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Post by xombiehiphop on May 23, 2007 19:52:11 GMT -5
Announcer: Introducing first in this handicap match..making their way to the ring..Gangrel, Viscera and The Zombie!
Gangrel's theme begins to play as he rises from the flames, goblet in hand. Viscera (in MOD attire, complete with black coat and eye contacts) steps out from the back with The Zombie close behind who groans the entire walk to the ring. Gangrel does his usual ritual of spraying the red liquid into the air before joining up with his team mates in the ring
Announcer: And their opponents..weighing in at 460 pounds..representing The Draugr..Ghost Face and Wraith!
Suppose you were to die tonight..what would you say?
The lights dim and the arena is bathed a red, deep color. Ghost Face and Wraith emerge from the thick fog effect making their way towards the ring. Wraith wastes no time in removing his trench coat, wanting to get things underway. Ghost Face climbs his way onto the apron, kneeling upon as he seems content to let Wraith begin. The lights return to focus and things are beginning to look like Halloween..Wraith quickly rushes Gangrel from behind, pounding away as the match ensues. Backed into a corner, he gives the vampire a few stomps to the gut before whipping him towards an opposite post..Wraith charges in but receives a Back Elbow for his troubles. He staggers backwards and 'Grel takes him off his feet with a Clothesline. He drops a pair of Corkscrew Elbows to the midsection and hauls Wraith up by his hair.
Gangrel measures him with a few punches before running the ropes. However, the green haired freak has enough place of mind to counter his momentum with a Sweeping STO. He looks in a Reverse Boston Crab as Ghost Face scales the top rope and levels the back of the blood suckers head with a Guillotine Leg Drop. Ghost Face makes an official tag and drops Gangrel with a Russian Leg Sweep. He goes for a second but Gangrel elbows his way free and takes him over with a Hip Toss. Gangrel quickly uses this chance to tag the massive Viscera into the ring. Viscera towers over Ghost Face who begins to kick his legs, trying to chop the tree down. Ghost Face bounces off the ropes and as Viscera lunges for him, he slides between his legs. Two feet to the back of the leg takes the big man down to one knee. Ghost Face tries his leg running the ropes once more but this time Vis catches him with a HUGE, spinning Sidewalk Slam. He hooks a leg..
..One..
..Two..
..Wraith breaks it up with a kick to the head before slipping back to his corner. Viscera chucks Ghost Face into a corner and his back buckles. Viscera stampedes forward, looking to squash him with an Avalanche but Ghost Face steps to the side. He uses the ropes to his Vis square in the face with a Springboard Dropkick which staggers the former Ministry member. He tags in Wraith and they take the 500 pounder off his feet with a Running Double Dropkick. Viscera rolls to his corner and The Zombie decides to make a blind tag. He shuffles into the ring, arms outstretched..
The Zombie: GRUUUUUUH!
Clearly not amused by this, Wraith boots The Zombie in the gut. He hauls him up for a Powerbomb, and as he drops him, Ghost Face adds to it by apply a Neckbreaker, effectively completing a Powerbomb/Neckbreaker combo. Dirt flies about the ring from The Zombie's body. Viscera and Gangrel look to help their partner but decide "To hell with it" and drop from the apron. Wraith drops to the mat and places a hand around Zombie's throat for the cover..
One..two..three..
Announcer: ..Here are your winners..The Draugr!
Ghost Face and Wraith continue the assault on the hapless Zombie as "We Die Young" plays in the background. They lay the boots to him before flattening him with the "Zombie Eater" (Springboard Spiked Piledriver).
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Post by Mella Drom Attoc on May 24, 2007 3:09:21 GMT -5
*Cut to next segment*
*Lavish, garish furniture in the background as the camera pans downward to everyone's favorite Diva, Mella Drom Attoc. She's folding her gaudy pink and feathered silk robe up and placing it on a chair behind her, and it's obvious she just came back from shooting 'Evil Twins and Comas'. She's grinning and looking from someone off camera.*
Mella: Darling!
*A man dressed in a very fine, red smoker's robe that would make TJT jealous steps into view.*
Lull: Glad to see you have returned... I hope you got more than what you usually earned.
*All five foot five of the little Miss Pink Princess bounds up and hugs the man. Pink clashes with red in what looks like Valentine's Day's throw up..*
Mella: Darling, of course I did! Today's shooting went splendid!
*The audience cringes at the Madonna-esque British twang set for maximum snootiness.*
Mella: How have you been fairing since my long absence?
Lull: TERRIBLE! Have you seen the food table they have? Why it's not better than common trash! But soon all is gold as we made our in ring debut against some very strong opponents!
*Mella's 'adorable' laughter escapes from her lips.*
Mella: Never fear, for I have called catering. This below-sub par food is not to go into our sensitive stomachs! The place I called was the LOVELY catering service that helped with Cruis's last movie! Also, strong opponents ...hooray! I can finally show my true in-ring capabilities against the wretched Lullabelle Hell!....There's something oddly familiar about that name..."
Lull: I don't see what though.... And I imagine that your next airing will really bring in the dough. I'm seeing Emmy in the future!
Mella: Of course, darling! It'll happen just when Cruis wins his Oscar and you when your much deserved Grammy! I still say you should have won it for your last bit...
Lull: BUT THOSE FOOLS DENY ME YET AGAIN! Oh well... Have you heard about the upcoming Zoom's House Brawl?
Mella: No, actually I haven't. I've been too busy dealing with my wicked, evil twin sister. Oh wait'll you see the episode....it's wondrously fantastic! ....And do explain what I missed about this 'Brawl'.
Lull: OH SHE IS A TERRIBLE BRUTE! HOW I WISH THAT SOMEONE WOULD THROW HER DOWN A SHUTE! *He taps her nose.* Not at all like the embodiment of perfection that is you! Basically, the Scrimmage is meant to decide a new boss for the week. And who would be better to run EWP than Zed Pine?!
Mella: You're making me blush! Of course, that just goes better with my complexion *She smiles a 'dazzling' grin.* Zed Pine as head operator? What else could be more satisfying?
Lull: Why having us on top of WEP, will all the titles and Zed Pine in control of said promotion. IMAGINE THE GAMUT OF EMOTION!
Mella: The stars will shine all the brighter for us! Our names will be in bigger spotlights....and I can get the the head spot to oppose Susan Lucci! That wench has been dirtying my name for years...Oh! You can do everyone's theme music!
Lull: What would be better than to have my platinum tones cover everyone's theme?
Mella: Oh my. How fantastic! Your music notes swirling in everyone's ears like so much heaven.....How perfect!
Lull: PERFECT WOULD BE TO HAVE YOU HOLD THE DNG TITLE IN ONE HAND AND THE DAYTIME EMMY IN THE OTHER!
Mella: With your music in my ears of course. That, my dearest Lull, would be Heaven at it's finest!
Lull: That would be a truly perfect, my darling Mella! I wonder if that has been used before in wrestling... Perfect? I should start using it!
Mella: Perfect doesn't even yet begin to cover your platinum specularity! You rise above the very phrase with your musically-inclined grace!
Lull: And you do as well, with your almost goddess like face!
*She beams up at him, face bright and 'charming' but the reason behind all of the mushy-gushy talk makes the audience feel slightly nauseated.*
Mella: Don't be so sweet!......But please, do go on. You're such a charmer Lull, how I should be so lucky when the rest of the female world wants you....
Lull: I laugh... All women pale in comparison to your beauty and grace.
Mella: And the majority of musicians wish they had a mere iota of your musical ability! Darling, we'll be on top of the world sooner then even Zed can believe! Once my show kicks off more, I'll be Queen of Daytime Drama!
Lull: And soon all will be praising Coming Attractions Productions... Lights....
Mella: Camera!
*In pops Cruis out of nowhere*
Cruis: And Action...
*the camera fades out with Lull and Mella smiling at each other and Cruis walking away*
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Ass Dan
King Koopa
Curious about extra lines
Have you seen me?
Posts: 12,259
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Post by Ass Dan on May 24, 2007 12:55:08 GMT -5
We come back from commercial with the announcer in the middle of the ring and Mike Quackenbush at a side.
Announcer: Ladies and gentlemen, I've just been informed that Joe One will not be competing tonight do to an injury sustained after Crap-A-Mania!!!!
The audience boos some.
Announcer: However, I was also informed that a replacement competetor has been lined up. Introducing first, already in the ring, from West Lawn, Pennsylvania, weighing in at 195 lbs., Mike Quackenbush!
The crowd goes mild, but all the people on the internet go crazy.
¢
£
A
¥
'No One Knows' begins as the audience gets only the second look at the newest member of Minipax.
Announcer: And his opponent, from Cash Mountain, weighing in at 262 lbs., Richard Clay!
Clay gives a smile as the audience gives a sour responce to him. He enters the ring and takes off his vest. The referee checks both men, then sounds for the bell.
*ding ding ding*
The two men circle each other. The internet starts a 'Quack' chant. Clay fakes out Quackenbush by breifly kneeling before getting back on his feet. When Quackenbush moves to counter him, Clay kicks Quackenbush in the jaw. When he reels from the blow, Clay slides into his legs, making Quackenbush fall down. Clay moves quickly to lock in a Bow and Arrow. Quackenbush, however, manages to reach the ropes and Clay is forced to abandon the move. Clay steps back, waiting for Mike to get to his feet. When he does, Richard locks in a waistlock, but Mike is grabbing onto the ropes. Clay manages to pull him away from the ropes, and pulls off a German suplex with a bridge!
1!
2!
Kickout by Quackenbush! Both men get to their feet, but Clay gets the upper hand, giving a Picadilly Cutter to Mike! The crowd boos as Clay gives the 'V' sign with his arms. He kneels down, waiting for Quackenbush to get up. As soon as he does, Quackenbush gets a look of horror on his face as Clay picks him up by his feet, walking to the center of the ring, and landing a Killionare Krunch! Cover!
1!
2!
3!
*ding ding ding*
Announcer: Here is your winner, Richard Clay!
The crowd boos Clay as he gives a smirk to the crowd. He plays to the crowd as we...
*TAKE ANOTHER COMMERCIAL BREAK*
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Rated X
Tommy Wiseau
The following post has been RATED X
Posts: 60
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Post by Rated X on May 25, 2007 16:24:19 GMT -5
OLE! OLE OLE OLEEE!! OLE O-OLLEEEEE!! Sure enough, "Ole" by Bouncing Souls begins to play as EL Generioc comes out to huge cheers. Generico slides into the ring and climbs the turnbuckle pointing to the fans who are going nuts. "Ole" fades out and is replaced by a guitar riff as "America" by Santana & P.O.D. begins to play. Out comes Christian Starr and Melissa Cameron, plying to the fans. Starr sldies into the ring and hops onto the turnbuckle, pounding his chest as Melissa stands in his corner. Starr backflips off and comes face to face with the Generic Luchador as the bell rings. -----Ding Ding Ding!----- As both wrestlers go to lock up, this happens, causing the fans to go wild. Unfortunately for those not watching live, the production f***s up for them, so Generico looks like Human Tornado & Starr looks liek Scorpio Sky. Lazy high school drop-outs. Anyway, Starr runs to the ropes before bouncing off, landing a big knee drop the the throat of Generico. Starr doesn't let up, hitting an Ode to Blitzkreig on the prone Generico. Starr picks Generico up and looks to go for the early finish, signaling for the Rican Bomb. Starr picks Generico up, but at the last second Generico switches it into a hurricanrana, sending Starr flying across the ring. Starr uses the turnbuckles to get up, not noticing Generico preparing for something big. Starr turns around and is met with a big boot to the face, nearly knocking him out. Generico picks Starr up and places him on the turnbuckle, looking to end this right now. Generico goes to hoist Starr up, but Melissa holds onto Starr's leg to prevent the brainBUSTAHH!!!. The ref gets distracted and forces Melissa to let go, but not before Starr hits a low-blow. Starr grabs on to Generico's head before leaping off, hitting the RK-Starr. Starr leans back, applying more and more pressure as Generico tries to get out of the hold. Unfortunately, he's nowhere near the ropes, and is forced to tap out. -----Ding Ding Ding!----- Announcer: Here is your winner, CHRISTIAN!! STARR!!! Starr releases the RK-Starr and rolls to the outside as Melissa Cameron joins him. The two members of Rated X leave as we fade to the next segment/promo/match.
