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Post by DSR on Oct 13, 2005 16:43:04 GMT -5
*DSR is seen walking around backstage, with bandaging on his midsection and shoulder.
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B.A.
Grimlock
Posts: 13,335
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Post by B.A. on Oct 13, 2005 17:54:14 GMT -5
Eddie is backstage putting his kneepads on. He knows if he doesnt at least win two matches, then he wont be in good standing....
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Deamon Cohln
Don Corleone
AND THAT'S THE GODDAMN TRUTH!
Posts: 1,962
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Post by Deamon Cohln on Oct 13, 2005 18:40:15 GMT -5
*The camera fades into the ring where Papa Shangos music is already playing and he is facing the ramp. The Announcer is next to to him with a microphone*
Announcer: The match is a Tables match and will end when one of the competetors is put through a table. Now in the ring Papa Shango!*The crowd does not seem so entusiastic.*
*ICP's Halls of Illusion hits and the fans take notice. The look to the ramp to see Deamon jump out.*
Match: Papa Shango v. Deamon Cohln (Tables Match)
*Deamon comes from behind Shango and cracks him ver the head with a chair. Even the ref is suprised and falls on the ropes. Deamon drops the chair and begins delivering arms to the chest of Shango as he tries to escape. Papa tries to get a punch off but Deamon ducks and delivers a brutal kick to the chin of Shango. He gets out of the ring and looks for something under the ring to use. He sees a board sitting on a table and a ladder. He pulls out the table and saves it for later. He grabs the peice of woods and stands up but is meet by a baseball slide to his chest. Shango is now kicking him in the chest to keep him down so he can find his own weapon. He goes to the other side of the ring and grabs a chair from the announcer. He walks to the other side is meet by a board to the lower stomach. They are both on the ground now and Deamon is crawling to the corne turnbuckle to get himself propped up. He crawls and hoists himself up with the turnbuckle, unaware that Shango is behind him with a chair. Shango hits him twice in the back before Deamon kicks out his knee. Deamon gets up and limps over to the board that he dropped. He grabs it and stands over by Shango, waiting for him to get up. Shango finally rises and Deamon breaks (literally) it over his head. Shango is all but knocked out. Deamon walks over to the table and throws it into the ring. He gets in and looks at the crowd and points to his head as if he has a idea. He walks to the other side of the ring and grabs another table. He throws that in and then enters himself. Shango is beginning to get up as Deamon stacks two tables on top of each other Shango climbs into the ring not knowing his fate. Deamon suprisingly picks him up and manages to get him on the top table. Deamon runs to the ladder on the side of the ring and throws it into the ring. He sets the ladder up near the corner and starts to climb saluting the crowd with every step. Shango somehow gets over to Deamon and sends a fist into his lower back. Deamon then deliver a kick to the top of Shango's head as he fals back off the ladder. Deamon looks around as the crowd gets excited at what might happen. He climbs to the top and salutes the crowd with his own hand signals and Moonsaults off the ladder and hits Shango. He the sets a Table up in the center of the ring and sets Shango on it. He climbs the ladder again and 900 flips off of it putting shango through the table winning the match. The crowd goes nuts as Deamon grabs a mic from the announcer. He leans on the rope facing the camera and adresses the crowd.*
Deamon: How'd ya'll like that one! Last week I beat Ultimo Dragon and showed my technical skills. This week I show ya'll I can be as hardcore as anybody. I am just the best new guy around here and ya'll can't debate that much. I give this guy some credit he did hurt me a little.*Deamon waits a little to hear the crowd reaction.* But still that was one hell of a finish wasn't it! Now today I begin my acsent. Maybe one day, I can be the top. AND THAT'S THE GODAMN TRUTH!
*Deamon's music hit as he walks out of the ring. The EWT logo flashs and the commercials begin.*
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B.A.
Grimlock
Posts: 13,335
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Post by B.A. on Oct 13, 2005 19:00:41 GMT -5
Bell rings.
Lillain: *The following is the first match out of five for the OX TITLE!!!! Crowd cheers..
Lillain: On the way to the ring....
*Party Starter begins to play
Lillain: Spazzz!!!!!
Crowd cheers loudly
King: Well, what do you think here coach? Coach:You know, it can go either way, i dont know what can happen. I just know its gonna be a good match.
Remedy starts blasting over the arena. Crowd boos Lillian: And on the way to the ring, the ox division champion... Eddie Omega!
Eddie goes ahead and steps on the ring apron and looks to the crowd. Spaz runs and hits him off the apron.
Coach: Oh would you look at that cheap shot!
Spaz goes to the outside and begins to chase eddie around the ring. Eddie rolls into the ring, and Spaz gets in. Eddie stomps Spaz and picks him and does an irish whip into the rope. Eddie goes for a clothseline but Spaz ducks, hits the ropes and flies into eddie for a cross body. Crowd cheers Eddie rolls out the ring to get his composure. The ref wants eddie to get in the ring and he starts to count. Ref: 1.....2......3....
Eddie gets back into the ring and both men go for a collar elbow tie up. Eddie pushes Spaz into the corner because of sheer weight advantage and knees him.
King: If i were eddie, id try to soften him immediately, finish the match as quick as possible.
Eddie goes ahead and goes for the Pledges. But misses and hits his shin and is in pain. Spaz sees this and kicks his leg out from him. He tries to go for the Sydney Cloverleaf, but Eddie squirms to the ropes. Ref calls for a break and Eddie gets up and tries to shake off the pain. Collar elbow tie up, and both men are struggling this time. But Spaz punches him in the stomach. He hooks him for a suplex and slams eddie.
Coach :Thats raw strength right there...
Spaz goes for a count Ref: 1....2...
Eddie kicks out and spaz goes for a sleeper. Eddie puts his arms out trying to stay awake. He gets to his knees and picks spaz up mid air. He looks like hes about to drop him on the outside but comes back in the ring and slams him. He sets him up for pi kappa slappa, as he slaps his chest, kicks the back and runs into the ropes for a back splash. Eddie looks to be getting support by people from the crowd and looks to that section. People on the other side are chanting Spaz and its a war in the stand. Eddie picks him up and wants to end it. He tries to punche Spaz but misses, and spaz hooks him.
Coach: Here it comes, those rolling german suplexs Spaz lifts him up for a german suplex, and slams him. But hes not done. He goes for another one, and slams Eddie. This time, instead of rolling and slamming eddie, he picks him up and slams his head on the bottom turnbuckle.
Coach: Oh MY GOD, did you see eddies head? King: OH wow, thats not good.
The replay shows it shows eddies neck getting a hit pretty bad by the turnbuckle.
Spaz smells blood, and wants to end it. He picks eddie up and as eddie seems helpless, he gets enough strength and hits Spaz in the head. Eddie holding his neck, goes for a kick, Spaz catches it and kicks eddie this time. Eddie doubles over and Spaz calls for the shockwave...
Crowd cheers insanely...
But eddie doesnt care for the match, he knows his title is safe barring 3 more matches, and low blows Spaz so blantantly, the ref calls for the bell
King: Oh cmon, he knew it was over.
Spaz is in pain holding his crotch. Eddie goes to the ref and snatchs his title.
Lillain: And heres your winner.... by disqualification... Spaz!!!
Eddie looks at lillain, and walks fast over to her. He takes the mic as lillian runs out of his way.
Eddie: You listen up Spaz..*winces in pain from neck* this isnt over!! I couldve won!! *crowd boos*
It isnt over by any means!! Theres still 4 matches left!! And I proved that Im the dominant person."
Crowd boos, as Eddie looks around and walks backstage.
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Post by The Lach is very tired on Oct 14, 2005 4:12:51 GMT -5
*Spaz is sitting backstage holding an icepack on his family jewels.*
S: Eddie, you made the biggest mistake of your life. I am up 1-0 & I'm pissed, be warned Eddie I will not take this lying down. Soon you will be down 2-0 & then you will be the Former EWT OX Division Champion.
*Cut To Commercial.*
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Limey
Unicron
It's been awhile.
Posts: 3,062
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Post by Limey on Oct 14, 2005 5:58:11 GMT -5
*Tony Chimel comes out to announce the very special match ahead.*
TC: Ladies and gentlemen, the following is scheduled for one-fall. I don't know why I keep saying that, as it's kind of redundant.
*Metallica's "I disappear" plays, as Mistress Mia comes out. She raises her hands to mixed responses.*
TC: Introducing first, from Cleveland Ohio...MISTRESS MIA!!!
*Mia gets into the ring, and grabs the stick.*
Mia: So, I'm looking on the matchboard, and guess my surprise when I find out who I'm against. Carla O Woe. [Sarcasm] Wow. [/sarcasm] You know, you may have been training reeeeaaaaal hard to try and win that GND championship, but honey...don't forget who you're facing. I defeat female wrestling legends in mere seconds. You can barely hold your own against Nicole Bass. Just remember that. No-one is going to stop me on the way to the top. Not you, not that wannabe Oceanic....
*A good crowd response at Oceanic's name*
Mia: SHUT UP!! And definately not Linda Ragnal. Why SHE was chosen instead of me, I just can't understand. And Carla? After this match, neither will you.
*Mia throws down the stick. Tony Chimel sheepishly retreives it. "She's got Issues", and Carla O Woe is out.*
TC: Aaaaand her opponent, from....
*Carla is already in the ring. She throws up the horns to a good pop as the bell rings.
