Pokémon Ruby Nuzlocke - FINALE

[SsnakeBite, the No1 Frenchman]

Hello everyone! Time for a new Let's Play and something a little bit different this time: a Nuzlocke challenge! I actually had little interest in Nuzlockes until recently when I watched ProJared's playthroughs which I actually found very fun and made me wonder if I could pull it off. Now, on the off chance that some of you don't know what a Nuzlocke is, it's a self-imposed challenge when playing Pokémon where you have to follow certain sets of rules, of which the most basic ones are this:


- If a Pokémon faints, they are considered dead and must be released as soon as possible. It is not allowed to revive them in any way;

- You may only catch the first Pokémon you find in a new area and after the fight, regardless of whether you succeeded in capturing it or not, you may not catch any other Pokémon in that area. EVER;


A lot of people also play under variations of the challenge and I will as well (especially since these variations are, from what I understand, used by almost everybody):


- If I white out (i.e., every pokémon in my team is killed) or if I end up stuck because I cannot have any pokémon that can use a field move required to progress, it's Game Over, even if there are pokémons left in the PC;

- I will use the duplicate clause, meaning that Nuzlocke rules only apply to pokémons I haven't caught yet (although obviously I can't capture a pokémon I caught before);

- The same applies to evolutions of pokémons I already have found in the wild. The idea is that should my original pokémon evolve, I would end up with duplicates, thus breaking the duplicate clause;

- The challenge only begins once I am able to catch pokémons. This means that Nuzlocke rules don't apply until I get Poké Balls;


I may add some more rules if the need arises during the playthrough. I have previously done another Nuzlocke, of the original Blue version. It actually went really well at first... and then things started going downhill and soon after a particularly painful fight to win the eighth badge, I made my way towards the Indigo Plateau, hoping to grind before the Elite Four, except I forgot that the rival was in the way and he was the final nail in my team's coffin. So frustrating to lose just before the final challenge.

As the title suggests, for this run, I am playing the Ruby version, the main reason being it's the gen I am the least familiar with so there will be more surprises for me and I will have to adjust my strategy without knowing what to expect in advance. As a result of that, I highly encourage you to give me tips regarding gameplay, but PLEASE NO SPOILERS.

I am also going to play the French version because... well, you know... I'm French. Plus I think it'll be fun for you guys to discover the French names of the Pokémons. Oh and, this being a Nuzlocke, I probably won't focus a lot on the story during this LP or describe every fight against trainers, instead giving more updates on the team and reacting to specific events.

And now, without any further adieu...

Let's play Pokémon Rubis Nuzlocke! - Part 1: The beginning of something beautiful

So we begin with Professor JonTron here (who is actually called Seko) who gives us the usual speech about pokémon and how he's researching them and blah blah blah. We all know this, right? Skipping ahead. I'm gonna pick the girl character because I like her sprite better and the boy has white hair despite being, like, 15, which is weird. I'm gonna call her Nuzlock because I'm creative like that and there isn't enough room for the E.

I arrive at my new home called Bourg-en-sol. I set the clock, get the usual potion from the PC, then I go back down,w here my mom tells me to come check the TV because there's a chance we might see my dad. Don't be ridiculous, mom. Dads don't exist in Pokémon. But in all honesty, it's actually interesting as this scene implies that my dad is a gym champion, so I'll probably have to face him eventually.

I go to Seko's house where I meet his son, who will be our rival for this game. His name is Brice and he's like "Want me to catch you a Pokémon? Oh wait! I've got to help my father catch wild ones!". Man, what a show-off. Well, nothing else to do now than to try and go find them and rather than the usual thing of the professor stopping us to tell us we're dumbasses for endangering ourselves by going into the wild alone, it turns out Seko is the one in danger, being chased by a Medhyena.

He dropped his bag and tells us to use one of the Pokémon inside to help him. This is where we get to pick our starter. I'm gonna use the tradition Nuzlocke mthod here of picking it based on the last number of my ID number, which is 48007, meaning that I have to use the Water type, Gobou:



He has murder in his eyes.


I beat the Medhyena after a thrilling battle of tackles. We go to the lab where Seko decides to let me keep the Pokémon as a reward. As per Nuzlocke tradition, and because it's more fun, I shall nickname every Pokémon I get. Partially because it makes them feel more unique, partially because it makes it feel more personal when they die and partially because it's just more fun. I'll try and fail to be clever about it as much as possible and if all else fails, I'll use the ProJared method of making random sounds and picking whatever sounds decent. And in fact, that's what I'm going to do right now, so my first Pokémon shall be named... Sacolne. I can tell it hates me already.

Seko then suggests going to meet his son on Route 103.



Heh... pass.


But of course we've got a "but thou must!" situation going on so off we go!. I try to avoid tall grass as much as possible for the time being and I quickly arrive at the next town, Rosyere , where someone working at the shop gives me another potion. I go to the store... but of course, I can't buy poké balls yet because we need to have the tutorial on that. Really wish these games asked you at the beginning if you've played Pokémon before so seasoned players can skip that nonsense.

I find the son and as you may have expected, he challenges me and also as you may have expected, he has the Grass-type Arcko:




After another exciting tackle fight, I win and Sacolne gains no less than two levels and learns Coud'Boue (Mud Slap). After that, he tells me to go back to the lab. Once there, Seko gives me a Pokédex so I can do his job with no compensation! Yay! And his son gives me Poké Balls, which sounds like an STD but isn't. And this also means...

NUZLOCKE MODE ACTIVE

I go kiss my mom goodby and she gives me running shoes. Why these games don't just allow you to run from the get-go, I will never understand. And finally, it's time go on our journey! I meet my first pokémon on Route 101 and it is (Please don't be a Rattata! Please don't be a Rattata! Please don't be a Rattata!)...



Hurray for not a Rattata!


It's a Zigzaton! Aw, it looks so cute! I do want it! No surprise, I catch it and I'm gonna call her... Ziggy. Man, I am am really pulling out all the stops here. She's obviously our traditional early Normal-type but hey, at least it's not a bloody Rattata or a Zubat. Urgh, there's going to be Zubats, isn't there?Her skill is "ramassage" which allows her to pick up items. Oooh! That sounds very useful. And she has a "shy" nature.

Well, with my first Pokémon caught, I call it a day and train her and Sacolne in preparation for the next part. WOOHOO! Nuzlocke playthrough, baby! Let's do this!

[Deleted]

Good luck, I tried to do a nuzlocke on here years ago and lost interest around the second badge.
Ill be watching if I remember.

[SsnakeBite, the No1 Frenchman]

[

Part 2: Meet the Team

Alright, I grinded a bit so now, Sacolne is level 10 and has learned Pistolet à O (Water Gun, note that the "O" stands for "eau" but there isn't enough room for translators to fit in the whole name so they had to work around it) and Ziggy is level 8 and has learned Mimi-Queue (Tail Whip). My God, I can only use this power in case of emergency. By the way, I forgot to point it out last time but Sacolne's ability is "Torrent", which does not allow it to pirate software, but does increase the power of water attacks, and his nature is "docile". Full disclosure, to this day I still have no idea if natures actually influence anything. I also found out that Ziggy was holding a Super Potion the whole time! So yeah, good stuff all around.

I'm in Rozyere right now and I can go North or West. I'mma go West for now as I just kind of having a habit of always going left first in video games and then continuing clockwise. I arrive at Route 102. New area, means new Pokémon to catch, and it is...




Oh my God, I have no idea what this Tarsal is but it looks weird and cool and I want it. Man, every Pokémon in this game so far looks like something I want as a plushie. Easy catch, I'm gonna call her Patonia. Because its head looks like an army helmet and reminds me of Patton and it's a pun with the flower "petunia" because it also looks like a plant. See? I can come up with clever-ish names. I could work for Nintendo.

Anyway, she knows nothing but Rugissement (roar), making her a vital asset to my team. But all kidding aside, she's a Psychic type and I love those so I'm very happy tog et one this early. I'm surprised there even are any so soon after the beginning of the adventure. I'm getting the impression I lucked out and that those probably aren't the most common pokémon in the area, am I wrong?

Her ability is Calque (Imitate, I think?), which allows her to copy the opponent's ability and her nature is Relax, meaning she's going to trigger Liu Kang (and that, ladies and gentlemen, was my most obscure reference for this playthrough yet, but probably not the most obscure one to come).

While I'm at it, I'm gonna go check Route 103 and see what I can find there. I just want a full team ASAP.




A Medhyena! Look how doofy that motherf'er looks. ANother easy catch, I'm calling her Wolfgang because... well, isn't it obvious? She's a Dark type (man, doing really good on diversifying the team so far; I have no two pokémon which are the same type. Awesome!), it's special ability is Fuite (Flee) which... doesn't sound all that awesome, her nature is Hardi (Sturdy) and she only knows Charge (Tackle) so far.

And after a quick visit to the Poké Centre, let's go back to Route 102 and continue onwards. On the way, I find some berries. Right, take one, leave one, I know how this goes. Gotta say, I don't usually use berries very much but it might come in handy in a pinch, especially for a Nuzlocke. I also raise Patonia's level to 6 so she learns a proper attack, and indeed she learns Choc Mental (Confusion). Holy Crap! Already a Psychic-type attack AND one that can cause confusion as well! I expected her to learn Tackle first or something. Man, I am loving this team already!

By the way, my policy in this playthrough is going to be to try to have one Pokémon that's ahead of the group so that they can save the day in case we get into trouble, while the rest is at an about equal level. And needless to say, I'm going to grind like crazy.

But for now, I arrive at the next town, Clémenti-Ville (a reference to the fruit called clémentine, I assume). I go to shop to grab some antidotes and some more balls. There's a gym there but I'd rather wait for my pokémon to grow stronger before I attempt that so let's just move on... except of course, an NPC blocks my path and keep taking my to the gym whenever I try to go any further.



Dude, I've got four pokémon and none of them is in any shape to take on a champion.


Sigh, why do Pokémon games do that? I get roadblocks to make you go do some story stuff and make you earn the stuff you get later but don't just lock the player in right away at the first town just as we're getting a sense of excitement from exploring, discovering new pokémon and building up our team, give us some breathing room. Well, you know what that means... it's Grind Time!

Not that much of interest during that, although at some point, I ended up facing an enemy called Grainipiot, which cast Bide and...




OH WOW! That was waaayyyy too close for comfort! I'm so sorry, Wolfgang! I promise I'll be more careful in the future! So yeah, let that serve as a reminder to never take chances during a Nuzlocke as you never know when an enemy is going to suddenly pull a big move and I'm certain every player has stories of losing on of their favourite pokémon to a lucky crit from a Rattata. Man, f*** Rattatas.

After that grinding session (man, that sounds wrong), Sacolne is level 12 and everyone else is level 8. They're making pretty light work of wild pokémon so I'm gonna try the trainers in the gym to test the water. So I go there and...




