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Post by teamireland on Sept 26, 2008 16:57:43 GMT -5
BACKSTAGE- EWT ARENA
*Team Ireland are assembled with Marisol Kaneshall. Coach O'Hare, of course, being the directly at the front.*
Marisol: I'm here with...
*Coach O'Hare snaps the mic from Marisol's hands & Maeve shoves her out of camera range.*
O'Hare: Liam, I don't know what it's going to take... We destroyed you. We destroyed your girlfriend, yet you still won't see sense. That being so, I don't think we need anyone of such underwhelming intelligence being associated with Team Ireland. It's no longer my wish that you decide to rejoin us... Now all I want is to be rid of you. With two participants in the Barbed Wire Bunkhouse Stampede Battle Royal & only one of you, a man with no allies, I think it's fairly obvious that the odds lie in our favour here. Who knows... maybe Shane or Sean will cause you such a grievous injury that you'll have to permanently leave EWT.
Sean: Look, to be fair Coach, I'm not too sure. I mean, I don't know that I'll be able to concentrate on Liam. Hve you not seen that that big benny Pinkmist is in the match? What if he, like, tries somethin'? Y'know... with me?
Maeve: Jesus! Would you ever get over yourself, Sean? You're not even that good-looking, so you're not.
Sean: Ach, yer hole! I know you fancy me, love, but then, I'm so unbelievably gorgeous I don't blame ya, like.
*Maeve cocks an eyebrow at Sean's fanciful suggestion.*
Sean: The more I think about it, the more it makes sense. I mean, here I am... a f***in' ride anallananyways, that lad Pinkmist probably sees me & he just turns into a steamer 'cause I'm that beautiful.
O'Hare: Sean will ya shut up for a second?! The point is, Liam, even though there are 10 men in that ring, you'll be utterly alone. Every man for himself; Nobody in that ring is allied to eachother like thse two lads. Team Ireland have the match won before it's even begun.
Aidan: And, lads, while ya's are in there, but in a few shots at Dave Davies will ya? I'd appreciate it.
O'Hare: Hell, take a few shots at Mysth, Duke, Bad Man, Maelstrom, Ape & Pinkmist too! Show all of those bastards what they should already know... YOU WILL NEVER BEAT THE IRISH!
*Star Wipe to the next thing.*
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Sigma: Current SRW Champ!
Dennis Stamp
Writes about wrestling, does videos about game shows, helps transpeople, loves baseball etc.
Posts: 4,525
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Post by Sigma: Current SRW Champ! on Sept 26, 2008 17:58:43 GMT -5
(Bell Rings)
GMC: Ladies and gentlemen, our next contest here at EWT is scheduled for one fall. Already in the ring, from Tampa, Florida; weighing in at 122 pounds, Brie Bella.
Tony Schiavone: Brie Bella looking to make an impact here at EWT.
Jesse Ventura: She’s known for some real trickery, but it’ll take more than that to take care of Vile.
(“Goodbye Blood and Rose plays, crowd boos)
GMC: And her opponent, being led to the ring by her mentor, Sigma; From Parts Unknown, weighing in at 165 pounds…VILE!
Tony Schiavone: Vile being led to the ring by Sigma, they must be planning something.
Jesse Ventura: Well either that, or Chance and Ratings needed some alone time to plan out what they’re going to do to Sammy Stardust and Spaz at Massacre.
Tony Schiavone: That very well may be the case because Sigma won’t have any help to fall back on when he faces off against Joe One in the Japanese Death Match. And remember, the loser of that match will leave EWT for good.
Jesse Ventura: High risk, but whoever wins that will probably have a fast track to any title they want to.
Tony Schiavone: I can only imagine who they’d both go after.
Jesse Ventura: Probably after Dave Davies, the EWT World champion.
(Bell Rings)
Tony Schiavone: Well not to sneeze much at Vile, because she’s going against GND Champion D’Zee for the title in a Barb-wire match. So, Massacre is shaping up to be a gigantic bloodbath. As what Vile is doing right now with a stiff knee to the midsection of Brie Bella.
Jesse Ventura: Brie is very small and compact, so Vile must take away any advantage that she might use in her favor. As evident by that hard scoop slam to the mat by Vile and an elbow drop to follow it up with.
Tony Schiavone: Brie trying to roll out, but Vile grabs an arm and drags her back to the middle of the ring and has a good arm-bar on Brie Bella.
Jesse Ventura: Every so often you seem to have a way out, but your opponent will find the hole and drive right through and pull you back in.
Tony Schiavone: Vile, deciding that the arm is weak enough, lifts her up by her hair, Irish whipping her to the ropes and delivers a picture perfect dropkick that sends her right over the top rope.
Jesse Ventura: This could be a mistake. Brie loves to go outside for some reason. And I was right as she slips underneath the ring.
Ref: 1…….2
Tony Schiavone: As the ref makes the count, Vile is standing there in the ring, but Sigma senses something as he goes to the other side of the ring.
Ref: 3……4….5
Jesse Ventura: He must have seen Brie go underneath the ring, and looks to be measuring up for something.
Tony Schiavone: He has seen something as someone is quickly coming out to the ring and that’s Brie Bella, but something is amiss.
Ref: 6…….7
Jesse Ventura: What could be amiss about that?
Tony Schiavone: Well, Sigma for one as he lays her out with a stiff clothesline.
Ref: 8…..
Jesse Ventura: That would be amiss. Sigma usually doesn’t do that. But he’s a gentleman enough to roll her back into the ring. But now he’s going under the ring and he grabbed something that’s human.
Tony Schiavone: Wait, that’s also Brie Bella!
Jesse Ventura: There are two of them?
Tony Schiavone: Vile doesn’t care, as she sets the Brie Bella that’s in the ring and delivers a massively stiff Reploid Buster to her.
Jesse Ventura: Very stiff indeed, but Sigma’s throwing the other Brie Bella in the ring.
Tony Schiavone: Sigma’s telling her to do the same thing to that one. Vile sets up that Brie Bella and gives that one the Reploid Buster.
Jesse Ventura: In the business that would be 2 for the price of one.
Ref: 1……2…..3!
(Bell Rings)
Tony Schiavone: Brie Bella thought that trick would work on Vile, but Sigma intercepted that plan quickly.
GMC: Ladies and Gentlemen, your winner, VILE!
Tony Schiavone: A quick, but decisive win for Vile.
Jesse Ventura: Brie Bella was all flash, but no substance. D’Zee is no flash, but all substance. Vile may have picked the worst match to go in against D’Zee. She usually fights in Barb-Wired rings when she boxes. But here, Vile grabs one limp Brie Bella and just puts her lights out with the Reploid Buster, but Sigma throws in another Brie Bella, so Vile gives her a Reploid Buster for her efforts. She pins both at the same time and wins the match. Your winner, Vile.
(Run Massacre promo)
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ape
Unicron
Aunt Blabby Tells All.
bea wants all you sweathogs to take a look at what a REAL man is supposed to look like
Posts: 3,223
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Post by ape on Sept 29, 2008 11:58:10 GMT -5
*the camera fades into a bright, bright room. the room is so bright that the lens is almost flaring. the room has spotless, white padded walls...and in the middle of all of the bright, pure white room...is psychoapeguy wearing dingy, battered clothes covered in blood stains. the camera zooms in on him and you can see the graphic image of ape peeling back the skin in his wounds and poking at the tendons found beneath. after a few moments, ape looks up and begins to speak.*
...hehe...people thought it was a one-time deal...."ape returns because it's a hardcore style match"...hehe..."once the match is over, he'll be gone"....hehe.....well.....what happens when the most sadistic man in the history of this company wins a belt....hehe....wins a belt that encourages violence?....hehe....i'll tell you what happens....hehe...i'll tell you what happens, my friends....hehe....people will bleed.
*ape begins to punch the open wound he had been inspecting, causing it to bleed heavily. ape then reaches for the toolshed belt sitting next to him and smears his own blood all over the belt.*
....hehe....in the ewt, this may be officially called the toolshed championship....hehe but as long as i'm champion, you can call me the bloodshed champion...hehe....'cause it's guaranteed that as long as i hold this belt.....hehehe.....as long as i hold this belt....each and every person that comes to play with me....hehe....they're gonna bleed.....they're gonna bleed....hehe.....this is going to be so much fun! hehe.......hehehehehehehahahahahahaaaaa!
*ape jumps to his feet and begins to wipe the blood still pouring from his wound all over the clean, white floors and padded walls. as his is doing this, a number of white coats come in to try and sustain the deranged champion...a couple go down at the hands of psychoapeguy...but the strength in numbers eventually overcomes him as they pile on top and begin to strap on a straight jacket. the camera fades to black with the sounds of psychoapeguy laughing at all the wonderful fun he is having.*
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Post by invaderdave on Oct 1, 2008 10:33:30 GMT -5
Louden Noxious stands in the middle of the ring, microphone in hand.
Louden: Ladies and gentlemen of the Extreme Wrestlecrap Threaderation audience, I am Louden Noxious, coming to you from the world of Kaiju Big Battel! Where monsters are real, and danger can happen. The following contest is scheduled for one fall, and it is for the EWT Tag Team Championship! CHIKARA senior referee Bryce Remsburg is your official this evening.
The crowd loudly cheers, but dies down suddenly when instead of the familiar beginning of the Weird Al tune, they're treated with the NESkimos version of Mega Man II level start music, followed by the NESkimos version of the Mega Man II start screen music. When the Nyrds blast through the curtain, their signature "N" hand signal thrown up into the air, the crowd erupts again. Joel and Mike then look at eachother, hit a jumping high five, then race down the ramp, circling the ring at high speeds at least three times, slapping hands with fans in the front row, while Louden makes his announcements.
Louden: First up, the challengers! Hailing from Deep 13, Wisconsin, and weighing in at three-hundred and forty-three...THOUSAND pounds! They just returned from Japan after a marathon Life Force gaming session, they are JOEL NELSON and MIKE HODGSON, THEEEEEEEEEEEEE NYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYRDS!
Joel and Mike end up on opposite sides of the ring, and hop up onto the apron. Springboarding into the ring, they meet, mid-air, in the middle of the ring with another high five, and land to run up to the nearest turnbuckles and throw up their "N" for another round of cheers. The two then moonsault off their perches, and retreat to their corner.
Their video game music is then replaced by the extended version of Rhapsody's "Emerald Sword", and Angus MacAngus and the Emerald Warrior, the Highland Diamonds, push their way through the curtain as the intro to the song crescendos, and the first guitar breaks in. Their tag title belts slung over their shoulders, they give the crowd a gruff look, before sauntering down to the ring at a medium pace, Louden once again making his announcements.
Louden: And their opponents, the current, reigning, and defending Extreme Wrestlecrap Threaderation Tag Team Champions! Hailing from the emerald, grassy highlands of Scotland, and at a combined weight which is uncalculable at this point in time. They are ANGUS MACANGUS, THE EMERALD WARRIOR, THE HIGHLAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAND DIIIIIIIAMOOOOOOOOOOOOONDS!
