Ragnal
Game Genie
Yanno what they say: All toasters toast El Dandy
Posts: 8,677,836
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Post by Ragnal on Mar 13, 2006 23:25:36 GMT -5
LILLIAN: The following contest is scheduled for one fall! The winner of this match will be crowned the #1 contenders for the EWT Tag Team titles after the Freek Show rematch!
*High Voltage plays as Mike and Joe Ragnal make their way out to the arena, slapping hands with the crowds on the way.*
LILLIAN: Introducing first, from Scranton, PA, weighing in at a combined weight of 479 lbs...Mike and Joe RAGNAL!
*As Mike and Joe make their way into the ring, Lillian hands Mike the mic.*
MIKE: Well, here we are, the Brothers Ragnal in our first match without the tag belts.
*The crowd boos, with chants of VLB thrown in.*
MIKE: Yeah, that's right. Curly and Big have the tag straps now...but trust us. They won't last long, as one way or the other, after this match, NEXT week we'll be having our rematch!
*cheers*
MIKE: now, Joe and I have looked over every possible match stipulation, and we believe we finally have one idea that Curly and Big haven't expected. Although, if Curly worked as a midget clown at a carnival, he might be familiar with the name at least.
*The crowd laughs, along with cheers as some fans already have an idea of the match.*
MIKE: But, just to give Joe some mic time, I'll let him introduce the match.
*Mike hands Joe the mic.*
JOE: Curly, I think the audience can agree we had fun in Disneyland. It didn't turn out fun for us at the end, since we lost our belts, but now, here's where things become more 'FUN'! See, since last time we got confused as to who was the legal man, this time it won't be so hard, since part of this rather 'fun' match includes Texas Tornado Tag rules. It also includes NO rules, no DQ, falls anywhere...and a few rather 'fun' items!
*Cheers*
JOE: That's right. For the first time ever, The Tag Team titles will be defended in the first ever tag team edition of Joe Ragnal's FUN HOUSE! And Curly, Big, we can assure you, you're going to get knocked down harder than a tree in a windstorm.
M&J: And THAT'S the Shocking Truth!
*As Joe hands Ms. Garcia the microphone, "Look At This Face" starts playing over the loudspeakers. The Handsome Boys Modeling School makes their enterance wearing matching purple and gold tights. Billy also has his leather jacket on, while Chocula is sporting another pair of Oakley sunglasses. Moniqua trails closely behind them in an expensive mini-skirt and high-heeled shoes, and all around them, the crowd goes into a frenzy of boos.*
LILLIAN: And their opponents, accompanied by Moniqua and weighing in at a combined weight of 458 lbs. The team of Ultimo Chocula and Billy "The Virgin" Ubermark.... The Handsome Boys Modeling School!
*Ultimo Chocula takes the microphone from Lillian Garcia without asking. He signals for the music to stop and then starts addressing the Ragnals.*
UC: What the hell is all this crap? Were you two jokers SERIOUSLY talking about becoming the Tag-Team Champions, again? You just got done losing the belts to the combination of Mini-Me and a Sasquatch! After that, I'm suprised you two haven't gone and buried your heads in the sand like a couple of ostriches, because that just (bleep)-ing embarassing.
*The crowd boos heavily at Chocula's comments. He hands the microphone off to Billy Ubermark who is suddenly met with the chant of "Screw the Virgin." Billy roosters his head and listens for a second or two with a scowl on his face. He then shakes his head with dismay and begins to speak.*
BU: That's it, folks! Just keep heaping that Virgin Discrimination on. I'm used to it. We're used to it. Its crap like that that's keeping Ultimo Chocula and I from getting our rightly-deserved shots at the tag-team titles, and instead having to go through with a match against these inbred goofballs.
*Billy's comments draw an erruption of boos from the fans. Across the ring, Mike Ragnal makes a move towards Billy, but his brother, Joe holds him back as the Virgin continues on.*
BU: Don't get all riled up, Mikey. You know as well as I do that your clan brings new meaning to the term "a game the whole family can play." Hell, I've seen poles in a firehouse with more branches than your family tree.
*Mike points a threatening finger at Billy who hand the microphone back to Chocula.*
UC: Awe, Mikey! Don't take what Billy's saying about your family the wrong way! We still respect you more than we do the Nyrds!
*Billy and Chocula both look at each other, and then look back at Moniqua. Suddenly, all three of them burst out laughing. Chocula is first to regain his composure enough to talk.*
UC: OK! OK! I lied, we don't respect EITHER of you teams. And Billy's right, your family tree looks more like a dandilion. And tonight, we're going to pour some weed-killer on that sucker when we take you two out of the title picture. Ain't that right, Billy?
BU (now settled down enough to talk): That's right, Chocula. Because, Mike and Joe, just like the Nyrds, you guys are a thing of the past, but me and Chocula.... we represent the future of the E.W.T. Tag-Team Division. And as you can see, the future looks....
BU & UC (in unison): AWFULLY... DAMN.... GOOD!
*Billy tosses the microphone back to Lillian Garcia. Then as she exits the ring, he and Chocula watch her ass as she steps through the ropes. Lillian catches them ogling her, and gives them both a dirty look. Moniqua also steps through the ropes to the outside of the ring.*
*The bell rings as Mike and Billy, the ones with the longest history of the two groups, start the match off as Joe and UC head to their respective corners. Billy offers Mike a handshake with an insincere smile on his face. Mike simply flips Billy the bird to the rousing delight of the fans. Billy puts his hands to his face in mock embarassment for a second or two before making his move towards Mike. Mike and Billy are lock up in the center of the ring, and Billy begins to press Mike down to the ground. Billy pushes him down until Mike is on both knees, then hits a dropkick to Mike’s chest and releases his hands. Billy slaps Mike in the head before he can get up, then picks him up and knees him in the gut. Billy picks him up for a vertical suplex, but Mike slips out behind Billy and hits him with a Russian Leg Sweep. Mike gets up and makes the tag to Joe. Joe stands on the apron and jumps off the ropes, connecting a seated senton drop to Billy. Joe gets off of Billy and runs to the corner, where he jumps off the top turnbuckle with a split-legged moonsault onto Billy. Joe goes to pin.*
1!2!
*Billy kicks out. Joe kicks Billy in the stomach a few times before picking him up. As he lifts Billy by the hair, Joe whips him into his corner, then hits a stinger splash to Billy. Joe kicks him back into the corner, then tags Mike in. Mike grabs Billy for a vertical suplex, and Joe stands on the turnbuckle and lands a missile dropkick to Billy, then Mike hits a vertical suplex to Billy as Joe gets over to his corner. Mike runs to the ropes hoping for a Lionsault, but Billy rolls out of the way and Mike lands on his feet. Billy’s already up on his feet and Billy hits an Enziguri to the back of Mike’s head. Billy goes to pin.*
1!2!
*Mike kicks out. Billy goes to tag Chocula in, and Chocula picks Mike up and whips him into his corner, where Joe blind tags him. Joe gets in and knocks Chocula with a clothesline. Joe picks Chocula up and whips him into a corner, and rushes at him. Chocula elbows Joe in the gut, then hits him with a running bulldog. Chocula goes to pin.*
1!2!
*Joe kicks out. Chocula picks up Joe and whips him into a corner. Chocula charges at Joe and nails a clothesline to the throat. Joe stumbles out of the corner, and Chocula slaps him across the chest back into the corner. As he cross chops Joe, the fans give a loud “WOOO!” for each one. As Chocula goes for one more chop, Joe is able to duck under it and go behind UC and hits him with a Full Nielson Suplex. Joe gets up quickly and runs to the ropes, and hits a legdrop to the throat. Joe goes to pin.*
1!2!
*Chocula kicks out. Joe tags Mike in, and Mike climbs the turnbuckle looking for an elbow drop. Chocula rolls out of the way, and Mike hits the canvas. Mike grabs at his arm in pain, and Chocula takes advantage of this with a dropkick to the back. Mike falls backwards, and Chocula hits a hard Shooting Star Press to Mike. Chocula goes to pin.*
1!2!
*Joe grabs UC off of Mike and starts to beat him up. Joe whips him into the ropes, then kicks him in the gut as he comes back. Joe nails a snapmare to UC, then hits a spinning leg drop to him. Billy gets out of his corner and hits a double axe smash to the back of Joe. Billy tosses Joe out of the ring. Billy gets onto the apron, waiting for Joe to get up. Billy runs on the apron, jumps off it, and hits a hurracanrana to Joe. Both competitors are now laying outside of the ring. In the ring, Mike and UC are just getting up, and Mike and UC begin to trade punches back and forth, until finally, UC gets ready to hit Mike hard, but Mike ducks under, then hoists UC onto his shoulders. Mike spins him over his head, ready for a powerbomb. However, Moniqua is able to grab Mike’s leg and trip him backwards, causing UC to land on Mike. As the ref goes to count, UC grabs the ropes at an angle the ref can’t see at.*
1!2!3!