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Rated X
Tommy Wiseau
The following post has been RATED X
Posts: 60
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Post by Rated X on May 25, 2007 17:28:38 GMT -5
Announcer: The following is scheduled for one fall, and it is a finisher's match!! The first person to successfully complete their finisher will be declared the winner!!
"Turn it Up!!"
Scotty 2 Hotty comes out, getting some major cheers from the fans. Scotty hops into the ring and does the worm, getting the fans more riled up.
Announcer: First, from Westbrook, Maine, weighing in at 217 lbs., SCOTTY TOO HOTTY!! The finisher he has chosen is the Worm!!
"HEY!"
"Cool" by Suga Free begins to play as Jesse Nunez comes out, a smirk upon his face. Nunez walks down to the ring before removing his over shirt and slides into the ring.
Announcer: And his opponent, fro Atlanta, Gerogia, weighing in at 218 lbs., he is "The Human Hurricane", JESSE NUUUUNEZ!! The finisher he has chosen is The End!!!
Nunez stares at Scotty, who's still to busy dancing to notice. Nunez just sighs before running staright at Soctty, hitting him with a POOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOUUUUUUUUNCE-uh! that sneds him into the turnbuckle. Scotty slumps down as Nunez gets a smirk on his face, hitting the House Party (those kicks that Human Tornado does) before hitting the kick to the crotch. Nunez pops up and grabs Scotty by the hair before lifting him up, going for what seems to be the Hell Bound. However, Scotty manages to slip out and delivers a solid dropkick to the bak of Nunez's head. Scotty gets up and lands a variety of elbow shots to Nunez's temple, trying to wear him down. Nunez manages to avoid an elbow and get behind Scotty, going for a release German suplex. Scotty manages to land on his feet and quickly kicks Nunez in the back of the knee before running to the ropes and hit a facebuster. Scotty pops up and holds his arms out, prepping himself for the Worm. As Scotty hops on one foot, Nunez turns to the fans in the front row and makes a "shhh!" gesture before lying back down. Scotty does the Worm (the dance, not the move) and is aout to hit the chop when Nunez catches it and quickly turns around, locking the Cobra Clutch before hitting the lungblower. Nunez quickly turns around and starts to aply pressure as the ref calls for the bell.
-----Ding Ding Ding!-----
Announcer: Here is your winner, "The Human Hurricane" Jesse Nunez!!
Nunez releases the hold as soon as the bell rings, victorious. Scotty gets up, holding his neck in pain as Nunez extends his hand in a sign of respect. Scotty seems unsure, but Nunez says, "The match is over." Scotty accepts, and the fans start to cheer as Nunez raises Scotty's hand. Fade to next segment.
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Post by Redface: Dispenser of Justice on May 25, 2007 20:19:36 GMT -5
*The shot opens in hallway backstage of the EWT arena where We see Redface Rodgers walking, enjoying a bottle of Diet Coke plus (it's like regular Diet Coke, but with vitamins an' *Bleep!*). He is in his own little world when suddenly Candy Girl jumps out at him from an intersecting hallway.*
Candy: Redface! A word!
*The surprise causes Rodgers to do a spit take--all over Candy Girl. She looks at him with disbelief while he remains indifferent. He finishes his soda and speaks.*
Redface:...you shouldn't have caught me off guard like that...*loud burp, followed by casually tossing the empty bottle forward, which bounces off Candy Girl's head and lands on the floor with a clatter.*
Candy: *visibly upset, almost about to cry* ...I can not believe you did that...
Redface: That's what happens when you sneak up on people...you...ya get sprayed with backwash...
*Candy begins crying loudly*
Redface: God....There there...I'm...I'm sorry *rolls his eyes*
Candy: I can't believe you did that! *sob* All I wanted was a stupid interveiw *sniff* and you spat on me! *sob*
Redface: YOU SCARED THE *Bleep!* OUTTA ME! *Bleep!* WAS I SUPPOSED TO DO? GIVE YOU A *Bleep!*in' HUG?!!?
*this causes Candy Girl to cry louder*
Redface: Jeeeeez...I'll make it up to you...I'll get you a Diet Coke plus!
Candy: *livid* DIET COKE?!!? *sniff* you spit on me, then you call me FAT?!!? *breaks down sobbing*
Redface: Wha...? No! It's delicious! It's got vitamins and *Bleep!* I'm, not calling you fat! You look great! Nice tits and everything!
*whoops*
Candy: YOU ARE SUCH A JERK! *Shoves her mic into Redface's chest cavity, knocking the wind out of him* WAIT UNTIL MY BOYFRIEND HEARS OF THIS! *she storms off*
*Redface looks on in confusion. he looks at the mic, shrugs, and begins speaking into it.*
Redface: *in his best Triple H impression* I HAVE SOMETHING TO SAY! *chuckles* Let me be serious for a moment. I'd like to..."compound the current happening within the EWT"...dunno why, I just had the urge to speak those three-dollar words. Coming soon, is the EWT's PPV: Toom E's House Party III featuring the Ragnal Brothers, back in action! *yawns loudly* But, what I'm excited about, o'course, is the TLC Rumble! Now, I'm never one to boast, but what with my incredibly rich background of backyard wrestling, I doubt anyone can step to me in any aspect of any kind of match of that caliber. I'm sure you--Yes, you at home. You. watching--You're wondering what are my intentions if by chance I did win the rumble and gained control of the company? Nothing fancy, I assure you. Except to *Bleep!* over those who I think need a good *Bleep!*in' over. The Wrestle Posse, Minipax...TJT in particular...It won't be the Same old *Bleep!*, I assure you.
*He scours his brain for more topics*
I hear Ultimo Chocula is retiring! Ah, if I had tears, I'd shed them; But I make it a point not to cry over spilled milk...or broken garbage, in this case. Any, Chocula, I wish you best in all your future endevors. By which I mean, "Happy trails, You smurfing Gimp!" And Speaking of people who are limp, Voltiguer: If your watching this...If you even know to work a T.V: I just want to voice my distaste in having you as a champion. You may have bested the concrete ring, but you have not bested me! Enjoy your time as Toolshed champ, because While I'm on duty, Euro trash such as yourself won't last long here. If you think I'm afraid of some errand boy for the illmunati, THINK AGAIN! I'll beat you, and your precious order to a PULP! All you are is Euro Trash, and in my country the trash always gets thrown away once a week!
*throws down the mike and walks away* **Fade to black**
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Rated X
Tommy Wiseau
The following post has been RATED X
Posts: 60
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Post by Rated X on May 25, 2007 22:29:28 GMT -5
Fade in to see Chad Michaels & Mike Corral, along with the rest of Rated X. Mike looks to be meditating as Chad, Marcus, Jesse, & Christian are talking about the upcoming match.
Marcus: I still can't believe we got left off of the TLC Rumble. I thought we signed up for that!
Christian: Funny, all I remember is us arguing about what food to eat.
Jesse: Speaking of which, I could relly go for some tacos right now.
EVeryone turns to look at Jesse, who looks oblivious to it all.
Chad: Well, look. It does suk that you uys got left off of the Rumble, but me and Mike have something more important to focus on.
Christian: What could be more important than CONTROLLING the company??
Mike: The Ragnal Brothers.
Christian, Marcus, & Jesse: Ohhhhh.
Chad: Me and Mike have to take on the Ragnals at House Party 3. And believe me, they're no push-overs. Hell, they've been tag team champs TWICE.
Mike: Not to mention Mike Ragnal is the current heavyweight champion.
Marcus: Well, that sucks.
Chad: No s*** Sherlock. Look you guys, me and Mike are going to be busy preparing for the Ragnals, so you guys are on your own for now.
Marcus, Jesse, & Christian all look at each other, confusion on their faces.
Mike: It's for the good of Rated X. Chad and I need to put 100% focus into preparing for the Ragnals, and we can't do that if we're having fun with you guys. No offense.
Jesse: None taken bro. Just do what you gotta do, and we'll take care of business.
Chad: That's what I want to hear. Now, you guys wanna go out, hit the town one last time before House Party 3?
Christian: Sure, why not.
Marcus: Sounds good to me.
Jesse: I'm down.
Mike: I'm in.
Chad: Good. Come on guys, let's go.
Rated X exit the locker room as we fade out.
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Lily-Rose
Mike the Goon
Rockin' All Night.
Posts: 42
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Post by Lily-Rose on May 25, 2007 23:02:32 GMT -5
*The camera fades backstage, Thunder & Jupiter in their wrestling gear, and Terina in her usual street clothes. Jack is with them as well, also in his ring garb.*
Thunder: ...and Jason, when ya listen to that CD, it's twenty kinds of awesome!
Jason: I doubt it. I've heard it was all hype, no material. Like they're--
Terina: Washed up?
Jason: Exactly.
Thunder: I don't know, I think they're pretty good. You could do worse; you could do better.
Jack: O rly?
Jason: *sigh* Dammit Jack, do you have to--
*All four of them set their sites on Lily-Rose, coming down the hallway. Lily stops for a second, placing her hands on her hips, smiling at the tandem.*
Lily: Hey guys. Whatcha talking about?
Thunder: Well hey hey, who do we have here, the little lady rockstar, how's the high life treatin' ya?
Jupiter: I can't tell if you're serious or not, Jim.
Jack: I like her.
Jupiter: Jack, you like ANYTHING with a--
Thunder: I was serious. Even if I wasn't, there's no way you're worse than those bubbly idiots...Coming Attractions Productions.
Jupiter: Point taken.
*Lily laughs and rolls her eyes*
Lily: Yeah, I don't get those guys either. Bunch of hacks who can suddenly wrestle. At least I have a background in MMA.
*she pounds her fists together*
Terina: MMA, you say? Reeaaaally?
Lily: Yup, it's true.
Terina: Hmmmm... *rubs her chin* Jim, Jason, Jack...you three J's mind going to listen to your CD and leaving us two be?
Jupiter: Um, sure thing Teri.
Thunder: You got it, babe.
Jack: ANYTHING for you!
Thunder: ...now, where was I?
*The three men trun about and depart, walking down the hallway and muttering something before disappearing from camera's view.*
*Lily just watches the three watch off, and then turns back to Terina.*
Lily: So, that Jack, he has a nice butt, hm?
Terina: Wha? Jack? Not Jason? That guy keeps in great shape...
*Lily shakes her head and giggles, patting Terina on the shoulder*
Lily: Oh come on, you mean to tell me Mr. Cocky Ass is a better brewed drink?
Terina: I'd think so, myself. He's pretty nice when you get to know him!
Lily: Mmhm...so how loaded is he?
Terina: You mean cash, right?
Lily: Of course.
Terina: Cracked over a hundred fifty million, his family business did. He's by far the poorest of us three, but his family only started it out twenty years ago, and they're growing fast. Jim on the other hand, billions in his pocket.
