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Post by The Lach is very tired on Mar 11, 2006 23:11:30 GMT -5
*The PTA's music hits & Pain & Canceler head to the ring.*
Bobby Cruiz: The following tag team contest is scheduled for one fall! Now making their way to the ring representing the PTA Prinicipal Pain & The Canceler!!
*They get into the ring & to a chorus of boos. They stand waiting. When "Personal Jesus" by Maralyn Manson plays & Limey & Spaz appear! They are both draped in their respective national flags (Limey - UK & Spaz - Australia). They high five fans as they head down the ramp.*
BC: And thier opponents, representing Generation Tech, Spaz & the EWT World Heavyweight Champion Limey!!
*They roll into the ring & come face to face with Pain & Canceler. The ref gets between the teams & sends Spaz & Canceler to their corners. The bell rings & Limey & Pain circle each other in the ring. They lock up & Limey gets leverage & gets Pain in a wrist lock, he wrenches the arm & sweeps Pain's legs out from under him he keeps hold of the wrist & drops his elbow into Pain's shoulder. Limey rises & plays to the crowd. They start a LIMEY! chant & this annoys Pain as he rises rubbing his shoulder. Pain chops Limey hard & Limey chops back but Pain grabs Limey's hand & armdrags Limey to the mat, he waits for Limey to rise & nails a dropkick. Limey goes down again & Pain grabs his legs looking to lock on a submission move but Limey fights him off. Limey kips up & Pain swings at him. Limey ducks it & grabs Pain's arm, he walks over to his corner & tags in Spaz, this draws a pop from the fans & he goes to the top. With Limey still holding on to Pain arm Spaz leaps off & nails Pain with a Dropkick. The ref orders Limey out of the ring & Pain is down trying to rub feeling back into his arm. Spaz pulls him to his feet & tries to hit a Vertical Suplex, but Pain blocks it. He pushes Spaz off & he bounces off the ropes & into a Hip Toss from Pain. Spaz is up quickly but Pain locks on around the waist & hits a German Suplex with a Bridge.*
1 2 NO!
*Limey breaks the count. Both men rise & trade punches, Spaz ducks Pain's shot & hits a Neckbreaker. Spaz then tries to lock on the Sydney Cloverleaf but Pain kicks him away & he hits the back of his head on the top Turnbuckle. Spaz drops to the mat as Pain tags in The Canceler. Canceler walks over to Spaz & pulls him up by his hair, he hoists him off the ground & hits a Sidewalk Slam. He tries a cover.*
1 2 KICKOUT!!
*Spaz kicks out Canceler just shrugs & pulls Spaz to his feet again he slaps Spaz hard across the chest & the impact is heard throughout the arena. Spaz reels & Canceler locks on a Full Nelson & hits a big Full Nelson Slam. Spaz is in trouble as Pain applauds Canceler's work thus far. Canceler starts to stomp away at Spaz's head the ref gets some seperation between the two & Spaz is able to get back to a vertical base but he doesn't look very good. Canceler grabs Spaz's throat & lifts him up he then throws him across the ring like a rag doll. Canceler walks over & tries another cover.*
1 2 ROPEBREAK!
*Spaz get his foot up on the bottom rope but he doesn't look good. Canceler pulls Spaz up but he is able to hit a Down Under DDT out of nowhere!! Spaz hooks the leg.*
1 2 NO!!
*Pain breaks the pin up & he stomps Spaz hard in the back of the head. The ref gets him out of the ring & both men are slowly back up. Spaz charges at Canceler but is met with a Big Boot! Spaz hits the mat hard Canceler smiles devilishly & Pulls Spaz up. He grasb Spaz around the throat & nails a huge Chokeslam! He tries a pin.*
1 2 NO!!
*Limey breaks it up! Canceler gets up & pulls Spaz up too. He looks to plant Spaz with a Powerbomb but Spaz counters it with a Tornado DDT! Both men are down & the crowd is cheering for Spaz to make the tag. Both men are crawling to their corners & Both men reach at the same time! Limey & pain charge at each other but Limey knocks Pain down with a clothesline. Pain gets up & is levelled with a dropkick! Canceler runs in & he is met with a Dropkick back out! Spaz picks up Pain & is looking for the Twist O' Lime! But he is nailed from behind with a chair by Virus! The ref calls for the ball as Eddie Omega nails Spaz with a baseball bat. The PTA members double team the Gen. Tech members until Spyke runs down with a chair of his own & the PTA roll out of the ring & head back up the ramp laughing. Gen. Tech get to their feet & point angrily at the PTA*
BC: Here are your winners by disqualification Limey & Spaz, Generation Tech!
*Personal Jesus plays & Spyke checks to make sure his colleagues are ok. As we fade to commercial The PTA raise all point to Gen. Tech & make throat cutting gestures.*
CUT TO COMMERCIAL FOR FREEK SHOW DVD
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Post by *"@-BoMb" R.I.P Deus/Dinobot on Mar 12, 2006 1:38:03 GMT -5
*A-Bomb's music hits and he gets a mixture of boos and cheers.
Announcer:Accompanied to the ring by Stevie Richards weighing in at 268lbs A-Bomb.
*A-Bomb sits on the top rope as he awaits the OX Division Champion. Bolt's music hits the arena and the fans cheer.
Announcer:Weighing in at 233lbs the OX Division Champion the Bolt Bacana.
*Bolt climbs into the ring and hands the referee the belt. The two men mouth off of to each other. The ref rings the bell and A-Bomb fires off with chops. He Irish Whips Bolt into the ropes. Bolt hits a shoulder block on A-Bomb. A-Bomb rolls thru onto his feet, Bolt bounces back off of the ropes, A-Bomb drop toe holds him and rolls him into a pin 1...kickout. A-Bomb motions for Bacana to get up and goes for another chop, Bolt blocks and returns with chops of his own. Bacana hits a short arm Northern Lights Suplex for a 1 1/2 count.
Bolt waits for A-Bomb to get to his feet and flys towards him for a crossbody. A-Bomb ducks and springboards off of the ropes with a twisting flip senton splash onto Bolt. A-Bomb gets up and hits a standing moonsault for the cover 1..2. Bacana rolls A-Bomb into a cradle 1...2. They both kip up, Bacana nails Bomb with an Enziguri and follows with a hurricurana. Bolt springs off of the 2nd rope with a leg drop 1 1/2 count. Bolt locks on a leg scissors around A-Bomb's neck. A-Bomb lifts Bacana up with his strength and powerbombs him. A-Bomb springs off of the ropes with a cartwheel into a leg drop.
He motions for Bolt to get up and charges at him. Bolt hits a spinning headscissors, Bomb reverses springs Bolt chest first off of the top rope and falls back, Bolt reverses with a reverse X-Factor. Bolt grabs Bomb and hits a Tornado Snap Suplex. He then climbs to the top rope and hits a moonsault, A-Bomb gets his knees up but Bolt lands on his feet and senton splashes onto Bomb for a pin 1...2...A-Bomb reverses into a cradle pin 1..2...kickout. Bolt kips up and A-Bomb lays him out with a vicious clotheline. He looks and laughs at him.
Bomb picks up Bolt and belly to belly suplexes him over the top rope onto Stevie by mistake. A-Bomb climbs out of the ring and tosses Bolt back in. A-Bomb sets up for the Pounce. He begins to charge, but Stevie grabs his foot causing him to slip up. Bolt hits the Bolt from the Blue V.2 on A-Bomb 1...2...3*late kick out*
*Bolt celebrates as A-Bomb looks in shock*
Announcer:Your winner and still EWT Ox Division Champion, Bolt Bacana! A-Bomb:What the hell!?
*looks at Stevie*
A-Bomb: You tripped me!
Stevie:You threw a 233 pound man on top of me!
A-Bomb:It was an accident!
Stevie:You also screwed me out of a match so we're even!
A-Bomb:Dammit, Stevie!
*A-Bomb looks at Bolt *shrugs and shakes his hand*
*Stevie and A-Bomb walk up the ramp both looking pissed*
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Limey
Unicron
It's been awhile.
Posts: 3,062
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Post by Limey on Mar 12, 2006 3:05:10 GMT -5
*We are backstage with Generation Tech. Sum Guy, microphone in hand, starts up an interview.*
Sum Guy: I'm Sum Guy and I just dropped my bagel! Now, I'm here with Generation Tech, one of EWT's newest factions, and probably one of the most anticipated. We all saw what the PTA pulled...my question is...what are your thoughts?
Spyke: Thoughts? Sum, those PTA chumps know NOTHING about how Generation Tech runs a fight!
Spaz: Generation Tech is all about the three-way system. Respect, Loyalty, and ability! The PTA tries to take it to us, we'll hit them right back...but on OUR terms! And as long as we've got the PTA on our backs, how the hell are we supposed to stick to those terms, Sum?
Sum: Uh...well I guess so...probably the biggest problem we've got is that Limey...as EWT World Heavyweight Champion, you promised Spaz a title shot when next you defend...at least against a proper opponent...and with Generation Tech being hounded by the PTA...how do you expect to keep that promise?
*Limey looks to be in deep thought, then he develops a smile.*
Limey: Hang on, lads...I've got a great idea.
Spyke: (Beat) Does it involve getting drunk and hitting the clubs?
Limey: It just might. Sum, all you need to know now is that if the PTA want a war, they've got one...but it's one OUR TERMS. Respect...
Spyke: Loyalty...
Spaz: And Ability! That's the Tao of Generation Tech, Sum!
Limey: And that's exactly what I have in mind when thinking of how to give the truly worthy the opportunity...and how to deal with the PTA all in one...we'll reveal it later, Sum.
*Generation Tech then leave Sum Guy all confused.*
Sum: Well, I'm Sum Guy, and I hope the idea does not involve Sean Waltman in any way. Back to you.
*Cut to next segment.*
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Post by chanceconfidence on Mar 12, 2006 3:28:23 GMT -5
Styles: Well... coming up next, Chance Confidence will be in action... taking on the Leader of the L.A.X. Konnan.
The camera cuts to the ring.
Announcer: The following contest is scheduled for one fall!
First off, the L.A.X. theme starts up as Konnan heads down to the ring with his posse.
Announcer: Introducing first, accompanied to the rign by Homicide and Machete, From Mexico, weighing in at 250 pounds... Konnan!!!
The crowd boos as Konnan enters the ring... awaiting his opponent.
Announcer: And the opponent...
School's out for the Summer starts up... but nobody comes out. The Announcer looks confused... as does Chance's opponent.
Styles:Wait a minute, we just got word that somethings happening backstage!