*The bell rings as Ultimo Chocula jumps off of Mike and through the ropes. Mike quickly rolls over to grab Chocula. He reaches through the ropes, but Chocula is out of reach. Chocula heads over to the entry ramp where he's met by Billy Ubermark (who is holding the back of his head) and Moniqua. The fans roar with outrage at the screw-job as Lillian Garcia comes over the P.A. system with the official decision.*
LILLIAN: Here are your winners of this match, and new #1 contenders for the E.W.T. Tag-Team Titles.... The Handsome Boys Modeling School!
*"Look At This Face" blasts over the speakers as Billy, Chocula, and Moniqua start heading up the entry ramp. Billy holds his arms up in victory for the entire crowd to see, and beside him, Chocula makes a shrugging hand gesture back at the Ragnals and mouths the words "Too damn bad!" at them. Back in the ring, the camera gets a shot at Mike Ragnal slamming his fist on the canvas in the ring in anger. Kneeled down behind him is his brother Joe, who stares menacingly at the HBMS as they head up the ramp. With that image still on the screen, the camera fades to black and we go to commercial.*
COMMERCIAL
(An angsty teen-ager appears on the screen, standing in front of a tobacco company's main office building. we know he's angsty because he's dressed in a stupid t-shirt and ripped-up blue jeans comes on the screen. He's scowling so he can look EXTRA angsty. Angsty, ominous music plays in the background. Hell, the whole commercial reeks of angst as the teen-ager starts talking in an angsty, know-it-all tone of voice.)
*ANGSTY TEEN-AGER*: Did you know that a major tobacco company once told its customers that if you smoked a cigarette after having sex, it would reduce your chances of contracting AIDS, Chicken Pox, Alzheimer's, and other sexually transmitted diseases? Well, its true because those of us a Truth.com say it is. And another thing....
(Suddenly, from of out of nowhere, a giant gorilla storms into the alley. It grabs the teen-ager before he can move and starts pounding on him with closed fists. The teen-ager falls to the ground, and the gorilla starts stomping on his chest to the point where we can hear the littleS***'s ribs start cracking. The screen then goes to a test patter with the words "TECHNICAL PROBLEMS! PLEASE STAND BY!" typed over it.)
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Post by #Classic Hi-Definition X on Mar 13, 2006 23:37:09 GMT -5
*We come back from commercial and are ringside for the next match*
Ring Announcer: The following contest is scheduled for one fall and is for the EWT Tri-State Championship.
*"Gas Power" plays*
RA: Introducing the challenger, from Buffalo, New York, weighing in at 323 lbs., "Big Daddy" Gasoline!
*Gasoline walks out to a huge pop, shaking hands with fans. He gets into the ring and raises a fist into the air*
RA: And his opponent, from the great state of Texas, weighing in at 305 lbs., the EWT Tri-State Champion, The Outlaw Chris James!
*The Four Horsemen theme starts up, and instead of Outlaw on his horse a black limo comes down the ramp, and stops. Out steps Outlaw Chris James who is now sporting a new short hair cut, and is clean shaven. Outlaw reaches his hand into the limo, and out comes the lovely Jillian Hall. As Outlaw makes his way to the ring he looks at the fans in disgust. Outlaw climbs the ring steps, and holds the ropes open for Jillian. Jillian walks over, and grabs the mic from the anouncer, and hands it to Outlaw*
OL: Well look at here Bret you got a girl to help cheat your way to a victory, but I got a woman that will kick the hell out of your little s***! If she even tries to get involved! So Bret get your ass out here!!!
*And with that, "Sexy Guy" starts up*
Oh oh Bret...
RA: Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome "Sensational" Cherry and the special guest referee, the Heartbreak Hitman Bret Michaels!
*Out walks HBH in a referee shirt and short shorts and accompanied by Cherry. HBH gets into the ring and poses. Gasoline is in the corner rolling his eyes*
The bell rings to start the match. Outlaw and Gas circle the ring. The lock up. Outlaw breaks it with a knee to the stomach. Then he connects with a forearm. He attempts a whip to the ropes, but Gas reverses it. Outlaw attacks with a shoulder block, but Gas doesn't budge. Outlaw runs to the ropes and hits a flying shoulder block, which sends Gas backwards a bit. Outlaw runs to the ropes again and hits another flying shoulder block, this time knocking Gas down. Outlaw goes for a cover.
1....
Gas kicks out. Outlaw shoots a mean stare at HBH for the slow count. He focuses back on Gas by hitting a swinging neckbreaker. He runs to the ropes for a leg drop, but misses. Gas capitalizes with a clothesline. Next he performs a vertical suplex. After that he hits a backdrop and covers Outlaw.
1..2...
Outlaw kicks out. Gas has a "WTF?" look on his face over the extremely fast count by HBH. He turns his attention back to Outlaw by taking him to the corner and giving him a series of knees and elbow. Then he chokes him with his foot. Gas whips him to the opposite corner. He runs at him, but Outlaw counters with an elbow. He runs at Gas, hitting a flying lariat. He picks up Gas and performs a spinning powerbomb for a pin.
1....
2....
Gas kicks out. Outlaw gets in HBH's face about the slow count, telling him to count faster or else. HBH doesn't look at all fazed by the threat. Outlaw picks up Gas and hits a T-Bone Suplex. He runs to the ropes and connects with a leg drop. He picks up Gas again and hits a brainbuster. Next he climbs the ropes. He jumps off, but Gas's boot hits him, knocking him down. HBH starts the 10 count.
1 2 3 4 5 6 7
Both men are now back up. They exchange punches, but Gas eventually gets the upper hand. He whips Outlaw to the ropes and hits a big boot. Outlaw is still standing however, so Gas runs to the ropes and takes him down with a spear. Outlaw runs at him and is met with a sidewalk slam. Gas picks him and hits the Snake Eyes. He follows that up with a powerslam. He goes for another cover.
1..2...
Outlaw kicks out after another fast count. Once again Gas is confused about this. He shrugs his shoulders and picks up Outlaw, who pokes him in the eyes. Outlaw takes advantage with a pumphandle slam. He pins Gas.
1...
2...
Gas kicks out. Outlaw is now very angry. He gets in HBH's face again, complaining about the slow count. He shoves HBH. HBH shoves him back, telling him that he can't put his hands on a referee. Outlaw turns away, but then knocks down HBH with a hard right. He turns around and walks into a spinebuster. He signals for the end of the match as the crowd cheers. He sets Outlaw up for the Jackknife Powerbomb, but Outlaw reverses it into a back body drop. He then clotheslines Gas over the top rope. When he turns around, he's met with some Sweet Chin Muzak. HBH then calls for the bell. He tells the ring announcer the outcome of the match. The ring announcer has a confused look on his face.
HBH: Just do it!
The ring announcer then announces the outcome.
RA: Here is your winner by disqualification, the EWT Tri-State Champion, The Outlaw Chris James!
*HBH kneels down and pummels the fallen Outlaw. Jillian gets on the apron trying to help Outlaw but she is knocked off by Cherry. HBH slides out of the ring and grabs the Tri-State title. He gets back in the ring, waiting for Outlaw to get up. Outlaw gets up, and HBH nails him with the title, busting him open. HBH grabs a mic*
HBH: Congratulations, Outlaw. Your pathetic ass just picked up a victory. Enjoy it while you can, because when I face you for the Tri-State title, this *picks up title and raises it in the air* will be the last image people will see of the match. I will be walking out the NEW Tri-State Champion, and you will be feeling some more Sweet Chin Muzak!
*HBH and Cherry celebrate in the ring much the crowd's dismay. They do some posing and eventually head backstage*
*Cut to next segment*
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Deamon Cohln
Don Corleone
AND THAT'S THE GODDAMN TRUTH!