*Lily nods, then scratches her chin.*
Lily: And what happened, exactly? You just saw him buy a Hummer and said "Take me?"
Terina: Two words about his family business: Fuel company.
Lily: Right. Well, at least he learned to wrestle on the side. I figured taking up martial arts and kickboxing makes a girl look good on the stage, you know?
Terina: That's true. I just sort of joined them one day. I don't know why they did it originally, but they squeeze wrestling in. Running a shipping company, myself...I have to fill out tons of paperwork. *sigh*
Lily: Well, you have me there. The worst I have to deal with are the record producers telling me to sing stronger when I already am.
Terina: Singing stronger.....haha, Jimmy and Jason don't do that enough times...
Lily: Really. Gets to your ears much?
Terina: No no, they sing a lot. They're not bad by any means. We love metal though, so they play air guitar. WITH sound effects. *giggles*
Lily: Nice. But can they actually play?
*Without explanation, Lily grabs an item off screen, which happens to be an electric guitar. Lily plays a rocking beat, which happens to be the first twenty bars of Evanescence's "Going Under". After she finishes playing, she places the guitar off screen, and signs to Terina, "Ya like?"*
Terina: I guess. I'm the bigger fan of Evanescence than them, though. If they heard it, they'd be all like "No no, that's NOT music! NOOOO!"
*Lily just laughs.*
Lily: Seriously, I like anything hard and dark.
*Lily then looks out to space...eventually realizing what she said.*
Lily:......That came out wrong.
Terina: I think you'd like Thunder then. *laughs*How'd I know that? Well, that's what he says...
*Lily groans and shakes her head*
Lily: You know, it's amazing. I've heard you were a necronomicon, but so far, I haven't seen that in you. You seem to be an okay person.
Terina: Thanks for-- *frowns abruptly* Wait. Who the hell told you that?!
Lily: That guy.
*Lily points over to Carlito, who's eating a powdered doughnut while speaking Spanish to Super Crazy.*
Terina: If I knew Spanish, I'd go read him the riot act--just for him and Porky over there. Sadly, being British and Swedish by nature...Spanish doesn't come so easy to me. I'm a little rusty. Anyway...
*She walks over to Carlito, yells at him, and hits a hurricanrana on him.*
...AND IF YOU DO ANYTHING BACK TO ME, MY TEAM OF FOURTEEN LAWYERS WILL SUE YOUR ASS TILL YOU CAN'T EVEN EAT APPLES ANYMORE!
*Lily looks at the downed Carribean, wide-eyed, arms crossed, then to Terina with an open jaw.*
Lily: That. Was. AWESOME.
Terina: Oh...reeally?
Lily: Compared to a girl who's best moves are submissive, yes. But still, how often do you see a guy get his ass owned by a girl.
*Lily stops and thinks.*
Lily: Nevermind. I just remembered Oceanic beat that Ragnal guy for the Tri-State title.
Terina: Oh yeah. Welll...I'm not going to go for such a title. No problem with women wrestling men, but we've got to give them the same opportunity to achieve success as us. Not their fault they're not quite up to snuff.
Lily: I hear you. I've done a few shows for UFC, and they needed to put me against men because all the girls were booked. My record at the time's 14-1, 8 knockouts.
Terina: I've tried MMA. Once. I won, but I don't like it. I prefer wrestling.
*Lily nods*
Lily: It's cool. I thought I could give wrestling a shot. Though, with eight knockouts, I think you'd be a little afraid.
Terina: I'll tell you this, wrestling is MUCH different. It's not as head on. You've got to go out there and prove regardless of size, regardless of strength, you're better. And a wrestler can destroy an MMA fighter when said fighter has no choice but to wrestle.
Lily: As far as I'm concerned, if you can make people tap, you're good as a technical wrstler.
Terina: I can make people tap as well. I'm all-around considered good, but since most women are all very similar in size, I chose high-flying ability. I can fly. And kick. And punch. And make people tap out. Ever seen me use the Orb Weaver, or the Bird's Nest of Pain, or any of my other holds?
Lily: A little, yeah, all good moves. But you know what? How about we do this? I know House Party only has two matches, and not others are being allowed, how about we do this. Next PPV after HP, you and me. Submissions match.
Terina: You? I'm always up for a challenge. My match at Crapamania !!!! was less than successful, but I believe I have ALREADY proven my worth. YOU'RE ON!
Lily: Good.
*She offers her hand to Terina to shake on. Terina extends her hand as well, grasping it and shaking.*
Terina: And maybe...you can talk to Jimmy and Jason...and they can tell you exactly what the best style of music is.
*Lily lets go of the shake, and then slowly backs off, waving.*
Lily: It's official. See you then, Tear.
*She waves and turns around, walking off in the halls*
Terina: Yeah....I guess. Once again, I've got another chance here to prove myself.
*Carlito starts to get back up. Only to be speared by a returning Thunder.*
Thunder: Jack and Jason are listening to that CD and they said they're getting some smokes...so uh, what'd I miss?
Terina: ...stuff.
Thunder: Stuff?
Terina: Stuff.
Thunder: Oh. Gotcha. Well, let's get outta here. The nightlife awaits...
*The two walk off, as the camera fades out.*
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Boku AKA Da Green Guy
El Dandy
WC's Resident Pirate Otaku and Official Scapegoat
Always and Forever, Hurricane.
Posts: 8,371
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Post by Boku AKA Da Green Guy on May 25, 2007 23:47:26 GMT -5
*Cut to the WP locker room.*
Axel: So Jobby, got anything big planned today?
Jobby: Nope...
Axel: You...sure?
Jobby: Yep.
Axel: Ah, that's cool then.
Jobby: WAIT I KNOW!
Axel: Oh?
Jobby: THE CABANA IS HAVING A 80s DANCE PARTY! AND I'M LATE!
*Jobby runs out of the room.*
Axel: *sigh* I don't see why I'm surprised... *smirk* Nothing ever goes my way in the first place... Why should my birthday be any different...
*rattle*
Axel: What the? Where's that shifting coming from?
*rattle*
*Axel stares towards his locker as he has figure out the source of the sound. He inches close and tries to figure out the contents of the locker by staring into the holes. Suddenly, the locker bursts open, as Zeleke jumps out, wearing nothing but a sash saying "Salutations to Birthing" which thankfully covers everything up... as he looks on with a rather manic grin.*
Axel: WHATTHEHELL?!
Zeleke: OH YOU BEAUTIFUL BIRTHED BABY... most of congratulatoriness goes to you amigo... for you have sucessfully ageded without withering into soul-less dust! Many kudo to you!
Axel: .....Why aren't you wearing any clothes?
Zeleke: Silence... those cloth slave drivers, I have freed myself temporarily from their grasp... before they destroy everything I be! Not that it is of concerning to yourselfness.
Axel: Yeah, I think I'll agree with that... How.... How long have you been in my locker?
Zeleke: About 26 half days, I heard through the vine of oats your birthing was today... so I was determined to surprise! I manage to forage inside that locker,surviving on stuff I found inside and reading these odd magazines I found. THOSE ARTICLES WERE ABSYMAL!
Axel: Yeah, well that's why you mostly just look at the pict.... 26 HALF DAYS?!
Zeleke: Yes... why are you of alarm at that? I once camped in a dumperation chamber for two monthenings when I was evicted from my living apartment!
Axel: But there wasn't even any food in there!
Zeleke: Nonsensity... that whole book was chockful of snackings!
Axel: YOU ATE MY MAGAZINE!?!
Zeleke: Sure... it tasted quite dry, I've had much better before.
Axel: Well this is just great! First nobody remembers my birthday but you, in your indecent glory, and then you eat the cooking magazine! THE ONE THING that was given to me by and reminds me of my sister before she was zombified!
Zeleke: ... YOU CAN MAKE BEINGS UNDEADISH?!
Axel: No.
Blastation! I always wanted to hold onto my own cranium...
Axel: I say your about one more screw away from accomplishing your goal... WHY THE HELL AM I TALKING TO YOU!?!
Zeleke: Well then... perhaps i shan't give you this fabulous trinket I claimed for ya.
Axel: ....*closes his eyes and sighs* What trinket?
*Zeleke hmmms, diving back into the locker and digging around, pulling out a large hideous puke green box, wrapped up with a pink bow*
Axel: Nice....wrapping...
Zeleke: Thankingness... I found it at my place under a pile of stuff.
Axel: ...
*Zeleke grins again, shoving the box in Axel's arms now, looking on quite intently... crouching down*
Axel: So, I should open this then?
Zeleke: IF YOU CAN HANDLE THE GIFT'S SPLENDOR!
Axel: Now I'm afraid to... Oh well.
*Axel unwraps the box, half expecting Faboon or some other oddity to pop out. There seems to be quite a few things actually in the box, as Zeleke just keeps looking on*
Axel: A half of a tennis ball?
Zeleke: Yes... much more challenging to use than that overrated round type!
*Axel drops the ball and goes to put the box down.*
Zeleke: What are you doing... there's is a more plentiful harvest awaiting inside the cube!
Axel: *sigh* I'm surrounded by them... *he reaches in and pulls out a crumpled up newspaper* Wha?
Zeleke: I was going to throw that away... until I had the thought you could probably use the thing. Perhaps as a hat?
Axel: Right... *he tosses the paper aside and pulls out a ketchup covered picture of Faboon* Why this?
Zeleke: The fool wasn't using that priceless item... I simply decided to give it a better home. The red sauce is there because... well, it was before I found your yummy book.
Axel: Ugh, I hope this is the last thing. *He feels around* Guess not... "EWT DVD HOME VIDEO PRESENTS: The Best of Eric Rush"? Who? *Axel opens the DVD case* There's nothing in here!
Zeleke: I was going to get you the best of the Ultimate Lawyer instead, but of the nerve, THAT MAN IN THE TRENCH COAT WAS CHARGING 200 Dubloons!
Axel: ....Last thing, I hope... *he pulls out a nice looking hoodie that he might even wear* Well, at least this is decent.
Zeleke: Yes... I thought so too. That canine only soiled it once... so I deemed it wearable.
Axel: *Dropping it to the floor* Nevermind. *feeling around* Feels like money? You wouldn't. *He pulls out a wad of money alright.... Monopoly Money* Of course not.
Zeleke: NOW YOU CAN PURCHASE ALL THE BALTIC AVENUES YOU COULD POSSIBLY DREAM OF OBTAINING!
Axel: Oh joy. *He goes to lower the box but hears something rattling in the box, he reaches in and pulls out a very shiny gold watch* ....Wow, I don't know what to say....
Zeleke: *looks over and quickly takes it back, to the bewilderment of Axel* Oh no wait... not sure how that entered... that was intended as tribute to the swans.
Axel: *blank stare* Now, I do... GET OUT OF MY ROOM!
*Zeleke shrugs, turning around and cartwheeling out of the room, the sash falling off in the process, now left in Axel's locker-room... as a loud feminine scream is heard.*
Lean Gene Cummbund: MY VIRGIN EYES!
*Meanwhile, Faboon just happens to stick his head in Axel's room*
Faboon: I HAVE BROUGHT A BEAUTIFUL TROPHY FOR YOU AS WELL!
Axel: Let me guess, it's a box filled with dog crap.
Faboon: ... WHO INFORMED YOU?!
Axel: GET OUT!
*Faboon walks away, dropping this box full of various knick knacks, all shaped like dogs*
Axel: And take the box with you!
*Faboon runs back over, grabbing said box and dumping everything all over the floor, before quickly running off*
Axel: If that isn't symbolic of my day, I don't know what is.