Louden rolls out of the ring, and takes a seat at ringside, while the Diamonds climb up onto the apron, and into the ring. Holding their belts up aloft for the crowd to see (that they still own the titles), the crowd loudly boos the Diamonds, especially given that they're taking on they're old favorites in Joel and Mike. Bryce makes sure both teams stay in their corner, as he walks over to the Diamonds to take their belts. Angus feigns disinterest as he hands the belt to Bryce, but the Emerald Warrior keeps a firm grasp on his belt as Bryce tries to pull it away, letting it go just as Bryce gives a sharp tug.
Bryce takes a belt in each hand, and holds it up in the air for the crowd to see whats on the line. Handing the belts to the outside, Bryce slips back into the middle of the ring, holds his hands up, and calls for the bell...
Bryce: RING THE BELL!
The bell rings, and this shindig is under way! Joel decides to start things off for the team, as Angus decides to be in first as well. As the two circle eachother, and lock up, the commentary team pipes up.
Larry Sweeney: Ain't no doubt about, bay-beh! Twenty-two time ICW/ICWA Tex-Arcana Television Champion, Sweet n' Sour Larry Sweeney here, and with me in the booth is my spiritual mentor, UltraMantis Black. How ya doin', Mantis?
UltraMantis Black: Ohhh, Larry Sweeney, it is a fine, dark day, one that is off-set by a match such as this. I much look forward to these Scottish Highlanders to take down this nerds.
Sweeney: Alright, cool, glad to have ya at my side, Mantis. So, who we got in the ring here, no too familiar with these fellas.
UltraMantis: I believe the bespectacled one in the ring at this moment would be one called Joel Nelson, and the larger red-haired gentleman is known as Angus MacAngus.
Sweeney: Kay, sounds good to me. Personally, I like the look of these Highland Diamond folks, they're buff, they're cut, and they're big. Those Nyrds better grow about six inches fast, because otherwise, I don't think we'll be seeing a very long match.
During the entire introduction portion, the lock up had changed into a hammerlock, formed by Angus onto Joel. Angus then pulled Joel into a headlock, and began powering him down to the mat, punching his head a few times whenever Joel tried to break free. Joel, having no other option, stomps down hard on Angus's foot, causing Angus to relinquish his hold, and pay more attention to his throbbing toes. Joel, breaking free, backs into the ropes, and bounces back to land a quick headscissors on Angus. Angus immediately pops back up, into a waiting Joel's armdrag. Angus pops up once again, but this time he's ready, as he blocks Joel's hiptoss attempt, countering with his own hiptoss. Joel, however, rolls to his feet, and hits the ropes again, this time springboarding backwards in an attempted flying enziguri. Angus ducks this attempt, and Joel lands behind him. Angus spins around looking for a spinning roundhouse kick, which Joel ducks. Joel responds by sweep kicking Angus's free foot out from under neath him, planting him flat on his back. Joel spins around, looking for a standing moonsault, but ends up eating the mat, as Angus rolls out of the way. Both reach their feet at the same time, and find themselves at a stalemate, which the crowd applauds.
Sweeney: Very fast and furious action in our opening moments here, Mantis. Angus is a pretty big lookin' guy, but he's fast too, and I'm likin' that.
UltraMantis: Indeed, Palomino, but these young, nerdy rapscallions must feel they have something to prove, as they haven't held gold since the year of two-aught-aught-five.
Sweeney: Thats true, Mantis, but if these two nerdy jay-brones wanna impress the Sweet n' Sour one, they'd better pull out all the stops.
Joel tags in Mike, whom slings himself into the ring, while Angus tags in the Emerald Warrior, whom climbs in through the ropes. The two circle eachother, and Warrior looks ready for a lock-up, until Mike steps forward, throws a hand up into the air, and announces the following;
Mike: LUCHA-RAAAAAAAAAAAN!
Mike backs himself into the ropes, and races off towards the Warrior. The Warrior side-steps him, and Mike crisscrosses to bounce off the other ropes, coming back at Warrior, top speed. This time, Warrior leap-frogs over Mike, and Mike continues to criss cross to the ropes. Mike bounces off again, and this time Warrior drops down to the mat, as Mike sails over him with a forward jumping sommersault, which elicits a gasp of surprise from the crowd. Mike lands on his feet, and hits the ropes yet again, as Warrior pops up from the mat. As Mike comes back at Warrior, he flapjacks the Nyrd into the air. Mike responds by hooking Warrior up for a satellite head-scissors, tumbling Warrior down to the mat. Seeing Warrior jump back up from the mat, Mike takes off for the nearest corner, and runs up it, Tiger Mask style, flipping himself over the Warrior, whom had chased after him. Warrior spins around, swinging his arm for a wild backchop, which Mike promptly dodges by bridging backwards, Matrix style.
Mike manages to roll out of the way when the Warrior pops up, bouncing off the ropes for an impromptu Vader splash, rolling himself out to the apron. Mike waits for the Warrior to stand, then slingshots into the ring, landing the Warrior with a hurricanrana, sending the Warrior tumbling to the mat once more. Mike races over to his corner, and tags in Joel, whom jumps into the ring to join his friend. Both run over to the Warrior, and pull him to his feet. The two then tandem Irish whip him to the nearest set of ropes, and as he comes back, land him with a double hiptoss. However, they keep him on his feet, his arms twisted into their shoulders, as both Joel and Mike throw their arms up into the air, posing in the middle of the ring...
Joel and Mike: TA-DA!
Bryce, despite the roar of laughter from the crowd, forces Mike out of the ring, as Joel is now the legal man for the Nyrds.
Sweeney: Hah, I'll admit I'm havin' a good laugh here, but again, if these Nyrds wanna play in the big sandbox again, they're gonna have to quit goofin' around. I really don't think the Highland Diamonds came to play games.
Mantis: Well, if they were, I might give this match to the Nyrds, as I'm to understand they're quite adept at the art of these video games.
Sweeney: Heh, yeah, not really into the whole video game thing, though I've been known to play a pretty mean Ms. Pac-Man back in the day. How 'bout you, Mantis?
Mantis: I'm much more the Boggle type myself, Palomino.
After Joel lets the Emerald Warrior go, Warrior traipses over to his corner, and tags Angus back in. Angus takes Joel completely by surprise by springboarding in, smacking Joel down with a flying forearm. Standing over Joel, Angus mockingly shows him the Nyrds' "N" signal, and backs into the ropes, dropping a corkscrew elbow drop on the downed Nyrd. Angus reaches down, and begins wringing Joel's arm, in a sort of standing arm bar. He bends down, and pulls Joel to his feet, his arm still locked up, and strong style Irish whips him to the nearest corner. Joel hits the corner chestfirst, and a nice thud resounds throughout the arena. Joel staggers backwards, right into a waiting Angus's German suplex, which Angus follows up with a bridged pin. Bryce leaps down for the count...
1...
2...
Joel manages to kick out in time, rolling backwards out of the bridge. Angus hops back up to his feet, knowing that Joel intends to tag Mike back in, and stops him in his tracks with a waistlock. This time, Angus folds Joel's arms in front of him, and throws Joel over with an X-Plex, into another bridged pin.
1...
2...
This time, Mike springs into action, landing Angus with a baseball slide kick, forcing him off Joel. Angus takes exception to the interference, and Bryce tells Mike off, telling him to get back into his corner. In the meantime, Angus tags the Emerald Warrior back in, and the two proceed to beat down on Joel in their corner. Bryce makes it back in time to begin a five count, and Angus leaves the ring by "three." Warrior pulls Joel to his feet, and whips him to the corner opposite from his team's. Hopping up onto the second turnbuckle to build up speed, Warrior races towards Joel at top speed, and jumps at him with a flying Superman leap into Joel's stomach. Joel staggers out of the corner, doubled over, as Warrior steps out to the apron. Springboarding back in, Warrior takes Joel down with a bulldog, and follows that up with a pin.
1...
2...
Mike, again, breaks it up at two, this time with a flying double stomp on top of the Emerald Warrior's back, knocking him off Joel. Bryce, again, forces Mike back into his corner, while Angus climbs into the ring. Both pull Joel to his feet, and Angus lifts him up for a Cradle Piledriver, while Warrior grabs him for the Tombstone. They land Joel with the Concussion Syndrome, and Warrior escapes to his corner, where he slaps his hands together (to make a "tag" sound) before Bryce turns around.
Sweeney: Hahahah! I love it, I really love it! The Diamonds know tag team wrestling better than anyone I've seen in EWT so far, and they're about to walk away with this one if ya axe me!
Angus, of course, covers Joel for what is sure to be an easy pin.
1...
2...
Mike, instead of breaking up the pin, jumps into the ring, and stands in front of Bryce. Bryce stands up, ready to eject Mike back to his corner, but Mike has an ace up his sleeve; he pulls out his DS.
Mike: Bryce, lets be Pictochat buddies!
The Emerald Warrior jumps into the ring, furious that Bryce has stopped the count. Angus stands up, and while Joel lays on the mat, recupperating, Mike shows them both the finer points of Pictochat. Mike then hands the Emerald Warrior the DS...
Mike: Its a token of my esteem!
Then dropkicks him, sending the Warrior staggering backwards into a waiting Joel's lungblower. Angus responds by throwing a furious elbow, but Mike dodges, and when Angus spins back around, both Nyrds are waiting for him with their Shigeru Miyamoto rush. As Angus is reeling from their barrage of chops and elbows, the Nyrds follow up with their superkick/engugiri combo.
Sweeney: Well, what the heck is goin' on here!
Mantis: I believe that the young Michaelangelo was attempting to show the Highland Diamonds something on his Nintendo DS.
Sweeney: I don't even know what a DS is, personally, but hey, good for the Nyrds, it looks like they might be back in this shindig!
Joel picks up the groggy Angus and whips him into the ropes. As Angus rebounds, Joel leaps up and hits him with a perfectly timed dropkick. As son as Angus falls to the mat, Joel grabs Angus, twists his arm, then rolls him into a Magistral cradle!
1…
2…
Angus kicks out in the nick of time, as Mike pounds on Emerald Warrior in the corner. Joel backs Angus into the opposite corner, and both Nyrds set up the Diamonds in the corner, Mike going for the Life Force Code on Warrior while Joel attempts a tornado DDT off the turnbuckles. Both Diamonds block it however, throwing the Nyrds off. The Diamonds go for double Irish whips to send the Nyrds into each other, but the Nyrds reverse and whip the Diamonds. The Diamonds have the presence of mind to perform a do-ce-do and send themselves back for clotheslines, but the Nyrds ducks under, run past and high-five each other, and then perform stereo hurracanranas on the Diamonds! The Diamonds stagger back to regain their bearings as Bryce tries to get control, but Mike makes it easy for him as he takes Angus out of the ring with a big cross-body, sending them both tumbling over the ropes!
Mantis: Goodness gracious Larry Sweeney! Some very high-paced, fast-flying action we’re seeing here!
Sweeney: Indeed it is Mantis, but isn’t that phrase usually said the other way around?
Mantis: I know what I said and I stand by it Mister Sweeney, these 2 teams I find truly a spectacle to behold!
