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Post by dorf on Jun 21, 2007 22:01:10 GMT -5
Finkel: This match is scheduled for one-fall and is a twenty minute time limit! *Dorf’s music, “Cancer” by Filter plays* Coming down the aisle, weighing in at 270 pounds, from Filthadelphia, Pencilvania, DORF!
*Dorf strolls down the aisle way with the Cheese sandwich raised hi and mighty to cheers and boos as he walks down the aisle with no problem. Then, near the ring steps are Davies and his Nyrdy buddies of Joel, Mike, and that Japanese sensation. The two stare at each other intently as Davies shrugs off and just sits there, while the Nyrds boo at dorf, like they’re a part of the crowd. After that little hectic situation, dorf enters the ring no problem and does his usual antics in the ring to try to get cheap pops…*
*”Apocalypse Please” by Muse plays*
Finkel: Coming down the aisle, weighing in at 287 pounds, from the Aquarium, MAELSTROM!
*He comes out surprisingly to cheers and the crowd goes wild as Davies and the Nyrds stand up to activate the crowd to cheer for Maelstrom. Maelstrom likens the cheers as he glides down the aisle as if he’s in his own natural habitat! Davies flags down Maelstrom and tells him to beat dorf down and he responds with an evil, nodding grin that nobody can be upset about. Maelstrom then rolls into the ring and the match is off!*
Bell: DING, DING, DING!
*The two immediately lock-up and switch back and forth to determine who has a greater advantage…both could not push each other over the limits. The two looked at each other intently to see if they could push one over the limit, and yet both tried again when they ran towards each other for another lock-up. This time Maelstrom gained an advantage and traps dorf to a corner with the referee right behind for the 5 count to make sure someone does something or the hold is broken. The two stare at each other again…as the crowd is getting sort of antsy or restless, but Davies has a solution by starting up a “let’s go Maelstrom!” chant.*
*After a minute or so of staring, dorf and Maelstrom lock-up again, but dorf immediately puts Maelstrom in a Side Headlock, but Maelstrom uses his strength to get to the ropes and releases the hold through the leverage of this strength and the ropes to propel dorf into a fluid, running motion to the other side of the ring and flung back with a Takedown to Maelstrom. Maelstrom gets up right away as dorf tries to punch Maelstrom down, but is countered with a Bridged Northern Lights Suplex! Referee counts!!*
Referee:
1!
2!
*Dorf kicks out!*
*Both competitors are up at the same time as Maelstrom attempts a right, but is ducked by dorf and all of a sudden, dorf hits a Bridging German Suplex for a pin! Referee counts!!*
Referee:
1!
2!
*Maelstrom kicks out!!*
*The two get up at the same amount of time and stare at each other….
and the crowd cheers vocally loud in support of this match thus far.*
*Dorf, frustrated, impatiently runs toward Maelstrom for a Clothesline, but is ducked by Maelstrom with a Drop Toe-Hold and he puts dorf into the STF right away. Dorf crawled a little bit to reach the ropes as Maelstrom held onto dorf in the STF until the referee yelled out 4! Maelstrom immediately got up quickly and went to the top turnbuckle as dorf got up slowly and Maelstrom pulls out a Double Axe Handle to dorf! Dorf goes down as Maelstrom has had enough already…makes dorf stand up to execute an Inverted Neckbreaker! Maelstrom covers!*
Referee:
1!
2!
*dorf kicks out!*
*Maelstrom signals the end as he gets up slowly and sets up the Whirlpool formation. Maelstrom attempts to lift dorf up and picks him up halfway, but dorf refuses to go up. After a third try, dorf Back Body Dropped Maelstrom. Dorf screamed to the crowd to rile it up to cheer for dorf, but the cheers are sparse, especially the section around Davies/Nyrds with boos surrounding that area. Maelstrom gets up right away and dorf takes him down with a Clothesline. Another Clothesline is hit on Maelstrom as something is fired up in dorf. Dorf makes Maelstrom stand up as Davies orders the Nyrds to enter the ring. By the time the Nyrds make it to the ring, they are Speared out of nowhere by the Cidal Squad members Andy Duke and Johnathan Doe. The evil look the duo has stared at dorf with a smirk…while Davies looks in shock.*
Davies: Guess you gotta do everything yourself these days….
*Davies then starts to balk down toward the aisle as the Cidal Squad disappears. Dorf is staring at Davies when Mike Ragnal walks down the aisle to stalk down Davies, but Davies is unaware. All of a sudden, dorf points one finger at Davies at a poor direction, Davies turns around and runs like a scalded dog from Mike Ragnal who gives chase. After a little laugh, dorf turns around to a very angry Maelstrom, who is already up…kicks dorf in the gut and gives dorf a Whirlpool that he will never forget, Maelstrom covers!*
Referee:
1!
2!
3!
Winner: by pinfall, MAELSTROM!
*After Davies got away by running around the ring and escaping into the back by going up the aisle, Ragnal stops half-way down the aisle and sees that Maelstrom won the match. As Maelstrom’s hand is raised, Ragnal is not pleased and Maelstrom looks at Ragnal flashing at his EWT World Heavyweight Championship belt like if he wants it. Ragnal signals a “no” look and scurries onto the back as Maelstrom gets cheers from the crowd as the camera fades to black for a commercial.*
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Post by respectmeordye3 on Jun 22, 2007 10:23:30 GMT -5
The National Anthem plays and Abraham Lincoln the 8th makes his way down into the ring.
A moment later wild Brazilian jazz begins to play and Pol Pot Jr. runs down the ramp and slides into the ring.
the bell sounds.
Pol runs at Abe and then leaps into the air at the last moment in an attempt to dropkick him but Abe easily avoids the move and Pol lands on his back hard.
Abe uses the open opportunity to slingshot Pol into the turnbuckles and then giving him a Gorillia Press Slam, he pulls Pol back to his feet and gives him a chop to the side of the neck, dropping Pol to the mat and giving him a chance to slide out of the ring, reach underneath it, pull out a table and then set it up and light it on fire!
Pol then slides back into the ring and leaps onto Abe's back trying to choke him out with all his might--It does no good however, as Abe puts a stop to that with a simple backdrop.
Pol rolls away and leaps to his feet and then charges at Abe again--Abe ducks and Pol ends up giving himself a piledriver right through the flaming table!
Climbing out of the ring,Abe pulls the beaten Pol to his feet yet again and tosses him back into the ring.
After re-entering the ring himself, Abe gives Pol his finisher "Ford's Theatre" before going for the pin.
1...........
2............
3!
Abraham Lincoln the 8th has won!
Suddenly Pol attacks Abe from behind, knocking him down and begins to stomp on the presidental wrestler quite mercilessly, enraged that he has been beaten by a guy dressed like Abraham Lincoln--someone Pol considers to be nothing more than a pathetic joke.
CRACK!
Pol falls to the mat beside Abraham Lincoln the 8th--out cold from the sneak attack from behind thanks to Singapore Caine and his weapon.
Singapore helps his tag team partner to his feet and then out of the ring and to the back.
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Post by raftshack on Jun 22, 2007 12:10:18 GMT -5
As we return from commercial, we see Kevin Nash and Scott Hall waiting in the ring, donning their Outsider attire, as the Toomitron suddenly lights up and a very funky tune starts up, as a... beachball lowers from under the Toomitron from a wire or something and starts spinning as "Mr. Mischief and Mr. Shenanigans" step on out, grooving to the beat, both donning some kind of colorblind man designed disco suit and wearing those shoes with fish swimming in them, as out from the back emerges Poofy Short, wearing a gray pimp suit, as all three of them start doing some kind of horrible dance to the funkidelic beat, as the Outsiders kind of stare. Mischief starts shaking his fat suited ass around look a maniac, as Faboon does some kind of "Boot Scoot Boogy" variation, while Mr. Short simply bobs in place, doing some classic Jazz Hands. They start heading down to the ring as this beat plays. Announcer: Erm... the following tag team contest is scheduled for one fall! Introducing first, from the Juicy Juice Factory, weighing in at much more than me, Mr. Mischief and Mr. Shenanigans, the Men of the House! The two grin, as they continue their rather insane antics, while the charisma vacuum that is Poofy just kind of follows along, with a blank expression. Suddenly the music is abruptly cut off, as Poofy gasps, clutching his junk and falling flat on his face onto the steel ramp. It's Curly Long, with a very pissed off look on his face. Mischief and Shenanigans quickly reach down, Mischief looking on with an insane sneer giving Curly a BRAIN CHOP... which misses him by about a mile. He looks even more angrily back up, as suddenly Big and Bad run out from the back, knocking the impostors to the ground, stomping viciously at them both! Mr Big then pulls Shenanigans/Faboon up, hoisting him high with a Gorilla Press, then walking up the rampway and chucking him off into a table below, as Mischief looks on in anger, charging and bouncing right off Big, who quickly grabs him in a full nelson, as Bad reaches into his pocket, pulling out a butcher knife and stabbing him right in the fat suit, as Mischief looks on in horror, Bad shoving his face in and ripping out mouthfuls of cotton, as Big continues to hold him still. Bad keeps this up until the suit is nearly empty, before Big rips it off, revealing a barely clothed Zeleke in his boxers, as both men grab him by the throat, Long giving orders, as the two walk back to where they threw Faboon, CHOKESLAMMING ZELEKE ATOP OF HIM! The two collide and roll around atop each other, as Poofy Short struggles to his feet, Bad headbutting him viciously in the face, then both Big and Bad grabbing and flinging him off to the same side of the rampway, Poofy crashing into his employers as well, all three of them looking quite helpless as Bad looks down, getting a crazy look in his eyes, walking over to the edge of the rampway, then leaping off... delivering the Earthquake Splash atop all three, doing further damage, as Long looks down at the rampway, now a very pleased sneer on his face. Long: Hey you loons... next time you rip off my boys here, WE'LL RIP YOU UP!!! Long laughs rather maniacally as Big simply folds his arms, remaining quite menacing, as Bad waddles away from the wreckage, a very twisted sneer on his horrid looking face, as all three of them quickly make their exit to the backstage, leaving three victims in their wake. The camera cuts back to the ring announcer. Announcer: Ladies and Gentlemen... this match has been declared a no contest! The crowd boos Big, Bad, and Long quite angrily as it shows the heap that is Raftshack and that other guy as we cut to commercial.
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Post by xombiehiphop on Jun 22, 2007 13:29:05 GMT -5
Announcer: The following handicap match is scheduled for one fall..introducing first..hailing from The Dead Moon Circus..accompanied to the ring by Mr.Bunny..Madison The Clown Girl!
"Tablescraps" by Stolen Babies starts to play as the rather odd pair of Madison The Clown Girl and her bodyguard Mr.Bunny make their way towards the ring. Madison shoots off in a sprint and slides into the ring, performing a goofy little twirl before striking a pose. Mr.Bunny props himself in a corner..
Announcer: ..And her partner..from Rotterdam, Netherlands...weighing in at 303 pounds..he is the EWT Toolshed Champion..Voltigeur!
Voltigeur appears before the masses with his title slung over his shoulder, drawing some cheers, Shastakovich's "Symphony #5: Finale" sounding his arrival. After a majestic bow he enters the ring where Madison and Mr.Bunny are clapping for him. Voltigeur gives the pair a weary look and Madison flashes him a thumbs up..
Announcer: ..And their opponents..
Suppose you were to die tonight..what would you say?
"We Die Young" by Alice In Chains begins to play as the entire Draugr can be seen amongst the fog upon the stage
Announcer: ..Ghost Face, Karma, Corpse and Wraith..they are..The Draugr!
Each member of the horror themed faction take a methodical stroll to ring side amongst the darkness of their entrance. All four slowly climb onto the apron before creeping into the ring. They stare at their opponents with vile intentions running through their minds as the bell sounds..
Madison begins to perform some stretches, warming up but Voltigeur wags a finger at her in a chivalrous manner, indicating that he wants to start. Madison begins to protest but Corpse rushes the Toolshed champion from behind, stunning him with some clubbing blows. Voltigeur begins to remove his pre-match coat as Corpse backs him into a corner with punches. Corpse attempts to whip him out but the much larger Voltigeur reverses, sending Corpse hard into the corner. As he stumbles out, the modern day knight drops him a stiff, European Uppercut. He grabs Corpse by his blue hair when he realizes some type of dark blue colored liquid is spilling out his mouth, soon covering his hands.
Voltigeur takes a few step backwards, looking over his hands, allowing Corpse to rise to his feet. Voltigeur quickly Clotheslines him to the mat, but he does so, more of the thick liquid sprays from Corpse's mouth, landing on Voltigeur's chest and some even lands on the Ref. The ref turns his back to try and wipe it off and Voltigeur isn't sure what to make of it. As he is distracted, Wraith slips into the ring drops the champ with a Neckbreaker, leaving as quickly as he entered.
Corpse gets back to his feet before stomping Voltigeur in the stomach, waiting until he gets to his hands and knee's before bringing both feet crashing into his opponents face. Corpse tags in Ghost Face who catches Volt with a Knee Lift as he tries to get back up.
..Meanwhile, Madison stands on the middle rope in her corner, bouncing up and down, eagerly awaiting her chance to get in the ring.
Ghost Face whips Voltigeur into a corner and charges in with a Clothesline. He attempts to pull Volt out with a Running Bulldog, but as he leaps, Voltigeur shoves him forward so he lands on his back. Ghost Face winces but goes back on the attack, but Voltigeur is ready and crushes him with a Windmill Slam (Tilt-A-Whirl Backbreaker). Clutching his back, Ghost Face pulls himself up to a sitting position. Voltigeur runs towards his foe, only for Ghost Face to catch him with a Drop Toe Hold, straddling his throat across the bottom rope. Ghost Face uses the ropes to spring board up and over, dropping a leg across the back of Voltigeur's neck. He then tags Wraith into the match..