... wait, WHAT?! My dad is the first champion we meet?! I would have thought for sure he'd be the last one. I got scared for a second that I'd have to battle here right here and there with a team I'm not 100% sure is ready, but instead, a kid called Timmy comes up and dad asks me to help him catch a pokémon. So I'm the one giving an NPC a tutorial for once? Gotta say, I'm loving how this game is shaking things up so far. Well... I say that but it ends up all being automated so it's pretty much the usual stuff. Weird that it'd come up after the game has already given us an opportunity to catch pokémons and go to a town with a gym.

Back at said gym, Timmy leaves and my dad tells me to go to Mérouville ("Mérou being French for the fish "grouper"). Interestingly, according to Wikipédia, there is actually a real French town called Mérouville, which currently boasts a whopping 221 inhabitants. He also tells me he'll fight me when I have 4 badges. Okay, so I don't need to face champion this early. Good.

I arrive at Route 104, meaning I get to catch another pokémon. And the lucky winner is...




Cool, I could use a Flying-type, and this one looks like it might be a water-type as well, although I already have one of those. By the way, this game so far does such a better job of letting us find more varied Pokémon when going to new areas than Gen 1, where I spent so much time finding seemingly nothing but Rattatas, Pidgeys and Spearows. Once again, another easy catch and I'm gonna call him... Vidom.

As expected, it is a Water/Flying-type. Its ability is "Regard vif" (don't know the English name but it translates as "piercing sight") which prevents perception loss. Very, very useful. Its nature is "docile" and it knows Roar and Water Gun. Also, checking his attacks list, I noticed that one of his PP is down. Does that mean that enemy pokémon actually use PP as well and can run out in this gen? If so, really nice to be on an even ground.

Going further, I arrive at a woods area called Bois Clémenti. Ah-ha! So Bug-types it is! Bug-types are so underappreciated, I really hope I can do something good with one of them during this playthrough. After a trainer battle where Vidom learns Ultrason (Supersonic), I get to hunting and find a...




Balignon! I remember getting one of those in another game and finding it a lot more useful than I expected so it's nice to see them again. And I guess that means I'm going with grass-type instead of bug. Oh well, no complaints. Since it's apparently supposed to be a mushroom, I catch it and call it Grumpignon, because it looks grumpy and it's a pun with the word "champignon", which means "mushroom" in French.

She's a Grass-type, her ability is "Pose Spore", which unleashes spore when the pokémon is touched. No idea if that means poison, paralysis or life-leeching but either way, good stuff. Her nature is Lax and she knows Vol-Vie (Leech Life) and Tackle.

And with that, I have a full team! I go further and meet some guy who asks me if I found a Balignon. No time to answer though as a Team Magma member attacks! Apparently, the guy is a scientist and Team MAgma wants to steal some papers he has.




I really like Team Magma's outfits, I really think it's one of the coolest-looking team uniforms yet. Anyway, he's only got a Madhyena so I'm not sure what he was hoping to accomplish. But hey, at least Grumpignon learned Para-spore, so she can paralyse pokémons now. The scientist gives me a Super Ball as thanks. Wow, seems early for that but okay, I'll take it.

The grunt mentioned that Team Magma is planning something in Mérouville so it looks like we're gonna see some more action very soon. So I'll be grinding a bit more and I'll see you there for the next part.

[SsnakeBite, the No1 Frenchman]

Part 3: Hitting the gym

Welcome back! As promised, I grinded (ground?) off-screen and so, Sacolne is no level 15, Vidom and Ziggy are level 12, Wolgang and Grumpignon are level 11 and Patonia is level 10. And of course, they have learned a lot of new moves. So let's get going!

We are still technically on Route 104 so I can't catch new pokémon. There is a flower shop where I get a berry as well as a watering can which helps grow berries. Later on, I come across a pair of twins. Surprisingly, they don't challenge me directly but I can talk to them for a battle. Normally I wouldn't really comment on random trainer battles unless something really important or funny happened but this is the first double battle of the playthrough so I thought I'd bring up that milestone.




Moving on, I arrive at Mérouville and it's a much bigger town than what we've seen so far as I immediately see large buildings. AMong them is a school which I thought for sure was going to be useless but I'm very glad I check it out anyway because I got a Quick Claw out of it! I'm giving it to Patonia as she has the lowest speed stat of the gorup and I think a Psychic-type being able to attack first will be very helpful.

The people in this town keep mentioning a company called Devon which seems to be the heart of this city (geesh, you just know it's going to become a wreck when that economic bubble bursts) but I can't visit their HQ right now. What I can visit is a house where I am given Cut! Inexplicably, Grumpignon the Grass-type cannot learn it yet Ziggy the Normal-type can. So I make Ziggy forget Growl (yeah, turns out I got confused earlier when I said it knew Roar) and learn that. And now, between Cut and picking up some very useful items, I really hope Ziggy doesn't die. Man, I just jinxed myself, didn't I?

I can't use the move outside of battles until I win the local badge though so needless to say, I'm off to challenge the champion, Roxanne, who uses Rock-type pokémon, which is great for me considering I have two Water-types AND a Grass-type in my team. This being the first arena we can compete in, it's of course a very basic one. Two trainers, no gimmick, I blitz through it and it's time for our first Champion battle!



I must break you.


She has a Racaillou (Geodude. The French name is portmanteau or "racaille", which means "thug" and "caillou" which means "pebble") and a freaking Tarinor (Nosepass). Grumpignon destroys them all on his own and gains a couple sweet levels as a result. Roxanne gives me the badge as well as Tomberoche (Rock Tomb)! Damn! I love that move. The only who can learn it for now is Sacolne but I'd rather teach it to a Rock-type so I'll hold on to it for now.

Just as I leave the gym, another Team Magma asshole runs by and the scientist guy is running after him, yelling his "pack" being stolen. Turns out he works for Devon and he asks me to get it back and sure, I've got nothing better to do.

I arrive on Route 116. New area! New pokémon! And the first one I meet is...




... disappointing! It really looks like just another generic bird and I already have a Flying-type, AND that oen is also Water-type. Boring! But hey, I'm still gonna capture it, you never know... except Grumpignon gets a critical and kills it in one move. Whoops. There goes my one chance for the area. I learn that the Magmasshole escaped into an underground tunnel. Come to think of it, you don't often have to actually chase someone through multiple areas in these games, do you? So that's interesting. I also learn he's stolen someone's pokémon as well. WHAT?! A team actually succeeding in stealing pokémons? You must be crazy!

And during a trainer battle, Sacolne reaches level 16, and you know what that means...




Awww yeah! He looks like a goddamn rock star! He learns Tir de Boue (Mud Shot), which damages the enemy AND makes them lose speed. Awesome! I get to the cave, named Tunnel Merazon. Great opportunity to catch a Rock-type, wouldn't you say?




OH IT'S A PUMB- yeah, that's old. I catch it and holy shit, according to the pokédex, it can scream so loud it can burst eardrums. I must only use this power for good, or to get discounts at the shop. I name her Spinaltap because she's clearly gone up to 11. Running back to the pokémon centre to check on her, I find that she is a normal type (dammit, I was hoping she would be at least part Rock-type), her ability is Anti-Bruit, which protects her from sound attacks and she has a Brave nature. She knows Ecras'Face (Pound) and Brouhaha (Uproar). Hm, I do like uproar and her ability could be useful but I really don't need another Normal-type. Sorry, Spinaltap, but you're staying in the box for now.

Back in the tunnel I go and I find the Magma guy and the pokémon he stole. Unfortunately for him, the pokémon won't obey so he's stuck fighting my team with his on Medhyena and much to my surprise, he actually kills all of them, ending the playthrough right there.

Oh wait, no, I beat his Medhyena in like two turns, and one of them was spent on switching pokémons. The thief runs away and according to him, the tunnel is a dead end. I assume this means I'll have to use Strength or Rock Smash later. The man whose pokémon he stole arrives. His name is Mr Marco and he turns out to be an old sailor who lives by the entrance to the Bois Clémenti (I did see a boat there).

I go back and the Devon scientist guy gives me another Super Ball for reclaiming his package (as the actress said to the bishop). He then takes me to Devon's HQ and asks me to do another job: take the package to a shipyard in the town of Poivressel (a portemanteau of "Poivre et sel", which literally means "pepper and salt" and usually refers to someone who has black hair with some grey streaks).

I then get to mean the president of Devon, who asks me to make at stop in Village Myokara on the way there. Okay, seriously, how much are you guys paying me because as far as I'm aware, I don't have the word "bitch" stamped on my forehead. He wants me to take a letter to one Pierre there. Interestingly, Pierre is Brock's French name (as Pierre means "Rock") so I wonder if he's making a cameo in this game or if it's just a coincidence. As payment, he give me a PokéNav, which is a fancy name for the map (about freaking we got one). Well, still better than "exposure".



Also, I just realized that this freaking is standing on his couch.


So we know where to go, which means I'm not going there because this is an RPG and I want to explore first!

Unfortunately, it turns out the only place left to see is Route 115... and I can't go very far into it and there is no grass or anything, so no new pokémon to catch. Guess we have to go see Marco. Bizarrely, on the way there, I find the boy character but he doesn't say anything useful. Typical boy, am I right, sisters?

On the way back, I take the opportunity to check something in the Bois Clémenti since there were some bushes I can now cut. I find an NPC who gives me a Grain Miracl, an item which increases the power of Grass moves. Giving that to Grumpignon.

Well, I'm in front of Marco's house and I think that's a good spot to end this part. See you later for more!

[SsnakeBite, the No1 Frenchman]

Part 4 : I'M ON A BOAT!

Time to go on a cruise! First up, Myokara. Gotta say, it's nice to have a way to travel across the sea before having Surf, even if ti's basically just a fancy fast-travel. Also nice is that an NPC gives me the Fishing Rod. Who's ready to get their Magikarp on up in this bitch?!




Aaaaw yeah! Now, I'm probably not gonna use it, at least not right away, because even if it becomes a Gyarados - or Léviator as we call them round here -, I already have Sacolne as a Water-Type, and it's also a Ground-type, but it's nice to have insurance just in case, so I'm very happy to have this Magicarpe...



... be accidentally killed by Patonia.



It's okay! It's okay! No biggie, I've got this. We have Chenal 106 right next to the village. That's a new area so I can try again there. And this time I do catch it and it's level 10 so that's actually a good thing that I didn't catch the first one. Its ability is "Glissade", which increases his speed when it's raining and it's nature is Docile. Take a wild guess at what his move set is. Also, I named him Worldeater, for that is what he is destined to do.

I know I have to deliver that letter but I can already access the local gym, so I'm gonna at least try the first trainer to see if my team is ready for it. The champ uses Fighting-type pokémon, which is candy to Patonia.




Ooooh ho ho, we're doing that, are we? ALright, so the idea is that I get a bit more light each time I beat a trainer. Fine by me, let's do this! First battle is against a girl with only one Méditikka (Meditite). I got a little bit afraid when it used Bide but thankfully, I had anticipated this and raised Petonia's evasion by using reflect and so she dodged it and finished Meditikka without any problem.

Since that went well, might as well continue. I easily dispatch the other trainers so you know what? Let's take on the champion right away! YOLO!



Seriously, how do people who only have two pokémon become champion?