The screen cuts to the back... where Crauswell is still chasing Chance... as they are now outside in the parking lot. Confidence runs full speed... as Crauswell stays right on him. Finally the gryphon man catches him and starts pummeling him with stiff fist after stiff fist. Chance groans, staggering back with each one... but then manages to duck under one and counter with some stiff fists of his own! Crauswell stumbles back a bit as each one connects. Finally though, Crauswell catches one of Chance's fists... and pulls him forward... going for a powerful lariat. However... Chance resists. He nails Crauswell with a low blow kick... causing him to drop to the ground... groaning in pain.
Chance then takes off again, hopping into a convertible and peeling right out of the EWT Arena... as Crauswell gets back up and watches Chance speed away. He looks pissed... watching as he drives off.
Cut back to the ring.
Styles: Well... it looks like Chance may not be back at this arena... at least until next week.
Announcer: Ladies and Gentlemen, as a result of count out... here is your winner... Konnan!!!
Konnan looks a bit confused. but shrugs... exitting the ring... as the L.A.X. follow him.
Fade to commercial.
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Post by jester on Mar 12, 2006 4:29:22 GMT -5
Jeremy Borash is standing in the ring, mic in hand.
Borash: "Ladies and Gentlemen....Please welcome...making his EWT debut....From Akron, Ohio.....JESTER COLT JACKAL!!!"
"Redefine" by SOiL hits the P.A. system as the lights start flashing briallant neon blues, purples, and reds. A video plays of Jester making his way to the ring, wrestling opponents; focusing mainly on his signature moves and his finisher.
Jester storms on onstage shaking his head to his theme. The fans cheer, trying to give the new guy some support. Jester salutes the crowd then walks down and tags some fans' hands. Jester slides in and gets up on the top rope, saluting the fans again. Jester jumps down as his opponent's music begins to play, and the lights return to normal.
Borash: "And his opponent....from Elizabeth, New Jersey....JAY...LETHAL!!!"
Lethal makes his usual way out, the crowd growing louder. Lethal slides in and immediately begins teeing off with Jester. Lethal catches Jester in a full nelson, and whips him back. Jester backflips picture perfect and lands on his feet, avoiding the Dragon Suplex.
J.R: "A nice display of athletism right here. We don't know alot about this young kid from Ohio, but that right there showed us he's athletic."
Lethal spins around to get an Axe Kick to the face, knocking him down. Jester pumps himself up, feeling the momentum. Lethal is up in a second, but gets knocked down with a clothesline this time. Jester goes for a standing senton, but Lethal rolls out of the way. Jester lands with a thud as Lethal goes for a senton of his own. Jester rolls out of the way, and Lethal kips up. Both men crash in the middle of the ring with double clotheslines.
Mike Tenay: "And look at that, Jester was able to build momentum, but Lethal had it scouted. Jester showed he can counter too."
J.R: "And both men thinking the same thing smash into each other with those vicious clotheslines."
Lethal is up first and measures Jester. Jester gets up only to recieve a EnzuFury, making him corkscrew in mid-air. Jester backs into the corner in a sitting posistion as Lethal starts building his own head of steam with lefts, rights, and body shots. Lethal follows up with a kick to the mid-section and a Snap Suplex with authority.
Tenay: "Ouch! Lethal shot him off hard with that one!"
Lethal continues to go to work on the rising Jester with vicious European Uppercuts. Jester is now backed against the ropes, taking shot after shot. Jester finally grabs Lethal by the head, and spins first himself, then Lethal which sends Lethal into the corner. Jester starts lighting Lethal up with knife-edged chops, the audience "WOOOOOO"ing their approval.
J.R: "God Almighty, chop after chop Jester makes his way back into this match folks!!"
Jester goes to irish whips Jay Lethal into the turnbuckle, but Lethal reverses it. Lethal looks up to be hit with a thunderous Whisper In The Wind, Jester's heel crashing with a sickening thud into Lethal's forehead. Jester lands sitting, with shock on his face.
Jester kips up and drags the dazed Lethal to his feet. Jester locks his arm, then knees him in the gut. Jester performs a backflip after putting his leg over Lethal's head. Jester completes the combo with a beautiful hip toss.
Tenay: "That might have turned the tide! Did you see that tumbleweed!?"
J.R: "Everyone saw it! Jester's heel came down like a gulliotine on Lethal's head! That might have been a knockout shot!"
Jester now has on his feet, giving him powerful right hands. Lethal finally reverses one and hits his Dragon Suplex!
Referee: "1....2....-"
Jester kicks out just before three. Jester just gets to his feet before being sent back down with another EnzuFury. Jester manages to his knees but Lethal charges with a shining wizard attempt. Just before impact, Jester blocks the knee and hoists Lethal onto his shoulders while getting to his feet. Jester spins around in shock, then delivers a J-5(F-5) out of desperation.
J.R: "Oh My God folks! Did you see that power? Jester has a huge chance to win this thing. He's giving it everything he's got, Everything he's got!"
Jester has made it to the top turnbuckle, and waits for Lethal to rise. Rise Lethal does, into a Millenium DDT from Jester C. Jackal. Both men are down and the referee begins the count.
Tenay: "The referee has made it to 5...is anyone going to make it up?"
Jester answers by getting to a vertical base at 6. Lethal manages to get to his feet with assistance from the ropes, at 8. Jay Lethal charges full force at Jester. Jester drops down and catches Jay Lethal with an Akron Homecoming(Jawbreaker) signature! Jay Lethal does fall, but spins around drunkenly, with his head seemingly frozen in place.
Jester gets up and kicks Lethal in the mid-section, then applies a front face lock. Jester shouts to the crowd with his arm raised before connecting with The Final Heaven(Twist of Fate), his finisher. Jester rolls over for the cover.
J.R: "God Almighty! That could do it!"
Tenay: "He drove him straight down with that manuever! Does Jay Lethal have anything left!?"
Referee: "1...2...3!!!"
J.R: "JESTER DID IT. JESTER. JESTER! JESTER WON, GOD ALMIGHTY!"
Borash: "Here is your winner via pinfall..........JESTER...COLT...JACKAL!!!"
"Redefine" by SOiL hits the P.A. again as Jester heads backstage, the crowd clearly liking his display of skills here tonight.
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Post by craigkendo on Mar 12, 2006 5:04:00 GMT -5
*"Halls of Illusion" hits as the Cohln family (all four of them), make their way out to a hugely negative reaction from the crowd.*
Chimel: The following contest is scheduled for one-fall! Making their way to the ring first, to be accompanied to the ring by Deamon Cohln and Heather...from Milan, Michigan, at a total combined weight of 499 pounds...Sever and Jacola...THE COHLNS!
*The Cohlns make their way to the ring, and start their entry. "Ich Will" then hits as The Connection suddenly rush the ring.*
Chimel: Aaaaand their opponents from...
*The Connection, Craig Kendo and Tony Chang, have already entered the ring. Kendo rushes Jacola as Chang sees to Sever. Kendo hits a kick to Jacola, before grabbing him by the head and taking him to the ropes, hitting a chop to the chest. Jacola, hit by the blow, flips over the ropes to the mat below...knocking his face on the canvas...but then angrily grabbing Kendo's ankles and tripping him, before pulling Kendo to the outside!*
*Whilst this is going on, Tony Chang is going at Sever Cohln...Sever fights back, however, and hits a rake to Chang's eyes, grabbing him in an Irish Whip and sending Chang to the ropes...Chang counters with a springboard back elbow to Sever! Chang then performs a nip-up, and then locking in a reverse dragon sleeper to Sever....Sever fights out of it, and gets to his feet, Chang still locking in the sleeper on Sever's back...Sever suddenly grabs a hold of Tony Chang, and flips him over to the mat! Chang clutches at his back as Sever then hits a swift kick to Chang's spine! The crowd boo Sever as he then picks up Chang by the head, and performs an Irish Whip. Chang is sent to the corner...as Sever rushes him with a elbow...Chang counters with a boot to the back, before hopping to the second rope, and leaping onto Sever with a reverse blockbuster!! Chang then goes for the pin!*
1, 2...
*And Sever kicks out! Chang, a little agitated by this, grabs Sever by the head, and sends him to his corner. Chang then tags in Kendo, before lifting Sever to Kendo, who both perform a double powerbomb! Kendo then picks up Sever...but Sever fights back with rib shots! Sever then powers out Kendo, hitting a spinebuster to Kendo! Sever then runs the ropes, and then hits a running senton to Kendo before moving to the Connection's corner, and knocking Chang with a punch...Chang, annoyed at this, tries to enter the ring, but is held back by the ref as Jacola enters the ring! Sever picks Kendo up into a tiger suplex position as Jacola charges Kendo, hitting a dominating clothesline as Sever hits the tiger suplex! Jacola slides out of the ring as Sever keeps the bridge! The referee, now seeing the situation, goes for the count!*
1, 2...
*Tony Chang breaks up the 3 count as the ref berates him to get back to his corner! Chang does so, but reluctantly. Sever taunts Kendo before picking Kendo up by the head...Kendo hits some shots to Sever's gut, recovering slowly but surely...but then Sever hits a quick DDT to keep Kendo down! Sever then picks Kendo up, and sends him with an Irish Whip to the ropes...Kendo ducks a clothesline, before coming back at a none-the-wiser Sever...with an Undertaker flying DDT!!! Both wrestlers are down as Chang tries to get Kendo to come back to the Connection's corner! Kendo comes back...and tags in Chang as Sever tags in Jacola Cohln!!*
*It's a true David versus Goliath match as Chang rushes Jacola with a wheelbarrow attack...followed by a high bulldog!! Chang then rushes the ropes and tries a Lionsault...but Jacola rolls out of the way...as Chang gets to his feet! Jacola gets up...and is met with a calf kick from Tony Chang!! Chang then calls for the Viperbite Kick as Jacola recovers! Sever tries to complain to the ref, but the ref goes to berate Sever...and Heather climbs to the apron and hits Chang with a wrench!! Chang falls to his knees as Jacola gets to his feet. Kendo tries to help, but Deamon Cohln holds him back, and nails a dropkick to Kendo before slamming his head into the metal railing! Jacola then grabs Tony Chang by the throat...and nails a chokeslam! Jacola then goes for the cover as the referee returns to his duties!*
1, 2...
*And Jacola purposefully breaks the count! He tags in Sever as Sever comes in, and picks a limp Chang up by the head! Meanwhilst, both Heather and Deamon are stomping at Kendo to make sure he doesn't recover! Sever drags Chang to the ropes, and then runs up...nailing the Rope Snapper to Chang!!! Sever then goes for the pin!*
1, 2, 3!!!