Wraith instantly begins to claw and tear away at Volt's face, screaming "Get up! GET UP!" before stomping away at him. He hauls Voltigeur up and hits him with a Russian Leg Sweep. He whips Voltigeur into the ropes but Volt snags them with his arms, Wraith dropping his head in the middle of the ring. Before Volt can capitalize, Ghost Face and Corpse grabs his arms. Voltigeur nails them with a pair of right hands, dropping them from the apron. However, he turns right around into a Sweeping STO from the green haired Draugr member. Wraith cracks his neck to the side and tags Karma into the match..
Back in the opposite corner, Madison is clapping her arms above her head, getting the crowd behind Voltigeur as she starts to chant his name. ..Quickly realizing his name isn't very easy to chant..she simply turns it to "Volt! Volt!" The audience starting to will him on.
Back to the action, Voltigeur uses the ropes to pull himself into a corner where he receives a pair of stiff chops, the sound bouncing off his flesh. He suddenly snatches Karma by the head and pulls back a fist...until he realizes just who it is, as he must have been dazed. He drops his fist, uncertain what to do, as attacking a women seems to be against his nature. Karma gives him a hateful scowl and throws a punch. Volt catches her fist and sets her on the top rope, shaking his head at her. Karma catches him by surprise by wildly leaping off and hitting him with a Diving Clothesline. She starts to tear and claw at his face before she backs up, smashing a knee into the side of his face. Karma tags Ghost Face back into the match.
Ghost Face enters the ring via a Mushroom Stomp, forcing Voltigeur to smack face first into the mat. None of them seem to want to go for a pin, wanting to hurt him as had been instructed by Oceanic. A low drop kick drops Voltigeur before he can get back to his knee's fully. Ghost Face smirks down at his fallen adversary, helping him up, only to set him up for the "Ghost Buster" Evenflow DDT. However, Voltigeur is able to counter..lifting Ghost Face upwards before driving the air out of him with a high angle Spinebuster. Voltigeur stumbles to his feet as Corpse suddenly flies through the air..but Voltigeur is able to catch him and hoist him up high..then squashes him with a Black Hole Slam, The Shock and Awe.
With two of his four opponents down, Voltigeur starts to crawl to his corner for a tag, only to have his ankle snagged by Wraith. Voltigeur rolls onto his back, booting Wraith in the stomach, sending him sailing into Karma. Voltigeur goes back to crawling..
..The crowd reaches a fevered pitch as Voltigeur reaches his hand for Madison, looking to tag her into the match for the first time. He reaches and reaches..fingers nearly touching..
..But then Madison drops from the apron. Voltigeur looks completely stunned as the crowd begins to boo. Madison gives him a dark little grin before tugging down one of her eye lids, sticking out her tongue at him. It is then that Voltigeur realizes how dire his situation is. He slowly rises to his feet, spotting all four Draugr members behind him. He spins around, throwing wild punches, holding his own for a few moments before his overpowered and forced onto his knee's. Wraith pulls him into a Flatliner position, hitting it, at the same time Corpse hits an Enzugri. It effectively busts him open and each of the zombie's relish the sight before Ghost Face hooks a leg..
..One..
..Two..
..Three..
Announcer: ..Here are your winners..The Draugr!
Madison and Mr.Bunny join The Draugr in the ring as they all exchange nods. The crowd boo's this before each of them begins to lay the mother of all stomping onto Voltigeur's..that's six pair of feet kicking him for those counting.
..Suddenly, a figure can be seen rushing down the aisle. Madison hurriedly slides out of the ring. ..The rest turn to face..Crauswell! The 6'4'' furry and former Ox Division/Toolshed Champion wastes no time coming to Voltigeur's aid, nailing Wraith with a Beak Buster(Chokeslam Into a Powerbomb). Mr. Bunny (who isn't a furry so Crauswell has no qualms with attacking him) is the next to try his hand but he is dropped by a Yakuza Kick. Ghost Face grabs Karma by the waist and pulls her out of the ring, despite her wild struggling. Corpse looks poised to attack the griffon but turns around just in time to be caught by a Amsterdam Slam from Voltigeur.
The Draugr, Madison and Mr.Bunny all back up the the aisle as Crauswell help the bloody Voltigeur to stable himself. They stare each other down before the zombies, the clown and the bunny disappear behind the curtain..
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Post by The Bad Man on Jun 22, 2007 20:47:24 GMT -5
* “Young, Dumb, & Ugly” by Weird Al begins to play over the speakers. *
*Jobby explodes from out of the locker room, pumping his fist repeatedly in the air to the music as the audience cheers him on. They cheer more as he runs from the right to the left side of the stage. At the 0:26 mark, he runs back in the middle of the ramp and at the 0:36 Axel explodes from out of the EWT curtain. Jobby holds his hand out, while Axel tries hard not think hard about the fact they will be facing two men that weight each weigh the same as him.*
Finkel: From Jobstown, NJ & Modesto, CA respectively... Weighting in at 498... "The Wrestle Posse"! Tenacious J!
*Axel leans in like Jobby, grabs his hand, and points at Jobby.*
Finkel: And A!
*Jobby grins widely before giving a pair of thumbs up. Jobby begins to walk down the ramp, while Axel is halted at the top of the ramp. Jobby runs around the center of the ramp in a circle. As he runs from side to side to high five fans, Axel walks fast to catch up. Axel gives a slow spin as he catches up with Jobby before climbing the steps. He walks through the ropes and climbs the nearest turnbuckle, giving little cheers as the crowd loves Jobby's hyper version of the Pogo. Axel waves off the crowd, getting a decent amount of crowd members doing it back to him. He steps down just as Jobby rolls into the ring then proceeds to disrobe from his jacket. Jobby energetically points at Axel with both hands as Axel slowly reaches up for his shades. Axel pulls them off to a bit of fanfare then hands them off. The Icon looks at the Toomitron, unnerved as Jobby almost obviously eggs on the crowd.*
Finkel: There opponents ...
*The terrible dinge of loud organ music can be heard as out from the back walk Big and Bad. Behind them Curly Long follows and shouts abuse at the fans but his duo have eyes solely on The Wrestle Posse.*
Finkel: Hailing from Bad Axe, Michigan and wieghing in at a colossal 830lbs .... Big & Bad!
*The crowd boos as Mr. Big makes his way up the steps and into the ring, Mr. Bad follows his bulbous mass a grotesque sight that puts the front row fans off there beer. Curly Long stays down on the ground outside shouting at his team to crush the posse while checking out the ladies. In the WP corner Axel looks across to the other side where Mr. Bad leers at both of them like some sort of hippo seeing a large buffet table.*
Axel: *not taking his eyes off Bad* It's bad vs bad, Jay. I got this.
JBL: Not a smart move by Axel, if you ask me...
Cole: Why's that, John?
JBL: Because Axel is the smallest person in this match!
Cole: But he maybe the fastest person in the match too. And I think he's certainly faster than Bad.
*Jobby nods and takes his place on the outside. Bad shuffles over as Axel walks slowly out to meet him. The referee starts the bell and the match is underway. They lock up with Axel surprisingly gaining the upper head, possibly due to his height advantage. But that quickly changes as Bad smiles a sinister grin then slams his head straight into the forehead of Halaway. Axel losses his ground and the leverage turns Bad's way. Only to be broken by Bad himself to deliver a punch straight into Axel's Adam's apple. The self proclaimed icon grips as his throat as Bad cackles a raspy laugh. Seeing that the punch maybe just a tad against the rules, the referee admonishes the Bad one. He falls deadly ill as Bad flashes a sickening grin at him but that little threatening costs Bad his advantage. Halaway takes a page out of his ex-girl friend's book with a chop to the throat. Bad gurgles from the blow as Axel flashes a sneer of his own.*
Cole: Look at them trying to out bad each other!
JBL: That's a foolish idea for Axel, as Mr. Bad is the baddest man on the planet.
Cole: That's why they call him Mr. Bad, eh John?
JBL: Congrats, Cole, you learned something.
*Axel runs back towards the ropes and slams his arm into the chest of Bad, to no effect. He glances to the crowd before running to again to another side to deliver a Clothesline. Yet the it is all for naught due to a vicious strike to the throat by Bad. The clash of momentum sends Axel to the mat with a thud. Bad looks down at his prey with “Bad” thoughts in mind. He power walks to the ropes and makes it back to so a Body Splash to Axel. But Halaway has already recovered in time and rolls out of the way before Bad could attempt such a career ending move. The cruiser weight by circumstance in this match quickly pulls himself back up to the feet. But he has unfortunately placed himself in a corner. Bad rushes forth to compress Halaway.*
Cole: OH MY!
OOOOH!
JBL: That's gotta hurt.
*The ropes and steel of the turnbuckle rattles from the sheer impact. The huge mountain of blubber and grease backs up, he looks at his work with a murderous glee. Halaway crashes down to the mat as he tries to fill his lungs back to from their sunken state. Bad reaches down with his grimy hands to pull Axel by his spiked hair over to his corner. Two giants' hands meet to relieve Mr. Bad in order to bring out possibly the largest man in EWT. Big steps over the ropes as Bad pulls up Axel to hold him for some punishment. Halaway struggles to free himself but all effort ends as Big slams a few fists into already damaged face of Axel. Finally, the referee drives Bad out of the ring freeing Axel from anymore double teaming. But not from being violently thrown by Bad into the boot of Big. Again, the youngest Halaway crumbles to the ground.*
Cole: Big boot, right to the skull!
JBL: This is what I was afraid of. Axel may have a great future, but not even he could take on the brunt of Big and Bad.
*The sharp dressed giant bends his huge frame to grab Axel by his neck, both hands making Axel's above sized neck disappear. From a laying position, Axel is lifted to his feet. It's clear to everyone that it is only Big's strength that his keeping Axel up at the moment. Halaway is lifted further in the air by his neck. He is swayed back and forth as he gasps for air. A five count starts against Big but it is halted before it can reach 3. Halted by Big throwing the body of Axel across the ring as if he was a rag doll. The crumbled form of the Icon lands a few feet from his corner. Be it crowd cheering, the encouragement of his tag partner, or the want to save himself from more punishment, Axel rouses from blow and crawls desperately to Jobby. Big, realizing his mistake, attempts to stops Axel from tagging out. And he is successful by pulling Axel by one foot back to the middle of the ring. But that does not curtail Jobby from trying to cheer on Axel. Big lifts Axel back up and whips him to the ropes but Axel collapses to the mat. Jobby tries to rush in the ring to help Axel from further damage but is stopped by the now competent referee. The crowd boos as they expect Big to cheat with the referee's attention focused on Jobby. Axel looks over at his loyal and naïve partner with a strange smile. The crowd looks at this, puzzled, while Big reaches down to presumingly due more damage. Only he is halted with a wincing, very “low” kick by Axel that sends the giant to his knees.*
JBL: Great midsection kick! That's why Axel has such a great future... Big maybe the largest man in EWT, but even large men have a weak spot.
Cole: That was possibly the lowest “midsection” kick I've ever seen, John.
JBL: Call it whatever you want, the referee didn't see it.
*With a fresh opening, Axel crawls with all his might over Jobby. The referee and Jobby, not seeing the highly illegal action by Axel, are shocked to see the effects of it. With a finally jump, Axel tags in Jobby as Big painfully tries to stand all the while sending daggers at Axel. Jobby runs over the middle of the apron, seeing a spot for perhaps his move known as Reaganomics. The crowd, ready for another historic Jobby “move”, jump to their feet as Jobby pull himself to the top rope. To everyone's shock, Jobby hits a Corkscrew Body Splash on kneeling Big. The crowd pops huge for it.*
Cole: OH MY!
JBL: WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT?!
Cole: What do you mean?
JBL: Jobby actually hit a move!
*Jobby, seeing Big down, he runs to the ropes and comes back for a successful Nitro Special. The crowd is going crazy with cheers as Jobby plays to them instead of covering Big. Finally he does so but is lifted in the air by Big's pure strength. Big angrily pulls himself back to a standing base as Jobby stumbles back to his feet. McJobberston rushes forth to caught Big off guard but trips before he reaches Big, falling face first in front of Big. Much to the delight and dismay of the crowd. Big uses this as an opening to set up Jobby for a Powerbomb.*
Cole: No way! Don't tell me that Big is going to lift up Jobby for a Powerbomb!
JBL: I think that's just what he's doing. I think I would actually like to see it!
Cole: Oh come on!
*Big lifts up Jobby high in the air, who looks highly uncomfortable in what is a first for him. Despite much struggling, Big slams Jobby from about 8 feet in the air to the mat below. The ring shakes violently as Jobby involuntarily bounces off the mat. Big looks down at Jobby as he goes for a cover.*
JBL: This is it. It's over.
Cole: I DON'T THINK JOBBY HAS EVER BEEN POWERBOMBED LIKE THAT!
1!
2!
3 NO! Axel breaks up the count!
Cole: DID BIG WIN?
JBL: Of course not, otherwise the bell would have rung you idiot!
*Bad comes in to even the odds... Or to add another 400 plus pounds into the ring. A slightly refreshed Axel stomps away at Big as Bad rushes forth only to be met with low Dropkick that sends th big man down. Axel runs to the ropes and hits a Running DDT on the kneeling Big. Axel helps up Jobby as Bad returns to his feet. Axel points at Bad while facing Jobby, who understands immediately what it means. They both take a side of the backward facing Bad.*
Cole: Don't tell me they are going to lift Bad!
JBL: No way! That's a hernia waiting to happen!
