Really want to ask this girl out...

["I'm Batman..."]

I really like this girl, but we work together. She's going to be leaving for another unit in a few weeks. We work on a college campus. Thinking about asking her out, even just for her number makes me nervous. I am not even sure if she is interested.

[Mozenrath]

Then find out. Ask her.

Provided it is not going to be a breach of any rules or something, just try it. You don't need to get into the practice of buckling down from fear or you will miss a good deal of opportunities in your life.

["Gentleman" AJ Powell]

Gotta take the leap dude. It'll suck the first few times, but after a few, you get immune to the rejection, realise it ain't all that bad and it becomes irrelevant to you.

[Glitch]

How familiar are you guys with each other? If she's a friend you could easily ask for her number or facebook under the guise that you can invite her to parties/get togethers.

[Wolf Hawkfield no1 NZ poster]

Just do it man the worst that can happen is she says no.

[mizerable]

Just from experience, asking someone out you work with is more times than not a big mistake. I dated a girl for 2 months at my 2nd job and when it fell apart, it became VERY awkward to work at the same time.

[Mozenrath]

Jun 27, 2013 20:06:22 GMT -5 mizerable said:

Just from experience, asking someone out you work with is more times than not a big mistake. I dated a girl for 2 months at my 2nd job and when it fell apart, it became VERY awkward to work at the same time.

To be fair, she is leaving his department, so they won't have to work together if it goes badly.

As for asking for the number under the guise of something else, I would not recommend it. It's not a very good idea to disguise your intentions in these sorts of circumstances.

[The Booty Disciple]

Jun 27, 2013 19:35:37 GMT -5 Glitch said:

How familiar are you guys with each other? If she's a friend you could easily ask for her number or facebook under the guise that you can invite her to parties/get togethers.

Don't do this. Be straight up about how you feel. If nothing else, she should respect the fact that you were open and honest, rather than trying to weasel yourself in with false pretenses about parties.

Be a man about it. If you have to lie to get a number (ala the suggestion above), you're starting things out on the wrong foot.

SPOILER: Click to show

{Spoiler}{Spoiler}

I also recommend listening to this before you do it...

[Glitch]

Jun 27, 2013 20:14:34 GMT -5 The Booty Disciple said:

Jun 27, 2013 19:35:37 GMT -5 Glitch said:

How familiar are you guys with each other? If she's a friend you could easily ask for her number or facebook under the guise that you can invite her to parties/get togethers.

Don't do this. Be straight up about how you feel. If nothing else, she should respect the fact that you were open and honest, rather than trying to weasel yourself in with false pretenses about parties.

Be a man about it. If you have to lie to get a number (ala the suggestion above), you're starting things out on the wrong foot.

SPOILER: Click to show

{Spoiler}{Spoiler}

I also recommend listening to this before you do it...

Please tell me your not implying that he'll be stuck in "the friendzone" by trying to get to know her better before confessing.
There's nothing wrong with admitting his feelings while their hanging out rather than in the office. I really doubt she is gonna get angry at him because he wanted to hang out with her before hand.

Plus I never that he should he should avoid being up front. He's got options and it's up to him to see which works best.

[Sponsored by Groose Wipes]

It's better to know then it is to wonder. Trust me.

[The Booty Disciple]

Jun 27, 2013 21:28:36 GMT -5 Glitch said:

Jun 27, 2013 20:14:34 GMT -5 The Booty Disciple said:

Don't do this. Be straight up about how you feel. If nothing else, she should respect the fact that you were open and honest, rather than trying to weasel yourself in with false pretenses about parties.

Be a man about it. If you have to lie to get a number (ala the suggestion above), you're starting things out on the wrong foot.

SPOILER: Click to show

{Spoiler}{Spoiler}

I also recommend listening to this before you do it...

Please tell me your not implying that he'll be stuck in "the friendzone" by trying to get to know her better before confessing.
There's nothing wrong with admitting his feelings while their hanging out rather than in the office. I really doubt she is gonna get angry at him because he wanted to hang out with her before hand.

Plus I never that he should he should avoid being up front. He's got options and it's up to him to see which works best.

Hardly. You're the one who suggested that he try to get her number via false pretenses. I did quite the opposite...I advised him to be FRICKIN' HONEST.

You didn't say ANYTHING about when/where he should discuss how he feels. You said, very plainly, that he should get her number under false pretenses using the "guise of parties/get togethers."

Please note the definition of the word "guise."

Hiding his true intentions of why he wants her phone number? I find that personally distasteful for a number of reasons, all of them tying back to the idea that HONESTY results in more positive outcomes for both parties involved.

I can only speak of my own personal experiences, but I can say this: I've tried it both ways, and while I didn't always get the date, I sure as hell got a lot more respect from the lady of my affection when I went up to them and said "Hey. I want you to know that I really think you're a neat individual, and wondered if I could take you out sometime," rather than creating all sorts of dumb hoops with dubious honesty for her to jump through.

Your mileage may vary, but if you can't gut up and talk to a gal now, chances are you won't at the party, and the OTHER guys at the party who have the nuts to talk to her on the level will be the ones getting a second date.

[Glitch]

Jun 27, 2013 22:18:22 GMT -5 The Booty Disciple said:

Jun 27, 2013 21:28:36 GMT -5 Glitch said:

Please tell me your not implying that he'll be stuck in "the friendzone" by trying to get to know her better before confessing.
There's nothing wrong with admitting his feelings while their hanging out rather than in the office. I really doubt she is gonna get angry at him because he wanted to hang out with her before hand.

