Chainsaw
T
A very BAD man.
It is what it is
Posts: 90,480
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Post by Chainsaw on Feb 2, 2017 5:45:44 GMT -5
I CAN'T SEE THROUGH METAL, KENT!!! Arnie Pye has some of the best lines. "You mean is your giant CASTLE okay, Kent?!" I also love the joke of calling his segment Arnie In The Sky, proving once again how terrible of a station Channel 6 is.
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Post by EvenBaldobombHasAJob on Feb 2, 2017 6:44:49 GMT -5
"AAAAAAAAAAAAH! SOMEONE IS THREATENING TO KILL ME!... oh wait, this is for Bart".
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Ben Wyatt
Crow T. Robot
Are You Gonna Go My Way?
I don't get it. At all. It's kind of a small horse, I mean what am I missing? Am I crazy?
Posts: 41,482
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Post by Ben Wyatt on Feb 2, 2017 7:25:16 GMT -5
Artie Ziff: Doesn't your father ever read to you? Lisa: He tried once, but he got confused and thought the book was real. He's still searching for that chocolate factory. It consumes him.
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Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
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Post by Deleted on Feb 2, 2017 8:18:35 GMT -5
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Post by EoE: Well There's Your Problem on Feb 2, 2017 8:20:08 GMT -5
I CAN'T SEE THROUGH METAL, KENT!!! Arnie Pye has some of the best lines. "You mean is your giant CASTLE okay, Kent?!" I also love the joke of calling his segment Arnie In The Sky, proving once again how terrible of a station Channel 6 is. I love the running commentary he does leading up to the metal quote... "His legs are dangling in a comical fashion, oh it's the saddest thing I've ever seen!"
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Chainsaw
T
A very BAD man.
It is what it is
Posts: 90,480
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Post by Chainsaw on Feb 2, 2017 8:59:21 GMT -5
Artie Ziff: Doesn't your father ever read to you? Lisa: He tried once, but he got confused and thought the book was real. He's still searching for that chocolate factory. It consumes him.
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Post by A Platypus Rave on Feb 2, 2017 9:15:04 GMT -5
I CAN'T SEE THROUGH METAL, KENT!!! Arnie Pye has some of the best lines. "You mean is your giant CASTLE okay, Kent?!" I also love the joke of calling his segment Arnie In The Sky, proving once again how terrible of a station Channel 6 is. And how am I supposed to do that? Do I have a magic lens that can see into people's souls? Well, yours would be black, Kent-- BLACK AS THE ACE OF SPADES!
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Post by Porky's Butthole on Feb 2, 2017 14:13:22 GMT -5
Not a line, but Homer's ring robe reading "opponent" always f***ing killed me.
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Push R Truth
Patti Mayonnaise
Unique and Special Snowflake, and a pants-less heathen.
Perpetually Constipated
Posts: 39,279
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Post by Push R Truth on Feb 2, 2017 14:50:14 GMT -5
It's like he ripped this straight from my brain
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Post by "Gizzark" Mike Wronglevenay on Feb 2, 2017 17:43:20 GMT -5
This thing is worse than Godfather III.
Whoa, let's not say things we can't take back.
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The Sam
El Dandy
The Brainiest Sam of all
Posts: 8,423
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Post by The Sam on Feb 2, 2017 17:55:31 GMT -5
It takes two to lie, one to lie and one to listen.
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Cranjis McBasketball
Crow T. Robot
Knew what the hell that thing was supposed to be
Peace Love and Nothing But
Posts: 41,891
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Post by Cranjis McBasketball on Feb 2, 2017 18:35:41 GMT -5
Don't worry! Being eaten by a crocodile is just like falling asleep...in a giant blender.