He sends out Machoc first and Patonia defeats it fairly easily, although to the Machoc's credit, it did manage to take out half of her health, so when Bastien sends out a Makuhita, I switch to Grumpignon and I think that might have been the right call as his Pose Spores ability made him first make Makuhita fall asleep, then paralyse it after Bastien healed it. And I win my second badge!

With it, I can use Flash outside of battle and Bastien also gives me Gonflette, a technique tat raises a Pokémon's attack and defence at the same time. Hm, could be useful, I suppose, but I generally don't like leaving my pokémon open for a turn just to buff them, especially since the time you gain from the buff is wasted on casting it, so it seems pointless to me.

Man, this is going really well so far. 4 parts in and I already have my second badge. My team is showing no weakness, it's diverse and it's even made entirely of new Pokémon from that generation (or at least after Gen 1). Let's hope this trend continues as if my first Nuzlocke has taught me anything, it's that things can turn very quickly. But anyway, time to actually give that letter. Pierre is nowhere to be found in the village but there is a cave nearby and I presume he's in there. The place is called "Grotte Granite" and I'm hoping that this time we find some Rock-types.

A hiker gives me Flash, warning me that the next parts of the cave are dark. Both Patonia and Grumpignon can learn it. Hm, decisions, decisions. Well, I feel like Patonia is already very strong and from my experience, psychic types don't really need a lot of big attacks to make a difference, whereas I'd rather have the Grass-type have multiple attacks of said type, so I'm teaching it to Petonia. Now, time to find a new Pokémon.




* Squeeeeeeee! * Look at it! It looks so coooool! And I've actually used one of those in one of the later games and I remember liking him a lot so I definitely want that one. After a surprisingly tough battle that really showed how high its defence is, I capture it. According to the pokédex, its made of metal and even eats metal, so there is only one name Metal enough for him: Headbang.

Headbang is a Steel and Rock type, his ability is "fermeté", which prevents 1-hit K.O.s (VERY helpful during Nuzlockes) and his nature is "Soft". It knows Tackle, Armure (raises defence) and Mud Slap. I Absolutely want him in the team which means we'll have to put one of the current ones on the bench for now and as much as I like Ziggy and her constantly finding me good items, unfortunately, I'd rather have a Steel/Rock-type than a Normal-type so she'll have to take a vacation for the time being.

Well, I've got to go and I think that with a new badge and a new team member, we have actually done quite a lot despite this being a shorter part than usual. See y'all next time!

[SsnakeBite, the No1 Frenchman]

Part 5: Neither rain nor sleet nor hail, nor zombies, nor dead pokémon

Two badges and no sign of slowing down, let's go explore that cave! We've got a goddamn letter to deliver! Well... it certainly is a cave. You know how these go. Surprisingly few Zubats, I see some rocks I'll be able to smash later and I have to address this asshole:




Oh look at it! It's so cute with its fake mouth and tiny body and it looks like it's wearing a dress! Aaaww-NO. NO! This thing is NOT cute. It has crazy defence, it resist almost everyone in my team and it actually looked like Headbang was the one doing best against those, so I decided to let him try and take one out on his own, hoping to get him crazy experience and guess what?




MOTHERF'ER KILLED HEADBANG!! NNNNNnnooooooo!! My first death in this playthrough, just like that. I'm so sorry, Headbang! I should have switched you out! You had so much potential! Well... welcome back, Ziggy.

*sigh* In spite of this tragic event, we must move on so I go through the cave and meet Pierre, who isn't the one from Gen 1.




As thanks for bringing him the letter, he gives me the "Aile d'Acier" technique. As the name implies (it translates to "Steel Wing"), it is a Steel attack for winged Pokémon. I teach it to Vidom and make him forget Growl. Pierre then pisses off. Well, there is nothing left here for us in this accursed town of death and misery so let's go to Poivressel. Urgh, I really need to relax and build my team up again after los-




SOOOON OF A BIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIITCH!! Fighting is strong against Dark?! I didn't even know that! TWO!! I have seriously lost two pokémon today after such a great streak. Goddamn it. Poor Wolfgang. You were such a strong asset to the team too. That's it, come with me, Worldeater and let us purge this revolting World!! I don't even care that you're a Water-type and you become part-Flying-type later and I already have both of those. I just want to murder!

Also, I already have a Normal-type anyway.

And Worldeater's path of destruction begins with a cabin on the Poivressel beach where there a few trainers, the place acting like a sort of mini-gym (and ironically, being more of a challenge than the two gyms I've seen so far). As a reward for beating everyone, I get... SODA!! YUSSSS!! Poivressel itself is actually a really big town. Bigger than Mérouville in spite of not having as urban a look.

It also has an open-air market on top of the regular shop. There is also a thing for pokémon contest but frankly, it doesn't look all that interesting. Nearby is Route and darn it, I really need to catch a new pokémon as a pick-me-up after the shitshow that today has been so let's see what I can find.




Oooh, that's an Electric-type, isn't it?! Really could use one of those in the team! I catch it and name it Sorga. Her ability is "Paratonerre" with the description explaining that it means she "attracts electric attacks". I'm guessing that means it takes them instead of teammates in double battles. Her nature is Shy and she knows Tackle, Cage-éclair (which does no damage but paralyses the opponent), Groz'Yeux (lowers defence) and Growl. Hm... not sure if I should take her in...

You know what? I already have two Water-types, I don't need three. Worldeater, let's not actually destroy the world. Today. You're out and Sorga is in. There's a museum and Team Magma is queuing to get in. Surprising that they'd just quietly wait for their turn. In fact, one grunt even wonders why they don't just break in and steal whatever they want. You know, between this and the pathetic performances of the grunts we've seen before, I'm beginning to think that perhaps Team Magma isn't the most competent gang around.




But anyway, I've got a package to deliver so let's get to the shipyard, which I am told is ran by one Mr Poupe (French for "Stern"), which makes me giggle like a little boy because I'm immature. I find Archibald, the man I'm supposed to deliver the package to, but he wants me to give to Poupe directly, and Poupe isn't here right now. And whaddayaknow, we can enter the museum now!

As I enter, the first grunt I meet turns out to be one I already fought. He seems confused as he first gives me a technique as an apology, but then gets angry that I threw a wrench into their plans and says I'll pay for what I've done. Said technique is Larcin, which allows to steal an enemy pokémon's held item. Lame. And the rest of the team is seriously just looking at the exhibits. That has got to be the most well-behaved gang yet. I find Poupe upstairs but of course, just as I'm about to give him the package...



"Heh heh heh, check it! We'll be taking this gear!"


Team Magma attacks! Once again, the first guy has only one pokémon and it's a Water-type so Sacolne defeats it in one move. The second guy has a whole two pokémon, one of which is a Zubat! Woohoo. Truly they're pulling all the stops. Shock of shock, I beat the Polite Brigade (well frankly, at this point is IS a shock that none of my pokémon died). Their leader, called Max, finally shows up. Alright, Max, come at me! I'm ready for a fight! ... aaand he just leaves me with a warning. Man, these guys are barely an inconvenience, are they?

He also tells me that their goal is to extend land to the entire world. Okay first, that's dumb. We do need water for this whole "remaining alive" thing and second, you ain't gonna get close to pulling this off anytime soon if you guys keep half-assing it like that, are ya, lads? I finally hand the package over to Poupe, and he leaves to go back to work on his submarine for an underwater expedition without giving me any kind of pay. Dick.

Oddly for such a big town, there is no gym here so we might as well leave. The only way I can go for now is back to Route 110. I arrive at a fork, I go either West or East, with a strange house called "Maison des Pièges" (House of Tricks). Interesting, I'll be checking that later and since to the West is a new route, I'd rather prepare for now and go East since it's the same Route and I'd like to train a little. But on my way, guess who I meet again?




I'm going to regret this, aren't I? Meeting the rival was never a good thing in my Blue Nuzlocke.




PATONIA WHHHHHHHHYYYYYYY?!! God-f'ing-dammit! She was one of my best ones! Psychic-types are so difficult to find!



Sorga, not you too!! Jesus Christ this part is a disaster. That's what I get for running my big mouth. I eventually beat this guy, but it came very close and for a moment, I could see the run ending right here as his Massko took very little damage while dealing a lot. He almost took out Grumpignon as well but thankfully I barely made it. Good Arceus. He at least give me the Cherch'Objet in compensation. It can be used to find hidden items.

Well, let that be a lesson to us of how cruel and fickle Nuzlockes can be. At any moment you can lose FOUR GODDAMN POKEMON ARE YOU KIDDING M- ahem, sorry. Emotions got the better of me. Welcome back, Worldeater and Spinaltap. Heh, just the thought that I actually named a pokémon "Spinatap" alleviates the pain a bit. But still, it's going to be difficult to move on...

So let's get to replacing those two again, huh? How 'bout dat?! ... and of course, Rout doesn't actually have any grass. Good. Perfect. Just what the doctor ordered. There's a bit of water but... y'know... already got three Water-types, as we keep saying. Back to Route 110, it remaisn the same one all the way to the next town, Lavandia. I don't care, I will not end this part until I get a new pokémon. So off I go to Route 117! ANd the first new pokémon I find is...




An old one but a good one! Mystherbe! If you've seen ProJared's Nuzlocke, you have a special respect for those. I catch it and name it Audrey because I like obvious references. It's a Grass/Poison-type, its ability is "Chlorophyle", which makes him faster in the sun and he has an Assured natured. It knows Vol-vie and Doux PArfum (Sweet Scent) which I can use outside of battle and I guess it attracts wild pokémon?

Well, I do already have a Grass-type but my dislike of Normal-types is stronger than my desire for a diverse team and since I found the daycare center, I sent Spinaltap there for now and I'm including Audrey in the team.

Phhhheeeeeewww!! That was... nightmare-inducing. Right, so evidently I need to grind so I'll be doing that and you can expect Worldeater to have evolved by the time I post the next part, where we'll check that Maison des Pièges and Lavandia.

[SsnakeBite, the No1 Frenchman]

And Vidom just died during a GRINDING SESSION.


F***.


ME.

[SsnakeBite, the No1 Frenchman]

Part 6

Alright! No more f***ing around! I have to make up for the trainwreck that was the last part. I have trained my team and everyone is at level 19 at the minimum. And I mean everyone because Spinaltap is back! I checked the daycare centre and he grew a whopping 11 levels! Amazing! I was expecting him to have gained like 3 levels tops! And as expected, Worldeater has grown into a strong, handsome Gyarados.

Now, let's explore that trick house!




I barely take one step that I am told that I am being watched, then the cup on that table shines for some reason. Checking, a voice asks how I knew they were hiding under the table. So who's that? A powerful trainer? A unique, sentient pokémon?



There are no words to describe how disappointed I am.


So this guy who looks like the main protagonist of "Don't Shit Your Pants" claims that he is the most mysterious man in all of Hoenn and that he is called the "Maître des Pièges" (Trick Master). Turns out there is more to this house than just this and we have to go through the scroll on the wall to take on the house's challenge. And then he... twirls out through the roof. Gotta say, Pokémon, you always were a bizarre franchise but this is just weird even by your standards.