Mia immediately charges at Carla, ducks a clothesline, making it behind Carla, and then quickly applies a rolling prawn pin, smiling triumphantly and counting with the ref.
1, 2...
Carla kicks out. Mia is stunned by this, annoyed that she's not beating Oceanic's record for finishing a match.
Mia walks over to Carla, and shoves her. Carla takes it in her stride, laughs at it, and then casually shoves Mia back. Mia and Carla then get close and trash talk each other, ending with Mia raking the eyes of Carla. Carla stumbles around, and walks right back into Mia, who hits a belly-to-belly suplex. Carla lands on her feet, bounces off the ropes, and tries a jumping lariat onto Mia. Mia counters with an armdrag, but Carla gets to her feet and hits Mia with an armdrag of her own. Mia gets to her feet, and both women hit dropkicks to each other at the same time, prompting them both to land on their knees, staring at the other as the crowd cheers for both atheletes.
Carla and Mia both get up, and circle each other. Mia extends her hand for Carla to shake. The crowd get iffy at this, and Carla looks to consider it, weighing out the options. Mia persists, in the style of Alex Shelley, putting one hand behind her back. Carla eventually accepts, shaking Mia's hand for just a second before getting back, getting both women to circle the other. Mia and Carla grapple, with Mia getting the upper hand, applying a wristlock to Carla. Carla counters by dropping to the floor, taking Mia with her, and attempting a chinlock. Mia, however, gets to her feet, and quickly elbows Carla off her. Carla takes advantage of the momentum, and bounces off the ropes, running at Mia to try a clothesline. However, Mia catches Carla by the head, and throws her over the top rope. Carla manages to grab the top rope, however, and skins the cat, getting into the ring. However, when she turns to face Mia, Mia hits a dropkick to Carla, sending her over the top for real this time. Carla manages to land on her feet, and she stumbles around. Mia observes Carla, wandering about, and then leaps out of the ring in a plancha!
Carla catches Mia, and attempts a fallaway slam, but Mia lands on her feet behind Carla. Mia grabs Carla, and turns her toward her front. Mia then rakes the eyes of Carla, and grabs her wrist, applying an armlock. Mia then moves Carla toward the crowd barrier, and she hops up onto it, shades of Elix Skipper, before leaping off and hitting Carla with a tornado DDT.
Crowd: HOLY ****! HOLY ****!
Carla is down, and so is Mia, but Mia shakes off her dazed state, getting to her feet, and picking up Carla by the hair. Mia rolls Carla into the ring, and gets to the apron. Mia climbs the turnbuckle and taunts before jumping off with a leg drop. Carla, rolls out of the way, though, and Mia lands onto nothing!! Mia, too shocked to be pissed, doesn't notce Carla get to her feet, hitting a sitting Mia with a dropkick to the face! Both women are down! Carla crawls over to Mia, and attempts a pin.
1, 2...
MIA GETS THE SHOULDER UP! Carla, puts her head in her hands, before crawling to the ropes, lifting herself up. Mia does the same thing at an alternate corner to Carla, and the two women stare each other down from there. Carla eventually approaches Mia, and extends her hand. Mia stares at Carla, demanding to know "what this is" before slapping away Carla's hand. Carla looks as if she's taking it in her stride before running at Mia with a clothesline. Mia, however, counters with an oover-the-shoulder body drop that would have sent Carla to the outside if Carla hadn't grabbed the ropes and landed on the apron. Carla grabs Mia by the hair, prompting her to turn to face Carla, and both women exchange right hands to one another. It goes back and forth before Mia gets the upper hand. Carla is now hanging onto the ropes with one hand, dangling precariously. Mia smirks, and tries one last right. Suddenly, Carla ducks the blow, and hits Mia in the gut with a shoulder. Mia is bent over forwards, prompting Carla to flip over the top rope in a sunset flip!
1, 2...
Mia counters by rolling out, and quickly leaping over Carla for a bridge!
1, 2...
Carla kicks out, and both women get to their feet. Mia tries a clothesline to the recovering Carla, but Carla hits a Northern Lights suplex, hooking the leg!
1, 2...
Mia quickly kicks out, and hooks her leg around Carla's, sending her in for a small package.
1, 2...
Carla kicks out. Both women get up, and raise fists at each other before stopping literally inches away. The crowd cheers for this incredible display. Carla and Mia break away from one another, and step back, observing the other's movement. Eventually, Mia runs at Carla, who hits a back body drop. Mia lands on her feet, her momentum not stopped for a moment, before bouncing off the ropes and hitting Carla with a bulldog! Mia then jumps to her feet, and jumps off the ropes, hitting a slingshot legdrop onto Carla! Mia flips Carla over, and looks like she's about to go for a pin, but Carla counters by getting her legs up to hit a head scissors on Mia! With Mia stunned, Carla gets up, and waits for Mia to face her. Mia eventually turns, and Carla sets her up for an STO! However, Mia hits an elbow to the side of the head, and lifts up Carla for the Widow's Peak!! Carla hits Mia with kicks to the back, prompting Mia to drop Carla. Carla then bounces off the ropes, running back at Mia. Mia quickly turns to try a clothesline, but Carla ducks this, and as Mia spins around, Carla hits and STO OUT OF NOWHERE!
Carla then drags Mia's prone body to the nearest turnbuckle, and calls for the Eye Candy! However, in this moment, ROSA HITS THE RING! Carla, confused by the crowd's resonse, looks behind her, and she is hit with a DDT from Rosa! Rosa begins stomping away on Carla as Mia gets to her feet, confused by this. Mia eventually confronts Rosa, royally pissed.
Mia: WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING??
Rosa: I'M TRYING TO WIN YOU THE MATCH!! YOU'RE WELCOME(!)
Mia: YOU THINK I NEED YOUR HELP?? YOU THINK I NEED YOUR HELP YOU EGOTISTICAL B****?
*Mia slaps Rosa to an "oooh!" by the crowd. Rosa and Mia get in each other's faces, when....
OCEANIC IS HERE!! Oceanic comes in from the crowd, quickly climbing the turnbuckle, and hits a crossbody on both women!! Oceanic goes straight for Mia, hammering away with furious rights. Meanwhile, Carla gets to her feet, and sees to a Rosa, who is getting to her feet, looking around for a place to hide. However, Carla is interrupted by....CHRYSTA!!! Chrysta and Ms White hit the ring, and Chrysta hits a dropkick on Oceanic before seeing to Carla. Carla, aware of the new person in the ring, charges at Chrysta, but Chrysta hits a hurricanrana on Carla, sending her flying. Chrysta declares herself the supreme woman in the ring, and Ms White hypes this up. However, they are both interrupted when DIVA DORF hits the ring!! Chrysta coldly stares down Diva Dorf, and Diva Dorf looks as if she's about to do something. Ms White tries to push Diva Dorf out of the way, but Diva Dorf hits the FINGER POKE OF GLOBAL DESTRUCTION onto Ms White (Holy crap! Is that back?), sending her flying! However, all is interrupted when HOLLY VAUGHN climbs the turnbuckle behind Diva Dorf, and hits a missile dropkick onto Diva Dorf! Chrysta is about to comment, but OCEANIC hits her with a bulldog!! Oceanic then notices Mia getting up, and Mia and Oceanic both charge at each other, hitting a double clothesline and knocking each competitor out of it! Holly Vaughn shrugs at this, notices Diva-Dorf's downed body, and drags it to the turnbuckle. Vaughn climbs the turnbuckle when CARLA DROPSAULTS HOLLY VAUGHN, SENDING HER CRASHING THROUGH THE POLISH ANNOUNCERS TABLE!!!
Carla, breathless, turns to be hit by a chair by ROSA!! Carla remains on her feet, and staggers a bit whilst Rosa hits her again! Carla, now struggling to stay concious, still remains on her feet, and so Rosa tries again, but Carla counters with a drop toe hold, knocking out Rosa, and sending Carla out of it!!!
The ring is now a mess of downed GND candidates. Suddenly, "Going Under" hits, and Linda Ragnal walks out. She gets into the ring, observes the carnage, and grabs the mike.
Linda: Wow. All of you are fighting over little ol' me? (feign giggle) I'm honoured, I really am. But we can't have this, can we? If you want to feel like you truly earn this belt, by all means, say so, and I'll listen. But please...don't kill yourselves over it! NO-ONE wants that.
*Linda Ragnal laughs heartily, as she throws down the stick and leaves. The GND league get to their feet, and each one struggles to get to the back.*
THE MATCH IS RULED A NO CONTEST
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Curly Long
AC Slater
Midget Wrestling Master
Posts: 234
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Post by Curly Long on Oct 14, 2005 6:42:17 GMT -5
*Curly Long is backstage in his office, he is on the phone, Diesel is sitting in a chair clutching his leg, he seems to be in a lot of pain
CURLY: Yeah . . . sure . . . .your having time off with your Tri-State Title . . . thats no problem . . . . well Carlito said it wasn't cool but hey he can stick that apple where the sun don't shine . . . . ok Merc enjoy the beach . . . yep . . . . they certainly do . . . . no he hasn't got any . . . . u-huh . . . yeah . . . he's still obsessed with water . . .ok . . gotta go . . .
*Curly puts the phone down, he takes a file named Merc and places it on a tray marked Vacation, next to it is a pic of Mr. Big and Curly beating up Chris Jericho, at that Todd Grisham walks in holding the bodyguard sheet*
TODD: Sir, would you like the next candidate?
