmates are running the asylum with no sight of Ric Flair! Tenay: You might love this despicable act right now, but it's unfortunately is going to get better for you. To the back right now, where a pre taped interview took place before the show.
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lodirulz
Hank Scorpio
Live as the color red in a world of black and white.
Posts: 6,412
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Post by lodirulz on Dec 24, 2011 20:09:25 GMT -5
Hello and Merry Christmas TNA fans! Up next is the Santa's Workshop match tonight involving Angelina Love and this woman who will have you saying "ho ho ho"... Velvet Sky.
*Velvet walks on screen wearing a very skimpy Ms. Claus outfit.*
And what is that supposed to mean JB?
I'm just saying you are looking very good in that outfit tonight.
So that's it huh? Angelina and I are about to write yet another chapter in the never ending saga that was the Beautiful People. And all you have to comment about is the way that I'm dressed?
I...
Do you even realize that tonight's match is a street fight? Or did you just forget everything after the Santa's Workshop? This match is going to be an all out brawl, no disqualifications, no count outs... no holds barred. Weapons are not only allowed, they are encouraged. This is something that you should bring full body armor to, and they put us in this? I mean look at this thing! Bikini's offer better protection! All in hopes that something might just slip!
JB, I've been with this company for four years, and week after week it has been the same thing for me. I'm trying to become a serious contender for the Women's Championship, and every week all I hear is "flaught your assests" and "sex sells". Well, after tonight, I'm done with all of that. No more skimpy santa outfits, no more middle rope gyrations, no more anything that isn't stepping in that ring and kicking some ass.
So enjoy your the little peep show tonight, boys. Cause it will be the last.
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