So the first room has a bunch of small rooms called by bushes that can be cut. There are also trainers there with one of them explaining that he ended up there by accident and can't get out. Wait a minute... a reclusive guy who traps unsuspecting victims in a house full of puzzles and won't let the people there go unless they solve them, who introduces himself as a disembodied voice...




OH SHIT OH SHIT OH SHIT!! I have to get out of here! I knew the pokémon can die in a Nuzlocke but nobody told me anything about the trainers! So I make it out of the room and the sick, twisted bastard gives me a Rare Candy. Yeah, it's probably rare because it's made from the flesh of trainers who failed the puzzles. Hmmm... people. After that, he twirls out again and I can just leave.

Well... that happened. On to Lavandia. There, an NPC just hands me Eclate Roc (Rock Smash). Just like that. Boom. Imma teach it to Worldeater. Seems fitting. There's a bike shop and visiting it, the owner just gives me a bike for free! And he allows me to trade it for another one at any time!



Dude! I mean... I appreciate it but, like, it's not a very effective business model. Y'know?


The other unusual sight is the local casino. Gonna ignore it for now, maybe I'll play there off-screen but frankly, I'd rather get my pokémon the old-fashioned way. Just seems more in the spirit of a Nuzlocke. There's also an arena and there are two people in front of the entrance so let's see what's going on there. Oh, it's Timmy! He wants to compete in the gym to see how much he's improved and he challenges me to prove to his uncle that he can do it.

He still only has the a Tarsal and a Zigzaton, both of which Ziggy beats in two moves. Timmy takes this well:




And Ziggy celebrates her victory by evolving:




Hhaaa. Feels so nice to see a pokémon evolve after witnessing so much death and destruction last time. Timmy says he's going back to Vergazon. Checking the gym, it turns out it's an Electric-type arena. Great. Great great great. My two strongest pokémon are Water-type so that sounds brilliant for me. Also, the champion's name is Voltère, which I've got to admit is pretty clever. The gym has a basic puzzle where you have to press switches to deactive and reactivate electrified walls, it's rather easy to figure out. I get to Coltère and I love how in a world where most gym leaders look like J-Pop stars, this guy just looks like a dude:



Seriously, he dresses like my dad. And probably yours.


I took a big gamble hoping that in spite of him being part Water-type, Sacolne's Ground-type part would make him immune to electricity and... it paid off! That's actually what happens! Awesome! You guys are SO dead! And indeed, with his immunity, let alone his level advantage, the fight becomes trivially easy for Sacolne and I quickly beat Voltère. Well, at least I'm still doing good when it comes to gyms. The new badge allows me to use Eclate Roc outside of battle and he also gives me Onde de Choc (Shockwave), an Electric attack which never misses.

Awesome. Let's move on and since I already visited the next route last time, let's not bother pokémon-hunting and go straight to the next town, Vergazon (a portmanteau of "vert", which means "green", and "gazon", which means "lawn"). There really isn't anything of interest in the the town itself, although you go see Timmy if you really want to, but we can access the other end of the Tunnel Merazon and help complete it using Eclate Roc. An NPC who was working on it so he could reunite with his girlfriend is so thankful he gives me Strength! As in, the technique. And then they leave after she tells him to come rest in her house.

They're gonna bang. Aren't they?

Welp, I'm not getting any so let's cross the tunnel again since we can now smash more rocks and go to wild new places. Outside, I meet the scientist guy. As a reward for acting as their papergirl, he gives me a new type of poké-ball called Bis Ball, which will from now on will be in stores in Mérouville. Sweet! What does this new ball do?

Oh.

It helps capture pokémon I've already caught.

Welp, that would have already been useless in a normal game, but it's especially useless in a Nuzlocke. I got gypped. Also, turns out I was wrong and I can't actually progress further back there as I actually need Surf to keep going. So I'll go through the tunnel again and next time, we'll see where I can go. See ya!

[SsnakeBite, the No1 Frenchman]

Part 7: Awkward puberty

I'm hyped for some more Pokémon so let's continue! First of all, I have to mention something that happened off-screen while I was going back through the tunnel. Spinaltap evolved!




And what the f*** is that?! It's disgusting! It looks nothing like the basic pokémon. It looks like a hippo head that separated itself from the rest of the body and sprouted its own set of limbs. Also, disturbingly enough, it kind of looks like an appalling racist caricature. Man, and people have a go at Jinx. Either way, I really hope it's like the Oddish line and there's a third, much nicer form because ew. Seriously though, how is that whenever people debate the worst pokémon designs, this one never comes up? It's just revolting.

Anyway, let's move on. turns out there was another exist to the tunnel on the Vergazon side that I missed before and it takes me to Rout 116. There, I meet an NPC who says he dropped his glasses despite his sprite clearly showing them on his face! Don't tell me it's a technical limitation, he's clearly lying!! Actually, the ones on the sprite look clear whereas using the Cherch'Objet, I find dark glasses, so obviously the answer is he wears sunglasses over his regular glasses, presumably to take them off dramatically when he sees something shocking, like Spinaltap's new form.

Or maybe not as he says that's not his glasses and then he leaves, saying that maybe his glasses aren't here.

... waaait a second, that was an intentional joke by the developers, wasn't it? That he's looking for his glasses when they're on his face. Okay, well played, Game Freak. Well played. Also, this may or may not be something I've actually done before in real life. Anyway, we can give it to a pokémon to hold so it raises the power of Dark moves and makes people whine about wearing sunglasses inside and/or at night.

Back to Lavandia, I go North on Route 111. There's a house whose owner offers a challenge where I have to face each member of his family of 4 one after the other. That does sound intriguing and a potential pool of experience but at the same time, I am still traumatized by the recent massacre I faced as I'd rather not take unnecessary risks. Some trainers battles occur after oen of which Audrey evolves!




Good lord, This is turning into the Disgusting Pokémon special. Can't keep going North due to a sand storm so let's go West to Route 112. New¨pokémon time!




A Chamallot! That's a Fire-type, isn't it? Oh man, I'd really like one of those, especially since we have yet to go through a Grass or Ice-type gym so it'll probably come in handy very soon. I catch it and name it Slowburn because pokédex says it's absurdly slow. It is indeed FIre-type but also Ground-type. Its ability is "benêt", which means it is immune to "attraction", whatever that is and it has a relaxed nature. Man, this pokémon is my spirit animal. It knows Growl, Tackle and "flammèche", a basic fire attack.

I hesitated between having her replace Spinaltap or Ziggy as both are solely Normal type. You see, Ziggy knows Cut and keeps finding useful items but unfortunately, she's not that strong in battle, unlike Spinaltap. I eventually settled on Ziggy so she'll be taking another vacation. And after another trainer battle, it's Grumpignon's turn to evolve!




Ah! Finally one that doesn't look absolutely abhorrent! It also learns Mach Punch, a Fighting-type move bizarrely, which always strikes first so it should be very useful. I have to make it forget a move and I'm going with Para-Spore since Grumpignon can paralyse enemies thanks to his ability anyway so that seems redundant.

More new pokémon! You see, on the way back to the last pokémon centre, I had to use Eclate Roc again, which spawned a Racaillou. And since this is on Route 111, I have to catch it or lose my chance for this area. So I do that and call it Sharon because it's a female and it's made of stone. HA! I'm so clever. Her ability is "Tête de roc"(Rock Head) which makes it impervious to recoil damage, she has a modest nature ANd knows Tackle, Boul'Armure (raises defence), Lance-Boue (weakens electricity) and Jet-Pierres (Rock Throw).

I kind of want it on the team because it's a Rock/Ground-type and the Geodude line is really good... but at the same time, I already have two part-Ground-type pokémon so I don't really want to take in a pokémon that is so under-levelled compared to the rest of the team if it doesn't really bring in as much diversity as it could. So she stays in the box for now.

Moving, I arrive at a volcano called Mont Chimnée (short for "cheminée" which means "chimney") and a cable car can take me straight to the top! But of course, Team Magma is blocking access to it. I suppose I could just have Worldeater eat them alive but apparently I'm not allowed to do that, so we'll have to take the long road.

I enter a cave area called "Chemin Ardent" (which means "scorching path") so there'll probably be some Fire-types here. Or maybe not considering how good I've been at predicting the type of the first pokémons I'd encounter in a new area so far. Well, I actually go through the short tunnel without encountering any new pokémon so this is irrelevant. I did find an area with a boulder but unfortunately, I need another badge before I can move it. I'm back on Route 112 so I suspect will be switching between that the Chemin Ardent until I reach the top.

Or not! Because it takes me back to the second half of Route 111 and I keep going North, so I guess we'll have to explore the volcano later. I meet an NPC who gives me the technique Force Cachée (Hidden Power) which I can apparently use to set up a secret base?!

DUDE!! That is AMAZING! I'm teaching that to Slowburn. I arrive on Route 113, which is covered in ashes. Let's see what I can find here!




A Spinda? No idea what that id but I'm gonna guess at Rock-type because it looks stoned, am I right?! Ah ha ha! High five! Come on! No? Okay... I've got nothing for its name so I'm gonna do the random sound thing and come up with Kopsit. Unfortunately, I am nowhere near any pokémon centre so I can't check if she's worth adding to the team or not.

I arrive at a house where some guy with a weird language tic tells me to gather ashes, after which he'll be able to make items for me, and he gives me a "sac à suie" (Ashes Bag). Well, I might actually look into that later but for now, I finally reach a new town, called Autequia. There, I see the second most shocking thing in this game since the main character actually having a dad:



Someone other than me using the computer?! Whatever next? This woman is called Annette and it turns out she's the one who created the software used for storing pokémon! She tells me to go see her at her house on Route 114. She leaves and I can finally check Sharon's stats. She's a Normal-type, her ability is Tempo Perso, which prevents confusion, her nature is Malin (Clever) and she knows Tackle, Brouhaha and Feinte (Feint). Well, suffice to say, there isn't enough room in my team for two Normal-types.

I'll end this part here so next time, we'll explore the town and presumably continue our way towards the top of Mont Chminée! Later!

[SsnakeBite, the No1 Frenchman]

Part 8

We now return to Pokémon Ruby Nuzlocke!

We're still in Autequia, which turns out to be a fairly generic small town. The only notable thing about it is an NPC who can apparently teach pokémon moves in exchange for an item called "écaillecoeur" (literally "heart scale" but with the space because there isn't enough room for all characters). So on to Route 114, where I immediately find a house owned by a guy known as the "Fossil Maniac", which sounds like the nickname the media would give to a particularly strange serial killer.




His little brother gives me Tunnel (Dig), which has always been one of my favourite techniques so that's nice. I teach it to Slowburn. Also, you may have noticed that there is a freaking hole in their wall. Let's check it out. I find the maniac inside but he won't give me any fossil. More like Fossil Dick, am I right? He tells me to go in the desert on Route 111 to find some. You know, the one I can't get to because of the sand storm. How come there's a desert over such a small area when everywhere else in the region seems to have perfectly normal environments, anyway?