*The two Wrestle Posse members actually lift Bad, to much crowd popping. They lift more, fully expecting to go for Back Suplex, but before the amazing feat can happen Mr. Big Clotheslines harshly the back of Axel's head. Halaway falls face first to the ground as Bad falls right on Jobby, perhaps crushing a rib or five.*
JBL: What did I tell you!
Cole: I THINK JOBBY'S BEEN FLATTEN BY BAD!
JBL: I don't think that, I know.
*Bad slowly gets up from the flattened Jobby and grins, dribble forming on his chin. Mr. Big throws Axel to the outside who gets kicked in the gut by Curly Long unseen by the referee. As Mr. Bad retunrs to the outside apron Mr. Big takes Jobby up by the throat who is still trying to get his chest cavity to expand after having 400 pounds crush it. Mr. Big lifts into the chokeslam manouver and holds it there about to hit the HFD.*
Cole: What is this?
JBL: Perhaps your dates have arrived?
*From out of the crowd several large men have arrived in pairs. They are dressed just like Big and Bad and although not quite there size are very close in shape (I.e one's fat and the other is taller). Mr. Big thows Jobby to the canvas as he looks at these men. Suddenly one of the pairs grab Mr. Bad off the apron and drags him to the outside. The pair begin to pound away on Bad, but he is fighting back with shots of his own. Mr. Big leaves Jobby behind and exits the ring to aid his partner but is also attacked by the another pair who have come out of the crowd. As they brawl with these four men the referee starts up a ten count.*
1 ... 2 ... 3 ... 4 ... 5...
JBL: Who are these people and why are they ruining this match?
*Curly Long joins the fray by lowblowing one guy and then jumping on the back of a rather chubby white guy and applying his Curly Clutch. Mr. Bad has managed to slam one of his assailents into the ring post but the other one is still throwing punches. Meanwhile Mr. Big has easily dispatched his attackers with two harsh clotheslines and heads back to the ring to finish Jobby off, he grabs a rope when another couple of men who look vaugely like Big and Bad grab his feet from under the ring .*
... 6 ... 7...
Cole: They certainly are persistent John
*Mr. Big can't get in the ring and has to grab the guys and yank them from there hiding place. Mr. Big smashes one in the face with a headbutt. Meanwhile even more men come from under the ring and keep attacking Big and Bad, Axel and Jobby who are both in the ring can only look at this chaos in shock.*
JBL: Oh come on, how many of these guys could there be?
... 8 ... 9 ...
*AS if to answer JBL's question another pair appear from under the ring steps and use it to ram Mr. Big with who was about to get back inside the ring but instead crashes into the barricade. At least 12 men are now attacking Big and Bad.*
... 10!
*The bell rings*
FINKEL: The winners of this match by count out ... The Wrestle Posse
*Axel has his hands raised as Jobby stumbles up to his feet slowly. Meanwhile on the outside the Big and Bad mob brawl continues. Suddenly from the top of the rampway walking backwards are Faboon and Zeleke in there normal (Ok recognisable) ring gear. The pair stop there walk and turn aaround at the same time and both burst out laughing at Big and Bad's predicament.
Cole: Ah it was those two fun loving crazy guys Raftshack
JBL: More like the funny farm to me Cole.
*Curly Long is still trying to choke out one of the imposters while Big and Bad are now being overwhelmed through sheer weight of numbers. Raftshack continue to watch and giggle amongst themselves at the top of the ramp. Meanwhile Axel pulls Jobby out of the ring avoiding the ruckus. Jobby's out on his feet as Axel almost carries him up the ramp. Raftshack pause there giggling as the winning team approach. Raftshack for no reason drop to there bellys and do the worm past the Wrestleposse and then pop up further down the ramp and then continue to point and laugh at Big and Bad.*
JBL: How dare these two mock Big and Bad!
Cole: I don't think they look too scary now John, I mean look at them.
JBL: Cole it took twelve men to stop Big and Bad, Twelve!
Cole: Well they certainly got Big and Bad's attention tonight. While for the Wrestle Posse this is a valuble win!
*Axel shakes his head in utter confusion at the antics of Raftshack. But before they can exit to the locker room, Karma crawls out. Her inhuman eyes locked on the face of her once dear “Axy”. Axel can do nothing but stare back, with a look that could speak volumes of what is running through his mind*
(fade out to commercials)
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Post by invaderdave on Jun 22, 2007 22:49:48 GMT -5
"The Stroke" by Billy Squier begins to play, and a Guy Who Looks A Lot Like Billy Squier But It’s Not Him makes his way to the ring to the delight of almost no one. The Squier lookalike dances Billy's runway walk in tune with the music down to the ring, and it turns into a stumble when Dave Davies jumps out of the crowd, hopping the rail and clocking him over the head with a chair, which actually manages to pop the crowd.
Dave grabs Billy by the hair, and drags him down to the ring, rolling him inside. Dave immediately sets the chair down, picks the Squier wannabe up, and piledrives him directly onto the chair. Deciding this isn't enough, Dave sets the chair in its seated position, and stands up on the seat, pulling the guy that looks like Billy Squier up with him. Setting him up once more, Dave drops downward, piledriving the Squier not quite but he does look an awful lot like him for sure right on the seat of the chair.
Dave sits down on the chair, smiling, hovering over the Squier type guy slightly, before standing back up and rolling him to the outside. Climbing out after him, the Squier type guy jumps up, kneeing Davies in the head, sending him back into the ring. Meanwhile, Squier but not really bends down, reaching under the ring for some sort of weapon of miniscule desctruction. Calling on his high spot past, Dave recovers, runs, and dives through the ropes tope style, catching Squieresque on the way through, rolling him into a sunset flip. The ref dives into the frey, making a count, only making it to two when Dave gets up, devious thoughts on his mind.
Davies pulls ain't Squier up once again, pulling him to the announcer's table. Setting Squier up onto the table, he delivers a few shots, making sure Squier stays put. Dave then climbs up to the apron, and up to the nearest turnbuckle, climbing up to the second rope, before taking flight...sending Squier right through that table. Stepping around the wreckage, the ref looks down; Dave was laying on top of almost Squier, the wind knocked out of him. One, two, three, and the match was over.
Dave managed to stumble to his feet, looking down at the carnage he'd caused, a warm, satisfied smile on his face...which turned to anger. He looked at the ring announcer, pushing him over and taking the house mic.
"That was my comeback match, folks...working with some lame ass that thinks he's some gay rock star from the early 80's...but that's not what I'm mad about, ladies and gentlemen of the audience. I'm angry because I have yet to have on my plate what I truly want. I'm angry because the dish I want to be served is surrounding himself with garnish to protect himself...Dorf, you lame p***sy, you have to have some pretty shrunken testicles to hide behind a group like the Cidal Squad. If you were any kind of man, you'd face me right now...but I know thats not going to happen. So here's what I propose...I know some chick won some match, and now she thinks she's boss of me. Well you know what? She can boss me around all she wants to, just as long as she does something right for a change and puts Dorf in a match with me at the next big show...and I want Dorf in a Streetfight, Oceanic. You put me in a streetfight with Dorf, and I'll do whatever it is you ask of me. And Cidal Squad....if you think you scare me, then you're dead, dead wrong. I was rolling in barbed wire long before Mike Ragnal broke his first table, you understand? Anything you think you can do to me, I will throw back at you, about a hundred times worse. If you think you can provide any shelter for Dorf, let me tell you one thing; you don't realize just how much I hate that man...and just what I'm willing to do to tear his lungs out..."
Dave threw down the mic, satisfied with his challenge, as he made his way to the back.
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Post by teamireland on Jun 23, 2007 11:57:32 GMT -5
*"I'm Shipping Up to Boston" begins playing over the EWT PA system as Coach O'Hare, Aidan Donnelly, Shane Malone & Sean McCann enter. O'Hare is carrying his Hurley as usual, but he is not waving it triumphantly as he had hoped he would.*Toni "The Garc" Garcya: Ladies & Gentlemen, please welcome Coach O'Hare, Aidan Donnelly, "The Celtic Giant" Shane Malone & Sean McCann... TEAM IRELAND! *O'Hare has a face like thunder on him, Shane & Aidan also look angry, Sean simply hangs his head down, not willing to look at the others. The Irish Quartet enter the ring, there is no sign of their usual pyro at the entrance ramp. In the ring, O'Hare takes a mic from "The Garc".*O'Hare: Cut the damn music! I know it may seem a little late, but this has been a long time coming! Y'know, I didn't want to have to do this, really. In all fairness, I tried to warn the lad & all... but he messed up for us yet again! *Sean interjects, he grabs the mic from O'Hare's hands.*Sean: Coach, look, Liam made a mistake, but he only had the interests of the team at heart, really. So he may have eliminated Shane, but he still wanted to win the TLC Rumble for US! For Ireland! For Team Ireland! O'Hare: Sean, I know you're his mate & all, but I've given Liam MORE than enough chances to prove himself! You've risked your own reputation on saving him & allowing him a place in this team. But now he disobeyed a direct order! If he'd just followed procedure, the four of you could have gone on to win the TLC Rumble & we'd be running the show right now! He's even responsible for eliminating YOU! Sean: In fairness, now, that was an accident. It was Ratings that threw Liam... Coach: And you're telling me Liam couldn't have stopped himself from colliding into you? Not only did he not stop, he actually managed to turn his run towards you into an attack! He didn't simply collide with you, he actually clotheslined you over the top! Maybe you failed to realize that in the heat of the moment, but it happened. Sean: But... but he got down to the last few in the Rumble. That must count for something! O'Hare: The last few? The four of you could well have gone on to win the entire thing if he'd followed the plan! We could have had control over EWT for an entire month if he'd co-operated with you three & worked as a team. We had FOUR opportunities to be in charge! Even though my original choice of Aidan was eliminated early on, if Liam had worked as part of a team with you & big Shane, you three could still have gone on to victory! Instead, Liam went for personal glory, got eliminated by Oceanic & cost us the match! Sean: He wanted to prove his worth! He thought that if he could manage to win the Rumble for us, then he'd have ultimate security in Team Ireland & EWT! O'Hare: Look, enough of this nonsense of making excuses! Liam, get your arse out here right now, son! *"Sweden" by The Divine Comedy begins playing, as Liam nervously walks out from the back & down to the ring. The fans display some sympathy for Liam as they begin cheering for him. Liam continues to walk on down the ramp, not even acknowledging the fans, so scared is he of what may come next. He steps gingerly into the ring & comes face-to-face with Coach O'Hare. Before "Sweden" has even stopped playing O'Hare delivers a harsh slap to Liam's face. Liam staggers back as the audience "Oooooooooh"'s.*O'Hare: How did I EVER consider you worthy of membership on this team? You're a joke! You got your arse handed to you by a Frenchman, a bleedin' FROG, for two consecutive months! You start acting like Hulk Hogan after a few whacks to the head! You've lost nearly every major match you've been in & NOW you were eliminated from the TLC Rumble by a WOMAN! You're an embarassment! Liam: (nearly sobbing) I... I... I just wanted to win it for... O'Hare: Aye, aye! We've been through all this rigmarole already. I have a feeling that if you DID win, we wouldn't have seen hide nor hair of that briefcase. You're just the type of fella who'd keep that all to himself. So spare me this fairy-tale about "acting for the good of the team". You haven't acted like part of this team in months! You haven't even been using the same music as the other lads when coming out for your matches! Liam, I wanted to help you. Sean & Aidan vouched for you, so I let you stay on the team. I gave you that one last opportunity to prove yourself. I even kept you out of the BUTT in case you dropped a match & caused me to get even more pissed off. But this is just about the final straw, mate! From now on, Team Ireland are getting serious! No more joking! No more choking! And the first step in getting serious is ridding ourselves of the biggest joke in our ranks... *O'Hare is cut off by the sounds of a roaring engine. All eyes dart to the Toomitron (Oceanitron?) where it shows a blue Dodge Viper starting up and begins peeling out as it drives away. Down the vacant streets of the usually busy city, the car turns sharply at high speeds, not doubt the driver possesses impressive skills. As the vehicle handbreaks—its tires screeching as it leads tracks on the pavement—it comes to a sudden stop in front of the EWT Arena. The driver of the Viper revs the engine up again and it makes it’s move to the Arena. Suddenly out of no where, a golden limousine plows into the scene and smashes against the Viper at high speeds, T-bone style. The force of the collision causes the Viper to the roll several times before it slams into a ice cream cart, causing a large explosion. The gold limousine however, surprisingly remains unscratched and heads towards the EWT Arena. Moments later inside the arena, the limousine crashes through the wall and setting off more explosions. As the members of Team Ireland watch on with their mouths gapped—much like the audience—music of Indian film origin begins to play. The passenger doors open and group of beautiful female dancers of Indian descent and dressed in traditional (yet still quite revealing) garb rush out onto the entrance stage. They begin to dance to the rhythm of the music (similar to the choreography in the video) as the one dancer in the middle moves forward and rips off her choli dress as it were a pair of tear away pants. She reveals a much more revealing outfit underneath in the form of booty shorts and bikini top with Indian-esque symbols printed on them. After performing a dance that one would usually see at the local “Foxy Boxy Club”, the lead dancer and the other dancers point to the golden limo where after a small explosion, a man pops out from the sunroof and onto the roof of the automobile (like Rey Mysterio). The man is of average height and Indian descent (not like Rey Mysterio) and it isn’t long until the announce team realize who this familiar face is.