I may have to abandon a cat

[Sephiroth]

Well, put him up for adoption, really. Several months ago I took in a grown cat from a friend of my mom’s who had to give him up. His name is Max. I did my best to acclimate him to my home, and to my other cat, Baby, as slowly as possible. I can’t say its been an easy run. Baby most definitely has not taken to this interloper in her domain and they clash frequently-and I am not talking the kind of play fighting where it can be construed as cute; this is real fighting where she makes the most godawful screech this side of Jamie Lee Curtis in Halloween. The disruption has also apparently frayed Baby’s nerves so much she has taken to having on and off bouts of peeing on my bed or my clothes. What’s more, Max has made a habit of picking these fights with her at night when I am trying to get some sleep. Max also has an unfortunate habit of wolfing his food far too fast, which in turn causes him to get sick all over my rugs and floor, and this morning, on my drapes. The real back breaker for me has been that I just purchased a new couch, my first piece of furniture to call my own instead of a hand me down-and Max has already been stretching his claws on it, pulling threads loose and leaving marks. I’ve tried citrus spray that is supposed to repel him, but it has no apparent effect. At this stage I am just at my wits end; my furniture is being ruined, my clothes are being ruined, and I’m short of sleep. I have never had to give up on a pet before in my life, but I just don’t think this is working out. Has anyone ever been in this situation before>

[Dr. T is an alien]

We sort of went through this last year. We decided that we were ready for a new sphynx cat after Ata passed at the beginning of last year. We wanted to get two this time so the the cats could have company when we were not at home. Yeah, I can tell you now that it is much more work than we realized.

We reached out to a breeder who had two female kittens available, but one was a girl she initially got to be a new queen for her and she was a full month older than the other one. We wanted siblings so that they would be acquainted well with each other, but she did not have siblings available until next year but did offer us a discount. Unfortunately, since the older one played rough with the little one, the breeder could not keep them together as much as she would have liked. When we got them, the big one started playing rough again, leading to real fights.

The really irritating part was that we broke the bigger one of her rough play fairly quickly, but that is when the little one started provoking fights all of the time. The big one would take it for a little bit, then give the little one the ass-kicking she was begging for. It was then that we learned just how territorial girl cats can be (boys are much more mellow in this regard, apparently).

In all honesty, if the kittens were the exact same size we would have let them work it out. Unfortunately, one month is a big difference in kittens and we could not let them do so on their own. The fighting was the only issue we had, mind you, as both girls were very sweet, loving, and playful when kept separated.

The breeder is a good one who always keeps touch with her kittens she adopts out. We mentioned the fighting, which we asked for siblings to avoid, and she made us an offer. She would refund us our money, find a home for both girls, and she would let us have our picks of the next litter. We took the offer and she immediately found loving homes for both kittens.

We now have two brothers that we got in April. They.....are a bit of a handful. No real fighting going on, though one can be grouchy around the other at times. Still, they do hang out together a lot during the day (and they both choose to close their evenings by cuddling with me together - EVERY SINGLE NIGHT).

[Prince Petty]

Jul 23, 2019 6:32:13 GMT -5 Sephiroth said:

Max also has an unfortunate habit of wolfing his food far too fast, which in turn causes him to get sick all over my rugs and floor, and this morning, on my drapes.

This part seems to indicate that the cats see each other as competition - Max is eating his food quickly because he's concerned that the other cat may try to steal it. He also probably doesn't want to be off his guard for long. Do you feed them in the same space or apart?

Cats are very territorial, and often see another cat in their space as a threat. Sometimes this can be resolved by ensuring they have safe spaces and plenty of escape routes so they can avoid confrontation. Have you noticed either of the cats avoiding communal spaces and/or hiding?

And have you noticed either cat being noticeably more skittish and nervous than the other? This can often be the cause of a lot of fights, because cats have a high hunting instinct, and will instinctively go after anything that acts like prey. We have that same problem with our cat, who was bullied by her littermates and even six years later she immediately goes into a defensive posture when another cat is around. Often, the neighbourhood cats just can't seem to resist going after her when she does it. If so, then the answer is usually to try and build the confidence of the nervous cat, through playing with them and encouraging their own hunting instincts.

I'm certainly not an expert, or anything of the kind, and you'd probably need a cat behaviourist to see what's going on with them, and give some more qualified suggestions. But ultimately, if you can find a good home for Max then that might be the best solution. He gets his own territory, and Baby gets hers back, and they don't have to share.

[Dr. T is an alien]

Another thing to consider is having at least 3 litter boxes. If you only have one, they may start avoiding it as each marks it as their own. Another possibility is to get baby gates to allow you to close off a room for one of them while they can still see and smell each other in order to acclimate to each other without getting the opportunity to fight.