Posts: 1,962
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Post by Deamon Cohln on Mar 14, 2006 0:51:58 GMT -5
www.deamon.crystaltwilight.net/AudioAEWT.mp3*Deamon is shown sitting in the locker room alone. He is sitting in a chair backwards and looking at the ground. He lifts his head and begins to speak.* Deamon: Bolt Bacana, I took this time away from the rest of my family and my girlfriend to talk straight to you. Why? Because I want you to hear this clearly, without interruption. This message is just too important to have clouded by my brothers. Who by the way, are on their way to Tag Team gold after beating the Connection, but not at the moment. But right now I want to talk about a different piece of gold Bolt. That gold you so proudly hold around your waist. The OX Championship. Your first title reign, you must be so proud of yourself. Watch out though, pride reduces the ability to focus on your next match. You never know what will happen when pride takes over you. Someone may just take that title away from you before I get a chance to. Which I will eventually, you can count on that. Deamon: I don’t know if this is your first run with gold Bolt, but when I beat you, I sure as hell won’t be mine. I have held countless titles in other feds and even ran my own for awhile. What have you done Bolt? Beat Spaz when he was already weakened from a previous match. Very heroic Bolt, Very Heroic. At least I took on EN Bunk….., Chad Mich…, EN Micheals….oh whatever. alone, and beat him without any interruption. Then you had to play the hero and come out. Do you know where this will lead you Bolt? To your own annialation. Have a good reign Bolt, because it won’t last much longer, and that’s the GODDAMN TRUTH! *The camera fades out on Deamon as he stands up from the chair letting his hair drop onto his shoulders.*
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Post by respectmeordye3 on Mar 14, 2006 12:49:53 GMT -5
Limey is just coming out of the Men's room when he's suddenly tackled to the floor from behind by Mitchell Brell! Before he can get to his feet Brell, grabs a nearby mop and cracks it across Limey's back. "Allright--I've had enough of this!" Limey shouts and with that he jumps to his feet and chases Brell(who has allready been beaten up earlier tonight) down the hall and out into the arena, where a match has just ended.
Brell sqeals in fright and begins to climb up the side of the Titantron. Limey gives chase and soon the two are seventy-five feet high up--and still climbing.
Bell tries to knock Limey off the Titantron by poking him in the face with the mop but instead he loses his grip on it and it does a freefall down onto the steel ramp.
Brell screams.
"Leave me alone Jockass-leave me-"
Limey grabs Brell's ankle and gives the documentrist a wicked smile and then gives a hard yank.
it works, Brell loses his hold on the titantron and falls through the air with a terrified scream of terror straight down into the pit beside the ramp--crashing through the numberous tables and electronic equipment set up on them as he lands, causing the crowd to shout "HOLY CRAP!" over and over.
As Limey climbs down, a medical staff tends to Brell--and he's quickly loaded onto a stretcher and into and hauled off to the hospital...............
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Post by tacotim on Mar 14, 2006 15:35:59 GMT -5
Generic Ring Announcer: The following contest is set for a 30 minute time limit. Introducing first-
*The lights dim, as we’re used to seeing, signaling the arrival of “Creepshow” Cletus Quinn. As usual, he comes out to boos from the audience. He doesn’t seem phased, though. He steps into the ring and the lights come up. Cletus stands right by the ropes, eyes transfixed on the entryway, as he waits for his opponent.
“Crusher Destroyer” hits, and “Wrestling’s New Messiah” makes his way out to the ring. He looks just as pumped for this match as his opponent. Deron slides into the ring and quickly gets to his feet, as he and Cletus rapidly exchange forearms! The match is underway, as Quinn and Miller trade attacks, neither man backing down, neither man flinching. For about a minute and a half this goes on, uninterrupted, and the audience gets to their feet clapping and cheering against their better judgment at the intensity these individuals possess. The exchange leads both men tumbling outside the ring, where they trade chops, before Quinn whips Miller into the safety barricade. Quinn charges in after him, only to back-body-dropped over the barrier, and into the crowd. Cletus kips up on the concrete floor, springboards onto the barrier, and dropkicks Deron in the back, sending him tumbling. Quinn pulls Deron up and rolls him into the ring, but Deron gets up and charges towards the opposite ropes. He hits a baseball slide on Quinn, sending Creepshow back first into the barricade. This time Deron pulls Quinn up and tosses him into the ring. Cletus gets to his feet, but only just in time for Miller to hit a Belly to Back Suplex! He rolls into a pin.
1… 2… Kickout! Creepshow starts to get to his feet, only for Deron to pick him up and set him on the top turnbuckle. Miller chops Quinn’s chest a few times before setting him up for the Muscle Buster. Miller runs out from the corner, only for Cletus to slide out of his grip and onto his feet behind Deron. Cletus runs the ropes and comes back to hit Suspiria! Deron Miller lands head first on the mat and ultimately winds up rolling out of the ring. Cletus runs the ropes and attempts a suicide Plancha, but Miller catches him, hoists him up on his shoulders, and delivers a DVD on the outside! Both men are down on the outside, as the ref starts to administer a countout.
1… 2… 3… Both men start to get up. 4… 5… 6… Both men are up to their feet. 7… Cletus chops Deron. 8… Deron chops Cletus. 9… Both men barely get into the ring, breaking the count. They get to their feet and trade punches. Deron gets the upper hand, landing a few punches unanswered. Miller goes for a kick, Creepshow grabs the foot. Deron attempts his enziguiri, but Cletus ducks it. When Miller gets to his feet, he’s grabbed from behind in the Million Dollar Dream. From this position, Quinn hits a lungblower, turning the move into the Crystal Lake Nightmare! Miller arches himself as best he can, putting Cletus’s shoulders on the mat.
1… 2… Cletus breaks the hold just in time to prevent the pinfall. Both men get to their feet. Cletus runs up the turnbuckles, going for a moonsault on the standing Deron Miller. Miller catches him, however, and delivers the first half of the Crusher Destroyer, a Tombstone Piledriver! Deron gets back to his feet, looking to finish the move off. He hoists Cletus Quinn onto his shoulders for the DVD. Cletus slips off Deron’s shoulders. Deron turns around to receive a kick in the stomach. Cletus picks up Deron and delivers the FULCI DRIVER! Both men are laid out in the ring. Suddenly, the bell rings, signaling the end of the match. The ref confers with the ring announcer.
Generic Ring Announcer: Ladies and gentlemen, this match has ended in a TIME LIMIT DRAW!
*Both men start to stir, as the audience starts chanting.
Crowd: FIVE MORE MINUTES! *Clap clap clapclapclap* FIVE MORE MINUTES! *Clap clap clapclapclap* FIVE MORE MINUTES! *Clap clap clapclapclap* FIVE MORE MINUTES! *Clap clap clapclapclap*
*Cletus and Deron stand up and look around at the audience, who show their respect for both men. Then, both men look at each other. They walk towards one another, and say stuff that is inaudible. Cletus asks for a microphone.
Cletus: You people booed both of us when we came out here, and now you’re cheering us?!
*The crowd applauds both men again.
Cletus: When I came to the EWT, it wasn’t to make friends with you people. I came here to kick ass and make money. If you want me and Deron to fight again, you’ll PAY to see it next time!
*Cletus throws down the microphone and rolls out of the ring. Deron joins him in heading backstage, as the audience goes back to booing both men. Cut to commercial.
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Lily-Rose
Mike the Goon
Rockin' All Night.
Posts: 42
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Post by Lily-Rose on Mar 14, 2006 20:30:10 GMT -5
*Todd Grisham is backstage with Tanya Flaire.*
TODD: Tanya, word has it Luna Vachon has not yet appeared in time for your match. Do you have any idea why this may have happened?
TANYA: I don't know, Todd, quite honestly. But I'm not focused on Luna. I'm more focused right now with what's been going on with the GND Division. Do you realize that Chrysta and Holly have made a massacre out of the division with this new 'Frozen Code'? Do they honestly have any idea what they're doing? They could eventually hurt us with these special 'rules', Todd! And someone needs to do something about it.
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Maelstrom
AC Slater
The Tide Will Turn!
Posts: 236
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Post by Maelstrom on Mar 15, 2006 7:39:01 GMT -5
We cut into a dark hallway of a hospital .. with only the monotonous pounding of the rain on the window penetrating the gloom. A glow emanates from a room to the left.
The camera turns into the room.
It is a patients room, some machinery beeps in the silence ... a few lights flicker and we see that a drip is attached to the patient. On the other side there is a TV which is on .. it is playing the latest episode of EWT ... a promo for Gen Tech is playing currently. The mass of a man can be seen breathing steadily as the bed sheet rises and falls.
The Camera pans across to the front of the Hospital bed
In the murky light we can see that the medical board .. it reads - Maelstrom: Condition = Critical - Injuries Severe - No movement in legs - Diagnosis - Paralysis
The camera switches to the screen on TV
Its the Flex Magnificent departure segment .. as Flex speaks a muttering can be heard from behind the camera ... As the feature keeps going the groans get louder ....
The camera turns to the bed
There is no movement, a crack of lighting and thunder can be heard and Maelstrom sits bolt upright!! No movement apart from this can be seen except for the blank staring eyes watching the screen in the glowing darkness ... a struggle is going on within, the Maelstrom trying to take shape but his legs will not budge. Sweat drips down the mans chest until after straining with his might his big toe twitches .... a nasty smile forms across his face ... as he slumps back down on the bed
(fade out)
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Oak: Certified Jade Hater
Bill S. Preston, Esq.