Joel boots Emerald Warrior in the gut and goes for a suplex, but Warrior proves to be too big and counters, hitting his own vertical suplex. He picks Joel up and grabs him, setting up an Emerald Cutter, but Joel pushes on Warrior’s knee, forcing him to kneel and break the hold. Joel then kicks Warrior in the back, then the chest, before running to the ropes and going for a shining enzugiri! Warrior ducks at the last second, and as Joel bounces off the mat Warrior sets him up, before charging in with an Emerald Gleam superkick ,flipping Joel with the impact! Warrior seizes the opportunity, quickly lifting Joel up for a backdrop suplex! He makes a pin, confident the match is over.
1…
2…
Mike dives in from nowhere, dashing across the ring and breaking it up with a double axe handle.
Sweeney: I have to say these Nyrds are starting to impress the Sweet & Sour one, what about you Mantis?
Mantis: Well they evidently have more to their gameplan than games, that’s for certain, although this Emerald Warrior threw dear Joel about like a sack of kumquats just then! They have a lot of work yet to do.
Sweeney: Kumquats? Whatever you say Mantis.
Emerald Warrior rakes Mike’s eyes, and again demands that Bryce get Mike out of the ring. Bryce gives a dubious look before attempting to usher Mike out, and Warrior takes advantage of this by dragging Joel to the Diamonds’ corner. He tags Angus while Bryce busies himself with Mike, and the two boot away at Joel, before Angus goes up top as Warrior grabs Joel, they prepare for the SJD! But Bryce suddenly dashes across the ring and stands in front of the turnbuckle, blocking Angus from diving off.
Angus: What’re ye doin!?
Bryce: You never made the tag! Get out of the ring!
Angus: O’ course we made the tag, when ye were getting’ rid o’’ that Nyrd!
Bryce: I never saw the tag, get out of the ring!
Angus: It’s not meant ta work that way! Ye’re only supposed ta do that te them!
As Bryce argues with Angus, Joel back body drops Warrior, rolls towards his corner, slaps his hands together and rolls out of the ring. Mike instantly leaps to the top turnbuckle, and as Warrior gets up, Mike dives from the top for a big missile dropkick! Warrior is sent flying and Bryce turns, declaring the Nyrds’ tag legal.
Sweeney: Wow! Turn about is fair play here! The Nyrds showing surprising cunning!
Mantis: What-he-but-I-how-that’s-where-they! I’m not sure what just happened Larry Sweeney!
Sweeney: The Nyrds took a page out of the Diamonds’ playbook! It seems 2 wrongs do in fact make a right!
The fans cheer in applause at the Nyrds returning the favour from the Diamonds, as Angus is in a rage on the apron. Mike picks Warrior up and starts laying into him with some kicks. Warrior catches a foot, and ducks Mike’s enzugiri, but Mike lands on his feet and pulls out a mule kick, knocking Warrior to the ropes. Mike stays on the mat and as Warrior rebounds, trips Warrior, a rare occasion when the drop-down succeeded in its purpose. Mike gets up in unison with Warrior and catches the defending champion in a crucifix pin, but Warrior slips out before Bryce can count, deadlifts Mike into a fireman’s carry, and flips Mike onto his feet before running Mike head first with a bulldog into a neutral corner, Warrior vaulting the ropes onto the apron in the process. As Mike collapses, Warrior goes up for the Five Star Moonsault, but misses! He gets up groggy and Mike performs an impressive tiltawhirl armdrag on Warrior, although Warrior, no stranger to lucha, rolls to his feet, leaps to the middle ropes, and dives into a flying armdrag on Mike! Mike gets up and goes for a traditional armdrag, but Warrior blocks it with power, pulling Mike back and up, but Mike slips over into a schoolboy! Warrior frees himself instantly and spins around, attempting to apply the Emerald City Stretch, but before he can apply the pressure Mike rolls through into a bridging pin!
1…
2…
Angus punts Mike in the side to break it up. As Bryce tries to back Angus up, Angus just pushes him out of the way, grabs Mike, and throws him with a big Exploder suplex, Angus then follows it into a Flower of Scotland! Mike is in pain, but Bryce refuses to let Angus intimidate him and starts a 5 count. Angus breaks on 4 and swiftly exits the ring.
Mantis: The fun loving duo are certainly giving it their all, but their efforts are repeatedly being battered back down it would seem.
Sweeney: Eh, I don’t know if I’d call the Diamonds fun-lovin’, but they are having problems here.
Mantis: Oho, I see what you did there! Oh Larry Sweeney, how you make me guffaw so.
Warrior uses the momentum shift to catch his breath. Both men are down and dazed, and Bryce starts a KO count. He reaches 5 when Warrior makes the tag, and Angus dashes across the ring, hurling himself onto Mike to stop his progress to his corner. Angus picks Mike up and sinks a few hooking punches into his ribs, and the plucky challenger staggers in pain. Angus immediately follows it with a high angle T-Bone suplex, and the second Mike bounces into a sitting position, Angus is on top of him, applying a chinlock. He turns it into a seated abdominal stretch as the fans start to clap for Mike to get up. Angus grins at the crowd, shaking his head. Mike continues to hold on, before banging on the mat to appeal to the crowd. Angus screams at Bryce that Mike is tapping out, and for a moment Bryce pauses as if to say “Really!?” before composing himself and asking Mike again. Mike starts to battle to his feet, and tries to hiptoss himself free, but Angus is too big and winds Mike with an elbow to the side. He keeps the hold in, and as Mike finds he can’t power out, he wobbles Angus with some fancy footwork clipping at his ankle, before slipping under, taking Angus over with a low fireman’s carry takedown, and diving for Joel, making the tag! Joel vaults in and takes Angus down with a forearm, he sees Warrior coming and catches him with a Cool Runnings-style spinning kick! He sees Angus stirring and takes him out with a running knee attack, before bouncing off the ropes, charging at Warrior again, and laying him out with a shining enzugiri! Joel then returns to Angus, as Mike, now recovered, grabs him, and they seem to be attempting to leave Angus Fragged! Mike tries to lift Angus, but Angus just back body drops Mike into Joel, taking them both out.
Mantis: The action is never ceasing! This is quite remarkable.
Sweeney: Whatever the outcome, these 2 have certainly gone up a few notches in my eyes.
Angus signals to Warrior, and Warrior lifts Joel up into an Electric Chair. Angus slaps Joel, flopping him back in position for the International Acclaim combo. Angus backs up and runs, hitting the dropkick and Warrior uses he momentum to pitch Joel up and forwards. But as Angus rebounds to complete it, he is suddenly cut off with a neckbreaker takedown from Mike! Joel uses the momentum from being thrown forward to reverse it, and as Warrior tries to perform the electric chair facebuster, Joel ducks his head and rolls him up into a Victory Roll! Bryce drops down
1…
2…
….3?!!
Louden gets on the microphone as the bell rings, and Joel topples back in joy while the Emerald Warrior is shocked.
Louden: Ladies and gentlemen, you bear witness to the crowning of the new Extreme Wrestlecrap Threaderation Tag Team Champions, the kooky Koopa loving gamers-come-wrestlers, Joel & Mike, the Nyrds!!!
The new NESkimos music starts up again as Joel and Mike roll out of the ring in joy, hugging Bryce, hugging Louden, hugging the timekeeper, before hugging their newly won tag team titles and high-fiving. They climb over the rails by the ramp and make their way backstage through the crowd, slapping fans’ hands on the way.
Sweeney: Bah gawd almighty! What have we just witnessed!? This has me channelling the spirit of Jim Ross himself!
Mantis: I too am in an equal level of shock Palomino, yet I do not believe I have metamorphosed into either Jerry Lawler or The Tazz! This is simply incredible!
Sweeney: New EWT tag team champions! Against everyone’s expectations the Nyrds did it, and in only the Diamonds’ second authorised defence of their titles at that!
Mantis: Scintillating stuff, Sweeney! Those 2 young men re now amongst the few twice-champions in the history of the EWT!
Angus and Warrior are stunned, and can’t believe it. They initially start arguing amongst themselves, before turning to Bryce.
Angus: You! Ye cost us the match! Ye screwed us!
Warrior: You counted their tag but not ours!
Angus: Ye fast counted their pin!
Warrior: You pulled my hair!
Bryce:….No I didn’t.
The Diamonds, humiliated by Bryce’s simple but true response, turn their attentions on Louden. They roll out of the ring!
Angus: Ye didn’t announce us properly! Ye didn’t announce our weight right!
Warrior: If it wasn’t for you, we’d still be champions! But now you’ve ruined my life!!!
Louden smiles bemusedly, as the Diamonds seethe and froth, turning to leave. Angus snatches up his kilt, but is so disgusted he tosses it at a fan in the audience, who just tosses it right back. Angus doesn’t bother to retrieve it and the Diamonds march out of the ring, while the Nyrds’ music still plays in celebration of their victory.
*cut to adverts*
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Post by SsnakeBite, the No1 Frenchman on Oct 3, 2008 6:56:45 GMT -5
*After some commercials, we fade back to the EWT arena. An announcer is standing in the middle of the ring.*
Announcer: Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls... LET'S GET READY TO RU... er... I mean, the following contest is a singles match, scheduled for one fall!
*ODB's theme blasts through the speakers as the big woman from TNA appears, doing her usual antics, getting a fairly good reaction from the crowd.*
Announcer: Introducing first, from Mustang Ranch, las Vegas, Nevada, weighing in at 130 lbs, One Dirty Bitch, OOOO-DEEE-BEEEEEEE!!
*She makes her way to the ring and slides inside it. After drinking some of her alcohol, she strikes a pose and waits for her opponent. After a few seconds, “Hysteria” by Muse starts playing and Ivy Rosepine appears and the crowd cheers again, followed closely by the Darkness in the Light, Mysth. She smiles and blinks while striking a sexy pose.*
Announcer: Please welcome The French Connection! The participant to tonight's match is hailing from Lille, France, she is Sexually Suggestive IVYYYY ROSEPIIIINE!!
*Ivy high fives crowd members on her way to the ring. She climbs inside the ring as Mysth goes at ringside. She climbs a turnbuckle and poses for the crowd again, then climbs back down and looks right at ODB.*
DING DING!
*The two women quickly lock up. ODB seems to be taking the advantage as Ivy starts leaning backwards, but she soon starts striking ODB with knees to the belly. Ivy manages to shove ODB away, but keep a hold of her right wrist, allowing her to hit ODB with a Short-Arm Clothesline. As ODB makes it to a sitting position, Ivy knocks her back to the ground with a Dropkick to the face. Ivy picks up ODB, who manages to grab her to the midsection for a Spinebuster. After a taunt, ODB drops an elbow, but Rosepine rolls out of the way. Seeing that ODB is down, she quickly applies a Juji-Gatame Armbar. ODB groans in pain and desperately tries to get her arm out of the hold, but that only adds more pressure and hurts her more. After a few seconds though, she manages to put her leg on the bottom rope, forcing Ivy to release the hold. The two women get up and Ivy blows a playful kiss to ODB to taunt her. This angers the strong woman, who charges for a Clothesline with her uninjured arm, but Ivy obviously expected that reaction as she ducks, turns around and hits ODB with an Enzuigiri. ODB falls down and Ivy hooks the leg.*
ONE...