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Post by Wolf Hawkfield no1 NZ poster on Feb 2, 2017 22:18:16 GMT -5
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agent817
Fry's dog Seymour
Doesn't Know Whose Ring It Is
Posts: 21,159
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Post by agent817 on Feb 2, 2017 22:38:56 GMT -5
Pretty much this entire scene:
Hutz: Mr. Mayor, is it true you rigged the election? Bob: No, I did not. Hutz: [pause] Kids, help. [the judge shrugs] Bob: Oh, I don't mind. We want these children to feel justice has been served. That way they can sleep soundly tonight on their hard, feculent motel pillows. -- I'd have preferred the term, "Unsoft, somewhat rotten motel head rests", "Sideshow Bob Roberts"
Bob: Well Bart, Lisa...here I am. Lisa: I have a plan. I think we can trap him. [they walk up; Lisa takes a sip of water] You know, Sideshow Bob, I believe you when you say you're innocent. Bob: Indeed I am. Lisa: Because we all know you're a naive pawn -- puppet, if you will -- of the most diabolical political genius Springfield has ever known: Birchibald T. Barlow! [Barlow stammers incoherently] You don't have the intelligence to rig an election by yourself, do you? Bart: You were just Barlow's lackey. Lisa: You were Ronny to his Nancy! Bart: Sonny to his Cher! Lisa: Ringo to his rest of the Beatles! -- Ringo "Excuse the lateness of my reply"?, "Sideshow Bob Roberts"
Bob can't stand it any longer.
Bob: Enough! Lies, lies, lies! I did it! I did it all! [everyone gasps] There. Is that what you want you smarmy little bastards? Bart: We want the truth! Bob: You want the truth? You can't handle the truth. No truth- handler, you. Bah! I deride your truth-handling abilities. Judge: Will you get to the point? -- "Sideshow Bob Roberts"
Bob: Only _I_ could have executed such a masterpiece of electoral fraud. And I have the records to prove it! Here, just look at these -- [pulls out binders and floppy disks] each one a work of Machiavellian art. Judge: But why? Bob: Because you _need_ me, Springfield. Your guilty conscience may force you to vote Democratic, but deep down inside you secretly long for a cold-hearted Republican to lower taxes, brutalize criminals, and rule you like a king. That's why I did this: to protect you from yourselves. Now if you'll excuse me, I have a city to run. Judge: Bailiffs, place the mayor under arrest. Bob: What? Oh yes, all that stuff I did.
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DragonMasterP
King Koopa
Wait, I turned 30? How'd that happen?
Posts: 11,986
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Post by DragonMasterP on Feb 2, 2017 22:41:01 GMT -5
"The dolls' trying to kill me and the toasters' been laughing at me! Eww, dog water!"
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Post by Starshine on Feb 2, 2017 23:05:21 GMT -5
Basically all of Lionel Hutz's lines from Marge in Chains. Most people remember the running over Judge Snyder's son line, but there's also this one.
Lionel Hutz: And so ladies and gentlemen of the jury. I rest my case. Judge Snyder: Hmm. Mr Hutz. Do you realize you're not wearing any pants? Lionel Hutz: I... Ahh! [David Crosby shakes his head in shame] Lionel Hutz: I move for a 'bad court thingy'. Judge Snyder: You mean a *mistrial?* Lionel Hutz: Yeah! That's why you're the 'judge' and I'm the 'law talking guy?' Judge Snyder: The *lawyer?* Lionel Hutz: Right.
In general, Lionel Hutz never fails to make me laugh.
Lionel Hutz: And as for your case, don't you worry. I've argued in front of every judge in the state. Often as a lawyer.
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The Sam
El Dandy
The Brainiest Sam of all
Posts: 8,423
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Post by The Sam on Feb 2, 2017 23:07:59 GMT -5
Juggling a career and a family like so many balls. Two I suppose.
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Post by Citizen Snips Has Left on Feb 2, 2017 23:15:58 GMT -5
Marge: Try to be nice to my sisters. It's very hard on me to have you fighting all the time. Homer: Oh, OK Marge, I'll get along with them. Then, I will hug some snakes! Yes, I will hug and kiss some poisonous *snakes*! [pause] Homer: Now that's sarcasm.
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Post by "Gizzark" Mike Wronglevenay on Feb 3, 2017 7:32:17 GMT -5
"The dolls' trying to kill me and the toasters' been laughing at me! Eww, dog water!" This toaster line always slays me because it's so completely random and makes him both sane and insane simultaneously.
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Post by Zaq "That Guy" Buzzkill on Feb 3, 2017 9:53:09 GMT -5
"Dear Edna, a Crocodile bit off my face."
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