Post by Dr. T is an alien on Sept 28, 2014 22:19:53 GMT -5
I have commented here frequently about my struggles with my stepson, though I did try to go a little while without posting about it. Here's the basics to get you caught up:
1) He had a court date earlier this month about his arrest for pot possession (from December). Despite the fact that this appearance was a second continuance, they granted him another extension to March because he could not pay his fees.
2) He finally has a job with a temp agency, but the only benefit to me is that he is not home sometimes. It is not as though his money is going to anything productive. He isn't paying his fees (my wife had made a deal with him that we would pay a little towards his fees if he did as well. He said he did, so we did, but he lied). He isn't buying his own food (he eats more than the rest of the family combined). He isn't paying rent. He isn't paying gas money despite expecting rides from us every day. Last week he decided he did not want to work the assignment they gave him, for which I was certain that they were going to fire him. They did not, but they might tomorrow because he decided that he did not have to work the new job on the weekend. I don't care. It does not cost me anything extra to have him not work anymore since he pays for nothing and simply leaches.
3) What does his money go for? It all goes to ensure that he never has a moment of sobriety. He is either high or drunk (usually high) at every moment he is home. We have kicked him out a dozen times for it and he simply shows up the next day and expects us to let him back in. Last month I kicked him out and caught him trying to break into the house. I called the cops on him, and they informed us that the smug, little prick has the legal right to be there and that we could not simply kick him out without actually going through the eviction process. From that point on he felt that he had no reason whatsoever to show me the slightest bit of respect since even if I started the eviction process I would have to put up with him for however long it takes and that during that time.
4) I no longer have much interaction with him. He gives me the silent treatment, but at this point I actually do not care. He flat out told me that he did not care about me and he showed just how little he cared on the day that the cops made us let him back into the house. He picked an argument with me after the cops left because what was I going to do about it? Eventually I nearly collapsed during the argument because I suffered some sort of stress-related cardiac issue. I legitimately thought I was having a stroke or a heart attack and told him so. His response? "Whatever, I don't care." he said, and then laid down to take a nap. After that point I simply gave up on him. The kid that I tried to raise right decided that I meant nothing and did not care if I lived or died. To paraphrase Ben Kenobi, the good kid that I raised died when he decided that he embraced his worthless father's lifestyle and became whatever the hell he is now. If he refuses to acknowledge me, then I can ignore him as well and have next to nothing to do with him.
Anyways, this evening my wife got after me about getting the yard mowed. She wanted me to go get gas for the mower (we don't actually keep any gas for it and leave it empty because he would huff it if we kept any on hand). I went and got gas for the mower, went out to my shed to get the mower to fill it, and discovered just how much of a mess he had made of my shed since he spent every waking moment in the damned thing. I damned well knew that he was getting high out there every f***ing day, but my wife had told me to ignore it for a while for my own health's sake. The smell was terrible. There was a pungent mix of pot, ashes, beer, gas fumes, and some other smells in my shed. I found a ton of beer cans, a couple of cans of aerosol duster, an open container containing gasoline (which is where the fumes came from) and he had been using the floor of the shed as an ashtray (yep, once again he was mixing gas fumes and open flames).
I flew off the handle. My wife went to talk to the ungrateful shit while I started throwing everything I found away. He got upset that I was throwing away stuff he paid money for, though he was for once not stupid enough to complain about it to me (and my wife told him that she did not give a shit when he complained to her). He left, allegedly to go to the grocery store, but I know damned good and well that he was just leaving to go and replace the shit I threw away.
I just cannot handle this shit anymore.
1) He had a court date earlier this month about his arrest for pot possession (from December). Despite the fact that this appearance was a second continuance, they granted him another extension to March because he could not pay his fees.
2) He finally has a job with a temp agency, but the only benefit to me is that he is not home sometimes. It is not as though his money is going to anything productive. He isn't paying his fees (my wife had made a deal with him that we would pay a little towards his fees if he did as well. He said he did, so we did, but he lied). He isn't buying his own food (he eats more than the rest of the family combined). He isn't paying rent. He isn't paying gas money despite expecting rides from us every day. Last week he decided he did not want to work the assignment they gave him, for which I was certain that they were going to fire him. They did not, but they might tomorrow because he decided that he did not have to work the new job on the weekend. I don't care. It does not cost me anything extra to have him not work anymore since he pays for nothing and simply leaches.
3) What does his money go for? It all goes to ensure that he never has a moment of sobriety. He is either high or drunk (usually high) at every moment he is home. We have kicked him out a dozen times for it and he simply shows up the next day and expects us to let him back in. Last month I kicked him out and caught him trying to break into the house. I called the cops on him, and they informed us that the smug, little prick has the legal right to be there and that we could not simply kick him out without actually going through the eviction process. From that point on he felt that he had no reason whatsoever to show me the slightest bit of respect since even if I started the eviction process I would have to put up with him for however long it takes and that during that time.
4) I no longer have much interaction with him. He gives me the silent treatment, but at this point I actually do not care. He flat out told me that he did not care about me and he showed just how little he cared on the day that the cops made us let him back into the house. He picked an argument with me after the cops left because what was I going to do about it? Eventually I nearly collapsed during the argument because I suffered some sort of stress-related cardiac issue. I legitimately thought I was having a stroke or a heart attack and told him so. His response? "Whatever, I don't care." he said, and then laid down to take a nap. After that point I simply gave up on him. The kid that I tried to raise right decided that I meant nothing and did not care if I lived or died. To paraphrase Ben Kenobi, the good kid that I raised died when he decided that he embraced his worthless father's lifestyle and became whatever the hell he is now. If he refuses to acknowledge me, then I can ignore him as well and have next to nothing to do with him.
Anyways, this evening my wife got after me about getting the yard mowed. She wanted me to go get gas for the mower (we don't actually keep any gas for it and leave it empty because he would huff it if we kept any on hand). I went and got gas for the mower, went out to my shed to get the mower to fill it, and discovered just how much of a mess he had made of my shed since he spent every waking moment in the damned thing. I damned well knew that he was getting high out there every f***ing day, but my wife had told me to ignore it for a while for my own health's sake. The smell was terrible. There was a pungent mix of pot, ashes, beer, gas fumes, and some other smells in my shed. I found a ton of beer cans, a couple of cans of aerosol duster, an open container containing gasoline (which is where the fumes came from) and he had been using the floor of the shed as an ashtray (yep, once again he was mixing gas fumes and open flames).
I flew off the handle. My wife went to talk to the ungrateful shit while I started throwing everything I found away. He got upset that I was throwing away stuff he paid money for, though he was for once not stupid enough to complain about it to me (and my wife told him that she did not give a shit when he complained to her). He left, allegedly to go to the grocery store, but I know damned good and well that he was just leaving to go and replace the shit I threw away.
I just cannot handle this shit anymore.