Winners: The Cohlns!!!
*Post-match, The Cohlns all retreat to the backstage area as Kendo finally makes it to the ring. Holly Vaughn is also there, and maintains her emotionless gaze at the Cohlns. Chang is obviously upset at the whole thing...and Holly sees this...grabbing the referee by the head, and chucking him to the mat! Kendo, rising to his feet, nods at this, developing a large frown. Chang then gets groggily to his feet, and slaps the referee in the face, declaring "IT'S YOUR FAULT!!! YOU WERE ALWAYS DISTRACTED BY THOSE HEATHENS TO SEE THE TRUTH!!! YOU ARE DEFECTIVE!!!"*
*The referee tries to protest...but Holly Vaughn stomps down on the back of the referee's ankle, dropping the ref to his knees! Chang then lifts his leg high...dropping it with the Viperbite Kick!!! With the ref down, the Connection angrily stride out of the ring.*
*We fade to a commercial.*
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Post by kokobware3 on Mar 12, 2006 9:34:22 GMT -5
Jump on It hits and Dr. Insaneo walks out getting booed.
Fink- This match is scheduled for one fall and is for the Toolshed championship…on his way to the ring from Rochester, New York Dr. Insaneo!
Insaneo makes his way to the ring getting booed
Let the Bodies Hit the Floor sounds and Paul Podanski walks out getting a huge pop from the crowd.
Fink- Now making his way to the ring from Birmingham, Alabama, EWT’s Toolshed Champion Paul Podanski!
Paul get into the ring
Insaneo and Podanski lock up to start of the match. Podanski easily powers over Insaneo and throws him to the ground. Insaneo looks at Paul in anger. Insaneo charges at Podanski and they lock up again. This time, again Podanski throws Insaneo to the ground. Insaneo slaps the floor in anger. Insaneo slip out of the ring and looks under the ring for a weapon. When Insaneo comes up he pulls out a trash can. Insaneo slips back in the ring with the trash can in his hand. Insaneo charges right away and swings at Podanski. Podanski ducks and Insaneo misses. Insaneo turns around and is met with a big clothesline from Podanski. Podanski picks up the trash can waiting for Insaneo to get up. When he does Podanski smacks Insaneo with the trash can as hard as he can. Insaneo falls to the ground in a heap. Paul goes for the pin. 1! 2!
NO! Insaneo kicks out right in time before the 3. Paul gets up taking Insaneo with him. Paul picks Insaneo into a scoop slam. Podanski drives Insaneo to the mat. Paul then slips out of the ring looking for another weapon. Podanski goes under the ring and finds a 2x4 and a chair to help out the madness. Podanski throws them into the ring and climbs back in. Insaneo struggles up. Podanski picks up the chair and starts walking towards Insaneo. Insaneo sees that he is coming and delivers a kick to the mid-section of Paul. Insaneo runs to the ropes and but before he can hit Podanski, Paul strikes him with the steel chair! Insaneo falls right to the ground. Paul again goes for the cover. 1! 2!
Just in time! Insaneo gets the shoulder up. Paul drags Insaneo to the corner. Podanski starts to climb up to the top. Paul is now signaling for the Aggravated Paulsault. Podanski jumps off the turnbuckle doing a moonsault. Paul hit the mat hard! Insaneo rolled out of the way in the nick of time. Insaneo then climbs to the middle rope and delivers a small elbow to the chest of Podanski. Insaneo then walks over and grabs the 2x4. Paul slowly makes his way to his feet but is met with a 2x4 shot to the chest from Insaneo. Paul falls to the ground and Insaneo quickly goes for the cover. 1! 2!
NO! Paul lifts the shoulder up and kicks out. Insaneo then waits for Paul to get up. Paul gets to his feet but is met with a spinning heel kick. Paul does not go down but leans against the ropes holding his head. Insaneo the runs to the other side of the ropes and delivers a flying forearm to the head of Podanski. Insaneo then delivers right and left to the skull of Podanski. Paul bounce off the ropes then falls down. Insaneo picks up Podanski and tries for a suplex. Insaneo can’t pick Paul up so instead he settles with a hard DDT. Insaneo goes for the cover. 1! 2!
No! Paul picks his shoulder up and kicks out. Insaneo then gets up and climbs to the top rope. Paul slowly makes his way to his feet. Insaneo launches himself at Podanski looking for a frankensteiner. Paul reverses it into a Paulerbomb! Paul quickly goes for the cover. 1! 2!
3! The bell sounds.
Fink- Winner of the match and STILL Toolshed Champion Paul Podanski!
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Post by The Bad Man on Mar 12, 2006 20:02:29 GMT -5
Terri is walking to her dressing room when she's met up by Moniqua, grinning deviously and petting Fru Fru.
Moniqua: "Caio, darling. I'm glad I found you."
Terri: "Oh really?"
Moniqua: "Si. I wanted you to know that I did not appreciate you booking me to face that dreadful hood rate Tanya Flayre."
Terri: "For the last time, that wasn't me! I had nothing to..."
Moniqua: "Tut, tut! It is fine, my dear. I am not angry anymore. I made a few calls and the matter is closed. We are now, as you would say, even."
Terri: "You made some calls? What are you talking about?"
Moniqua: "An eye for an eye. That is a popular proverb, is it not. You see, I have taken the liberty in booking your next match."
Terri: "You did what?"
Moniqua: "Do not worry. I found the proper opponent for you. You may come out now, darling!"
From around the corner comes D'Zee, who sizes up Terri while flexing her heavily taped right fist. Terri's eyes get wide as Moniqua smugly grins at the turn of events.
D'Zee: "I'm going to crush up your bones and make a fine oriental medication when I'm through with you!"
Terri: "Whoa! Hold on! This isn't right! I'm not a wrestler! How could you do this to me? Does Ultimo know you've thrown me to the wolves? Because if he were here he'd never agree to this!"
Moniqua: "Signore Chocula, he does not know. He has been, shall we say, indisposed."
We flash over to the cafeteria where UC, decked out in a super fine Italian three piece suit, working a Snoopy Sno Cone machine with the enthusiasm of a seven year old. Flash back to the three ladies
Moniqua: "Terri, my dear. We are even now. I will let you and D'Zee make your acquaintances now."
Fru Fru: "Yip!"
Moniqua turns and walks out a nearby door. D'Zee walks right up to Terri and backs her against the wall. She looks down on Terri, intimidating her.
Terri: "Hold on! This is a mistake! I'm not a wrestler!"
D'Zee: "I don't care if you're a wrestler or not. I don't care if you've got a black belt in judo, you trained in Stu Hart's dungeon, if you've done time in the UFC, it don't matter. I got you. I own you. And when I get you in the ring, I'm going to make an example out of you. I'm going to show those b****es in the GND division what I'm about. You know what I'm about? Pain!"
With that D'Zee slams her fist into the wall behind Terri, scaring her half to death. D'Zee laughs and walks away leaving Terri a shivering mess.
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Post by #Classic Hi-Definition X on Mar 12, 2006 21:46:58 GMT -5
*Cut to ringside*
Oh oh Bret...
Ring Announcer: The following contest is scheduled for one fall. Introducing first, being accompanied by the Heartbreak Hitman Bret Michaels, from Sacramento, California, "Sensational" Cherry!
*As "Sexy Guy" is blaring throughout the arena, HBH walks out with Cherry slowly behind her. She is obviously scared of getting in the ring, and the crowd is certainly not helping with a chorus of boos. But HBH tries to console her and tell her that everything will be OK*
RA: And her opponent, from Dallas, Texas, Wendi Richter!
*Wendi walks out and gets a nice pop from fans. She shakes hands with some of them on the way to the ring. Meanwhile HBH and Cherry are going over their strategy*
The bell rings to start the match. Chants of "SHE'S A HO!" are directed at Cherry. The two women lock up. Wendi does a headlock takedown. She picks Cherry up and takes her to the corner. She gives her 10 punches and then a monkey flip. Wendi covers her.
1... 2...
Cherry kicks out. Wendi picks her up and body slams her. She runs to the ropes, but is tripped on the outside by HBH. This draws loud boos from fans. Wendi gets up and is met with a weak clothesline from Cherry. Cherry picks up Wendi by the hair and throws her around. Next she whips her to the ropes and kicks her in the stomach. Cherry follows that up with a swinging neckbreaker. She pins Wendi.
1... 2...
Wendi kicks out. Cherry picks her up and gives her a snapmare by the hair. Then she gives lady-like stomps. She whips her to the ropes, but Wendi hits her with a Lou Thesz press. She capitalizes with a couple of armdrags and then a back body drop. She climbs to the ropes and nails a flying clothesline. She goes for a cover, but HBH gets on the apron to distract the referee. HBH gets off as soon as Wendi runs at him. Cherry gets up and tosses Wendi out of the ring. While she distracts the ref, HBH hits her with some Sweet Chin Muzak. He then picks her up and rolls her into the ring. Cherry covers her.
1... 2...
3! *Bell rings*
RA: Here is your winner, "Sensational" Cherry!
*HBH celebrates with Cherry in the ring. Fans are so outraged that they start throwing trash into the ring. More chants of "SHE'S A HO!" start to break out. HBH and Cherry head backstage*
*Cut to a commercial*
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DQorDie
Bubba Ho-Tep
Believe in yourself & ROCK N ROLL!!!