TWO... KICK OUT!
*Ivy quickly gets up and so does ODB, who looks mightily angered. Ivy charges for a Clothesline, looking to knock ODB over the top rope, but ODB ducks and shoves Ivy over the top rope. Ivy manages to land on the apron and not to fall outside, only for ODB to grab her by the hair and pull her back inside, making her fall hard on the mat. Mysth complains about ODB illegally pulling Ivy's hair. ODB's response to Mysth and the referee is a loud scream and a taunt. Ivy is making it on all four, and grabs her, setting up a Neckbreaker, but Ivy shoves her forward and sends her face first into a turnbuckle. Ivy bends over her for a sexy pose, before rushing at ODB for the Guêpière! ODB falls on her back and Ivy climbs the turnbuckle and goes for the Shooting Star Stomp, but ODB barely has time to roll on her side and avoid the move! Ivy loses her balance as she didn't expect her opponent to dodge the move, which allows ODB to grab her for a School Boy!*
ONE...
KICK OUT!
*The two women get up. ODB is already on her knees when Ivy is making it to a sitted position, and ODB simply bitchslaps the French woman. ODB goes on by picking up Ivy and striking her with forearms, then she Irish whips Ivy into a turnbuckle. ODB drinks some more alcohol, then comes running to the turnbuckle, crushing Ivy mercilessly! Ivy falls forward, clutching her chest and belly. ODB then climbs the turnbuckle against which she just crushed her opponent. She waits for the right time and jumps for a Missile Dropkick, and Ivy manages to slap ODB away! With her opponent on the ground, Ivy bends over again, looking at ODB with a mock sorry expression, as if to say “Aaaaaw! Poor girl!”. When ODB slowly starts getting up, Ivy runs to the ropes and bounces and, due to the taunt, the crowd expects the Shining Witch, but Ivy instead goes for the Black Dog Serenade! ODB drops dead on the mat and Ivy covers!*
ONE...
TWO...
THREE!!
Announcer: And the winner of the match iiiiisss... Sexually Suggestive IVYYYY ROOOOSEPIIIIIINE!!
*”Hysteria” hits again as the crowd cheers and Mysth slides inside the ring, kissing his girlfriend to congratulate her for her performance. And we cut to the next segment.*
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Post by hardcorehensley on Oct 4, 2008 18:21:39 GMT -5
Various shots of the EWT Arena flow on the screen. Only the chattering of the audience is audible. A video begins to play on the ToomiTron. Its a package highlighting Hardcore Hensley. It reviews his near-fifteen month tenure with the company in about five minutes. Afterwards, a generic instrumental classic theme starts up. A lean man with blonde hair and baby blue eyes emerges from the back. He dons dark tights, along with the rest of your simple wrestling gear. He also holds a microphone handy.: Hardcore Hensley, Where Are You! He chuckles to himself while the fans stare not amused.: Yikes, tough crowd. Greetings, my name is Cal Owen. The past couple of weeks have proved to be quite interesting. Especially concerning Hensley. Recently, "The Hardcore One" suffered an unbelievable loss to newcomer, Charley Mac, costing him the EWT Ox Division Championship. Tis, tis, such a shame. He chuckles again, a grin broadening across his decently tan face.Owen: Alas, no word of Hensley has come up since his previous appearance. I recall his last words of something like, 'goodbye...'. I question this. What do you mean, Hensley? Are you finished? Is your wrestling career already in the books? I quote you again saying your doctors gave you not even five years. More than one has already come and gone. Was your defeat to an energetic rookie your demise? Was your loss of your title your demise? What did it? What killed you? What killed Hardcore Hensley? This is all supposing that you're actually done, of course. Again, you could just be taking a break. A much deserved one, I'll admit. All the punishment you bring yourself, all the damage, all for what? To impress THESE people! A chorus of jeers rain down, but Owen ignores them completely.Owen: I ask you, Hardcore Hensley! Why? Why the hard work? Why the undeniable effort? Why? Nobody here deserves such. You're priceless! You're a star! You should be treated as so! Yet, you attempt to impress against opponents the likes of which aren't anywhere close to your level. This makes no sense to me whatsoever. These people don't wanna see you. They wanna see you try to kill yourself. They wanna see you fly from deadly heights. They wanna see you flip through the air. They wanna see you crash through tables, ladders, chairs, barriers, glass, walls, whatever! No, I wonder, did Hardcore Hensley kill Hardcore Hensley? The boos disappear as everybody has come glued to the mysterious man.Owen: I wonder, if I am correct, was it prior to the loss of your beloved title that you were already dead? Perhaps, in your quest to dispose of one, Poe Moe Foe, you lost yourself? In all the blood, all the carnage, the wreckage, the mass destruction! Was it just too much for even Hardcore Hensley? I- "Hit Em High, Hit Em Low" interrupts the youngster to a devastating reaction. Hensley charges down the ramp in his street clothes, staring down the strange man. He has a mic of his own sticking out of his pocket. Numerous fans reach out to him, but he's totally fixed on Owen. He climbs into the ring, and immediately goes face to face, shouting explicitly.Hensley: Who the hell are you! Hardcore Hensley, Where Are You? B****, I'm right here! His fans cry out to the unforgotten tone. Owen has retreated into a corner, startled at Hensley's arrival obviously. He tries to respond, but Hensley shuts him up.Hensley: Shut the f*** up! I don't know who you think you are, but make it clear you don't know me! I'm Hardcore Hensley! I know me, and I know I ain't dead! Owen looks ready to soil himself now as the fans are eating this up.Hensley: I killed Poe Moe Foe in front of thousands in attendance, and millions watching around the world! Yeah, I lost the EWT Ox Division Championship, but I'll be damned if I didn't have one helluva run with it! Nevertheless, I accepted defeat. Charley Mac got me, he got Hardcore Hensley. Its whatever, I've moved on. I had intended to move on to much bigger and better things too, but that ain't exactly playing out the way I planned either! So I'm gonna go ahead right now and figure, since I gotta free pass on the match board apparently, I'm just go ahead and kick that ass right now! His mic falls from his grasp to the mat as he unloads on a defenseless Owen. Big right hands knock him upside his head. Owen covers up, and even slouches down into the corner, but Hensley's laying waste now. He yanks Owen back up to his feet, he's now bleeding from a cut on his head, and opens up on with stiff kicks. Owen yelps as Hensley's feet clash with his arm. Soon enough, he throws his arm over his shoulder, out of dodge. That leaves his ribcage vulnerable though, and before long he's propelled out of the ring entirely. Hensley roars at the top of his lungs, and beats upon his chest to his fans approval. He glances over his shoulder then rips his white t-shirt in true Hulk fashion before tossing it aside, almost losing his beanie as well. He checks Owen again then bounces off of the opposing ropes. He comes back towards Owen, who's now standing dazed on the outside, and flips over the top rope. They crash and burn on the floor, but Hensley's back on his feet in no time. He raises his arms in victory, so to speak, still roaring. He grabs a hold of Owen, and drags him over to the announce team's table. He bashes his head off of said table then quickly removes the covering. A monitor also gets removed as he snatches a broken wire. He wraps it around Owen's throat, and applies full pressure. Owen's jaw drops as he struggles for dear life. Hensley releases his hold before any permanent damage can take place. Still unfinished though, he drags Owen by his pretty blonde hair over to the steel ring steps. Eye brows raise as he kicks the top part off, and places Owen's head down onto the bottom. He hoists up the other part, and security files out now. They plea with him to stop what he's doing, but Hensley simply laughs at them. The crowd is now in a frenzy. Hensley fakes a few beat-downs, but ultimately launches the partial steps at the security men. He laughs out loud as he curb stomps Owen instead. Owen slides off the steel lifelessly. "Hit Em High, Hit Em Low" replays as Hensley escapes through the stands. The crowd chant his name while he vanishes, and personnel tend to the fallen Owen.
A puzzled announce team take us to a promo hyping Toomiguci's upcoming announcement for the next Post-Per-View.
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Post by Fred Fanatic on Oct 5, 2008 16:37:07 GMT -5
*A video begins to play. Mellow music plays in the background. We are outside, in a desolate place. Dead trees with no leaves sparsly inhabit the landscape. A lone shack sits in the middle of this wasteland. A man sits on the porch of this shack. He has no hair on his head. Or no eyebrows, for that matter. Or no facial hair. No hair at all on his head. He is wearing a green sweater and khaki slacks. He has something in his hands. The camera switches to an overhead view, to reveal he is stroking a rusty nail. This man begins to speak in a creepy, quiet voice. Man: Hello. My name is Fred Finger. (Deep, creepy breath). I like rusty nails. Ha ha. I like to touch them. The feeling of rust against my Freddy Fingers is almost orgasmic, ha ha. I must find..the perfect NAIL. *We cut to Fred walking up to another desolate house, who's windows are boarded. Fred rings the doorbell. An ugly child opens the door. Fred: Well hello there young child...I'm here to enquire about your...nails. *The child lets out a noise almost like a door creaking. Fred: A ha! *The two walk inside Fred: (Breathing deeply) Might I ask where you keep the nails? *The child lets out the same noise again Fred: Oh, I see. Then I must leave. But first, I would like to caress this rusty kettle. *Fred puts his hand on a rusty kettle that is sitting on the stove top. Fred: Ohhh! FRED FINGER COMING TO EWT SOON *Fade to black
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Post by Toom E. Guci on Oct 5, 2008 23:41:24 GMT -5
*Toom E Dangerously is walking backstage in the halls of the EWT Arena. Photos line the walls with Hall of Fame members as well as former champions.* 4 years now. EWT has been existence for over 4 years. And that is a pretty damn good thing. We have beaten the competition & drove them under. Many stars have come & many stars have gone. But on November 1st, we will see the Ultimate Rising Star! You see, EWT is full of pride & honor. The World Championship, for starters, has been great pride to this company. The Tri-State Championship set the standards for a secondary championship. The OX Division Champion brought champions to a new level. The Toolshed Championship just made things hardcore. The Girl Next Door Championship has given the Girl Next Door Division a shining spotlight. And the tag team champions showed that unity does indeed exist. So, you see...Extreme Wrestlecrap Threaderation is about the honor & prestige of our champions on many levels. And that's why on Vonvember 1st, 2008...we will crown the first ever EWT Rising Star. On November 1st, 6 men & 1 woman will enter the EWT Ring as champions. And all 7 will leave the ring as champions. But only 1 can be the Rising Star! Every person for themselves in this match is what you can expect. And if they all can hold their respective championships until November 1st, then they all will enter the ring.
