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Post by Joel, Mike, Currently...? on Mar 9, 2005 19:02:37 GMT -5
The feed is interrupted, and is replaced by Joel Nelson and Mike Hodgson, standing inside a disclosed location.
Joel: I hope you didn't forget about us.
Mike: Yeah, we just...had other stuff to do.
Joel: We had a huge assignment in History.
Mike: Shut up!
Joel: You shut up!
Mike: Anyway, we're here to tell you, we're still coming, and Judgement Day is...(checks calendar) Friday. This Friday.
Joel: Yup.
..........
Mike: Great line, Joel. We definitely instilled fear in the EWT locker room's hearts.
Joel: Shut up!
Mike: You shut up!
The two begin to roll around and wrestle, as the feed goes back to our regular EWT programming.
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Post by HMARK Center on Mar 9, 2005 20:05:22 GMT -5
<HMark is seen, a bit dazed, sitting in the back>
A big mistake...a Very. Big. Mistake.
One that will soon be rectified...
<camera fades>
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Post by Baron Von Bullshit on Mar 9, 2005 20:49:30 GMT -5
:: Da Crapper walks into the arena via some parking lot entrance that no one in their right mind uses, carrying a gym bag as well as the sweaty, filthy clothing we're used to seeing on him. He is wearing sunglasses, but the lenses have been broken and poked out. Mark Lloyd appears, if anything just to annoy us, and sticks a microphone in Da Crapper's face. ::
Mark Lloyd: Crapper! Crapper! Its been a long time since we've seen you around the EWT! In fact, the last time we saw you, you helped Team EWT clean house against the nBo! Where have you been?!
Da Crapper: As you know, I was under the hypnotic trance of my alter-ego, the dangerous Poo Monger. I have spent many months in the bowels of africa, sifting through the turd and waste of that baron land, searching for inner peace.
Mark Lloyd: Do you think you've found it?
Da Crapper: Yes, I think I have.
Mark Lloyd: What about a return to the ring? Can we expect to see you in action?
Da Crapper: Aye, but first I must talk to T3h T00mness!
Mark Lloyd: Well, good luck Mr. Crapper, and we're glad to have you back!
:: Crapper nods, and begins his search for Toomi. ::
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Post by cwo on Mar 9, 2005 21:20:58 GMT -5
*Bernownanownow...cereal world order*
(Three characters come out to the ring and stand tall in the middle. They all have microphones.)
FrankenberrygoestoHollywood: Let me tell you something brother, we're taking over.
Da Boo Guy: Yeah, We're the sour milk coming into the EWT bowl.
Big Count Cool: Yes'a. We'a are the'a ceral World Order!
FrankenberrygoestoHollywood: Oh yeah dude, and we're cereal gone stale. Nobody wants us, nobody likes us, but we will take over the cupboard!
(The cWo leave the ring to their theme music.)
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Post by Baron Von Bullshit on Mar 9, 2005 21:22:03 GMT -5
BK: LMFAO!
