Nikki Heyman
Fry's dog Seymour
EXTREEEEEME Pony Manager
✬ Believe In The Fight ✬
Posts: 24,018
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Post by Nikki Heyman on Oct 24, 2012 16:43:24 GMT -5
I probably shouldn't even answer the phone when it comes to these people, but I had to do one this time....
I got a robocall about lowering my interest rates. I decided to "punch through" and see if they could help me.
When I got a human being, I said "Since my current rate is 0%, will you lower my rates far enough that you'll start paying me?"
they hung up ;D
Anyone else mess with a telemarketer?
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h
Hank Scorpio
Posts: 5,734
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Post by h on Oct 24, 2012 16:52:47 GMT -5
I asked a similar question of one a few years ago. My long distance plan was 1 cent per minute. He assured me that he could beat whatever plan I had. When I told him what I paid, he said that he couldn't go lower, but he could still guarantee big savings. I asked him to explain how that could work; he tried to create a scenario in which 5 cents per minute was lower than 1 cent per minute, but it didn't really work.
When I got a representative from "all of the major computer companies" calling to tell me that there was a problem with my anti-virus software, I pretended that my brother was visiting and that I suspected him of breaking my computer. I told the telemarketer that I was so hot that I was going to scald my brother with boiling water. He was both amused and concerned at the idea.
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Post by Sir Woodrow on Oct 24, 2012 16:59:26 GMT -5
I once told one I was dead
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Post by Mayonnaise on Oct 24, 2012 17:04:35 GMT -5
I get the scammers that h mentioned as well and bounce back and forth between stringing them along for awhile before asking if whatever they are wanting me to do will work on my iPhone since I don't own a computer causing them scramble or just blowing a whistle in to the phone.
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Post by Orange on Oct 24, 2012 17:11:33 GMT -5
This is one way to do it. ;D
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Post by Bone Daddy on Oct 24, 2012 17:13:48 GMT -5
About once a week I get a call from a number I don't recognize. I've been looking for a job, so I usually get really excited, pick up and hear
*LOUD BOAT HORN (SERIOUSLY F'N LOUD)* YOU WIN A CRUISE
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Post by G✇JI☈A on Oct 24, 2012 17:17:19 GMT -5
The solution at our house was simple: we kill the telemarketers!
No wait, that wasn't it. No, we just unplugged the phone. The phone line is only used for internet, and we all have mobile phones if someone wants to call. Then if we want to make a call, we just plug the phone back in.
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Post by "Gizzark" Mike Wronglevenay on Oct 24, 2012 17:43:06 GMT -5
Do you guys realise that not every telemarketer is an asshole scammer? I've worked in telemarketing, and only the successful ones are assholes. The front line guy is probably someone who is just trying to make a living doing a shitty job, which has a slightly higher pay scale because the company knows they have to deal with shit like this.
I was part of a team of telemarketers and because all of us were just taking whatever job we could get in this world of recession, the majority of us would cry at least once per shift because of how shit the job was and several of us nearly had nervous breakdowns.
Of course, that wasn't even necessarily because of the customers we would ring who would hold us personally responsible for their day being interrupted (because obviously we would pick who we wanted to ring).
It was because if we had a bad day, bad morning or even a bad hour of sales, our manager would take us off the phones for ten minutes to tell us how f***ing shit we were for ten minutes (but of course using fancy words like 'synergy') and of course, then we were even more behind on sales because we were off the phone for ten minutes.
And, the week before I quit, we were having our probationary reviews and being told one by one that if our sales didn't show some kind of upward trend by the next week, we'd be fired.
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h
Hank Scorpio
Posts: 5,734
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Post by h on Oct 24, 2012 17:43:59 GMT -5
Sometimes, I try to change the topic altogether. They're trying to be somewhat polite so that they can keep me on the line, so some of them will listen to almost anything. I told one of them a few long, rambling stories about a (fictional) trip I had taken. I called it the "Rectangle Circuit," which was a tour of all of the states with at least two 90 degree corners, and I described it in painstaking detail. After over half an hour, I told him that my computer was in the repair shop anyway (it was my first call from the representative of "all of the major computer companies').