“Ew....”
*Axel's attention snaps towards the doorway, where a street clothed Juri stands. She looks at Faboon's “presents” with disgust. Axel's eyes catch a pink box that she is holding.*
Axel: What's that?
Juri: Something for you... It came to my locker room for some reason, so just knew that I had to bring it otherwise I would fired for some stupid thing like that.
Axel: *seeing through the lie* I see... Shouldn't you be in a dress, otherwise you'll be fired that way?
Juri: I'm still waiting for my package. Anyways, take this. I have better things to do then still near a pile of crap and this dog poop.
Axel: ...fine. *he takes the box as she darts away.*
*He opens it to see a chocolate cake with a broken rose on it. He lifts his shades as he looks toward the door... It is an odd mix of sorrow and happiness.*
*Cut to commercial.*
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Post by DieShiguya on May 26, 2007 11:07:12 GMT -5
*Camera flashes blankly. Then a pure white room can be seen. Nothing else except the outline of a person can be seen. From the angle and due to the brightness of the room, it’s hard to tell if the person is male or female.*
Person: *inaudible murmuring*
*The camera pans closer, and it flashes again. This time, the room has gone pitch black, but the outline is now in white.*
Person:….*The audience can hear a whisper, but nothing more*
*The camera gets even closer, and sudden movement sees the figure raising it’s head, and staring at the camera, the face can’t be seen clearly.*
Person: *The voice is very quiet, but melodious once you can hear it* ……People. I am not welcome in very many places anymore…but….soon enough, you shall see why I picked EWT as my own. I have a curse, a burden to bear, but here…it won’t get in the way. Here, I can finally show the world…why I exist. Soon enough….soon enough….If only you listen to the voice….*The voice is male, but very musical, and very light…*
*the camera steps jerkily away as the figure stands up, seemingly unfolding his long body and reaching toward towards the camera. The light flickers between black and white, distorting the figure’s facial features, and then goes completely static.*
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Post by teamireland on May 27, 2007 14:35:07 GMT -5
Team Canada's theme plays as Lance Storm & Elix Skipper march out to the ring with Major Gunns closely behind. Gunns carries with her a Canadian flag.* David Penzer: The following Tag-Team contest is scheduled for one fall, introducing first, making their way to the ring, being accompanied by Major Gunns, at a combined weight of 456lbs, Lance Storm... Elix Skipper... TEAM CANADA!*Storm & Skipper enter the ring. Strom takes the microphone from Penzer's hands.* Storm: If I can be serious for a minute... *Crowd Boos* Storm: The men we are dur to face tonight are people I have NO respect for. A bunch of drunken, loud-mouthed yahoos? Coach O'Hare's team of degenerates may be highly skilled athletes, but their behaviour is sickening & totally unbecoming of anyone in this industry! They go & parade themselves around like fools... Is this supposed to be an example to our young fans? I come from Calgary... *He pauses dramatically as the crowd boos some more* Storm: ...Alberta, Canada. There we have repectable heroes. Men like Stu Hart, Bret "The Hitman", myself, even. Who would be considered national heroes in Ireland? That drunk songwriter Shane McGowan? George Best, the soccer player who drank himself to death? Do you want your children to become like... *Storm's rant is cut off as the opening strains of Dropkick Murphys' "I'm Shipping Up To Boston" begins to play over the PA system. At the upbeat of the song, Aidan Donnelly & Sean McCann enter from under the Toomi-Tron with Coach O'Hare following closely behind waving his Tricolour wrapped Hurley.* Penzer: And their opponents, being accompanied by Coach O'Hare, at a combined weight of 396lbs, proudly representing their home country of Ireland, Aidan Donnelly & Sean McCann... TEAM IRELAND!*The Green, White & Gold, pyro of Team Ireland explodes at the top of the entrance ramp. O'Hare, Donnelly & McCann make their way on down to the ring. McCann & Donnelly discarding their Team Ireland shirts as they do so. They race into the ring.* DING-DING-DING! *McCann is met with a Crescent kick from "Prime Time" while Storm manages to evade a running Dropkick from Donnelly. Storm whips Aidan to the ropes & catches him with a back body drop on his return. Skipper exits the ring & waits on the apron; when he's back on his feet, Sean does the same. Storm & Aidan continue to clash inside the ring. Aidan rocks Storm with a European Uppercut & follows up with a vertical Suplex. Aidan stands over Storm's shoulders & leans in to pick him up. Storm surprises Aidan with a sudden Small Package. Aidan manages to barely kick out after 2. Aidan gets to his feet & he & Storm lock up in a collar & elbow tie-up. The stronger Storm gets an advantage & forces Aidan back towards the ropes. The referee gives Storm the ol' 5 count & Storm releases Aidan... but then socks him in the jaw shortly thereafter. Aidan smashes Storm in the face with a stiff forearm shot & whips the man from Calgary to the ropes. Storm rebounds & Aidan nails him with an overhead Belly-to-Belly Suplex. Storm pulls himself up using the ropes, but Aidan grabs Storm from behind, putting an arm around his head. Aidan drags Storm to the middle of the ring & prepares to drop Storm with a Reverse DDT. Storm works his way out of it & hits Aidan with a Nortehrn Lights Suplex...* 1... 2... KICKOUT! *Aidan must be slipping. That's twice now that Storm has nearly pinned him! Aidan & Storm are both back on their feet. Aidan whips Storm off towards a corner. Storm quickly scales the ropes & launches himself backwards hitting Aidan with a reverse Flying Elbow. Storm rolls to his own corner & makes the tag to Skipper. Skipper launches himself into the ring & begins unloading on Aidan. He whips Aidan off to the ropes. Aidan comes back with a clothesline attempt. Skipper does a "Matrix" to avoid the move. Aidan is left slightly confused. Skipper gets to his feet again & kicks Aidan in the back of the head. Aidan is reeling. Skipper attempts to go for "The Play of the Day", but Sean launches himself into the ring & takes "Prime Time" down with a Springboard Cross Body. Sean then drags Aidan over towards the Team Ireland corner & lifts Aidan's limp arm to tag himself in.* *Sean runs at Skipper & hits him witha Tornado DDT. Sean runs to the top rope & seems to be aiming for the "810 Degree Splash". Major Gunns gets on the ring apron & shakes the ropes. Sean loses his balance & crotches himself on the turnbuckle. Skipper gets to his feet & climbs onto the ropes himself. He goes a little "New School". He walks the ropes from the Team Canada corner over to where Sean is sitting in pain & performers a Frankensteiner from the ropes & into the ring. Skipper goes for a cover, but Coach O'Hare has the referee distracted by mouthing off at the official from the ring apron. Major Gunns attempts to distract O'Hare in turn by shaking her big fake rack a little bit. O'Hare starts paying attention to Gunns & the referee turns back to see the cover...* 1... 2... KICKOUT! *Sean is fortunate that O'Hare & Gunns provided as much distraction as they did. Skipper hits the mat with his fists in frustration. He picks Sean up & holds him up for a delayed Suplex attempt. Sean kicks his legs to get out of his predicament & manages to reverse the Suplex into a Tornado DDT. Sean scrambles to pin Skipper...* 1... 2... STORM BREAKS IT UP! *Lance Storm stomps on Sean's back, forcing him to give up his cover of Skipper. Skipper gets to his feet & aims a kick at Sean's head. Sean catches Skipper's foot & spins him around. Sean then lands a dropkick to Skipper's chest. Sean brings Skipper to his feet & tosses him off towards the ropes. Skipper hits a Quebrada Press on Sean...* 1... 2... KICKOUT! *Skipper picks Sean up by the hair & whips him towards the Team Canada corner. Before "Prime Time" can make the tag Aidan Donnelly comes charging in. Storm stops Aidan with a springboard Flying Clothesline. Storm continues to pound on Donnelly while Skipper sets Sean up on the top rope. Once Skipper has McCann placed where he wants him, he calls Storm over, presumably with some double-team move in mind. Aidan quickly recovers though & charges at Storm from behind dropkicking him into Skipper's back. Skipper & Storm are somewhat dazed; Sean leaps from the top & nails Skipper with a Hurricanrana! Aidan, meanwhile, drags Storm back to another corner. Aidan climbs to the middle rope & hooks Storm's arms for "The Guinness Hangover". Major Gunns gets on the second rope & grabs Aidan's head smothering him in between her enormous breasts. Coach O'Hare yanks at Gunns' leg & drags her off the ring. Aidan shouts angrily at O'Hare as he was quite enjoying himself. Gunns screams at O'Hare. O'Hare clocks Gunns with his Hurley & tells Aidan to concetrate on the match!* *Storm has regained his senses. He punches Aidan in the stomach & lifts him off the ropes for a suplex. Lance holds Aidan in the air for a while before turning the move into a Powerslam. Storm gets up again, but Sean McCann stops him in his tacks with a Lung Blower. Sean whips Skipper off to a corner & rouses Aidan. Aidan gets up & Sean whispers to him. Aidan gets under Skipper & picks "Prime Time" up on his shoulders. Sean grabs Skipper's head & runs up the turnbuckles completing "The Electric Bread Slicer". Sean goes to cover Skipper, but Storm runs crashing into them before the ref can even count. Storm scales the ropes & gets to the top turnbuckle. Borrowing a trick from Major Gunns, O'Hare shakes the ropes & Storm's grapefruits get crushed. Aidan is beckoning Sean to help him out. However, as the ref is admonishing O'Hare, Major Gunns sneaks in the ring & drops Sean with a facebuster, she shakes Skiper into semi-conciuosness & Skipper covers. The ref takes a little look around & sees Skipper covering Sean...* 1... 2... AIDAN BREAKS IT UP! *Just barely in time. Aidan returns his attention to Lance Storm who Missile Dropkicks the Irishman. Aidan gets back on his feet & charges at Storm. Storm rolls through, however, & traps Aidan in the "Canadian Maple-Leaf". Aidan reaches out, frantically grasping for the ropes. Sean & Skipper are still down. O'Hare is chasing Major Gunns around the ring. Gunns runs back into the ring & right into the ref. While the ref is distracted, O'Hare slugs Storm & Aidan takes advantage. Aidan grabs the dazed Storm from behind & hits him with a release "Dublin Suplex". Then he sets a still dazed Skipper on the top. Aidan gets a barely there Sean up & the two perform the "Flight of the Earls" on Skipper, landing on top of Storm! Dragging Skipper off of Storm, Sean makes the cover on "Prime Time". O'Hare holds Major Gunns back outside the ring...* 1... 2... 3!!! DING-DING-DING! Penzer: Here are your winners... TEAM IRELAND!*"I'm Shipping Up To Boston" plays once again as Team Ireland celebrate their first victory in a while. O'Hare plants a smacker on Major Gunns who backs away in disgust. Team Ireland continue to celebrate the whole way up the ramp as Gunns tends to Storm & Skipper.*
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Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
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Post by Deleted on May 28, 2007 0:37:00 GMT -5
*The camera fades into what is the lockerroom of TJT, the team and Jack sitting and watching TV, Jack pressing a button every second before any audible sounds can be concentrated.*
Jack: No........no......
*switches channel a bit more as Jason raises an eyebrow in frustration.*
Jason: Alright, Jack. PICK SOMETHING!
Jack: Nothin' on.
Terina: Jack, you know, if there's nothing on TV, you could at least go do something else so we can watch something.
Jack: No, no reason to.
Thunder: Why's that, kid?
Jack: Donno. Something good might come up.
Thunder: Ya said that half an our ago. *sighs*
Jason: Could you at least pick something?
Jack: Eh.