CURLY: yeah . . . oh and get me some medical people . . Diesel here was my top candidate but he injured himself walking in . . . I told those janitors to get me a wet floor sign . . ok send them in . .
*First through the door is Virgil, he clenches his fists together, as Curly looks up from his desk, he pulls out a folder and has a quick read*
CURLY: ah Virgil . . former Bodyguard to Ted Dibiase and the NWO . . . what makes you think you can be my main man?
*Virgil strokes his chin, he is about to answer when*
MAELSTROM (shouting): CURLY!
*Maelstrom barges into the office knocking Virgil to the floor in the process, Curly crosses out Virgil's name and looks up at Maelstrom*
CURLY: . .er . . problem?
MAELSTROM: Where is Merc!! . . . I want to restore some pride to the Tri-State Title, even Billy agrees with me!! . . .where is that scooter riding piece of crap?
CURLY: He's on Holiday . . look I'm busy at the moment so go and have your match with Abyss. I even gave you your favorite type of match . . . and calm down . .
MAELSTROM (shouting): I AM CALM!
*Maelstrom walks out still furious, Virgil remains knocked out next to the wall*
CURLY: Next!
*In through the door walks Giant Gonzales, he raises his hands and looks menacing
CURLY: Hmmm . . . well your certainly a big guy . . but do you have any bodyguard experience . . . Mr. Gonzales?
*Giant Gonzales looks at Curly blankly, being from Argentina his knowledge of the english word is limited. Curly getting annoyed points at the contract, but still fails to communicate. Just then Micheal Cole walks into ask about the matches tonight, unfortunately he steps on Giant Gonzales foot. This sends the big man into a rage as he chokes, slaps, and throws Micheal Cole out of the office. Curly smiles*
CURLY: Your hired! . . . sign here . . .
*Curly grabs a pen and motions to Gonzales to sign, he does so with a big cross. Curly looks at the signature and shrugs his shoulders
CURLY: It'll do . . .
*Curly points to the side of the desk and Gonzales finally decides to walk there, meanwhile some EMT's attend to Diesel and stretcher him out*
(Cut to commercial)
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DQorDie
Bubba Ho-Tep
Believe in yourself & ROCK N ROLL!!!
Posts: 635
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Post by DQorDie on Oct 14, 2005 11:25:32 GMT -5
The camera is now on Gorilla Monsoon & Jesse "The Body" Ventura at the broadcast booth
Gorilla Monsoon: Welcome back folks & the action does not stop here. We have plenty of more EWT Craption coming up including the EWT being defended for the first time, by the brand NEW champion, Dorf!
Jesse "The Body" Ventura: You know that's all fine & dandy, Monsoon, but what about Flex Magnificent?
GM: It has been days since the Toomitron has been utterly destroyed by Flex Magnificent! Not only that but he has taken his level of destruction to a whole new level. MAE YOUNG IS DEAD BECAUSE OF HIM!!! May she rest in peace! What will this monster come up with next?!
JV: Well let me tell you, Monsoon!....I thought Mae Young was already dead & Mark Henry was pulling a "Weekend at Bernie's", but this weekend there will be a very special one-on-one interview with Flex Magnificent & Tooth Floss!!! And I am sure TF will get down to business & find out what is going through the head of Flex Magnificent!
GM: Flex Magnificent & who!?
JV: Tooth Floss.
GM: Who the hell is Tooth Floss?
JV: Monsoon, suckaz gots to know, but not until this weekend! But for right now we have a match to commentate!
GM: Wow you heard it here, folks! One-on-one interview with Flex Magnificent &.....Tooth.....Floss? Maybe we'll find out why he's been so quiet over these past several days especially after that massacre of a match he had this past week. But for now let's get to ringside!
End Segment
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random poster
Mephisto
..................... brrrraaaaaaaiiiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnssssss .....................
Posts: 666
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Post by random poster on Oct 14, 2005 14:27:25 GMT -5
blurred version is shown backstage still looking for toomibischoffs office, opening a closet door having a mop fall on him "bugger off im not $lim." pushing the mop back and walking off trying to find tooms office, spotting the now disgruntled line of wannabe bodyguards slowly dispersing "that must be the place. how the hell i ever found this place when i was drunk i'll never know, been wandering around here for what seems like hours now."
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Post by scbg on Oct 14, 2005 16:58:55 GMT -5
"Hair of the Dog" blasts over the PA system as Raskall and Trunk appear for their match.
Howard Finkel: The following is a 2-on-3 HANDICAP MATCH scheduled for ONE fall! The rules are as follows: Only one man from either team can be in the ring at one time, and any illegal man who stays in for more than ten seconds shall be disqualified! Approaching the ring, at a combined weight of 515 pounds, Raskall and Trunk!!
Vince McMahon: Well, here they are Jesse. Raskall and Trunk!
Jesse Ventura: I tell ya, McMahon, I've already seen several of their matches, and they are going to be the hottest team in EWT, I can guarantee you that!
Vince: If you'll recall, Raskall and Trunk, with the help of several other men, captured Curly Long's bodyguard, Mr. Big, and currently have him locked away in an undisclosed location. We have no idea where this undisclosed location is, but we will keep you posted.
Jesse: Of course we don't know where the undisclosed location is, McMahon! That's what makes it undisclosed! Besides, it was a great tactic! Curly obviously doesn't like these guys, and what better way to turn the tables than to get rid of his bodyguard?
Vince: Well, it looks like Rick Raskall's got a microphone. Let's hear what he has to say.
Raskall: Hey! Midget boy! I already know that you know how it feels to be half a man, but how does it feel to be half a team? All of a sudden, it ain't so cozy in that office anymore, is it? You got NO idea where your buddy is! And I don't care WHO you throw at us; we'll still have the upper hand. Now, I understand we've got a match tonight against three jabronis, but before we get to that, I'd like to make a little introduction. I'd like to introduce someone who is very near and dear to my heart. Someone who was instrumental in our little "heist" last week. May I introduce the glitz, the glamour, the girl who's I'm proud to call my sweet little piece of ass, Miss Kristina Harvey!
A very attractive girl emerges from backstage. She is actually the same girl who caught Curly's attention while Mr. Big was abducted.
Vince: Look at that, Jesse! That's the same girl! She was leading Curly on while Mr. Big was attacked!
Jesse: And I don't mind saying so, McMahon, but I don't blame Curly!
Kristina has entered the ring. Raskall puts an arm around her.
Raskall: Hello baby. You look sexy.
Kristina: And back at ya.
Raskall: Why thank you. Give us a kiss.
Kristina: Yes, sir!
Raskall: Hey Trunk, do us a favor and cover up that camera. These folks at home don't deserve to see two beautiful people all at once.
Trunk covers up the camera. Raskall grabs Kristina, and they kiss, rather dramatically and showy.
Vince: Whoa there!
Jesse: Stop looking, McMahon! You don't deserve to see that!
Raskall: Thanks baby. I needed that. Trunk, show Miss Harvey to the Raskall and Trunk corner, please.
Trunk holds the ropes open so Kristina can exit the ring. She stands next to the ring apron.
Raskall: Now that I've gotten that out of the way, there's the matter of this match we have tonight. See, me and Trunk, we don't bother looking at the match board. We're always ready for a rumble. So bring on the three jabronis, and let's get this over...
A very familiar theme interrupts Raskall's speech.
HERE COMES THE AX HERE COMES THE SMASHER THEY'RE DEMOLITION WALKING DISASTERS...
Ax, Smash, and Crush of Demolition emerge from the curtain. Raskall suddenly seems a little worried.
Howard Finkel: And at a combined weight of 898 pounds, DEMOLITION!!
Vince: Whoa, not what Raskall and Trunk expected, Jesse! Demolition is here!
Jesse: You've got a point there, McMahon! You might say you're always ready for a rumble, but nobody's ever quite ready for a showdown with Demolition!
Demolition enters the ring and the bell rings.
Vince: Well, here we go! This is a 2-on-3 handicap match, and it looks like Rick Raskall and Smash will start things out.
Jesse: I don't know if that's a good strategy there, McMahon. I'd get the big guy Trunk in there first. He could wear them down so Raskall can have an easier time.
Vince: Well, remember Jesse, Rick Raskall isn't exactly a humble Superstar. The man certainly is full of himself.
Smash goes for a clothesline, but Raskall ducks and goes off the ropes. He tries taking down Smash with a chop block, but Smash barely moves. He goes of the ropes again, but Smash meets him with a shoulderblock. He drops an elbow on Raskall and stomps him. Raskall rolls out of the ring and takes a breather.
Vince: Maybe a little too cocky, eh Jess?
Jesse: It's strategy, McMahon. He's taking a break.
Raskall tries to get back in the ring, but Smash grabs him by the hair. Raskall grabs the ropes and "skins the cat", planting both feet into Smash's face.
Vince: Whoa, a clever move by Rick Raskall!
Jesse: Certainly knew what he was doing there!
Raskall rolls back in the ring as Smash is still stumbling around from the kick. Raskall dropkicks Smash in the back. Smash tumbles forward and is hung up on the middle rope. Raskall runs to one rope, then leaps over Smash, flips over the top rope and drops his leg across the back of Smash's neck.
Vince: And another innovative maneuver by Rick Raskall!
Smash is spinning around, dizzy from the move. Raskall stands on the apron, presumably preparing for a springboard move. But Crush runs over and clotheslines him off.
Vince: Ohhh, and Crush stops Raskall from doing more damage!