Edgier than Wayne Brady, Harder than Chinese Arithmetic, and Higher than the ratings for Blade: The Series
TOP ROPE CATCH A VIBE YEAH I SWERVE WHEN I DRIVE
Posts: 15,390
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Post by Oak: Certified Jade Hater on Mar 15, 2006 12:56:24 GMT -5
Cut to Bolt Bacana with the OX Title on his shoulder.
"Deamon Cohln. You accuse me of taking on Spaz when he wasn't 100%? You say I took advantage when Spaz when he was injured? I have never taken advantage of another wrestler. When I fight, I do it with honor and respect. I do what I can to make sure the job gets done inside the ring, and I think it's safe to say that I have done just that.
But Deamon, you seem to think otherwise. You claim that I take advantage, that I have to cheat. Correct me if I'm wrong, but didn't you have to have your brothers come out at Freek Show and attack Chad? That doesn't seem like the image of a "fighting" champion. It seems like the image of a would-be champ, who has to have his bigger brothers take care of his dirty work for him. Like a scalded dog, you run away from a real fight and only challenge those who you know are easy to beat.
So Deamon, you can run your mouth all you want, but you have to earn a shot against me. It may seem a bit cocky, but all you've done really is beat Chad. Beating one guy doesn't automatically shoot you up to number-one contendership. Trust me, I know. And you think I've been a cheater, not fighting fairly, then if you can prove yourself, I have a fun little stipulation in mind for our match. Be warned Deamon, in the match, you will get hit...WITH A BOLT......FROM.........THE..........BLUEEEEEEEEEEEEE-ah!
The camera fades out a we go to a commercial for "Gorilla's in the Midst", ranked 189 out of 200 on Netflix!
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Post by The Bad Man on Mar 15, 2006 15:39:13 GMT -5
backstage and we see D'Zee training hard in the EWT Lockerroom ... Sum Guy with a face Mask approachesSUM: Hi I'm Sum Guy and normally I don't wear protection! D'Zee stops looks at Sum GuyD'ZEE: Didn't I bust your balls last week Interview man? SUM : You did but i'm a glutton for punishment .. plus it is my duty to get the scoop on the latest news stories ... D'ZEE: Really? ..well I have a new finisher ... SUM GUY: You do? great what is it? D'Zee grabs Sum Guy and slams him face down on the mat .. she locks her legs around his neck and then twists back!! .. Sum taps immeadiatly, his neck almost breaking .. D'Zee releases him and gets up D'ZEE: Now take a hint you low life and keep away from me!! .. otherwise you will feel the Ghetto Neck Snap!! www.zippyvideos.com/1293721444301916/legdrop_into_submission/camera fades out
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Curly Long
AC Slater
Midget Wrestling Master
Posts: 234
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Post by Curly Long on Mar 15, 2006 16:16:27 GMT -5
A Video plays to promote the return of the Colossal coliseum
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Curly Long
AC Slater
Midget Wrestling Master
Posts: 234
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Post by Curly Long on Mar 15, 2006 16:16:51 GMT -5
*We return to ringside and find most of the backstage staff heaving under the strain as they manoeuvre the last of the four marble pillars into each corner. In the centre two stone benches have been placed alongside a table laden with 4 microphones. As the technicians get to work a video begins to play on the Toomi-tron, some sweeping woodwind music begins to play*
VIDEO VOICE-OVER: Remember when interviews took place backstage? … When anyone could do an interview?
*A quick slide show of Interview people such as Sum Guy, Mean Gene Okerlund, Hoss Matthews, Terri and Armbar is shown*
VIDEO VOICE-OVER: Well Curly changed that!
*A hard edge rocky theme replaces the woodwind music … Images of Sum Guy sitting in a corner visibly upset can be seen with Curly standing over him a big thumbs up*
VIDEO VOICE-OVER: He took a great idea ..
*The Heartbreak Hotel is shown in action*
VIDEO VOICE-OVER: and made it bigger and better … and now after a few months absence … Curly’s Colossal Coliseum Returns!!
* A highlight package of the previous Coliseum’s begins to play .. Most seem to feature either Curly or Flex Magnificent! … The crowd clearly not pleased that only the worlds greatest monster and the worlds sickest midget get any airtime show there displeasure with an even louder chorus of boo’s .. The video ends and we return to the ring …*
*Back in the ring stand two drop dead gorgeous brunette girls in togas. One holds a platter of fruit, the other an amber-coloured glass jug filled with wine. As the audience takes this in ‘Moving on Up!’ rings out from the speakers and Mr. Big walks out on his own, he heads to the ring under a rain of boo’s from the crowd one half of the Tag belts over his shoulder. He enters the ring and is given a glass of wine from one of the Toga girls, he also picks up a mike.*
MR. BIG: Ladies and Gentlemen … It is with great honour I present the host of this show … the show being The Colossal Coliseum .. he is one half of the EWT Tag Team Champions … and a true man for the ladies … he is the one, the only … Curly Long!!
*Some ancient roman based music hits as some pyro rises from the stage in an arc. The crowd’s low rumbling boo’s turn into full out venom as Curly Long comes out atop a throne that is carried to the ring by four men. Mr. Big watches with a smile as he drinks his wine. Curly Long grins as they go under the sparks of the pyro, his title belt held high in one hand, a diamond studded cane in the other! … They reach the ring and Curly hops onto the apron as the crowd starts to chant ‘VLB!’ He flips off some of the nearby crowd and enters the ring. Mr. Big leans against one of the pillars. The toga girls give Curly a glass of wine and then hand feed him some grapes. After this Curly grabs a microphone … the crowd still hurling abuse at them*
CURLY: Welcome to Curly is EWT!! …. What a show I have for you ungrateful fans tonight! …You know Big its great to come back to a real highlight of my EWT career ... Curly Long’s Colossal Coliseum! … and yes baby! its still what the title says!
*Curly winks at a blonde haired girl in the audience. She freaks out and tries to hide behind a rather porky looking chap*
CURLY: Hey fat man! get out of the way … some of us have a chance of scoring!
*The Crowd chants ‘VLB’ again, while the fat man yells at Curly!*
CURLY: Well of course for you chubster that probably is scoring! ... heh heh
*The Crowd continues to ‘Boo’ Curly*
CURLY: Anyway enough of the idle chit-chat … A superstar such as my self should never have to associate with the likes of these fans … especially an EWT Tag Team Champion the likes of which you ugly,-petrol-drinking peasants such as yourselves have only read about … if you can even read! …
*The crowd begins to chant ‘Die, Curly Die!’*
CURLY: the only Dying I intend on doing is being pure Dy-namite in bed and in the ring!
*The crowd boo’s again*
CURLY: Yeah well you lot can stick it for all I care as this show is going to go on! … My guests tonight are the new Number one contenders for the EWT Tag Team titles and consider themselves above everyone in style, skill and grace. Of course we all know that they can never be as perfect as me … but you got to give these kids the props they need … They need no introduction, but I’m giving them one anyway. They are the Handsome Boy Modelling School … accompanied by there lovely manager Moniqua …. Ultimo Chocula and Billy ‘The Virgin’ Ubermark …
*"Look At This Face" comes on and out from the curtain walk Billy and Ultimo decked in top of the line tuxedos for the special occasion. They are led to the ring by a particularly made up Moniqua (w/Fru Fru). As they enter the ring they accept some wine from the Toga Girls first. Then all three get go right into there modelling pose, Ultimo looking at his watch, Bill does the Simon Diamond-esque thinking pose, while Moniqua smugly smiles and admires her handsome boys. Wouldn't you? … There music dies off and Curly would be usually starting the interview right now, except he's trying to get a peek up Moniqua's skirt.*
MONIQUA: "Ahem!"
*Fru-Fru snarls and yaps at Curly*
CURLY: "Whuzzat? Oh! Right! How embarrassing! I'm sorry about that! I feel terrible about that! What ever became of me? (Turns to Big) You were right. I owe you five bucks."
BILLY: "Say guys, I don't believe we've had the chance to congratulate you on winning the Tag Team belts at Freek Show. Beating a team like the Ragnals is no mean feat."
UC: "Very true. Those are some niiiiiiiiiiiiice belts."
CURLY: "Ha! Thanks you guys! You see, Big? Respect! That's what it's all about! Respect of one's peers!"
BILLY: "Oh, and we do respect you guys. Why, you're the champs for a reason. You're the top guys in the EWT. That's really something considering how stacked the tag team division is around here."
