|
Post by Toom E. Guci on Feb 5, 2007 10:20:33 GMT -5
EWT Online Exclusive:
EWT officials confirm that they have come to terms with not 1, but 2 former World Championship Wrestling Heavyweight Champions to appear this Sunday at the Royal Pain In the Ass Rumble.
This leaves many to ponder just whom it will be on top of the 5 EWT Alumni.
|
|
|
Post by dorf on Feb 5, 2007 13:23:25 GMT -5
EWT.com Online ExclusivePosted on Febtober 1st, 20-07 Dorf's Doctor Visit*Camera zooms up and shows the entrance of Dorf in the hospital of what appears to be waiting for the doctor's response. Just then, on schedule, the doctor comes right in...* Doctor: Well, we got some good news anddd....we have some bad news to share as well. Dorf: *nervously* Tell me the bad news...first...please. Doctor: The bad news, is this last truamatizing experience of being a paraplegic in your match against Ratings and Ape's teasings has increased your chances of a shorter life span. The shorter life span can or can not be good at all, especially for your past in EWT. Dorf: That's not as bad as I hoped out to be. Doctor: Yes, but it will affect you down the road, unless you fight over your mental issues...this is something medicine cannot fix at all, in all my years of doctorology, I have not seen something so potentially threatening from a simple CAT Scan. My only solution is to turn any fear or mental problem and eliminate it with a positive conclusion. Dorf: But.... Doctor: No And's, if's, or but's. Got it? Dorf: *pauses, and disappointingly agrees* ....yes.... Doctor: You have to stay positive on your goals or else this "stress" will ruin you, Dorf. *changes direction* If this helps you any better, the good news is that your physically healthy and there is nothing wrong with you in that retrospect. I'm only a simple doctor, but a Paraplegic Death match is not the way to go...but I have to support it to make you feel as positive as you can be. Dorf: Thank you for the support, I can understand from a medical point of view, that makes you wonder "Why the hell are these guys killing each other?" Well, there's a reason, Ape ruined Heiden-Dorf for life....and there's nothing I can do about it now....except make ape suffer to the point of no return. *Doctor quietly walks away as dorf stares right in the camera* Come Royal Pain in the Ass Rumble 3, ape....this is not only for Heiden-Dorf, I will do this for the fans to finally get rid of you and by means I said I'd do anything and I MEAN anything....you have put me through SO MUCH mental anguish and misery that I want to do this now.... ...but the building of time helps ...time helps over matter ...When the bell goes ding.... ding...ding...THAT IS WHEN YOU GET...YOUR JUST DO! If you only knew yer soul, and shut yer trap...none of this s*** would ever happened. *Smacks cameraman down and camera fades to black online.*
|
|
|
Post by Ultimo Chocula on Feb 5, 2007 13:45:34 GMT -5
Source: USAhooray.com
A bomb squad was called in when a suspicious looking device was found on the side of a bridge in Boston. The area was evacuated as the crew worked for two hours to make sure the bomb was not detinated at a cost of $500,000. In the end it turns out the device was not a bomb but a promotional advertisement for EWT superstar Ultimo Chocula's new DVD: "Super Rad! Ultimo Chocula's Greatest Hits". The adverstisement consisted of Ultimo's symbol (see below) that would glow in the dark. After wards Boston officials were out for blood when it appeared they would look like buffoons for overreacting to what adds up to nothing more than a crummy ad.
"This is nothing more than a cruel joke!" said Boston mayor and old fart Robert Blathmayer. "Whoever did this thought it would be funny to pull a bomb hoax! Well let me tell you, sonny! This isn't funny! No siree bob! My wife had an episode, she was so frightened! When I find out who did this I'll hang that bastard up by his Buster Browns!"
In response, Ultimo had this to say to local reporters. "It's a *BEEP!*ing Lite Bright. Chill the *BEEP!* out."
|
|
Sajoa Moe
Patti Mayonnaise
Did you get that thing I sent ya?
A man without gimmick.
Posts: 39,683
|
Post by Sajoa Moe on Feb 5, 2007 13:59:12 GMT -5
www.funkymunkybuttnewz.com- The reason Raskall and Trunk have not been seen on EWT television since their match with Team LEO is because they respectfully requested a brief leave of absence so they could go on a two-week tour of Japan, where they will be facing the team of Vader and Satoshi Najima in the undercard of the 2/7 event at the Tokyo Egg Dome. They will return to the States in time for the Royal Pain in the Ass Rumble. - The interviewer vs. interviewer angle involving Lean Gene Cummerbund and Phantom of Krankor has been dropped, mostly due to fan indifference and Krankor's insistence that he would destroy anyone who did not comply with his plans. - The Phantom of Krankor has been given his notice and we wish him well in his future endeavors.
|
|
Ratings
Dennis Stamp
Has a box of scraps
"YAY!"