Terina: Well then, could you give us the remote? For me? *smiles at him*
Jack *blushes and gets sweaty*: Eheh....um....er...*scratches back of head*....uh....well......there.......wooo....whahuh....yeeeeeeaaaah.
*Drops the remote and gets up, slowly walking for the door. Just as he reaches it to leave, he hears footsteps aprroaching...*
Familiar voice: *Muffled by door*
jack: Huh?
Jason: Answer the damn door, Jack.
*Jack opens the door to reveal Christopher Indigo, now out of his bandages!*
Jack: Uh, hey Chris.
*Jack departs*
Indigo: Christopher!
*Away from the foyer, TJT can be heard in the main room.*
Terina: Hey Christopher!
Jupiter: Hey man!
Thunder: What's the word, cha--er, former champ.
Indigo: *Shoving past Jack* The news is plusbad, equal. BB was doubleplusunsatisfied with my performance at Crap A Mania. BB warned that the next time myself or Joe One were to fail him on a doubleplusbig scale again, he made subtle reference to punishment involving a Memory Hole.
Jupiter: I hear that a lot, and despite my best attempts to analyze it, there is nothing I could conclude on the subject.
Indigo: Party members understand the subject completely, it both motivates and chills. But BB still gave me the best healthcare and rehibilitation available. Also, while I was doubleplusmad about losing the Toolshed Title, I remembered something that One told me: "Minipax is not about losing your cool". But that's not why I'm here. I'm here to both congradulate you for representing Minipax in a doubleplusgood manner these past few weeks, and I'm also here to deliver a message.
Terina: What's that?
Indigo: I'm here to let you know that in the war on the proles known as Rated X, your efforts must be intensified if we are to succeed.
Terina: There's bigger targets than Rated X.
Indigo: Plusbig targets?
Terina: I would hope so.
Jupiter: It would be a crime against humanity if they were a big threat to us.
Indigo: They aren't plusbig threats, but they will stand in our way of BB's acquisition of EWT at House Party 3.
Thunder: Hmmph, we're not going to be in the TLC Rumble.
Terina: If you haven't noticed, we've set our sights on some other targets.
Thunder: The World Champion Mike Ragnal, and his followers the Cidal Squad! I consider them to be more important. Certainly Rated X might slow Joe One down...
Jupiter: On the other hand, we might just be able to achieve victory against our title-holding rivals.
Terina: The unpinned team of Thunder *points to Jim* and Jupiter *points to Jason* are just about at Number One Contendership. Not just yet, but they're SO close.
Jupiter: We'll get all three of those belts if you, Joe and Clay cannot.
Indigo: It matters not which of us within Minipax get the titles, we outnumber the Cidal Squad proles 7 to 4. Speaking of said proles, I understand you have a handicap match with their mentor this week.
Terina: Mike Ragnal would be making a big enough mistake wrestling one of my two men here. *Thunder and Jupiter both crack a smile*
Thunder: Yeah, the Champ doesn't stand a chance.
Terina: But what's worse than one? Two! And not to mention, I'm accompanying them.
Jupiter: He must truly be shortsighted to want to wrestle us both. This should not be much of a challenge of course, however I believe that we'll need to expand our goals.
Terina: As you know, the reach of TJT vastly outweighs that of the rest of Minipax. Not only is there us three, but there's Jack, as well as that monster I discovered, the Midnight Mystery.
Indigo: Indeed Minipax is a force. That's why we must use this force this week against Ragnal. If we can cripple Ragnal, then the Cidal Squad will unexist.
Thunder: Two against one...HAHA! We've got this in the bag.
Jupiter: You said it. Now Christopher, I find it funny that you, who couldn't even keep your Toolshed Title from a--
Thunder: Crazy Knight Guy!
Jupiter: --is telling us what we should do.
Indigo: You know, you two have doubleplusknowledge on the subject, tell me about that match of yours against Team Ireland for the Tag Titles.
Terina: We could argue with you about the pot and the kettle, but I reeeeeeeaally don't think that's necessary.
Indigo: The proles Rated X and the Cidal Sqaud would us to crumble like this. But what they fail to realize is, Minipax is more than a force, Minipax is omnipotence, Minipax is destiny, whether they choose to accept it or not. Now, victory may be inevitable for you two, but the unexistance of the Cidal Squad will not be unless Ragnal is out of the picture. That's why my plan is to "attend" the post match celebration, victory will only be iminent.
Jupiter: I.....see.
Thunder: Sweet! NOBODY is going to doubt us after this. And the tag title shot will be OURS!
Terina: Mister Indigo, I think Rated X and the Cidal Squad have met their match...
*The camera fades out.*
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Ragnal
Game Genie
Yanno what they say: All toasters toast El Dandy
Posts: 8,677,836
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Post by Ragnal on May 28, 2007 11:40:41 GMT -5
*The camera fades into the EWT arena.*
Finkel: The following contest is a HANDICAP MATCH....scheduled for one fall! Introducing first...
*The lights go out, replaced by flashing strobes and multicolors as "Peace Sells" by Megadeth blasts over the speakers. Greeted with booming jeers and boos, the Jaguar rolls out onto the stage, signifying none other than TJT. Thunder and Jupiter hop out, sporting their black leather trenchcoats, jewelry and sunglasses, and help out Terina, in her usual jeans, top, boots and accessories. She takes a position between them and they make their way down the ramp, seeming unusually happy.*
Finkel: Being accompanied by Terina, from San Diego, California, weighing in at 456 pounds....T...J...T!
*Instead of throwing out the usual insults, the trio strut down the ramp in their positions, showing rather flashy grins. Upon reaching the ring, Thunder and Jupiter seperate from Terina, walk to opposite sides of the ring, and after striking a few poses, slide in with perfect synchronization. Terina hops up onto the apron in a sitting position, and lifts up both arms, Jim and Jason pulling her up to her feet and opening up the gap in the ring ropes for her to get in. Still holding her hands, she raises them up as the two men point to themselves, kissing her hands and separate, each going to a turnbuckle and now insulting the crowd before hopping back down. As they begin to settle down, the music dies down and the lights revert to normal. Terina gets back outside the ring, taking a position at the closest corner to Jimmy and Jason.*
*Ragnal slides into the ring and charges at the two men of TJT, immediately attacking both before they can even get their entrance gear off, lefts and rights sending Jupiter reeling back and Thunder adazed, Ragnal then grabs Thunder and whips him into a corner, charging at him with a dropkick...Thunder is caught squarely in the chest, but as Ragnal gets up, recieves a forearm shot to the back of the head from Jason. Ragnal falls on his knees and grabs his head, but unfortunately allows himself to get hit by a leg lariat from Thunder. Immediately the two men of TJT begin to stomp away. Unfortunately, Ragnal can't get to his feet due to so much stomping. Thunder switches to the torso, dropping elbow after elbow as Jupiter goes for the ten stomps of pain, using uncannily accurate stomps to both knees. Ragnal pushes his upper torso off the ground, in an attempt to stand up. The ref attempts to direct Thunder and Jupiter to a corner to help prevent the assault. As his back is turned whilst arguing with Jim and Jason, none other than Terina climbs onto the apron, looking around fiendishly, and flipping over the top rope, dropping a leg across the World Champion's face. Ragnal reacts by flailing while he covers his pain-stricken face, and tries to get to his feet over in a corner.Terina immediately slides back outside, adjusting her rather clumsy boots as the ref turns around Thunder takes a corner next to this recent action, and Jupiter simply walks over to Thunder. As he goes to pick him up, Ragnal slaps away Jupiter's arms and kicks him in the gut, and follows with a gutwrench DDT.*
*Ragnal ponders what to do next. If he chooses to go for the pin, he's risking a run-in. Thinking on his feet, he drops back to the mat and locks in a front facelock, tightening it every time Jason tries to pull out. Ragnal keeps the hold in until Thunder pulls Mike by the leg, forcing him off Jupiter. With Ragnal off of Jason, Jim retreats back to his corner, the ref admonishing him as Jason gets right back to Ragnal, pulling away at his eyes using his fingers, gnarling against the brow of the EWT World Champion. Ragnal places his hands on Jupiter's arms to pull them away from his face, to no avail. He decides to kick him in the gut instead, accomplishing it. As Jupiter stumbles back, Ragnal blinks rapidly, hoping to get his sight back--and it couldn't have come and a more opportune time, as he sees none other than Jason coming at him. Quickly he grabs him by the head, and after a short test of strength snapmares him to the mat, dropkicking him in the back of the neck shortly thereafter. Ragnal drops an elbow down and covers.*
1!
2!
Kickout!
*Ragnal kicks at Jupiter's ribs and then picks him up by the hair, throwing him into a corner. Ragnal charges at him for a spear, but with speed on his side, Jason holds onto the top ropes and pulls himself up, the shoulder of Mike going right into the ring post. Jason flips down over him, going for a rollup...*
*He rolls Ragnal completely, but the ref only counts to one before Ragnal falls out of place. Jupiter kicks Mike in the back, which causes the World champ to yelp out. Jupiter then runs to the ropes, and dropkicks Ragnal back down to the ground. He picks Mike up and whips him into his corner, tagging in Thunder. As the ref prepares to send Jupiter out of the ring, Thunder grabs the ref's attention with what appears to be him pulling out a foreign object, hidden in his fist. As the ref attempts to get him to open his clenched hand, Jason forces Mike into the corner he tagged Thunder in from. Between the ring post, Ragnal stuck in the corner, Jason grabs both of Ragnal's arms, and placing his own right foot on the ring post, pulls on both arms. As Ragnal yelps in pain, the referee continues to try to open Jim's hand for what is about thirty seconds--until Thunder opens up. Nothing in his hand. Laughing it off, the referee turns around to check on Ragnal, seeing nothing but a pained champion as Jupiter stands innocently nearby. Ragnal tries to regain his strength, but Thunder doesn't allow it as he grabs Mike's legs while Jupiter gets into the corner. Thunder then pulls Mike out of the corner, making him land hard on his back onto the canvas. Keeping both legs held, Thunder slowly tilts him over, locking in a Boston Crab. Mike tries to crawl for the ropes, but Thunder tightens the hold, trying to hold Ragnal back. After a minute, Ragnal is within reach of the ropes, and tries to grab the bottom one...*
*Immediately Jupiter hops into the ring. The referee shifts his attention to him, just as Ragnal gets to the ropes. As he holds on, Terina climbs up to the apron, stomping on both hands as Thunder piles on the leverage. Jupiter retreats back out of the ring, and Terina drops back down. Thunder walks forward to the center, keeping Ragnal from trying another ropebreak. Mike, tempting not to tap, grabs his hair to keep from tapping. After a minute and a half of that, Mike looks ready to tap...but instead pounds his fist into the mat every few seconds. After two minutes, Mike reaches out to grab Thunder's legs...Shifting his weight, Ragnal is slowly able to shift the move--Thunder losing his grip and Mike's adrenaline kicking in. After a painfully slow minute of change, Ragnal has the crab reversed--and being in the center of the ring, none of Jimmy's allies can help him here. As he tries to claw his way out, Jim remains immobilized...Ragnal decides to do something new and jumps up while holding onto Thunder's legs, landing his butt hard on Jimmy's back! Mike then lets go of the legs and rolls him over to pin.
1!
2!