The distraction allows Smash to tag in Ax. Ax goes to the outside and rolls Raskall back into the ring. He whips Raskall hard into the turnbuckle. He charges Raskall with his shoulder, but Raskall rolls out of the way, sending Ax into the post. While Ax is down, Raskall gets to his corner and tags in Trunk.
Vince: And here comes Marcus Trunk! Let's see how he handles Demolition!
Trunk runs into the corner and delivers a hard knee to the chest of Ax. He follows up with kicks to the sternum.
Vince: And Marcus Trunk really giving it to Ax! I can't imagine what that feels like!
Trunk pulls Ax out of the corner. He hooks Ax's arm and gets him up in a vertical suplex. He holds it for quite a long time.
Vince: Look at this, Jesse! What a feat of strength by Marcus Trunk!
Jesse: That's a great feat of strength to lift a guy as big as Ax, and hold him up for that long!
After about ten seconds, Trunk finally drops Ax. He picks Ax up and whips him into the rope. Ax comes back and receives a stiff kick across the chest. Trunk goes off the opposite rope and nails Ax with a clothesline. He goes for a pin.
Vince: And look at this, Jesse! Maybe a pinfall! 1...2...no.
Trunk picks up Ax again and whips him to the rope, Ax comes back with a shoulderblock, dropping Trunk. Trunk gets back up and eats another shoulderblock. Ax is waving his arms for Trunk to get up, and delivers another shoulderblock. He goes off the rope and clotheslines Trunk, and again. Trunk gets back up, and Ax runs at him again. Trunk catches him and nails a huge powerslam.
Vince: Looks like Ax went to the well one too many times, Jesse!
Jesse: But it took a lot out of Trunk, too! Both men are down!
Both men are slowly crawlng to their corners. Trunk reaches Raskall first, but Ax reaches his corner and tags Crush. Raskall suddenly backs up and puts up his hands.
Vince: And here comes the fresh man in this match! Crush is dying to get his hands on Rick Raskall!
Crush unleashes several punches to the head of Raskall, then sends him to the rope and drops him with a back elbow. Crush is getting pumped up!
Vince: Crush is feeding off this crowd, Jesse!
Jesse: He'd better concentrate on the match, McMahon! These fans aren't in the ring with him, you know!
As Raskall gets up, Crush goes off the rope, but Raskall ducks a clothesline. As Crush comes back, Raskall catches him and nails a DDT.
Vince: Whoa! Big turning point there, Jesse!
Raskall gets to his feet and makes his way towards the turnbuckle.
Vince: What's he got in mind here, Jesse?
Jesse: Looks like Raskall's gonna do some high flying, McMahon!
Raskall grabs the top rope, and leaps up into a springboard moonsault, but Crush rolls out of the way. However, Raskall lands on his feet, and nails Crush with a Superkick!
Vince: Wow, superkick to Crush! That took a little out of Raskall too! They're both down!
Both men are trying to make it to their corners. While Crush is trying to make it to his corner for a tag, Smash sneaks behind the referee's back and drags Raskall away from his corner. Crush makes the tag to Ax.
Jesse: Referee, pay attention! Smash just stole the match right from behind your back!
Smash makes it back to his corner before the referee notices. Ax starts punching away at Raskall, then sends him off the ropes and hits him with a clothesline, Then he points toward the top rope!
Vince: Uh oh, Jesse! If this means what I think it does, it's Decapitation time!
Ax tags in Smash. Smash lays Raskall across his knee as Ax climbs to the top rope. But before he can hit the elbow drop, Trunk runs across the ring, grabs Smash around the waist, and hits him with a German suplex. Smash releases Raskall and Ax comes off the top rope.
Vince: OH, so very close to the end!
Trunk returns to his corner. Raskall sees Smash on the mat and slowly climbs to the top rope.
Vince: And Raskall is trying the top rope again! What's he got in mind here?
Jesse: Looks like the Raskall House Special, McMahon!
Raskall leaps off the turnbuckle with the Raskall House Special, but Smash rolls out of the way, sending Raskall crashing to the mat. Smash crawls over to Raskall and goes for the cover.
Vince: Here we go! It could be all over here! 1...2...NO! He kicked out!
Smash crawls over to his corner and tags in Crush. Crush picks up Raskall and sends him into the rope. Raskall ducks a clothesline. Crush goes off the rope, but Kristina grabs Crush's leg, holding him long enough for Raskall to make the tag to Trunk. Crush turns around and goes for a clothesline on Trunk, who ducks. He goes off the rope, but Trunk catches him with the Trunk Buster!
Vince: There it is, the Trunk Buster! This one could be over now!
Kristina runs to the other side of the ring and grabs Ax's leg, preventing him from entering the ring. Raskall enters the ring and clotheslines Smash. The count is made.
1...2...3!!
Vince: And it's all over! Raskall and Trunk overcome the odds and win the 2-on-3 handicap match!
Jesse: Maybe next time Curly Long will know better than to underestimate what I believe is the best tag team in the EWT!
Finkel: Here are your winners, Raskall and Trunk!
Raskall, Trunk, and Kristina are all in the ring celebrating. Kristina has her arms around Raskall. Raskall gives Trunk a three-step handshake, and the three of them exit the ring.
Commercial break
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Post by pta on Oct 14, 2005 17:29:54 GMT -5
Chance Confidence, Principal Pain, and Canceler are standing by backstage, with Sum Guy.
Sum Guy: Hello everyone. I'm Sum Guy and my favorite letter of the alphabet is X. I'm here with The P.T.A. Earleir on, we saw Chance Confidence, make a very impressive debut. I mean... i saw moves from that guy that I don't think even A.J. Styles could pull off.
Chance looks at Sum and nods.
Confidence: Well Sum... what kind of name is that anyway?
Sum: It's Chinese... but I'm American. My mom named me when she was drunk I think...
Confidence: You sad sad man. Now... where were we? Ah yes, the interviewing. You see... I am perfection itself, splendor, a rare diamond among all the other Zircons. A Lion... in the midst of kittens. A king... among peasants...
Sum: Ummm... I think I get the...
Chance looks at him angrily.
Chance: Don't interrupt me Sum... or I'll do to you what I did to Eugene and that nameless announcer.
Sum wets himself... shaking and nods.
Sum: I'm... I'm sorry... please continue Mr. Confidence.
Chance smiles and pats Sum on the head.
Chance: Much better. As I was saying... I am a god among mortals... a building of steel... compared to those made of cheap plywood. You see Sum, what you witnessed this week... is only the beginning of what you will soon see from Chance... Confidence.
Sum: I see... Principal Pain, do you have any thoughts?
Pain: Hmmm... well I chose Chance because he is a fertile young mind... ready to be taught and molded into a perfect wrestler. One that surpasses any of those so called... EWT Legends. In his debut match, Chance didn't even suffer a scratch... didn't even break a sweat... and that is why I chose Chance here.
Sum: Ah I see... and what about your match this week Mr. Pain.
Pain: Hmmm... it seems that this week, we will be facing two brainless oafs... they shouldn't be too much of a problem to dispatch. While it seems our friends... the Nyrds, will be facing two wannabe rappers.
Sum: Speaking of the Nyrds... do you have a response to what they said to you?
Pain looks back at Sum...
Pain: Hmmm of course. Canceler!!!
The huge man standing behind turns towards a wall behind them and punches a HUGE gapping hole in it. Sum Guy falls over from surprise.
Sum: Ack!!! Ummm... don't you think Curly Long will make you pay for that?
Pain looks down at Sum and smirks.
Pain: That's not of importance. However, that's exactly how easily we will crush those Nyrds.
Sum: Ahhh... and what about you Mr... Chance? Do you have any challenges for any EWT superstars?
Chance looks at him and nods.
Chance: As a matter of fact... I do. I'm issuing an open challenge to any EWT Superstar... whther they be... the former champ DSR, the UNOFFICIAL Toolshed Champion Paul... Whatisname... the Peacekeeper Carl Guerrero, or even... that David Davies fellow... whatever his gimmick of the month may be. Because it will not make a difference. I will crush any one of them... and if any of you don't think so... well... you're just JEALOUS!!!
Confidence turns around and gives Sum Guy another Low Blow kick, then nails him with a Confidence Breaker... then popping back up off the floor and looking down, before he and the P.T.A. leave the scene.
Sum Guy: * Weakly * Well... I'm Sum Guy... and I think something may be broken...
Fade to commercial
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Post by DSR on Oct 14, 2005 19:18:56 GMT -5
Finkel: The following contest is scheduled for one fall, and is a SUBMISSION MATCH! Introducing first, from Pittsburgh, PA…KURT! ANGLE!
*Kurt Angle’s music begins to play. The Olympic hero comes out, and the crowd chants “You suck” to his music, as usual. Angle gets into the ring and stands on the turnbuckles, as the crowd snaps photos of him.
Finkel: His opponent hails from Bayside, CA. He has held every title in the EWT other than the Girl Next Door Title, and is an EIGHT TIME Scammy Award Winner…D! S! R!
*“Aboard the Leper Colony” begins to play, but DSR doesn’t come out. The music stops. Suddenly, “A Torrid Love Affair” by Boys Night Out plays, and DSR comes charging out to a huge ovation. DSR’s shoulder and midsection are bandaged up, but he seems ready to go. DSR rolls into the ring and grabs a microphone.
