Alright, here's the beginning of the show, to hold everyone over while I finish the main event.
Monday NiteRaw November 8th, 2010
Hoss - Welcome to Monday NiteRaw!
[glow=orange,2,300]The Boiler Room[/glow]
BRB: Welcome, WWCF Galaxy! It's me, BRB, and I'm back with a brand new, extra special edition of The Boiler Room! Behind me sits a very special guest...
Boiler Room Brawler moves aside, revealing a man in a suit with a burlap sack over his head who sits tied to a chair. BRB removes the burlap sack, revealing...
BRB: Welcome to The Boiler Room, Uncle Seth!
Seth Drakin: Brawler! What is the meaning of this?
BRB: You screwed me, Drakin! It's November, but the last thing I remember was Wheel of Misfortune! You have much to answer to...
Seth Drakin scowls.
Seth Drakin: Like what?
BRB: Like this!
Brawler turns Drakin around towards the wall.
BRB: See anything missing?
Seth Drakin: Nope, just your pipe wrench-
BRB: I know about my big, massive, pipe wrench! Your nose proves it.
Seth Drakin: You'd better release me or so help me-
BRB: So help you nothing, Drakin! You rejected me and my teammates when you took over as CEO. You did nothing about the Man in Black as he tormented me-
Seth Drakin: Get over it, Brawler! I have a company to run!
BRB backhand chops Drakin in the face.
BRB: What happened after the match, Drakin? What happened after I was fried?
Seth Drakin: Whitey Fats returned and delivered a Burning Hammer to the Man in Black.
BRB's face freezes, his eyes twitching
BRB: Whitey? Whitey? Whitey?
Seth Drakin: He became rich since last time, and he fooled you into believing you were his employee - he even bought your Interforum Championship shot from you, and you helped him win it at Gookermania!
BRB furrows his brow, clenches his teeth. He scrunches his nose.
Seth Drakin: And you amazed me the whole time, Brawler. You forgot how to wrestle and yet, you had the most bizarre hot streak I ever saw. Only Metal defeated you for your Hardcore Championship shot.
BRB grabs his pipe wrench, swings it overhead, and completely wrecks a steel chair in one swing. Seth Drakin retains his composure and continues after Brawler relatively calms down.
BRB: Did I lose weight?
Seth Drakin: Your damn right you did, and speaking of which, it was a boon as you took Damn Right Jackson to the limit with your newfound skills at Night of the Wrestling Zombies. You got a WWCF Championship shot, what more do you want?
BRB: I want another one! I had amnesia; why in the world would you book me for a match that I couldn't possibly wrestle? Are you deranged?
Seth Drakin: Speak for yourself. I didn't know the true extent of your amnesia till it was too late.I began to doubt myself in booking you for Night of the Wrestling Zombies against the champion, but Jazzman took you under his wing and taught you how to really wrestle.
BRB: [size=1How to really wrestle? Surely you can't be serious.
[/size][/b][/color]
Seth Drakin: I am serious, and don't call me Shirley. Or Uncle Seth for that matter.BRB: I won't stand for this! I demand a rematch, or else heads will roll when I swing my big, massive, pipe wrench straight into their skulls!BRB points his finger at Seth Drakin, the ropes explode, and Drakin subsequently gets out of the chair. He adjusts himself, gives BRB a stern look, and gets a vicious scowl in return.Seth Drakin: Best watch yourself, Brawler. I've squashed bugs higher up the totem pole than you; you could be next.BRB: You rejected me and the rest of Corporate, this has been a year in the making. Now get out of here...Drakin leaves the boiler room, then BRB returns to the camera.BRB: Thanks for watching, WWCF Galaxy, for watching the triumphant return of The Boiler Room, where all the hottest stars and angles only get hotter! I'll see you all later...TIM HOSS: Up next, fans, we've got one half of the WWCF Tag Team Champions taking on half of the team that will challenge them for the titles at In Your Apartment, as Johnny Stone takes on Jazzman! Any predictions, King?JESSE KING (flips a coin, fails to catch it): Damn, where did that thing go? Oh well, I'd say it's about 50/50 in either wrestler's favor.TIM HOSS: But if it's 50/50, then it's not in anybody's favor.JESSE KING: Shh, Muffer's talking.MICHAEL MUFFER: The following contest is scheduled for one fall with a twenty minute time limit!*"Hurricane Season" by Trombone Shorty*
MICHAEL MUFFER: Introducing first, from upstate New York and weighing in at 236 lbs...Jazzman!*Jazzman heads down to the ring and slides in under the bottom rope, before getting to his feet and climbing to the second rope. He points out at the crowd and then hops down, taking off his coat to hand to the ref and then exiting the ring, where he gives his fedora to a kid in the front row*
MICHAEL MUFFER: And his opponent!*"Hair of the Dog" by Nazareth*
MICHAEL MUFFER: He is one half of the WWCF Tag Team Champions! From Milwaukee, WI, via Yellow Knife, North-Western Territories, Canada, and weighing in at 237 lbs..."Jumbo" Johnny Stone!*Stone strides out with his championship belt slung over his shoulder. He confidently walks down to the ring and climbs through the ropes, hands his belt to the ref, and the bell sounds*