My all-time favorite was when I pretended to misunderstand why the person was calling. I get repeated calls for someone who apparently used to have this number. When they called for him (Let's call him "Phil"), I responded with "Oh my gosh! You found Phil? Tell him I love him and that we all want him to come home!" He kept trying to explain that he was calling for Phil, not to report that he had located a missing person. Eventually, he told me, "At this point, I am legally obligated to terminate this phone call. You are clearly intoxicated, and I can't legally speak to you any further. I hope you are able to find Phil. Goodbye."
With all of that said, I got a call from a telemarketer yesterday. When I explained that nobody named Phil has had this number in many years, he was very apologetic. He promised no more calls from his office and was very polite and professional. Strangely, it ended up as a pleasant experience (and he didn't even try to sell me anything).
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Post by EvenBaldobombHasAJob on Oct 24, 2012 17:49:00 GMT -5
I've been a telemarketer before and it's a god-awful job, so I just say I'm not interested and hang up. they put up with enough shit without me piling on them for no reason.waste of both of our times.
also, if you're o0ne to yell at them, chances are they're not even listening and they are their coworkers are making fun of you. coping mechanisms and all.
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Post by "Gizzark" Mike Wronglevenay on Oct 24, 2012 17:53:56 GMT -5
Sometimes, I try to change the topic altogether. They're trying to be somewhat polite so that they can keep me on the line, so some of them will listen to almost anything. I told one of them a few long, rambling stories about a (fictional) trip I had taken. I called it the "Rectangle Circuit, which was a tour of all of the states with at least two 90 degree corners, and I described it in painstaking detail. After over half an hour, I told him that my computer was in the repair shop anyway (it was my first call from the representative of "all of the major computer companies'). My all-time favorite was when I pretended to misunderstand why the person was calling. I get repeated calls for someone who apparently used to have this number. When they called for him (Let's call him "Phil"), I responded with "Oh my gosh! You found Phil? Tell him I love him and that we all want him to come home!" He kept trying to explain that he was calling for Phil, not to report that he had located a missing person. Eventually, he told me, "At this point, I am legally obligated to terminate this phone call. You are clearly intoxicated, and I can't legally speak to you any further. I hope you are able to find Phil. Goodbye." With all of that said, I got a call from a telemarketer yesterday. When I explained that nobody named Phil has had this number in many years, he was very apologetic. He promised no more calls from his office and was very polite and professional. Strangely, it ended up as a pleasant experience (and he didn't even try to sell me anything). It's not about keeping you on the line to sell you stuff. It's about you having to say specific things more than once before they can let the call end. They're not allowed to hang up on you most of the time and you need to repeatedly say you don't want the offer they are making.
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Post by Mayonnaise on Oct 24, 2012 18:41:28 GMT -5
Do you guys realise that not every telemarketer is an asshole scammer? I've worked in telemarketing, and only the successful ones are assholes. The front line guy is probably someone who is just trying to make a living doing a s***ty job, which has a slightly higher pay scale because the company knows they have to deal with s*** like this. I was part of a team of telemarketers and because all of us were just taking whatever job we could get in this world of recession, the majority of us would cry at least once per shift because of how s*** the job was and several of us nearly had nervous breakdowns. Of course, that wasn't even necessarily because of the customers we would ring who would hold us personally responsible for their day being interrupted (because obviously we would pick who we wanted to ring). It was because if we had a bad day, bad morning or even a bad hour of sales, our manager would take us off the phones for ten minutes to tell us how f***ing s*** we were for ten minutes (but of course using fancy words like 'synergy') and of course, then we were even more behind on sales because we were off the phone for ten minutes. And, the week before I quit, we were having our probationary reviews and being told one by one that if our sales didn't show some kind of upward trend by the next week, we'd be fired. I feel for anyone that has to work a legitimate telemarketing job because I know the hell I gave them back in my younger days but, I am also smart enough to know the difference between a legitimate company/charity/political organization and the people calling from VOIP lines based out of Jamaica looking for a quick dollar. I know no one from a hair salon in Atlanta or sporting goods store in Ohio are going to call and offer to repair my Macintosh Windows based PC.