EWT Heavyweight Champion Dave Davies
EWT Tri State Champion Bad Man
EWT Ox Division Champion Charley Mac
EWT Toolshed Champion psychoapeguy
EWT Tag Team Champion Joel Hodgson
EWT Tag Team Champion Mike Nelson
and
EWT Girl Next Door Champion Vile
A special envelope will be hanging in the center of the ring. And that envelope will contain And whomever finds a way to grab that envelope will win the money and be EWT's Rising Star in the One Million Dollar Rising Star Challenge!!! *cut to commercial*
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Post by Tea & Crumpets on Oct 6, 2008 12:45:50 GMT -5
*Cut to the Highland Diamonds lockerroom. Sum Guy is stood there, while Angus is seen sitting, staring into nothing. Emerald Warrior is nowhere to be seen.*
Sum Guy: Hi, I’m Sum Guy, and I once worked as a barber! I’m here with one half of the former……
*Sum Guy pauses, expecting the usual roaring cut-off, but Angus doesn’t budge.*
Sum Guy:…..Hey, cool, I get to talk! I’m here with one half of the former EWT World Tag Team Champions, Angus MacAngus! Angus, I think a question on everyone’s minds is, where do you go from here, now that you’ve lost the championships?
*Angus doesn’t move or speak.*
Sum Guy: Er….well, how does it feel that you lost the titles in what was only your second defence in 3 months of being champions? How would you respond to criticisms that you were not true champions?
*Angus doesn’t answer again, but his fists clench and his jaw tightens.*
Sum Guy: Er, well then, how about, what went through your minds the moment you lost the titles?
*Angus slowly turns his head to regard Sum Guy with an ice cold stare. He answers not with fire or rage, but in a soft, and very haunted tone.*
Angus: What went through mah mind? Do you have any idea how stupid a question that is? You are not a wrestler. You are just a lonely, lonely backstage interviewer. You cannae comprehend what was goin’ through mah mind then, or now.
*Emerald Warrior walks in from the shower area of the locker room in full ring gear. He closes the gap between him and Sum Guy.*
Warrior: Listen….Mr Guy. If you’re wondering, are we going to crumble, to fold? Are we going to slip down the tag ranks back to the bottom, or are we going to quit EWT, then the answer is no. The Nyrds beat us. I could say they got lucky, but it would be a lie. I made the biggest mistake of my career letting those miserable dimwits pin me. It wont happen again.
Angus: We will cash in our rematch clause. We intended to cash it in at the next Pay Per View, but now that ther’s this big fancy champions battle goin’ on, that’s impossible. That match could have been our match. But we blew it. We maybe got too cocky, maybe too relaxed. It won’t happen ever again.
Warrior: You’ve never seen us at our worst, our most dangerous, yet. Because you’ve never seen what happens when we lose championships. What happens is, a switch is flipped. Angus goes into overdrive. And I get a little bit more vicious. The Nyrds are walking with very large targets on their backs. We’ll be shooting down those targets very soon. Their reign will not be a long one. And when we get the belts back, we will not sit content in mediocrity. We will never cease to defend those belts. We will rise from the ashes of this defeat. And we will stand proud and tall, when the curtain closes.
Sum Guy: Well…you’re scaring me so….good luck with your match against MyMoving Company….I’m Sum Guy and I once got 2 strikes in a row at bowling!
*The Diamonds slowly walk out of the locker room in single file for their match. Sum Guy follows nervously.*
*cut to a PPV package*
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MrBRulzOK
Wade Wilson
Mr No-Pants Heathen
Something Witty Here.
Posts: 26,719
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Post by MrBRulzOK on Oct 7, 2008 0:11:40 GMT -5
We cut back to the ring, as we see Deuce and Domino standing by in the middle of the ring, jackets already off and looking ready for a scrap. The bell sounds, signaling the start of this upcoming match.
Announcer: The following tag team contest is scheduled for one fall! Currently in the ring, from The Other Side of the Tracks, at a combined weight of 465 pounds, Deuce and Domino!
The sounds of Gun by Gus Gus start up on the Toomitron, as the crowd begins booing especially loudly, expecting the arrival of the group known as Elite Perfection. However, as the music plays, nobody bothers to come out. Deuce and Domino seem a bit annoyed at this, as one of them shoves the announcer, not quite happy that nobody has shown up to face them. However, as they seem to be arguing, Domino gets a vicious chair to the back of the skull! The crowd boos angrily at this, as the man known as Chance Confidence stands over his prone body, giving a very serious look. Deuce turns around himself, looking particularly pissed off at this, as he aims a fist, Chance however quickly ducking under it, then delivering a second chair shot across his face! Deuce goes down hard, clutching the area, as Chance raises his weapon once again, cracking it viciously into Deuce's features, sending him rolling desperately out of the ring. Domino meanwhile starts to slowly rise to his feet, as Chance rears back, delivering a home run swing with his weapon right across his own face, sending him tumbling down to the mat, as well as busting open his forehead. Chance then calmly walks over, raising that chair high, then driving the top of it right across that gash, Domino looking on in horror, as he grasps at his forehead, quickly rolling outside of the ring. Chance looks to the crowd, a very serious look on his face, as he walks over to the center of the ring, sitting the chair in the middle of it, then taking a seat himself. He sits down slowly, crossing his legs and folding his arms, before reaching over and grabbing the announcer's microphone.
Chance: ... I'm afraid there will not be a match for us tonight... because these two don't deserve to be in the same ring as the entity known as Elite Perfection. Ratings could not be here tonight after his grueling ladder match with the likes of Spaz. Therefore, he asked me to take care of our match for this week. As you can all see, I have done just that.
Chance slowly turns his head, continuing to look on with a very different expression, face seemingly completely devoid of emotion.
Chance As most of you have probably heard by now, Sammy Stardust's was beaten quite badly at the hands of myself at the appropriately named Massacre. If you haven't heard, let me go ahead and do you a favor... take you back and help you relive what occurred on that fateful night for poor... Samuel. It was a night where history was made, D'zee and Vile clashed in an epic barbed wire ropes match up, with my good friend's associate coming out victorious...
The crowd boos rather loudly at this, Chance not seeming to acknowledge this.
Chance: Joe One's career was brought to a screeching halt at the hands of that good friend of mine, Sigma...
The crowd gives a rather mixed reaction here.
Chance: Spaz and my ally,Ratings, fought to a draw in an epic ladder match...
The crowd boos once again, as Chance continues.
Chance: And we saw the crowning of a new EWT Toolshed Champion, when the returning Psychoapeguy came back from wherever he spawned from and defeated nine other men to get his hands on that title.
The crowd gives a rather loud cheer for the EWT Legend, as Chance simply rolls his eyes.
Chance: But let us cut back to the beginning of that fateful night, before any of these previous events occurred. It was a simple No disqualification match, a bout where rules were completely thrown out the proverbial window. Where anything could and did go. Where a rather cocky underdog, coming into the EWT to make a name for himself after a tragedy where he lost the use of his arm, sought to silence the only man that was kind enough to show him what he truly was... a nobody.
The crowd boos this remark loudly, but then starts to cheer, as Domino manages to get back to his feet, only for Chance to get back up, grab that chair, and level him as he charges in almost instantly, sending the man down in a heap, as he follows with a second shot across the back of the head, before setting the chair back down and taking a seat once more.
Chance: A nobody that wanted to prove to the entire EWT that he had what it took to rise to the top of the this promotion. A man who wanted to overcome adversity and become one of the greats along such names as Limey, Hitmanmark, Maelstrom, Dorf, and even myself, Chance Confidence. A man that wanted to reach up and grab the brass ring in this business, to shatter the glass ceiling, and to stand atop as an icon in this business. A very noble goal indeed.
He pauses briefly.
Chance: However, this goal was unfortunately, well away from his grasp. Despite some impressive showings against various opponents, Samuel Stardust just couldn't seem to make a name for himself. Then, in one of the few highlights of his career, at the crappiest stage of them all, Samuel Stardust made a him for himself... and knocked out a former EWT Champion in Chance Confidence.
Chance seems to have a subtle angry look on his face as he says this.
Chance: A moment, that would shame the once proud champion, who only months ago, stood atop the plateau of the EWT at the top of it's ranks as the undisputed face of the promotion. I'll be honest, it ate me up inside. The mere thought of this young man being able to fell such a vibrant champion as myself made me absolutely sick to my stomach. So I did what all people should do when they have such a pest buzzing around their heads, I stomped him into the mat. With the help of my fellow associate Ratings, as well as my... loyal servant, this was a rather easy task.
Chance forms a bit of a small smirk on his face.
Chance: He was stupid enough to come back onto the same stage where he struck me down, only to have the tables turned on him. And thus, I thought that the feeling of shame would go away... but it didn't.
Chance's expression grows serious once again.
Chance: Beating down the vermin was not enough, no, what I had to do to finally get the thought of him out of my head was to beat him in the squared circle. And at the following event, No Rest for the Wicked, I had my first chance to face the little punk in the ring. However, once again, he managed to get another flukeish victory, despite my efforts, he felled me to the mat, then electrocuted a man to gain a victory in a very brutal match.As I laid on the mat, I gazed at him with utter contempt, once again overcome by rage as he celebrated this pathetic victory of his.
Once again, Chance starts to look quite angry, a bit more so this time.
Chance: That miserable one armed man... standing in triumph over someone who deserved it far more. And that brings us to Massacre once again. Samuel and I finally had our first one on one encounter, in this No Disqualification match. At first, he fought quite valiantly, catching me off guard and looking like he might just pull off the victory... only a fool would've thought that he would be successful though.
Chance's expression once again starts to grow quite proud.
Chance: Eventually, he made a mistake... and I was certain to capitalize. I targeted the body part that I thought deserved to be destroyed the most, his leg. At first, I resorted to simple but effective wrestling moves. Then I moved on, first with a Singapore Cane, then a steel chair, with a bit of assist from the steps at ringside, and of course, a set of brass knuckles, which I had thought of as platinum at the time. With each new level of punishment, the damage was established further still. Despite your attempts to fight back, it was not enough and in the end... I laid you out in the middle of that ring with my weapons of choice. Then I grabbed you by your precious leg, dragged you over toward those stairs once again, and with one valiant strike of my feet, against a chair I had gingerly wrapped around it, I shattered your dreams forever. And then, just to make you suffer even further, I grabbed you by your miserable leg and made sure to snap it completely into!
Chance forms a very satisfied sneer on his face now, as the crowd continues to boo quite loudly.
Chance: Samuel... you surely knew it was over by then. As I heard you scream to be let go, a feeling of bliss filled my head, as I basked in that glorious moment of your crippling pain, filling that miserable deformed body of your's and those tears of fear streaming down your face, surely you knew that it was over by then. At the end of that night... you were left with one arm... and one leg.
Chance gives a huge smile at this, a rather sick look in his eyes.
Chance: And that's when I realized... you had actually helped me out more than I could have ever imagined Samuel! You helped me realize that my previous attitude was not exactly fitting of a true champion. Up until then, I had always been the cocky, smarmy, irritating, arrogant, and overbearing little Englishman that I had been for my entire EWT career. Sure, it had offered some success, but eventually, I begin to realize that this arrogance of mine was clouding my judgment. It made me underestimate little shits like you... and it made me weak. Samuel, I want to thank you from the bottom of my heart, from that warm hospital bed you are lying in right now, with but one working arm and leg each, for helping me to see the light. Thanks to you... the old Chance Confidence is dead.