Posts: 635
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Post by DQorDie on Mar 12, 2006 22:06:45 GMT -5
The locale is the hallway of an unnamed hospital. Unnamed because frankly the EWT didn’t have the cash to put up to mention their friggin’ name instead all proceeds lately have been going into Delicious Dick thong underwear & Senor Splash keg koozies. Well regardless, the scene is frantic as nurses & doctors rush Mrs. Podanski & Delicious Dick along with the rest of the PsychaDeli (minus Paraslice), dressed in medical scrubs, into the ER. Amid the chaos & calamity is crack EWT broadcast journalist, Sean Mooney.Sean Mooney: Whoah! Hi, everybody. I’m Sean Mooney & being rushed into that ER was the EWT’s own PsychaDeli Albeit the former Toolshed Champion, Paraslice, is not amongst the ranks today. Although it has been only a matter of over a month & change Mama Podanski is about to pop. Let’s see if we can get inside & get an EWT exclusive of this birth. Mooney begins walking up to the doorway. The cameraman follows. The creek open the door. Within that small passage a wall of moans can be heard as members of the PsychaDeli have caught a glimpse of Mama Podanski’s cooch. Such an unpleasing site rendors them to shrieking out the phonetic pronounciation of the letter e meaning, “AAAAAAAHHHH!!!!!” Yet the bigest scream of all is coming from Mama Podanski herself. Just before Sean & the crew can get any further their attempt is thrwarted. Not before they stare awkwardly at the doctor. Oddly enough it’s the Curious Dr. Hump featuring a large hump in his pants that resembles a FUPA.The Curious Doctor Hump: Don’t hate me for my obscenely large genitals. It’s a genetic condition....I swear....It wasn’t me performing plastic surgery on myself & it backfired!....I swear. Believe me....Believe me!!! It’s all written down somewhere. *searches his scrubs but stops & stares at them* Oh don’t believe me huh? HUH?! NURSE get them out right now! Expel them immediately! We have a zit ready to pop & we need no distractions! SM: What but we’re from the Extreme Wrestlecrap Threaderation! I’m Sean Mooney! Nurse: Sir, I understand, but you are not allowed in this area. I am going to have to ask for you two to leave. SM: What?! Listen ya dumb broad?! DO YOU KNOW WHO I AM?! I’M SEAN MOONEY!!! And if you don’t quit yappin & let us in so A MAN can do his job I may just have to cave in those gums of yours? Now how about them apples? As soon as Mooney looks back at his cameraman chuckling & giving the thumbs up the nurse pulls up her sleeve revealing a freakishly huge forearm complete with arm hair & anchor tattoo. Mooney turns around to face the nurse to find this startling fact. This stifles him out the door which is slammed in his face.SM: *holding his face now turns to the camera* S##t.....We’re gonna keep on trying folks. Muthaf##KER!!! Fade to commercial.We’re back as Mooney is dressed up as a Little Ceasar’s pizza delivery guy. Adorned in full toga & baseball cap with the laurel around it he walks in with the camera man underneath the box as there is a hole cut in the bottom of the box so once open it can view everything.SM: Man, this is a great idea. They’re all fat! And fat people love pizza! Camera Man: Well what about the fact that you put the friggin’ pizza over the camera lense? AND even if the pizza was cut for the camera we’d still be getting shots of their fat round pock marked faces & the ceiling! And there’s grease leaking all over my camera & my head. I’ve got more grease on me than an obese 14 year old sweating in the lunch line for more tater tots! SM: Trust me. It’ll work out. Here put on this towel to cover it up! Camera Man: *grabs the towel handed to him by Mooney & puts it on. The camera shakes around as he does.* The last time I trusted someone it was Jake the Snake & look what happened to me! An alternate shot occurs revealing that the camera man is indeed the Ultimate Warrior!SM: Ooooh....Crap......I forgot.....Uuuuuh.....Well........If it makes you feel better I ordered that personal workout cassette of yours for $200. Ultimate Warrior: Hey! Only one guy mailed out for it & never paid...Wait a second....So YOU’RE HUGH G. RECTION! And you never sent me MY money! I want my money! SM: Dude, I’ll give it to ya when they tip us. Ultimate Warrior’s Thoughts: *camera pans in on his face* Jeez, I know he’s lying. He’s not gonna give it to me. Damn, I hate when people do stuff like that. They make up a blatant lie & say it right in front of yer face....Then again maybe he’s telling the truth. Maybe he’s just under some pressure to get this thing filmed. Maybe.... SM: C’MON!!! They bust the doors open as Sean Mooney walks in holding a box of Little Caesar’s pizza with Ultimate Warrior underneath the box toweled up.SM: We’re here to deliver a pizza for uuuh....the PsychaDeli. Uuuuh....it’s Hawaiian pizza too! Mama P is screaming her lungs out as if the baby was coming out her warehouse truck entrance of a mouth. Mama P tries to roll out of the bed grabbing for the pizza but Dick puts on the brakes pushing her back in yet at the same time extends out one of his arms to grab it. But ahead of him is Senor Splash who tackles both men.Senor Splash: Aloha brudda! The Superfat really loves....cake...I mean....pie....PIZZA PIE! UW: *who I now in plain site with struggling with Splash on top of him* AAAAH HE’S TRYING TO EAT THE CAMERA!!!! I can’t breathe! Get him off me! The seems in his spandex tights are about to burst! AAAH ODD JOBS AT MINIMUM WAGE AN HOUR WON’T MAKE MY WORLD WORK!!! The Curious Doctor Hump: What the? Nurse please expel these men from here! Mrs. Podanski is no state to be experiencing this. And see if you can save a slice for me! I love pineapple. In true cartoon style both Mooney & the Warrior are booted out of the emergency room. A loud belch is heard & Warrior’s camera flies out the door with them hitting Mooney right in the head.UW: Hey my camera! It’s got bile all over it & I still had 5 more payments at Radio Shack! EW! AND AN UNDIGESTED REGGIE BAR!!! They haven’t made Reggie Bars in years! Jeez! SM: Shut up & shut it off! We gotta employ..... UW: Oh no! SM: Oh yes.... PLAN C!UW: Oh God no! And I’m sure I know what the “C” stands for. Let’s get this over with. SM: Haha oh yeah! As soon as the camera is shut off it immediately is turned back on. Upon further inspection we see that it’s later & both men are now in cheetah print thongs & bow ties. Sean Mooney is in view.SM: So Warrior, how do I look? *adjust his bow tie* UW: *grumbles* Mooney, you know how I feel about this. SM: Yeah. Yeah. I remember. Anyway, get ready. They gotta fall for this...especially that nurse! Who can resist a strip-a-gram? UW: Oh I don’t know the predominately male to female ratio inside that room. SM: Well if it’ll make you feel better I heard some of them are....*motions his right hand down & up* UW: Huh?! Ooookay....Anyway....Where are we gonna put the camera? If this is a strip-o-gram than how are we gonna hide the camera? SM: Glad you asked.....That’s why I brought this along! Mooney goes into the next hallway & returns with another MAN!UW: Mooney, what the hell is this? SM: A man. UW: No s##t. But what in Apollo is he doing here? SM: Well he’s not just any man. He’s a....CAMERA MAN! UW: WHAT!!!! ? New Camera Man: Ey buddy, how’s it going? Hey, aren’t you that Renegade guy? My favorite match was when you beat Paul Orndorff. Man, I hated Pretty Wonderful especially Paul Roma. SM: Listen Warrior. We’re gonna play it off like we’re filming it for them. Like a peice to remember the experience by! UW: Oh God...Now what about desguises? They already know what we look like. SM: Gotcha broham. Totally prepared! That’s why I brought this. Now suit up...Or should I say stache up! Warrior examines the box handed to him by Mooney. The box says:
“Rollie Fingers Costume Kit: Included are:
1 Barbershop Quartet Handle Bar Mustache 1 Wig Featuring “Hat Hair” 1 Oakland A’s baseball cap.
Don’t Wait For Next Halloween “Stache” Up & Get a Free Rollie Fingers Signed Case of Rolaids. Don’t Get Fingered Without ‘Em.UW: Ugh, sick! And you even used the lame catch phrase on the box. SM: C’mon I promise this is the last time? UW: For real? SM: For real! UW: Pinky swea? SM: Pinky swear *does the pinky swear* UW: OK! But this is the last time! SM: Alright now let’s stache up! UW: * as he places on his mustache, wig, & the hat!* Ugh, that ludicrous line. Makes the fire’s of Dante ravage my entrails to the peak of vociferous sound in the bollows of my fisting palpitations that I can no longer rest in the arms of Morpheus! DEBAUCHERY OF THY NAME!!! SM: Hey I heard of the whole goth thing. My daughter went through it with the face paint & the whining in Latin, but this is something totally different! And don’t forget in this state men going fully nude is OK. So we gotta deliver the goods! Well you got the body for it so you have nothing to worry about. UW: Wait....We’re going...... Immediately Mooney pushes Warrior into the room. The camera man follows as Mooney leads.SM: *in a lousy attempt at a sexy voice* Wooooo! Video Strip-a-Gram for Mrzzzzzzzzz. Podanski. HIT THE MUSIC!!! Nothing happens as Mooney instructs the camera man to bring the boom box & press play. The camera man says, “Oh.” & goes out & brings in the boom box. He presses play & a familiar beat emanates from the speakers.....Boom Box: Honey, ah sugar sugar You are my candy girl And you've got me wanting you SM: To Mrs P from Big Dick. May your vagina not hurt so much in this sexy birth & if it’s a miscarriage I’m leavin’! But if it’s a C-Section you gotta try to get plastic surgery and if it’s a freak I promised Splash he could eat it! Delicious Dick: I said all that? Senor Splash: *rubs his belly hair* Si! Si! The song continues on as Sean Mooney & the Ultimate Warrior begin dancing around everyone as they look on in shock & disgust...except Mrs. P who is screaming for her life & Senor Splash who begins dancing along with them. Splash is beginning to get too close to the Warrior. The Warrior stops & pushes him back. He stumbles over to Dick who slaps him across the back of his mask. Splash falls face first & makes “the whiny kid about to cry” look. The pull him back up just in time for Mooney & Warrior to do the coup de gras. SM: You ready Renegade? UW: WHAT DID YOU CALL ME!?! BY THOR’S HAMMER I WILL!!!! Mooney rips off the Warrior’s thong to reveal......
Nothing.........
It’s all just empty space......
And it’s shaved too!Everyone: UGH! Delicious Dick: Seems like Thor forgot his hammer at the palace. Bilskirnir in the kingdom Thrudheim or Thrudvang. Either one is exceptable. Salami Swami: Oh my goodness! Such years of steroid abuse has left him with nothing....Literally! Senor Splash: Jeez meng.....Just like his tights at de SummerSlam 92! It’s creepy! But his physique is still quite impressive. Ol’ King Cold Cuts: sdsdsdsdKUKLUIOIUjsJZJkhkxj *his mumbling translates into “Dude! He’s got a MANGINA!” Everyone roars in laughter at the Warrior as he tries to explain. But all is lost as Mrs. P drowns everyone out!Mrs. Podanski: I’M ABOUT TO POP OUT A LITTER!!!! The Curious Dr. Hump: EMERGENCY C-SECTION!!! Nurse hand me the chainsaw. *The nurse revs it up for him & hands it off* Aaah Binford. A fine choice. Now turn around everyone because I forgot to add it in the hospital contract about messing up especially since I’m o gosh darn curious. So if you didn’t see me do it than I didn’t. Now turn around or there will be no special prophesized baby coming out of this rather obese & disgusting woman. Alright?! Everyone: *with their heads tilted down, hands behind their backs, & rubbing one of their feet along the floor *Ooooh OK. The Curious Dr. Hump lets all hell loose as he carves into Mrs. P. As soon as he crack open the belly welly a strange green fog emanates from her digestive system. It lets an odor that could only equal that of a hobo run sewage plant. The Curious Dr. Hump is knocked for a loop. The Nurse consoles Dr. Hump in her Popeye-esque arms & sees what information she can get out of him.Nurse: Doctor, what did you see? Is it a boy or is it a girl. The Curious Dr. Hump: Aaah! Foul odor. Never. Knew. Woman. Could. Smell like that....She can’t be human! FOUL BEAST!!! Out of all the horror Senor Splash takes a stand. He makes his way through the thick green fog as a familiar tune can be heard. He walks past the doctor & up to Mrs. P who has ceased her screams. He goes deep into the green fog & digs his hands in.