Kickout! Capitalizing, Ragnal stomps the legs a few times and drops a knee into the back, grinding it in for good measure. Picking Thunder up, he whips him into the ropes. As Jimmy races back, blindly going for a clothesline, Ragnal ducks and hits a drop toe hold, quickly flipping around and locking in an armbar. Thunder is able to drag himself to the nearest ropes, just barely out of reach. It looks like Thunder's about to tap, until Terina climbs onto the apron. The ref spots her, and argues with her to get off. Jupiter takes advantage by getting in the ring and putting mike's left arm into a Half Nelson, forcing the hold off his partner. Jupiter follows up by faceplanting the Elementalcidal wrestler into the mat, then walking back to his corner. Terina gets off the apron, and the ref sees both Mike and Thunder down. Thunder gets to his knees, as does Ragnal, the two shaking off their pain. Thunder luckily hobbles over to his own corner and tags in Jason, Mike barely missing his quarry. As Jason rushes over, Ragnal gets a foot up right in Jupiter's face, tumbling him down to the mat. Turning Jupiter over, Ragnal applies a wristlock but as he gets it in, Jason ascends to his knees and attempts a snapmare that gets blocked--but he converts it into a headlock, both stuck to the mat. Ragnal tries his hardest to break out of the headlock, trying to push Jupiter's arms off of him. With that having little effect, Mike then elbows Jupiter in the gut, until the headlock is released. Mike then runs to the ropes, and leaps up for a flying clothesline...and gets it, knocking Jason back down. Shaking his head for a moment, he then runs into the ropes and bounces off, hitting a senton splash. He goes for the cover...
1!
2!
Jason gets the shoulder up! Rather than go for an immediate move, Ragnal decides to wait for Jupiter to get to his feet. Once Jupiter's up, Mike looks ready to lock in the Shock to the System...Jupiter notices and tries to evade it--but to no avail! Ragnal gets the Shock to the System locked in, Jupiter furiously trying to break out of it. As he yells in pain, Ragnal notices Thunder getting into the ring. As he and the referee turn to face him and hold him off, he does not notice Terina creeping into the ring from behind. Just as Jason seems ripe to fall apart at the seems, Ragnal notices a sharp pain--a low blow courtesy of the forearm of Terina. Instantly she retreats back out as he drops down, releasing Jason. Thunder gets back to his corner, and Jupiter tags back to him. Both take a side facing him and lift up, double suplexing him to the mat. After the impact of the suplex, Ragnal rolls out of the ring, trying to regain his momentum, and grabbing at his aching back. However, Thunder climbs outside and picks Mike up while his back distracts him, and connects him with a gustbuster! Thunder picks Mike up and rolls him into the ring. Thunder then climbs to the middle rope and leaps off with a fist drop! THunder hooks the leg to pin!
1!
2!
Ragnal gets a shoulder up! Thunder makes the tag to Jupiter, and whips him into the ropes opposite of Jason. As Mike runs back, Jason hotshots him against the top rope, and Terina makes a motion to Thunder. Thunder runs full speed at Ragnal, leaping up to drop a knee across his back, but instead bounces onto the ropes as Ragnal manages to slide out of the ring and recuperate. Thunder has a look that can simply be described as "OH MY GOD, I BROKE THEM!" He then falls flat on the mat, while Jupiter gets to the outside and goes to attack Ragnal. Instead, Ragnal chops Jupiter against the chest, and then lifts him up for a gorilla press, then dropping him ribs first onto the steel barricade! Ragnal next climbs onto the apron and leaps off for a guillotine legdrop...IT CONNECTS!!! As Jason lay on the floor and Jimmy in the ring, Ragnal turns his attention to the only person in TJT not downed...And smiles sinisterly at Terina, who backs away from Mike. Mike then runs at her, which causes Terina to run around the ring once...twice...three times...and then slide into the ring and runs to a corner. Ragnal then runs at her looking to spear her against the turnbuckles...Unfortunately for Ragnal, taking him from the side is Thunder, still clutching at his groin before the Champion can even get to the corner. Terina rolls out of the ring and screams "KILL HIM!" making an unorthodox gesture. Thunder nods, steaming, and unleashes a Thunder Blaze of punches, the rapid, hard strikes forcing Ragnal into the corner. Thunder hits what is over fourty punches before the referee threatens to DQ the team if he continues. He forces him out of the ring as Terina rolls Jason in...With Ragnal in the corner, Jupiter sets him up on the top turnbuckle, and throws five punches into him. He then grabs hold of Mike and hits a TOP Gravitational Fury! Jupiter covers to pin!
1!
2!
Ragnal with the foot on the rope! Jason gets up, pulling at his hair as Thunder simmers in the corner and Terina can be heard shouting "NO, NO!" Jason grabs Mike by the hair and picking him up, tags Thunder. Jupiter climbs to the nearby turnbuckle as Thunder sets Ragnal up on his shoulders for An Explosive Solution. Just as Jason leaps off the turnbuckle for the torpedo dropkick... Ragnal leans forward and rolls Thunder up for a victory roll! Jupiter misses Ragnal completely, and hits the canvas hard! Ragnal grabs hold of Thunder's legs and pins.
1!
2!
And Jason scrambles to his knees, hitting Ragnal with a double axehandle and making him release before the referee can get to three.
1!
2!
*Jupiter gets to his knees, only to be hit with a clothesline from Ragnal. As he rolls out of the ring...Ragnal picks Thunder up and hoists him onto his shoulders, and spins him around to finish the Ragnalrok...It connects! Thunder is dropped hard and Ragnal hooks the leg. The referee begins the count.*
1!
2!
THUNDER GETS HIS FEET ON THE ROPES!
*Or rather, thanks to Terina, who right as the ref had his eyes off of the downed man from TJT, maged to place his feet on the bottom ropes--certainly avoiding a pinfall. Just as Ragnal gets up, yelling at the ref for missing it, Jason Jupiter slides in and hits a side backbreaker on Mike, then helps Thunder get to his feet. Jupiter warns Jimmy that they need to use this opportunity right now to finish the match. Thunder nods, getting the idea, and picks Mike up, positioning him for a crucifix powerbomb while Jason prepares to hit Mike with an inverted cutter...and THUNDER HAS STRUCK TO JUPITER! Jimmy gets on Ragnal to cover, but as he does, in come Johnathan Doe and Andy Duke! As soon as Duke and Doe slide into the ring, Jupiter gets to his feet, and followed by a dazed Thunder, confronts the two, both factions hitting each other simultaneously. The referee calls for the bell...
Finkel: Here are your winners by disqualification...T...J..--
*Thunder and Jupiter and the Cidal Squad continue brawling, the two men from TJT getting pushed back. Out of steam, Jason helps Thunder out and with Terina helping them up, slink away, shouting obscenities and threats at the tag champions--and Mike Ragnal, as he is helped to his feet by Duke and Doe. The Squad then heads to the ropes, holding their titles high to remind TJT just who they're dealing with. They each then proceed to give them a one finger salute as TJT walks up the ramp, continuing their threats. As they reach the stage, Terina points to the fatigued Thunder and Jupiter, who both make an outline of the tag titles around their wastes, before fiendishly smiling and disappearing behind the curtain. The camera fades out.*
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Post by Hulkshi Tanahashi on May 28, 2007 13:49:57 GMT -5
Comedian: Hi, I’m “The Comedian” Bobby Riggs. I’m a wrestler in EWT. I like hard rock, the movie Chinatown, and Asian women. I just recently came to EWT, but I haven’t had a lot of success. So, to turn that around, I have decided to get a manager. But, now I gotta one. So, the question is WHO’S GONNA MANAGE ME!!!!? *A short montage of the Comedian training and wrestling is shown while cheesy rock music is playing, ending with the Comedian pouring water over his head.* Comedian: WHO’S GONNA MANAGE ME!!!!? Announcer: Presented by Dr. Pepper. *The Comedian and some doctor with white hair and a beard walk into a room with all the contests standing there in a hospital gown.* Comedian: Okay, before we begin with the competition, I need to know if you all are physical healthy to compete. So, you will all take physicals administered by Dr. Hoshenphifer. Doctor. Dr. Hoshenphifer: Danke schoen. I am Dr. Franz Hoshenphifer und I vill be administrating ze physicals you all vill be taking. So, I vill need you all to disrobe immediately. Comedian: But, they’re already in hospital gowns. Dr. Hoshenphifer, yelling and spitting: I CAN SEE DAT NOW!!!! Comedian, whipping spit from his face: Okay, just gimme the news not the weather. Dr. Hoshenphifer: Now, who vill be ze first wictim…I mean, participant. Comedian: We’ll start with the Doctor of Thuganomics! John Cena: Could you not call me that? Comedian: No! *Cena and Dr. Hoshenphifer walk into another room. From the room, we hear Cena yelling and screaming for a few minutes. Then, Cena and the doctor walk out; and Cena has look of anguish on his face.* Cena: Oww…oww…oww! Comedian: So, how was it? Cena: It hurts when I walk. Comedian: Okay. Terina, you’re next! *Her face goes completely red, as her eyes dart around.* Terina: Do I really have to...ya know...take off my clothes in front of this creep? *Points to Hoshenphifer* Comedian: Do you want to win this contest!? Terina: Actually, yes I do. I would however prefer to have my personal physician involved. Not him. Comedian: TOO BAD!!!! IT’S HIM OR NOTHING! Terina: FINE!! I'll do it. *She walks with Dr. Hoshenphifer walk into the other room. After they're in, he shuts the door--but the door can be heard opening, followed by two pairs of footsteps.* Dr. Hoshenphifer: Hoo are you? *The sounds of inaudible yelling can be heard as Hoshenphifer yells something in distress. After a heated organization of noise, the two pairs of footsteps can be heard again as they trail off. Hoshenphifer and Terina walk back into the room with Riggs and the other participants. Terina is smiling as the Doctor is visibly shaken.* Dr. Hoshenphifer: Er...vshes vine. Comedian: How was it? Terina: I feel like a radiant sun, as usual. *flashes a toothy grin* Dr. Hoshenphifer: Vese two...Zunder and Joopitah came in and--*elbow nudge from Terina*--um...vestled a good match, she said. Yah! Yah! Comedian: Alright, Harry Caray, you up next. Caray, walking to the room: Okay. Hey doctor, is it possible to turn yourself into beer? Dr. Hoshenphifer: Vhat kind of stoopid es dat!? *The doctor closes the door. Then, we hear Caray yelling “Oh God,” “Damn! That’s cold!”, “My ASS, my ASS!!!!”, and “Cubs Win! Cubs Win!”. Then, the doctor and Caray walk out.* Comedian: How was it? Caray: If you went to the moon, how much cheese would you eat!? Comedian: What!? Caray: You know the moon; it’s made out of cheese! Comedian: No, it’s not. Caray: Really! Whodathunkit!? Comedian: Alright, Mr. Anonymous, you’re up! Anonymous: Uh....I don't think I should go. I have...certain features...that could be...uh...incriminating. Comedian: What!? No one’s going to arrest you! GET IN THERE! Anonymous: Ack! *Riggs pushes Anonymous into the doctor's office. There is a breif pause.* Dr. Hoshenphifer: Sweet mother of mercy! *Anonymous quickly runs out of the office, slamming the door behind him* Comedian: How was it? Anonymous: I think he saw my tattoo. Comedian: What tattoo? Anonymous: This tattoo. *Anonymous rolls up his sleeve, revealing a tattoo that is mosaiced by the network.