Chance slowly rises up from that chair now, then kicks it away. He forms a very serious face once again.
Chance: This is the end of those long drawn out speeches... this is the end of that sickening bragging... and this is the end of Chance Confidence looking like a joke! Let me tell you all right now, the time for laughing at me is over with! Spaz! Maelstrom! Mysth! Hensley! Especially you David Davies! I am headed to the top of this promotion once again and there is absolutely nobody that will be stopping me! As long as I stand here, in this very ring, as long as my heart beats, and as long as air flows through my very lungs, I will make it my mission in life to cripple each and every last one of you like I did to Sammy Stardust!
Chance slowly raises his arms into the air, as the crowd boos quite viciously.
Chance: I am Chance Confidence... and you can all call me... the CAREER KILLER!
The crowd boos relentlessly now, as Chance stands to his feet, folding his arms and simply standing in the ring, when suddenly, someone charges into the ring from behind... it's the Platinum Punisher!!! Chance looks at him with a calm expression, walking over and looking him in the masked face.
Chance: That means I don't have any more use for you...
Punisher simply looks at him and nods, before rearing back and punching him in the face! Chance goes down hard, as the crowd cheers, the young man quickly rolling out of the ring, as he looks on in with a very angry expression, eyes glaring right at the masked man, who starts to reach up, undoing that mask and pulling it off, revealing none other than...
PAUL PODANSKI.
Chance's eyes go wide, as he looks a bit more worried, the crowd cheering loudly, Paul having an absolutely furious look on his face, as he reaches down, grabbing that chair and charging toward Chance on the outside. The young man looks on in shock at this, quickly running up the ramp and to the backstage once again, as Paul Podanski continues to hold that chair, eyes full of fury, as he slams it against the steel ramp, before charging toward the backstage area himself, still wielding this weapon!
We almost immediately cut to commercial.
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Post by Toom E. Guci on Oct 7, 2008 0:29:48 GMT -5
*Todd Grisham is backstage & approaches Toom E Dangerously.*
Mr. Dangerously, sir...that was quite an announcement you made regarding the next EWT pay per view. But it would appear there is still some unfinished business from the last pay per view, remember?
Toom E: Do I remember? Do I remember? Of course I do. Do you take me for an idiot? Look at this great pay per view I just created & it's only going to get better. And you see, as far as I am concerned...there is NO #1 contender to the EWT Heavyweight Championship.
Todd: No #1 Contender? How could you have a pay per view without a #1 contender?
Toom E: See, who's the idiot now Todd? As I stated before, there is no championship matches slated for the next pay per view, so why should we worry about a #1 Contender? And that's why I have decided that at Rising Star, we will have ANOTHER @1 Contender's Match.
Todd: Really? After all that work both Spaz & Rationgs put their bodies through, you're not giving them a shot?
Toom E: Now, where did I not say they would get a chance? The thing is...they will get a chance. For you see, at Rising Star we will have ANOTHER first...the first ever First Blood Last Man Standing Match.
Todd: First Blood Last Standing Match? What exactly is that?
Toom E: It's simple, you idiot! You knock your opponent down for the 10 count per Last Man Standing Rules but your opponent can not be official knocked out unless he has drawn blood! So for Ratings to win, he must draw blood from Spaz then knock him out for the 10...and for Ratings to win, he must do the same to Spaz.
Todd: Really? That does sound interesting.
Toom E: You want interesting? This is defi9netly going to be a brutal match. And I don't dare put an EWT referee in harms way. Therefore, I am assigning former EWT Toolshed Champion Sigma as referee. Now if you'll excuse me, I have a meeting to attend.
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Post by Fred Fanatic on Oct 9, 2008 19:22:13 GMT -5
*After returning to a commercial, we are in a living room of a house. There is a couch. A really cheesy 8-bit video game theme plays in the background, as Fred Finger, the man who earlier seemed to have a rusty nails obsession, sits on the couch, and picks up a video game controller.
Fred: Hello, I'm Fred Finger. You met me earlier. And when I'm not looking for rusty nails, I'm doing the other thing I love to do, play crappy video games and bitch about them. Now today, I'm going to play EWT's latest video game, Crapamania.
*Fred holds up a video game box.
Fred: What is this crap? This is the worst excuse of a wrestling game I've ever seen? I mean, it looks pretty, but seriously, half the EWT match types aren't here. And talk about outdated roster! F***** worthless people like Alexa King are still on the roster. I mean, they might as well still have Gasoline as a s***** main eventer! Playing as all these old ******** ******s makes me want to ******* on some ***** with a side of ****** like **** pie on the **** forth of ******** July.
*Fred throws down the game controller, and begins to speka to someone off camera.
Fred: OK, this script is ******!
*A technical worker, most likely a director, comes on camera, and does not look very happy.
Director: CUT! What seems to be the problem?
*despite yelling cut, the camera still rolls.
Fred: This character! Its *******!!! Last week, I wanted to **** some nails, and now I play ******* video games? What the *****? This is nothing like the character I suggested.
Director: Well, we thought that wouldn't be as marketable as our idea.
Fred: This is your idea of marketable? Well it ******** stinks! How bout this? I, Freddie Fanatic, not Fred Finger, comes in next week, and maybe for a few weeks after, with some other guys deemed not marketable! And we'll show you ****** ****'s about marketable! F***!
*Fred storms off.
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Post by hardcorehensley on Oct 11, 2008 19:16:23 GMT -5
Lillian Garcia: Ladies and gentlemen, the following match is scheduled for one fall. Introducing first, already in his corner, from the Deep Blue Sea, weighing in at one hundred and eighty pounds...Shark Boy!
The camera switches from Garcia to Shark Boy who climbs up top, and does his shark fin taunt to multiple cheers. "Hit Em High, Hit Em Low" follows quickly.
Garcia: And his opponent, from Richmond, California, he weighed in this morning at approximately two hundred and fifty-two pounds...Hardcore Hensley!
Hensley bursts onto the scene unusually energetic, even for himself. He bobbles about, roaring and pounding his chest. He makes his way to the ring, slapping hands with most everybody down the aisle. He receives an exceptionally positive response for his manner, and he takes a moment to embrace a couple of ringside fans before climbing the steel steps into the ring. He doesn't head up top, instead going straight into his corner. As Garcia exits the ring, the referee checks both men over. Finally, he calls for the bell.
They rush one another to begin, locking horns. Hensley easily overpowers Shark Boy, sending him back into his respective corner. Hensley breaks the hold at the ref's order, and retreats back to the center of the ring. Shark Boy shakes himself off, and meets up with him again. Queerly, Shark Boy invites Hensley into a test of strength. Hensley stares blankly at his masked opponent, but Shark Boy urges him to accept. Hensley obliges, but Shark Boy catches him off-guard with a snapmare takeover. He follows up with a swift dropkick to the back of his head. Hensley sits dazed on the mat as Shark Boy bounds off for the ropes. He comes back for a short clothesline attempt. Hensley leans back, and avoids it though. He springs back up to his feet, and surprises Shark Boy with a sharp superkick that nearly decapitates the hero. Hensley doesn't so much as think about going for a cover, and yanks him back up to his feet. He Irish whips him across the ring, but Shark Boy evades an elbow on his return. He comes back trying for another clothesline of his own, but Hensley ducks under his arm, and hoists him up for a sideslam of sorts. Shark Boy swings around his body though, and ends up with Hensley in a crucifix position. Valiantly, he tries to pull his body weight backwards, but Hensley's having none of it. He pulls Shark Boy back around in front of him, and while still in midair, plants him with a rough spinebuster. The audience pops nicely, and Hensley gets up hyped. He sets up his opposition towards the center of the ring, and scales the top rope. He measures him then sticks a perfect frog splash. After maybe a second of selling, he hooks his leg.
1...
2...
3!
"Hit Em High, Hit Em Low" replays.
Garcia: Your winner...Hardcore Hensley!
The ref raises Hensley's arm in victory as he celebrates momentarily. Shark Boy has his face in his hands, but Hensley helps him up. They shake hands, and Hensley raises Shark Boy's arm as well. Hensley leaves Shark Boy to recover himself while he retires to the back. A promo for Rising Star comes next.
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Sigma: Current SRW Champ!
Dennis Stamp
Writes about wrestling, does videos about game shows, helps transpeople, loves baseball etc.
Posts: 4,525
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Post by Sigma: Current SRW Champ! on Oct 12, 2008 1:32:59 GMT -5
*Sigma barges into Toomi's office*
Toom E. Dangerously: Sigma, what in the hell are you doing in here?
Sigma: I have a serious bone of contention. I just got rid of one of your biggest headaches in Joe One, which should give me an automatic World Heavyweight Title shot. But instead, you reward me for my hard work in this organization by giving me a striped shirt and refereeing a match on the PPV? I don't know about you, but to me that's a gigantic waste of one of the best talents that you have left.
Toom E. Dangerously: Listen, Sigma. I don't have the time to deal with you. I'm trying to figure out waht to do about this mess. If I was you, I would suck it up and deal with it. Remember, I put you in as a security measure because I don't want any of my referees to get hurt.
Sigma: I'm in there only because your referees are too scared to work in that match? What kind of a jackass do you think I am. I'm starting to think that you and Joe One were in cahoots. Now that I got rid of him, you can't seal the deal you had with him anymore. And now that Minipax is gone, you didn't complete the deal.
Toomi: HOW DARE YOU ACCUSE ME OF BEING IN CAHOOTS WITH THAT MEGALOMANIAC! NOW, YOU'RE GOING TO WORK THIS MATCH AS THE SPECIAL GUEST REFEREE, OTHERWISE YOU CAN SEE YOURSELF OUT OF EWT FOR GOOD! NOW DO YOU GOT ME, SIGMA?
Sigma: I knew it, you were in cahoots with Joe One. It's written in your eyes. Now, I'll bow out gracefully for now. But if you're not careful, you can see yourself immediately next to your good buddy Joe One and the rest of Minipax in the Emergency Ward.
Toomi: GET OUT!!!! I MEAN IT!!!!
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Ass Dan
King Koopa
Curious about extra lines
Have you seen me?
Posts: 12,259
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Post by Ass Dan on Oct 13, 2008 0:32:36 GMT -5
*Suddenly, the screen turns white. It fades back in to show Joe One and Richard Clay stading in a brightly lit office.*
One: Excuse my tardiness with this statement, but I have had many things to work with. It seems that I have been forcibly removed from the Extreme Wrestlecrap Threaderation. Mr. Williams? Congratulations on being a coward. Your walking out on the steel cage match only cements your status as a prole. You will never amount to anything in the EWT, let alone match my World Championship.
One: I understand that I am no longer with the company, and with my associates' injuries, it would appear to the untrained eye that Minipax is dead. Let me assure you, viewers, that Minipax is not dead. Minipax will never die. Minipax will return, stronger than ever, when we regroup. Then, I will finally complete my Nine Orders without Mr. Williams' interferance. Do you know why?