DSR: Kurt, I know full well I’ve got my work cut out for me with you tonight, and don’t think I’m lookin’ past ya, but I got somethin’ ta say! D-Boy, you sick sonofabitch! I told you to prove to me that you deserved to be in the EWT Hall of Fame. And what do you do? You cheapshot me after I’ve already had TWO grueling matches and you attack me with a f***ing light tube. As far as I’m concerned, all you’ve proven to me is that I’ve been one hundred percent RIGHT about you, you’re a f***ing yard tard POSING as a wrestler, and your induction in the Hall of Fame is nothing more than a g***amn joke!
*DSR hands off the mic, the bell rings, and the match is underway. Angle sneak attacks DSR from behind, attempting an Angle Slam. DSR lands on his feet behind Angle and locks his arms around the Gold Medalist. DSR throws Angle over with a Release German Suplex! DSR grabs Angle’s legs to give him a Sharpshooter, but while DSR is bent over, Angle grabs DSR’s hair. The ref yells at Angle to let go, so Angle squirms his way to the ropes, causing DSR to have to let go. DSR gives the clean break. Angle gets to his feet and locks up with DSR. The two struggle a bit before DSR hits an armdrag. Angle charges DSR, and DSR hits a Japanese armdrag. Angle charges DSR again, this time DSR hits a drop toe hold, and locks on an Ankle Lock on Kurt! Kurt rolls through the pressure, and DSR breaks the hold. Angle gets to his feet, and he and DSR circle one another for a few seconds. The two men lock up again, with Kurt twisting on DSR’s arm, then proceeding to pound DSR’s shoulder a few times. DSR looks off into the crowd.
DSR: Oh my gawd, Kurt, look! A UNICORN!
Kurt: *looks* Where?!
*DSR does a one armed cartwheel into an armdrag to break the hold. Angle realizes DSR’s ruse and charges with a clothesline. DSR ducks and grabs Kurt all at once, and delivers the EXPLODER SUPLEX! DSR and Kurt both get up and proceed to trade punches. DSR gets the advantage and whips Kurt into the corner. Kurt’s chest hits the top turnbuckle, and he stumbles out of the corner. DSR gets an idea and spears Kurt from behind! Kurt arches up on his way down to the mat. DSR then grabs Kurt’s legs and locks on a Sharpshooter! DSR really stretches Kurt, and combined with the injury of the spear to the back, Angle’s in a lot of pain! Angle inches his way to the ropes, before finally grabbing the bottom rope, causing the break of the hold. DSR breaks the hold, but then delivers a series of elbow drops to Kurt’s back. Kurt rolls to the outside to catch a breather. The crowd rallies behind DSR, who runs the ropes. He charges and nails Angle on the outside with a TOPAY!!!! DSR lands on his feet and does some jaw jacking with a few fans.
The Crowd: DSR! DSR! DSR! DSR!
*DSR grabs Angle and attempts to whip him into the barricade, but Angle counters, and DSR hits the barricade with a loud thud! Kurt grabs DSR like he’s going to hit a German Suplex on the outside. DSR hits a few back elbows before pointing out into the crowd.
DSR: Kurt, look! A woman that wants to have bestiality sex with you!
Kurt: *looks* Huh?
*DSR breaks Kurt’s grip and shoulder tackles Kurt into the barricade. DSR then charges Kurt into the ring apron. Angle clutches his lower back, as DSR grabs him and rolls him into the ring. DSR drags Kurt toward the corner. DSR then climbs the turnbuckles, getting ready to nail the DSR Escape Plan. Kurt rolls out of the way, however, causing DSR to land on his knees. DSR holds his knees as Kurt gets to his feet. Kurt locks DSR in a leg grapevine, but DSR is too close to the ropes. He easily grabs the ropes. Kurt pulls DSR toward the middle of the ring and locks on a Crippler Crossface! DSR struggles for a few minutes, inching toward the ropes. DSR grabs the ropes again. Angle breaks the hold. Once DSR gets to his feet, Angle grabs him for an abdominal stretch, applying pressure to the bandaged midsection, but DSR refuses to give up. Angle grabs DSR around the midsection and delivers a German Suplex! Angle keeps his hands locked and hits a second German! Angle gets DSR up for the hat trick, but DSR lands on his feet behind Kurt. DSR grabs Kurt and delivers an Angle Slam of his own! Both men are laid out.
The Crowd: DSR! DSR! DSR!
*DSR and Angle both slowly get to their feet. Angle punches DSR in the face. DSR chops Angle’s chest. The two trade shots back and forth. DSR blocks a punch and grabs Angle, delivering a second Exploder Suplex! DSR grabs Angle’s legs and locks on the Sharpshooter! Angle pulls himself slowly towards the ropes. Angle is just inches away from the bottom rope. DSR pulls Angle back towards the middle of the ring. Angle struggles for 30 seconds, desperately trying to get to the ropes. Finally, he can’t take anymore, and taps!
Finkel: The winner of the match, D! S! R!
*DSR breaks the hold, falling to the mat in a heap. The ref raises DSR’s arm. DSR eventually rolls out of the ring, and walks around slapping hands with fans. DSR stumbles up the entrance ramp. He raises his arms in celebration one last time before mouthing the name “D-Boy” and walking backstage. End scene.
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Post by curtrok on Oct 14, 2005 19:24:12 GMT -5
We join Jim Ross who is conducting an interview with new EWT supertar Penultimate Warrior.
PW: Jim Ross, for many months I have watched form up above while those down below have made a mockery of what I hold sacred. The current Champions here in the EWT do not have the phyiscal skills or the intensity needed to take the EWT to the next level.
There must be a change if there is going to be progress. And for change I look above to a rocket ship. Jet fueled by the power of English Teachers and oil from Arab Nations and I say to you Jim Ross and to you EWT that I will taste gold here in the EWT, it has been faaar to long. I watched as those I trained with, Curtrok, Botchberg and so on lost their intensity, were tempted by money and women but those things matter not.
What matters most is the EWT title, I don't care what I must do but it must be done. When it is done there will be a great travisty of the sky. Blood red will be the mats of the EWT, bones will be shattered, corn torn from the husk but when all is said and done. When all the dust settles, when the no somoking signs are put up there will be one man left standing. ONE MAN WITH THE POWER. That man is the.
PENULTIMATE WARRIOR.
JR: What in the hell are you talking about, corn husks?
PW: JR Do you want me to show you the power of the warrior?
JR: I've been around the block too many times to fall for that trick let me get out of the ring now while health is still in tact bah gawd.
PW: That was a wise decision becuase as you well know those who stand in the path of the Warrior face destrucity!
Break.
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Post by craigkendo on Oct 15, 2005 11:27:30 GMT -5
*WARNING, VIEWER DISCRETION IS ADVISED. DON'T SAY I DIDN'T WARN YOU.*
*The Blue World Order come out to a HUGE pop, accompanied by Chastity. The bWo do their thing, and Chastity taunts. Chastity then pauses, and asks Stevie a question.*
Chastity: So...who exactly am I facing?
Stevie: Uh...Uh oh. Holly Vaughn.
*The Blue World Order look stunned at this.*
Chastity: Who's that?
Nova: Are you out of your mind?? She's the one that broke Joey Mercury's leg in half!! ON A WHIM!!
Chastity: WHAT? And you think I can BEAT HER?
Meanie: Uh...if you'll remember, we never actually said that.
*The Blue World Order leg it out of the ring. Chastity yells at them to come back, when the lights dim. "Ich Will" hits, and Holly Vaughn, accompanied by Tony Chang, makes her way slowly to the ring. She very slowly gets into the ring, and both Chang and Vaughn hold out their arms in prayer.
The bell rings, and the match is underway. Chastity runs at Holly, and tackles her, thumping her head against the mat in a rage. Holly counters by kicking Chastity off, and immediately getting to her feet to hit a dropkick. Chastity gets up as Holly patiently waits. As soon as Chastity is on her feet, Holly hits another dropkick. Chastity is down again. Holly calmly makes her way to the nearest turnbuckle, and climbs it, patiently waiting for Chastity to get up. Chastity gets to her feet, and runs at the turnbuckle, trying to shover Holly off. However, Holly nonchalantly pushes Chastity away with a foot to the face. Chastity stumbles back as Holly leaps off the turnbuckle, hitting a hurricanrana onto Chastity!
Holly approaches Chastity, and observes her. She then drags Chastity's body over to the ropes, and traps both feet into the ropes as Tony Chang looks on with glee. The ref tries to interfere with this, but Chang threatens him until he backs away from the ropes. Holly obvserves Chastity's thrashing movements to try and free herself with an emotionless gaze, and she then motions to Chang. Chang reaches into his pocket to fetch out some handcuffs, and he throws them to Holly. Holly uses the handcuffs to tie Chastity's left arm back, chaining it to on of the ropes. Holly then lifts up the fingers of Chastity's right hand...and she places her foot on top of Chastity's first finger. Holly looks nonchalantly at Chastity, who is pleading Holly not to hurt her. The ref, panicked by this, pleads at Holly; "Enough is enough!" Holly looks to be taking this all in...and she steps down on Chastity's finger, BREAKING IT BACK!!!!