Jazzman vs. Johnny StoneTIM HOSS: Despite only a single pound in weight difference, Stone and Jazzman wrestle very different styles, with Stone gravitating more toward brawling and power moves while Jazzman's quicker and more of a technician.*The two men circle one another, looking for an opening. Jazzman gets Stone in a flying armbar, but Stone happens to be close enough to the ropes to reach out and get the break before any real damage is done. The two men stand up and Stone fires a quick right hand at Jazzman's head, but Jazzman's able to turn in time to take the punch in his shoulder instead. The blows causes him to wince.*
JESSE KING: That couldn't have felt good, but if you've gotta take a punch then it's much better to take it in the shoulder than on the jaw!TIM HOSS: Sometimes you actually say something that I agree with, Jesse, and this is one of those times.*Jazzman throws a kick at Stone, who dodges. Jazzman tries again, and Stone dodges again. Jazzman tries a third time and Stone charges in and grabs the leg right at the hip, too close in for Jazzman to try for an enzuigiri! Stone headbutts Jazzman full in the face, knocking him down. Cover by Stone*
One!
Two!
Kickout!
*Both men get up, Jazzman a bit slower to his feet. Stone goes to lock on the Cobra Clutch, but Jazzman's able to avoid the hold while simultaneously getting a good grip on one of Stone's arms; he gives a firm yank and throws Stone over his shoulder. As Stone rises, Jazzman catches him with a Yakuza kick that sends him sprawling into the corner.*
TIM HOSS: We're still in the early stages and already we've seen these two counter each other's attacks. Looks like they both have each other well scouted.*Jazzman hits Stone with several stiff chops in the corner, eliciting a "WOOOO!" from the crowd with each one. As Jazzman goes for another, though, Stone seems to get a surge of adrenaline and comes charging out of the corner with a big running headbutt that sends Jazzman down to the mat.*
JESSE KING: Ouch! That can't feel good, unless you're some kind of ultra-masochist, and maybe not even then!*Stone leans on the ropes, rubbing his chest where Jazzman was working it over. He advances on Jazzman, who has begun to rise. Stone picks him up and drills him with a DDT, before covering*
One!
Two!
Kickout!
TIM HOSS: Good try by Stone, but he'll need to do more than that to put away Jazzman.*Stone positions Jazzman's head between his legs as if for a powerbomb. He brings him up on his shoulders and then falls backward, intending to drive Jazzman to the mat facefirst...but Jazzman is able to land on his feet!*
TIM HOSS: Amazing agility shown by Jazzman!JESSE KING: You said it, Gorilla! I was sure that was going to be a case of "face meets hard surface" there!*Before Stone can get up, Jazzman nails him in the head with a stiff kick, spinning him around. Jazzman wraps his arms around Stone's waist and takes him over with a German suplex! Jazzman continues to hold onto Stone as he brings him up and hits him with another German! Stone takes a third German from Jazzman before Jazzman decides to go for the pin with Stone's shoulder's down*
One!
Two!
Kickout!
TIM HOSS: Only a near-fall, but nevertheless, those rolling German suplexes are nothing to take lightly! If Stone wants to have any hope of beating Jazzman, he needs to get back on offense.*Jazzman applies a single leg Boston crab on Stone. Stone looks to be in tremendous pain but finally manages to pull himself to the ropes. Jazzman breaks the hold and brings Stone back into the center of the ring with a double underhook suplex! Cover by Jazzman*
One!
Two!
Kickout!
*Jazzman goes to lock on Mercy Mercy Mercy, but Stone's able to get to his knees and blast Jazzman in the face with a hard right hand before he can do it! Jazzman staggers away as Stone tries to stand, but is having difficulty after being in the crab for an extended period of time. Jazzman recovers in time to go on the attack again, going for a running neckbreaker--but Stone catches him in midair and slams him down! With Jazzman seeming to have the wind momentarily knocked out of him, Stone rolls away and tries to take some time to catch his breath.*
JESSE KING: Wow, how did Stone do that?!TIM HOSS: He's a very tough competitor, King.*Stone is finally back up and whips the rising Jazzman into the ropes. Jazzman, however, is able to flip himself into a handstand, bounce his legs off the ropes, and fly back at Stone with a handspring enzuigiri--but Stone ducks as if he knew it was coming!*
JESSE KING: Wha--he ducked that?!!?TIM HOSS: You're right to be surprised, since we don't see a lot of Jazzman's opponents avoid falling victim to the handspring enzuigiri when he breaks it out. It shows that Stone's done his homework, Jesse, as I was saying earlier.*As Jazzman lands, Stone applies a full nelson, gets a running start, and then lifts him up and drives his face into the mat! Stone follows it up by lifting Jazzman and bringing him down onto his knee for a Manhattan drop! Jazzman crumples to the canvas, and Stone heads to the top rope.*
TIM HOSS: Stone going high risk, which isn't something we see from him a lot. Has he done enough damage to Jazzman or will we see the momentum shift again?JESSE KING: I'm going to guess that he'll screw up here just because his taste in tag team partners proves that he's got terribly bad judgment!TIM HOSS: Stop it.*Stone gets ready to go for the elbow drop...leaps off...and connects! Cover*
One!