As soon as the fog clears he lifts the child up as that familiar tune is revealed as “The Circle of Life” by Elton John obscenely recreating the scene in the Lion King. But something isn’t fitting right...This child....This infant.....is wearing....
A FISHING HAT!
The camera pans in on the shocked people in the ER.Senor Splash: *with child still raised above his arms* He’s born with a hat! That means he’s a freak! SO I GET TO EAT HIM!!! Splash snaps into the umbilical cord like a Slim Jim & begins munching it down slowly getting to the child. Splash inches in as his eyes get wider & wider the closer the child gets.Delicious Dick: *nabbing the baby* WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING!!! This is not a freak.....This is a very auspicious moment.....This is....... WILSON! THAT SON OF A B###H SCREWED MY GIRL!!!!! Before Dick can walk over to Mrs. P. The Wilson child is immediately taken from him by....DRUIDS!!
Three Druids stand in front of the doorway with the Wilson child. 2 in front & one tall one behind them. Their heads are covered so who they are can not be seen. The one from behind begins to speak.Druid #1: Correction....Wilson did not screw that bovine sloth. But something more miraculous did occur. *One of the druids hands the child over to him* In my hands is not a average child but.....a savior. This child will lead us. Delicious Dick: What us? Who the heck are you? Druid #1: Not us as in everyone in this room. Us as in the druids....As for who I am....I am a student of this child. As are all of us....druids. WA LA!!! The arch druid rips off the hoods of the henchmen druids to reveal............
BRAD & RANDY TAYLOR!!!!Senor Splash: Dios mio! The Taylor bambinos! The arch druid slowly takes off his hood to reveal that he is indeed....MARK TAYLOR!!!
Dramatic marching music plays as the Taylor druids exit the room.Delicious Dick: HEY YOU GUYS!!! COOOOOME BACK!!!! COOOOOME BAAAACK!!!!!!! Salami Swami: *puts his arm on Dick* Please....They are not coming back. Delicious Dick: They’re not? Why not? Salami Swami: Because people never come back when people yell that....especially under these circumstances. Delicious Dick: Oh crap.....I forgot. And chances are they probably already caught the elevator down. Crap.....Because of that.......Yeah....Yeah....JUST FOT THAT!!! WE’RE NOT RASSLIN’ ANYMORE!!! THE PSYCHADELI WILL NEVER RASSLE AGAIN.....Just to spite them! Everyone in the Deli shrugs their shoulders & agrees.Salami Swami: Maybe now I can write that book I’ve always wanted to. Ol’ King Cold Cuts: JHKJ<JHBmnmnbsdmnbsdu9ouw099 *translates to: “Now I can play the lottery for a living” Senor Splash: Hmmm..Maybe I can go back to jr. high eschuelo & get that degree I’ve always wanted-o & make something of myself. Or maybe I’ll just make myself a sandwich at the Deli Mmmm. Delicious Dick: As for me & Mrs. P we’re gonna get hitched & live on a house boat....Just like in that movie! But hey...Speaking of the actual Deli itself....I wonder where Paraslice is. Ever since the lost the guy has just been off the face of the map! Meanwhile......................................................At the PsychaDeli.
Paraslice standing on a chair hooking up a hangman’s noose made out of Polish sausage links. Paraslice puts his head in the hole & prepares for the wurst.Paraslice: I failed my brother....I failed my family....I failed the PsychaDeli. And with no one too mooch off of & no one to live-in with....Now all is left is for me to have a sweet tasting & ever so salty suicide. Good bye cruel world......... Before Paraslice can take the big plunge. A light bulb goes on over his head! & it immediately falls down & cracks over his head. He yells, “F### IT!” & jumps!!!
The Polish Sausage noose gives way leading Paraslice to fall face first on the ground & not die. Paraslice: CRAP! I even failed at killing myself! Ugh.....Hey! I can always burn down the Deli for insurance money! YEAH! Let’s do it! Paraslice runs to the back & pulls out every container of gasoline he can find. He begins pouring it all over the place laughing gleefully all the way. Paraslice: Man, why didn’t I think of this before! This’ll be great! Living the high life in Amsterdam. The traveling to France to have toast & fries. Then to England to meet those creepy British bastards. Man this is gonna be great. *pulls out a book of matches* Well alls well that ends well. So much for Peace, Love, & Pastramy. Well I can always get that with my new INSURANCE MONEY! Wooo hooo! Times a wasting! Paraslice lights up the matches & begins throwing them in all directions. The flames spark & begin to grow. The grow higher & higher as Paraslice’s elation grows with it. The flames grow all around him. He is in a state of ecstacy until....Paraslice: Oooooh crap. I DON’T HAVE INSURANCE!!!!The camera pans off as we see a huge explosion go off......
A mushroom cloud forms as the sun leads the way in waving goodbye to Paraslice & the PsychaDeli.
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DQorDie
Bubba Ho-Tep
Believe in yourself & ROCK N ROLL!!!
Posts: 635
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Post by DQorDie on Mar 12, 2006 22:07:34 GMT -5
The fans are going nuts ready for some more EWT action. But before we go back to the ring Gorilla & the Body indulge us with a verbal assault. The camera pans on them as Gorilla adjusts his bow tie & jumps right into it.
Gorilla Monsoon: Hi everybody & welcome back for some more high-flying EWT action. But before we go any further I must address the fact that there have been a lot of rumors flying around the locker room, Jess, & they involve your guy, the Genetic Superfreak, Flex Magnificent
Jesse “The Body” Ventura: That’s SUPERMAN, MonSOOOON. Genetic SUPERMAN And let me tell you something, Gorilla, there are rumors flying around the locker room & it is all centered around the EWT’s crown jewel, Flex Magnificent. And being the broadcast journalist I am I have the scoop, Monsoon. So go ahead & ask me what it is.
GM: OK, well what is going on with Flex Magnificent?
JV: Why the hell should I tell you? Hahaha.
GM: Oh brother. Well is there anything you can tell us, Jess?
JV: Well Gorilla, how about we have the man himself speak on this? In fact he’s due any minute.
GM: You heard it hear folks, Flex Magnificent with a big announcement. *the choir is already set as they begin bursting into “Hallelujah ”* Whoah Here he comes now. Let’s go to the ringside to find out what all these speculations are all about
Flex & Dr. Delavier pop out from out of the curtain dressed up in some classy 3-peice suits. Flex with a pin-stripe & Delavier with something McMahon-ish, a grey blazer with yellow shirt & a pair of dark brown slacks. No tie except on Flex.
They casually make their way down the aisle escorted by the Flexettes accompanied by a pair of big toothy grins on each gentleman.
They make their way up the steps as 2 Flexettes hold open the ropes for them so they may enter. Waiting in the ring is Mean Gene Okerlund ready to speak to both men.
Mean Gene Okerlund: Ladies & Gentlemen unbeknownst to many fans out there there has been a rumor spreading quickly in the locker room involving these two men in the ring with me right now. And Flex Magnificent you requested this time my friend so how about it? What is this big news you have planned?
Before Flex can speak the crowd already erupts in a roar of boos & “HE CAN’T WRESTLE *clap clap clap clap clap*” chants. Flex looks around at the crowd & gives a Rock eyebrow sneering at the audience. His demeanor changes as his face begins to turn beet red. He looks nervous yet pissed at the fans’ attempt to ruin his moment. Dr. Delavier places his palms over his shoulders & whispers in his ear. Flex shakes the crowd’s response & adjusts his tie. A smile once again adorns his face. Silence overcomes the crowd.
Flex Magnificent: Listen polidely *the fans take a good shot & once again erupt in louder boos * AT WUT I HUV DO SAY MEAN GENE Let me make it magkneeficently clear......FLEX MAGKNEEFICENT NOR DE DOCKTOR OF MUSKLETOLOGY WILL BE FURTHER EMPLOYEED BY THE EWT As we huv found brighter horizons in the unfolding of ManiFlex Destiny.
The fans are elated with joy as they burst out into a chorus of “Na Na Na Na Hey-Ey Goodbye.” Flex is getting quite purturbed as he roles his eyes & paces back from Mean Gene & the mic. Dr. Delavier covers Flex’s ears for him while Flex puts his hands to his hips.
FM: Excu....*walks away from the mic again as the fans are totally unrelenting at this point. Flex gives it another go und approaches Mean Gene again.* ALDOUGH I KNO’ MY LEGION OF FUNS WILL MISS ME I WILL BE GONE BUT NOT FORGOTTEN
The fans go back to booing Flex as Mean Gene intervenes.
MG: Gone but not forgotten? What is that suppose to mean? What do you have up your sleeve, Flex Magnificent?
FM: I will dell you, Mean Jeans. You see I am moving on in dee wurl. In fact my career here in de EWT has skyrocketed me do supuhstardum.In fact I will be STARRING in Peter Jackson’s latest 4-hour motion pictcha epic.
MG: Holy cow Peter Jackson? The director of Lord of the Rings & King Kong? That’s incredible What will be his latest picture & what role will you be playing in it? If you don’t mind me asking.
FM: No, I do nut min’, Mean Jeans. In fact I yam quite proud und honored do say that I will be playing de role of Detective John Kimbel in Peter Jackson’s 4-hour remake of “Kindergarten Cop.”[/I] In fact I huv a clip of it. Led us go do de clip. Role it
The clip begins with Flex in a classroom full of children acting like pains in the ass as always. A dramatic Phillip Glass score plays as a small child walks up to Flex with tears in his eyes.
Kid: Mr. Kimbel what is the difference between boys & girls?
All of a sudden a Japanese Kamikaze fighter plane piloted by a T-Rex bursts right through the classroom.
FM: CHILDRUN, GET DOOOWN
Flex grabs the kids in time & ushers them into the coat closet.....ALL OF THEM UNSCAVED
Flex holds the child closes in his muscular bossom & says to the kid.