Chastity writhes about in pain as Holly looks on in curiousity. Tony Chang laughs in a sick manner, enjoying the whole experience. Holly then takes a key from her pocket, and releases the handcuffs on Chastity. Chastity uses her free hand to hold her broken finger in agony. Holly then calmly releases Chastity's feet from the ropes. Chastity gets to her feet, and tries to leave the ring, but Holly grabs her by the hair, and pulls her in for a snap suplex. Holly then calmly climbs the turnbuckle, and as Chastity gets to her feet, Holly leaps off in a moonsault, coming down and hitting a DDT onto Chastity. Holly then goes for the pin, the referee counting quickly just to get Chastity out of the match.
1,2,3!
Winner: Holly Vaughn.
*Post-Match, EMTs rush to the ring to see to Chastity as Holly walks calmly to the back, accompanied by Tony Chang, laughing away.*
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Post by Chrysta on Oct 15, 2005 12:53:00 GMT -5
Chimel: Ladies and gentlemen, the following contest is scheduled for one fall. Making her way to the ring first...
*Senzafine plays as Chrysta slowly makes her way to the ring, with Ms White following behind her.*
Chimel: From Juno, Alaska, being accompanied by Ms. White...Chrysta, the Ice Queen!
*As Chrysta gets into the ring, Ms. White stands by the corner, and Ice Cold comes down to the ring. Before Chimel can talk into the mic to announce her, Chrysta takes it from him.*
Chrysta: So...your name is Ice Cold?
*IC gets into the ring.*
Chrysta: If I were to guess right, I'd say you were copying my persona.
*IC take the mic from Chrysta.*
IC: That's what you think, Ice Queen. I'll have you know that I am here to shatter your dreams like an icicle faling from the rooftops! I will blow you away, just as the wind blows the snow around during a snow storm. I will-
*Chrysta punches IC in the face and knocks her to the ground.*
Chrysta: I've had enough of your idioms! THis match starts and ends now!
*Chrysta walks to Ice Cold and stomps at her legs. She grabs IC by the throat and chokes her until the ref counts to 4, then tosses her out of the chokehold. Chrysta lands a legdrop on IC's chest, and IC writhes in pain. Chrysta picks her up again and darts her on top of a turnbuckle that was untied byt Ms. White while the ref wasn't looking. IC's face is now dripping with blood. Chrysta wipes a bit off with two fingers, and tastes it. The crowd looks in disgust and boos Chrysta,as she goes to the top rope for the Falling Icicle, but IC rolls out of the way, and Chrysta lands on the canvas. IC picks Chrysta up, but Chrysta slaps IC's hands away, and twists one of IC's arms. Still holding onto it, Chrysta goes to the top rope, walks a few inches, trying to balance herself, and drops a punch onto IC's arm. Chrysta then puts IC into the Frostbite, which IC taps out to.*
Chimel: Here is your winner by submission...Chrysta!
*Chrysta rolls out of the ring as Ms. White follows her into the back area.*
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Post by paulpodanski on Oct 15, 2005 16:29:30 GMT -5
Announcer: The following contest is schdeuled for one fall and it is a Hardcore rules match. The winner of this match will become the NEW Unofficial Toolshed Champion
Suddenly, Raven starts walking down to the ring, pushing a shopping kart full of weapons.
Announcer: Introducing the challenger, now residing in Atlanta Georgia, weighing in at 244 pounds, he has held the WWE Hardcore Championship 26 Times, Raven!!!
Raven enters the ring and sits in the corner of a turnbuckle, waiting for his opponent.
Suddenly, Let the Bodies Hit the Floor starts up and Paul Podanski walks out to the stage, to a rather nice pop. He's got a few weapon's of his own, a pool cue, a bag of billiard balls, rake, and tons more goodies. He has his belt around his neck again as he runs full speed and slides into the ring before the announcer can... well, announce him, taking the pool cue and immediately walking over to a sitting Raven and starts thing off with a shot to the groin with his stick as the bell rings. Raven holds his private area in pain as he falls over. Paul immediately follows up with more swift smacks from the pool cue, to the ribs of Raven.
The crowd then watches as Paul lifts Raven up, then crouches down, aiming the pool cue at his crotch again and attempting to " rack his balls " but Raven quickly counters with a stiff kick to Paul's head. He drops the stick and looks up at Raven who starts nailing lefts and rights on him. Paul starts reeling a bit as Raven takes him down with a clothesline. He stomps at him a bit... then picks up something from Paul's weapons, the bag of billiard balls and dumps them all on top of Paul.
Paul groans as each one hits him. Raven takes the number eight ball and cracks it in half voer his head, Paul falling over as Raven goes for a pin. 1...2...
But Paul gets the shoulder up. Raven gets a bit frustraed and stomps some more at Paul, then rolls out of the ring. He comes back with a stop sign from his shopping kart and waits for Paul to rise abck up, as soon he does, he swings, but misses. Raven looks a bit shocked as Pau lruns forward and gives him a big boot... tearing through the stop sign and connecting with Raven's face. The crowd pops loudly. Paul smirks then looks through his bag of goodies and pulls out... a Stuffed Raven doll. He holds it up then tears the thing's head off and starts stuffing the plush inside Raven's mouth... causing him to choke slightly.
As Raven rolls around the ring, Paul runs over and boucnes off the ropes and attempts to hit him with a senton splash, but Raven rolls out of the way. Paul lands hard on his rear, groaning a bit as Raven unstuffs his mouth... spitting out plush. He walsk back over and lifts Paul back up, hitting a few times, then taking him down with a neckbreaker. Paul goes down as Raven goes for a quick cover. 1...2...
But again Paul get's the shoulder up. Raven gets a bit more frustrated now, getting back up and stomping at Paul some more, then leaping up for a leg drop to his throat. POaul holds his recently injured throat in pain and starts rolling around. Raven gets back to his feet, digging around in Paul's bag of goodies a bit more. He then pulls out... a brownish bag of something. Raven looks inside and gets a DISGUSTED look on his face.
Walking voer, he looks down at Paul and starts untying the sack, but suddenly, Paul gives him a swift low blow kick from the gorund, Raven bouncing around and dropping the bag. Paul rises to his feet, then dumps the bag all over Raven. He's now covered from head to toe... in crap. Shades of Paul Poo.
Paul starts laughing at the very embarrassed Raven, only to get clotheslined over the top rope and sent to the outside. Raven quickly follows, still covered in crap. Soon he and Paul start punching each other as they stagger up the ramp. The referee runs after them in an attempt to keep up with the action.
Eventually the two make their way backstage, Paul grabbing raven by the head and slamming him into the wall. Raven groans, but retaliates by grabbing Paul's own head and slamming it back into the same wall. This continues for a few more seconds. Finally Paul grabs Raven and whips him full speed, watching him collide with Sum Guy. Raven falls over as Sum Guy wets himself. Paul then runs forward and goes for another Senton Splash, connecting this time and crushing Raven and Sum Guy. He goes for a cover again. 1...2...
But Raven gets the shoulder up again. Paul groans, lifting Raven back up and punching him more, the two now making their way into someone's lockeroom.
They see Billy Ubermark whose staring at what's goign on. Paul grabs Raven and smashes him head first into Billy's mirror, the thing shattering and busting him wide open. Paul smirks and suplexs him onto the floor. He goes for another cover. 1...2..
But again, Raven somehow gets the shoulder up. Paul gets a bit more frustrated as Raven runs forward and hit him with a dropkick, sending him staggering out of Ubermark's lockeroom, just wondering what the hell's going on.
Back in the hallway, Raven and Paul continue brawling, soon reaching the soda machines.
Raven: What your favorite soda Paul?!
Paul groans as he gets whipped hard into the soda machine, causing soda's to spill all over the floor. Raven picks up a can of Grapico and pours it all over Paul's face, Paul yelping in Pain and covering his eyes. Raven smirks and then grabs another can, this time Sunkist and pours it as well... all over Paul's body. Raven next grabs a can of Coke... but Paul kicks it out of his hand. He slowly rises back up, his clothes now extremely sticky. Raven looks a bit shocked now as Paul grabs him and whips him again, this time Raven crashing right through Curly Long's office.
Curly: Eh? What the hell?!
Paul runs after Raven who's now laying on top of Curly Long's table. He quickly climbs up onto a file cabinet and then jumps off for the Appaulachian Mountain Splash!!! He crashes right through the table as Raven rolls off, Curly's table ruined now. Raven groans and puts an arm around Paul. The referee, out of rbeath, catches up and starts to count. 1...2...
But again Paul gets the shoulder up. Raven can't believe it... he lifts Paul back up and tries to nails an Evenflow DDT, but Paul counters into a back body drop to the floor somehow. He slowly kneels down, catching his breath. Soon as he does, Raven rises back up, grabbing Paul from behind and dragging him back out. The two keep fighting, as various EWT Superstars watch them. After more punching, they make their way to... the parking lot. Paul grabs Raven and whips him into a brown Honda Civic, Raven's head bouncing off the top. He groans as Paul hits him with some stiff shots to the face.
Raven just lays there, taking Paul's punishment. Soon though, Raven rolls off the car and clotheslines Paul again, sending him to the concrete. Another cover 1...2...
NO! Paul once again gets the shoulder up. Raven can't believe this. He lifts Paul back up and drags him back into the building, to the EWT Merchandise store. A bunch of fans are cheering loudly as Raven whips Paul over into the merchandise stand, Paul groaning as Raven climbs over to the other side of the stand as well. He lifts Paul up and grabs an Ultimo Chocula Sugar fix shirt.
Raven: Hey Paul! Here's a sugar fix!