Two!
Kickout!
*Stone rises, and begins to lift Jazzman up for a Gorilla press slam--but Jazzman is able to get free of his grip and fall to the mat behind him, landing on his feet! Before Stone can turn around to face him, Jazzman picks him up and throws him down with a reverse bodyslam! Jazzman rolls away. Jazzman is grimacing in pain, clearly having had a lot taken out of him after all the damage done by Stone. The ref begins the ten count.*
TIM HOSS: Incredible! Jazzman showing that there's still life in him. After taking a beating like that I can understand why he isn't jumping right back into action, but he can't wait too long or Stone will be all over him again.JESSE KING: You feel lucky today, Gorilla? I'll give you another chance to make some easy money by betting you that one of these two men is going to be up before the count of ten.TIM HOSS: Obviously, I pass.JESSE KING: But don't you see? The last time I offered to make this bet, somebody got up! So that means that the likelihood of somebody NOT getting up has increased! The odds are better for you!TIM HOSS: By that logic, every day that there isn't a snowstorm in Venezuela means that the odds of there being one the next day go up, and we all know that's not going to happen.JESSE KING: Do we, Gorilla? Do we REALLY???*Both men are up at five. Stone goes to put Jazzman away with the Rock Crusher, but Jazzman is able to duck and get a hammerlock on Stone, using his leverage along with Stone's own momentum to ram him into the turnbuckles!*
TIM HOSS: Nice counter there by Jazzman!*Jazzman turns Stone around and attempts to hit Takin' The A Train, but Stone has enough presence of mind to grab the ropes and stop it. Jazzman turns around and gets kicked in the stomach, doubling him over. Stone goes for a powerbomb--but Jazzman counters that into a triangle choke! Stone gasps and cries out from the pain*
JESSE KING: I wouldn't want to be Johnny Stone right now! Think he'll tap?*The ref asks Stone that very question and Stone, although obviously in great pain, shakes his head. Stone gets a grip on Jazzman...*
TIM HOSS: Oh my God, is he going to do what I think he is?*...Stone lifts Jazzman off the mat while still in the chokehold...gets him high up...and slams him down hard! Jazzman has the wind knocked out of him and is forced to release the hold. Stone collapses. Both men are down and the ref starts counting*
JESSE KING: Wow!TIM HOSS: Unbelievable strength shown by Johnny Stone, as even in that chokehold he was able to lift his opponent and slam him! But it's clear that Jazzman's worn him down a lot, and Jazzman seems to be getting up now.*Jazzman is on one knee now, with Stone still down. Jazzman to his feet as Stone finally begins to rise. Jazzman is over to Stone and hits Takin' The A Train on his opponent, drilling him into the mat headfirst! Cover*
One!
Two!
Three!
MICHAEL MUFFER: Here is your winner...Jazzman!TIM HOSS: Jazzman may not have been able to put his opponent away with the triangle choke, but he was still successful in softening Stone up to the point where he was vulnerable to Takin' The A Train! An impressive victory against an equally impressive opponent in Johnny Stone!JESSE KING: Think we'll see the same thing at In Your Apartment?TIM HOSS: I have no idea, King, but this victory has to give Pride and Story confidence in the days leading up to that event.The Sam V. LionhartMICHAEL MUFFER: The following contest is scheduled for one fall with a fifteen minute time limit!*Chris Jericho's "Lionheart" theme plays*
MICHAEL MUFFER: Introducing first, from Calgary, Alberta, Canada and weighing in at 210 lbs...Lionhart!*Lionhart runs down the ramp part of the way and leans back into a group of fans. He high fives them, then runs the rest of the way down and backflips into the ring*
MICHAEL MUFFER: And his opponent! From The Samville, USA, weighing in at...uh...just a moment...*Muffer looks at the card, frowns, leans over the ropes to ask somebody outside a question. The guy he's talking to shrugs helplessly. Muffer backs away, returns to his original position in the center of the ring, and hesitantly raises his microphone to his face, looking as if he feels silly.*
"Um...THE SAM, everybody!"*"Why Can't We Be Friends?" by War plays as The Sam jogs out at the top of the ramp, wearing a black singlet and football helmet.*
TIM HOSS: This match should be...interesting...*The Sam gets up on the apron and waves to everybody before climbing through the ropes. The ref confronts The Sam*
REF: Hey, you can't wear that helmet for a match like this!