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Post by Red Impact on Oct 24, 2012 19:13:07 GMT -5
Do you guys realise that not every telemarketer is an asshole scammer? I've worked in telemarketing, and only the successful ones are assholes. The front line guy is probably someone who is just trying to make a living doing a s***ty job, which has a slightly higher pay scale because the company knows they have to deal with s*** like this. I was part of a team of telemarketers and because all of us were just taking whatever job we could get in this world of recession, the majority of us would cry at least once per shift because of how s*** the job was and several of us nearly had nervous breakdowns. Of course, that wasn't even necessarily because of the customers we would ring who would hold us personally responsible for their day being interrupted (because obviously we would pick who we wanted to ring). It was because if we had a bad day, bad morning or even a bad hour of sales, our manager would take us off the phones for ten minutes to tell us how f***ing s*** we were for ten minutes (but of course using fancy words like 'synergy') and of course, then we were even more behind on sales because we were off the phone for ten minutes. And, the week before I quit, we were having our probationary reviews and being told one by one that if our sales didn't show some kind of upward trend by the next week, we'd be fired. Honestly, I don't really care. Yeah, it's a shitty job, but telemarketers having a shitty job doesn't mean I have to accept random solicitation for vacations I don't want when I'm busy doing things that actually matter to me. If it's not a business I deal with, I don't want to be called for offers.
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Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
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Post by Deleted on Oct 24, 2012 19:48:07 GMT -5
I usually listen politely then tell them I'm not interested.
You shouldn't f*** with telemarketers....that's like trying cheat a stripper out of money. Life's clearly dealt them a shitty hand, why should I make it worse.
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Push R Truth
Patti Mayonnaise
Unique and Special Snowflake, and a pants-less heathen.
Perpetually Constipated
Posts: 39,208
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Post by Push R Truth on Oct 24, 2012 20:00:53 GMT -5
I tell all political callers that I'm a felon and can't vote
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Vampiro138
Hank Scorpio
the greatest vampire in the HISTORY of our sport
Posts: 5,708
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Post by Vampiro138 on Oct 24, 2012 20:15:06 GMT -5
usually when i get a call from a number i dont know i always answer it the same way "thank you for calling Saint. John Nepomucene catholic church and casino, this is Father Dougal McGuire how can i help you today?"
after that they will hang up, i used to work in telemarketing i figure i would make it easier to move onto the next call for them.
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mizerable
Fry's dog Seymour
You're the lowest on the totem pole here, Alva. The lowest.
Posts: 23,475
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Post by mizerable on Oct 24, 2012 20:21:12 GMT -5
I've been a telemarketer, I can guarantee you that I have heard just about everything. So for someone to be clever in this line, they've got to be really out there...and that almost never happens. So when you think you're going to get them to hang up...you're not...and if they do, they'll mark the call as a communicate error and call back...so unless you're looking to just waste your time, I suggest just saying the following;
"Please, put me on your do not call list. Thank you."
Most (not all) telemarketers oblige. The "do not call list" usually removes you from their records, however if you applied online for a job or anything like that, chances are you're going to get more people calling you. But they're usually good about doing what you ask for them. The things they don't like is having someone be nasty with them. I've gotten everything from whistles blown in my ear, to everything nasty said about myself and my family...so you're usually kicking dirt on a person who might already be upset. You might think that call centers are scummy, but they're one of the higher employing jobs out there when it comes to what is expected. You know why? Because it's a stressful job. You have a goal to meet every single day. You have to convince the person on the other end of the phone that what you're selling is a good thing and you CANNOT go off script or anything like that. I've seen some really good people who are there trying to support a family because they were recently laid off elsewhere be let go because they couldn't make it. It's even worse if the person is volunteering their time.
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Post by "I'm Batman..." on Oct 24, 2012 20:31:46 GMT -5
My first job was telemarketing, I hated it. I just tell them no thanks.
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kidglov3s
Bill S. Preston, Esq.
Wants her Shot
Who is Tiger Maskooo?
Posts: 15,870
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Post by kidglov3s on Oct 24, 2012 20:34:05 GMT -5
A vicious circle. People are starving, can only find telemarketing job. People are annoyed by telemarketers. Telemarketers sit there and take it.
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Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
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Post by Deleted on Oct 24, 2012 20:40:06 GMT -5
Meh. They're just people with crappy jobs. They're irritating, sure, but so is trying to make it in this day and age.
The only ill will I have is to those that literally don't take no for an answer.
There's a fine line between being a go-getter and being a penisface.
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