Caption this: Raw 8/07/05

[Phoenix]

knutmeg1 said:

"Anything you can do, we can do better...
We can do anything better than you!"


"No you can't..."


"Yes we can..."


"No you can't..."


"Yes we can!"

genius pure genius

[Lancers]

9.
When Eugene confessed that he thought the Katie Vick storyline wasn't that bad, Kurt Angle knew that Eugene wasn't playing a gimmick after all.

10.
It was Chris Masters' job to help up Shelton Benjamin after Shelton was informed that he's supposed to lose this match.

11.
Looks like more people have seen that Matt Hardy/Chyna sex tape.
see my previous captions to understand this caption, it's on the last post of the first page

12.
Bischoff can't believe his ears when a random fan in the audience started screaming "You Screwed Earl". Being that it wasn't Earl in the boston crab, or the fact that Bischoff didn't actually fire the man.

13.
Matt Hardy learned a valuable lesson this evening. Don't steal Edge's veggie burritos.

14.
"I know you farted. I heard it. Then I smelled it. Don't pin this on Jerry."

15.
Shawn and Hulk love intimidating Beavis and Butt-Head to a live audience even if they never heard of Beavis and Butt-Head.

16.
When it came to building a wrestling ring around a moat filled with alligators, Victoria knew instantly that it wasn't one of the company's better ideas.

17.
Viscera needed just a little assistance after he was bragging about how he can do the spin-a-rooni.

18.
John Cena's allergies are really bad this time of year.

[Marksus]

jmoney said:

wwe strangely put up some more waaay after the first batch.

9.
Kurt "Why have you got so much hair and i have none!"
10.
Masters helps Shelton limber up for his Hogan posedown routine
11.
Jericho "OOOOHH look at the size of that Wasp!"
bischoff "I'll get it"
12.
Bischcoff "I'm a real american..."
13.
Edge "i refuse to look at the damn trousers for a minute longer"
Matt " iknow they're years old but they're comfy"
14.
You better not do any more impressions of me
15.
Hogan doesn't like HBK's Ultimate Warrior impression either
16.
Victoria finds out Rosey has the bad sort of super breath.
17.
Conway "Sorry but you seem to be more of the ugly sister than Cinderellla?"
Vis "I shall go to the ball"
18.
Carlito trys to teach Cena the ways of the ninja.
Cena just wants someone to blow on his tummy

[Limey]

Phase #1.



Edge: See, it's easy, you just have to laugh like this; "HA HA HA HA HA."
Lita: Uh..OK..."HA HA HA HA HA."
Both: "HA HA HA HA HA."
(FFX)



As punishment for being whiny, Matt is forced to watch the entirity of Wrestlemania IX.

Matt: BUT HOGAN WASN'T EVEN SUPPOSED TO BE IN THE MAIN EVENT!!!



Hogan: Hello, Eugene. Knowledged as you are in the wrestling universe, I assume you know who I am.

Eugene: (Gasp) Xanta Claus?



Two "wisemen" attempting to solve the riddle; "What is the sound of crap happening?"



Angle: KHAAAAAAAAAAAAN!!!!!



It's "Point to the egomaniac who should just STOP WRESTLING" day!



Observe the dangers of insane air guitar, kids. Someone might get hurt.



Remember, IWC, only YOU can prevent egotism from taking over wrestling!

(I know, it's mysig. So sue me.)

[Limey]

Phase #2.



Kurt: (squinting) Hu..Hulka...Hulkratron?

Eugene: Don't ask me, I don't know what it says either.



Marsters: You are DOING the YMCA, and you are DOING it right now! Now come on!! Y.....



Bischoff: I will set my microphone from "stun" to "kill"

Jericho: You idiot, you're a GM! Use your Karate Chop Action!

(Presses a button on Bischoff's back, Bischoff chops Patton.)



Bisch: "Wrestlecrap"? What the hell?



Edge: I WANNA TOUCH HIS SHOULDER!!!

Blonde ref: YEAH, ME TOO!

Ref: No, it's MY turn! Wait your turn!!!



Hogan: OooooOoooOooh! Nooooose!

Shawn: I can't believe I'm supposed to job to you...



Confusing Hogan's fist for a gun, Shawn immediately attempts to dodge it, Matrix style.



Rosey: Oooh, so you want a push, do you? Well, I'll show you a push! HERE'S YOUR PUSH! (Shove)

Vicky: Wow! A push!



Viscera: Why are you taking my shoe?

Conway: It's for Snitsky, my love sla...um...just friend!



Ladies and gentlemen, the Carlitocopter.

Cena: FREAK! GET AWAY FROM ME!!!