*He holds up the BR.*
One: I still have this. This book has shown me many truths, but there are many I sill have yet to understand. It is the reason why I was never pinned, or forced to surrender in any match I was in. As long as this book is in my hands, I shall continue. I will never die.
*One opens up the BR away from the camera to read. Clay steps ahead.*
Clay: And let me tell you something. Just because I've been injured doesn't mean I'm down. I'm going to be back in the ring in a few months, so you'd better watch your back, Sigma.
*Joe One pulls out a dagger from inside the book and stabs the Killionare in the back, One shoving a towl in Clay's mouth. One's face shows no signs of remorce as Clay's eyes widen.*
One: Turn off the camera.
Off-stage voice: What?
One: Turn off the camera!
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MrBRulzOK
Wade Wilson
Mr No-Pants Heathen
Something Witty Here.
Posts: 26,719
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Post by MrBRulzOK on Oct 13, 2008 22:13:30 GMT -5
As we see Jamie Noble standing by in the ring, bouncing back and forth, looking quite pumped for this upcoming match. He starts rolling his neck a bit, as well as checking his wrists, the bell sounding for this next match.
Announcer: The following contest is scheduled for one fall! Currently in the ring, from Hanover, West Virginia, weighing in at 202 pounds, Jamie Noble!
The crowd gives Jamie a rather nice pop, as they await his opponent. They don't have to wait long, as the familiar Bodies picks up on the Toomitron, as the crowd explodes in cheers, the founder of the EWT Toolshed Division and self proclaimed Drunken Demon stepping out from the backstage! Clad in a pair of deep blue tights, with the initials "P.P" written across the back in a deep red. He holds up a familiar sack of toys and grins widely, swinging it overhead to the delight of the fans, before slinging it once again over his shoulder and stomping towards the ring.
Announcer: And from Birmingham Alabama, weighing in at a total of 299 pounds, he is the Drunken Demon and a two time Toolshed Champion, Paul Podanski!
Paul stops at the apron, as he gives Noble a huge grin, before setting down his bag of toys, then quickly sliding into the ring, as Noble immediately go after him, charging and hitting him with a low dropkick to the head! Paul grasps his head slightly, as Noble yanks him up to his feet, delivering a few quick forearms, before sending him off the ropes, then charging with a leg lariat. Paul however catches him by the leg, turning the move into a flapjack! Jamie Noble bounces hard face first off the mat, rising to his feet, as Paul takes him down with a stiff fist to the face! He groans, rising back up once again, just in time to get a quick series of punches, sending him staggering back against the ropes himself. as Paul quickly whips him off, then charges as he comes back, taking him down with a Lou Thez press, immediately raining fists down across Noble's face! The West Virginian quickly rolls off to the side, as Paul follows with a quick elbow drop across the face, before going for a cover. 1....2...
Noble kicks out. Paul quickly pulls him to his feet, only to get a shoulder block, hunching him over, as Noble quickly unleashes a quick series of forearms, sending him staggering back slightly. He follows with a knee to the gut, doubling Paul over again, then following with a quick series of clubs to the neck. Paul goes down on all fours, as Noble quickly bounces off the ropes, coming back with a low dropkick to the face! Paul goes down, clutching it, as Noble makes a quick cover. 1....2...
Paul powers out! Noble lands hard, rising to his feet, as he quickly grabs Paul as he rises back up, looking for a swinging neck breaker, Paul however pushing him off in mid move, Noble however ducking as he comes back, rolling past, then following up with a quick chop block to the leg, sending Paul down to a knee! Noble quickly grabs on and starts working a rather tight chin lock, as Paul struggles a bit, Noble quickly wrapping his legs around Paul's chest, as he hangs on tight, trying to squeeze the air out of the bigger man. Podanski however fights to keep in this match, wriggling desperately and trying to shake Jamie off. Eventually he pushes to his feet, then charge back, driving Noble back into the turnbuckle! He then backs up again, before charging and sandwiching him between there again! Noble's grip loosen, as Paul then reaches back, snapping him off his neck with a thud, as he grasps his neck slightly. Noble pushes back to his feet, just in time to get scooped up and nailed with a Inverted Atomic Drop, as the crowd cheers, Noble gasping in pain, Paul following by coming off the ropes, then hitting a huge clothesline, turning Noble inside out! Noble grasps at his neck, as Paul cuts his throat, then heading over to the nearby turnbuckle, springing onto the second rope, then coming off with a flying leg drop! Noble grasps his neck further as it connects, as Paul grins, then hooks the leg. 1....2....
Noble gets a shoulder up. He looks a bit impressed at this, as he quickly pulls Noble up, setting him up for the Paulerbomb, only for Noble to quickly maneuver behind, countering into a crucifix pin! 1....2....
Paul escapes! Noble looks quite frustrated with this, as he quickly grabs Paul around the waist as he rises back up, trying to take him up for a German Suplex! Paul however counters with... his weight, as he shakes his head, then quickly elbows out. Noble stumbles back, then charges forward, ducking under Paul again, then coming back with a cross body, only to get caught, as Paul quickly spins around, launching him overheard with a Fall Away Slam! Jamie lands hard, grasping his back, as Paul quickly rises back up, grasping slightly at his neck again, then snatching Noble up once again as he rises, quickly spinning around and hitting him with the infamous Paulerbomb! Noble hits the mat with a thud, as Paul covers him. 1....2....3!
And despite a strong showing, Paul is victorious in this one.
Announcer: Here is your winner... Paul Podanski!
Paul rises to his feet, getting a nice pop from the crowd once again, as he walks over, snatching the microphone from the announcer, as Paul's expression grows more serious.
Paul: As much as I'd love to be happy to be back here in the EWT... after nearly having my career ended by one of the toughest opponents I've ever faced, I'm not gonna lie to you people. This is not how I wanted to make my comeback. Not at all!
Paul's face grows a bit annoyed.
Paul: I'm sure you folks all saw what happened to Massacre to that up and comer, Sammy Stardust. I saw that kid and to me, he had EWT Champion potential. Hell, I'm a fat ass brawler and I did pretty well for myself, just imagine what that kid could have accomplished! Hell, he even helped his team win in that whole EWT Chamber of Horrors!
The crowd gives this a rather nice pop.
Paul: Hey, maybe not the best of accomplishments, but how about this... he knocked out a former EWT Champion... sure, it was the worst EWT Champion in history, as well as one of the worst Tri-State AND Tool-shed champs as well. The fact is though is that he busted that braggart's mouth wide open... and for that, you have to respect the man.
The crowd cheers in agreement, as Paul flashes a bit of a smile.
Paul: Hell... I was there myself. And that brings me to something else, the late Platinum Punisher. Yeah... I know, probably not too much of a surprise, I mean the last time I came back, it was also under a mask. I guess at this point I'd be known as... the man who comes back under a masked gimmick. First, Smiley Sal... or was it Happy Hal? Then most recently... the Platinum Punisher.
The crowd boos the mention of both these past gimmicks, obviously not big fans.
Paul: But you see... that comeback of mine, well you thank the so called CAREER KILLER for that.
The booing becomes even louder at this mention.
Paul: Chance Confidence... you are absolutely sick. What you did to that young man in that match, which I was FORCED to watch... made me want to vomit! The fact that you, the slimiest of the slime balls. had the gall to break a man's leg into... just because he humiliated you, which by the way was your own damn fault in the first place, makes me absolutely sick! That's why I came back... because I could not stand idly by and let you get away with possibly ending a young man's career just like that. If it wasn't for you, who knows... Sammy Stardust could have probably challenge for any title that he wanted! Unfortunately, we'll never know, because you had to be such a damn coward about it. You had to make him pay, because he made you look like the joke that you really are.
Paul forms a very pissed off expression on his face.
Paul: That's why I went to Toomi personally and asked for this match. Because somebody here in EWT needs to teach you a damn lesson in respect. You think just because you're a former EWT Champion that you're better than everyone?! Well let me tell you something, as far as I'm concerned, you never deserved any of those titles you earned whatsoever! In fact, you don't even deserve to be here in EWT, because despite all that talent of your's, the truth of the matter is you don't give these fans any damn respect! You and that whole Elite Perfection group... you're nothing more then parasites on the EWT, sucking the life out of it between your three swollen egos and slowly suffocating it to death.
The crowd cheers, obviously in agreement with this.
Paul: My good buddy Spaz is already dealing with Ratings, probably Sigma too as well, so that just leaves you all by your lonesome Chance. Your Platinum Punisher, he's gone. Of course, that's alright isn't it, after all... you said you didn't need him. Well the fact of the matter is, he doesn't need you either. Nobody here in EWT needs you... and at Rising Star, I'm going to break your damn neck! Then we'll see how you like having your career...
As Paul is about to finish, the Toomitron lights up, as the crowd boos loudly, a rather Stern Chance Confidence appearing on the screen, simply gazing back down at Paul in the ring.
Chance: That's enough out of you.
Paul simply glares back up at Chance on the Toomitron screen.
Paul: You can't shut me up!
Chance: Paul... Paul... Paul. As I seem to recall, you actually came to me and ASKED for help, did you not?
Paul's expression grows a bit less angry now.
Chance: Yes that's right, I helped you out. If you do recall, I said that my Platinum Punisher was a hobo, a homeless man, a street urchin, and a panhandler. You see, the man that stands before you was indeed... what I say he is.
Paul: ...
Chance: In fact, I even remember the day that you called me up, on a pay phone of all things. It appears that... there was an unfortunate fire, which consumed your house and all of your belongings. You said to me that it was so sudden, that you had no idea what to do. Everything that you treasured and cherished... it all went up in flames.
Chance gives a subtle smirk as he speaks.
Chance: So you called me, because I was the only one that could help you. Everyone of your so called friends, even your own supposed cousin and mother, none of them wanted to take you in, because of your so called... demons. The fact that you were fat, lazy, and goo for nothing probably didn't help matters either.
Paul simply continues glaring right at Chance on the screen.
Chance: The worst part of it all was... you still weren't cleared to make a return to the ring, so you couldn't even do the one thing that brought you joy in life. You tried to get all sorts of doctors for second, third, and even fiftieth opinions, but they all said the same thing.
Paul rubs his forehead slightly, as the crowd listens quietly.
Chance: And thus, we came to an agreement. As long as you worked under me, not only would I pay you a small amount of my personal wealth, but I would allow you to stay with me in my rather lavish home as well. It was more then generous of me... and the only reason I did it, well, I just like controlling miserable little pests like yourself. It wasn't out of compassion or pity, I simply wanted to make you do whatever I wanted. The best part of it being... you couldn't do a thing about it, because the minute that you betrayed me, well, then you're back on the streets, like you should've been in the first place.
Paul starts to look especially angry at this.
Paul: You know what... looking back on it, I SHOULD HAVE NEVER ACCEPTED YOUR OFFER! I would rather die on the streets, then live forever if I had to serve someone like you!
The crowd cheers, as chance simply gives a bemused smile.