*”The Intellect” Nick Russ: Hey! That’s Mahavir Abha!!! Mahavir Abha has finally made it to EWT! Jerome “The Lord” East: About damn time, too. I thought this guy was never going to debut. *With a million dollar (rupee?) smile, Mahavir steps off the limo and heads to the end of stage’s rampway, where the head dancer and girlfriend of Mahavir, the lovely and possibly slutty Jasmyne meets her. After receiving a kiss on the cheek from his woman, Mahavir struts down the aisle with Jasmyne arm-and-arm. As they approach the ring, the members of Team Ireland stand on their guard, unsure of the Bollywood Big Shot’s intentions. With the exception of Coach O’Hare, who is quite livid about the sudden interruption. After entering the ring and the music comes to a stop, Mahavir reveals to the audience his own personal microphone and begins to address the crowd.*Mahavir: EWT, ha-ha, Mahavir has arrived! *The crowd whoops & cheers.*Mahavir: And always I am with the sexiest woman of all of Mumbai—and yes folks, she is as easy as she looks, ha-ha! The lovely Jasmyne! *The cameraman zooms in on Jasmyne who in returns blows a kiss to the camera and winks. Mahavir pops his head into frame and smiles at the camera.*Mahavir: Like what you see, yes? *The crowd pops for his unofficial catchphrase as Mahavir gets back on track speaking to the fans.*Mahavir: Now, for those who don’t know me, allow me to give you a little background, soon to be seen on A&E’s Biography, yes? Yes? Yes? Yes, that’s right. I am big star in my homeland of India. I am the brightest star of all of Mumbai and has helped put Bollywood on the map, ha-ha. I have starred in 50 films where I act, sign and do all of my own stunts. Jasmyne here is also a successful actress in Bollywood, starring in over 100 films—the NAUGHTY kind. You all know what I’m talking about, yes? The ones with the *begins to make pornography music sounds*. The ones where they have the sex with each other. Very fun stuff, she likes too. She stars in both kinds—the ones where she plays the woman with the leaking faucet and plumber, and the ones where she is the female prison for a sexy party! Those are my favorites! Ahh, I digress. Anyway, together we conquered Bollywood and the world of film, and now we here in America to take the wrestling world by storm, ha-ha! But most of all, we came here to have the fun and the sexy time, ha-ha!!! *Another crowd pop before Mahavir turns to Team Ireland.* Mahavir: Now, What is this talk I hear from you... (he points to O'Hare) about "getting serious"? Do you not like to have fun? Do you not like to dance? *Before Mahavir can cause one of his famous spontaneous Bollywood dance numbers to break out, O'Hare cuts him off.*O'Hare: Who the f*** are you & what the f*** are you doing here? Mahavir: I am Maha… *O’Hare interrupts him before he could introduce himself… again.*O’Hare: SHUT UP! JUST SHUT YER YAP!!! THIS is a Team Ireland matter! We only need our own people here. We're just about to show all these idiots why we're the top stable in EWT... no, no, no... in WRESTLING today! How we know when to cut the weakness out of our team & seperate the wheat from the chaff! Now, if you don't mind, kindly get out to f***! Right? Mahavir: Hey, hey, it’s okay. Calm down, my moustache friend. Speaking of which, that moustache it’s pretty—how do you say it? Badass? Yes, yes. It is a badass moustache. You remind me of Tommy Selleck. P.I. Magnum, yes? Good actor, he is. Very good. And in a way, your hair reminds me of a young Richard Gere. *Surprised by the compliment, a flattered O’Hare smiles while he runs his hand through his short hair in a sly manner.*Mahavir: Tell me, do you also like to “play” with gerbils? *O’Hare’s smile turns into a frown as he stares daggers at Mahavir.*Mahavir: I’m not going to look down on you if you do. I mean, it’s your body and gerbil and if you want to have fun with it, ha-ha, by all means go ahead. O’Hare: Listen to me lad, you’ve made one hell of a bad first impression on me. Either your all balls or no brains, you got nerve talkin’ to me like that. Now I suggest you get the hell out of here if ye know what’s good for you. When Team Ireland is around, things get ugly real quick. Mahavir: (hands up defensively) Okay, okay. I am sorry for my accusations that you love to stuff gerbils up yourself. That is what you want to hear, yes? I have a peace offering for you in the form of the hottest piece of ass in India, ha-ha. Have you met Jasmyne? She is very sexy, yes?” *O’Hare anger simmers as he eyes up Jasmyne’s goods in approval, scratching his chin while doing so.*Mahavir: Yes, you like what you see. Jasmyne, why don’t you say hello to a Coach Ireland? *Jasmyne leans into Mahavir’s microphone looking at O’Hare and the members of Team Ireland with sultry smile.*Jasmyne: Hello, Coach Ireland. Mahavir: Ha-ha! How hot is that. Very hot, yes? Now since I kind of crashed your little serious party, how would you like Jasmyne to dance for you? You would like that very much, yes? *Grinning, O’Hare goes to reply but the "Don Juan of Donegal" Sean McCann steps in and speaks into the microphone held by O’Hare.*McCann: I’d settle for something more than a dance, eh? *O’Hare pulls himself away from Sean and points his finger at him.*O’Hare: Back off! She’s mine. *He looks over at Mahavir after eyeing up Jasmyne for a second time.*O’Hare: All right, lad. I’ll have a dance with ya lack. And I’ll forget that this whole little interruption. Mahavir: Ha-ha! You are a smart man. But ah… there is a saying that “3’s a crowd”, yes? Normally, Jasmyne and I would welcome a third partner for some fun if you know what I say, yes? A little double the fun for ol’ Maha, eh? O’Hare: Yes… Mahavir: A little action from Jasmyne and her best friend, eh? O’Hare: (growing impatient) Yes… Mahavir: I have sexy time with two people, is what I’m saying. O’Hare: JUST GET TO THE POINT, YOU BLOODY GOBS***E! Mahavir: Whoa ho! Somebody is a little excited for some “Bollywood booty”, yes? Very well, what Mahavir is saying is that you get to dance, but your friends will have to take five. You understand, yes? No wallflowers. *Hesitant at first, O’Hare obliges and informs his team to exit the ring. As their coach brushes off any concern shown from his students. The four Irish youths exit the ring—Malone having to drag Liam out personally by demand of O’Hare—leaving only Coach O’Hare, Mahavir Abha and Jasmyne.*Mahavir: Ah, yes, yes. This is good, very good. More Sapphire, less Blue Oyster. They were making this real “sausage fest”, yes? Anyway, you look excited. You look ready, ha-ha! Music man, play music! Jasmyne, YOU DANCE!!! *Music begins to play and the strobe lights shine down on the center of the ring, where Jasmyne starts to bust a move in the seductive style that 99.9% of Bollywood—from big time producers to stage hands to security guards—have experienced with her (among other things). As she bumps and grinds to the music’s beat and against O’Hare, the stocky Irishman can’t help but get lost in the moment as he does a little dance as Jasmyne presses herself against him, flaunting her well endowed assets. With O’Hare lost in his own personal fantasy while Jasmyne shakes her backside in front of him, he is unable to notice the signal Mahavir gives Jasmyne, in the form of a thumb’s up and wink. Jasmyne smiles and winks back before bringing back O’Hare from his little trance with a back kick to the groin. The music comes to a sudden stop and the arena lights return to full brightness while the crowd laughs on at the scene in the ring: a gapped, wide-eyed Pat O’Hare hunched over and holding the area Jasmyne nailed with her cheap shot. It isn’t long though for the members of Team Ireland to rush back into the ring, led by the enforcer, Shane Malone. Before the Celtic Colossus can attack however, Mahavir shoves O’Hare into his direction where the coach’s head rams into Malone’s groin like a battering ram. With both men dazed, Mahavir hits O’Hare with a dropkick to the back and into Malone, causing both men to stumble out of the ring through the second and top rope. Malone was only the first wave however as just moments after Malone and O’Hare hit the floor, Aidan Donnelly and Sean McCann slide into the ring and attack Mahavir. Jasmyne can only stand back and watch the former tag champs double team her lover. When it appears that Mahavir is too stunned to fight back, Aidan and Sean whip him across the ring and go for a double clothesline. Much to their dismay and Jasmyne’s delight, Mahavir ducks and counters with dual clotheslines of his own, knocking both men down. He follows up with another pair of clothesline, sending both Aidan and Sean over the top rope and outside the ring. Mahavir turns just in time to see the 5th and final member of Team Ireland enter the ring. With demented eyes, Liam stands twitching and mumbling to himself while staring at Mahavir. Just as the Irish manic is about to rush towards the Bollywood Big Shot, Mahavir picks up the microphone and holds his hand up in front of Liam, halting the man’s charge.*Mahavir: Whoa! Whoa! Easy now, red. You take chill pill, yes? Take deep breath and listen to Mahavir. *Breathing rapidly, Liam glares at Mahavir, looking as if he could attack at any moment. This does not seem to bother Mahavir, however, as he remains cool as a cucumber.*Mahavir: Now, obviously you are angry at Mahavir and Jasmyne for bringing pain to your friends, yes? Well, they don’t like Mahavir and Mahavir don’t like them. Except you. *Liam arches an eyebrow, confused at what Mahavir is saying.*Mahavir: Yes, yes. You different than the others. You got ‘it’. What is ‘it’, you ask? Mahavir doesn’t know. ‘It’ is ‘it” and Mahavir has ‘it’ too. Mahavir sees something in you, something that says “excitement”. Something that says “charisma”. Something that says… ‘it’. You may have ‘it’, friend. But can you… dance? *Mahavir begins to snap his fingers.*1… 2… 1, 2, 3, 4!*The music (link above) begins to play and the strobe lights go back on as Mahavir begins to dance. He looks to Liam with an encouraging smile, to which the Irish youth awkwardly begins to follow his dance steps. Soon the two are dancing in unison and for the first time in a while, Liam is smiling and seems to be having a good time. Seeing his student dancing with a new nemesis in the ring sickens O’Hare to the point where he orders Malone to pull Liam out of the ring and carry him to the back. As the Irish members head up the aisle to the back, a restraint Liam begins screaming “I WANNA DANCE!!!” over and over. A dishearten Mahavir watches his momentarily dance partner disappear behind the curtain at the entrance stage, only to shrug and resume dancing with the beautiful Jasmyne.*
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Post by Koda, Master Crunchyroller on Jun 23, 2007 21:29:55 GMT -5
* "Welcome to the Jungle" by Guns & Roses begins to play *
The Cabinet strolls down to the ring, all walking with a cocky stride. As they walk, the crowd boos them loudly, so loud that they almost drowned out the sound of their music. They slide into the ring, and Grover Taft demands for a mic.
Grover: I think an explaination is in order. Over the last few months, Koda has been pushing us around, and we just sat there and took it! Well, we decided that once and for all that we wouldn't take his abuse anymore! So, we overthrew our "president" a few weeks ago. Also, we got to thinking, and came to the conclussion that, because we no longer have a President, we should no longer be The Cabinet. From this moment onward, the three of us are to be called Domination! And with this change, we usher in new aliases for us as well. From now on, I am to be called Danny Ashley, Calvin is to be referred to as Houston, and Rutherford is to be called Titan. That is all.
Danny Ashley drops the mic, and Domination leave the ring. They head up the ramp, when, as soon as Danny grabs the black curtain, he is hit with a double super kick. Danny falls back onto Houston and Titan. The attackers come out onto the stage, and it is revealed that it was Koda Kazar and Job Bher that attacked Danny Ashley. The crowd erupts into cheers at this revealation, as we fade to commercial.
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Spectre
Mike the Goon
"The echo of a point in time..."
Posts: 44
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Post by Spectre on Jun 23, 2007 22:19:05 GMT -5
<The crowd in San Paulo is hot, but there's some movement in the back on the entrance ramp side.>
<The crowd begins to part as a figure makes its way through, until, soon, Spectre comes into full view, leaping over the guardrail, and taking his usual seat to the side of the entrance ramp, looking like he's about to continue observing and spectating on the EWT...>
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Post by Tha Kid Joker on Jun 24, 2007 1:38:25 GMT -5
We return to EWT and the camera scopes the arena. An announcer stands in the ring, ready to announce the Ox-Division title match, but we first cut to Joey Styles and JBL.
Styles: Well, folks, we usually don't do this but... you've just gotta see this. What we have here is what used to be an EWT.com Exclusive, featuring what you didn't see of that Juri Sadamoto and Cassinova confrontation that you saw earlier.
The camera cuts to prerecorded footage, with a little logo in the corner that says, "EWT.com Exclusive". The camera follows Juri and Cassinova, who are looking at eachother while walking forward, apparently in the middle of a conversation.
Cassinova: Look, for you, I'm sure we could work something out as far as this stipulation goes. Maybe only two or three months will do.
Juri: (Rolling her eyes.) How sweet of you, Cass...
Cassinova: Cha... Say, you've got a sense of decision-making...
Juri: What makes you say that?
Cassinova: I don't know, just thought you'd dig the compliment. But what I was building up to is... Who do you think I should beat in a title defense next?
Juri: You mean, who do I think should challenge for your title next?
Cassinova: Let's be real, here. They aren't touching this strap. I just need a paycheck for the next PPV.
Juri: Don't be so sure. But now that you mention it, I wouldn't mind...
Before she can finish her sentence, a lockerroom door opens beside Juri and Cass. In any other circumstance, they would not have stopped, but they are halted by...
Jimmy Thunder: Well, well, well...
Jason Jupiter: Looks like ol' Cassidy Clearwater has gotten himself another girlfriend...
Terina: And I'm shocked to see who it is...
Juri looks a bit taken back by this, and opens her mouth to protest, but Cass cuts her off.
Thunder: HA!
Cassinova: Hey, don't get the wrong idea, now. I mean, I'm working on it... but she's a bit stubborn. Like some other people I known (He gives Terina a look.)
Terina: I prefer selective.
Juri: And I just have good taste.
At this, Cassinova raises his eyebrow before leaning towards Jupiter and Thunder. He whispers something in their ears, and the words "axle grease" are barely audible. Jupiter's eyes shoot to Juri for a split second, before he whispers something back to Cass. C-Nova laughs and leans back against the wall next to Juri, whose fingers twitch uncontrollably.