FM: Billy......If we must die I wunt you do know one ting......Boys have a penis und girls have a vagina
The clip fades back into the arena which is responded by a chorus of boos.
Fans begin chanting “HE CAN’T ACT ” *clap clap clap clap clap*
MG: 4- Hours of this ? No one would watch that even if you shoveled that sh......
Mean Gene stops in his tracks & takes a big gulp as Flex gets right up in Gene’s face.
MG: I mean...uuuh....What a pleasant surprise. I’m sure it’ll break all sorts of records *Flex’s begins snorting like a raging bull as Mean Gene has to think quick to save himself from this mess*.....uuuuuh.....JUST LIKE YOU BROKE MAELSTROM’S BACK LAST SUNDAY
FM: *Flex’s rage turns to joy as Flex pulls back und slaps Gene on the back knocking him to the floor leaving Delavier to grab the mic to hoist up to Flex* Haha you are exacly right, Jeans. Yet another casualty do Maniflex Destiny. Fish Monger you were no challenge. All dose draws you got on me was pure luck. When it finally came down do it you choked LITERALLY as I baited the line, hooked you in, BROKE YOU IN TWO, und thruw you buck indo the s##t ridden river where you belong. This my friend is yo new aquarium. But in all fairness you huv joined an elite club my friend which is noting to be ashamed about. A club dat is headed by an EWT Hall of Famer. Und dat man is Psycho Ape Guy. Wut is de name of dat club you ask? Well it is simply called de Flex Magkneeficent Killed My Career club und much like de baby seals who get clubbed everyday by steel hearted men you can enjoy de rest of yo career retinking yo existence. Because frankly Jeans.....Some men are made to be mortal und some men were born indo immortality. Fish Monger you huv only one claim dat I huv und dat is both men are leaving de EWT but unlike me all you huv do look forward do is Lay’s Potato Chip smoothies being sucked indo yo veins as you watch reruns of de Price is Right. But Male Strum de price was wrong fo you und trying do be de hero came at a high price unfortunately one you couldn’t pay.
The fans let Flex have it for those comments as it takes a slight pause.
FM: Und as far as de fans go I will be glad do be performing fo people who on de silver screen who appreciate wut ManiFlex Destiny does for dem each und every single moment of de day. Before coming indo de EWT I hud no clue dat dis was a charity case because each und every week I am performing for people dat should have been aborted a long time agooo. In fact I am positively sho’ dat de family members of dese fans must have tried to get it done, but de doctor turned dem away saying it was TOO LATE *crowd boos getting real heated up* If dere is one ting dat Flex Magkneeficent does not do it is charity cases. I huv no respect fo people who can’t climb up stairs, who can’t feed demselves, und huv no considerashun fo us normal functioning people. If I could huv it my way I’d ship you all do a deserted island one particularly infested with monsters so I’d nevuh huv do deal wit you kind again. Speaking of kinds dere are many kinds of people who I’d like fo you do join you people. For instance the......
Flex’s interview is cut short as from out of nowhere....Well actually from behind the curtain walks out a large group of people who look similiar to the ones on the Mark Twain Riverboat scoping out the atmosphere looking particularly angry.
Ring Leader: HEY There he is LYNCH MOB
They all bust out flaming torches & hangmen’s nooses as Flex & Dr. Delavier take a big gulp & hop the top rope.
The Benny Hill theme begins playing as the mob begins chasing Flex & Dr. Delavier in fast motion around the arena. They go around the crowd & back down the aisle. Flex & Dr. Delavier roll under the ring as do the entire lynch mob. Flex comes out the left hand side while Delavier pops out the ride hand side. The lynch mob comes out the front looking for them. They see them as Flex & Delavier hop the guard rails of each side that they’re on. The mob splits up following both men.
The mob runs past some fans sitting in attendance. In particular we see a beautiful sitting down minding her own business. Yet the lynch mob catches her attention, but that attempt is thrawted as she notices something awkward is going on. Out of her blouse pops out Dr. Delavier’s head. She screams in horror as Dr. Delavier has managed to slide into her clothes via her skirt & is making his way out the blouse. Being the muscle man he also is he bursts out of her clothes leaving her completely naked.. She covers herself up with her arms as a little kid walks by with two ice cream cones. Delavier puts his PhD to work as he uses to cones to shove on her breasts to cover ‘em up. The woman is totally appalled with this yet gets even more appalled as Dr. Delavier grabs a giant foam finger & motions it towards her low nether regions. She immediately slaps him with the other hand & realizes it was the hand she used to cover up that nether regions. She’s shocked & covers up again just in time for the mob to catch up with Delavier who is way ahead & is back on the run.
Flex in the meantime is in the hallway & runs into a closet. The mob doesn’t see this & continues running down the corridor. As soon as they’re gone Flex immediately bursts down the door as a man on with a Rollie Fingers mustache on a late 1800's looking bike with the huge front wheel is chasing after him. Immediately the lynch mob is back on their tail.
Delavier is no worse for wear as is being chased by the mob & the naked women holding onto her privates. Delavier stops at a corner & watches as the mob & girl run right by him. He wipes his brow from the sweat & sees a near by banana. He peels it & takes a bite & has a smile on his face as he chews. Out from behind a crate pops out a guy dressed in a gorilla suit. He pounds his chest & begins the chase anew as the mob & girl follow suit. Flex & Delavier rejoin in the parking lot as the mob, the girl, the 1800's bicyclist, & the ape suit guy chase them around. Flex & Delavier find their car & search for the keys. They find the right one & get into the car quickly. As quickly as they got in they run out as the mob, girl, ape guy, & 1800s bicyclist comes pouring out of the car.
They begin running into various cars & coming out of various cars as various members of each party pop out.
Flex & Delavier begin hightailing it for the highway as cars fly off the road & crash into each other, all the while being followed by the lynch mob, girl, 1800s bicyclist, ape, AND NOW old British bobby. Flex, Dr. Delavier & the group keep running down the highway until they begin to disapear. As they become tiny ants on the screen the sun sets in the horizon.
Fade to commercial.
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Post by dorf on Mar 12, 2006 23:15:47 GMT -5
*Back from commercial, Tony Chimmel stands in the ring having an announcement for our next match.*
Chimmel: *Dorf’s new music plays* Coming down to the ring, weighing in at 266 pounds, from Filthadelphia Pencilvania, he was a former EWT World Heavyweight Champion, I give you DORF!
*Dorf comes out to a loud chorus of boos and a chant of ‘YOU KILLED ADAMS!’ Trash and other litter was starting to be thrown at Dorf, but he ignores the trash being thrown at him, even the half cup of cola splashing into his face. Dorf looks determined to win the match heartily as he struts down the ramp, still with litter being thrown at him. Dorf then out of nowhere sprinted right into the ring, dodging a bunch of litter being thrown by the crowd. Dorf gets in the ring right away and starts throwing right hands at Abdullah the Butcher as the match starts*
*Bell rings: Ding, ding, ding!*
*Dorf gives straight right hands to Abdullah as he pressures him to the ropes. Dorf then gave The Butcher an Irish Whip and takes him down with a Clothesline. Dorf flexes to the crowd, which prompted the boo’s and the ‘YOU KILLED ADAMS!’ chant. Dorf runs to the ropes and once he flinged back, he connected with a Leg Drop to Abdullah the Butcher. Dorf covers*
Referee: 1…………………………………………….2………………………………………..*Abdullah kicks out*
*Dorf then got up right away and made Abdullah stand up. Dorf turns to his back and executes the Dorf-plex perfectly. Dorf is about to cover, as somebody right under the CrapTron appears as the cameras focus over there. It was the HOSS NINJA that helped saved Dorf’s life at the ‘it’s a small world’ match from Freek Show. The stealthy ninja trounces to the ring and keeps distracting Dorf. The hoss ninja exclaims by using his FINGER POINT OF DOOM to point Dorf to turn around. Dorf shrugs his shoulders, not understanding what the Hoss Ninja is saying. Dorf thinks the Hoss Ninja wants to beat up Dorf. The Hoss Ninja then signaled a Swirly with the FINGER POINT OF DOOM at Dorf. Dorf signaled to beat up the Hoss Ninja, but Abdullah grabbed Dorf’s tights and brought him down into a Schoolboy, the referee counts*
Referee: 1…………….*Abdullah uses ropes*…………………….2………….*Hoss Ninja removes Abdullah’s feet to the ropes*…………….*Dorf barely kicks out, as the Hoss Ninja claps*
*Abdullah then got up right away and signaled to do the DDT and was about to, until Dorf would not give, so Abdullah uses two or three right hands to club onto Dorf’s back to weaken him. It did not work as Dorf gave a Stiff Back Body Drop to Abdullah the Butcher as both competitors are down. The referee does his ten count routine to prevent a double count-out.*
Referee: 1…2…3…4…5..*both begin to stir a little as the Hoss Ninja cheers Dorf on*…6! *Both competitors are up at the same time as the Hoss Ninja is still clapping for Dorf; but Dorf believes still that the clapping is on Abdullah. The two competitors in the ring stare vehmothly, tired and weary…although able to compete still.*
*Dorf slowly walks up to Abdullah with a straight right hand to his chest…a few seconds later, Abdullah strikes back with another slow right. Dorf comes back with a right of his own four seconds later…and some time after that, Abdullah does the same. This gets the crowd riled up as Abdullah punches Dorf at his chest in succession as the crowd is getting louder. The Hoss Ninja steps to the apron and tries to enter the ring, but the referee stops him at halfway. Seeing this, Abdullah takes Dorf down with a stiff right hand of his own and walks to where the referee is confronting. Even though the Hoss Ninja is arguing with the referee…somehow he must be smiling somewhere inside…maybe where his soul once was.*
*Abdullah and the Hoss Ninja were having some choice words now as he wanted to get involved. The distraction disabled the beatdown onto Dorf as Dorf is now up as a result. Dorf prepares for a Spear as soon as Abdullah turned around, but Dorf did not wait…he ran and sprinted with a Helacious Spear of his own, knocking down both Abdullah the Butcher and the Hoss Ninja. Dorf would think to cover…but no, he does not. He drags Abdullah’s carcass to the corner as Dorf climbs to the second rope and picks up Abdullah the Butcher to perform the Dorf Driver. Dorf excuted it perfectly and attempted to pin him.