* Comedian: WHAT THE smurf!? Anonymous: No further questions! *Anonymous runs off* Comedian: Don’t worry! I don’t want to ask you any more questions! Okay, next is Sandra Worthington. Sandra, with a scared look on her face: Do I have to? Comedian: Do you want to win? Sandra: Yes. Comedian: Then, GET IN THERE! *Sandra slowly walks into the room. Dr. Hoshenphifer closes the door. Then, we hear Sandra moaning and yelling “Don’t stop!”, “Yes, right there!”, “That’s the spot!”, and “OH MY GOD!”. Then, the door opens, and Sandra walks out with her hair ruffled and a joyous look on her face.* Comedian: How was it? Sandra: Do you have a cigarette? *The Comedian pulls out a carton of cigarettes and a lighter from his pocket. Sandra takes a cigarette, and Riggs lights it for her. Then, she takes a puff, blows out some smoke, and walks back to where she was.* Comedian: Next up is Principal Pain! *Pain lowers his glasses, giving the Comedian a flabbergasted look after watching this last scene, before glancing back at the door* Pain: You've got to be joking... then again, you are the Comedian. So I'd expect this, still... I'll go along with this I suppose. However, if that unqualified quack in there dares to touch me like that, I'll end his medical career with a swift lawsuit! *Pain walks slowly into the room, arms folded as enters. He emerges a few moments later, quickly snatching robe back up and putting it on quickly, giving Riggs a bit of a displeased look.* Comedian: So how was it chief... Pain: NONE OF YOUR DAMNED BUSINESS! *Pain quickly moves back and FAR away from the door, mumbling something under his breath.* Comedian: Alright, Michelle McCarthy is next. Michelle: Whatever. *Michelle walks into the room, and Dr. Hoshenphifer closes the door. For the next few minutes, we don’t hear a sound. Then, Michelle walks out. Comedian: How was it? Michelle: Okay. Not as bad as these wimps made it out to be. Comedian: Ha Ha! I like you. Okay, last but not least, Coach O’Hare, you’re up! O'Hare: Aye, it's no problem. I've been playing GAA since I was a wee lad, like. No bother here. Comedian: But what about those allegations I heard? O'Hare: Huh? Comedian: Y'know, about the juice? Someone told me that you were using AND supplying to guys in... O'Hare: It's LIES... ALL OF IT! LIES! Comedian: So, what? Your guy Shane Malone is naturally just that big? Okay! O'Hare: That's just favourable genetics! Comedian: Yeah, I'm sure Scott Steiner & Batista say the same thing... Now get in there! *O'Hare enters the doctor's room. Some quiet mumbling can be heard. Then some yelling. The words can't be heard clearly, but it's obvious O'Hare is quite angry & possibly scared of something. After that, some loud crashes are heard. O'Hare comes running out of the doctor's office with a "Deer in the Headlights" look on his face. We can see the doctor lying on the ground, a broken wooden chair on top of him.* Comedian: So, how was it? O'Hare: Do you know what he tried to do to me? Blood samples I have no problem with... but SPERM SAMPLES?! Comedian: Okay…so, Dr. Hoshenphifer, how long will it take for the results? Dr. Hoshenphifer: I don’t know. Comedian: What!? You don’t know!!!! You’re a doctor! You’re suppose to know! Dr. Hoshenphifer: I KNOW NOZING!!!! I VAS NOT AT AUSCHWILTZ! Comedian: Okay, well, we’ll let you get to processing or whatever. In the meantime, who wants waffles!? *Everyone raises there hand.* Comedian: Let’s go! *Everyone leaves and comes back two hours later. The contestants are standing around in the doctors office, and then the Comedian walks in with the results.* Comedian: Okay, I have the results. You all are healthy. *Everyone shows a sigh of relief.* Comedian: However, there are some things I should note. Mr. Caray, apparently, your blood is pure gravy. Caray: Really!? What kind? Comedian: Brown. Caray: Do think I could have a drink? Comedian: I don’t know how you’re still standing or breathing, but you’re doing it somehow. And, I admire that. Anyway, Mr. Bad, Bad Man! Cena: Dammit! Will you stop with the John Cena references!? Comedian: No. Anyway, you have Chlamydia. Cena: Damn! I knew that necronomicon was lying. Comedian: Don’t worry! I know how you feel. Cena: You’ve had Chlamydia. Comedian: Oh, GOD NO! And, finally, Coach O’Hare, you are surprisingly clean. O’Hare: What’s that suppose to mean? Comedian: Ever been to San Francisco? Ever see a Giants game? Ever meet Barry Bonds? O’Hare: What? Comedian: Oh, don’t lie! You’ve been there. You’ve visited Balco! O’Hare: That’s A LIE!!!! Comedian: No, THAT’S A LIE! O’Hare: I’m not standing for this! *O’Hare begins to leave.* Comedian: Fine, leave! In fact, all of you LEAVE! *Everyone walks away.*
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Indigocrates
Unicron
I got bored. Decided to become a philosopher. Just 'cause.
Posts: 2,953
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Post by Indigocrates on May 28, 2007 17:01:06 GMT -5
*Christopher Indigo is seen wlaking down a hallway, clearly irate about the match with Ragnal and TJT. he goes to check the matchboard. He looks over the board, then scans it closely for a second look. A look of shock overtakes his face.*
Indigo: .......I'm not booked!
*Suddenly, a voice behind Indigo catches him off guard.*
Voice: I'm not booked!
*Indigo turns around to see Dennis Stamp! Indigo pays no attention, until an angry voice off in the distance booms:*
Voice: AND THESE T-SHIRTS ARE TOO TIGHT TOO BILLY!
*Lex Luger approaches Indigo, irate about the stae of his shirt. Indigo is unsure of what to make of this, then he hears an angry foreign voice:*
Voice: I will break your back, make you humble, and then, f*** your ass!
*Indigo looks to see the Iron Sheik! Indigo, even more confused, starts to back away from the scene. The individuals approach Indigo and start spouting off more remarks.*
Stamp: I'm not booked!
Iron Sheik: *Rambles incoherintly*
Luger: Can you afford to pay me to wrestle around!? I DON'T KNNNNNOOWWW!
Indigo bolts away to escape as the men chase him, continuing with their non-sequiters as we cut to next segment.
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Post by The Bad Man on May 28, 2007 17:21:36 GMT -5
Back in the ring and already Jimmy Jacobs and Tyler Black have arrived and been introduced. The fans are fairly indifferent to the team. From the speakers that horrible organ music begins to play.
THE FINK: there opponents, hailing from Bad Axe, Michigan ... at a combined total weight of 830lbs ... They are Big & Bad!
Out from the back walk the two giant monsters of EWT. They head to the ring under asea of boos from the fans. Mr. Big doesn't care for the fans opinions and Mr. Bad remains as grotesque as ever.
JOSH MATTHEWS: Hello everyone I'm Josh Mattews and I'll be calling this match. Big and Bad are tow of the most feared men in EWT and I still believe they have unfinished business with Raftshack.
The Bell Rings
As Mr. Big stands on the apron Mr. Bad hurries forward in his own unique waddling style and crahses into Tyler Black. Tyler falls to the mat and Mr. Bad splashes him there and then. Cover ...
1 ... 2 ...
Jimmy Jacobs leaps off the top turnbuckle and nails Mr. Bad with a legdrop, which has no effect on the pinning move at all!
3.
The Bell Rings
JOSH MATTEWS: Good grief that was quick these two young men have been beaten easily! Uh-oh!
Jimmy Jacobs is still trying to remove the blubber whale that is Mr. Bad off of Tyler Black when a large hand grabs him by the throat. Jimmy Jacob looks up into the pitch black sunglasses of Mr. Big. Mr. Big naisl Jimmy Jacobs with a nasty 'HFD' as Mr. Bad gets up from the literally squashed Tyler Black. The crowd boos as the organ music starts up again and they walk to the back.
(Cut to promo for the Colossal Coliseum)
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Post by The Midnight Mystery on May 28, 2007 18:21:25 GMT -5
*The camera fades into the ring, Kanyon and Chris Hero both standing inside. Suddenly “Ain’t Coming Home” by Silvertide blares over the speakers and out walks Jack Jupiter, with the Midnight Mystery behind him. Holding a microphone, he stops on the stage and the music dies down.*
Jack: Now as many of my realists have known…*boos*…by…er…my cousin and his best friends, that would be TJT *more boos* finished wrestling Mike Ragnal in what we thought would be an easy victory for them. Sadly, interference ended the match too soon and my buddies are in the back steaming. I need to go talk to them right now, so the big guy my……friend….Terina…*he blushes*…brought in…that would be the Midnight Mystery haws volunteered to take care of BOTH of these guys in a tag match! Haha! So Midnight…what do you have to say about that damned Cidal Squad and their mentor, Mike Ragnal?! *the mention receives boos as well*
*The Midnight Mystery leans down, holding his head just above the microphone and clears his throat.*
Midnight: ZEEAHF….BLOPOOPA…CIADANALSAKANAGRAL…DENTAAAAAAAAR~!
Jack: Harsh words.
*The crowd goes dead.*
Jack: I SAID…HARSH WORDS!
*Minor boos*
Jack: In any case, I’m off to go hang with the true aristocrats of the company—TJT—and Midnight, please don’t pull a muscle. I’m your partner, but I’m walking out, so if you get hurt and pinned, we both lose. Otherwise, we both win. Ta-tah!
*Jack drops the microphone and walks backstage as the Mystery cracks his knuckles and walks down to the ring. As he slowly climbs over the ropes, both Kanyon and Chris Hero charge at the big man, hitting him with rights and lefts. Shrugging these off, he singles out Kanyon and launches him into the nearest turnbuckle. With Kanyon in it, Midnight turns around and hits three bionic elbows on Chris Hero, dropping him to the mat. Walking away from the turnbuckle, the Mystery suddenly turns back around and runs at full speed, nailing a Yakuza kick right in the jaw of—who better than Kanyon? The just-damaged Chris collapses down in the corner, and the Midnight Mystery turns around, Chris Hero getting up to challenge him. Before Hero can really even hit one punch, Midnight grabs him by the throat, lifting the squirming indies star eight feet in the air before chokebombing him back down. Just to make sure the damage has bee done, the Mystery lifts up the downed Kanyon and press slams him out of the ring before turning back to hero and locking in a Midnight Death Grip. Chris lasts for almost two minutes, trying to power out. But every time he does, a headbutt sends him back down. Finally, he taps out, the efforts of escape futile as the Midnight Mystery immediately lets go and slides out of the ring.*
Kaelin: Uh…here are the winners by submission…the team of the Midnight Mystery…and Jack Jupiter.
*Midnight heads up the ramp and raises both arms…*
Midnight: GUWAAAAAAAAGA!
*…before dropping them and heading backstage. The camera fades out.*
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Post by crauswell on May 28, 2007 19:55:34 GMT -5
UltraBlack Mantis's theme starts up, the crowd giving him a decent amount of heel feat as he walks down the rampway, his two minions not present along with him it seems.
Announcer: The following contest is scheduled for one fall! Approaching the ring, from the Black Tea Garden, weighing in at 206 pounds, Ultramantis Black!
Black quickly climbs into the ring, backing up and watching for his opponent. Soon enough, the old Broken Wings starts up, as he enters from the back.
Announcer: And the opponent, from Parts Unknown, weighing in at 272 pounds... Crauswell!