THE SAM: It's not a helmet! It's a mask! You let other guys like Super Masked Hero X wear masks! It's freedom of expression! If you deny me my right to wear a mask as a method of expressing myself, you, sir, are a FASCIST!REF: I am not! And that is not a mask!
THE SAM: Sure it is. Look at this part.*The Sam tugs on the helmet's facemask*
THE SAM: That is known as a faceMASK. I am wearing a mask. It's not my fault that it has a helmet attached to it.REF (rolls eyes): Yeah, well, the helmet part has got to go.
THE SAM: Do you know how to separate them? I don't! I thought about studying that in college, but decided to become an English major instead. Besides, Storm Maestro wore a helmet.REF: That was a mask.
THE SAM: No, it was a helmet. Stop calling helmets masks when they are blatantly helmets. That's just being dishonest.REF:
Argh, they don't pay me enough for this, and this is my last day anyway...FINE! WEAR THE STUPID THING!
THE SAM: Woot!*The bell rings, and the match is underway*
The Sam vs. LionhartJESSE KING: The Sam should put this kid away pretty quick.TIM HOSS: Are you out of your mind, King? The Sam might be a good talker, but that's not what wins matches. Lionhart's an actual wrestler, so my money's on him.*Lionhart locks up with The Sam, and The Sam immediately backs away and grabs the ropes*
THE SAM: Ref! Illegal facemask pull! Penalize him!REF: Two things. First, he didn't touch your facemask. Second, wrong sport. Now get back in there and wrestle.
*The Sam warily advances on Lionhart, who punches him in the stomach. The Sam doubles over. Lionhart rolls The Sam up*
One!
Two!
Kickout!
TIM HOSS: Huh, The Sam seems to at least be able to know how to avoid getting pinned after being hit with one punch. Good for him.*Lionhart pulls The Sam up and whips him into the corner, but The Sam trips and falls before he's anywhere near the turnbuckles. Lionhart sighs, walks up to The Sam, and picks him up for a belly to back suplex! Cover by Lionhart*
One!
Two!
Kickout!
TIM HOSS: Wow. I'm honestly surprised that he was able to kick out again, King. The Sam's expired driver's license lists him as just 150 lbs.JESSE KING: Expired being the key word there! I'm sure that The Sam has been working out and taking lessons from Little Naitch and Tyfo.TIM HOSS: Even if you're right, though, he's still much less experienced than Lionhart.*Lionhart goes for an Asai moonsault, but as he runs to the ropes he suddenly sees Tyfo on the ring apron in his path!*
TIM HOSS: What the--?! Where did Tyfo come from?!JESSE KING: He must have been under the ring, Gorilla!*Lionhart puts on the brakes before he crashes into Tyfo, and the two men start to argue. The Sam, meanwhile, is beginning to get to his feet. Lionhart finally gets fed up and knocks Tyfo off the ring apron with a big forearm shot--but a second later, The Sam runs up behind him and chop blocks him! Lionhart falls to the mat and clutches his knee in pain*
TIM HOSS: What a dirty trick by The Sam.JESSE KING: Not dirty enough to get DQ'd though! And remember, he'll be facing Dave Von Halen for the InterForum Championship in a street fight! There's no such thing as fighting too dirty in one of those!*The Sam frantically stomps on the downed Lionhart before the bigger man can recover, and finishes it off by jumping and landing on Lionhart's chest with a double stomp. This last bit of footwork seems to take a toll on Lionhart, and The Sam covers*
One!
Kickout!
*The Sam gets up and raises both hands in the air, cheering*
THE SAM: Whoo!TIM HOSS: Why is he so happy?! It was just a one!JESSE KING: Sometimes there's no point in trying to figure out The Sam.*The Sam turns around and falls headfirst onto Lionhart's knee, hitting it with the helmet! Lionhart lets out a pained cry at the impact*
TIM HOSS: Dammit, The Sam might as well be hitting Lionhart with a baseball bat!JESSE KING: Wrong sport, Gorilla.*The Sam stomps on Lionhart some more and then makes another cover*
One!
Kickout!
