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Post by DASH 243✅ on Oct 29, 2016 0:30:48 GMT -5
What do a walrus and Tupperware have in common?
There both looking for a tight seal
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Post by bibboid on Oct 29, 2016 15:53:09 GMT -5
Why do I buy all my handguns from a Tyrannosaurus rex?
Because he is a small arms dealer.
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Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
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Post by Deleted on Nov 4, 2016 12:00:43 GMT -5
What was Darth Vader's favorite Apple product? The iPod Nanooooo!
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Post by DASH 243✅ on Nov 4, 2016 18:36:50 GMT -5
A man went to a zoo All they had to exhibit was a dog It was a shih tzu
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Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
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Post by Deleted on Nov 4, 2016 20:19:42 GMT -5
Santa's favorite thing to do with Mrs. Claus is Netfix and Chi. It's like Netflix and Chill, but with Noel.
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Post by The 1Watcher Experience on Nov 5, 2016 1:07:31 GMT -5
Someone stole all the toilets from the police station. They had nothing to go on.
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Gecko
Grimlock
FAN Pyrite Member. Muahahaha
Posts: 13,244
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Post by Gecko on Nov 25, 2016 12:43:02 GMT -5
Three old ladies were sitting on a park bench when a man ran up to them and exposed himself. 2 of them had a stroke but the third couldn't reach.
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Post by Hugh Mungus on Nov 25, 2016 12:45:44 GMT -5
Yes, it's been done to death already:
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Post by taker1990 on Nov 25, 2016 15:08:13 GMT -5
What kind of tour bus does Willie Nelson and his band travel in?
A Cannabus
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Post by DASH 243✅ on Nov 25, 2016 19:31:11 GMT -5
Panda walks into a bar says to the bartender I'll have a rum ...............and coke Bartender says sure thing but what's up with the big pause? Panda holds up his hands and says "I was born with them "
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Post by The 1Watcher Experience on Nov 26, 2016 7:14:15 GMT -5
Q: What was tigger doing in the toilet? A: Looking for pooh.
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Post by "American Cream" Dusty Loads on Nov 26, 2016 7:42:37 GMT -5
Why'd the chicken kill itself? To get to the other side.
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The Sam
El Dandy
The Brainiest Sam of all
Posts: 8,423
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Post by The Sam on Nov 27, 2016 3:53:19 GMT -5
How many Elephants can you fit in a Volkswagen? 6. 2 in the front. 3 in the back and 1 in the trunk.
How do you know if an Elephant has been in your fridge? There's Elephant prints in the the butter.
How do you know if 6 Elephants have been in your fridge? There's Volkswagen tire tracks in the butter.
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Glitch
King Koopa
Not Going To Die; Childs, we're goin' out to give Blair the test. If he tries to make it back here and we're not with him... burn him.
Watching you.
Posts: 12,714
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Post by Glitch on Nov 27, 2016 6:07:36 GMT -5
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Braden Walker.
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The Unconquered Sun
King Koopa
He has no pants! What a heathen!
Lord of Storms and Kittens!
Posts: 11,548
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Post by The Unconquered Sun on Dec 2, 2016 8:32:56 GMT -5
Billy Bob and Joe Bob were out hunting when they came up to a farmer's property. "Hey, Joe Bob, ask him if we can hunt here," said Billy Bob. Joe Bob went up to the house and met with the farmer. "Well sir," said the farmer, "you can hunt here, but I need a favor first. See that obsolete mule over there, that's Old Buck, and he's seen better days. He needs to be put out of his misery and I don't have the heart to do it myself. If you'd be so kind as to put him down for me, you and your buddy can hunt here." Joe Bob agreed, thanked the farmer and went back to Billy Bob. But on the way back, Joe Bob got an idea to play a trick on Billy Bob. "That crusty old son of a bitch," fumed Joe Bob to Billy Bob. "He said no, you believe that? He said no and to get off of his property. Well, I'm gonna show him. See that old mule over there? Watch this". Right in front of Billy Bob, he pulled out his rifle, took careful aim at Old Buck and pulled the trigger. Old Buck went down. As he turned to Billy Bob, Joe Bob to his horror saw his buddy aiming his rifle. BLAM!BLAM!BLAM! "I just got 3 of his prize winning Arabian Stallions! Let's go!"
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Post by taker1990 on Dec 2, 2016 11:47:37 GMT -5
How do you find Will Smith in the snow?
Follow the fresh prints.
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Perd
Patti Mayonnaise
Leslie needs to butt out for fear of receiving The Bunghole Buster
Posts: 31,943
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Post by Perd on Dec 2, 2016 11:53:16 GMT -5
What do you get when you mix human DNA with goat DNA? You get kicked out of the petting zoo.
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Post by DASH 243✅ on Dec 2, 2016 18:40:57 GMT -5
What do you call a nerdy killer whale? A dorkas
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ERON
Hank Scorpio
Posts: 6,773
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Post by ERON on Dec 2, 2016 19:47:00 GMT -5
A guy went to the doctor for a physical. The doctor said, "Do you know you have a screw in your navel?" The guy replied, "Doesn't everybody?" The doctor told him, "No, that's not normal. Would you like me to remove it for you?" The guy nodded, and the doctor got a screwdriver and took out the screw. But as soon as the screw was removed, the guy's ass fell off.
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Push R Truth
Patti Mayonnaise
Unique and Special Snowflake, and a pants-less heathen.
Perpetually Constipated
Posts: 39,277
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Post by Push R Truth on Dec 2, 2016 19:51:46 GMT -5
What do you call a cow with no legs
Ground Beef
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