He starts wrapping the shirt around Paul's neck, trying to choke him out, Paul desparately flailing about, trying to escape. Raven howver won't let him, applying more and more pressure around his neck. But Paul starts fighting back, with elbows to the back of his head. Raven soon loosen's his grip and Paul takes him to the floor. He walsk over a bunch of EWT dolls.
Paul: Oh now you're gonna pay!!!
He grabs a DSR doll and chucks it at Raven's face, watching it bounce off. Followed by a pair of Nyrds Doll, an Ultimo Chocula doll, a Dof doll, a Joe Ragnal Doll, and finally, a Mercenary Doll. By then Raven's face is covered with bruises as he stands back up and tackles Paul into the EWT doll display, punching him in the face. he grabs a commerative Toomi Bischoff cup and smashes him in the face with it. Paul slumps over, as Raven tosses him out of the Souvenier stand. Raven then drags him back out towards the ring.
Soon, you can see Paul and Raven fighting down the ramp way, the crowd cheering loudly. Raven whips paul back into the ring, then picks up a fire extinguisher from his shopping kart of goodies. He rolls into the ring and swings it at Paul's face, but misses, Paul counters by grabbing the extinguisher and spraying it at raven's face blinding him. Paul then lifts him and starts spinning 1...2...3...4...5...6...7 and slams him down with the Paulerbomb. He somehow crawls over and drapes an arm for the cover. The referee manages to make his way back out. 1....2...3!!!
Announcer: Here is your winner... and still The Unofficial EWT Toolshed Chamion, Paul Podanski!!!
Paul slowly rises up and takes some deep breathes. He watches as Raven gets back up and smirks.
Paul: Hey not bad. Let's go get drunk...
Raven: Sure...
The two leave the ring and we go to a commercial.
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Post by Gasoline: Gen. Tech Member on Oct 15, 2005 16:38:43 GMT -5
RA: The following contest is scheduled for one fall. Introducing first, being accompanied by Rosa and the Heartbreak Hitman Bret Michaels, weighing in at 323 lbs, "Big Daddy" Gasoline!
*Gasoline comes out to a mixed reaction. Then comes a wildcat growl followed by a crack of a whip*
RA: And his opponent, being accompanied by Sable, "Wildman" Marc Mero!
*Crowd pops somewhat for the Wildman*
The bell rings to start the match. Gas and Wildman lock up. Gas gets the upper hand with a knee to the mid-section. He then delivers a club to the back of the neck. He rolls him over and gives him a blatant choke. The ref initiates the 5 count. Gas lets go after 4. He picks up Wildman and body slams him. He follows that up with a leg drop and covers him.
1... 2...
Wildman kicks out. He goes to pick him up, but Wildman surprises him with a jawbreaker. He keeps the momentum going by doing a standing dropkick, dropping Gas to one knee. Then he runs to the ropes and takes Gas down with a flying clothesline. He lets out a yell and takes him to the corner, where he sets him up for the 10 punches. He lands all 10 of them, then takes him down with a drop toe hold. He covers Gas.
1... 2...
Gas kicks out. Wildman picks him up and plants him with a DDT. He signals for the Shooting Star Press. He climbs the ropes, but Gas gets up and tosses him off. Gas then whips Wildman to the ropes and lands a big boot. Next he beats his head on the turnbuckle before giving him a spinebuster. Finally, Gas gives Wildman a Jackknife Powerbomb and covers him 1, 2, 3.
RA: Here is your winner, "Big Daddy" Gasoline!
*As Gasoline celebrates with HBH and Rosa in the ring, Sable comes into the ring to check on Wildman. Suddenly Rosa throws Sable to the ground. Then she picks her up and gives her a Northern Lights Driver. The crowd boos the trio as they head up the ramp*
*Fade to commercial*
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Post by Oceanic on Oct 15, 2005 21:04:44 GMT -5
"Sexy Guy" plays over the arena and Rosa comes out from the back, Heartbreak Hitman and Gasoline on either side of her. HBH and Gas jaw jack with the fans and act arrogant as they head to the ring but Rosa is focused. All three get in the ring and pose for the crowd.
The lights go out and the green shimmering effect washes over the ramp. "Maritime" plays and the crowd pops as Oceanic comes out from the back. She walks to the ring calmly and walks up the steps but doesn't get into the ring. She gives HBH and Gas the skunk eye before finally entering the ring. The lights come back up and the referee looks to get the match underway. Rosa turns to the guys and tells them to wait outside the ring. Once they leave the bell rings.
The two women lock up and Rosa gets the upper hand with a standing wrist lock. Oceanic steps behind and sends Rosa to the mat keeping the wrist lock applied. Rosa tries to get to her feet but Oceanic won't let her, keeping the pressure applied on her wrists. Oceanic steps over and applies a reverse arm bar. Rosa tries to grab at Oceanic with her free hand and finally gets ahold of her ankle. She picks Oceanic up by the leg and she topples over onto her back breaking the wrist lock. Rosa applies a standing ankle lock. After struggling a few moments Oceanic uses her other leg to push Rosa off. Rosa flies back onto the mat but gets back up immediately. Oceanic is up just as fast and the two lock up again. Rosa backs Oceanic up to the turnbuckles and the ref calls for a break. The two let go and Rosa belts Oceanic with a fist across the eye. Rosa throws a couple more punches and sends Oceanic to the opposite turnbuckles but she reverses and Rosa hits the buckles. Rosa walks out and gets a Thai elbow across the nose sending her down to the mat. Rosa gets back up but Oceanic throws a stiff kick to her side, doubling her over. Oceanic puts Rosa in a standing suplex and follows with a jumping leg drop. Oceanic stands back up and measures Rosa. Once Rosa is up Oceanic hits her with a jumping enziguri. She goes for a pin.
1.......... 2..........
Rosa kicks out. Rosa retreats to a corner and gets advice from HBH. Once they end their discussion Rosa comes out and puts her hand up, signaling for a test of strength. Oceanic accepts and they lock hands. Rosa appears to get the upper hand (no pun intended) but Oceanic reverses and puts Rosa down on one knee. Oceanic then steps over Rosa's left arm causing her to flip onto her back. Oceanic appears to be going for an arm submission but Rosa, knowing what it might be, scrambles over to the ropes and the ref forces a break.
HBH and Gas give Rosa a few more tips and she comes back out to the center of the ring again. Rosa stomps on Oceanic's foot and puts her in a side headlock. Oceanic backs her up and sends her into the ropes. Rosa bounces off, ducks under a clothesline but catches a calf kick on the rebound. As Rosa gets up she's met with a flurry of knees and elbows from Oceanic and ends with a monster head butt. Rosa looks to be in trouble and Oceanic goes to the ropes for momentum. Oceanic appears to be going for a Lou Thesz Press but Rosa reverses and Hot Shots Oceanic's throat across the top rope. Oceanic is on her back grabbing her neck as Rosa regroups. HBH and Gas applaud wildly.
Rosa takes Oceanic by the hair and picks her up. Rosa gives her a body slam, then a knee drop, then punches Oceanic a few times in the head. Rosa picks Oceanic up again and sends her into the ropes, connecting with a back body drop. Oceanic sits up and tries to straighten her back which leaves her open for a dropkick to the shoulders from Rosa. Oceanic drops and Rosa covers.
1........ 2........
Oceanic kicks out. Rosa picks Oceanic up and hits her with a Rocker Dropper, getting a big cheer out of HBH. Rosa gives Oceanic a shoulderbreaker, then goes up to the second turnbuckle and leaps off with a senton back splash. She covers again.
1......... 2........
Oceanic gets a shoulder up. Rosa picks up Oceanic and applies an abdominal stretch. The ref is checking to see if Oceanic wants to give up but she doesn't. Rosa keeps the hold applied for a few minutes wearing Oceanic down. Suddenly it looks like Oceanic is reversing and she does, hiptossing Rosa down to the mat. Rosa gets up and Oceanic goes for a front shin kick but Rosa ducks, kicks Oceanic in the stomach, and gives her a Stunner dead center in the ring. She hooks the leg and goes for a pin.
1......... 2.........
Oceanic kicks out at 2 & a half. Rosa can't believe it as she gets in the referee's face holding up three fingers. Rosa goes back to work on Oceanic with a back breaker and an elbow drop. Rosa signals that she's ready to end it and walks over to the turnbuckles, stomping her foot on the mat, warming up the band. Oceanic staggers up as Rosa measures her. Finally Rosa lunges forward for the Sweet Chin Muzak but Oceanic catches her foot at the last moment and dragon screws her to the mat. Rosa tries to go back on the offensive but Oceanic pelts her across the forehead with a jumping knee strike. Rosa staggers up but is kicked twice in the stomach, then axe kicked across the back of the head sending her down on her stomach. Oceanic hooks her arms around Rosa's stomach and lifts her off the mat with a German Suplex that sends Rosa flipping over and landing back on her stomach with full force. Oceanic covers.
1....... 2.......
Rosa kicks out. Oceanic gives Rosa a Falcon Arrow and tries another pin.
1......... 2........
Rosa kicks out again. Oceanic hits an Asai Moonsault from the second ropes, tumbles to her feet and follows it with a double leg drop across the stomach. She goes for another pin on Rosa.
1........... 2..........
Rosa gets the shoulder up. Oceanic looks to finish off Rosa with an Exploder Suplex but Rosa gives her a thumb to the eye. Rosa hits the ropes and delivers a clothesline to Oceanic, sending her down. Rosa puts Oceanic in a scoop piledriver and goes for a pin.
1........ 2........