*Before The Sam can get up, Lionhart grabs him and pitches him through the ropes to the floor! Lionhart struggles to stand as the ref begins the count on The Sam*
TIM HOSS: Good idea by Lionhart there, buying himself some time to get back to a vertical base.*Tyfo is helping The Sam up outside the ring and giving him advice. The Sam, clutching his midsection, listens and nods. The Sam gets up on the apron, climbs through the ropes...and gets superkicked by Lionhart! The Sam hits the mat, and Lionhart drops to one knee as the leg that The Sam went to work on gives out. Lionhart gets up and limps over to The Sam...who springs up and thumbs him in the eye! Lionhart spins away clutching his face*
TIM HOSS: That helmet probably mitigated the effects of Lionhart's superkick.*The Sam runs up behind Lionhart and hits him with a double axe handle to the back! Lionhart groans but doesn't go down, so The Sam does it a second time. This sends Lionhart to his knees, and The Sam punches him in the back of the neck repeatedly until he goes prone. The Sam turns him over and covers*
One!
Two!
Kickout!
JESSE KING: I like The Sam's style! He'll make a great InterForum champ!TIM HOSS: That's a little premature, don't you think?JESSE KING (indignant): HEY! I am NEVER premature, at ANYTHING!!! Has somebody been telling you things?! LIES, ALL OF IT! This is vile and vicious slander! Who is it?! I'll sue their asses!TIM HOSS: I mean that it's a little early to be assuming that The Sam will beat Dave Von Halen for the title.JESSE KING: Oh. Okay then.*The Sam starts hitting Lionhart with rights and lefts on the canvas until the ref tells him to stop. As The Sam turns to argue with the ref, Lionhart seems to get his second wind--he flips The Sam over and starts hitting him in the stomach with some closed fists of his own! The Sam groans and tries to get free, but can't!*
REF: Hey Lionhart, no closed fists! One, two, three, four--
*Lionhart stops punching and picks up The Sam for a bridging Northen Lights suplex! With The Sam's shoulders down, the ref counts*
One!
Two!
Kickout!
TIM HOSS: I've got to say, The Sam's a lot more durable than I thought he would be.*Lionhart pulls The Sam into the center of the ring and goes to lock on a Sharpshooter--but at that very moment, Tyfo enters the ring and pulls The Sam back over to the ropes!*
REF: Tyfo, what the hell are you doing?! Don't make me send you to the back!
*The Sam has gotten part of the way to his feet as the ref argues with Tyfo. Lionhart charges at The Sam and The Sam instinctively pulls the ref in front of him! The clothesline that Lionhart had intended for The Sam hits the ref instead, and he's down*
TIM HOSS: The Sam ought to be disqualified for that!JESSE KING: The ref kind of needs to be conscious to DQ somebody. Besides, Lionhart was the one who hit him!*With the ref down, Tyfo goes to work, chop blocking Lionhart's bad leg again! Lionhart hits the mat and both Tyfo and The Sam begin to stomp on him! As soon as Lionhart seems thoroughly out of it, the two of them drag him over to the corner, where Tyfo picks him up and climbs to the second rope--and hits him with the Tumbleweed!*
TIM HOSS: This is disgraceful!*As Tyfo makes a hasty exit through the ropes, The Sam revives the ref and drags him over to the corner. The Sam covers and the ref counts...*
One!
Two!
Three!
MICHAEL MUFFER: Here is your winner...The Sam!*The Sam is jumping up and down in jubilation, and invites Tyfo into the ring. Tyfo congratulates his manager, raises his hand, and points at him.*
TYFO: Here's your next IF Champion!TIM HOSS: Well, The Sam did it. He didn't do it fairly, but he did it.JESSE KING: Didn't your parents ever tell you that life isn't fair, Gorilla? I have a feeling that we're seeing the start of a Goldberg-esque winning streak from The Sam. Look out, D.R. Jackson, he'll be coming for YOU soon!TIM HOSS: ....JESSE KING: What is it? Why are you staring at me like that?TIM HOSS (exasperatedly): We'll be right back.*Girlfriend*
MM -
Ladies and Gentlemen, please welcome Sara Nakatomi.TH -
Tonight Sara is going to interview her own father, Hideo Nakatomi, who happens to be a major figure in the Nintendo corporation, WWCF's chief sponsor.JK -
But where the heck is she?Sara's entrance music continues, but there is no sign of her, a production assistant runs down the ramp and hands Muffer a message.
MM -
Folks, it appears that Sara Nakatomi in not in the building, therefore Nakatomi Plaza will not take place this evening.TH -
This is a bit unsettling.JK -
C'mon, Hoss, you know how flighty that girl is, she probably just forgot.Hardcore Contenders battle royalHoss -
Well, up next is the battle royal to determine the number one contender to the Hardcore title, Jess.King -
Yeah Gorilla, and I’m looking forward to this one! Since Metal won the title at Night of the Wrestling Zombies, there hasn’t been a clear cut challenger for the belt! This is gonna be very interesting, Hoss!Rise of Thunder plays as Metal makes his way to the ring.