Let's continue. Lots of water on this route and it looks like there might be some hidden areas that I'll be able to check when I have Surf. I arrive at a grassy area and you know the drill.



What the Hell? It's a bird with antenna hair and clouds for wings? Well, I catch it and the pokédex says its wings are actually made of cotton. Fair enough. I'm going to name it... Konfup. Sounds beautiful. It's a Normal/Flying-type because apparently we just cannot have enough of those in this franchise. His ability is "Médic Nature" and the description says, and I quote "Heals changing pokémon". I have no idea what that's supposed to mean. The best explaination I can find is that if you switch out a pokémon for it, the Tylton will heal the other pokémon? Anyway, it knows basic moves for the type, with the only unusual one being "berceuse", which puts the enemy pokémon to sleep. Sorry, Konfup but you just aren't good enough for the team.

Moving on, I arrive at Annette's house and it's full of stuff!




Look at that! Computers, books and boxes everywhere. SHe gives me something called "Poup.Grainipiot" ("Poup." in this case being short for "poupée", which means "doll"). A bit further down the road, I find a little dent that means I can setup a secret base there. Might as well check out how that works.




So I am shown this little cave and the game asks me if I want to make a secret base here. After I say yes, I can decorate and... that appears to be it. I assume that I can get some interesting stuff eventually but for now, all I have is that doll and I can't even place it anywhere because I don't have anything to put it on. One cool thing is that I can store everything in a computer so I can move the base elsewhere. Hm. I'd really like you guys to tell me if it's worth working for or if I can go ahead and ignore that, especially since the technique required to set one of these up takes up a pokémon's move slot.

Anyway, I arrive at another cave area, called "Site Météore". And for a cave, it is surprisingly bright:




This is also a new area, so let's hunt! And the first new pokémon I find is...




*sssssssssssssssssssssssssssiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiigh...*

Well, I managed to avoid it until now... I catch it and I call it Spam because that's exactly what these are. We all know Nosferapti, right? I don't think you need to tell me what it is what it can do so let's just immediately move on. Cool? Cool. Look! Team Magma is there. Oh no! They stole a meteor, which they want to take to Mont Chminée for some reason. But before we can throw down, out comes another challenger in the form of Team Aqua!



Their leader, Arthur, explains that they're trying to stop Team Magma. What's this? A good team in pokémon? Needless to say, their schtick is that they like water, meaning IGN hates them (there, got that out of the way). They go after Team Magma, warning them of their evildoings and how much they've hurt people. Really? These guys? I don't think you mean these guys. By the way, did these teams show up in multiple generations? I swear I've played another Pokémon game where the two teams were also present but the setup was completely different and both teams were evil.

I talk to the scientist they stole the meteor from. He is called Kosmos, because subtle (also, with the K, he really should be a Mortal Kombat kharacter). He just whines about the meteor. Well, frankly mate, if you couldn't stand up to freaking Team Magma, you kind of deserve what you get. I exit the cave and end up on Route 115. I go South which... just takes me back to Mérouville. And going all the way back to Route 112, I find that I can now access the cable-car. At the top, I find Team Aqua taking on Team Magma.



One's water themed, the other's earth-themed. And yet, they're still both using Medhyenas.


I climb up where Arthur is taking on three grunts at once and he tells me that MAgma is planning to make the volcano erupt using the power of the meteor! Okay, little bit of a step up from Team Magma, from hilarious incompetence to trying to get a volcano to destroy all life in the area. I go through a few mooks and finally face Max:



Behold my slicked-back mullet!


Alright, well he basically just has higher level version of the usual pokémon Team Magma has and considering how much of a challenge they've been so far, this should be trivially eas-




NNNNNOOOOOOO!! A lucky crit took out about half of Slowburn's life and then the Camerupt got to attack first, finishing her! Man, that sucks, I really liked Slowburn. Go avenge her, Spinaltap!




...



...



NNNOT AGAAAIIIIIINNNN!! Oh for crying out loud, don't tell me it's going to go like the last time I started losing pokémon. Poor Spinaltap, you were ugly as sin but you were still very good. Thankfully, Grumpignon arrives and saves the day as he usually does. Thank God I can always count on you, Grumpignon.





...



I forgot Nosferato knows Flying attacks.


...


You know, I thought I'd be angrier. Or maybe I'm so unbelievably enraged I've gone full circle. Just... f*** it, you know? I send out Worldeater, who finally puts an end to this debacle. Max runs away, Arthur arrives and thanks me for helping defeat Team Magma. I don't care. Half my team is dead. Again. This keeps happening. Why?!

Well, if it's going to be this way, I'm taking the meteor as compensation. I'm bringing Ziggy back as well as Sharon the Geodude and as much as it pains me to admit it, in terms of type diversity, the best choice to round out the team is Spam the Nosferapti. Jesus. Well, I'm gonna grind and next time, we'll keep exploring Mont Chminée.

Goddammit.

[SsnakeBite, the No1 Frenchman]

Just a heads up, it might take a couple days until the next part. I'm pretty busy ATM and it'll probably take a fair bit of time to re-build my team to a decent level.

[SsnakeBite, the No1 Frenchman]

Part 9: A beautiful birth

Welcome back to the endless spiralling disaster that is this Let's Play. Now that I'm a bit less busy, I can get back to this. Also, I did grind off-screen... but things didn't go as planned, and both Sharon and Worldeater died. Just amazing, two of my best Pokémon, gone. Just like that. So I brought back Konfup and it also occured to me that I never even met any pokémon on the Chemin Ardent, so I went there to get a new team member and got a Smogo (Koffing), so here is my current team:




I called the Smogo Uzinagaz, which is a portmanteau of the saying "usine à gaz" which translates to "gas factory" which sounds like something you'd call someone who farts a lot but actually refers to something that's unnecessarily big and complex for its payoff (much like a factory that would only produce toxic fumes without even creating anything useful out of it). That doesn't actually describe Smogos very well but I just wanted a gas-related name without going for the low-hanging fruits. Also, Smogos are pretty cool but it's a bit of a disappointment considering some of the stuff that was in there, especially since there were some Fire-types which would have made a nicer addition to the team than another Poison-type. Oh well.

Right, let's actually get to the game. First up, thanks to all the grinding I did, surely I now have enough ashes to get something.




Alright, so he can makes flutes of various colour as well as a chair and a desk. I'm guessing the chair and desk are just decoration for the secret bases. The flutes might have a practical use since they were used to wake up pokémon back in the days. I wonder if the colour indicates something to do with types though. I'm gonna get a yellow one in the hope that it will somehow help me get Electric-type pokémon. And even if that's not a thing, well, I just like yellow.

Well, turns out it cancels confusion. That's actually pretty darn good. I'm gonna have Audrey hold it for now. Good, glad to see there is actually a use for this, so I might come back here during grinding. And now, since we cleared the area of Team Magma's presence last time, let us continue our journey to the summit. I arrive at an area called "Sentier Sinuroc" ("sentier" means "path" and "sinuroc" is a portmanteau of "sinueux", meaning "twisted" and "roc" which I'm pretty sure you can figure out on your own what it means). Alright, what new pokémon does this area have to offer?




...


... I think the game is just taking the piss now. "Oh hey, Ssnakey, doing a Nuzlocke, are you? And your best pokémon are dead? See all those cool pokémon made of magma and rock? Well, you can't have them. Here's a pig Moogle on a spring". Oh and the pokédex mentions that if it ever stops bouncing, it will die of a heart attack. So it looks stupid, it sounds useless AND it's one of those pokémon with a weirdly disturbing backstory. Also, due to the way the area is designed, I can't even go back to a pokémon centre to check on it on the off chance that it's actually super useful. On the plus side, I'm calling it "Poogle" because as I alluded to earlier, it looks like a pig Moogle.

I keep going and I reach a new town called Vermilava. Now I can check on Poogle, who turns out to be a Psychic-type. Its ability protects it from the hot and the cold and it has a calm nature. And I've got to admit he's got some pretty good psychic moves. Okay Poogle, maybe I was too harsh on you and your stupid face; I'll give you a shot. Later, Spam!




Man, the place is just full of old people! It's also got hot springs and one of the old women there has an egg she wants me to take with me so it can hatch... but of course that means it'll take up a spot on my team. Man... I don't really want to have one pokémon lagging behind and have an only 5-pokémon team, but at the same time there's a chance it could be a really good pokémon. And although there's a gym here, I don't really want to take it on yet because I really don't think my team is ready, especially since it's a Fire-type gym so that's bad news for Audrey and Usinagaz. Fine, I'll take the stupid egg and go grind again until it hatches. Urgh.


* Much running around and murdering of wild pokémon later *


Ohmygod it's about to hatch! I'm so excited, I wonder what's going to come out!




I have no idea what this is but I love it! It's a Psychic-type, its ability prevents enemy pokémon from escaping, it has a "solo" nature and knows basic Normal attacks. Looking at it, I first assumed it would be a Water-type and it does know Splash so maybe it becomes part Water-type as it evolves? And my God, look how goddamn happy it looks! That's why I named her Happyteeth. Also, in order to preserve type diversity (and also because I realized I had no Flying-type in the team which would cause problems once I get Fly), I'm replacing Poogle with Konfup.

Well, Happyteeth is only level 5 so time for more grinding!


* More time passes*


Okay! Okay! This is really weird but it took ages for Happyteeth to learn anything new and suddenly at level 15 she learned four new moves! And still all of them are weird moves that don't directly cause damage. And THEN, it evolved!




What even is this pokémon? Oh and it's still only a Psychic-type. Wonder if it has a third form since it evolved at only level 15.


* Yet more grinding*


Alright, I have no idea if the teams is actually but f*** it! We need to make some progress! I'm going to cross my fingers that Sacolne can take the leader's team. I mean, he's level 31, he's done great against the regular trainers in the gym, I'm sure he can do it.




Hello, Adriane! ANd seriously, fourth gym and still the leaders only have three pokémon? Okay. So first, Adriane sends out two of those:




And Sacolne takes them both out in one move. And just as I'm beginning to think that I way overtrained for this, she sends out this bad boy:




And then things got more complicated. Sacolne still did a good job, don't get me wrong, but that Cartor manage to both paralyse and seduce Sacolne. I actually had to use healing items here or he would have been toast (in all fairness, Sacolne also caused Adriane to use one). I actually began to worry a bit as the rest of the team is at much lower levels and I wasn't sure they could take Cartor's very powerful attacks... which is when I remembered our newcomer Happyteeth.

You see, the great thing about Happyteeth is that she has an absurd amount of HP since she's been gaining 5 per level up so despite being one of the lowest levels members of team, she has more HP than anyone else. On top of that, she' has a move which deals twice as much damage as she took the previous turn and using this deadly combination of stats and skills, Happyteeth scored the win for the team! Hurray! And I didn't lose anyone for once! Double hurray!

I get the badges, I can now use Strength outside of battle and I also get a technique that deals a lot of damage but also lowers the user's special attack. Settling for shit like this is why you lost, Adriane.