[Deus Ex Machina]

1.
Edge and Lita react to last weeks show.
2.
JBL's goons showed up on RAW to carry Matt off to the showers. Now that he's been rehired JBL claims he is technically a noob and must "pay his dues".
3.
Eugene: "I thought you only held people down, not helped them up?"
4.
It would seem Hogan's ear infection was infectious.
5.
Angle sees Hogan team up with Eugene and is unhappy with having to carry Hogan again. "I already did that in 2002, man..."
6.
HBK: "Pull my finger and I'll smell like how you are in the ring"
7.
With the years Shawn's aim had gotten a little off.
8.
"Now on the TitanTron: Hogan Knows Best!"
9.
Angle: "Do you just let one go?"
10.
Chris Masters misunderstands the concept of carrying someone.
11.
"I'm Eric Bischoff, B****!"
12.
Bisch: "Sorry, Chris. I still can't hear you are over. It's the cruiserweights for you, buddy."
13.
Ref 1: "I got his wallet."
Ref 2: "Does he still have pics of Lita in it?"
14.
Hogan "Get ready for the fingerpoke of DOOM!"
15.
It's a battle for Shawn's hair.
16.
Even Victoria can't look at Rosey. And she gets paid to.
17.
Rob Conway wonders if the Viscera's stink comes from his feet or from his ring work.
18.
Carlito calls a time out when he sees Cena is about to get naked.

[Phoenix]

number 10 is great Deus

[superwarriortaker]

1.
Even Lita is sorry that she took her shoes off in public
2.
Matt has no idea that this stopped being a shoot months ago
3.
Hogan: Come with me Brother, er, little one, as I am going on an adventurous journey back to Never Put Over Land
4.
Hogan, caters to the crowd but--sensing betrayal yet again--watches Eugene out of the corner of his eye...
5.
Damn you Vince!!! Batista vs Me for the Smackdown title would have kicked ass!!! Damn YOU!!!
6.

HBK: Admit it Hogan, you're using the podium to stand yourself up with, aren't you?
7.
HBK channels Andy Kaufman for just a brief moment--and all is right in the Universe.
8.
[/quote]
Hey, you in the back row...yeah, you, sweet thing--how would you like to find out what I like for breakfast, Blondie, what do you say after the show we......um....I...er....uh........whoops sorry Brooke.

[superwarriortaker]

9.
Angle: Dammit Eugene, for the LAST time I'm not Kerwin White....not yet at least.
10.

Getting as close to touching the midcard as he will ever get, Masters hangs on for dear life..
11.

In a true type of metaphor, Bischoff slaps the taste of disrespect out of Patton's mouth, much like the WWE has slapped the taste of watchable sports entertainment out of our own mouths
12.
Funny, with a Main Event PPV push like his, shouldn't Y2J be on HIS knees?
13.

Why the referees even attempt to restrain the wrestlers is beyond me, as Matt and Edge obviously have an unbridled "passion" for one another.
14.
Hogan Knows Best does NOT suck, Brotherrr
15.
HBK faints as a result of ten Syracuse thugs having assaulted him backstage prior to this segment-- or simply to avoid having to put over Hogan at the next PPV, or in televised interviews, or in print, et cetera......
16.

Victoria longed for the days when she did not have to be seen in the same ring as gimmicky wrestlers, days when Steven Richards would break in her high heels for her....
17.
The only difference between Vis and the Con-Man is that when Con mounts some guy, it's not for a cheap pop from the crowd
18.

Cena puts Carlito over for the first of what should be many times--and I hope Vince is reading this.

[Shiori C: WC Blue Moon Poster]

9.

Eugene wasn't fooled by the Stone Cold lookalike

10.

Chris loved the new raggy doll, but he'd have to wait until Christmas to get it

11.

Patton and Jericho were enjoying starring in the porno, until mid-BJ, Jericho suddenly got lock-jaw. As director, Bischoff wasn't best pleased with either of his stars.

12.

It may be mid-match, but there's always time to impersonate Hulk Hogan

13.

The square dance was farcical

14.

Cousin It was certainly enjoying his first WWE program

15.

The "Who Will Have A Heart Attack First" betting syndicate were very interested during this scene

16.

In WWE's continuing love of the 1980s, they decided to rehire and repackage the Stay-Puft Marshmallow Man

17.

Doc Martens aren't easy to remove

18.

Carlito crept along the bottom of the glass ceiling Spiderman-style to attack Cena, while the WWE Champ was distracted by HHH, who was stood atop the glass ceiling making the "jerk-off" sign at him.

[Bram wants to 'urt you]

Hogan demonstrates the amazing array of high flying moves he used to take the belt off of Nash back in WCW.

[sirendemented]

Edge and Lita's reaction to the title of Lita's second book "Condoms: A R.O.A.D NOT Traveled"

[sirendemented]

Matt's reaction to the title of his second book "Psychotic Internet Rants for Dummies"

[Deleted]

9.
"What do you mean you traded my Olympic Gold Medal for that shirt? ShopZone will throw in a Matt Hardy pendant!"

13.
After shaking hands with Bret Hart, Vince finally shows us how Survivor Series 1997 was supposed to end.
14.
"You can stick it, brother! Tye-dye is always in season!"
15.
The first-ever airing of the "Dentures On A Pole" match.
16.
WWE decides to try a new way to draw fans: Instead of throwing T-shirts, they start launching random Divas.
17.
"I'll show you a good way to fix that Charley horse."
18.
"Aa-a-ah! This shirt is giving me a rash!"

[scbg]

18.

Carlito Man, Carlito Man
Does whatever Carlito can

[taz0285]

For the last time carlito you have your tibo tape in upside down...

[Bobafett]

wowitsme said:

The Make-A-Wish foundation grants Eugene a visit from Hogan

COMING NEXT WEEK = Hogan comes on Raw and sings a song about Eugene, but strangely never mentions Eugene by name