UC: "That's a true fact. Man, those are some niiiiiiiiiiiice belts."
MONIQUA: "Si, they are quite striking. (she takes out a camera from her coat) Signore Long, would you mind if I got a few snap shots of my handsome boys with the tag team titles? They would look ever so charming with the belts."
CURLY: "I dunno if that's such a hot idea ......what is a hot idea is me in a Jacuzi with Mina, some sunflower oil and … "
*Mr. Big takes the mike away from Curly before he can continue telling the world about his sordid fantasy*
Mr. BIG: He’s trying to say that it’s not happening …
*Fru-Fru begins to bark at Mr. Big … he ignores the dog and gives another mike to Curly*
MONIQUA: "Please. It would me so much to me."
*Moniqua walks up to Curly and bends over so that her cleavage is only a few inches from his face. Curly immediately forks his belt over.*
CURLY: "Here ya go! Big, give 'em your belt."
Mr. BIG: "I'm no so sure about this. I don't think these fools can be trusted."
CURLY: "Would a dame with a rack like this ever lie? C'mon! It's fine! What could possibly go wrong?"
*Big grudgingly gives his belt over to Billy and UC takes the belt from Curly. They wrap the belts around their waists and do a series of poses while Moniqua snaps away with her camera. Suddenly Moniqua stops and all three look at one another and smile. Then in perfect unison they wave to the crowd and say....*
HBMS: "Goodnight everybody!"
*....and begin to walk out of the ring. Big lunges into action and grabs both UC and Billy by the arm and keeps them from leaving the ring. Curly runs up and rips the belts out of their hands and starts to get uppity as Fru-Fru continues to bark at Mr. Big*
CURLY: "Hey! What's the big idea? I knew I shouldn't have trusted you guys!"
BILLY: "Like you two will be holding the belts much longer anyway. Do you really think that you can beat us?"
UC: "We were just saving you two pears the trouble of getting beat into broken heaps of *BEEP*! and bones! Look at us! We were made to hold those belts! We make the belts look GOOD!"
BILLY: "Very, very good. Now look at you two! A shrimp and a muscle head! Neither of you can even fit the belts around your waists! It's a travesty! Don't you think it's high time someone with some class held the belts?"
CURLY: "Of all the......look you punks! You may have gotten past the Ragnals but there's no way you're getting past us! I mean your talking to a Midget King and the Biggest man in EWT … Whilst you two are mere novelty fashion models of the week! … in fact are they even real tuxedos? … look more like cheap knockoffs to me! ... face it you three are fake! …We're the champs and there's no way you'll ever take the belts off of us! Never!"
*The Crowd starts up a duelling ‘Curly Sucks’ & ‘no HBMS do!' Chant*
UC: (turns to Billy) "Fertheluvva.....look at this half pint! He thinks they really stand a chance against us! I haven't heard of anything so idiotic since the Ham album!"
BILLY: "No doubt! Look, Curly! We're the rightful heirs to those belts!
CURLY: Hold it there Billy the Kid! … Billy the Kid I like that naïve, innocent and dumb …
*Billy is visibly annoyed by Curly’s continued interruption and insults*
CURLY: … may I remind you I beat you in the ring not long ago one, two, three!
BILLY: You cheated to get that win small-fry!
*The crowd starts chanting ‘Curly screwed Billy!’ … both men take exception to the chant and challenge the crowd … after it subsides a bit Billy begins to speak again*
BILLY:Do you think anybody else in this fed can beat us and take our spot? Hardly! The Ragnals are last weeks news! The Nyrds? Ha!
UC: "Ugh! Don't get me started on those bed wetters."
BILLY: "So if not us, then who? Who would make a better set of tag champs than us?"
*On that leading Question from the speakers comes the familiar music of the Nyrds! … ‘It's all about the Pentiums, baby' by Weird Al plays as the Nyrds full of energy bounce out onto the stage and head to the ring … a huge cheer comes from the audience as the Nyrds slide into the ring … Fru-Fru starts to yap again visibly annoying Mr. Big …The HBMS move to the far side whilst Curly and Mr. Big hold it all together in the middle. Joel takes the mic … Ultimo and Billy feign being worried. As Mr. Big leans on the ropes while Curly gets hand fed some more grapes by one of the stunning Brunettes*
JOEL: Hey Mike we interrupted the Colossal Coliseum ...
MIKE: Good thing too otherwise the audience would have been forced to watch both stunted growth and stunted brains! …
*The crowd cheers and chants ‘Nyrds’*
CURLY: Listen up you two…
MIKE: Listen Up? … why are you below the sound barrier?
JOEL: Nice!
*Ultimo and Billy push Curly to one side ... Billy takes a deep gulp of air*
Billy: "Joel, I really like your cologne. It smells really good. What is it? Toilet Duck?"
UC: "Aw snap!"
*Mike and Joel angry about this take astep forward but only the immense presence of Mr. Big stops a full out brawl
JOEL: Guys ... you did ask an important question …
MIKE: They certainly did Joel
JOEL: You asked who would make better Tag Team champs than you? .. well we are that answer ... We beat you before in a certain ‘Chamber of Horrors match’! ..
*Crowd Cheers*
JOEL: Say they were in that chamber of horrors, weren’t they Mike?
MIKE: Yeah ... they were the Ghouls’n’Ghosts!
*The Two Nyrds High Five as Ultimo and Billy look visibly annoyed at the nyrds joke … meanwhile Curly stands on the table to get some attention and try and lok down the two Brunettes togas*
CURLY: .. and I thought these two clowns were bad (pointing at Billy and Ultimo) … you muppets couldn’t handle myself and Big, what you going to do? … download the latest cheat codes and deplete all our energy? … cause if you do, it could take a long time to load ... because Curly has energy for everyone all night long! .. ohh yeah! .. isn’t that right Moniqua?
Curly rubs his shiny bald head and grins, his gap teeth showing. Moniqua looks away in disgust
CURLY: Nope I don’t think that the current best team in the EWT … that would be Myself and Mr. Big need to defend the titles against a couple of burger bar assistants such as yourselves …
MIKE: You just …
*The P.T.A theme starts up interrupting Mike and Canceler and Principal Pain head down to the ring ... to about an equal heel reaction to the HBMS. Pain and Canceler quickly enter the ring... looking at Ultimo and Billy then at the Nyrds and finally on Curly and Mr. Big*
PAIN: Now wait just a moment. You say you're the best tag team in the EWT... I beg to differ
*The crowd boos … A ‘Gen Tech’ chant begins*
PAIN: It seems that you have forgotten who DESTROYED the EWT Champion... and his little friend Spaz at Freek Show. And if we can do that to someone of their calibur... well, imagine what we could do to you... or any one of the others tag teams of the EWT!
*The crowd boos some more ... with intermittent chants of ‘P.T.A sucks!’*
PAIN: And furthermore...
CURLY: Hold on what is this? a teachers convention! … I think that ..
*Canceler grabs the fruit platter from one of the girls and throws them over Curly … Mr. Big steps up as the two monsters glare menacingly at each othe fists clenched … the rest of the wrestlers give the two a wide berth … Curly tells Mr. Big to back off while spitting out fruit. Clearly Curly is not wanting his show ruined with a massive fight ... well not one he didn't start at least*
PAIN: As I was saying, the P.T.A. hasn't has a tag team title shot in months! I think it's high time that we get one. .. Handsome Boy Modelling School though I certainly respect your skills... unlike most other tag teams, I have to say that you both look like morons! If that's fashion ... I'd sooner go NUDE then wear those... horrid excuses for clothing!!!
*The crowd cheers slightly... but it's still mostly boos .. a ‘Nyrd’ chant still remains. The HBMS are quick to respond*.
BILLY: "Hold on. I thought you were supposed to be intelligent. Coming up to us like this is a pretty dumb move on your part, smart guy."
UC (The Canceler is right up in his grill, staring a hole into him): "Psst! Hey! Prince O Pal! You mind calling off your gorilla? He's breathing all over me and his sardine breath is wrinkling my tux!"
Curly walks under Ultimo’s legs .. while Fru-Fru continues to yap at Mr. Big
CURLY: Ok break it up you two … Ultimo’s tux isn’t worth 20 bucks and this isn’t the P.T.A’s show!!
*Pain tells Canceler to move back and addresses Curly … but before he can say anything … Mr. Big claps his immense hands together creating a huge thunderclap of a sound right next to a now shaking Moniqua. Silencing the dog for the first time ever … Moniqua is shocked as Fru-Fru shrinks into her arms. Billy nudges Ultimo*
BILLY: Why didn’t we think of that?
UC: Probably because we don’t have hands the size of frying pans ..