Juri: Cass, we're leaving. My match is soon and I...
Jupiter: Leaving, eh? Leaving where?
Thunder: (Looking at Jupiter with a raised eyebrow.) They're going to go play Scrabble with Zeleke and Ferhago Crow... Where do you think they're going?
Jupiter: Well I know what they're doing, but I wanted to hear him say it! And dammit, that moment is henceforth spoiled!
Meanwhile, Juri is continuously tugging Cass' arm, not really feeling up to the shenanigans.
Terina: So, you settled for...Cass? Well, there's a catch! Not MY first choice...but certainly not my last.
Cassinova: You say that like I'm not your dream husband.
Terina: Yeah, in your dreams.
Cassinova: And what do you mean, "settle"?
Terina: I'm not talking to you right now. I asked Juri a question.
Juri: 'Rina, if it was up to me, I wouldn't even be within earshot of... him.
She points to Cassinova, who has distracted himself by busting out the handheld mirror and hairbrush. They both look at him at the same time, before turning back to eachother.
Terina: I see your point. But he isn't half bad. I mean... he's attractive..
Juri: Disputable.
Terina: Puts on good matches?
Juri: Depends on what you're into.
Terina: Do you find him funny?
Juri: Let's be real.
Terina: Yes...let's. Well, since I'm sure this involves that whole "stipulation" incident, just know that it can't be long now before it ends.
Juri: I suppose we'll see.
Right next to them, Cass has put away his mirror and entered a conversation with Thunder and Jupiter. An alternate-angeled camera picks up their conversation.
Cassinova: Been a while since we partied. What have you two been up to lately?
Thunder: Same as usual.
Cassinova: Being better than everyone else?
Jupiter: Pretty much.
Cassinova: I feel you. Who're you facing this week?
Thunder: I don't know. Some nobodies from "NHWA" or something. Who do you have?
Cassinova: The lightweight champ from that company. But, between you and me, (He whispers.) I think I'm going to duck that match. After me and Juri handle our business, I'm catching the first non-boobytrapped limousine out of here.
Jupiter: (He whispers as well.) You're no-showing your match?
Cassinova: Cha, mane. I'm above fighting some featherweight independent loser. And come on, what's the worst that can happen?
Thunder: What if Oceanic makes you face the same person next week?
Cassinova: Yeah right. What're the odds? And if she does, I'll just duck out of it again until my message is clear: No indy bums!
Jupiter: Well, alright. But know that she has back-up...
Cassinova: What, you mean that Mail-Storm guy? What's he going to do? The rain dance? Trust me, I'll be alright.
Since this was recorded last week, Cass doesn't have any idea yet that Thunder and Jupiter were precise with their questions. Terina slips into the conversation, standing between Thunder and Jupiter.
Terina: So, Cass. Who's the #1 Contender to your title?
Cassinova: I'm not sure yet. No one has stepped up since they saw me take out Crausfail and the Happy Tree Friends at Crap-A-Mania. Who do you think I should face?
Off-camera Voice: I THINK I HAVE AN IDEA!
At once, everyone turns to face the person who exclaimed this, and each are very annoyed to see one Jack Jupiter attempting to lean cooly on the corridor wall. Jason facepalms as Thunder snickers, while Cass gives his trademark confused/outraged face.
Cassinova: Wh... Who the hell are you?
Jack: Everybody knows the great (Slips on the wall and crashes to the floor.) ...Jack Jupiter!
Jupiter: (Sighing.) Cassidy, you remember my cousin Jack.
Cassinova: You have cousins?
Thunder: Wow. I guess we forgot who we were talking to for a second, Jase.
Jupiter: I guess so. Cass, do you know what today is?
Cassinova: Very funny. I'll have you know that..
Jack: Uh, guys... still here. And don't ask if I hurt myself or anything. I'm sure my internal bleeding will take care of itself...
Cass' eyes go wild as if he just remembers something, and looks around in a panic.
Cassinova: Christ... where the hell did Jewelry go?
Jupiter: Sadanokio? She ran off a little bit ago, right before Terina asked you who was challenging for your title.
Jack: Uh... speaking of that. Mr. Clearwater, I would like to formally place a request to contend for your...
Cassinova: Damnit, I have to find her. I'll see you guys later. I...
Jupiter: What's the rush?
Thunder: Yeah. It's not like she can start without you.
Terina: Well...
Thunder and Jupiter both laugh as Cassinova looks kind of irked. He looks down at his watch once, looking very anxious.
Cassinova: Either way... I have to get going. I have to handle my bid'ness with Jewelry, and then look for somebody to fight at the next PPV...
At this, Jack finally springs to his feet and walks over there in a huff. He spins Cass around and begins to yell.
Jack: FOOL! YOU ARE GOING TO LISTEN TO ME! I WANT TO FACE YOU FOR YOUR TITLE AT THE PPV! (Clears throat.) Um.. please.
Nova looks shocked. His eyes dart back and forth for a minute, before he cautiously takes a step away from Jack.
Cassinova: Uh... sure, crazy guy. Whatever. You've got it.
Jack: (Blinking.) Just like that?
Cassinova: Sure. Not like you're a threat to me or anything. Just another paycheck in my wallet.
Jack: I wouldn't underestimate me if I were you.
Cassinova: Your use of pronouns confuse and offend me. But... I've gotta run. John...
Jack: Jack.
Cassinova: Uh.. it's Cass, actually. But John, I'll give you a week to think about your decision to feed yourself to EWT's greatest wrestler. If, by any chance that you decide to face your fears and further damage your win/loss record, then tell me next week, and I'll get it set up.
Jack: Sweet! I hope you enjoyed being Ox-Division Champion... but you better start preparing yourself to be the former Ox-Division Champion!
Cassinova: ...Yeah, whatever Jackass. I'll catch y'all on the flipside. Terina, bluetooth those pics to me.
Terina: (Smirking slightly.) Will do, Cass.
Thunder: What pics?
Jupiter: Yeah, what pics?
Terina: Just scans from the CAAPW Special.
Jack: I want to see 'em!
Jupiter: Sorry Jack. Nothing that reveals those two different things you focus your free time on trying to get--and failing!
(Jack blushes and frowns)
Terina: Yeah...they're harmless.
Cassinova: Right. Harmless.
Cassinova smirks, before turning around and walking away. Meanwhile, Jimmy and Jason question Terina on the matter, as Jack grins at the thought of being the next Ox-Division Champion.
The camera cuts back to the arena, now live: One week after the Exclusive. The camera moves around for a bit before steading on the entrance way. As it does, the air-y lead-in to "Square Dance" starts up, bringing everyone's attention to the ramp. After six seconds of this, the Italian-ish intro plays as the lights in the arena begin to swirl in circles, eventually all focusing on a single spot on stage. As the few bass beats of the song hit, Cassinova steps out into the spotlight, and shows off his Ox-Division Championship.
Announcer: Ladies and gentlemen, this next contest is scheduled for one fall, and is for the EWT Ox-Division Championship! Making his way to the ring, the defender. He hails from Los Angeles, California! Weighing in at 225 lbs... Cassinova!
Cass slowly walks down to the ring. A few excited fans hold their hand out to him, but he mutters something that sounds like, "Better than you.. better than you.." as he strolls past each of them. He slides into the ring and hands the referee his title belt, as he awaits his opponent--who will not win tonight.
Announcer: And the opponent... she hails from Las Vegas, Nevada...
Cass' ears perk up at the word "she".
Announcer: Weighing in at... good lord. (Talks to Cass.) Good luck, buddy. Weighing it 450 lbs... (Cass: WHAT?!?!).... She is the martyr of fat strippers everywhere... the NHWA, ha, LIGHT HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION.... GYRATE... MAHGROIN!
Jeff Jarrett's old WCW music starts up, (you know, "I wanna be a cowboy, baby..."), and out walks what looks like Roseanne Barr in a G-String. People immediately vomit, as the extreme stench of bacon grease and crushed childhood dreams radiate off of this woman as she slowly hobbles her ass down to the ring. She manages to get inside... somehow. Maybe the Crisco that it appears she covered herself in before coming out here tonight lubricated her enough to squeeze through the ropes.
Cassinova looks like he's going to be sick. He makes puking motions, before attempting to flee from the ring. Gyrate immediately grabs him and tries to lock in a bear-hug as the bell rings, and the concentrated chicken fat or whatever the hell is on her allows for him to slip on out the hold. He takes the time out to look at all of the vile substances that rubbed off of this woman onto his chest. He groans, before Gyrate slowly rolls at him for some... kind of weird move-esque thingy. Cass sidesteps the former stripper, and she continues to run or roll or whatever she's doing, right into a corner. With her prone, Cass slowly backs up into the opposite corner. He then takes a deep breath, preparing himself for the worst, and runs towards Gyrate. As he does, she suddenly turns around and bends over, waiting for him to... arrive.
Once the smell hits Cassinova, he pretty much drops and appears to be dead. Gyrate, knowing this is how she got the Light Heavyweight Championship, celebrates as if she already won. The crowd, entertained, cheers the woman in pseudo-horrific delight. As she celebrates, Cass slowly begins to come to life. He makes his way to a crouched position, before suddenly springing on her with a surprise schoolboy!
To Cass' shock and horror, his entire arm disappears in Gyrate's fat folds. The large woman then proceeds to somehow contract her inner-folds, squeezing Cass' arm and attempting to pull it from it's socket! Eventually, and after much fright for the fate of one of his favorite limbs, Cass manages to pull the arm free--pulling out a little Dum Dum lollipop. Gyrate's eyes grow large with envy at such a treasure, and immediately rips it out of Cass' hand! She throws him aside and begins to suck on the lollipop which she probably hasn't seen in three years--about the time when she saw her feet. Cass, seeing this "woman" slobbing down the lollipop like she was in the VIP room of the Player's Lounge, slowly backs himself into a corner. Like a teen girl in a scary movie, he has nowhere to go, nowhere to hide, and probably left the curling iron on at home.
After inhaling the lollipop and half of the oxygen in the room, Mahgroin sets her eyes on an even more delectable morsel... Cassinova. Just now noticing what a hunk he is, she grins her f'ed up, inbred smile and slowly walks over to him. Cass yells out in terror, and runs right past her to the other corner. She smiles, knowing that he's playing hard to get, and tries again. He runs past her once more, and it finally dawns on her.
She knows what he wants. She knows what he likes.
Gyrate fixes her eyes on Cassinova, and slowly reaches for the back of her string bikini top. She slowly begins to undo the size 40SS (Seek Surgery) top, as Cassinova just looks on, bracing himself. Eventually, Gyrate just stops... and her face begins to turn blue. She grabs at her throat, coughing and making weird gargling sounds that would scare the ever-loving s*** out of Satan. After about 15 seconds of this, Gyrate drops to her knees, and onto the ground.
Ladies and gentlemen, Gyrate Mahgroin has put herself in an unconscious state, due to her choking on her own neckfat. Cass, staring at her like the aforementioned teen girl in a horror movie, slowly and cautiously approaches her. He gets about two inches away from her, before she suddenly sits up and glares at him wickedly! This scares all of the air out of Cass, who jumps back and boots her in the face! He quickly pins her!
1...
2...
3!
The bell rings, and this one is officially over.
Announcer: Here's your winner... and STILL EWT Ox-Division Champion... Cassinova!
"Square Dance" starts back up, as Cassinova stands and rubs the disgusting slime from Gyrate's body off of him. He looks at Mahgroin in disgust, and slowly nudges her out of the ring before tiredly asking for a microphone. The fans are still booing him wildly, and Cassinova makes it to his feet in anger. Taking some time to breathe as his theme song fades out, he finally manages to get the words out.
Cassinova: (Panting.) Shut up! Shut up, all of you! (A few more breaths.) Just listen to you animals. I put on a 8-star classic, and you boo me? What's wrong with you?
The fans respond by booing more. Cass covers his ears for a while, before yelling again.
Cassinova: Ugh... You make me want to puke! I should be the one getting cheered around here, but no! I get more heat than Arizona in July! And... and look at who you're actually cheering for. Let's be real, I mean... Spyke Johannson?
Loud pop for the Gen Tech member.
Cassinova: Oh, shut up. I threw him off of a scaffold and turned him into a drunken emo kid for a couple months. Remember that? (Boos.) Yeah, I guess you do. Hell, I've even heard a few cheers for EWT's resident fetish-encourager, Crauswell.
If only because Cass doesn't like him, the crowd cheers him as well.
Cassinova: Whoops! I handed his ass to him in the Extinction Chamber, he took a dive from a high place just like Spyke did, and I changed his outlook on life too!
A lot more boos, as Cass looks around saying, "It's true. It's true."
Cassinova: Hm... who else do you all cheer. Uh... Mysth? You do cheer Mysth, right? (Cheers.) That Rated whatever guy that's too bland for me to remember the name of? You know, the one who's career I ruined in an instant.
At this, someone from the crowd yells out, "Chad Michaels, douchebag!"
Cassinova: Hey now, no need to call him names. (Boos.) And all kidding aside, that was probably ol' Chaddy who just said that. Get a life, Michaels! But anyway, who else do you idiots cheer. Oh, how about that... Jobby guy? (A lot of cheers for Jobby McJ.) Hah... fools. God, who else. Hm... what's the name of that... that bum that Synthetic Hair-is always hangs out with?
Loud pop for the EWT Legend. Chants of "Ragnal! Ragnal!" starts up, and Cass' face twists with grief.