Nice to see things go well for a change and I am especially happy that Happyteeth paid off. Winning us a badge right after joining is sure to secure your spot on the team, girl! And wow, we are now halfway towards meeting the Elite Four. As I leave the gym, Brice reappears:




He hands me an item called "Lunet.Sable" which allows me to finally visit that place with the stand storm. Nice. And remember what papa said early on? To go see him once we have four badges? Maybe we should go do that. And there's also that boulder in the Chemin Ardent we can now move. Lots of things to look forward to so I will be seeing you in part 10!

[SsnakeBite, the No1 Frenchman]

Part 10

Back for the 10 parts milestone! Off-screen, I grinded a little it (partly due to me also farming berries) and as I mentioned last time, a lot of things have opened up. First up, I am back in Clémenti-Ville so let's check on my dad's gym. The guy who's always there to give you a primer on each gym explains that the trainers here all use a variety of items.




He also explains that each door leads to a different room. To the left is the Speed room and to the right is the Accuracy room. Hm, speed can easily turn the tide of a battle and in a Nuzlocke, it can means death for a pokémon so I'd rather try the Accuracy one. The trainer there has only one pokémon, a Delcatty, and I beat it without much trouble. She tells me that to the left is the Defence room and to the right is the Restoration room. Well frankly, they both sound annoying but I think I can deal better with restoration, especially if I put Uzinagas first and use his poison to mitigate it.

I enter the room and... that cheeky son of a bitch actually taunts me about how frustrating it is when a trainer uses a healing item just as you're about to win. Oh yeah, the developers know what they're doing and they're toying with our emotions, the bastards. This guy also has only one pokémon and it's a... Linoone?! Piece of cake. The only one of those that's actually dangerous is Ziggy. Healing or not, I'll beat it in a matter of sec- JESUS CHRIST!!




I have no idea what that trainer did to make his Linoone so strong but do you see the number it did on my team? I ended up having to use a super potion of my own to prevent a catastrophe. In the end, I prevailed though and nobody had to die. Yay! He then tells me I can access the final room... the Critical room.


...


Ooooooh nnnoooooo...


I am so out of there! If a freaking Linoone nearly killed my pokémon, I'd rather not think of what is going to happen against high-level pokémon that can crit easy. Time to go check on that boulder on the Chemin Ardent! There isn't actually that much to it, there isn't a whole cave system or anything but I do find a technique called Toxik, which poisons the enemy with increasing damage. I teach that to Audrey since it's basically a more powerful and more accurate version of a move he already had. I also find a fire stone, which is nice but useless for now since I have no Fire-type.

Time to get to the area with the sandstorm. Note that as I enter it, I am still technically on route 111 which means I'm not allowed to capture a new pokémon. This is a shame because I do find a new one I hadn't come across before:




And this little bastard damn nearly killed Happyteeth! The problem is, it's got an ability that prevents switching out or fleeing, add to this that it also knows Sand-Attack and it made Happyteeth almost defenceless. Oh and did I mention that because of the sandstorm, Happyteeth took extra damage each turn? And yet, she still won in the end, but for the time being, I'm putting Audrey in front. Hopefully this will be an opportunity for him to gain levels.

I also come across this:




Those are two fossils. Glad to see those remained a Pokémon tradition. As always, I can only take one. The one on the left is called "Racine" (root) and the one on the right is called "Griffe" (claw). I'm guessing the Racine one will get me a Grass-type and the Claw one... I don't know. Hm, I do already have a Grass-type in Audrey, but he's also a Poison-type and only has one attack that does direct damage (the others, while useful, only inflict status effects) and he seems more likely to learn poison moves, so I could use a Grass-type... Ah, screw it, I'll take it.

I also find a technique called "Tempête de Sable" which causes a sandstorm for several turns. And that's it. Damn, I was really hoping for a new area. Guess that means we HAVE to take on my dad. BUT WAIT! Actually, I don't have to do that right away, because I would like to see Annette about the fossil we found. It seems likely she could bring it back to life because Pokémon science is insane. So let's go meet her.

... aaaand I was mistaken. Urgh. Welp, Let's go see Daddy dearest and hope my team can take the inevitable crits. Or maybe I won't. You see, before that, I decided to try the trainers I didn't face before so I could get a last bit of grinding before taking on the champ of dads and it turns out there is still another door I can take, this one themed after strength, which seems a lot more manageable, at least for a Nuzlocke, than criticals. My plan is to send out Happyteeth so she takes the big attacks and then strikes back with a 1-hit KO. Let's see how that goes:




Oh. Shit.


That was from a single attack, by the way. My pokémon with the highest HP. Taken out in one hit.

Okay. Okay. I can still do this. Don't panic. Happyteeth also had the lowest defence. I send out Usinagaz, who has the highest, and he fares a lot better, especially since he has a resistance against some of Mangriff's attacks. Dammit, if I'd known that earlier Happyteeth wouldn't have died! It's all my fault!! I'm so sorry, Happyteeth, we will never forget you! So yeah, after something like that, I'm not even gonna try the criticals one. I'm putting Poogle back in the team and now, it's time to finally take on my father.




Oh God.

Alright, here is what happened: I sent out Uzinagaz since I felt his high defence would be needed again. He managed to poison Monaflemit but then lost more than half his HP in damage, so I switched him out for Audrey, thinking that his life-sucking attack would make the difference, but he got 1-hit killed.

Well, my best bet now is to use Sacolne since he has an accuracy-reducing move, because powering through it just ain't gonna happen. Alright. This tactic works and it takes out both that guy and the next one. Only one left and it's... another Monaflemit. DAMMIT! Okay, you can do this Sacolne, just like last ti- oh no no no no no NO NO NO NO NO!!




WOOOOoooooooooooooo! That was TOO close! I heal Sacolne and continue the previous technique... until I run out of PP for it. Nevermind, I continue with other attacks, but then Monaflemit uses Rest and heals himself. Well I'm not about to give up. I keep relentlessly attacking him until he can no longer use Rest and eventually, my perseverance pays off as Sacolne gets the win!

I gain another badge and my pokémon can now use Surf outside of battle, which is weird considering I don't have Surf. He also says that Timmy's parents came by and that they'd like to give me something. Okay then. Before going to meet them, I bring Spam back into the team and I have to say, as much as it pains me to have lost Audrey, I really liked this gym. It's once to see one that feels like a genuine test of skills and requires forward planning rather than just being a weird obstacle-based gimmick. It makes you feel like you're actually earning your way to the champ.

Anyway, at Timmy's, his parents give me Surf! Guess that explains why the badge allowed me to use it outside battles. Unfortunately, only Sacolne and Ziggy can learn it and while it being a Water attack seems like it'd make it a perfect fit for Sacolne, I don't really want to make him forget any of the moves he knows so Ziggy will have to learn it, as uncomfortable as I am with making her an HM slave (especially since I had to maker her forget Sand Attack, which is always useful against some opponents). His mom also informs me that he left Vergazon without telling anyone, but it's cool because she's certain he'll be alright. She also asks me not to tell his father. Yeah, you're right, it'll be funnier if we keep it a surprise.

But anyway, since I've seen and done everything I set out to do, I'll call it a day and ask you to join me next time, where we'll see just what we can do now that we know Surf.

[SsnakeBite, the No1 Frenchman]

Part 11: Too much wate-AM I FUNNY YET?!

Welcome back! First things first, an update: Spam evolved off-screen. Good work, Spam! As I mentioned last time, I now have access to Surf, which further opens up the world. i didn't really mention it before but there are A LOT of watery areas so there's a lot to visit. I doubt I'll be able to check everything in one go, actually. First, still in Clémenti-Ville, there's already one such area to visit:




All there is there is a Rappel Max (Max Revive) which would be very useful if I wasn't doing a nuzlocke. Oh well, it'll make for some extra cash, then. There is another surfable area to the south-west of the town and it's a lot more useful to me as it takes me to a hidden Rare Candy! Brilliant! One bizarre thing though is that the Cherch'Objet didn't spot it. There is also an item called Huile (oil) which restores PP.

Lovely! First area we check and we already get some pretty cool stuff. I'm actually going to backtrack a bit as there is another surfable zone on Route 103 and according to the Pokénav, it connects to Poivressel. And that's all. it does, it's just a shortcut, although admittedly a useful one.

Next, I return to Route 104, where Marco lives because I know for a fact that his boat made us skip a lot of stuff during our journey to Myokara Village and then Poivressel and I really want to check it out. We surf to Chenal 105, an area I haven't been to before so it's new Pokémon time!




Holy shit, level 26 Tentacool?! Yes, please! They may be the Zubat of the seas but they're way more awesome in my book! I catch it and call it Aryujelly because I have no shame. Definitely bringing him into the team. And I know that for the sake of type variety, I should really store Usinagaz, but I feel like Spam, as his name implies, is really not a necessary addition. Anyway, Aryujelly's ability hurts the enemy when they drain his HP, which is an amazing ability too have, he has a Pudique (modest) nature and knows Ultrason (Supersonic), Constriction (Constrict), Acide and Bulle d'O (Bubble Beam). In other words, he is already awesome. And being such high level, I don't even need to make him grind! Yay, that makes a change!

Back to surfing on Chenal 105, I reach a couple small islands with trainers on it. But going to the north-west of that, I find this strange formation:




Hm, that smells like a secret. I really do hope I don't need Hidden Power to reveal it because I don't have any pokémon who has it now and I don't really want to make anyone on the team forget a move just for this. If I do need to use that technique, please tell me so in the thread and I'll check it out later with a replacement pokémon. Continuing, I get to Chenal 107, fight more trainers and eventually find this boat:




Let's check it out, shall we? According to the area title card, and also according to its dilapidated state, this is a shipwreck. And yet there's a child running around!




What the Hell?! What sick bastard leaves a child alone on a shipwreck with nothing more than a swim ring for protection?! Anyway, I'm leaving. Feels like there could be a Legendary in here so i want to wait for my team to get strong enough to catch it and I don't want to catch anything here before I return with a shitload of repels, plus my team is getting pretty beat up from the trainer fights so I really need to get to a pokémon centre. On the way there, more trainers fights make Sacolne reach level 36 and evolve!




Yeah! Look at that beast! And that means that one of my pokémon has finally made it to their third form! See, daddy?! I can take care of a pet! Not all of them die! I don't hurt everyone I lo-waaah! *sob*...

Ahem, back on track. I eventually reach Poivressel again, where there is more surfable area to the east. Unfortunately, there is also current that prevents me from proceeding further. So instead, I shall go back on land and go north, on Route 110, where there is a surfable area going under the bike path. Aaand... there is nothing there. But going slightly further north is another area with an item I've been eyeing for a while, which turns out to be a Rare Candy! Awesome!

Well, I'm gonna have to go so I'll stop here for now. I realize there wasn't much progress but I hope you enjoyed that nontehteless. Also, I'd really appreciate it if you guys could confirm or deny that I need Hidden Power for the (presumably) secret area and if there is a Legendary or at least special pokémon in the shipwreck. No spoilers, please, just tell me yes or no. Right, see you next time!

