Raw Closed Captions (December 29th, 2008)

[Eli]

Dec 30, 2008 3:21:31 GMT -5 Alucard said:

God, how can someone mess up the CC THIS BADLY, it bottles the mind!

(yes, that's a Blades of Glory joke )

But still, had me laughing till my throat hurt.

LOL I made a Blades of Glory reference the other day, though I forgot where.

[Eli]

Dammit, will someone give Rey a tissue?

[Perpetual Nirvana]

Goldust appears on screen and says he is hot for Jeff Hardy.

Given that it was Goldust, that doesn't strike me as odd.

Sean Michaels is on the verge of spank up seed.

Again, given that Sean Michaels is a pornstar, that doesn't seem odd either.

[Long A, Short A]

These threads always make my face cheeks hurt from laughing. I didn't knock Shawn Michaels and Sharmell are the same person. Poor Booker, or maybe not.

[Confused Mark Wahlberg]

Behind Enemy Lines: Canada.

AHAHAHAHAHA

[Dragonfly]

Backstage, we see Legacy. Randy Orton says they can be bigger than the Four Doors Men, bigger than sex, and bigger than Eat Her Loofa. Orton says that this group doesn't tolerate loose fur. He turns to Cody and says "Cody, word up".

Bigger than SEX, the "sports-entertainment" stable led by Vince Russo in the early days of TNA? I think they have that one taken care of.

Rogue Roads will face CM Dunk, whose theme song apparently contains the lyrics "I am made of fail."

Awesome. That ranks right up there with "Twist of Fail" and "Stock Market Bill."

[Shy Guy]

i would love to see a list of all the entrance themes CC's.

[Mantaurded]

Very good, nice job man

[Trout Stratus]

DAMN!