*Prinicipal Pain turns attention back to himself and Curly*
PAIN: So... Mr. Long, I think that we deserve the title shot much more than those fashion rejects, don't you agree? I mean... can you even name a team more ruthless and skilled then ourselves?
*Pain looks at the Nyrds and shrugs his shoulders*
PAIN: These two aren’t even out of school yet so I don’t think you would count them as a threat. So I suggest you give those tag team title shots ... to the P.T.A.
*Curly climbs up to the top of Mr. Big’s Shoulders as the ring is getting quite crowded*
CURLY: Look we can all make claims about who should be the number one contender but the truth of the matter is …
*Suddenly ‘High Voltage’ plays as Mike and Joe Ragnal come out on the ramp, mics in hand. The crowd goes wild as the former tag champs prepare to speak*
MIKE: Excuse us, people! I dunno whether it’s you or me or not, but all you guys are INSANE! I mean, come on, what makes YOU guys viable for the tag belts?! PTA, Joe and I KILLED you at Rebirth! Nyrds, we’ve beaten the both of you not once, but TWICE! Chocula, Ubermark, just remember, Joe and I have beaten you in singles action, but just because we lost as a tag team, DOESN’T MEAN poopy! In fact, you guys pretty much cheated in that match from last week, so why SHOULD you guys have the opportunity to take the belts off of them?!
Billy: "Hey Mike don’t get too worked up … after all we beat you when it mattered making us number one contenders!"
*Joe is handed the mic by Mike … as the Crowd chants ‘Billy can’t get some!’ .. Billy tries to ignore it*
JOE: What we’re saying Billy is, since one way or another we’ve beaten ALL your butts big time FOR the tag team titles, there’s only ONE NAME good enough to take on Curly & Big! And that name…is RAGNAL!
UC: "I think there's a Pizza Pocket commercial being filmed somewhere and they need someone to say "Radtacular to the max!". Little Joe, you'd be perfect for that."
*The Ragnals angry at the cheap shots by the HBMS head for the ring … Curly still on Big’s shoulders tries to regain some order as the eight in-ring men glare at each other. The crowd still hyped by the Ragnals appearance fall into a quiet murmur as they know all these ego’s can’t remain passive in the ring for much longer. Mr. Big is trying to keep control and then Curly decides to speak ..*
CURLY: What do ya know … everyone wants to be number one contender … and that’s great we’ll just leave and let all of you sort this out yourselves …
*The 4 other teams watch as Mr. Big with Curly reach the rampway side of the ring next to one of the marble pillars … the Toga girls quickly leave the ring, as Curly is about to leave Joe and Mike Ragnal jump up onto the Apron in front of them*
JOE: Hey! Where do you think your going?
CURLY: Well Joe, I was just going to head down town to the local nightclubs for a bit of R&R, but now I thought about it, I might stop off at the Ragnal family home and show your mom some real C'n'L …
MIKE: What is that supposed to mean?
CURLY: Well Mike … we have you, we have Joe, we have Linda .. and hell we even have Chrysta …so she must be a complete S*** in bed!
*Joe and Mike don’t even hesitate at that comment and launch themselves at Curly with twin missile Dropkicks ... Curly dives out of the way leaving Mr. Big to take the impact … Mr. Big staggers and then receives some hang time on the ropes from the Ragnals. Curly runs off in the other direction and without looking smacks right into Ultimo’s nether regions. Ultimo collapses in pain knocking the Amber Jug of wine over onto the Nyrds and Principal Pain. This erupts into a huge brawl between all five teams. Punches are thrown and taken by all. Security comes out but on seeing the anarchy leave the 5 teams to it. Moniqua exits the ring quickly with Fru-Fru as Joe and Joel go up against Pain and Curly, whilst Billy and Canceler try and decimate the two Mikes. Meanwhile Ultimo slips out under the bottom rope to avoid Mr. Big. He points to his head indicating his smarts to the ringside fans but Joel has seen him and leaps over the top rope with a suicide plancha! Back in the ring and Mike (Nyrds) is getting double teamed by Billy and Canceler whilst the two Ragnals go after Mr. Big and Curly.*
*Suddenly the crowd goes ballistic! … its Spaz and Spyke of Gen Tech!! .. they leap the guard rails and rush the ring chairs in hand! Canceler turns just in time to see two metal chairs bounce off his skull taking him over the top rope to the floor. Pain seeing this follows and The P.T.A and Gen Tech brawl off into the crowd. Back in the ring and Billy is still fighting Mike (Nyrds). As they fight Mr. Big leans on the top rope sending them both to the outside where they join Ultimo and Joel who are being held apart by some officials .. both shouting and trying to rip each other apart. Mr. Big turns around to find a dazed Curly getting double teamed by the Ragnals. A double suplex hits the mark! Curly lands near Mr. Big’s feet he still has a mike in hand but is on the whole out of it. The Ragnals nod to one another and go to attack Mr. Big, but in a show of pure strength Mr. Big pushes one of the immense stone pillars over!!*
KERRRRAASSHHGNGG!
*The ring collapses under the mighty force of the falling marble pillar ... A ‘Holy S***’ chant starts up! … The Ragnals try to get to there feet after the ring collapsed ... but there is too much debris to move. This gives Mr. Big time to escape up the ramp with Curly over his shoulder … Mr. Big takes up the last mike as the HBMS and Nyrds are escorted separately backstage by officials!*
MR. BIG: ... Hey Ragnals! … you want us in your fun house? … Well the only House you will be going into is … The House of Pain!!
*Joe and Mike stand on the remains of the broken ring furious at what has just happened … Mr. Big turns to go through the curtain … the camera zooms in on Curly hanging over Big’s shoulder … he still has a microphone and raises himself but is still dazed and confused*
CURLY: What a Show! … HBH’s show has nothing on what just happened on the Colossal Colis …
*As Mr.Big ducks under the Toomi-tron and walks into the backstage area, Curly cracks the back of his head on the giant screen, knocking him out and ending the loudmouths non-stop jabbering … The Ragnals trudge after them ... A duelling ‘Let’s go Ragnals’ & ‘Let’s go Nyrds’ chant is heard as the camera sweeps over the devastation*
(cut to commercial for the latest in High-Performance Vacuum cleaners)
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Post by Banned Member on Mar 15, 2006 17:36:45 GMT -5
*A locker room door is slightly open,and we can hear audio coming out though the door.*
Audio: And Merc has just buried JZ alive!!!!
*Sum Guy walks into the shot.*
SG: I'm Sum Guy, and I like to lick moldy bread!! I'm here outside The Outlaw Chris James locker room. It is rumored that he has a big announcement for us all!
*Sum Guy knocks on the door*
OL: Come in you sick little man!
SG: Yes Outlaw as you are well aware that Brett Michaels has stated he wants that Tri-State Title of yours.
OL: I know that! You think I'm gonna let some has been take my title? I worked to damn long to finally win some gold here in EWT.
SG: Well least your he....
OL:Shut up little man. You see Brett I bring something to this belt that you never could. Class, and respect, but I have doubt in my mind that Outlaw can beat you. You see these bags under my eyes that's cause I spent sleepiness nights wondering if I was doing the right thing I'm about to do.
SG: What are....
OL:Let me finish!
SG:Sorry....
OL: You see Brett I have decided that Outlaw will not defend the title against you. I have decided on advice from my consultant Jillian that for one night only at the next EWT PPV it will be the THE MERCENARY vs Brett Michaels!
SG: What your kidding me the Mercenary is an insane mad man!
OL: Thats right Guy. You see Outlaw is all for having fun, but fun time is over! The Mercenary will show Brett how serious, and brutal he can be as he makes him bleed like a geyser at Yosemite Park!
SG: But most matches don't cause.....
OL: thats cause I'm issuing a challenge that this match be a hardcore street fight for the EWT Tri State Title.
SG: And what if Brett refuses?
OL: He won't refuse he is a greedy pig after all. Now excuse me I have to go meet Jillian.
*Outlaw walks off.*
SG: You heard it here folks! The Mercenary to return for One night only at the next PPV!!! I'm Sum Guy, and I like to put cheese wiz between my legs!
*Scene fades to black.*
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Post by HMARK Center on Mar 15, 2006 23:42:02 GMT -5
Bobby Cruise: The following match-up is scheduled for one fall with a 20 minute time limit.
< The lights dim and go to blue as ”Never Let Me Down Again/Disposable Teens rocks the PA as the fans rise to their feet; once the strobe lights hit, HMark makes his way out, donning the usual long leather jacket with the priest’s sash hanging down from both sides, his hands extended in the Fallen Dragon sign.>
BC: Introducing first, from Newark, New Jersey, weighing in at 218 pounds, the Fallen Dragon, HitmanMark!
