J is Justice
Wade Wilson
Will now be grateful.
Hi.
Posts: 27,963
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Post by J is Justice on Dec 11, 2017 22:04:52 GMT -5
So I suffer from social anxiety, and I've never had a job because of it, but I've improved a lot this year and I'd like to make some friends. I'm just not sure where to go. I mean, I assume most people met their friends at their job. Am I wrong? I don't drink, so I don't think a bar would be my kind of place.
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Deleted
Deleted Member
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Post by Deleted on Dec 11, 2017 22:25:56 GMT -5
What do you like to do? Any hobbies?
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Juice
El Dandy
Wrong? Oh he can tell ya about being wrong.
I'm the one who raised you from perdition.
Posts: 8,172
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Post by Juice on Dec 11, 2017 22:26:27 GMT -5
Try a comic shop they have d&d, hero clicks, magic, rtc. and other games free to play usually.
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Post by Heeltown, USA on Dec 11, 2017 22:37:38 GMT -5
Go to a bar anyway. Order a drink for show and sit their on your phone like everyone else does. The bartender will try to talk to you most likely. Dont be weird and dont be rude. Tip a $1 a drink if you are gonna drink them, $3 if they are just for show. Sit there long enough and someone will be buzzed enough to invite you into their conversation. Follow the same rule when talking to them, don't be rude and dont be weird.
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J is Justice
Wade Wilson
Will now be grateful.
Hi.
Posts: 27,963
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Post by J is Justice on Dec 11, 2017 22:54:28 GMT -5
What do you like to do? Any hobbies? Gaming, mostly. I like to write and exercise, too.
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Glitch
King Koopa
Not Going To Die; Childs, we're goin' out to give Blair the test. If he tries to make it back here and we're not with him... burn him.
Watching you.
Posts: 12,710
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Post by Glitch on Dec 11, 2017 23:06:46 GMT -5
What do you like to do? Any hobbies? Gaming, mostly. I like to write and exercise, too. Then you're in luck. You can go to gaming gatherings and tournaments. Anywhere where video game lovers get together. My thing is anime, and I've met a shit ton of people through the convention scene.
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Juice
El Dandy
Wrong? Oh he can tell ya about being wrong.
I'm the one who raised you from perdition.
Posts: 8,172
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Post by Juice on Dec 11, 2017 23:34:09 GMT -5
Retro gaming stores
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Ultimo Gallos
Grimlock
Dreams SUCK!Nightmares live FOREVER!
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Post by Ultimo Gallos on Dec 12, 2017 0:28:31 GMT -5
Try a comic shop they have d&d, hero clicks, magic, rtc. and other games free to play usually. I was about to post the same thing. When I moved years ago met most of my friends thru the local comic shop. I have met lots of friends by going to local indy wrestling shows. Seems like most areas have a group of 10 or so fans that hit most shows.
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Post by EvenBaldobombHasAJob on Dec 12, 2017 6:07:45 GMT -5
yeah whatever you do, DON'T go to a bar by yourself, especially if you have social anxiety. most of my friends I met through other friends or at work. just be on the lookout for people who have common interests and strike up conversations. that's really the only advice I can give though.
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Post by Toilet Paper Roll on Dec 12, 2017 8:02:19 GMT -5
Go to meetup.com they list a bunch of local get together in your area for various activities. Not a dating site. A lot of people meet others of like interests.
When I was getting into home brewing beer I used it and still have some friends from it.
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wankah
Don Corleone
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Member is Online
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Post by wankah on Dec 12, 2017 8:02:36 GMT -5
Now what's wrong with going to a bar by yourself?
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Brood Lone Wolf Funker
Ozymandius
Got fined anyway. Possibly a Moose
James Franco is the white Donald Glover
Posts: 61,747
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Post by Brood Lone Wolf Funker on Dec 12, 2017 8:38:10 GMT -5
Honestly see what events your local library has, most are free and informative. I had similar issues and tried a book discussion and do it when I can
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Deleted
Deleted Member
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Post by Deleted on Dec 12, 2017 11:49:32 GMT -5
I'd recommend developing more hobbies and stuff.
Take some classes on cooking or whatever you're interested in/want to learn about or volunteer for some charitable organization - stuff where you interact with people with common ground already there (learning a new skill, trying to accomplish a goal). Common interests are the easiest way to make new friends.
Obviously, don't go into these things with the INTENTION of meeting people but just enjoy your time and let stuff happen naturally/organically.
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Post by Baby, it’s Jes outside on Dec 12, 2017 12:28:16 GMT -5
Go to any hospital or nursing home. The people there are usually friendly and happy to see someone new.😀
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Powerline
ALF
I'm a pale imitator of a boy in the sky, with a cap on his head and a knot in his tie
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Post by Powerline on Dec 12, 2017 12:31:48 GMT -5
Yeah, if you go into a videogame store or a place that doesn't just employ people looking for a summer job (I've tried to strike up conversations about basic gaming stuff at GameStop and get the "deer in the headlights" look...nothing against them, just saying you might hit a dead end), just strike up a convo about videogames and you're gold. You could even ask for recommendations and try to follow up with how you feel about those games or any legit questions you may have. You don't want them to have the entire conversation, but it's alright if you bait them into instigating the bulk of it to start.
Oftentimes, if you get a good convo going, someone else will overhear and chime in too. It's pretty neat. On a recent trip to Vintage Stock, I just asked to look at a copy of Lunar 2 Complete on the PS1 (which is packed with a bunch of extra stuff, so I wanted to see what was/wasn't there and what the condition was). And as I was talking about how cool it'd be to have it in the collection (and I did end up buying it), me and the clerk and a couple other collectors ended up having a 30-45 minute convo about what we had. And it would've absolutely gone longer but I was on a time limit so I had to break off of it.
The last thing I'd say is to not be discouraged if you have a few awkward interactions. You're not gonna go from quiet to a bevy of conversation, it's not an on/off switch. Just taking the step is a W, don't view it as a loss if you have an awkward encounter or even more awkward encounters than not. The awkward encounter and misunderstanding are going to be inevitable, even if you're a social butterfly. Just don't overstep your boundaries (start cussing a bunch regardless of what the target is, make physical contact with a stranger or acquaintance).
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Post by Manute Bol on Dec 12, 2017 23:14:50 GMT -5
Now what's wrong with going to a bar by yourself? Nothing. But I can't think of a worse recommendation for a person who lead off by explaining that they have social anxiety. And then followed that up with saying they don't drink.
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J is Justice
Wade Wilson
Will now be grateful.
Hi.
Posts: 27,963
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Post by J is Justice on Dec 12, 2017 23:25:44 GMT -5
I think I'll try a retro gaming store. I'll have to see if there's any in my area.
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Post by ShaolinHandLock on Dec 13, 2017 4:01:31 GMT -5
Am I allowed to ask why you want to? People are terrible, I wouldn't bother.
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Deleted
Deleted Member
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Post by Deleted on Dec 13, 2017 6:23:18 GMT -5
I also have anxiety and no friends. I'll hang out with you if you live near me.
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Post by walkwithcena on Dec 16, 2017 2:36:40 GMT -5
Join a kickball league or book club,both are really just excuses for adults to make friends.
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