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Post by Toom E. Guci on Mar 9, 2005 21:33:40 GMT -5
*Bernownanownow...cereal world order* (Three characters come out to the ring and stand tall in the middle. They all have microphones.) FrankenberrygoestoHollywood: Let me tell you something brother, we're taking over. Da Boo Guy: Yeah, We're the sour milk coming into the EWT bowl. Big Count Cool: Yes'a. We'a are the'a ceral World Order! FrankenberrygoestoHollywood: Oh yeah dude, and we're cereal gone stale. Nobody wants us, nobody likes us, but we will take over the cupboard! (The cWo leave the ring to their theme music.) *Toomi Bischoff walks out of the back & stands in the aisleway looking at these 3 freaks.* Oh, for the love of Vince McMahon, what the hell is this?? Can you 3 whackos get out of my ring please? Security, security, take these man out back, please? *Security comes to the ring & gets beat up by cWo.* Hey, you guys ain't to bad. Or I need to higher stronger security. Look, I have a major announcement. Do you mind leaving? BCC: Sure. I s'pose. TB: Thanks. I appreciate it. *Toomi gets in the ring with microphone in hand.* Now, I have an important matter to attend to. See, once again, D-Boy has decided to stick his nose in EWT business & use a taser on HitmanMark. So, I have decided this...D-Boy, so HitmanMark can get his hands on you & make you pay...I'm not pressing charges anymore. Not at all. I have decided to reinstate you to the EWT. And why? So HitmanMark can bring you to hell himself. And the fans won't miss a bloody minute of it. All you have to do is sign.....the dotted line
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Post by Baron Von Bullshit on Mar 9, 2005 21:34:38 GMT -5
:: A half hour after the search began, Da Crapper winds up in the middle of the ring, where the fans sit quietly, wondering who the bald guy in the ring is. :: Da Crapper: I know most of you people don't remember me, after all... why should you? I was on my back most of my career here in the EWT.. but no more! That is about to change! What I am asking right now, is to be re-instated in the EWT! *canned heat* Da Crapper: I'm laying down an open challenge to anyone in the EWT who wants a match with me! Bring it on! ... I'm lonely
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jzbadblood
Unicron
Christ, man. Can't you see what's happening? Can't you read between the lines?
Posts: 3,052
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Post by jzbadblood on Mar 9, 2005 21:42:31 GMT -5
Toomi hears a knock on the door and opens it up. Jz stands there with The Ultimate Lawyer.
Jz: Hey Toomi, I'll just sign that and...
Toomi: You? Sign it! This a contract for D-Boy, not you.
Jz: So, I can sign it for him.
Toomi: No you can't.
Jz: I don't know when D-Boy will be back, I think he went for coffee. This could take days!
Toomi: The contract is on the table, he can sign it at anytime.
Jz: Oh...no deadline?
Toomi: Not really.
Jz: Sorry about that...umm...did you see those freaks dressed as cereal box characters?
Toomi: Yes.
Jz: Yeah...how about that local sports team?
Toomi closes the door and Jz stares at it, Ultimate Lawyer shrugging his shoulders.
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Post by invaderdave on Mar 9, 2005 21:44:19 GMT -5
Dave walks by, holding mug and in a bathrobe.
Dave: Jz, Lawyer.
Lawyer and Jz: Hey Dave. *** Bk: Nope, there really was no need for that.
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Post by cwo on Mar 9, 2005 21:50:31 GMT -5
(The cWo walks back, pouring milk all over themselves like champagne)
Mean Jean: Hello fellas, what is going on here.
FrankenberrygoestoHollywood: Let me tell you something Mean Jean, we're celebrating because we have announced we're taking over.
Mean Jean: Well..
FrankenberrygoestoHollywood: And Toomiguci, don't send the security. We took out that 2-Can Sam guy, and he was tough. Security is not a healthy part of our nutrional breakfast, and we don't need to be counting them calories.
Big Count Cool: Yes'a, we are'a good.
FrankenberrygoestoHollywood: Definatly dude.
Da Boo Guy: We also don't want a contract. We don't want to wrestle. We're here to take over, but we ain't here to wrestle so fogetabout it.
(The cWo walks away from Mean Jean)
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jzbadblood
Unicron
Christ, man. Can't you see what's happening? Can't you read between the lines?
Posts: 3,052
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Post by jzbadblood on Mar 9, 2005 21:54:59 GMT -5
Jz and Lawyer sit in their locker room and play checkers. The door flys open and Dave stands there. Jz: ? Dave: ? Lawyer: ? Evil Monkey: EEEEHHHH!
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Post by Baron Von Bullshit on Mar 9, 2005 21:55:46 GMT -5
Da Crapper: Damn it! I need to get noticed! I need to make an impact! No one is going to ignore me forever!
:: Da Crapper sees the cWo chit chatting. Crapper then runs at them full steam. Da Boo Guy turns around and hits a mighty marshmallow big boot to Da Crapper! Big Count Cool then picks a dazed Crapper up and powerbombs him through a cardboard box! The cWo laugh and then move along, leaving Da Crapper dazed and confused. ::
Da Crapper: That didn't go so well...