<HMark throws his hood back and begins walking around the ringside area, playing to the fans, cupping his ear to hear the chants. The Fallen Legion is still in the front row, commencing their bowing, and others follow suit. As HMark gets into the ring, standing on the turnbuckles, his music fades out.>
<”Danger! High Voltage!” by Electric Six begins to play, and the fans sound excited, with one giving an audible “Oooooh yeah, sexy time, baby!”>
BC: His opponent, from Seattle, Washington, weighing 190 pounds…SPANKY!
<The valor-tights wearing superstar shimmies his way onto the entrance ramp, shimmying to the funky beat of Electric Six, and doing the “Spanky Dance” (spinning your fists, turning 90 degrees, repeat), while donning an obscenely oversized pair of sunglasses.>
Dave Prazak: <on commentary> Pretty obvious that Spanky’s here for a good time, Lenny Leonard!
Lenny: No need to go over how good this guy is, and its clear he’s here for a great match and a chance to enjoy himself.
<As Spanky/Kendrick makes his way into the ring, he almost continues the dance…but shouts over at HMark, who’s turned around, leaning against the turnbuckle in concentration. HMark turns around, giving a “Who? Me?”, as Spanky starts motioning for him to come to the middle of the ring. The music continues to play as Spanky restarts his dance, and points to HMark, wanting him to join in. HMark gives him a “you’re @#$%ing joking” looking, but Spanky insists…>
Crowd: DANCE, SUCKA, DANCE! DANCE, SUCKA, DANCE!
DP: You know, I’m pretty sure HMark is hiding something here.
LL: Yeah, I’ve seen enough of his Japanese work to know he can bust out a move if the need arises.
<Spanky insists, HMark turns around to walk away…and then darts right back, shuffling his feet and grooving from side to side, giving a shimmy and a shake, and joining Spanky in a Spanky Dance, to an incredibly large pop from the crowd.>
DP: There it is! You can only see this kind of action in the EWT…or at your local arcade most Friday nights!
LL: HMark very clearly giving a dance-homage to a puro friend of his, Spicy Unicorn Man! Although I’ve heard those two have never been seen in the same building together…
<”Danger! High Voltage!” finally fades out as HMark and Spanky go to their corners, and the bell rings. Spanky starts the fans clapping as the two circle each other, before both reach in for a quick handshake. An immediate collar and elbow tieup leads to Spanky wrenching in a headlock, as HMark attempts to push him back off the ropes. Spanky holds it in though, giving a “yeeeah!” to the crowd. Again, HMark pushes him off the ropes, this time successfully. Spanky charges back with a shoulderblock, and HMark goes down. Spanky runs the ropes again, but HMark jumps up, leapfrogs, and on the return, hits a drop toe hold, floats over, and begins lightly smacking Spanky on both sides of his head, before standing up, chuckling.>
<Spanky gives him a “Why I oughta” look, and wags the “shame on you” finger at him. The two circle each other again, but this time HMark slips on a hammerlock, and looks to make it into an abdominal stretch by hooking his leg around Spanky’s; the Washingtonian responds by moving around in circles, with HMark still clinging onto the hammerlock, doing anything to avoid the hold. Eventually, both men fall out of the hold, but both catch themselves and somersault to opposite corners, before standing in a Karate Kid standoff, getting a laugh and applause from the crowd.>
<The two men circle once more, and this time HMark hits an armdrag, and locks the arm with Spanky on the mat. Spanky eventually fights to his feet, twists, and runs up the turnbuckle to escape, only to eat a spinning heel kick from HMark. Spanky is taken aback, and HMark just shrugs.>
HMark: Been working on my striking game!
<The two go at it again, but this time Spanky goes after the leg, taking HMark to the mat. Spanky goes for the leg, but HMark nips up, tries to dive down for an arm hold, but Spanky moves, the two continue to scramble, each trying to grab a limb, until HMark manages to lock in an Indian Deathlock. He stands, signaling to the crowd that he’s ready for his patetented bridge back, but Spanky manages to lunge up, loosen HMark’s legs, and go for an inside cradle! He gets a two count, and HMark attempts an Oklahoma Roll, but gets the same outcome. Another standoff, and the fans applaud.>
<Both men continue to be evenly matched for a good while, going move for move, hold for hold, and pin attempt for pin attempt. The action has largely stayed on the mat and in the ring, and the fans are really appreciating the athletic showing they’re getting. After a little while, Spanky goes for a backslide, but HMark turns around and tries to lock him in for Cattle Mutilation. Spanky struggles against the move he knows very well, and slips an arm free, wrapping it around HMark’s head. He runs to the turnbuckle, going for Sliced Bread #2/the Shiranui, but HMark holds him up in mid-air before he can land it. Twisting Spanky around in mid-air, HMark brings him down with a Blue Thunder Driver! A cover only gets 2, though, but HMark tries to end the match.>
<He scoops Spanky up, and sets him up for the Golden Gate Swing, but Spanky reverses, INSIDE CRADLE!>
1!
2!
<No! HMark rolls out, but grabs Spanky’s legs, and flips over into a bridge, putting his shoulders on the mat!>
1!
2!
<Not quite. As both men rise, Spanky leaps up onto HMark’s shoulder, and tries for a Victory Roll…No, HMark stops him halfway, ala Owen on Bret at WM X!>
1!
2!
3!
<The bell rings>
BC: The winner of this bout, the Fallen Dragon, HitmanMark!
<”Disposable Teens” hits as the audience claps in appreciation of both guys’ work. Spanky and HMark exchange a handshake, but as Spanky leaves, HMark calls for a mic.>
HMark: Cut the music. <PA dies down> You guys enjoy that? <Crowd cheers> Fun, wasn’t it? <more cheers> And, by God, folks, give it up for the Spankster, that mother can GO. <big pop and some chants of “SPANKY! SPANKY!”>
But you know what you guys just saw? You just watched a great wrestling exhibition. You didn’t see senseless violence, you didn’t see pent up anger and aggression; you just watched two guys who love what they do giving you <points to the crowd> something you can remember on your ride home tonight. Something you can turn to your bud and say “Damn, that was awesome!” about. We gave you…wrestling.
Which brings me to Trik Turner. <crowd heat> I said it before, Trik: you and I aren’t going to settle this in a cage, or a cell, or with barbed wire, with tables, fire, caskets, kennels from hell, NOTHING like that. <walks up to camera, looks into it> At long last, Trik, you and are gonna settle this like professionals. You wanted a street fight in our first match; you got beat. We had a chamber the next time; you got fried.
Now, there are no gimmicks. There is nothing to fall back on. It comes to skill, present vs. future, man-to-man, in the purest of wrestling traditions. You say, Turner, that you’re going to beat me at my own game. You know what I say to that, Turner: I wouldn’t have it any other way. I want you to prove it to me, and I want you to prove to the Legion <points to row of fans in the front, who all start cheering> …dudes, not just you guys. <laughter> I’ve got more fans than just those guys, right? <big crowd pop, various fans in Fallen Legion and “House that HMark Built” shits stand up>…Trik, I want you to show this entire industry just how good you are. If you think you can do that by beating me with my own moves, so be it.
Just remember this, kid: you couldn’t beat me when you wanted a hardcore fight. Don’t think you’re about to beat me when you want a submissions match. It’s Gospel, Turner. Say. Your. Prayers.
<”Disposable Teens” hits again as HMark makes his way up the ramp, playing to his fans.>
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Ragnal
Game Genie
Yanno what they say: All toasters toast El Dandy
Posts: 8,677,836
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Post by Ragnal on Mar 16, 2006 3:45:47 GMT -5
BEAUTY Beauty is a figure which is used to describe how wonderful something is. In this instance, the ocean. *Cut to en old EWT promo* MIKE: Take a look, fellas, because THIS is the best of the women EWT has to offer! But one false move, and she'll go ballistic! Beneath it's waves, the ocean contains many wonders to behold. It has many exotic creatures beneath the ocean floors. JOE: You seriously believe you can take her on?! Look at her, she may not be Bertha Faye, but she'll tear you apart! Soon, one of the ocean's exotic creatures returns...for she truly is...the Ocean's Beauty.
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Post by pta on Mar 16, 2006 5:44:29 GMT -5
Announcer: And now it's time for the EWT Rewind... brought to you by Smeegles Candy. With a name that stupid, it has to be good!
It replays the recent P.T.A. vs Spaz and Limey match... ending in disqualification... showing all the havoc caused by the P.T.A and ending with them laughing at Generation Tech in the ring.
Cut back to the ring.
Announcer: The following contest is scheduled for one fall.
Suddenly, the familiar theme of Mankind starts up and he makes his way down to the ring. He has Mr. Socko with him as usual.
