Push R Truth
Patti Mayonnaise
Unique and Special Snowflake, and a pants-less heathen.
Perpetually Constipated
Posts: 39,276
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Post by Push R Truth on Sept 2, 2014 7:58:31 GMT -5
One time my sister Brie got this cat stuck up her ass. True story. She bought it at our local mall, so the whole fiasco wound up on the news. It was embarrasing for my relatives and all, but next week, she did it again. Different cat, same results, complete with another trip to the emergency room. So, I run into her a week later in the mall and she's buying another cat. And I says to her, "Jesus, Brie! What are you doing? You know you're just gonna get this cat stuck up your ass too. Why don't you knock it off?" And she said to me, "Nikki, how the hell else am I supposed to get the gerbil out?" My sister was a weird girl.
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Abadebe
Don Corleone
Man of the Hour
Posts: 1,467
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Post by Abadebe on Sept 2, 2014 9:17:59 GMT -5
When we were younger, Brie told me she could see the future and she was going to tell my fortune. Instead, she just spat in my hand and laughed. I still don't have my own swimming pool.
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Post by Confused Mark Wahlberg on Sept 2, 2014 9:32:59 GMT -5
"My sister a Brie told me she had an interesting picture to show me. All she said was, 'Kevin Dunn + Vince's office + bearskin rug'. Damn you to hell for showing me that picture, Brie!"
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Post by Pgarodactyl on Sept 2, 2014 16:06:23 GMT -5
Found this one in my internetal travels...
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The Sam
El Dandy
The Brainiest Sam of all
Posts: 8,423
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Post by The Sam on Sept 3, 2014 4:56:19 GMT -5
Nikki: Brie is my sister John Cena: *slaps her* I said I want the truth! Nikki: She's my sister *John Cena slaps her again* Nikki: She's my daughter *John Cena slaps her again* Nikki: My sister... *slap* Nikki: ...my daughter... *even more slaps* John Cena: I said I want the truth! *throws Nikki to the ground* Nikki: She's my sister AND my daughter!!! Jimmy Uso: Forget it kid, it's Flair Country.
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Doctor Of Style
King Koopa
Well, first they love me, and then they don't. Sometimes they do it, and sometimes they won't.
Posts: 12,104
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Post by Doctor Of Style on Sept 3, 2014 7:00:36 GMT -5
One time my sister Brie took a shit so huge, Brian Pillman lied and claimed it was his. I never told anyone.
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Post by Ryback on a Pole! on Sept 3, 2014 7:09:34 GMT -5
"Whenever we play Monopoly, Brie never let's me be the dog. But I never told anybody."
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Mozenrath
FANatic
Foppery and Whim
Speedy Speed Boy
Posts: 121,034
Member is Online
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Post by Mozenrath on Sept 3, 2014 7:20:26 GMT -5
In third grade, she cheated on her history exam. In fourth grade, she stole our uncle Max's toupee and she glued it on her face when she was Moses in our Hebrew School play. In fifth grade, she knocked our brother down the stairs and she blamed it on the dog... when our mom sent us to the summer camp for fat kids and then they served lunch she got nuts and she pigged out and they kicked us out... but the worst thing she's ever done - she mixed a pot of fake puke at home and then we went to this movie theater, she hid the puke in her jacket, climbed up to the balcony and then, t-t-then, she made a noise like this: hua-hua-hua-huaaaaaaa - and then she dumped it over the side, all over the people in the audience. And then, this was horrible, all the people started getting sick and throwing up all over each other! I never told anyone.
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Post by sunnytaker on Sept 3, 2014 8:42:33 GMT -5
"Back when he was clean shaven i told brie i thought Daniel Bryan was kinda cute. The next day Brie asked him out and made him grow out his ugly goatface beard to troll me for stealing the guy i liked. i tried to tell John about it but he just waved his hand in front of my face and said 'you can;t see him'. so i let Brie marry the man i thought was cute first. i never told anyone."
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jagilki
Patti Mayonnaise
Nobody notices him; No, we noticed him
f*** Cancer
Posts: 33,594
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Post by jagilki on Sept 3, 2014 14:14:03 GMT -5
Brie once used wire hangers. WIRE Hangers. To hang clothes with.
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Post by CATCH_US IS the Conversation on Sept 3, 2014 14:20:24 GMT -5
"Back when he was clean shaven i told brie i thought Daniel Bryan was kinda cute. The next day Brie asked him out and made him grow out his ugly goatface beard to troll me for stealing the guy i liked. i tried to tell John about it but he just waved his hand in front of my face and said 'you can;t see him'. so i let Brie marry the man i thought was cute first. i never told anyone." I know Nikki. I know. Come over here and let me give you a hug. Yeah...like that...
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Post by edgestar on Sept 3, 2014 22:12:05 GMT -5
Brie told me Cena liked candles on his countertops, then he made that face to me.
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Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
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Post by Deleted on Sept 3, 2014 22:17:32 GMT -5
My sister would womanize, she would drink. She would make outrageous claims like she invented the question mark. Sometimes she would accuse chestnuts of being lazy.
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