Posts: 4,236
|
Post by Ratings on Feb 5, 2007 15:34:04 GMT -5
Source: teh1337wrestlen00z.comIn their down-time from EWT, Maxx Awesome & Erik Majors, collectively known as Boogie Knights 3000 have captured their second official Kapoutland Pro Wrestling Tag-Team Championship. Awesome has also been seen fighting for the ROS Championship at the promotions last two PPVs.
|
|
Indigocrates
Unicron
I got bored. Decided to become a philosopher. Just 'cause.
Posts: 2,953
|
Post by Indigocrates on Feb 8, 2007 20:44:07 GMT -5
www.wrestlepedia.orgThe reason Christopher Indigo vs. Mysth for the EWT Toolshed Title was not aired last week was because EWT's feed was cut off before the match happened, and thus had not been seen by viewers at home, so the match will be rebroadcasted this week. EWT apologizes for the error.
|
|
|
Post by The Player Haters on Feb 11, 2007 7:58:45 GMT -5
BREAKING NEWS: PLAYER HATERS DONE ALREADY
After only appearing on EWT a few times, including their poor performance at RPITAR, the Player Haters (Glitz, Dymondback & Albino Tyrone) have been removed from EWT's active roster.
This mostly due to their attitude backstage. With their constant insults and racial slurs, the trio became the most hated people in the EWT locker room.
When Toom E. Dangerously heard of this, he offered Glitz the role of HEAD OF TALENT RELATIONS and Dymondback and Albino Tyrone were offered positions as ROAD AGENTS.
All three men accepted their respected positions.
|
|
|
Post by The Lach is very tired on Feb 12, 2007 1:35:13 GMT -5
www.spazwrestling.comRUMBLE THOUGHTS Hey everyone, I'm a bit sick & sorry as i write this. The rumble night started off great for me. I staked my claim to get another shot at the EWT Title but then the rumble itself didn't quite go to plan. I was put out of it by Trik Turner, who has proceeded to badmouth me. He thinks he has earnt that right? No damn way! He says I'm arrogant? I'm not arrogant I just tell it like it is. My focus now is to regain the EWT World Heavyweight Title. Trik will just have to wait his turn. Spaz
|
|
Sajoa Moe
Patti Mayonnaise
Did you get that thing I sent ya?
A man without gimmick.
Posts: 39,683
|
Post by Sajoa Moe on Feb 12, 2007 18:01:45 GMT -5
www.pwsnorch.comFollowing is the full list (in order) of the participants in the Royal Pain in the Ass Rumble, along with order of eliminations and number of eliminations by each participant. ENTRY ORDER1. Crauswell 2. Christopher Indigo 3. jzbadblood 4. Merc 5. Dusty Rhodes 6. Spaz 7. Albino Tyrone 8. Trik Turner 9. Mysth 10. Dymondback 11. Sum Guy 12. Joe One 13. Mutilated 14. Marcus Trunk 15. Rick Raskall 16. Benz 17. A-Bomb 18. Corpse 19. Mike Ragnal 20. Oceanic 21. David Arquette 22. Cassinova 23. Tutor Tyreese 24. Ultimo Chocula 25. Daryl Dragon 26. Vince Russo 27. Ogre 28. "Insecticidal" Andy Duke 29. Ghostface 30. Curtrok 31. Wraith 32. Chad Michaels 33. Redface Rodgers 34. Jason Jupiter 35. Ratings 36. Jimmy Thunder 37. Mike Corral ORDER OF ELIMINATIONCrauswell by Merc Chris Indigo by jzbadblood Dusty Rhodes by Spaz Albino Tyrone by Merc Dymondback by Trik Turner Sum Guy by Merc Trik Turner by Spaz Spaz by Trik Turner Mysth by Mutilated Mutilated by Merc Benz by Merc Joe One by Stevie Richards Corpse by Merc Merc by Rick Raskall Rick Raskall by Mr. Big A-Bomb by Mike Ragnal Marcus Trunk by Mike Ragnal/jzbadblood jzbadblood by Oceanic David Arquette by Mike Ragnal Cassinova by Tutor Tyreese Tutor Tyreese by Mike Ragnal Vince Russo by Ultimo Chocula/Daryl Dragon/Oceanic/Mike Ragnal Ogre by Ultimo Chocula/Daryl Dragon/Oceanic/Mike Ragnal/Andy Duke Ghostface by Andy Duke Andy Duke by Ultimo Chocula/Daryl Dragon Mike Ragnal and Curtrok by Ultimo Chocula Wraith by Oceanic Oceanic by (apparently) Ratings Chad Michaels by Ratings Redface Rodgers by Ratings Mike Corral by Jimmy Thunder/Jason Jupiter Jason Jupiter by Ultimo Chocula Jimmy Thunder by Ultimo Chocula/Ratings Ratings by Ultimo Chocula ELIMINATIONS BY PARTICIPANT8: Ultimo Chocula 6: Merc, Mike Ragnal 4: Ratings 3: Oceanic, Daryl Dragon 2: jzbadblood, Spaz, Trik Turner, Andy Duke 1: Mutilated, Stevie Richards (non-participant), Rick Raskall, Mr. Big (non-participant), Tutor Tyreese, Jimmy Thunder, Jason Jupiter 0: Crauswell, Chris Indigo, Dusty Rhodes, Albino Tyrone, Dymondback, Sum Guy, Mysth, Benz, Joe One, Corpse, A-Bomb, Marcus Trunk, David Arquette, Cassinova, Vince Russo, Ogre, Ghostface, Wraith, Chad Michaels, Redface Rodgers, Mike Corral
|
|
Boku AKA Da Green Guy
El Dandy
WC's Resident Pirate Otaku and Official Scapegoat
Always and Forever, Hurricane.