Chance: Well, it's too late my former servant, because you made that choice already. And now that you've broken our agreement, the deal is off. It was fun while it lasted, but to be honest, I've grown sick of being charitable anyway. So as far am I'm concerned, you can go drop dead in an alley.
Paul looks at him, but then shakes his head.
Paul: Actually... thanks to that funding of your's, I found myself a place to stay. So you can just forget about that.
Chance: Good for you... I hope it burns down as well. Besides... you shouldn't even be in that ring right now. After all, you still haven't been medically cleared. So I suppose you'll just have to wait on getting your revenge on me for now.
Paul gives a smirk.
Paul: Oh no Chance... that's not the case at all. You see, earlier this week, I paid a visit to the doctors office and guess what? I'm once again cleared to wrestle in this ring!
Chance's eyes go wide.
Paul: Yep, I finally healed up from my last injury and coincidentally enough, it happened to be around the time that you ended that young man's career. So I figured it was the perfect time to stop what I was doing... and now, I only have one thing on my mind.
Paul gives a very pissed off look.
Paul: Beating the holy hell out of the so called career killer! Chance, I am going to make you pay for all of your misdeeds once and for all! At Rising Star, there will indeed be a career ended!
The crowd cheers, as Chance looks down with an unimpressed expression.
Chance: Strong words. Well, you are right about one thing. At Rising Star... a career will end. I'm afraid it will be your's though.
Paul gazes back up at Chance with a very determined look on his own face.
Chance: By the way, I'd bring that mask with you. After I get done, you'll be needing it. Since I doubt you'll ever want to show your pathetic face around here again.
Chance gives a rather sly smirk, as the screen clicks off soon after, the crowd booing quite loudly in the background, as Paul simply stands in the ring, now glaring intently at that blank screen.
We quickly fade to a commercial.
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Maelstrom
AC Slater
The Tide Will Turn!
Posts: 236
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Post by Maelstrom on Oct 14, 2008 14:47:33 GMT -5
We are backstage and Maelstrom is standing by the Match board, he reads down to his name.
MAELSTROM: Hmm ... Abyss
Sum Guy pops up from behind a pillar
SUM GUY: Hi I'm Sum Guy and I've been watching Heroes!
Sum Guy walks over to Maelstrom
SUM GUY: Hi, you excited about your match?
MAELSTROM: Not really Sum, it will be easy. Last time I met Abyss I threw him in a large tank of electric eels, so he might be angry but he's no threat.
SUM GUY: Well what about the current thorn in your side Mysth?
MAELSTROM: That prawn of a punk! He keeps getting in my way. I should be challenging Dave Davies for the Heavyweight Title, right now or competing for that Million dollar prize money. Instead I have Misty here, popping up where he isn't wanted
SUM GUY: But ... he beat you?
Maelstrom who had been all smiles frowns, Sum Guy winces as if he might be hit in the face
MAELSTROM: He beat me once Sum, I'll admit he has some skill Sum, but I had already competed that night and he was a surprise opponent. On a normal day I'd have Mysth down and out for the 3 count and pinfall easy. Look at what I did in that recent brawl at the ppv, I had him where I wanted and then got sidetracked by some Irish people.
SUM GUY: You didn't win again, though.
MAELSTROM: You are looking to be hurt Sum aren't you?
Maelstrom raises his fist, Sum guy suddenly changes his look to that of utter concentration with his eyes closed. Maelstrom pauses, after a few seconds Sum opens them again. Sum looks at the paused Maelstrom
SUM GUY: I did it!! I'm like Hiro I froze time!!! I have superpowers!
Maelstrom continues his punch
SUM GUY: oh ...
Sum Guy goes flying, as a grumpy Maelstrom walks off
(fade out)
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Post by The Bad Man on Oct 14, 2008 15:12:37 GMT -5
VOICE OVER: It's now time for the Bad Man Hungry Moment with your favorite sadistic tri-state fat man ... The Bad man
*We open to find ourselves in a murky dilapidated room in a wooden house. In the room there is a chair and a big sack full of mail. Sitting on the chair is The Bad Man who has the Tri-State title on his shoulders. His girth visible for all to see as he paws over a letter. He then tears it open with his teeth and reads the letter. We meanwhile get a small window box open in the corner with a serious man in a suit who tells us the question.*
SERIOUS MAN IN A SUIT: Dear Bad Man, I'm a big time fan of EWT and you, can you please tell me what you think of your challenger this week, The Animal: Batista?
*The window box vanishes*
BAD MAN (Raspy, gurgling style voice): Animal? flheh heh! I eat animals, there blood gravy run down my lips. Flhehe this Batista will be my first victim flheh, flhe flheh!
*Bad Man then scoffs the letter in his mouth, chews and swallows, he then waddles off into a dakrer part of the murky room laughing his horrible raspy gurgling laugh*
BAD MAN: flheh, flheh, flheh flheh.
VOICE OVER: That was your BAD MAN HUNGRY MOMENT tune in next time when the Bad Man will give us more insight into his inner mind!
(Cut to strobe lighting!)
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Sigma: Current SRW Champ!
Dennis Stamp
Writes about wrestling, does videos about game shows, helps transpeople, loves baseball etc.
Posts: 4,525
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Post by Sigma: Current SRW Champ! on Oct 17, 2008 1:11:25 GMT -5
(Bell rings)
GMC: Ladies and gentlemen, our next contest is scheduled for one fall. Making his way into the ring: From Chicago, Illinois; Scotty Goldman.
Tony Schiavone: The young and charismatic Scotty Goldman is in the ring right now. He could be well on his way to being big in EWT.
Jesse Ventura: Yeah, he’s got the energy and he’s got the talent to back up his claim, but he doesn’t want to be on Sigma’s bad side.
Tony Schiavone: We got some words from Scotty Goldman and here’s what he has to say.
Scotty Goldman: Scotty Goldman here, and I’m facing Sigma. What is this guy, looking like some video game character came to life? Well, I’m not worried, my X-buster will take care of him in no time.
Tony Schiavone: Seems quite keen to get on with this.
Jesse Ventura: If he wants action, then Sigma would more than likely ablige.
(“Feel a Fear” plays, crowd boos)
GMC: And his opponent, hailing from Tacoma, Washington: SIGMA.
Tony Schiavone: You can see the scars all over the upper body of Sigma after that hellacious battle against Joe One. Sigma escaped that battle with his career intact whereas Joe One is gone.
Jesse Ventura: That shows the tenacity and viciousness that Sigma has. He could put the screws to ya and beat you down at any given moment.
(Bell Rings)
Tony Schiavone: There’s the bell and we’re underway. Sigma immediately starts off with a stiff right hand to Goldman. Goldman dazed and confused, runs right into a stiff lariat from Sigma.
Jesse Ventura: Well, Scotty Goldman is a goofball anyways, so it could have been for show. Sigma, not relenting one bit, with some stiff Elbowdrops to the back and follows it up by picking him up and giving him a Russian leg sweep.
Tony Schiavone: Sigma, is pulling out all the stops against Scotty Goldman. He must be furious about not being booked for action in the Rising Star Match.
Jesse Ventura: Sigma deserves a World Title shot, but Toomi wants to do a power play and stifle Sigma’s path. Now look at Sigma, just slapping Scotty Goldman around like he’s nothing. He’s sending a message to the people in the back with the belts. He’s ready for them.
Tony Schiavone: He most certainly is as Sigma is giving the high sign for the Sigma Suplex. He’s got him hooked, he’s got him up and he just plants Scotty Goldman down to the canvas with that Sigma Suplex.
Jesse Ventura: Well, Scotty Goldman had no chance after making those pre-match comments about the X-Buster.
Tony Schiavone: Ref has the cover here.
Ref: 1……2……..3!
(Bell Rings)
GMC: Ladies and Gentlemen, your winner: Sigma.
Tony Schiavone: Sigma is your winner and he’s calling for the microphone.
Jesse Ventura: Everybody should listen in to this guy.
Sigma: So, it seems that Toomi wants to hamstring me along and play babysitter to Ratings and Spaz in their Ladder Match for the #1 Contendership. How fitting, I always seem to play babysitter around here. Babysitting Shane Malone’s Toolshed Title reign before taking it away, not to mention the biggest bunch of infants this organization has ever seen, Minipax: The Ministry of Peace. Or should I say: pieces. And now Joe One wants to vex me by murdering “The Killionaire” and saying that I won’t win the World Title. Well, Joe Zero, your vexes won’t matter. I will take care of that infidel Dave Davies, and take that World Title. Because I am the Alpha and the Omega, the Beginning and the End. So it is written, so it shall come to pass. Sigma is the Past, present and Future of wrestling.
(Cut to Commercial)
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Unicron
Aunt Blabby Tells All.
bea wants all you sweathogs to take a look at what a REAL man is supposed to look like
Posts: 3,223
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Post by ape on Oct 21, 2008 13:09:54 GMT -5
*we come back from commercial with terry funk in the ring awaiting the ewt toolshed champion, psychoapeguy. funk has his focus on the entranceway while psychoapeguy slithers out from under the ring and creeps under the bottom rope...crawling on the apron towards the ring veteran.
before the funker knows what's going on, ape grabs his leg and begins to chew through the tights and it doesn't take long before blood begins pouring out of the funker's calf. funk screams and uses his other leg to stomp ape off. funk clutches his bleeding calf then looks at ape and screams out some angry, vulgar words. as he gets closer to ape, he walks into a drop toe hold with ape floating over and turning it into a single-leg crab. while he's got funks leg, he begins to bite the same calf again...only stopping now and then to look up and giggle before going back to make it bleed more.
after about a minute, terry funk makes it to the ropes and psychoapeguy is forced to let go...but only after waiting until the referee get to four in his five count. after releasing the hold, the ref lectured ape for a few seconds....after the lecture, ape goes back in for the kill on the funker, but funk uses all of his strength to kick psychoapeguy in the groin as he gets near him.
ape drops to the canvas and terry funk slowly makes his way over for a cover. 1.......2........kickout.
with ape still down, terry funk grabs psychoapeguy's leg and begins to apply his spinning toe hold. ape screams in pain as funk takes the time to return the favor and bite ape's leg every now and then as he applies the hold. funk spins with the hold again and bends down one more time to bite the leg, but when he does, ape reaches up and turns it into a small package. 1.......2........3.
the bell rings and the referee waits for ape to release the small package to raise his hand....but instead of releasing the hold, ape continues to hold it as you hear terry funk begin to scream. ape has begun to gnaw on funk's leg again while in the small package and is refusing to let go.
ewt medics and officials rush into the ring to try and pry ape off, but ape refuses to let go. after a few minutes of officials trying to pull the two apart, ape finally lets go. the officials immediately back off upon seeing ape's face. he's got a large section of fabric from terry funk's tights in his mouth and from his nose down, he's just dripping with blood. after a few seconds, ape starts to giggle and laugh...and as he does so, the fabric gently floats from his mouth, down to the canvas.
medics pull terry funk out of the ring. the whole time, funk is swinging and screaming that he's not done with ape yet. psychoapeguy smiles as he watches...and then slowly slithers under the ring ropes and makes his way to the back as we go to a commercial break.*
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