[SsnakeBite, the No1 Frenchman]

Part 12: surf's up

Back for more surfin', are ya? Don't mind if I do. Quick reminder, last time we were on Route 110. Let's go North and see what we can find.




I arrive at this area, which I haven't checked yet and as you can see, there is a small island there and considering the other ones I've found so far had cool stuff, I wonder what's on that one?




Son of a bitch. Well on the plus side, there is something very interesting to the east:




A cave. And inside I find... a small space with a large metallic door that prevents me from proceeding further. And that's it. And what's even weirder than this is that the title card for this area is "New Lavandia". Wait a second, with that plus the Team Magma sign, are they... are they planning on destroying Lavandia and replacing it with a new town in their image?! Holy shit!

Well, that took a turn for the disturbing real quick so let's, er... let's continue north, shall we? So I actually get to Lavandia. Hey, guys, loving how not destroyed your town is right now. Enjoy it while it lasts. Not that I know anything about that. So there's a beach to the east but I'm pretty sure that's where I actually need to go so before that, I'd like to keep going north as I know there are smaller watery areas to visit.

Remember that guy who wanted us to gauntlet fight his family? Yeah, still not doing that but there is a water area starting right in front of his house so let's give it a shot. I find a PV Plus, "PV" being the French term for "HP". Needless to say, that is excellent and I'm using it on Aryujelly since he has the lowest amount. Nothing else here so I continue north and follow the path to Autquia. I keep going west and arrive at this large water area, complete with waterfall.




And wow, what a disappointment! There is nothing at all here. Well, there is a tree on an island that I think can be made into a secret base but meh. On the plus side, I realized that I am an idiot and forgot that the Fossil Maniac lives in this area and I can hopefully have him bring my fossil to life. Aaaand he just tells me that Devon is doing research on reanimating fossils. You are just useless, ain't ya, Fossil Maniac? Also, why does the pokémon keep researching how to reanimate fossils when they've apparently had that technology available since at least Gen 1?

Anyway, let's g back to Lavandia and venture east. Before I reach the beach though, a random encounter makes Aryujelly reach level 30 and evolve!




Actually crossing the water takes surprisingly little time and I arrive at another beach where I am immediately gifted a Super Canne (Super Rod). Awesome. I keep going and meet Pierre again!




He literally just asks me if I'm keeping a diverse team and then pisses off. Doesn't even challenge me or anything. Well that was pointful. Right, so I am now on Route 118 and so I get to catch a new pokémon. Unfortunately, all the ones I found were ones I already caught so, nothing new for now. There's a fork in the road, one path going north and the other going east. There seems to be a lot of people to the north so let's go east, where I find a garden full of new berries! Amazing!



And let's not kid ourselves, the ones on the left are just straight-up dicks. And I do mean straight-up.


This is the garden of the Berries Master. What a strangely boastful title. I go see him and he gives me a shitload more berries. Might as well plant them right away. Since it's constantly raining in the area, I have no idea if I need to water them. Also, I can't actually go any further so I guess I'm going north after all. So going there, I find another rainy area with very tall grass:




I also see something moving inside it. I have no idea if it's a trainer or a pokémon. I shall tread carefully. Turns out those things are definitely people and they explain that they are the Copy Club, where they... copy whoever they see. Well, glad to see you guys are making the most of life. Anyway, let's keep goi-




WHOAAA!! What IS that thing?! It looks amazing! And it's presumably a Grass type, which I desperately need! Oh, I am so catching it. So I do and it only seems fitting that I call this guy Audrey II. I promise, if I catch another Grass-type, I'll stop the Little Pet Shop of Horror references. Hm, scouting ahead a little bit, it looks like there's still a lot of trainers. I'm afraid I'm gonna have to backtrack to the nearest town if I want to pick Audrey II up, plus my team is starting to get pretty beat up so I really need to get to a pokémon cent-




NO!!!! Oh God, what was I saying about needing to get to a pokémon centre really bad? Oh shit. Well, I guess at least now I know which pokémon I'm going to take out of the team. Sorry, Aryujelly! Ah man, of course me catching a pokémon without losing another one was too good to be true. Silver lining:turns out that Audrey II has two types and is part-Flying! His ability grants him a speed bonus when he's in the sun which, hm, is okay I guess but not immediately useful, his nature is Hardi and he knows some decent Normal-type moves (including one that can make the opponent flinch) and one Grass-type attack.

Going back to where I was, I go further and find another water area and surfing there takes me to secluded area with a trainer and some Zinc, which raises a pokémon's special defence. Cool. I go back to the main road and continue. There are more trainers there. Whatever, let's just dispose of them quic-




WHAT. What happened?! It's alevel 28 Chapignon! How does it have anything that can almost one-shot a level 30 Koffing?! Oh, f***, there goes another valuable asset to my team. I need to find another pokémon centre ASAP. But I'm so far from the last town, now, so I just wanna dash through this area and get to the next town...




... so OF COURSE Team Magma is trolling me in more ways than one! They have also invaded this massive building, a meteorological centre. Well, it's a science-y building... maybe I can get my pokémon healed somehow? Turns out that yes, I can thanks to a bed, which heals my pokémon because... JRPGs, am I right? There's also a PC so I can replace Usinagaz with Spam.

Tell you what, I feel like that's enough for now, especially since we suffered a net loss of one pokémon. At least I have a Grass-type again, I suppose. So I'll stop here and see you next tim where we'll see what Team Magma wants with this place.

[SsnakeBite, the No1 Frenchman]

Part 13: Going green

Welcome back to Pokémon Ruby Nuzlocke and welcome make to the weather institute! Yes, I looked up the English name in between parts. So, Team Magma has taken it over. Time to kick their ass again. But before that, small update as Spam evolved off-screen again! Guess that's just his thing.




That actually took me by surprise as I wasn't aware there was a third form in the Zubat line and look at him! He looks so cool! Can't believe that there is actually a member of that family that I'm actually excited to see. Anyway, let's focus on the task ahead. Going through the grunts, one of them announces that this institute apparently created a new type of pokémon based around weather and they're here to steal it! Gotta say, if that's true, I want it too! On an unrelated note, before I reach the actual members of the institute, I am challenged by this girl:




She looks so cool!! Seriously, I mentioned it before but I freaking love the Team Magma outfits, both the male and female ones and this one is the most awesome one yet. That's all I have to say about her, she's not particularly tough or anything, I just really love her costume. Say what you will about Team Magma but they certainly have fashion chances.

I save the day, again, and the scientists thank me by offering me a pokémon! ... except they won't just send it to the PC box so I have to store one, I guess. I'll store Konfup and am given a pokémon called Morpheo (I am sadly not given a chance to nickname it), who changes shape depending on the weather. So they really did create a pokémon, not even through cloning where they used another one as a basis or anything. That just keeps making the biology of pokémon more confusing. And apparently the institute has several of those.




It's a Normal-type, her nature is naive and interestingly, she knows Ice, Water and Fire-type attacks but only one that does direct damage so far. Hm... not super fond of holding on to another Normal-type, especially one that won't stay consistent, but it seems it can learn a white variety of move types so I guess that makes up for it being a plain old Normal-type. Alright, I'll keep her in the team for now and we'll see if she's worth it. Anyway, with Team Magma gone, let us continue to the east.

I cross the bridge, one path goes north, one goes south and I barely have time to make a couple steps north to check on what's ahead before Brice comes up on his bike:




And he challenges me. Just what I needed after a series of trainer battles (granted, I did heal in between but that's not relevant because shut up). He only has three not very strong pokémon so shock of shocks, I beat him easily. As a reward, he gives me Fly! Awesome, that'll be very handy. I do need the next town's badge to use it outside of battle though. I originally considered teaching it to Spam but I'm actually going to teach it to Audrey II since I intend to keep him as a main member of the team for longer and I actually find Fly extremely useful in battle.

Going south just takes me to a small path where I can reach a surfable area. Gonna check it out real quick. There isn't much to it other than a couple useful items: a hidden Protein and a Grass stone, which unfortunately I cannot use on any of my pokémon. Going back north, I quickly reach the next town, called Cimetronelle (a pun about "cime" which refers to the tip of tree and "citronelle", French for "lemon grass")




Check it out! The place is full of tree houses! My team has gained quite few levels lately so I think I can go ahead and take on the local gym directly... except an invisible wall is blocking the way. Seriously, there's just something invisible in the way of the gym. Okay. Also, while visiting one of the houses, an old lady supposedly tests my psychic powers or something by making me guess in which hand she's hiding a coin three times in a row. For my troubles, she gives me Force Cachée, which is the French name of... Hidden Power. Yyyeah, you know that thing I've been calling "Hidden Power" since the beginning of the Let's Play? Turns out it was actually SECRET Power. Completely different.

I kind of fear I need to use that to get to the gym and I really don't want to make any of my pokémon forget one of their moves just for this so I'm going to hope to Arceus that I can unlock something by going further, so on to Route 120. No new pokémon but I do meet with Pierre again. He does mention ivnisible objects and that he using a device on them, which makes me hopeful that I don't need to sacrifice a move for this. He says that rather than tell me how it works, he'll show me then asks me if my pokémon are ready for battle and waits for me to prepare if I say no.




What's this?! A trainer who actually asks if I want to battle before starting a fight?! Whatever next? I'll tell you what's next: Pierre using something called a Devon Scope on something that's in the way.

Wait.

Something in the way.

That requires me to fight.

Oh god please don't be a Snorlax! Please don't be a Snorlax! Please don't be a Snorlax! Please don't be a Snorlax! Please don't be a Snorlax!




It is not a Snorlax. Good. in fact, I have actually seen those before but never captured them. And since I haven't met any new pokémon in this area yet, it means I am allowed to catch it! I do and since its official name is Kecleon, I am nicknaming it Kecsquall. Pierre gives me the scope so I now have what I need to take on the gym.

So I do that and go inside. The champion is called Alizée and uses Flying-types. Okay, don't think any of my pokémon is weak to that and Flying-types are weak to Ice, and Morpheo has Ice moves so, should be easy enough. The gym itself barely has a gimmick. It's just turnstiles and the very basic puzzles they involve are borderline pointless. I make quick work of the trainers and get to the champion:



I'm making a citizen's arrest for crimes against fashion.


And at first, it seemed like I was going to steamroll through her team. I got a little bit worried when a critical forced me to switch out Morpheo, but it was still pretty easy... and then this asshole came up:




NNNNOOOOOO!! Spam! Just as you were growing on me!! My god, if Konflup gets this tough, I might have to keep it around because that bastard really hurt my team and honestly, I'm not entirely sure why. Well, I do know at least part of the reason why: it knows Séisme (Earthquake). Why a Flying-type knows that, I don't know. I had to cycle my entire team and use a bunch of healing items to win, and I don't care how cheap anyone considers spamming healing items in a Nuzlocke. I've got them, it's within the rules, it even makes sense in-universe that a trainer would do that. Bite me.

I get the badge as well as Aéropique, one of the moves that f***ed my team up so bad so I'm actually pretty happy to get that. Going back to the Pokémon centre reminded me that I didn't even check on Kecsquall. She's a Normal-type because we apparently just cannot have enough of those, her ability allows her to adapt to the enemy's type, her nature is "rigid", whatever that means. She does have good stats and knows a Psychic attack but it's not enough to justify bringing in another Normal-type.