Cassinova: Ah, yes! Joey frickin' Ragnal, that's the guy! You people sure do pick some strange people to cheer for. Especially since you boo me, and I'm obviously better than them in every way possible. (Loud boos begin to start back up.) I mean, I'm entertaining... I'm charming... Unless you're Demetri Martin, Chappelle, that guy who sat behind me in Geometry, or a few other people I can name, I'm probably funnier than you. I'm sexy...
A single female fan cheers wildly, while the rest of the crowd listens in silence.
Cassinova: (Long pause, before pointing in the direction of the fan.) See? There ya go! I'm a far superior wrestler, I put on a greater show, EWT wouldn't be nearly as entertaining without me, and... and I'm just an all around better person.
Loud boos, particularly from some fans in the front row. Furiously, Cass walks over to the ropes nearest to them, standing his right leg on the bottom rope and left leg on the middle rope while pointing at them.
Cassinova: F*** you, I'm better!
Massive boos for this outburst. Cass moves some hair out of his eyes and steps back into the middle of the ring.
Cassinova: Well, either way you slice it, you know I'm better. You just don't want to admit it. And if anybody has anything prove around here, I'm the person they have to prove it to! (Boos are becoming deafening.) So if somebody wants to step up in this place, holler at me now, or suffer later!
With that, he throws the mic down, causing it to cackle over the PA system. He then scoops up his title from the referee's hands, and makes his way toward the ropes. He drops down and rolls out of the ring, preparing to head backstage...
Before Silvertide's "Ain't Coming Home" hits. Cass looks vaguely... confused... but nods his head to the music anyway. The camera catches his face, and he appears to say "Hey! AC/DC!" as he nods along to the music. Before long, Jack Jupiter walks out from behind the curtain, holding a microphone. As he does, his music fades out and he begins to speak.
Jack: Woah woah woah... did I just hear you correctly?
Cass, looking slightly annoyed, but mostly uninterested, as he turns back around and rolls into the ring. He picks up his microphone, and isn't afraid to use it. Jack continues...
Jack: People looking to prove themselves have to go through you? Have you even proved yourself? How long have you been here?
Cassinova: (Sighing.) Longer than you..
Jack: That's not the point!
Cassinova: Long enough to win more titles than you have...
Jack: Still not the point! Well, kinda is the point...
Cassinova: And thus, long enough to become a champion in five months, which is one more title than most people have won in their entire EWT career.
Jack: Yeah, well... okay. But, but! ...You have never beaten me!
Cassinova raises an eyebrow at this.
Cassinova: Yeah? Well I've never kidnapped a little British girl before. Doesn't mean that I can't.
Major heat for this. Not a fan in the arena who doesn't boo this remark.
Cassinova: Oh... oh come on! I can't make fun of that little British girl? (The crowd screams "NO!" in unison.) Psh, you guys are lame. Man, f*** that girl...
Note from the writer: Please don't hate me.
Jack: Cass, all joking aside, I think you know what I'm about to say! And you just don't want to...
Cassinova: Johnny, Johnny, Johnny... you can expose your sexuality later. Right now, you're blocking my exit, and I really need to go see about Jewelry, so please...
Jack: SHUT THE HELL UP!
Cassinova: ?!?!
Jack: Stop talking and listen! You don't want me to formally challenge for that title, because you know that I can beat you!
Cass looks... shocked. His face can only be described as, "Holy s***, James Brown just rose from the grave and dunked on Shaq in an NBA game."
Cassinova: Are... you... serious...
Jack: Serious as a heart attack, fella!
Cassinova: Yeah? Well I'm triple-bypass. You must be outside of your mind to believe something so obviously wrong. Junior... let me tell you a little bedtime story...
Jack looks unamused as Cass continues.
Cassinova: This is a story about the greatest wrestler of all time. A wrestler who has toppled giants and punted midgets. A wrestler who has had many a-woman, and kicked many a-ex-boyfriend's ass. A wrestler who once walked into his bedroom to go to sleep, flipped the switch, and was undressed and in the bed before the room got dark. A wrestler that...
Jack: Enough! I want that title shot you promised me! You! Me! A Soundless Dawn! And when you face the REAL Jack Jupiter, you'll regret the day (Jack's voice cracks like a sledgehammer through a glass window) you were born!
Cassinova: Good gracious you have an annoying voice. I wish you were A Soundless... eh, that wasn't going anywhere. Either way, (Shrugs.) You've got it. Just don't cry to your Simple Plan albums when I embarass you in front of everyone.
Jack: Well... uh... don't go crying to your nice car and designer clothes when I... damnit. Let me try again: ...See you at the PPV, B****!
Jack throws his microphone down like a rockstar, breaking it and walking backstage. Cassinova looks... vaguely amused, as he departs the ring to go see about the birthday girl: Juri Sadamoto.
FADE TO COMMERCIAL
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Post by brokenrose on Jun 24, 2007 1:58:39 GMT -5
*Juri opens the door of her locker room and slams it shut. She leans against it, looking weary and red in the face... Most likely from some earlier events.*
Juri: ARRRGGHHH! All I wanted to do was drink, but no... I had to have my day ruined.
*This of course suggests that maybe she's not blushing due to alcohol. She sighs and brushes the hair from her almost jade colored eyes, pausing to look at her scarred palm.*
*pause*
Juri: ...Twenty-five... Where does the time go...
*She slides down the down into a seat position as she bows her head. The fiery hair of hers covering her face. Her position changes as she leans back, resting her head on the door.*
Voice: I take it I missed a great party... Either that or you are ducking from a bad one.
*Juri rolls her head to the side to see Axel, holding some sort of box.*
Juri: *quick grin* Neither, I'm drunk off my gourd. *She turns her head back to face forward.*
Axel: If you were drunk, you wouldn't able to know that you were.
Juri: *She lightly snorts* Odd that you seem to an expert of me now. Not like that knowledge just magically comes to you. Baka.
Axel: ...
Juri: *Staring forward still* If you were expecting me to throw myself at you because you went to the 99 cent store, you are gravely mistaken. What is it with you Californian boys? Why do you all feel the need to screw with me?
Axel: I think it's the clash of left over Hawaiian air and fresh LA smog.
Juri: Or pot.
Axel: ...For some people.
Juri: Just go. Leave me alone. I know what you are trying to do... You feel forced to pay me back after what I did on your birthday. Look, I did that only because I felt sorry for you. I knew you wouldn't tell anyone like anyways then mope around like your pathetic self because everyone doesn't celebrate the “great” Axel Halaway.
Axel: *Red in the face* You know what? Screw you! Screw you and your damn honor! Don't you realize it was hard for me too!? If you hadn't noticed, I have sworn off women! I have not sought any girl and even turned down a few! You think it was so easy for me? That I didn't care at all about you? Maybe if you would stop being so damn selfish, maybe you would have realized that maybe I cared about you a bit too much and I still do! HAPPY smurfIN' BIRTHDAY! *He throws the small box at her feet and storms off.*
*Awkward pause.*
*She picks up the box at her feet and opens it. Her eyes sweep over the contents before she quickly closes it. The box is pressed into her chest as she hugs her knees.*
*Fade to commercial.*
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Post by crauswell on Jun 24, 2007 13:17:52 GMT -5
As we return from commercial, we see Crauswell, arms folded, as he leans back against the nearby wall, seeming like his old self, at least right now. He looks at the screen, seeming quite angry and not at all like he's been the past few weeks.
Crauswell: I am not sexist... I do not hate women and I may not agree with Voltigeur or his ideals of chivalry and such, but if there's one thing that I do hate... that is abuse of power. You see Miss Oceanic, though some of your intentions over the past few weeks have been quite pure, you seem to be very fragile when it comes to handling uncomforting words, like those of my friend. Yes, when you heard that not everyone was pleased with your reign, you decided to make an example of him... by pitting him against four ruthless beings and teaming him with a partner who would turn turn out unreliable in the end. Yet, that very same man did exactly as you commanded... not just to keep his Toolshed Title, but to prove that he wasn't afraid of anything that you would throw at him.
The furry nods to himself, leaning a bit further back now, as he continues speaking in this rather dark tone.
Crauswell: Now you see miss, I don't appreciate when people try and mess with my allies like that, because you see... I know alot about standing up for my allies. Sure, for awhile, the only one's I've had were those donning suits similar to my own... but I've changed in the past few weeks, reflected on my possible mistakes, and I believe that I've become a better person for it. YOU however... have become quite the opposite. You've become corrupt... perhaps a bit egomaniacal, maybe even a bit power hungry. Now, that's not to say all of your actions have been bad... but if you're gonna punish only one person that's made a few negative words about you, then you should punish everyone of them you hypocritical harpie! I DARE YOU TO TRY AND PUNISH ME YOU TYRANNICAL pup! I DARE YOU TO TRY TO BREAK ME... FOR PREVENTING ONE OF YOUR SO CALLED "JUSTIFIED PUNISHMENTS" FROM HAPPENING! I WANT YOU TO REPRIMAND ME... FOR STANDING UP AND STRIKING DOWN THOSE ABOVE YOU, PUTTING THEM IN THESE RIDICULOUS SELFISH MATCHES FOR YOUR OWN AMUSEMENT! WHETHER IT'S VIRUS....VOLTIGEUR... OR ANYONE ELSE!!! So yes... I DARE YOU to try and make me change my tune... pit me in a handicap match with Big and Bad... put me in a battle royal with half the damn roster with my hands tied behind my back... hell, pit me against that aquatic beast of yours... it doesn't matter, because I will run right through all these obstacles and end your idiotic decision making once and for all! So yes miss... I dare you, set me up... let's see what twisted task you'll give me... because I'll be ready and willing to complete it with ease and show you no matter how you abuse your power, IT SHALL NOT F***ING MATTER!
Crauswell backs off against the wall, giving off a very cold presence, before turning and walking away as we cut to the next segment.
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Post by Koda, Master Crunchyroller on Jun 25, 2007 2:34:16 GMT -5
We fade in from commercials to the backstage area, in the main locker room. Koda and Job are sitting down, both opening a bottle of ramune.
Koda: Thanks for saving me, man.
Job: Don't mention it, of course, I hope you didn't get the impression that I've forgiven you. I just couldn't stand watching something like that going down. In fact, you were just lucky that the doctors said I was good to go the day before the attack. Otherwise, I don't know where you'd be right now.
Koda: Hey, I don't want you to forgive me yet. I haven't earned it yet. However, if we should ever somehow find ourselves lucky enough to be holding the tag titles, then we'll be on even terms.
Job: I hear that!
Koda and Job tap their bottles together in a toast, and take a drink. Just then, Danny Ashley, and the rest of Domination, appear in the door way. Koda shoots up to his feet, and gets into Danny's face. Job stands up as well, ready to hold Koda back should it come to blows.
Danny: Whoa, whoa, whoa! It doesn't need to come to punches right now. After your little attack, I went and had everything set up for us to have a match at At the Soundless Dawn. The F.O.G. versus the Domination Creation Station Nation!
Koda: I thought your name was just Domination....now you increased your name to rip off one of the teams from Arena?
Danny: WHAT?! Hell no! We thought of this ourselves!
Job: Suuuurrrreeee ya did. That's real original.
Danny: Alright, I've had enough! Just get this through your thick skulls. At AtSD, it will Domination Creation Station Nation standing over the bodies of F.O.G., for I will PERSONALLY give you, and you, both a Dominator. I will break you both in half!
Koda: Ok, you may say you'll win, but I doubt we'll lose to a group called Dominatrix Creatrix Statrix Matrix.
Danny: I told you, we are Domination Creation Station Nation! Damn it!
Job: Ya, well, I've had enough of you for one night, so why don't you leave this room before I shove my size d20 boots up your ass!
Danny: Oh, I'm shaking, I'm being threatened by the E.V.S.!
Koda: E.V.S.?
Danny: Everlasting Virgin Squad.
Houston and Titan start laughing along with Danny at this.
Job: Oh that does it....
Job Bher goes to punch Danny Ashley, but Koda holds Job Bher back.
Koda: Job, don't do it! It isn't worth it! Don't do it! Don't do it!
All while Koda is saying this, Job Bher calms down.
Koda: Let me!
Koda spins around before anyone could register what he said, and Koda smashes Danny Ashley in the temple with his right fist. Danny gets up, holding the side of his head.
Danny: You'll regret that......
As Danny and the rest of Domination begin to walk off, Danny shouts from the end of the hall.
Danny: NNNNNNEEEEEEEEEEEEEERRRRRRRRDDDDDDSSSSSSSS!!!!!!
Koda and Job just laugh, sit down, and continue to drink their ramune.
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Post by The Lach is very tired on Jun 25, 2007 6:27:39 GMT -5
*Where The Party's At hits & everyone is shocked. Spaz comes out with his left arm in a sling.*
S: I know many of you will be shocked to see me. I have retired this is true. But I couldn't leave EWT without a proper farewell. So I am here to announce that at the next EWT PPV I will compete in the EWT ring for the last time. I will finally resolve this situation with Ratings. For the very last time in an EWT ring it will be Spaz v Ratings!
*The crowd goes wild & Spaz salutes & heads back out the back.*
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Post by williamo on Jun 26, 2007 13:24:38 GMT -5
¢
£
A
¥ *"No One Knows" by Queens of the Stone Age begins as the familiar symbols flash up on the screen. Richard Clay makes his entrance, revelling somewhat in the audience's dislike for him.* David Penzer: The following contest is scheduled for one fall. Introducing first, from Cash Mountain, weighing in at 262lbs "THE KILLIONAIRE"... RICHARD CLAY!!! *Clay steps on in to the ring with a smirk as the crowd continues to hurl hatred in his direction.*
*"No One Knows" fades out & is replaced by "Sweden". The crowd lets out a cheer for Liam O'Neill as he nervously walks on down the ramp.* Penzer: And his opponent, from Cork, Ireland, weighing in at 209lbs... LIAM... O... NEILL!!! *Liam gets into the ring & stands opposite Clay looking around in a slightly twitchy fashion. Then the bell rings.*
DING-DING!