Referee: 1……………………………………….2……………………………*Dorf lifts Abdullah’s shoulder up*
*Dorf shakes his head ‘no’ and tells the referee “not yet.” Dorf gets right up and made Abdullah the Butcher stand up as well. Dorf goes to a limp back of Abdullah and performed a stiff Dorf-plex as Abdullah landed wrong. A crazy look is shown upon Dorf as he signals the match is not over yet. Dorf gets up and made Abdullah The Butcher stand up as Dorf Irish Whips him to the ropes; once Abdullah flung back around, Dorf did his best Dorfbuster to date. He covers Abdullah again.*
Referee: 1……………………………………...2……………………………………3!
Winner: by pinfall, DORF!
*After gettings his hand raised by the referee, Dorf went outside the ring and went under the ring to receive a Steel Table. A ‘YOU KILLED ADAMS!’ chant subsequently starts. Dorf got the Steel Table and shoves it into the ring…lying to a now bloody Abdullah The Butcher. Dorf gets right back into the ring as Abdullah appears to be knocked out. Dorf sets out the Steel Table as the Hoss Ninja is slowly getting up. Dorf places Abdullah the Butcher onto the table and gets on the table. He makes Abdullah stand up and just then the Hoss Ninja sees the side where it looks like Abdullah is taking advantage of Dorf…so the Hoss Ninja stealthily enters the ring ignoring the fact that Dorf was doing a Dorf-plex to Abdullah. It dented the table in half as Dorf celebrated the newly, dented table.*
*Just as soon as Dorf dusted his hands, he turns around and sees the Hoss Ninja up and Dorf then runs away as if he just saw a ghost. The Hoss Ninja just shrugged his sholders and points at Dorf. Dorf just tapers off somewhere as the camera fades for commercial.*
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Post by Trik Turner on Mar 13, 2006 9:38:00 GMT -5
(Trik Turner makes his way to the ring & grabs the microphone.)
I know I was scheduled to face X-pac this week. But, you see...he seems to have run into a bit of a problem this week. A female problem, if you catch my drift.
(ToomiTron shows X-Pac backstage with Chyna.)
But, he still has to do what he has to do. And HitmanMark, let this be an example to you.
(Trik climbs out of the ring & heads backstage. He nails X-Pac from behind with a clothesline. Trik then starts laying the boot to X-Pac. Trik lifts him up, throwing him into the wall. Trik grabs him & nails a Triple Play German Suplex on the hard concrete. Trik drags X-Pac out of the backstage area & down the aisleway. Trik tosses X-Pac into the ring as the referee rings the bell. Trik grabs X-Pac & throws him into the ropes. A weak X-Pac manages to duck a chop as he bounces off the ropes. X-Pac returns with a high cross bodyblock. As X-Pac gets to his feet, Trik low blows him. As X-Pac is crouched over, Trik sets him up & nails him with a Trik Turner. Trik then decides to apply the Crappler Crossface, as a very weak X-Pac taps out. Trik gets to his feet & grabs the microphone.)
You see that HitmanMark? You see what happens when you let things distract you? You're distracted HitmanMark. I can tell. And that's exactly what I wanted. Distraction.
You may have beaten me, but the thing is...you don't understand me. You don't understand anything about me. You think you know me, but you don't. And because of this, when it really counts...I will beat you at your own game.
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Post by respectmeordye3 on Mar 13, 2006 15:21:49 GMT -5
Limey is in his dressing room minding his own buisness when there is a knock on the door,with a sigh he wanders over and opens it up only to find no one there--he looks down the corridor both ways.
Empty.
As he mutters about having to putting up with damn practical jokers he grabs the door to close it when something catches his eye. Leaning down he picks an envelope up off the floor and opens it up.
he pulls out the slip of paper inside.
he reads it.
"Come out to the ring--if you dare!"
His curiousity getting the better of him he decides to see just what exactly this is all about and heads for the ring.....
His music and pyro go off as he wanders down the ramp and enters the ring.
he grabs a mic.
"Allright--whoever sent me the letter--I'm out here like you asked--what's up?"
Limey's expecting an surprise attack from one of the other wrestlers, or the manager to come out and book him in some kind of special match for next week--what he isn't expecting is for Mitchell Brell's ugly mug to appear on the Titantron.
"What the hell do you want Brell?" asks Limey slightly annoyed.
"I spent all of last week thinking of a perfect revenge for what you've done to me you jockass!" Brell screams "That little brainwashing you did to trick me into trying to attack you from the top of the staircase was most intelligent I admit--but I have finally found a way to make you pay!"
Brell catches his breath and continues, "I spent all of last week watching you at home, trying to figure out a way to get revenge on you and I finally figured it out!"
The camera pans out to reveal an old 1955 Dodge sitting beside him. "I'm gonna destroy this car of yours--think of me as you watch this classic car of yours get obliterated and realize that when you mess with me I will always win!" Brell screams
"But that's not my---" Limey begins, but he's cut off by Brell "SHUT UP JOCKASS!, I know what your trying to do and it won't work!,I saw you driving it to and from your home!, I saw you working on it whenever you could---so don't even try and convince me that it ain't yours, 'cause I don't buy that load of crap for a second! Just kiss your car goodbye and admit I won!"
Before Limey can even say another word, Brell grabs an open container of paint and splashes it onto the car. He grabs another can of paint and repeats the process yet again. Then he grabs a baseball bat and begins to smash the old classic vehicle.
When he's done the car---if you could still call it that is a mess. Brell turns to the camera "See Limey, I won! No one ever beats me cause---"
Brell is cut off as a hand is placed on his shoulder and he's spun completely around. The first thing he sees is a belly button. Looking up he sees to angry face of a eight foot tall giant man who at this moment is wearing a nice suit--and his badge Identifying him as the local chief of police.
"Like I was trying to tell you before Brell, the car was not mine--I was simply trying to fix it for a friend to whom it belongs---the same friend in fact whom you are currently looking at ."
The giant police chief growls, and grabbing Mitch by his shirt yanks him up so the two are face to face.
"I'm off duty right now--why don't we go talk about what you just did to my car here, okay?"
Brell screams in terror as the Titantron screen goes black and his terrified pleas for help fade away as the crowd laughs like crazy.
Sighing again Limey shakes his head in disbeleif and wanders back to his dressing room.......
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Post by dorf on Mar 13, 2006 15:37:03 GMT -5
*Dorf is in the lockerroom with Terry Taylor*
TT: Terry Taylor, here in the lockerroom with Dorf, trying to get a few thoughts of his unstable mind.
Dorf: Red Rooster, I know what you want out of me and I'll give you the time right now.
As you see, I am being stalked by this 'Hoss Ninja' out there that is very stealthy. I have no beef with him, but why does he have it with me? Obviously this is not about David Adams and nobody I've faced within the past year in EWT.
TT: Well then, Dorf...who could it be then?
Dorf: To be quite honest...I have no idea. A Hoss Ninja can mean almost anybody...it could be 1 person in there 2 small people, or hell three juniors in there.
In retrospects, I believe this was a ploy for the mental hospital to prove that I am not crazy and as you can see I'm as calm as rogaine right now. Sure, over the events of Freek Show made me more cautioned, since what happened to David Adams.
I know the Hoss Ninja saved me, but I did not need him in that match that made me victorius over him.
The ploy with Hoss Ninja is that its probably a security guard or something that he's determined to see if this is my final test to be legally sane again. There's no other determinant. Sadly, he's doing a damn good job of almost freaking me out, but he hasn't changed me much and hopefully, he won't.
TT: Stong, choice words from our former EWT World Heavyweight Champion...standby in the ring for a special announcement....*camera fades to the ring*
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Doomrider
Hank Scorpio
I wanna bang Marla.
Posts: 6,058
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Post by Doomrider on Mar 13, 2006 18:55:06 GMT -5
-=Scene=- The Psychadeli is standing over the rubble of the building. All of them, male or female, is wearing a cheap clip on bowtie. They say their final prayers and wish each other adieu. Dick and Mama P walk to their mini-van with baby Wilson. The Swami and Ole King Kole walk in the opposite direction talking about their new business in sensual massages. That leaves us with Senor Splash. Splash, in his coveralls and bowtie, turns to the camera with a tear in his eye.
-=Senor Splash=- Me pregunto if Toomi will give me a Rey Mysterio push ahora…no…no…
-=Scene=- Senor Splash slowly walks down the street with his hands in his pockets, thinking of all the good times. He looks up to a huge billboard of Senor Sensible giving his usual cheesy smile. Splash falls to his knees, extends his arms, and screams.
-=Senor Splash=- Poooooooor Quuuuuuuuuuuue?!?!?!?!?!?!?!
-=Scene=- It begins to rain as Splash collapses. The camera circles around him. Splash’s hands ball up into fists. He rises back to his knees with a look of determination. Splash hops to his feet, stumbles back a little, belches, and points at the billboard.
-=Senor Splash=- ¡Todavía me no hacen! (I am not done yet!)
-=Scene=- The camera zooms in on Splash furiously drunk eyes. A smoke transitions this scene to another of Splash in Alps training with some monks. They are circled around him. One monk charges at him at a time and he takes them down one by one. He bows to the last one and falls back into a stance. They begin to battle with several elaborate kicks and strikes. Splash grabs him by the arm and slams him to the ground. The monk rises back to his feet and bows to Splash, who returns the bow. We then cut to Splash fighting with a Norseman on a log over a waterfall. They’re battling with large bo-staffs ie: Robin Hood. Splash and the Norseman battle it back and forth until finally Splash lands a strike that knocks him on his ass and off the log. Splash slams his bo onto the log in approval. We cut again to Splash in the woods wearing only a kilt, boots, and his mask. He’s bare knuckle boxing a bear. He clubs the bear several times, head butts it, and climbs on top of it’s chest as it falls. Splash twists his neck until the bear’s head rips completely off. Splash raises it’s head and screams at the top of his lungs. We then cut back to Senor Splash back in the rain in front of the Sensible billboard.
-=Senor Splash=- Oh…yea….I better go train I guessssshhhh…
-=Scene=- Splash stumbles to the left, catches his footing, and begins running off into the rainy night.
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Doomrider
Hank Scorpio
I wanna bang Marla.
Posts: 6,058
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Post by Doomrider on Mar 13, 2006 18:57:45 GMT -5
The Psychadeli May Be Dead. But Own A Piece of It's History!For a limited time only, own the only unseen Psychadeli segment not allowed on television by EWT officials!
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Queen Rosa
Mike the Goon
All hail the queen!
Posts: 30
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Post by Queen Rosa on Mar 13, 2006 19:04:23 GMT -5
Ring Announcer: The following contest is scheduled for one fall. Introducing first, from New York City, the 2006 EWT Harlot Hunt winner, D'Zee!