Well, that's it for this part. We unfortunately say farewell to Spam but we must carry on so I'll see y'all for part 14.

[SsnakeBite, the No1 Frenchman]

Part 14

Welcome back! First things first, we have more off-screen evolutions! No, not Spam, this time. All she's evolving into these days is rot. Instead, it's Poogle:




And now, back on Route 120to continue our journey, sixth badge in hand. Only two more before the Elite Four, we're getting there! One thing I literally just noticed is that there is a surfable area here I didn't check before and would you look at that!




A hidden cave! I wonder what's in there. The place is called "Grotte Zénith". Hm, once again, feels like there might be a legendary or some other sort of unique pokémon in there and I don't want to blow my chances at catching it, so I will leave until I find more info on this area. I might do a special part where I visit those unusual locations like this, the shipwreck and that strange island on Chenal 105. By the way, if you guys know what it is and think it's worth visiting ASAP, feel free to say so in the thread; just please try to not to be get overly spoilery.

Let us continue. I proceed south, fighting trainers along the way and I arrive at a fork. I can go east or west. Let's try west first. Not much of interest; more trainers, berries, a healing item but one NPC does mention something interesting: some ancient ruins that are rumoured to be hosting a rare pokémon. Hm, could it be that cave? Well, probably not because after beating him, he mentions that the entrance is supposed to be in the giant rock next to us, and yet is nowhere to be seen:




Looks familiar though, doesn't it? Yep, looks like I was right about those formations hiding secret areas. Well, that's another thing to keep in mind and to look at later. I arrive on Route 121 and still find no new pokémon, which is disappointing, but making up for this, I also find Team Magma:




They want to go to a place called Mt Memoria, which apparently holds supernatural powers. Ooooh, I hope that means Ghost and/or Psychic-types! They bugger off and I find the Parc Safari! Which, as you may have guessed, is the French name of the Safari Zone. I will participate and I will of course treat it like any other area, meaning that I have to catch the first now pokémon I find or lose my chance FOREVAH! Except the guardian tells me I need a Pokébloc box to participate. Well, shit.

Oh well, moving on, I arrive at a watery area where a woman tells me this is the way to Mt Memoria, a natural monument dedicated to the memory of deceased pokémon. Oh wow, how deep. It's things like this that make you realize the bond that can grow between a pokémon and its owner and what an impact these creatures can have on the lives of human beings. It is a true tribute to what humans and pokémon can accomplish together. Man, I cannot way to capture their immortal souls and make them my pet!

However, for now, I shall continue eastward and I reach a new city called Nenucrique. It's got some interesting stuff like a huge mall (in front of which Brice is standing) and the Move Eraser. I also meet a Team Magma grunt who tells me not to visit the cave in the local creek. Well, if that doesn't confirm that we must visit, I don't know what does. There's also a dock where one can travel between here and Poivressel. Well, in theory anyway because it's currently not active. Also, I can just use Fly to do that so it's all a bit pointless.

Another building of not is the museum. The curator takes me upstairs and asks me to find artists who would like to exhibit their work. What an odd side quest for Pokémon but sure, why not? Alright, time to see what Brice wants. He wants to battle and for once, he asks if I want to battle! First Pierre lets me prep and now someone actually give me an option to refuse! What's going on?! But of course, there's a "but thou must!" thing goign on as he won't move away from the mall's entrance until I fight him.

Well, Morpheo, Audrey II and Sacolne absolutely destroy his team, which barely manages to throw a couple moves in. He tells me he's going back to Bourg-en-Vol and leaves so I can check the mall and inside, I am offered a lottery ticket. If it matches one of my pokémon's ID number, I win something. Aaand it doesn't. Rubbish. But more importantly...




You can see a couple purple pixels from where the transparency wasn't handled quite right at the edges of the counter!!!!! UN-F***ING-FORGIVABLE!!!!!!! Game ruined! Worst out of 10! Anyway, at's a mall, innit? You buy stuff there, including techniques and stats boosts. There's no gym in this city so only one thing to do: check on that creek cave (that sounds a lot ruder than it did in my head) that Team Magma didn't want me to. And it's just got two grunts who prevent me from entering their oh-so clever hideout, telling me that their boss isn't there. Unfortunately, they aren't quite dumb enough to tell me where he is but I presume it's Mt Memoria, which is where we'll be going next time!

Yeah, another fairly short and basic one but that Mr Memoria stuff sounds really intriguing so I don't want to end a part awkwardly halfway through so we will begin part 15 with that and give it the time it requires. See you then!

[SsnakeBite, the No1 Frenchman]

Part 15: Tomb Raiding

Hello everyone! I'm back with more Pokémon! Let me catch you up on what happened off screen because I've got some big news! While doing my round to pick up berries on Route 121, much to my surprise, I found a new pokémon and since I hadn't met anything new there yet, I was still allowed to catch it. And since I wasn't very impressed with Morpheo, I decided to replace it with the new guy, so say hello to...




Yay! My first Ghost pokémon of this playthrough! He's immune to Ground attacks, has a "discreet" nature" and unsurprisingly knows some Ghost, Dark and Normal-type moves. The pokédex also says that these little assholes like to chas victims all night long, which is why I named it Creepybugr. And with that, as promised, we are going to Mt Memoria. To go there, we have to go through Chenal 122. No new pokémon here but interestingly, I could skip Mt Memoria and go straight to Route 123 if I felt like it, but I don't. The inside of Mt Memoria is appropriately creepy:



I wonder if the music here makes Japanese kid commit suicide too.


Much like the Pokémon Tower, this is basically a pokémon cemetary. I'm surprised this is something the Pokémon games keep bringing up and that they get away with, age ratings-wise, explicit references to pokémon dying. Good thing that can't happen within the game. I mean, can you imagine how f***ed up it would be if you were in the middle of a battle and after a stroke of bad luck, your beloved pokémon just collapsed and... and...



HEADBANG I'M SO SORRYYYYYY!! YOU WERE SO YOUNG!! WWWAAAAAAAAH!!


Ahem, let's continue. An NPC gives me a held item that apparently avoids random encounters, at least here, I guess? Well, I'll have Creepybugr hold it just in case there's a unique pokémon I can catch. Also, glad that there are still people who think that a place made to honour the dead and help the living cope with grief is the perfect spot for a pokémon battle:



Glad you two insensitive freaks are happy, at least.


Interestingly, a karateka trainer tells me that his sensei is resting here as well. So either his sensei was a pokémon or humans are buried here as well. Either way, those battles just got extra appropriate. Unsurprisingly, there are many floors to this place. I also found a path to the outside so I guess I can other areas that way but I'm staying inside for the time being. After a while, I reach this floor:




Why is that relevant? Well, if you look carefully at the tombstone above the poké ball, you'll notice that it is lighter than the rest, which I presume means it's got a special encounter. Well maybe not, actually, because on the next floor is a similar tombstone with an item next it as well, a not very useful technique. It appears that I cannot interact with the white tombstone, however. Also, it just occurred to me that that item was probably meant as an offering or tribute to a deceased pokémon/person. Oh well.

Since I reached the top, I go back down, using holes in the floor to go down quicker and now, let's check the outside. At first, it's just regular old grassy overworld stuff, but then a spooooooooooky fog appears:




You will also notice that there are more tombs here, some of which contain items, so I've upgraded from stealing tributes to the dead to straight-up grave-robbing. I am such a good role model I need my own kids' show. And speaking of morally upstanding citizens...




Yes, as predicted, Team Magma is here and after beating some grunts, I confront Max yet again and he announces that he stole something called the Blue Orb from here. And apparently, he did by threatening an elderly couple. In a graveyard. Man, even I haven't stooped that low. Yet. I expected to fight him, but he and the rest of Team Magma suddenly disappear, with Max saying they're going to Poivressel. The elderly woman says the Blue Orb should never be separated from the Red Orb as they form a whole. She then vies me the Red Orb and asks me to reunite it with the blue one.

Alright then! Audrey II, take us to Poivressel so we can kick some Magma ass, or Magmass as I like to call it. Surprisingly, I don't find the town in chaos but there IS a large crowd in front of the dock.




The reason? Captain Poupe is back and he's being interviewed! After the interview, Poupe tells me they discovered an underwater cave on Chenal 128 and he believes it houses a pokémon that was thought extinct. Oooh, interesting! But suddenly, Team Magma does appear and they steal Poupe's submarine! The twats! Max, ever the genius, taunts me by asking if I intend to follow them all the way to their hideout in Nenucrique. So back to Nenucrique we go, I guess. Wow, that sure was blatant padding.

So I go to their super-secret hideout that nobody could possibly find. I go through it and find this room.




Ah, shit, it's a teleportation puzzle, those are annoying. On the plus side, one of the grunts mentions that they have the Master Ball hidden in there somewhere! Alright! Now that's the kind of loot that makes it all worth it. So after an especially annoying puzzle room, I arrive here:




Sweet! That was actually worth it! I hit the motherlode!




Son of a bitch! And I love how this trick makes no sense whatsoever any more considering we can now see the button on poké balls yet there is no equivalent on Voltorbe or Electrode and of course, the pokémon are way larger than a poké ball. And hang on... it's level 30... that's enough for it to know Self-Destruct, isn't it?! Oh shit, oh f***, um... okay, Self-Destruct is a Normal move, isn't it? So we should be okay if I switch Creepybugr in, right? Oh God, I hope I got that right. I also realized that it's the first wild pokémon I've found in this area so I gotta catch it if I can.

Well, it doesn't self-destruct, my pokémon are fine and I managed to catch it.




Well if nothing else, that's an Electric-type I have on standby. I call it Badaboom, because I'm that creative, and we move on. There's another one in here which I dispose of, but the other two are indeed items; a gold nugget and... THE MASTER BALL YUSSSSSS!! I keep going, get lost, get back on track and finally meet a Team Magma admin guarding the submarine, who I make short work of. Unofrtunately, our battle gave Max the timeto piss off in the submarine. Fortunately, the admin advises me to go look in "the vast ocean behind Nenucrique" if I hope to find the underground cave (which begs the question of why they need the sub if you can apparently get there by land or pokémon).

F***ing... is that just Team Magma's thing? Telling me how to stop them? My god they're lucky the Pokémon world seems to have no proper police or army. Right, we'll look into that in Part 16. See you then!

Oh and, as I made my way to the pokémon centre, I caught this guy:




Oh good, another Flying/Water type. Heaven knows there haven't been enough of those in this game yet. I have nothing funny for its name so I went with a random one and came up with Dededan. I also replaced Kersquall with Badaboom. Not sure if I'll stick with this decision as Kersquall has been very good so far and Electrodes aren't the best but I really want an Electric-type in the team. See ya!

[Deleted]

About route 105 island?
Legendary yes.

Shipwreck?
Legendary no.

[Deleted]

You also should go back to Mauville, the town with the electric gym leader.
He's got a quest you missed.