*The Irishman & the Killionaire lock-up. Liam surprises Clay by getting a slight advantage & forcing him back to the ropes. The ref steps in & gives the two men a 5 count to break things up. Liam releases his grip on Clay. As Liam moves to back up, Clay gives him a hard slap across the face. Liam runs at Clay with fists flying & attempts to lay in a battering on the Killionaire. Clay holds on to the rope & the referee forces Liam back again. Clay gets a slight smirk on his face & as the referee holds Liam back for a moment, Clay launches himself from the ropes & knocks Liam down with a clothesline. Clay follows up with a quick elbow drop & goes for a cover...* 1... 2... KICKOUT! *Liam & Clay get to their feet again & Clay whips Liam off the ropes. Clay aims to catch Liam with a back body drop, but he telegraphs it & Liam sweeps Clay's legs. Liam tries to lock in a Spinning Toe Hold, but Clay kicks him off towards the ropes. Liam rebounds & Clay, still on his back, uses his feet to Monkey Flip Liam across the ring. Both men are quick to get to their feet again. Liam catches Clay's leg & gives him a Dragon Screw. Maintaining the hold, Liam tries to cinch in a Figure 4 leg Lock. Clay, however, grabs the bottom rope before Liam can attempt to fully get the hold in. Clay continues to hold the ropes as he gets back to his feet. Clay bounds off the ropes again, aiming for another Clothesline on Liam, but Liam catches Clay's arm & locks in a Fujiwara Armbar! Liam is cranking the pressure down on Clay's arm; twisting it & kneading the elbow joint, driving his own elbow into the joint. Clay is in obvious pain, but he struggles through & manages to get a hand on the bottom rope. The referee again forces Liam to let go of the hold.*
*Liam backs off & Clay continues to stick close to the ropes in order to avoid Liam's submission holds. Clay forces Liam's hand. O'Neill runs at Clay, as Clay pulls down the top rope & Liam goes sailing out of the ring. Liam stands up outside the ring, looking around a little bit confused. He doesn't stand for much longer as Clay crashes down on top of him. Clay picks Liam up by the hair & rolls him back into the ring. Clay attempts another cover of O'Neill...*
1...
2...
KICKOUT!
*Clay slaps the mat in frustration. He brings Liam back to his feet & hits him with the "LSE Trip". Clay goes for a cover again, but Liam landed with one of his feet under the ropes. Clay drags Liam back to a standing position, but Liam fights back with a few elbows to Clay's gut. He follows up by kicking Clay's legs viciously, with Clay's legs weakened, Liam lifts the Killionaire up for a Knee Breaker. Clay manages to reverse the move into a modified Bulldog & plants Liam squarely in the middle of the ring. Clay hangs back a bit to catach his breath. Liam is just barely able to push himself back up . Liam gets to his knees & can't really seem to go much further. Clay runs at the kneeling Liam & delievers a sickening kick right to Liam's face. Liam is knocked backwards. His knees still on the mat, but his back is bent so far backwards that his head is nearly touching the mat too. Clay gets Liam back in position for another kick. As Clay runs at Liam again, O'Neill gets his hands up & prevents Clay's boot from connecting with his mush. Liam takes Clay to the ground & tries locking in the "Irish Shamrockleaf" again. Clay wriggles his way free from Liam's grasp & uses his legs to send the Irishman off to the ropes. Clay nips back to his feet & catches Liam on his return. He executes the "Killionaire Krunch" & makes the cover...*
1...
2...
3!
DING-DING-DING!
Penzer: Here, is your winner... "THE KILLIONAIRE"... RICHARD... CLAY!!!
*As Clay head back up the ramp, he is met by Joe One.* Joe One: Is it near time? Clay: Not yet... but soon. *The two head on to the back as Liam only just sits up in the ring.*
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Oak: Certified Jade Hater
Bill S. Preston, Esq.
Edgier than Wayne Brady, Harder than Chinese Arithmetic, and Higher than the ratings for Blade: The Series
TOP ROPE CATCH A VIBE YEAH I SWERVE WHEN I DRIVE
Posts: 15,390
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Post by Oak: Certified Jade Hater on Jun 26, 2007 22:00:09 GMT -5
The opening bars of Linkin Park's "Faint" begin as the lights die out. As the main guitar kicks in, Chad Michaels walks out, looking different than before. His hair has grown out, now fully covering his eyes, and sideburns have grown a la Matt Hardy, joining his soul patch. His shorts have been replaced by Blue short tights, with a yellow phoenix on the left side and CM Punk-type fists on the right. His shoes have been replaced by blue boots with yellow kickpads, and he's wearing white elbow and kneepads. He's also sporting blue taped wrists, and has a tattoo of a black heart above his own.
Announcer: The following contest is a singles match. First, from Miami, Florida, weighing in at 246 lbs., He is "The Suicidal".... CHAD! MICHAELS!!
Michaels slides into the ring and walks towards the turnbuckles before leaning against them, his face showing a small grin on his face. "Faint" fades out as "No Remorse" by The Corps (Sorry, haven't watched ROH in a while) begins to play. Out comes "Mr. Charismatic" Roderick Strong, followed by Rocky Romero and Davey Richards. Strong enters the ring as the No Remorse Corps stand guard on the outside.
Announcer: And his opponent, from New Orleans, Louisiana, weighing in at 210 lbs., he is the "Messiah of the Backbreaker" and the leader of the No Remorse Corps, RODERICK!! STRONG!!
Strong enters the ring as Michaels gets to his feet. Strong and Michaels move to the center of the ring where the referee calls for the bell. Michaels and Strong throw their arms up and lock together, both pressing against one another. Strong eventually gets an upper footing and pushes Michaels back foot after foot towards the corner turnbuckle. Strong throws on one last heave and pushes Michaels directly into the post and holds him there. In usual form, Michaels lets go of the hold while Strong pushes back on him. Strong is told by the referee to let go of the hold, which he reluctantly does so. Strong however immediately chops Michaels quickly across the chest followed by a blatant and somewhat effective cheapshot that lowers Michaels off his feet and slouching in the turnbuckle.
Strong pushes his way past the referee and hoists up Michaels by the arm. He continues his arm hoisting and simply turns it into a whip into the opposing turnbuckles. Michaels collides once again with a mighty thud that drives his head slightly further than the rest of his body travelled. Strong charges and knees Michaels in the midsection while he tries to connect an elbow with Michaels' Face. The referee breaks it up just as Michaels pushes back on the lighter superstar and tries to launch his own assault. As the referee pushes Michaels back, Strong throws another sucker punch that connects right with Michaels' kidneys, doubling him over.
Strong whips Michaels at the ropes this time and sinks a kick over at his head. Michaels however ducks and Strong falls to the ground. Michaels hits the ropes again and charges back at Strong who is scrambling to his feet. Michaels lowers his head but Strong gets an arm up and snampmares him down. Strong instinctively goes for the pin.
1..............
Michaels Kicks out.
Strong gets his bearing after seemingly hitting that last move on instinct. He shakes his head as Michaels begins to get to his own feet, the time possibly costing Strong dearly. Strong finally gets bearing and he moves over to Michaels, who is on his knees swaying like a twig. Strong bends over to hoist him up, but as he does, Michaels lashes out with his fingers curled and rakes Strong’s eyes. Strong falls back suddenly but, like all of Strong’s efforts at cheating, were unseen by the referee.
Michaels lays out with a series of punches at Strong’s face, Strong stepping backwards with each successive blow... until a chop hits Michaels' chest. Michaels riles back with another punch but Strong hits a second chop! Michaels once again hits a punch and Strong riles back with a chop... that Michaels ducks. Strong spins on the spot and Michaels leaps at the chance, hoists Strong up, and hits a Half Nelson Backbreaker!!
Crowd: STRONG GOT SERVED!! STRONG GOT SERVED!!
Michaels is up again and jumps on Strong, delivering an elbow across his neck. Michaels goes for the pinfall.
1.................
2.......
Strong kicks out as the Corps look on, a little worried.
Michaels is up again and hoists Strong to his feet. Michaels grabs Strong by the scruff of his hair and yanks him up. Michaels looks over at the end of the ring and sees his chance. He throws Strong over and out at the ropes, lifting him up slightly at the end and propelling him over the top rope. Michaels looks away as Strong secretly and quite miraculously lands on his feet on the apron. Michaels, in the arrogant wrestler way, has not yet noticed. Strong seizes his chance and tries to reach for Michaels' head, but Michaels is too quick, blocking Strong's arm and lays a punch out with his own that knocks Strong back, but he grips on ever so slightly. Michaels sees this and tries once more but Strong still holds on, even after a well aimed punch to the face. Michaels tries one more trick as he bounces off the ropes and come back at Strong with his arm raised above his head. He hits Strong with a diving Lariat from Heaven that sends Strong flipping off the ring apron and to the ground!
At this point, the camera twirls to the NR Corps, who have gone from worried to full blown nervous. Richards goes to help Strong up as Romero hops onto the apron, taunting Michaels. Romero starts yelling at Michaels, who finally notices him. Michaels starts to walk towards him, a cocky look in his eye. As he goes to confront Romero, Michaels falls forwards and collapses on the ropes. We look in the ring to see Davey Richards on the floor behind him, obviously having dropkicked Michaels from behind. Romero laughs voraciously at this event as Richards rolls from the ring, but not fast enough as the referee sees the No Remorse Corp member escaping and calls for the bell.
*Ding Ding*
Announcer: The winner of this match, as result of disqualification... “The Suicidal" Chad Michaels!!
Strong is up by now and enters the ring, picking up Chad and hitting him with a vicious backbreaker. The rest of the NR Corps enter the ring and start triple teaming him, attacking him with punches and kicks. Suddenly.... the ligths die out. A piano tune can be heard as the Toomitron shows various shots of Los Angeles at night.
PA System: God...... Forgive Me....
As the lights turn back on, Mike Corral and Austin Aries are standing in the ring, behind the NR Corps. The NR Corps are fully focused on the Toomitron, still playing the shots of LA. Aries approaches Strong as Mike gets behind Romero and Chad (who has now recovered) gets behind Richards. Almost at the same time, Aries hits a vicious Dragon Suplex, Mike hits a Cobra Clutch Lungblower, and Chad hits the Kiss Your Rated X Goodbye. The NR Corps roll out of the ring as Aries, Corral, and Michaels stand in the ring, triumphant.
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Post by raftshack on Jun 27, 2007 14:34:51 GMT -5
We cut to the back to see Zeleke and Faboon, back to their normal spastic selves, running wildly around in circles in the hallway, random people passing and just kind of looking... confused, Zeleke donning a sideways baseball cap and nothing more than heart boxers and a bright yellow tanktop. Faboon is dressed in an army beret, a pair of goggles, and what looks like a pair of red parachute pants, both men also quite barefoot.. The two don't seem to care as everyone's favorite insane submission obsessed interviewer walks up, looking on in awe.
Armbar: Holy armbar... what's are you two so armbarred up about?
Zeleke stops, turning around slowly and walking behind, reaching down and rubbing this man's stomach, looking on in some kind of lustful look. Faboon watches on, taking many steps back, then head bobbing in place as he watches.
Zeleke: Why my horridly handsome created creature... why do you deem it so necessary to be of asking to my snout?
Armbar: .... Ummm, I get armbarred to armbar people.
Zeleke: Oh, most reality? WHY DID YOU NOT SIMPLY STATE THIS FACTOID?! Does thine foolish oaf taketh me for the punky rooster?
Armbar: ...armbar?
Zeleke reaches over and brushes over the masked cheek of Armbar, grinning wide now, as he steps in place.
Zeleke: Your skinning... feels like some lovely material other than skinning...
Armbar: That's because it's an armbar.
Zeleke jumps back in shock now... staring on intently.
Zeleke: YOU LIE MOSTLY!!!
Faboon walks over, dragging Zeleke by the arm now and headbutting him in the face, sending him stumbling back into the wall.
Faboon: Most apologeticness is incurred to yo bro. Now begin the intergation you toilet!
Armbar: ARMBAR?!
Faboon: Your offensive taking makes me want to murder a peach... began speaking and spakking!!!
Armbar: Alright then. Well, last armbar, it seems that you and Armbar over there decided to play some mind armbars with the biggest and baddest armbars this side of the Armbar. My armbar to you is... ARE YOU ARMBAR?!
Faboon begins chortling to himself, before looking back at Armbar, a very angry look on his face now.
Faboon: THOSE FIPPLE FAPS HAD DESERVATION OF OUR DEEDS! If they want to throw about their girthfulness in pure blind eyed ness, well then... I'm afraid the battallion shall be scramblied. Those finks not know of what bodes beneath my very hat... slowly molding and forming into a tower of anticipated furiousity! THEY ARE FOOLISH DINGLE BOTTOMS... AND THERE SUFFERANCE WILL BE QUITE SWIFTY AND THRIFTY!!!
Zeleke has meanwhile during this speech snuck back up on an unaware Armbar, immediately leaping onto his back and clinging close, bouncing up and down as he does so, as Faboon continues to rant.
Faboon: THE PURPLE SUN SHALL RISE IN THE WEST... THEN AGAIN IN THE NORTHSOUTH... THEN ABOVE MY VERY NOSE!!! THE NOSE OF DESTINILITY THAT DWELLS IN THE BUILDING OF BEINGS.... BEINGS THAT SUFFER AND SOIL THEMSELVES AT THE VERY NOTIONING THAT OUR VENGING APPROACHS UPON THE MIGHT HORIZON OF FAILING... THE WINDS OF WINDFILLITY BLOWS GUSTS THAT SPELL OUT THE VERY DESTINIFULNESS THAT WE CONTAIN INSIDE OUR BEAUTIFUL BEINGS...