Posts: 8,371
|
Post by Boku AKA Da Green Guy on Feb 16, 2007 2:18:13 GMT -5
www.EWTPirates.comBarty Teach is again in hot water with management, after being arrested in a drunked bar brawl. This, with the reports that his ring work is still lacking, makes his chance of being fired all the more likely.
|
|
Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
|
Post by Deleted on Feb 17, 2007 8:47:53 GMT -5
www.TJT-online.net"A lot of people have been asking why we decided to take matters into our own hands and help Minipax assault Rated X. We're still pretty new here, so we're putting a bit of an impression into the other, so-called "stars" of EWT. While neither me, Jupiter or Thunder will tell you the main reasons for our attack, we will tell you that will all be revealed soon enough. just hang tight, sit back, and have patience; we'll make sure to have the next in our promo series soon. And we guarantee, if you liked the other ones, you'll love this upcoming one." -Terina
|
|
Sajoa Moe
Patti Mayonnaise
Did you get that thing I sent ya?
A man without gimmick.
Posts: 39,683
|
Post by Sajoa Moe on Feb 17, 2007 17:36:45 GMT -5
www.pwsnorch.com-There was a rumor going around that the now-confirmed Tag Team Elimination Chamber Match was going to be scrapped, based on the events of the RPITAR and the announcement of the Leviathan Chamber. However, Toom E. Dangerously ordered the match to stay on the card in order to finish up the current tag title storyline. Ultimo Chocula (King Choculon) has agreed to work both matches, despite their hellacious nature.
|
|
The Line
Patti Mayonnaise
Real Name: Bumkiss. Stanley Bumkiss.
Peanut Butter & JAAAAAMMMM!
Posts: 36,698
|
Post by The Line on Feb 17, 2007 17:43:41 GMT -5
www.Mastercharge.comMr. Andrew Patrick Duke, known as "Insecticidal" Andy Duke's credit card has been maxed out, due to a large spending spree. He tried to use it at a classy resteraunt in Manhatten, but was denied. The young woman he was with promptly threw water in his face and left. Mr. Duke maxed out his card by purchasing thousands of dollars in wrestling tapes and Dvds from all over the world. -John Thomas, Mastercharge.
|
|
|
Post by 'Foretold' Joker on Feb 17, 2007 18:03:44 GMT -5
~ JN Insider ~ We tell you what you didn't already know! ~
- Backstage staff, technicians and officials are concerned about the imminent arrival of a rather dangerous water based creature that will be involved at the upcoming March PPV. WE were going to ask Candy Girl for her thoughts but apparently she has been hiding in the ladies toilet and won't come out.
- Mr. Big assaulted a fan for mentioning March 4th at an autograph session recently. Some other EWT superstars reckon this is taking kayfabe a bit too far.
- Mina is set to become a permanent part of EWT as Curly Long's midget mistress. This may be due to the fact that the couple are not acting in there segments. When asked Curly just winked, and then told us to be ready for the release of the DVD 'Multiple Long Nights'.
- D'Zee was seen at EWT HQ recently, no word if she was here to rejoin EWT or just seeing old friends.
~ Credit ~ The Masked Laughing Fool.
|
|
|
Post by Banned Member on Feb 17, 2007 19:27:04 GMT -5
Mercnews.com
Results to Mercs petition have been over whelming. As the signatures have reached over the 10,000 mark. Merc has been rumored to be bugging EWT wrestlers backstage as well.
|
|
|
Post by The Bad Man on Feb 20, 2007 11:55:11 GMT -5
- - D'Zee Homepage - -
Yo what's up to all my fans at the EWT. I am currently doing well at the Women's International Boxing Association and have got a failry decent record here 22-1-2.
Now to answer some fan-email.