Kickout. Rosa points up and begins climbing to the top rope. Rosa begins to stand but Oceanic runs over and knocks her legs out of the way, crotching Rosa on the top turnbuckle. Oceanic sees her opening and carries Rosa from off the turnbuckles and levels her with the Hawaiian Muscle Buster! Rosa looks to be out as Oceanic signals for These Arms Are Snakes. Just as Oceanic is about to apply the hold Gas reaches in and drags Rosa out of the ring where he and HBH check on her. Oceanic gets looks peeved, so she climbs the top rope and jumps off, taking out all three with a twisting cross body. All four are on the mat feeling it but Oceanic is the first up and she crawls into the ring. Rosa staggers up onto the ring apron and Oceanic is there to suplex her in, but just as she gets Rosa up Gas reaches in and trips Oceanic. Rosa falls on top of Oceanic as Gas holds her leg down. The ref counts.
1........ 2........ 3!
The bell rings as Rosa gets up with her arms in the air. HBH and Gas get into the ring to celebrate with her as Rosa is announced as the winner. Rosa, HBH, and Gas stand in a line, arms raised, to the jeers of the crowd. Suddenly a crack is heard and Gas goes down grabbing his leg. Oceanic just gave him a Thai front kick to the hamstring and he's on the mat in pain. Rosa and HBH get out of the ramp leaving Gas behind. Oceanic, super pissed off, locks Gas up in a half crab, making his leg hurt worse. Suddenly Oceanic leaps off and applies a rear naked choke on Gas. He struggles for a bit but ultimately he gets choked out. Oceanic gets up and stands over his unconscious body, leering at the other two. HBH and Rosa back up the rampway, HBH raising Rosa's arm as the winner.
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Ragnal
Game Genie
Yanno what they say: All toasters toast El Dandy
Posts: 8,677,836
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Post by Ragnal on Oct 15, 2005 21:22:51 GMT -5
*Linda Ragnal is backstage with her GND title, watching the match. Michael Cole walks up to her.*
COLE: Excuse me, Linda-
LINDA: Oh, Cole, hi. Haven't seen you since that match with Chocula. How's the body feeling?
COLE: Don't go there. Anyway, you just saw Rosa defeat Oceanic, and just saw a taste of not just ROsa's wrestling skills, but also what Oceanic can do when she's pissed. Do you have any comments?
LINDA: Well, obviously Oceanic's just plain pissed she's not one of the girls I'm looking for in the contender's spot. As for Rosa, I'd say she did a VERY good job tonight. But it's not tonight that matters to me. What matters is the next PPV, when I make my final decision on my first true #1 contender for the Girl Next Door Championship. But for a small reminder, girls...whoever wins will NOT defeat the Ocean's Beauty, for the tides only flow...for ME!
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Post by Ultimo Chocula on Oct 16, 2005 0:06:06 GMT -5
("Poor and Weird" comes over the stadium and everyone groans. Out comes Ultimo from the back and makes his way to the ring, grinning and and making fun of random fans along the way. He gets in the ring and takes the mic.)
UC: "Who wants a nice fat cheeseburger?"
Crowd: "BOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!"
UC: "Vegetarians, eh? Oh well. Welcome, once again, to the high point of your week! You've sat patiently through the curtain jerkers, bored silly, wishing for death. But now is the moment you have all been waiting for! That's right! It's time for Ultimo! All you bootleggers, charge up those cameras! This one's gonna be a lulu!"
Random fan: "Ragnal's going to kick your ass!"
UC: "Your sister gives it up for sailors! Now then! I have faced my opponent tonight once before. Yes, we met many many months ago in a Lion's Den match! In case you missed it, here's a clip!"
(The Toomitron shows the ending of the Lion's Den match between UC and Ken Shamrock. Both men are bloody and bruised. The clip shows UC locking Shamrock in the Earth-Clutch and getting a tap out victory. The clip ends and all eyes are back on UC.)
UC: "Now atsa spicy meat balla! Did you guys see that? I made Shamrock tap out! That's no mean feat! No sir! Hell, even Don West can't believe it, can you Don?"
(From up in the broadcast booth...)
West: "YOU HAVE GOT TO BE KIDDING ME! ULTIMO MADE SHAMROCK TAP OUT! THIS HAS GOT TO BE THE BIGGEST UPSET IN EWT HISTORY! CANYOUBELIEVEITMIKETENAY?!GAAAH!GAAAAH!GAAAAAH!!!"
(Back to the ring.)
UC: "Ok, now shut up you bloated hack. My point is this. If I can make Ken Shamrock tap out, just imagine what I can do to Joe Raggle. That sawed off runt will be selling Mountain Dew from intensive care after I...."
(Suddenly UC is interrupted by Ken Shamrock's music and the crowd pops. Shamrock comes out glowering at UC. He's got a mic and he gets into the ring. His music dies down and Shamrock gets up in UC's grill.)
Shamrock: "Ultimo, you loud mouthed punk! I underestimated you the first time. I admit it. But that clip you showed doesn't tell the whole story. I seem to remember parts of the match where you didn't look so hot. In fact, I have a clip of my own. Roll it!"
(The Toomi tron shows a new clip, this time Shamrock is beating UC big time. The clip includes Shamrock shoving UC's face into the cage, a big belly to belly suplex, and Shamrock applying the ankle lock on UC, who is frantic in pain. The clip ends and the crowd is popping huge. UC looks a little miffed and after a couple moments he retorts.)
UC: "Where did a steak head like you learn to operate a VCR?"
Shamrock: "I wouldn't be cracking wise if I were you. Because in about five seconds you'll be eating your own..."
UC: (interrupting Shamrock) "Alphabits!"
(UC sucker punches Shamrock and the bell rings. UC keeps punching on Shamrock and sends him into the ropes. UC goes for a shoulder block but he's the one who goes down. UC gets back up and runs the ropes for another shoulder block but he goes down to the mat again. Shamrock ax handles UC a few times then sends him into the ropes for a power slam. Shamrock stomps on UC a few times and UC rolls out of the ring for a breather. Shamrock runs out after him and he chases UC around the ring. UC gets back into the ring and waits for Shamrock to get on the apron, then UC superkicks Shamrock off and he hits the concrete hard. UC runs the ropes and flies over the top rope taking Shamrock out hard with the Cannonball Run. UC picks up Shamrock and suplexes him on the entry ramp. Then UC slides back into the ring gloating to the fans and doing the pancake (A stupid dance. Don't ask.)
Shamrock makes his way back onto the ring apron but UC is on top of him. UC springboards off the second rope and dropkicks Shamrock off the apron again. UC goes outside and sends Shamrock into the steel steps and gets back into the ring, egging the crowd on even more. Once again Shamrock pulls himself up onto the ring apron and UC goes over to him. UC tries to suplex him in but Shamrock blocks. Shamrock then picks up UC in a suplex but jumps off the apron sending UC stomach first across the top rope. UC is balanced on the rope as Shamrock slides underneath and grabs UC's legs, catapulting him backwards. Shamrock is still paying but tries for a pin. He only gets two. Shamrock slowly picks up UC and tries for a back elbow but UC ducks and counters with the Bad News Enziguri. UC picks Shamrock up and runs the ropes, taking him out with a Tito Santana style flying forearm. UC goes for a pin. Only two.
UC hits Shamrock with a standing neckbreaker then climbs to the top rope. UC leaps off with a knee sault right across Shamrock's neck. UC goes for another pin but still can only get two. UC snapmares Shamrock into a sitting position and dropkicks him hard in the back of the head. UC pulls down his knee pad and blasts Shamrock with the DeMento Knee Drop. He tries another pin but Shamrock gets the shoulder up. UC gets up and measures Shamrock, waiting for him to get up. Once he is standing UC kicks him in the stomach and gives him a Dragon Buster in the center of the ring. UC signals that it's almost over and he climbs the turnbuckles again. He leaps off the top rope for a twisting splash but Shamrock moves and UC crashes and burns.
Both men stagger up and it's Shamrock on the offensive. He gives UC a back suplex followed by two big elbow drops. He sends UC into the ropes and UC ducks a clothesline but Shamrock responds with a side kick to the gut and a European Uppercut. Shamrock does his yell thing and waits for UC to stand. Once UC is up Shamrock hits him with a belly to belly suplex and goes for a pin. He only gets a two count. Shamrock throws a couple soup bones at UC and sends him into the turnbuckles. Shamrock goes for a shoulder charge but UC reverses into a sunset flip, but Shamrock rolls right out of it and immediately puts UC into an ankle lock. The crowd is going bonkers as UC is screaming in pain and trying to make his way over to the ropes. UC desperately tries to grab the bottom rope but Shamrock pulls him away, still cranking on the ankle lock. UC is looking for any way to break the hold. He stands up on his good leg, twists around and kicks Shamrock in the mush causing Shamrock to release. Shamrock staggers to the buckles and UC rises up on his gimpy leg. Shamrock charges at UC but UC sidesteps and gives Shamrock a Squid Face while running full speed. UC hooks the leg and puts all of his weight on Shamrock's shoulders and gets the three count.)
Lillian: "Here is your winner........Ultimo Chocula!"
(UC gets up and raises his arm. He looks down at Shamrock, who appears to be out cold. UC goes over to one of the camera men and starts talking trash.)
UC: "See that, Raggle? That's just another way I can beat you! I got more moves than Ex Lax! Bring it on, turkey!"
(Ok. Who's next?)
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