Hoss -
And it looks like the Hardcore Champion wants an up close look at the action, Jess!King -
Well, he is the Champ, Gorilla! He wants to scout the competition for In Your Apartment!Muffer -
The following is the battle royal to decide the number one contender for the WWCF Hardcore Championship! It is to be contested under hardcore rules!The camera shows the various weapons strewn around the ring and ringside area.
*Ballad of a Hangman*
Muffer -
Introducing first, The Hangman!*Welcome to Hell*
Muffer -
Blackout!*King Kong 2004*
Muffer -
The General of the Monkey Army!*Save You*
Muffer -
Shannon Gay!*Classy Southern Music*
Muffer -
Whitey Fats!*Fatal KO*
Muffer -
And Super Masked Hero X!With all six men in the ring, the opening bell sounds!
The General pairs off with Hero X, while Hangman singles out Shannon Gay and Blackout targets Whitey. All six men slug it out in the center of the ring, then they all stop.
Hoss -
What’s going on?They all turn and look right at Metal, then they each grab a weapon and resume their battle! Metal grins and nods in approval.
Blackout swings a tennis racket at Whitey, but Hangman clobbers his former partner with a VHS player! Hangman taunts Blackout, before The General cracks him in the back of the skull with the butt of a toy rifle! Whitey comes up behind The General and back suplex’s him on the VHS player! Shannon Gay and Super Masked Hero X pick up where they left off last week. Gay picks up a wooden sword and blasts X in the kneecap!
King -
What the hell, Gorilla?! I’ve never seen such insane weapons used in a match before!Hoss -
Well, the men who compete in the hardcore division aren’t exactly known for their sanity, Jess!Gay and Whitey square off, Gay armed with the wooden sword, Whitey armed with a ballpoint pen. Gay swings at the legs, Whitey jumps over the sword and plunges the pen into Gay’s forehead!
Hoss -
OH MY GOD!!! SHANNON GAY IS GUSHING BLOOD!!!King -
OH THE HUMANITY!!!Whitey stands over Gay and cackles evilly! He picks up Gay and drags him towards the ropes, but The General zaps him with a taser, causing Whitey to collapse to the mat! The General zaps him again, but nothing happens!
Hoss -
Tough break for The General! He forgot to charge overnight!Hangman charges with his chainsaw, but The General ducks the shot and clothesline’s Hangman over the top rope!
Muffer -
The Hangman has been eliminated!Blackout nails the General from behind with a steering wheel! The General goes down and Blackout nails him again! He sees Whitey still convulsing on the mat and nails him with the steering wheel as well! He the pulls Whitey up and unceremoniously dumps him to the floor!
Muffer -
Whitey Fats has been eliminated!Blackout stomps the General, as EMTs run down to check on both Whitey and Gay. Hero X gets to his feet, looking enraged! He grabs a milk crate and nails Blackout in the head with it, then places the crate over his head! He poses heroically, then punts Blackout square in the head! The force of the blow drives Blackout into the ropes, but fails to eliminate him! Hero X charges, but Blackout falls forward, head butting X with the milk crate! Hero X staggers back, then falls forward, bumping into Blackout and knocking him over the top rope to the floor!
Muffer -
Blackout has been eliminated!Super Masked Hero X stands in the center of the ring and poses with his hands on his hips. He surveys the scene around him. Shannon Gay is still being tended to by the medics. The General is now sitting in the corner, fumbling with his taser. X first looks at Gay, then at The General.
Hoss -
Super Masked Hero X trying to decide which enemy to attack first, Jess!King -
If I were him, I’d get rid of Shannon Gay first. He’s practically done already as it is!Hero X looks at each opponent once more, then heads towards Gay! As he does, The General crawls out of the corner, his rifle cocked. He slowly sneaks up on X, but the hero senses it and spins around, grabs the rifle, and breaks it over his knee!
King -
Holy crap, Gorilla! That’s super speed for you!The General quickly rolls back, dodging a kick from Hero X! He pulls off his cap and throws it at X, who catches it, then rips the insignia off his chest and throws it at the General, nailing him in the face! The General falls back and X goes to push him over the top rope, but Shannon Gay low blows the Hero! X spins around, looking very
ANGRY!!!X punches Gay, knocking him across the ring! The General regains his footing and lunges a X, who evades the attack and drills The General with a DDT! He turns back towards Gay, who is aiming a grappling gun at him! Shannon fires, but X ducks as a giant plunger fires forth! X grabs the rope as the plunger sails across the arena and sticks to the wall at the other side of the arena! X holds onto to the rope, dangling above the floor! He taunts Gay, who just grins and drops the gun! X falls to the floor!
Muffer -
Super Masked Hero X has been eliminated!Gay, covered in blood, flips of Hero X, then turns to see The General getting to his feet, holding his neck.
Metal gets both men’s attention and holds up the Hardcore belt.