Crauswell walks down the rampway, reaching over and trying to slap hands with the fans, but the fans choose to pull back instead, as the furry looks a bit confused, as does the crowd, giving a slightly mixed reaction, but still booing overall. The furry steps into the ring, looking across at UltraBlack, who looks back. The bell sounds soon after, as Crauswell walks to the center of the ring, calling for a lock up. Mantis walks over and... instead smacks Crauswell right in the face! The furry looks back over, answering with a thrust right to the throat! Mantis staggers back, as Crauswell unloads, hitting some stiff body blows, backing Mantis into the ropes, then sending him off, catching and launching him into the air, then catching again and driving him down with a Samoan Drop! Mantis groans, rising back up, clutching at the back, as he turns around, swinging and hitting with a fist of his own. He unleashes a few more, staggering Crauswell, then running off the ropes, leaping for a Cross body, only to be caught by the furry, who quickly spins around, launching him with a fall away slam! Mantis groans, rolling, quickly getting back to his feet, Craus charging and leveling him in the face with a running knee, sending him back down. He then pulls him back up, lifting him up for a Back-breaker across the knee, before attempting a cover. 1....2 UltraBlack kicks out.
Crauswell simply lifts his opponent back up, delivering some clubs to the back, hunching Mantis over, then running off the ropes, going for a scissors kick, which Mantis avoids, moving out of the way, bouncing off the ropes, then hitting a jumping knee to the beak, before bringing Craus down with a Brainwashing (Complete Shot)! Craus groans, as Mantis rises back up, sitting the furry up and delivering some nasty kicks to the back of the head, then pulling him up further, unleashing a few forearms know to the face. He then snap-mares him to the mat, coming off the ropes for a dropkick to the face! Crauswell goes flat on his back, as Mantis simply goes for a cover. 1...2. Crauswell easily powers out.
Mantis seems a bit annoyed, as he pulls Crauswell back up again, grabbing for a bulldog and charging, only for Craus to throw him off in mid move, Mantis however rebounding off the ropes, coming back and catching Craus right in the face with a spinning wheel kick! He groans, hitting the mat again, quickly trying to rise again, as Mantis quickly takes advantage, kicking him in the face, then leaping atop, clinching of La Safarita (Octopus Stretch)now, as Craus groans, soon feeling the effects of this submission, as Mantis stays balanced atop, continuing to apply pressure. Crauswell starts to push up now, using his greater weight and size, pushing Mantis onto his back now, managing to stand, then drop him for an electric chair drop! Mantis's masked face bounces hard off the mat, as he groans, writhing on the mat. Crauswell shakes off the effects of the submission, easily pulling Mantis up, clinching on a Sleeper, driving some knees into his back as he does so, Mantis groaning and writhing in pain. Crauswell quickly swings him around, launching him overhead with his signature Sleeper Suplex! Mantis slams hard into the mat, clutching his chest, as Crauswell walks over now, grabbing around the waist, pulling him off the mat, into a German Suplex, bridging for the pin! 1...2...
NO! Mantis manages to kick out. The furry looks down, trying to restrain himself from snapping and obliterating his opponent, managing to do so for now, as he pulls Mantis back up, hitting a nasty standing lariat, turning Mantis inside out, as he drags him over to the top rope, quickly ascending himself, then leaping off and Taking Flight! He connects, Mantis grasping his chest in pain, as Craus sits back up, quickly getting to his feet, pulling his opponent up, grabbing him by the waist and charging, driving him back first into the turnbuckle, UltraBlack gasping in pain, as the furry sets him atop the turnbuckle, delivering a swift kick to the skull to keep him dazed, then leaping atop, grabbing and setting him up onto his shoulders, then leaping off the top hitting a sit-out muscle buster from off the top! The crowd looks on at this move in shock, as Mantis goes limp, Craus pushing him off and making the cover. 1....2....
3!
This one is most certainly over. The crowd gives a slightly less negative mixed reaction this time as Craus grasps slightly at his back, rising up and looking down at Mantis, who is most certainly out.
Announcer: Here is your winner... Crauswell!
Crauswell walks over to the referee, nodding, as he shrugs, raising his hand in victory, then walking over, reaching down and simply shaking the unconscious UltraBlack's hand, as Broken Wings starts up once again, the furry simply waving to the crowd, walking back up the rampway, as we fade to commercial.
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Post by dorf on May 28, 2007 23:15:51 GMT -5
*We return from commercial as Kris Krude enters the ring....he goes into the ropes underneath ala Melina style getting disgusting looks from the crowd.*
*Dorf's music plays, "Cancer" by Filter*
*Dorf comes out to cheers as he brings out the cheese sandwich! He tosses the melted sandwich into the audience as they scramble its hot and toasty yumminess....dorf struts down the aisle normally and enters the ring fine. Howard Finkel with the mic...*
Finkel: On the red corner, weighing in at 227 and one-quarter pounds, from Reading PA, KRIS KRUDE!
*Crowd boo's and starts up a "you fat f***" chant*
Finkel: And on the blue corner, weighing in at 270 pounds, from Filthadelphia, PA, DORF!
*Crowd cheers as dorf pulls out another Cheese sandwich and bites it!*
Bell: DING, DING, DING!
*The two immediately lock-up as Kris Krude shoves a thumb in dorf's eye when things were not going his away asap. Krude walks to the ropes and uses it for leverage and then runs as fast as he can to hit a Clothesline onto Dorf! He then sticks his elbow out to execute a Bionic Elbow Drop, but dorf moves out of the quick enough.*
*While down, dorf stomps onto Kris Krude to keep him down, but he is unfazed for the most part as gets up slowly. Once dorf realized that was not working, he runs to the ropes and attempts a Clothesline onto Krude. Krude just laughs as he says "AGAIN!" Dorf does so, but instead of a Clothesline, he ducks under and hits a drop Toe Hold onto Kris Krude and covers him!*
Referee:
1!
2!
*Krude kicks out!*
*Dorf says "THAT'S IT!" as he drags Krude's carcass to the corner. He climbs to the second rope and tries to pick up Krude, but FAILS TO PICK HIM UP! Instead, dorf hits a Modified Tornado DDT to keep him down. In a stupid move, dorf makes him partially stand up as he puts him though a Modified Dorf Bottom!*
*Crowd goes crazy as dorf unleashes the Cheese Sandwich! Dorf takes two bites of the sandwich and flexes his muscles to signify that he is stronger. He easily makes Krude stand up makes him stand flat behind dorf's back as he executes the DORF-PLEX! Man, look at that blubber fly! Dorf covers!!!*
Referee:
1!
2!
3!
Winner: by pinfall, DORF!
*Dorf celebrates his victory by eating another Cheese Sandwich with the crowd cheering for him....as he walks down to the aisle and into the back with cheers.*
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Post by liontamer12 on May 29, 2007 4:37:39 GMT -5
*Camera fades in on the crowd. A level of disinterest can be felt as the camera follows the crowds reactions.*
JR: Well ladies and gentlemen, we are live here on Heatvelocityimpact and we are awaiting the arrival of a match between the light heavyweight veteran, Kid Kash and the newly acquired EWT talent, John Valentine.
King: I've still gotta' say JR, Valentine's win earlier tonight against Burchill was a fluke and like I said before, I'm sticking to my guns.
JR: Well, we'll see about that, King.
*"I'm the King of my World" by Saliva sounds from the speakers and no Valentine is present. It has been 30 seconds and still Valentine cannot be seen.*
King: Where is he JR?
JR: I'm not sure King...
*Kid Kash emerges, dragging the body of an obviously bloody John Valentine. The crowd reacts with audible gasps and whispers.*
JR: Oh my god! There's no way...
*Kash finally gets Valentine to the ring and throws him in. He motions to the ref to ring the bell. In his reluctance, the ref calls for the bell.*
JR: No! The match can't start! He's in no condition to wrestle!
King: Well JR, you've got to remember, the show must go on!
JR: This is no show, King. It's a massacre!
*Kash chuckles to the dismay of the audience and brings Valentine up to his feet. He underhooks Valentine's right arm and then his left in preparation for the "Money Maker" a double underhook piledriver.*
JR: My god! Stop him already, ref!
*There are mixed reactions from the crowd, mostly of indifference or disinterest. Despite this, Kash begins to raise Valentine up for the piledriver. Kash gets Valentine up half way when he drops him as if he's too heavy. Valentine gets his bearing and back body drops Kash, reversing the "Money Maker."
King: Look JR!
JR: He reversed it!
*After this, the crowd becomes a bit more interested. A bloody Valentine gets back up to his feet as does Kash and they lock up. Kash grabs Valentine's left arm and wrenches it behind his back into a hammer lock. Valentine struggles a bit, but to no avail. Kash locks in his other arm around Valentine's neck and executes a perfect chicken wing.*
JR: Here's the infamous "Chicken Wing," King. Used by such wrestlers as Ricky "The Dragon" Ste-
King: Look JR!
*Valentine bends forward, lifting Kash from his feet and runs backward as fast as he can into the nearest turnbuckle. The impact to Kash's back releases the chicken wing and allows John some breathing time.*
JR: Good thinking from Valentine.
King: Sure, but you just wait until Kid Kash really puts the screws on!
*Kash rests on the turnbuckle face out. Valentine notices this and starts a dead run toward him. He leaps up and cross bodies Kash as hard as gravity will pull him. Kash lets out a cough and stumbles to the mat as does Valentine. The ref notices both men on the floor and begins to count...
1..
2...
3....
4.....
5......
Both Kash and Valentine return to their feet and just as Valentine goes to grab Kash, Kash delivers a hard kick right to Valentine's stomach, bending him over. He continues to punch Valentine, forcing him into the turnbuckle. Valentine becomes cornered and throws up his hands in defense. The referee, after telling Kash many times to watch the closed fists, pulls him away. Kash turns around and begins to argue with the referee.*
JR: There you go ref, bring some order to this match!
King: C'mon ref! He was doing exactly what he should have been doing!
JR: And what might that be King?
King: Do unto others bef-
JR: Before they do unto you. I know the rule dammit, I made it up!
*Valentine notices Kash's distraction and latches around Kash waist. In one fluid motion, he pulls backward and German Suplexes Kid Kash right into the turnbuckle from whence he came.*
JR: My god!
*The crowd begins to take complete interest in the match and cheers loudly for the amazing maneuver done to Kash. After slamming into the turnbuckle, Kash rolls out about 10 feet from the turnbuckle. Valentine stumbles over to the turnbuckle and begins to ascend to the top rope.*
JR: He's in no shape to be making a risk like this.
King: I hope Kid Kash rolls out of the way! C'mon Kash!
*Valentine turns around on the top rope and looks at Kash on the mat below. He raises his hand to his face as if pulling back the string of a bow and leaps from the turnbuckle. He extends his elbow and...*
JR: My god!
*Kid Kash rolls out of the way. Valentine crashes to the mat like a 747 into a mountainside. Kash crawls to Valentine and puts his arm over him for the pin. The ref begins to count...
ONE.....
TWO........
TH-
Valentine kicks out. The crowd stands on it's feet in surprise. Kash, angry, throws a tantrum and gets up. He begins to pick up Valentine in his anger. Kash gets him up about half way when Valentine punches Kash in the gut and delivers the Lion Tamer (Stone Cold Stunner).*
JR: STUNNER! STUNNER! MY GOD! SKITTLES! BARBECUE SAUCE!
King: No! Get up Kash!
Valentine crawls over to Kash's limb body and covers him for the pin. The referee counts...
ONE...
TWO......
THREE!
*The referee calls for the bell. It tolls and the crowd goes wild.*
JR: I can't believe he did it again. I told you King, this kid has some sort of fight in him! It was not a fluke!
King: I never said Valentine winning was a fluke! I just said that Kid Kash "might" be the better wrestler.
JR: Whatever you say King.
*The referee helps Valentine up and raises his arm in victory. "I'm the King of my World" by Saliva hits and the camera cuts to JR and King at the announce table.*
JR: Alright folks, that was a good match. But it doesn't stop here. The EWT Tri-State Championship will be defended tonight between Oceanic and Shawn Stasiak. Don't go away!
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