Announcer: From Long Island New York, weighing in at 297 pounds... Mankind!!!
Mankind waves to the crowd... getting a huge pop, as he makes his way into the ring. Of course... he doesn't know who his opponent is... as he waits in the ring.
Soon though, the seldom heard theme of the Canceler hits and he trudges out to the ramp entrance, getting huge amounts of heat.
Announcer: And from Russia... weighing in at 515 pounds... presenting the P.T.A... The Canceler!!!
Mankind goes a bit wide eyed as Canceler slowly heads down to the ring. He cracks his knuckles a bit as he walks down... stepping into the ring and looking down at Mankind. Mankind looks back up... as the bell rings. He immediately starts trying to pound away at Canceler with some stiff fists, but to no effect. Canceler then charges forward, almost decapitating his opponent with a huge lariat... turning him inside out! He groans in pain as Canceler reaches down... lifting him up with little difficulty by the throat. He then tosses him across the ring with a choke toss!
Mankind goes flying, hitting the mat hard. He groans... rolling around in pain as Canceler then starts running forward, leaping up and going for a leg drop to the throat. Mankind just barely manages to roll out of the way in time. Canceler looks a bit surprised as Mankind backs up, then charges forward... nailing a running knee right to the face of Canceler! The crowd pops as the big man falls to the mat... Mankind goes for the cover. 1.....2
CANCELER POWERS OUT! Mankind goes flying... as the big man sits up... shaking off the cob webs, then getting back to his feet slowly. Mankind gets to his feet at the same time. He immediately charges at Canceler again... big mistake. Canceler grabs him for a pendulum backbreaker... Mankind yelping out in pain, then dropping back to the mat. Canceler looks down at Mankind... leaping up pretty damn high for a guy his size... with an elbow drop! It connects... Mankind again yelping out in agony. Canceler goes for the cover. 1....2.....
But Mankind gets the shoulder up! Canceler can't believe it!!! He looks absolutely shocked. Slowly, he gets back to his feet... lifting Mankind up... but he counters with some stiff shots to the stomach of Canceler. Again... no effect. Canceler looks at him... rather unimpressed. Mankind then looks back up and... pokes him in the eye. Canceler acks... temporarily as Mankind grabs Canceler... going for the Double Arm DDT!!! It connects and he goes for another cover! 1....2....
NO! Canceler manages to kick out at the very last second. Mankind gets back to his feet... reaching into his pocket and pulling out... Mr. Socko!!! The crowd goes nuts as he signals for the Mandible Claw... waiting for Canceler to get to his feet. As soon he does, he lunges forward... trying to lock the nerve hold on... but Canceler counters... shoving Mankind down hard... he looks ready to end this now. The big man walks over... hoisting up Mankind again and onto his shoulders... then slams down with the ISD!!! 1....2....
3!!! And just like that... it's all over.
Announcer: Here is your winner... The Canceler!!!
Canceler gets to his feet again... then looks down at Mankind, reaching down and RIPPING Mr. SOCKO right off his hands. He holds it up for the crowd to see... then grabs the thing by both ends and rips it in half!!! The crowd boos as Canceler smirks... dropping the now ruined sock atop Mankind... then exits the ring.
Fade to a promo for Deron Miller.
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Post by Virus aka Captain No-Nuts on Mar 16, 2006 14:21:00 GMT -5
(Virus passes by the new match board, stopping to see what his next match is. He doesn't search long, however, and breaks into a massive, devilish grin. The grin degenerates into a wild laugh as the crowd boos.)
Virus: So much for "respect is everything", eh, Limey? After only two weeks, I'm already in a match for the EWT heavyweight title. And I'm completely ready for it. You had better be ready, "mate", because your title reign is about to end... And if you don't believe that... You had better PREPARE... TO BE... INFECTED!
(Virus breaks into wild laughter again, and the camera zooms in on his face as we fade to commercial.)
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Post by #Classic Hi-Definition X on Mar 16, 2006 16:11:44 GMT -5
*Mean Gene is backstage with HBH and Cherry*
MG: I'm Mean Gene Okerlund, and joining me now is the Heartbreak Hitman Bret Michaels and Sensational Cherry. Bret, earlier the Oulaw challenged you to a hardcore street fight against The Mercenary at the next PPV. What are your thoughts on that?
HBH: My thoughts on that? Well I'd say his little plan backfired, because according to Toom E, he's going to be defending that title in a triple threat match against Gasoline and myself. Now I realize that I have two big hurdles standing in my way of getting to that title. But I believe that there is no mountain the Heartbreak Hitman can't climb. You see Mean Gene, when you're as great as I am, you're destined for great things. And right now, I am destined to be the next Tri-State Champion. There's nothing Outlaw, Gasoline, or anybody else can do about that.
*Just then, Gasoline enters the picture with a serious look at HBH*
Gas: If you honestly think that winning the Tri-State title will be a cakewalk for you, then you're a bigger fool than I thought you were. If you want to even get a sniff at that title, you're gonna have to get through the Gas-powered monster first. And I'll tell you right now that that ain't gonna happen. Winning this title will bring me one step closer to becoming EWT Heavyweight Champion, and I will go through anything- *looks at HBH* or ANYONE- to get to it.
*Gasoline walks off. HBH shrugs him off*
HBH: Ah, so many dreams. It's a shame I'll have to dash them when I win the triple threat and become the NEW Tri-State Champion. Let's go, Cherry.
*HBH and Cherry walk off as we cut to the next segment*
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Post by Superior Dragon on Mar 16, 2006 18:07:33 GMT -5
Cut to Sum Guy with the Sucidal Idolz and Jade Chung.
SG: Hello I'm Sum Guy and I mark for dirty diapers. Here with me now are two of the newest rookies here, the Suicidal Idolz. Guys, you have a match this week against Ultimo Chocula and Billy Ubermark, the HBMS. What are your thoughts?
Twizted: Sum, this week we have an opporitunity to go against two of the seasoned veterans here in the EWT. But I'm letting you know right now, we will do anything we need to do to come out on top in the match and prove that we belong here. Right Saint?
Saint: Hmm? Oh, yeah.
Twiz: Furtheluva.....Anyway, Chocula, Ubermark, we may be new to the EWT, but that doesn't mean we're rookies. Come time for our match, we will show you why we are called the Suicidal Idolz. Because we will put anything at risk, even our own body, just to defeat you.
Sum: Well, those are some very interesting words. Now, Saint, what is up with you and Jade Chung?
Saint: In due time Guy. In due time. (leaves with Jade)
Twiz: Where the hell did he.....forget it. Virgin, Choc, get ready and be prepared for our match.
Sum: Well, that about wraps it up here. I'm Sum Guy, and my favorite letter is the squiggly! Back to you in the studio.
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Post by dorf on Mar 16, 2006 23:26:59 GMT -5
*Shane Douglas is in the back with Dorf*
Shane Douglas: ...here in Dorf's lockerroom as he looks puzzled. Dorf...what's wrong?
Dorf: Why am I facing the Red Rooster? That guy hasn't clucked since 1989. I can beat him in two moves. Who made the decision?
Shane Douglas: *reading through his ear piece* (quietly) oh, okay. (normal voice) Dorf, I have been informed by Toom E Dangerously that your facing the Red Rooster, due to the idea of EWTs new acquisition, the Hoss Ninja.
Dorf: IT'S A TRICK! THE HOSS NINJA IS ALREADY IN HERE!! YOU SET THIS UP DIDN'T YA?! THIS INTERVIEW IS OVER! *Dorf leaves in a paranoid state*
Shane Douglas: How did he know that you were there? *looks at Hoss Ninja, but is not visible on the camera*
(WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH-ing noises occur)
*Camera traces back to Shane Douglas*
Shane Douglas: Damn, your stealthy...Hoss Ninja!
*The Hoss Ninja just shrugs his shoulders and makes another wooooosh noise and disappears from the camera, as it fades.*
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Post by chanceconfidence on Mar 17, 2006 8:06:34 GMT -5
Cut to the outside of the EWT Arena, showing Chance Confidence drive up and walk out. But this time, he's not alone... as the next two to come out are... oh goody, it's Test and Albert... AKA, T & A. Chance looks at them.
Chance: Okay... here's the deal. You protect me from that crazy bird boy... and I'll give you what you want.
Test: * Monotone *Okay... you can count on us.... right Albert?
Albert: BLARGH!!!! ARGH!!!! GRAH!!!!
Test: ... Right!
Chance sighs a bit to himself.
Chance: Maybe I should've gone with some better bodyguards.
He walks into the entrance... with Test and Albert following him... Test hitting his head against the door...
Fade to the next segment.
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