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Post by dorf on Mar 9, 2005 22:03:54 GMT -5
BK: Whoo-hoo, the Nyrds are back! . LMAO on the cWo
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jzbadblood
Unicron
Christ, man. Can't you see what's happening? Can't you read between the lines?
Posts: 3,052
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Post by jzbadblood on Mar 9, 2005 22:07:41 GMT -5
Jim Hoss: This place is going to hell in a hamblanket! Bah Gawd!
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Post by The Lach is very tired on Mar 9, 2005 22:08:51 GMT -5
*Spaz opens the door to the locker room & sees Jz & the Lawyer standing next to a water cooler with Dave, Spaz runs up & hits Dave with the Platinum Shockwave & takes his place next to Jz.*
Jz: Hey Spaz, *fills his cup from the water cooler* did you see desperate housewives last night.
S: Yeah, man that Eva Longoria is one hot mamacita.
Jz: Yeah, what do you think Lawyer type guy?
Lawyer: I prefer Teri Hatcher.
S: Each to their own I guess.
*Spaz gets a drink from the water cooler as we cut to commercial.*
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Post by curtrok on Mar 9, 2005 22:41:45 GMT -5
*Botchberg is seen in the locker room area standing next to a pillar. He keeps smashing the pillar with his forearm. Each time he smashes it plaster from the room flies down to the ground. With each blast the room shakes.*
JR: Bah gawd he is one intense athlete. I would not want to cross his path on the way to the world title. What a mule. What a Hoss! What a combatant. That man is "da man" Botchberg!
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ape
Unicron
Aunt Blabby Tells All.
bea wants all you sweathogs to take a look at what a REAL man is supposed to look like
Posts: 3,223
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Post by ape on Mar 9, 2005 22:45:43 GMT -5
*sergeantapeguy sits in a padded room with home-made contruction paper purple hearts tacked onto the walls. the ape is in full army garb and slowly looks up towards the camera.*
....communism.....it's about sharing.....i see that now....about sharing the good things in life...hehe...and the bad....as much as i hate to admit it....i think i'm going to have to the the communist thing....hehe....and share my pain with marcel...and heidendorf.....hehe marcel....he thinks he can take me out...that he's a living legend....hehe....
*the ape jumps to his feet and puts his face in the camera, spitting everywhere.*
....well, i'm a living war hero, puke!.....i'm a veteran of the ewt battle fields.......i've bled more in this dang company.....than perhaps everyone in this company combined....i've lost my hair in battle....i lost my eye in battle........and now....the communists plan on taking my sandwiches?!?! enough is enough!......ask not what you can do to sergeantapeguy....ask what sergeantapeguy can do to you....you maggots.....
*sergeantapeguy backs off from the camera.*
.....marcel....you gave me a beating in our match....hehe...but isn't it odd?....hehe i'm known as a brawler....a hardcore freak.....hehe and you're a wrestler......a technician.....and i pinned you with a wrestling hold....hehe...you're not a legend.....but i'll make you one, marcel....the blood you lose....will be legendary....it'll be an honorable way to lose in battle...i will rid the ewt of communism....it is my duty...hehe....my duty as a soldier....my duty for this bingo hall....my duty...
*the ape salutes the camera*
...for the united states of america....hehe...i'll drain you of your communist passion....and i'll use your blood to do it....hehe.....so, come and get me, commies....hehe come and get me.....and thaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat's an ooooorder.....you're dismissed, pukes....
*the ape turns his back to the camera and grabs a purple heart off the wall and begins to eat it. he spits a chunk of it out of his mouth and makes a disgusted look on his face and begins to punch himself in the skull...after a few seconds, he stops, puts his hand on his heart and begins to sing the united states national anthem as the camera fades to black.*
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Post by HMARK Center on Mar 10, 2005 1:51:16 GMT -5
<A monitor shows a recording of Toomi's announcement concerning D-Boy. The camera pans back to reveal HMark, in a t-shirt and jeans, with a slow, evil smile spreading across his lips. The pieces of the puzzle have finally fallen in place...>
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Post by *"@-BoMb" R.I.P Deus/Dinobot on Mar 10, 2005 2:36:46 GMT -5
BK:Sorry to hear about your loss mprox, my condolences go out to you. If you need someone to talk to I'm hear man.