Hoss -
Here we go Jess! The final two! Will it be Shannon Gay or The General of the Monkey Army?! Who will face Metal for the Hardcore Championship at In Your Apartment?!The General and Gay charge each other, Gay ducks under a lariat and nails The General with a neck breaker! He pulls a bottle of root beer out of his tights and smashes it over The General’s head! The bottle breaks and root beer splashes everywhere!
King -
This is the damnedest hardcore match I’ve ever seen!Gay nails the dazed General with a series of punches, then an inverted atomic drop! The General staggers back towards the ropes, Gay charges, but The General back body drops him over the top! Gay lands on the apron!
Hoss -
Shannon Gay hanging on for dear life!Gay punches The General back, but feels someone tugging on his leg! He turns to see Masked Hero X trying to pull him down! Gay kicks X in the head, but The General blasts him with the VHS player, knocking to the floor!
Muffer -
The winner of this match and number one contender to the WWCF Hardcore Championship, The General of the Monkey Army!The General raises his arms in celebration as Bingo scurries to the ring to join him.
Hoss -
In all my years Jess, I’ve never seen anything like that!King -
No kidding Gorilla! The General has earned this victory tonight!Metal enters the ring and offers his hand to The General. The General takes it, then pulls Metal in for a staredown!
Hoss -
But will he be victorious over Metal at In Your Apartment? Will The General be the next Hardcore Champion? And what of Shannon Gay and Super Masked Hero X? This can’t possibly be over between them now! Little Naitch V. Dave Von HalenMuffer -
The following contest is set for one fall, with a fifteen minute time limit!*New Blackjacks theme*
Muffer -
Introducing first, from Las Vegas, Nevada, weighing in at 235 pounds, Little Naitch!Hoss -
Naitch flying solo tonight, as his manager The Sam is still resting up after his match with Lionhart earlier tonight!*Saints of Los Angeles*
Muffer -
And his opponent, accompanied by Alexa Anderson, from Los Angles, California, also weighing in at 235 pounds, he is the WWCF Inter-Forum Champion, Dave Von Halen!King -
Last week, the Inter-Forum Champion was victorious over Naitch’s partner Tyfo. Can Naitch avenge his friend, or will Dave go 2 and 0 against the SWC?Referee John Creed calls for the opening bell.
Naitch challenges Dave to a test of strength.
Hoss -
Naitch wants to match muscles with the Champ, but I don’t know if that’s the best strategy here.Dave accepts and the two lock hands. They tussle back and forth, with neither man gaining the advantage. Dave pulls out. Naitch challenges him to start over and again, Dave accepts. They lock up and Naitch kicks Dave in the midsection!
King -
No fair! Dave didn’t see that coming!Hoss -
That’s why they call him the dirtiest player in the game!Naitch grabs Dave and throws him to the outside! Naitch follows, hammering the Inter-Forum Champion with punches and kicks!
King -
Does he want to get disqualified?!Hoss -
I don’t think Naitch is too worried about this match, Jess. As seen last week, he has other things on his mind.King -
Yeah, but losing to the Champ won’t do him any favors down the road, Gorilla!Naitch rams Dave’s head into the ring post, then tosses him over the crowd control railing!
King -
C’mon John Creed! Do your job and get Naitch off of him!Naitch follows Dave into the crowd, peppering him with chops and kicks along the way. The Champ tries to escape, while John Creed unsuccessfully tries to follow them.
Hoss -
This one has gotten out of control, Jess!King -
No kidding! The ref needs to do something!Naitch and Dave fight up into the concession area, where Naitch throws Dave into a hotdog stand! As he reaches over to grab a hotdog, he’s Superkicked from out of nowhere!
King -
The hell?!Hoss -
Jess, it’s Jonathan Michaels!King -
You’re right Gorilla! Alright Jono! Payback for last week right there!Jono stands over Naitch, talking trash, while Dave escapes the chaotic scene!