*D'Zee walks out with a mean look on her face. She gets in one fan's face as if she was going to slap him, but then keeps going on her merry way. She gets a mostly negative reaction from the crowd. Then "It's My Time" plays*
RA: And her opponent, from Miami, Florida, Rosa!
*Rosa gets a big pop from fans. She hi-fives some of them on the way to the ring. D'Zee stares a hole at Rosa. Rosa steps through the ropes and stares back*
The bell rings to start the match. Rosa and D'Zee circle the ring. D'Zee goes for a swing, but Rosa moves out of the way. D'Zee goes for another, but again Rosa dodges it. Then the two lock up. D'Zee gets the upper hand and slams Rosa's head into the mat. She then does a little showing off.
D'Zee: Yeah, that's what I'm talkin' about!
The crowd boos her for that. She turns her attention back to Rosa by body slamming her and hitting an elbow drop. She goes for the cover.
1... 2...
Rosa kicks out. D'Zee gets in the referee's face and tells him to count faster. She turns around and is met with a back elbow attack by Rosa. Rosa picks her up and whips her to the ropes, landing a Capoeira Spinning Kick. D'Zee runs at her and is hit with a flapjack. Rosa then runs to the ropes and hits her with a running head scissors. D'Zee gets to the corner to help herself up. Rosa stays on her with a combination of punches, kicks, and chops. Next she runs at her with a handspring elbow attack followed by a bulldog. She goes for a cover.
1... 2...
D'Zee kicks out. Rosa picks her up and whips her to the ropes. But D'Zee stops on the ropes. Rosa runs at her, but D'Zee back drops her to the outside. A sick smile comes across D'Zee's face as she steps outside. She picks Rosa up and rams her into the steel steps. Next she rams her into the apron a few times. D'Zee rolls Rosa back into the ring and covers her.
1... 2...
Rosa gets a shoulder up. D'Zee picks her up and whips her to the ropes. She hits her with a kick to the stomach, then connects with a axe kick. D'Zee gets Rosa to her feet and takes her down with a shoulderbreaker. Then she hits a kneebreaker and covers her.
1... 2...
Rosa kicks out again. D'Zee is starting to show signs of frustration. She picks up Rosa and puts her in a bearhug, but then quickly turns it into a spinebuster. After hitting a wishbone legsplitter, she goes for the pin again.
1... 2...
Again Rosa kicks out. D'Zee is now frustrated and takes Rosa to the corner. She bangs her head on the turnbuckle continuously and then chokes her. The ref starts counting to five. D'Zee breaks it after four and gets in the ref's face. D'Zee runs at Rosa, but hits the turnbuckle due to Rosa moving out of the way. Rosa takes advantage with a tiger suplex pin.
1... 2...
D'Zee kicks out. She runs at Rosa and is hit with a dropsault. She runs at her again and is met with a spinning heel kick. Rosa picks her up and hits her with an inverted atomic drop and takes her down with a butterfly suplex. She goes for a cover.
1... 2...
D'Zee kicks out. Rosa hits her with a backbreaker and climbs the ropes. She connects with a flying hurricanrana. Then as soon as she's about to finish her off, out comes Chrysta and Ms. White. They catch Rosa's attention. Rosa yells out "Come on!" to Chrysta, telling her to get in the ring. D'Zee comes up from behind with a roll up.
1... 2...
Rosa kicks out, but D'Zee takes her down with a hard clothesline. She takes Rosa back to the corner, banging her head on the turnbuckle numerous times. Again she applies a choke. The ref counts to five again. This time, D'Zee doesn't break the hold and the ref is forced to call for the bell.
RA: Here is your winner, by disqualification, Rosa!
*That makes D'Zee break the hold and get in the ref's face. She punches his lights out and does some trash talking to him. She turns around and Rosa hits her with some Sweet Chin Muzak. Next she lfts her up for the Northern Lights Driver and connects. Rosa looks down at her, shaking her head.
Rosa: You still have a lot to learn.
*Rosa then turns her attention back to Chrysta and urges her to get in the ring and fight her. But Chrysta just stands there, staring coldly. She and Ms. White eventually head to the back, causing many fans to boo. Rosa eventually gets out of the ring and hi-fives some fans on her way backstage*
*Cut to a commercial*
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Curly Long
AC Slater
Midget Wrestling Master
Posts: 234
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Post by Curly Long on Mar 13, 2006 19:39:50 GMT -5
back at ringside and someone has given Micheal Cole the mikeCOLE: Everybody it is now time for the EWT Tag Team Championship match ... introducing first ..... 'KERRACK!!' Lillian Garcia drops the chair, takes back her microphone and kicks Cole out of the ringLILLIAN: ... my foot to your face! take a hike Cole! .. sorry about that people! .. now introducing first from Manchester, England ... they weigh in at around 490 lbs ... they are the British Bulldogs!! The Royal British Music begins to play and out come the Bulldogs in there splendor. Capes over there shoulders, the fans firmly behind them as Matilda walks alongside them to ringsideLILLIAN: ... and there opponents ... they are the EWT Tag Team Champions ... Crowd Boo's loudlyLILLIAN: they weigh at around 540 pounds ... they are Curly Long and Mr. Big !! The sinister version of 'Moving on Up' belts out across the arena as Mr. Big walks out with Curly on top of his broad shoulders .. they raise the Title Belts up so the audience can see and get a huge roar of boo's and insults as they head to the ring. Curly has a smug look on his face as they enter and decide who will be going firstBell RingsCurly decides to go first and walks up to the Dynamite Kid. The Two watch each other as the Ref checks Curly for any weapons. The Ref now happy lets them go at it! ... Dynamite and Curly tie up but due to his small size Curly jumps on the Dynamite Kid's shoulders and hits an early roll up pinning predicament ... 1,2 ... Dynamite kicks out and rolls to Curly's side giving him a jab to the nose. Curly incensed by this rushes the downed Kid but he grabs Curly and using Curly's own momentum send s him out to the ring floor! ... The Ref starts a count as Mr. Big paces in his corner 1 ... 2 ... 3 ... 4 ... 5 .... Curly clambers back in and gets hit with a snap suplex as Dynamite Kid tags in Davey Boy. Davey boy gives Curly a few stomps and then lifts him up fro a falling press slam ... Curly falls like a dropped baby .. cover .. 1,2 ... Curly kicks out but Davey Boy holds on with a headlock and then follows with a headbutt! .. Curly holds his cranium as Davey Boy lifts him up for the running Powerslam! ... but Curly falls down his back and kicks him in the back of the leg. Curly then using some speed nails a running bulldog on the kneeling Davey Boy. Curly makes a tag to Mr. Big .. Mr. Big enters and starts to pummel and bash Davey Boy around the ring like a cat plays with a ball of yarn! ... Left Hooks, Clotheslines, sledgehammer shots reign down on Davey Boy. Dynamite tries to get the crowd on side ... as Davey boy lashes out with a few forearms of his own but Mr. Big shockingly counters one of the punches ... The Crowd boos as Mr. Big locks in a sleeper on Davey BoyDavey Boy is beginning to fade from the huge pillars that Mr. Big calls arms! ... but Dynamite runs in and breaks it up ... This of course distracts the referee allowing Curly to kick Davey Boy Smith squarely in the nuts whilst Mr. Big holds him up! ... Mr. Big then completes the unfair double team with a Rib Breaker .. cover .. 1,2 ... Dynamite attempts to break up the pinfall .. but Mr. Big clearly thinking gets up and clobbers the Kid with a huge Clothesline turning him inside out!! ... Davey Boy is back on his feet but in trouble as Mr. Big nails him with the HFD! ... Mr. Big tags and Curly leaps off the top turnbuckle with a legdrop ... cover 1,2,3. Bell RingsLILLIAN: Your Winners and still EWT Tag Team Champions! ... Curly Long and Mr. Big!! Curly and Mr. Big savors there victory under a torrent of 'VLB' and 'Die Curly, Die!' chants as the Bulldogs head backstageFade out to commercial for the commemorative Paraslice action figure with real chopping action!
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Post by Joel, Mike, Currently...? on Mar 13, 2006 21:58:12 GMT -5
"Rock and Roll is King" by ELO hits, and Ricky Morton and Robert Gibson, The Rock n' Roll Express hit the ring, pumping their fists and trying their best to work the crowd up in a tizzy. The crowd gives a nice nostalgia pop.
It's all about the Pentiums, baby...
Joel and Mike come out, and the crowd allows them their usual pop, as they dance around, and generally act like goofballs. They hit the ring, and before Mike goes down for the windmill, he goes over to shake Ricky Morton's hand, as Joel shakes Gibson's. Mike then returns to the middle of the ring, and hits a windmill, and rises up to throw up the N with Joel. Joel and Gibson go to their respective corners, as Mike and Morton circle eachother. Just as they lock up, the Handsome Boys Modeling School theme hits, and out walk Billy Ubermark and Ultimo Chocula, followed closely by Moniqua and Frou Frou. Chocula has a mic.
When they reach the ring, Chocula lifts the mic to speak.
Choc: *taking in the crowd's boos* As far as I'm concerned, you should be thanking me I saved you from a match between the most useless team in history (gestures toward the Nyrds) and the most washed up team in history (gestures toward Morton and Gibson). I am out here to prevent a tragedy from occuring. I am here to stop the Nyrds from having their frail little bones broken over the wheezing, so called legends that is the Rock n' Roll Express. It's 2006, boys, Rock n' Roll is DEAD! And you two (points at Joel and Mike) with your ridiculously bad hip hop. Was Weird Al even gangsta? Was he ever even in STYLE? I should think not. And I would know. I...we...are all about style. Now I want both your teams to shake hands, walk to the back, and let real wrestlers do their job. And maybe you should pray, that God will allow someone like me or Billy to grace your pathetic presence ever again...
Mike and Joel walk forward to fight, but Ricky Morton stops them. Chocula and Billy gain wide smiles, but Billy's turns to one of shock as Morton spins around and decks Chocula in the face! The crowd gives a huge pop, as the Nyrds and the RnR Express brawl with the HBMS. Morton and Mike tandem whip Chocula to the ropes, and they perform the Express's trademark double dropkick on him, sending him out to the ring. Gibson and Joel double arm drag Billy, who lands near the ropes. Mike whips Joel at Billy, who running diving forearms Billy over the ropes. As Mike hits the ropes, Joel runs back and hits the ropes as well, and they both dive over the top onto the HBMS, and as usual, they brawl. Once again, here comes security to break it up, and for no apparent reason, the match is thrown out.
And now, we go to break...
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