Plus I never that he should he should avoid being up front. He's got options and it's up to him to see which works best.

Hardly. You're the one who suggested that he try to get her number via false pretenses. I did quite the opposite...I advised him to be FRICKIN' HONEST.

You didn't say ANYTHING about when/where he should discuss how he feels. You said, very plainly, that he should get her number under false pretenses using the "guise of parties/get togethers."

Please note the definition of the word "guise."

Hiding his true intentions of why he wants her phone number? I find that personally distasteful for a number of reasons, all of them tying back to the idea that HONESTY results in more positive outcomes for both parties involved.

I can only speak of my own personal experiences, but I can say this: I've tried it both ways, and while I didn't always get the date, I sure as hell got a lot more respect from the lady of my affection when I went up to them and said "Hey. I want you to know that I really think you're a neat individual, and wondered if I could take you out sometime," rather than creating all sorts of dumb hoops with dubious honesty for her to jump through.

Your mileage may vary, but if you can't gut up and talk to a gal now, chances are you won't at the party, and the OTHER guys at the party who have the nuts to talk to her on the level will be the ones getting a second date.

Correct,guise is indeed a bad use of words, but I did say "If she's a friend". So using a time when your hanging out to get your feelings out doesn't sound that bad. It's not making her jump through hoops if it goes as simple as "hang out --> talk to her". Of course I also shouldn't have used the "party" since that is implying a huge gathering of people getting buzzed(which is a whole other discussion).

Then it all depends on how this girl is and the environment. She might be completely different from the women you go after. The surroundings of you and me are probably very different as well. Hell, I've run into girls who prefer shy guys.
I don't know what exactly this guys situation is, I'm just suggesting based on what I've seen around me. It's all up to him.

[beamanhogan]

Go for it. If she says no, big deal. You can try and keep it simple as well. Ask if she wants to go out for coffee after work. It wouldn't be a full date, but you two would be able to gauge if a second date could happen.

[Brandon Walsh is Insane.]

Jun 27, 2013 22:18:22 GMT -5 The Booty Disciple said:

Jun 27, 2013 21:28:36 GMT -5 Glitch said:

Please tell me your not implying that he'll be stuck in "the friendzone" by trying to get to know her better before confessing.
There's nothing wrong with admitting his feelings while their hanging out rather than in the office. I really doubt she is gonna get angry at him because he wanted to hang out with her before hand.

Plus I never that he should he should avoid being up front. He's got options and it's up to him to see which works best.

Hardly. You're the one who suggested that he try to get her number via false pretenses. I did quite the opposite...I advised him to be FRICKIN' HONEST.

You didn't say ANYTHING about when/where he should discuss how he feels. You said, very plainly, that he should get her number under false pretenses using the "guise of parties/get togethers."

Please note the definition of the word "guise."

Hiding his true intentions of why he wants her phone number? I find that personally distasteful for a number of reasons, all of them tying back to the idea that HONESTY results in more positive outcomes for both parties involved.

I can only speak of my own personal experiences, but I can say this: I've tried it both ways, and while I didn't always get the date, I sure as hell got a lot more respect from the lady of my affection when I went up to them and said "Hey. I want you to know that I really think you're a neat individual, and wondered if I could take you out sometime," rather than creating all sorts of dumb hoops with dubious honesty for her to jump through.

Your mileage may vary, but if you can't gut up and talk to a gal now, chances are you won't at the party, and the OTHER guys at the party who have the nuts to talk to her on the level will be the ones getting a second date.

I think it's calling the girls 'neat' that is ruining it for you.

I know you had me until you called me a neat individual.

BTW... Batman, is there an update for this story

[BlackoutCreature]

Jun 27, 2013 19:37:51 GMT -5 Wolf Hawkfield no1 NZ poster said:

Just do it man the worst that can happen is she says no.

There are a lot worse things that can happen then her saying "no".

That being said, go for it. Its usually worth the risk.

[Banecat]

Jun 27, 2013 18:25:11 GMT -5 "I'm Batman..." said:

I really like this girl, but we work together. She's going to be leaving for another unit in a few weeks. We work on a college campus. Thinking about asking her out, even just for her number makes me nervous. I am not even sure if she is interested.

You see yourself as a guy who can't pick up this chick. Stop that, visualize in your mind successfully asking this girl out and make that visualization a reality.

From Orbital's live version of Satan, "There's a funny thing about regret that it's better to regret something you have done then regret something you haven't done"

[Deleted]

If you don't ask you're not going to find out. Rejection isn't that bad really. Don't put this chick on a pedestal and flirt with as many girls as you can, keep your options open.

[Kash Flagg]

Billboards. Lots and lots of billboards.

[Glitch]

Jun 30, 2013 15:44:52 GMT -5 Kash Flagg said:

Billboards. Lots and lots of billboards.

And don't forgot the flyers released from the blimp.

[Beets by Schrute]

Suck it up. Get her number and do not look nervous. Women love confident guys. If she rejects, there is still over a billion women on this Earth. Just don't let your shyness overcome and prevent future opportunities.

SPOILER: Click to show

{Spoiler}{Spoiler}Hell, you're the goddamn Batman!! No chick should intimidate you