Q: When are you coming back to EWT? - Bob17 A: Whilst I have been approached with several ideas about a possiblie return I am cuurently happy in my role at the Women's International Boxing Association. However never say never.
Q:What did you think of Oceanic's recent return to EWT? - Krystal. A: She's showing determination and grit I didn't think she was capable of when I last saw her. Maybe one day we should just see who is the toughest women in EWT.
Q: Who will win the Leviathan Chamber & what do you think of the match? - Larry T. A: Well Larry the match is right up my street as it should be bloody and brutal. No place for the weak that's for sure. I think Maelstrom will win and demolish everything in his path as it is his match.
Q: Who do you want to knock out in EWT? - Psycho_Goblin_Boy. A: Who's getting me down in EWT. Well I have to say that little meatball Curly Long needs a harsh right so he can know his role.
Q: Is there anyone you think may become a main event player for the future in EWT? - Jenny. A: There is some exceptional talent from what I have seen in the midcard of EWT. TJT, Andy Duke & Chris Indigo look strong but oddball Crauswell could be an outside bet if your hoping to look for the future.
- That's a bout it from me D'Zee, but watch out in that world as D'Zee may come around the corner and knock your lights out, B****s!
---------------------------
|
|
Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
|
Post by Deleted on Feb 27, 2007 22:09:13 GMT -5
www.championshipchamblis.net"This is freakin' awesome. I've got my big debut RIGHT after March 4. I've been studying my opponent, Jimmy Thunder, and the ways of his two partners, Jason Jupiter and Terina. What the match holds, I cannot pinpoint, but I hope that right there, I can have a good, clean match with Jim. He seems a little less uptight than his buddies, so I'm sure he'll be a fun guy to wrestle with. Future Star of EWT, Aaron Chamblis"
|
|
|
Post by 'Foretold' Joker on Feb 28, 2007 5:50:11 GMT -5
JN Insider - We try to fill the gaping holes of wrestling information! -
- Many wrestlers are talking about the upcoming Levithan Match. Indeed in the back it is creating huge excitement. Espeically as the Ominous Water Tank has arrived.
- Management is increasingly pleased with Mr. Big's improvement over the last few months, some say he may be inline for a push.
- A new hiring? EWT road agents have been told to hire a new wrestler for an angle that will be coming to ahead soon on EWT television.
- credit ~ JN Insider's own crack team of journalists. -
|
|
|
Post by Hulkshi Tanahashi on Mar 5, 2007 0:27:09 GMT -5
www.wayintowrestling.comA new wrestler has joined EWT. He is called "The Comedian" Bobby Riggs. Not much is known about him. He is a comedian who didn't have much luck in the world of stand-up comedy, as he got heckled and broke down on stage. Riggs recently snapped at a comedy club, attacking Mike Rose, a man who heckled him. Riggs broke Rose's leg and then beat up a bouncer and three audience members, threw a woman into a shelf of glasses, and broke the hand of the owner/MC of the club. Police officers were called to the scene, and Riggs was arrested. Detectives believe Riggs attack was premeditated as a camera crew was on hand to film it. Riggs was arrested for assault and was to be arraigned, but he was able to get off due to the fact that his arraignment never happened. There was a deadline for midnight for arraignments that night due to lack of space in L.A. County Jails. All defendants that weren't arraignments before were able to get off. Due to a large number of cases, Riggs's arraignment wasn't able to take place before midnight; and he was released on a technicality. The police, people at the club, Mr. Rose, the club owner, and the others who were attacked gave no comments about Riggs's actions. Riggs did give a statment about what he did: "I will explain everything when I appear on the Tonight Show with Jay Leno, with guest Russel Crowe, tomorrow at 11 p.m. Eastern/Pacific time." As for his wrestling background, Riggs has made several sporadic appearances in many indy promotions around country. Many promoters raved about his skills, calling him "a cross between Mike Awesome and Bret Hart," and "the best wrestler I've seen in a long time." However, Riggs rarely stayed in these promotions and left after performing a few matches. He was given an EWT contract based on rave reviews from the independent wrestling promoters he worked for. --Billy Wang, Way Into Wrestling.com. 4 March 2007.
|
|
|
Post by 'Foretold' Joker on Mar 5, 2007 5:31:36 GMT -5
JN Insider - Giving you meaty chunks of wrestling gossip.
~ Well folks March 4th 2007 is in the bag and by all accounts it has been considered a success by fans and management.
~ Curly Long was indeed injured from his fall in the elimination chamber and will be taking time off to recuperate. No word on how long he will be out.
~ Maelstrom is inactive.
~ Mr. Big now though has his moment to shine, and what a way to do it then by this disturbing alliance with Mr. Bad. Big and Bad could be a whole new kind of trouble in the tag team ranks.
- Credit Mr. Raggie Jar ~
|
|