Zeleke suddenly grabs Armbar's mask and starts to pulling it off, with a sick looking grin on his face, as Armbar suddenly starts screaming, running wildly around in circles, as Faboon STILL doesn't notice this, the pink haired being eventually pulling the mask loose, just in time for Armbar to throw him off and scamper away down the hallway, as Zeleke flips back to his feet, staring at his tag partner quite curiously.
Faboon: ... THE INFAMY SOLDIERS RIDE IN THE NOON... AND THEY SHALL TAKE THE ZEPPELIN OF MOST VICTORY INTO THE HAPPY SKIES... SAILING MOST SWIFTFUL INTO THE BOWELS OF THE DEVIL FROG TO A WARRING OF MOST INACCURATE INEPTITUDE!!!
Faboon pants, catching his breath now, finally noticing that Armbar has left. Zeleke is now wearing Armbar's mask, running in circles around his tag team partner, who watches, tripping him, then cackling with glee, as Zeleke bounces off the floor... giggling in response. Faboon then reaching down and smacking Zeleke aside the head.
Faboon: CLUMSY BROOM! Our speaking wizard has vamoosed with most hastefuliality. ARE YOU PROUDENED?!
Zeleke nods, sitting up and rubbing at his mask with most joy, as Faboon watches, slowly moonwalking away from his tag partner, who growls... then walks on all fours after, swiping at the air randomly as he does.
Suddenly Armbar runs back in, now wearing a paper bag over his face, with eyeholes cut out.
Armbar: Now armbar... where were we?
He looks to see the duo has left.
Armbar: ... GOOD ARMBAR!!!
We quickly fade to commercial.
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Post by radicalbuttercup on Jun 27, 2007 14:56:35 GMT -5
*Opening shot to an apartment. The windows and blackout blinds and curtains are closed. A lump on a black bed doesn't seem to move. Fuchsia blankets suddenly jerk...but then is still. A groan can be heard.*
*The windows are suddenly flung open letting a bright day of sunshine come flooding in. A cheerful voice comes ringing out* Madi: Tiiiiime to wake up, sleepy head!
*The vicious word that gets mysteriously bleeped out can only be one woman. And she isn't in the pleasantest of moods. In fact, disturbing coughing can be heard from far beneath the pounds of blankets muffling her head.*
Synthy: ........BLEEP.
Madi: E-Erm.. *Madison looks a bit surprised by the cursing as she peeks down at the figure underneath the blanket. She extends a finger and begins to poke away at it* ..Synthy..I know ya don't feel good..but I think I may have found the cure!
*The blankets shake for a second, and the upper most top one is flung at Madison by a mysterious pearly arm that popped up from beneath the blankets. Syn:...That last cure was making me listen.....to.....*COUGHSNEEZE* ....The Cure for three days.....solid...... *her voice is raspy.*
*Madison is covered by the blanket, looking like some kind of terrible ghost on Halloween. She speaks with a muffled voice* ..I thought Robert Smith could help! His hair is huuuuge! ..B..But..this one WILL help! I promise! *The multi-colored haired clown tosses the blanket aside, clasping her hands together, giving her roomate a pleading expression*
Synthy: ....*awful groaning noise* If you're...giving me..the look I think you are....I'm screwed...
Madison: *Indeed, Madison's current look is one of a heart broken, kicked puppy* Pweeeeeeeeeeeeease....
Synthy: ......Get..it over with.....
Madison: YAY! *She hops up and down in joy before clearing her throat, resting her hands behind her back* ..I need you to set up and close your eyes for me..
Synthy: I am sitting up.....and I haven't opened my eyes since two days ago.
Madison: ..I..I knew that! *Looking a little flustered, Madison turns away to retreive her cure* ..Now open wiiiide..and saaaaaay.."I'm'a super girl!" *A spoon full of..something..is soon shoved into Synthy's poor, sick mouth*
*Synthy is confused as to how the small Pixie-like Clown managed to get through her fortress of solitude as quickly as she did. The camera pans in...and Synthy's formerly pure white face turns an offbeat shade of..blue. She thickly swallows. Syn:...The ...fa...hell...
Madison: ....Mmmm! Nummy nummy! Isn't that gooood? Eat up for Nurse Madi, please! *Yanking the spoon out of her mouth before pouring some more..stuff..into it* ..Heeeeeeere comes the flaming air plane full of orphaaaaaaans!
Synthy: *Crawls beneath her covers.* *Her freakishly faraway-sounding voice speaks.* Syn: What......is.....that stuff?
Madison: I made it myself! ...It's chicken noodle soup! ...Well...sorta. 'Cept..it's..got gummy worms in it..aaaaand..pepperoni's...aaaand a little chocolate milk..a dash of pepper..and some stuff the guys in The Draugr told me to sprinkle in there to "let you speak to the unholy beast"
Synthy:.....*Gets bleeped out by the PTC* The ....freakin...DRAUGR?.... Waitasec...how'd...you....get..somethin'...from them?
Madison: Double duh! We're like....super buddies now! ..Potty mouth.. *She shrinks down a bit, letting her posture slump*
Synthy:...How....*groan*....come?
Madison: Common goals! 'Sides didn't ya hear that Volt-What-It's guy? He was all *voice drops lower, with an english accent* "I hate women! Brrrr! They are dumb!" ..So he was ASKIN for it!
Synthy:....Dude...Draugr.....Wha...the....*blankets shift and Synthy makes a hissing-esque noise.* Madi..Karma and you...gonna be good buddies ....now?
Madison: ...Ah...I dunno... *scratching the side of her head, ruffling up some hair, looking entirely confused* ..All she ever wants to do is..hurt stuff..an..that's all she talks about to..
Synthy:....*weak voice*...Close that sunlight up, will ya good chap? *her voice has taken on an odd Britinsh intonation, and she sounds half hysterical*
Madison: ....Uhhhm...ok...saaaaay... *Quirking a brow before she turns to close the drapes, turning the room back into it's near pitch dark state* ..Do ya happen to remember my name by any chance?
Synthy: Of course. You're....Skitz! Your name sounds psychotic, yes it do...yes your name sounds psychotic...how about you...*IS halfsinging it, and she coughs violently afterwards.* Madi.....son....sounds like...MadiSyn. .....Are you my...sister? *Still sounds bloody hysterical, and very very tired.*
Madison: *The Clown Girl simply gives her a blank stare, she's almost sound too crazy for even HER* ...U-Uh...sure! Yeah! An' big sissy says it's time beddy bye! Night night! Dream of...anything you can't stab me with! *Carefully easing her onto her back, she tucks Synthy back into bed, gently patting her forehead* ..Juuust get better an' I'll take care of the apartment, kay?
Synthy: Make.....Bubby do it....make sure...Lexi doesn't do drugs....make....sure.....you're...careful....*Her voice is drooping away, and she sounds oddly mellow and peaceful.*
Madi: W-Whatever ya say! *Frowning slightly before she slowly edges out of the room, until only her head is peeking in* ...g...get better real quick! *Slowly closing it, leaving the room in darknesss*
Synthy: ....Thank Calypso. *The covers turn and rustle, and one can see the Synthy-shape snuggling into comfort*
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Ratings
Dennis Stamp
Has a box of scraps
"YAY!"
Posts: 4,236
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Post by Ratings on Jun 28, 2007 7:18:47 GMT -5
Copacabana Beach, Rio De Janeiro, Brazil - Day
A magnificent shot of the world popular beach is shown along with it's inhabitants in the form of swimsuit/bikini wearing Brazilians and tourists. As the camera zooms out, Ratings is seen leaning his back against a palm tree. He is wearing dark tinted sunglasses, a short sleeve buttoned shirt wore unbuttoned that shows off his Johnny Nitro-esque abs, faded designer blue jeans and expensive sandals. While remaining in the shade, it comes relevant that he is speaking to someone on his cellphone.
Ratings: "I'll tell you, my friend, she's done at least one thing right. Bringing EWT to Brazil. The weather is fantastic. You need to come check this place out. The scenery is breathtaking."
He stops as a pair of Brazilian beauties walk by wearing the skimpiest bikinis imaginable. Pushing his sunglasses down to the tip of his nose, Ratings checks them out before resuming his conversation.
Ratings: "Both kinds of scenery."
He pauses as the person on the other line speaks back to him.
Ratings: "Whoa, whoa, whoa. You mean you actually are coming here... for the pay-per-view? What, he doesn't think I can handle this by myself?"
(pause)
Ratings: "Added insurance, he says? Well, it may be a good idea to have some "insurance" when the time comes."
(pause)
Ratings: (laughs) "Yeah, my thoughts exactly. Look, I gotta get going. Just tell him that I have everything under control and I'll probably see you at "Soundless Dawn". Alright, later."
Ratings hangs up and turns to face the camera, flashing his trademark smirk.
Ratings: "It appears that due to recent events that have shaken the industry of professional wrestling, EWT's At the Soundless Dawn has been delayed until the ninth of July. What does that mean, you ask? It means we--the EWT superstars--have more time to prepare for our upcoming battles. It means more time for us to enjoy the beauty that is Brazil. But most of all, it means that Spaz will have to wait a little longer to have his (sarcastic tone) touching, tear jerking, E-MO-TIONAL retirement party. Yes, it seems that it is time for this beloved EWT veteran to bid adieu to the company that made him famous, that made him rich, and most all, that made him a legend."
Ratings lets out a mock sigh.
Ratings: (cont.) "And who else to compete against him in his final confrontation than the man who defeated him at the biggest stage of them all. The man who stole the show. Naturally, I am talking about "The Palm Springs Playboy", "The 'It' Athlete", "The Greatest Sports Entertainer of Yesterday, Today & Tomorrow": yours truly, the one and only Ratings.”
He runs his hand through his straight platinum blonde hair.
Ratings: (cont.) “Spaz, you could have chosen anyone to fight you in your curtain call. You could’ve been Maelstrom, your former friend who took the EWT Heavyweight Championship from you after you held for over 5 months. It could have been JZ Badd Blood, your mentor; the man who showed you the ropes and no doubt helped to make you the EWT idol you are today. It could have been Spyke, Limey or “Big Daddy” Gasoline, your friends that together with you formed one of the most dominate factions in EWT history, Generation Tech. And the list continues: Principle Pain, Virus, Eddie Omega, Moxie, HMark, Joe One, Oceanic, even Billy “The Virgin” Ubermark would’ve no doubt accepted! And yet, you chose me. You chose me to be your last opponent in your EWT and wrestling career. And I know exactly why you selected me, Spaz? Because you needed to. Because you know damn well that you could not let the results of Crap-a-Mania be that last chapter in your storybook fairytale. You need that happy ending with the tears of joy and the cheering fans that had always believed in you. That is what you want, isn’t Spaz? Well, unfortunately, those only happen in fairytales. In reality, the belief that you could do anything if you try your hardest can only get you so far. For there will always be elitists such as myself who will stop you from surpassing expectations and remind where your place is: below high society. Spaz, at Crap-a-Mania, you fought me when you were at the top of your game and I still came out the victor. Here we are, almost two months later and now look at you. You are in pain, you are far from %100 and in light of the tragedies that have shocked the wrestling world, mentally, you are far from prepared. You are walking into this match a shell of the man I fought at Crap-a-Mania while I have only gotten stronger, faster and simply put, better than before.”
Ratings removes his sunglasses and looks at the camera with serious expression.
Ratings: “I’ll tell you what, nemesis. I’m going to do you a favor. I’m going to do you the greatest thing a wrestler can do for another. I’m going to end your career. I’m going to put an end to your obsession of leaving EWT with your head held high and the respect of the fans and your peers. And I want you to never forget that I was the one who ended your passion. When you get up in the morning and your shoulder feels like it had been crushed by landslide, I want you to think of me. When you need help to get something off the top shelf because you cannot raise your arm without being struck with pain, I want you to think of me. And when you turn on your television, flip it to EWT to relive those “good ol’ days” and you see the next great EWT World Heavyweight Champion, I want you to SEE… me. We are both men of destinies, Spaz. I’m just destined to achieve greater than you and anyone else like you. Come Soundless Dawn, Spaz, you will fall, your career will end… and the ratings… will… rise.”
He puts his sunglasses back on and gives the camera a final smirk before walking out of frame.
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Post by liontamer12 on Jun 28, 2007 15:47:06 GMT -5
*The camera cuts to the stage area as "I'm the King of My World" by Saliva echoes throughout the arena. John "The Lion" Valentine struts out from the curtain with a different look on his face...a look that hasn't been seen before. Mic in hand, he raises it to his lips and begins...*
Valentine: What a way to have my first match against an EWT superstar. What a way to say hello to an old..."friend." I think the idea of a no disqualification match is superb. It's another...opportunity.
*Valentine starts down the ramp as he's talking.*
Valentine: And while we're at it, I'd like to thank Oceanic for making the match possible. I don't even think she gave a Boston Crab's ass who was in the match against Virus and the fact that I was chosen feels like I am beginning to get noticed. That feels good...and hopefully, I pay some dues; Hopefully I earn some respect.
*John climbs up the steps and enters the ring. Standing in the middle he leers at the entryway.*
Valentine: But unfortunately, my opponent doesn't want to be in the match. I know exactly why...and I know exactly who...But Virus, I know you're a good guy. Gimme' my shot at something bigger than men with bad hygiene, cruiserweights and hippies. If not for you...for me. Hey, I respect you. I know you're a great wrestler. Give me the honor of stepping in the ring with you. Maybe I'll learn something. It'll be another step to respect.
*The camera cuts to the next segment.*
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