Miller-ize a story

[OGBoardPoster2005]

Comics, movies, whatever, sorta like the Russo threads. What if Frank Miller wrote for instance say.....Spiderman?

Peter Parker, age 17 is bitten by a radioactive Spider and turns into Spider-Man, much to the envy of Iron Man who is jealous of the hot young start Hero, not knowing he is an intern at Stark Enterprises. Peter also struggles with the affection of his love interest, Mary Jane Watson, who fantasizes about Spider-Man and other heroes on a daily basis, even at one point attending a party held by Tony Stark and seducing Iron Man, causing a fight to ensue between Stark, who reciprocates the interest and Peter, whose trying to keep his friend from falling into ruin. Peter is fired by Stark and starts working for Oscorp, whose leader Norman Osborn decides to try and blackmail Peter into being Spider-Man to steal information from Stark.

[Deleted]

Miller has written Spider-man stories.

[Big DSR Energy]

I thought you meant Dennis Miller. I was all set to go on a rant about the Peloponnesian War and how it relates to The Bourne Legacy.

[Cela]

"She's got an ass you can bounce quarters off and tits that you just want to bury your face in, and when she finds him, she wants to jump him right then and there, but first she has to kill the Pig, and later his little f******* Meerkat. No worries is the product of a sick communist conspiracy, tonight they feel the love."

[BorneAgain]

"Leafs of all types are falling now. Falling like the hopes of progress and change in this meaningless little spot. I look around and see little more than death. Not physically, but the death of intelligence, patience, enlightenment, all of it. That damned tiger, hopped up on a drug worse than any methamphetamine, his own excitement, unable to see past his own obnoxious self, narcissistic to the end. The hare putters about as he always does, more concerned about keeping things dirt free and being orderly than the well being of others; cleanliness is substitute for godliness to him. Off in the corner is the pig, so pitiful, doomed to never know anything beyond this place too cowardly to be anything more than the little brother to be saved by the adults. Mother and son are here, her having sacrificed her dreams to raise him, putting every resentment behind that plastic smile, while junior just nods his head as the clock ticks down to the day his eyes will be open and his innocence will be swallowed up like the honey consumed by the fat bear. Oh yes, the one more stomach than brains; he's the one best off, too stupid to realize just how stupid he is, engaging his best attempts at thinking blissfully unaware of what little his own life will amount too. And looking down on all of us is that flying Strigine fool, putting out every one of his words as if God himself was speaking through him. Pretentious prick, words too kind to describe him. The boy is nowhere to be seen, putting the likes of us in the back of his mind, that is we're still there at all. Every denizen of these woods, caught up in their own delusional world, moving around this party in a daze, acknowledging each other in their own ridiculous way, every one except me.

Not that anyone cares about ol' Eeyore."

[FinalGwen]

I can't do it better than David Willis.

[Legion]

I was expecting Mark Miller and fully expected MJ and/or Peter to get raped.

[BorneAgain]

Aug 23, 2013 12:12:54 GMT -5 OGBoardPoster2005 said:

Comics, movies, whatever, sorta like the Russo threads. What if Frank Miller wrote for instance say.....Spiderman?

Peter Parker, age 17 is bitten by a radioactive Spider and turns into Spider-Man, much to the envy of Iron Man who is jealous of the hot young start Hero, not knowing he is an intern at Stark Enterprises. Peter also struggles with the affection of his love interest, Mary Jane Watson, who fantasizes about Spider-Man and other heroes on a daily basis, even at one point attending a party held by Tony Stark and seducing Iron Man, causing a fight to ensue between Stark, who reciprocates the interest and Peter, whose trying to keep his friend from falling into ruin. Peter is fired by Stark and starts working for Oscorp, whose leader Norman Osborn decides to try and blackmail Peter into being Spider-Man to steal information from Stark.

Black Cat being a dominatrix prostitute as well of course.

[hossfan]

"Gilmore Whores"

[Joe Neglia]

Casper: Year One would deal with a little boy blissfully unaware that his father is a small-time crook/police informant and that his mother was some bar floozy who left the boy on the guy's doorstep, about a year after their one-nighter. One day, a vengeful loan shark arrives to collect and to show he's serious, well, that's how get Casper the Friendly Ghost.

[Mozenrath]

Superman one day was eating paint and drooling all over his shirt. Suddenly, Batman flexed his muscles and Lois Lane immediately quit her job as a journalist/hooker and professed her undying devotion to Batman, who was shaped like a scowling tree-trunk. Superman, in retaliation, flew backwards into a volcano on accident and burnt his toast.

[theryno665]

"Are you f***ing retarded? I'm goddamn Matter-Eater Lad!"

[Baldobomb-22-OH-MAN!!!]

Aug 23, 2013 14:48:31 GMT -5 Legion said:

I was expecting Mark Miller and fully expected MJ and/or Peter to get raped.

Kevin Smith already beat him to it with Black Cat

[A Platypus Rave is Correct]

Aug 23, 2013 18:42:55 GMT -5 theryno665 said:

"Are you f***ing retarded? I'm goddamn Matter-Eater Lad!"

...I would actually read the hell out of this comic. ... the hell is wrong with me?

[BayleyTiffyCodyCenaJudyHopps]

The Smurfs wouldn't just have slight socialist overtones, they'd be a full blown totalitarian regime with little blue people. And of course Smurfette would be a hooker by day and a freedom fighter by night.

[wildojinx]

Rainbow Brite vs Murky: The final showdown

"You dont get it Murky, this isnt a forest, its a dress store, and this is your fitting!" (punches murky in the face)

[Goldenbane]

"What ever possessed God in heaven to create a man like Rambo!"

"God didn't create Rambo. I made him."

[BorneAgain]

Aug 23, 2013 23:27:58 GMT -5 wildojinx said:

Rainbow Brite vs Murky: The final showdown

"You dont get it Murky, this isnt a forest, its a dress store, and this is your fitting!" (punches murky in the face)

My Little Pony... Millerized!

Trixie: You always said friendship is magic.
Twilight Sparkle: Yeah... too bad we're not friends.
*blasts Trixie with her magic gun*

[Glitch]

Batman would be a space cowboy
Robin would be the gangster of love
And I guess Commissioner Gorden would be called Maurice.

The Joker could also be a smoker and midnight toker.

[Deleted]

Aug 23, 2013 18:38:48 GMT -5 Mozenrath said:

Superman one day was eating paint and drooling all over his shirt. Suddenly, Batman flexed his muscles and Lois Lane immediately quit her job as a journalist/hooker and professed her undying devotion to Batman, who was shaped like a scowling tree-trunk. Superman, in retaliation, flew backwards into a volcano on accident and burnt his toast.

Aug 23, 2013 18:38:48 GMT -5 Mozenrath said:

shaped like a scowling tree-trunk

I can't stop laughing at this.