Hoss -
This Michaels-Naitch situation is out of control, Jess!King -
Michaels was just protecting himself, Gorilla. What if Naitch decided to interrupt tonight’s briefcase presentation?!Hoss -
Well after that, I would not want to be Jonathan Michaels, especially after the presentation.King -
Speaking of the presentation, it’s up next, folks!Hoss -
We’ll be right back.*"Circus Envy" by REM plays and Caleb Fourchon stalks down the ramp carrying the Money in the Bank briefcase. The crowd boos him loudly.*
Tim Hoss:
Here comes the Number One contender for the WWCF Heavyweight Title, Caleb Fourchon. Last week he set a bounty on the current champ, Damn Right Jackson, offering the guaranteed Inter Forum title shot he won in the Money and the Bank or Bust Ladder Match to the first man to beat Jackson in the ring.Jesse King:
Which Caleb's tag team partner, Jonathan Michaels, did last week on Monday NiteRaw.TH:
Some would argue that victory is tainted, King. JoNo was only declared the winner after being attacked by Little Naitch, causing DR Jackson to be disqualified.JK:
A trivial detail.TH:
Trivial?!*Caleb walks over to the timekeeper's table to where Michael Muffer is sitting. He stares at him a long time. The unnerved ring announcer finally gets up and heads to the ring with Fourchon right behind him. He bends down and tells Muffer something.*
TH:
What's going on here?Michael Muffer:
Ladies and gentlemen, I have been told to announce that this is.... uh, The Official Money in the Bank Inter Forum Title Transfer Ceremony. Please welcome the man who has earned the right to now hold the case containing a guaranteed Inter Forum title shot contract that can be cashed in at any time before the next Gookermania: Jonathan Michaels!!*D.O.A. by "The Foo Fighters" plays and Jonathan Michaels comes out through the smoke to loud cheers, though a few boos can be heard as well.*
TH:
The Hardcore Heartthrob is hearing it from some of the fans tonight. I can understand why they might be upset. Truth be told I'm a bit disappointed in Michaels myself.JK:
Why? For doing exactly what he was supposed to do? He won his match against DR Jackson, and now its time for him to collect his reward.*As Jonathan Michaels enters the ring Caleb walks over and holds out the MitB briefcase to him.*
JoNo:
Caleb, I'm not taking this briefcase because I defeated Jackson, because, the truth is, I really didn't truly beat him.
I'm not taking this briefcase because you never said I had to beat him by pinfall or submission, therefore you are obligated to give it to me.
You see, the reason Sara didn't come out for Nakatomi Plaza tonight is because her father has instructed her to stay away from the arena until further notice.*Hideo Nakatomi makes his way down the ramp, mic in hand.*
HN:
That is correct, young man.
You may not believe this, but I actually think you are an acceptable suitor for my daughter's hand.
At least I used to.
Because, Mr. Michaels, you USED to be a champion, you used to be the most dominant figure around here, and I believed it to be only a matter of time before you were the world champion.
But recently you have been nothing but a miserable failure.
So until you have proven to me that you are worthy of her, you are not to see my daughter.TH :
I can't believe what I'm hearing, it seems Sara's father is disappointed with Jonathan.JoNo:
Sir, I intend to respect your wishes, so what is it I need to do to prove myself?HN:
First of all, earlier this evening you told me that you actually intended not to take this briefcase, because it wouldn't be the honorable thing to do.JoNo:
That's right, sir, I wanted to prove to you. . .*Hideo smacks Jonathan hard in the face.*
HN:
Prove what?
That you're weak and spineless?
I said you had to prove you were the kind of man that could provide for Sara, the kind of man who would do anything you had to do to make her happy.
So I am ordering you to take that briefcase.*Jonathan reluctantly takes the briefcase from Caleb.*
HN:
Good boy."Too Black, Too Strong... DAMN RIGHT!*I Made It*
*The crowd explode into a frenzy as the WWCF Champion's music hits, however he is nowhere to be seen. Caleb starts to freak out, screaming "YOU'RE NOT INVITED!" however, Jackson doesn't show up.*
*The crowd cheer starts to settle, and Caleb begins a cocky laugh, which leads to boos from the fans.*
*Then suddenly, Little Naitch runs down the ramp, rolls right into the ring and double legs Jono, and starts laying into him. Caleb starts to freak out, as he approached the two men brawling he turns to see DR Jackson running in from the crowd and into the ring.*
*Before Caleb can react, Jackson lays him out with a Spear, and the crowd goes wild. Jackson then picks up the briefcase that Jono dropped and clubs Caleb right in the face.*
*Jackson picks up Caleb's mic...*
DR Jackson:
I've got some bad news for you Caleb, and you Jono... according to the WWCF Officials, the bounty is still on since Michaels didn't officially defeat me, so Dread Pirate Mulligan and Little Naitch still have a shot against the Black Dynasty.
And it gets worse... You've forced me to compete in the ring every week while you just sit and watch, that party is over. For you see next week, whilst I take on Little Naitch, you must go one on one against...
JONATHON MICHAELS!
DAMN RIGHT!*Caleb, complete with busted lip, stares at Jackson in disbelief while Little Naitch and JoNo are separated by security. He shouts "You can't do that!" at Jackson, who smiles and holds up the WWCF Championship belt and points at it as the crowd erupts with applause.*
TH:
Looks like Damn Right Jackson's flexing muscles of a different type tonight! Tired of Caleb Fourchon watching from the sidelines while he competes against wrestlers the Cajun wild man has sent after him with his bounty, the champ used his clout to make a match for him. A match against Jonathan Michaels, a man with a lot to prove.JK:
Even I have to admit Jackson has played this perfectly. TH:
I bet that hurt, King.JK:
You have no idea. Let's go to commercial before I get sick on national television.[/center]