I meant to have the tourney match typed up tonight, but I was too tired and couldn't think straight....so it should be posted tomorrow. Now excuse me I have some z's to catch.
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Post by THE Dinobot on Mar 10, 2005 3:22:44 GMT -5
Marcel Adams comes out to the ring totally unexpected, in a expensive suit and looking completly serious. And holding in both of his hands, his Stable Championship and the Marcel Adams Title. He gets in the ring and ask for a mic, and recieves one.
The fans are basically boo'ing him out of the areana. But that doesn't stop him from talking this time (not that it ever did before).
Marcel: Please....please. May I have some silence for once please? I know I don't deserve it, after going after everything the EWT stand for, but please, I have something to get off my chest.
*The fans calm down for a moment, after noticing he's completely serious.*
Marcel: Thank you very much. I'm going to shoot with you right now. And Toomi, you can shut me off if you'd like, but, I have to say this. You see, I've been in the professional wrestling business for 36 years. And God as my witness, there was never anything I wanted to do more. And while it may not be the most honest or safe business to be in, I would never, NEVER asked to have been anything else but a pro wrestler.
I've been lied to by the best. Wrestled every top name that has been around since I started. Beaten and lost to the best. Held multiple world and other titles. And because I've lived my dream of being a pro wrestler and actually got to make life-long career out of it, that many don't ever get to, I would just like to say, Thank you, to all the fans in this arena and across the world.
*Some fans start to clap and cheer for him, then Marcel actually begins to swell up.*
Marcel: Please, don't. I don't deserve it. I've treated you EWT fans like total sh**, so you have every right to hate me. While some just play the part of the badguy around here, I came to the EWT to personally attack, you the fans and everyone of the boys in the back.
*Marcel then lays both of his title in the middle of the ring*
Marcel: But what I'm really trying to get at is....after 36 years in this great profession, I really know now, i have nothing else left. This isn't just because apeguy beat me, he was a hell of a match. And I now have more respect for him then I do half of the others I have ever stepped in the ring with.
So, as I lay these titles here, I would like to say, I'm officually annoucing my retirment from the world of professional wrestling, and this isn't one of those faux retirements either. And it's great to know that I'm going out with two championships.
And, Toomi, I know we've had or differences since I came here, and for that, I'm truely sorry. You truely are a leader around here and a great business man, and try your hardest to give the fans here everything they ask for. But, I'm here, as a man, asking for you to come out and shake my hand and accept my apology for all I've done around here and said about you and your wonderful die hard fans.
*Toomi Bischoff comes out, as Marcel pulls out his hand for a handshake.*
Toomi: Are you serious?
Macel: Yes, sir. Please shake my hand. I know I havn't been more then a pain in the ass since coming here, and all, but please, give me the pleasure of going out in style, shaking the hand of the greatest wrestling promoter I've ever had the pleasure to work for in my life.
*Toomi accepts and the two shake hands, and Marcel pulls him in for a hug and whispers in Toomi's ear 'thank you for the oppertunnity'. Then Marcel takes the mic again*
Marcel: Can we hear it for, Toomi Bischoff everyone? Without him, none of us would be here, and I wouldn't have had the passion to continue for the time I've been here.
*The fans cheer loudly, and there are even mixture of chants for 'Toomi' and 'Marcel'. Toomi exits the ring, due to having some work to do backstage, and within 15 seconds later, Dorf comes out*
Dorf: WHAT are you doing?
*Marcel doesn't say anything and turns his back to Dorf*
Dorf: Pick up your damn titles, you old washed-up has been.
*Still, Marcel doesn't say anything, and slowly exits the ring and walks up the ramp, and exits the arena. Dorf, grabs up both titles and storms off to the back, without saying another word.*
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