Spider2024
Patti Mayonnaise
Dedicated 6,666th post to Irontyger
I believe in Joe Hendry.
Posts: 39,192
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Post by Spider2024 on Jul 29, 2016 9:50:39 GMT -5
My bad joke for this Friday is in the form of a bad play-on-words that Shaq tried in one of his rap songs:
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Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
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Post by Deleted on Jul 29, 2016 10:58:01 GMT -5
There was a boy named Booty Itches. He would be sent to the principal's office frequently for insisting his name was Booty Itches. One day Booty Itches was hit by a car. His mother ran up her unconscious son and cried out, "My poor little Booty Itches!"
A passerby yelled, "Then scratch it, ma'am!"
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Post by taker1990 on Jul 29, 2016 16:19:10 GMT -5
Did you hear about the fire at the circus?
It was in tents.
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Post by DASH 243✅ on Jul 29, 2016 21:55:53 GMT -5
What do clouds wear under their shorts? Thunderpants
Sorry that was bad
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Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
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Post by Deleted on Jul 30, 2016 8:35:31 GMT -5
Vince Russo walks into a bar and blames Dutch Mantell
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Post by bibboid on Jul 30, 2016 17:12:23 GMT -5
What kind of dog does a magician own?
A Labracadabrador.
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Sam Punk
Hank Scorpio
Own Nothing, Be Happy
Posts: 6,302
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Post by Sam Punk on Jul 30, 2016 22:54:15 GMT -5
What happened to the peanut at the ball game?
He got a-salted.
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Gecko
Grimlock
FAN Pyrite Member. Muahahaha
Posts: 13,244
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Post by Gecko on Aug 6, 2016 5:16:04 GMT -5
A farmer was in a field with his cows and after counting them found he had 196, but when he rounded them up he had 200.
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Derk!
Hank Scorpio
Yeah, "looks like."
Posts: 5,066
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Post by Derk! on Aug 6, 2016 20:08:22 GMT -5
Why did the tomato blush?
Because he saw the salad dressing.
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Post by DASH 243✅ on Aug 26, 2016 18:24:13 GMT -5
Q. How do you make pickle bread?
A. With dill dough
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Mozenrath
FANatic
Foppery and Whim
Speedy Speed Boy
Posts: 121,032
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Post by Mozenrath on Aug 26, 2016 18:40:56 GMT -5
What kind of marsupial comes from Malaysia? Koala Lumpur.
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Perd
Patti Mayonnaise
Leslie needs to butt out for fear of receiving The Bunghole Buster
Posts: 31,942
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Post by Perd on Aug 26, 2016 19:12:05 GMT -5
What's the difference between being horny and being hungry? Where you put the cucumber.
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Post by DASH 243✅ on Aug 26, 2016 19:34:57 GMT -5
Why was the snowman smiling
He heard the snow blower coming
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Sephiroth
Wade Wilson
Surviving
Posts: 28,885
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Post by Sephiroth on Aug 26, 2016 19:42:34 GMT -5
An old lady was on an elevator. A beautiful young woman got in and boasted how expensive her perfume was. The old woman farted and said "Broccoli, four dollars a pound!"
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Post by sychobeetle on Aug 26, 2016 20:42:14 GMT -5
How do the French eat frogs?
They put one leg over one ear and the other leg over the other ear
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Phil Parent
El Dandy
Your Favourite Teacher
Posts: 8,508
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Post by Phil Parent on Aug 26, 2016 21:59:13 GMT -5
What's a fish that's missing an eye?
Fsh.
...............
Blame Abbot Francisco in DQ8.
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The Unconquered Sun
King Koopa
He has no pants! What a heathen!
Lord of Storms and Kittens!
Posts: 11,548
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Post by The Unconquered Sun on Oct 8, 2016 15:42:08 GMT -5
Why did Adele cross the road? So She could say "Hello From The Other Side!" I'll show myself out...
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Post by DASH 243✅ on Oct 8, 2016 17:32:13 GMT -5
A ham sandwich walks into a bar and orders a beer. Bartender says "sorry we don't serve food here"
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Goldenbane
Hank Scorpio
THE G.D. Goldenbane
Posts: 7,331
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Post by Goldenbane on Oct 8, 2016 18:41:04 GMT -5
A big Harley Davidson biker is sitting at a red light, when he hears this honking. He looks over, and it's a little old man sitting on a red motor scooter grinning at him. The old man gets in close to the biker and amazes at all the chrome, finish, and such. He's too close and kind of cramping the biker's style. "Wow, now young man, this has the be the prettiest bike I've seen in all my years! I'll bet it goes pretty fast!" The old man exclaims. "Soon as this light turns green, I'll show this old man just how fast my baby can go!" The biker thinks to himself. The light changes and the biker hits the gas, leaving the old man to choke on his dust. The biker is still chuckling about the encounter a little while later, when he notices a tiny red dot in his mirror. The dot gets bigger and bigger...and soon enough the biker realizes it's the little old man on his red scooter! The old man blazes right past the biker, to his amazement! Realizing now, he's got a race on his hands, the biker hits the gas again on his Harley and zooms after the old man, passing him once more. Sure enough, that dot appears in the mirror again and the biker knows the old man is coming! Panicking and afraid he'll be seen as a laughing stock if this geezer beats him, the biker tries to keep the old man from passing him. Sadly, there's a collision, and the two men wipe out into the side ditch. The biker gets up with a groan, unhurt. He sees the old man lying not far away...white as a sheet with eyes as big as saucers. Rushing over to him, the biker looks to make sure he's okay, and says "Old man, you've got to be the gutsiest codger I've ever seen in my life, racing like that! Are you alright, is there anything I can do for you?"
The old man looks up at the biker and nods his head. "Yes sir, young feller...could you untangle my suspenders from your handle bars?"
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the2ndevil
Grimlock
Super Seducer Survivor
Where Is Your Santa, Now?
Posts: 13,629
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Post by the2ndevil on Oct 28, 2016 21:17:11 GMT -5
What city do ghosts love to go to on vacation?
Boo-Dapest.
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