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Post by Banned Member on Mar 13, 2007 0:09:36 GMT -5
Lillian: Its time for the Main event!! This contest is for the EWT heavyweight title, and is a Fatal Five way Elimination match!! *My Time starts up* Lillian: Making his way to the ring from Greenwich, Connecticut Triple H!!!! *Triple H makes his way down to the ring with water bottle in hand, and does his water spit in the air. To an ad mist of boos, and as his music dies down we hear the all familiar Car Crash Sound.* Lillian: Now making his way down to the ring from Long Island, New York. Mick Foley!!!!! *Foley makes his way down to the ring to a rather loud pop, and enters, and Foley, and Triple H have word. As the pyro goes off, and The Big Shows music kicks in. Foley, and HHH both exit the ring.* Lillian: Making his way down to the ring from Tampa, Florida. The Big Show!!!! *Big Show makes his way to the ring under heavy boos, and steps over the top rope, and signals for the Choke slam, and as his music dies down. If you smmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmeeeeellllllll what the Rock is Cooking is heard, and the fans pop for they know who is coming next.* Lillian: From Davie, Florida he is The Rock!!!!!!! *The Rock makes his way down to the ring, and does his four corner pose, but then the Arena gets dark, and the first bars of A Monster is Loose starts to play, and as the Red, and Black smoke fills up the top of the ramp, and the pyro goes off the fans erupt in cheers.* Lillian: And making his way to the ring from Parts Unknown! He is the EWT Heavyweight Champion!!! The Mercenary!!! *Merc makes his way to the ring with the title slung over his shoulder. Merc stops at the ring as all four of his opponents look on in hunger. Merc hand over his belt to the ref who has come to grab the title. Merc slowly takes off his coat, and hits the ring, and all four men charge after Merc. Merc manages to duck a Clothesline from Foley, and side steps a fling fore arm by the Rock. Merc is caught with a knee lift by HHH, and Big Show follows up with a big boot to the staggering Merc who rolls to the outside.
*Show stands at the ropes yelling at Merc, but is caught by a low blow by HHH. HHH turns around into a punch by Foley. Foley jabs several more punches, and winds up for a one last big one, but is hit with a club to the back of the head by the Rock. Foley turns around only to be DDT by the Rock.*
*Merc gets in the ring, and stares down the Rock. Merc throws his hand up in the air for a test of strength, and when Rock grabs hold Merc kicks Rock in the gut, and slams him to the mat. Merc is hit twice from behind by Show, and is taken to the mat. Foley comes from behind Show, and tries to side slam him, but Show proves to be to heavy, and Show elbows Foley, and Foley falls to the ground, and HHH drops a knee on Foley's face. Rock quickly bounces off the ropes, and hits Foley with the peoples elbow, and goes for the first cover
1
2
3...
No Foley gets his shoulder up in just the nick of time. Rock gets up only to be grabbed from behind by Merc who hits Rock with a reverse ddt. Merc gets up, but is grabbed Big Show for the choke slam. As Show gloats. Merc grabs Shows throat for the same move, and as the two struggle for control HHH clips Shows Knee, and Show drops to one knee, and lets go of Merc.
*Merc quickly bounces off the ropes, but is taken out by a HHH Clothesline. HHH goes over to Show who is trying to get up, and HHH nails Show several times in the head with his fist. Rock, and Mankind are duking it out in the corner, When Merc comes over, and hits Rock from behind.
*Foley, and Merc double clothesline Rock, and look at each other, and grin. Merc, and Foley walk over to HHH, and start to double team him with punches, and follow up with a double DDT. Merc, and Foley the start to kick, and punch Big Show, but Big Show no sells, and grabs Merc, and Foley by the throats, but Foley, and Merc kick Show low, and double suplex him!
*Merc acknowledges the fans that are chanting his name, Merc turns around, and gets kicked in the shin, and double armed DDT, by Foley. Foley reaches down into his pants, and the fans cheer as he pulls out a sock out of them, and circles his arm in the air waiting for Merc. Merc staggers to feet Foley sticks the sock in Mercs mouth. Merc struggles, and backs Foley into the turnbuckles. Merc than show an impressive sign of power, and lifts Foley onto the top turnbuckle. Merc then gouges Foleys eyes to make him let go of the mandible claw. Merc then climbs up, and hooks Foleys arm around his head. Merc leaps off with the Mercenary drop. Merc crawls over, and pins Foley.
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3!!!!!!!
Lillian: Mick Foley has been eliminated!!!!
*Foley rolls out of the ring, and Merc gets up slowly. Merc turns, and Rock grabs Merc for the Rock bottom. Merc manages to push Rock off, and HHH grabs the Rock, and hits a pedigree on him. HHH quickly covers.
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3!!!!!!
Lillian: The Rock has been eliminated!!!
*Rocks rolls out of the ring, and HHH gets up. Merc looks at HHH, and than at Show. HHH starts to talk to Show, and points at Merc. Show nods his head in agreement. Show, and HHH slowly advance on Merc. Merc gets an angry glare in his face. Merc than does the come here with his hand, and yells.*
Merc: Bring it on!!!!!!!!
*Show reaches Merc first, but gets knocked back with a hard right fist. HHH cokes in, but is met with a big boot. Merc goes after Show, and starts to wear him down with clotheslines. As Show staggers Merc signals for a Merc drop. Merc kicks Show in the gut, and lifts him up in the suplex position, but Merc can't hold him, and Show crashes down on top him. The ref makes the count.
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*HHH drops a knee on Show, and Show gets up pissed, and starts to argue with HHH. HHH shoves Shove, and Show responds with a thunderous punch. sending HHH to the mat. Show picks up HHH by the hair, and puts his hand around HHHs throat, and hits a choke slam, But before he can pin HHH Merc runs behind Show, and rolls him up, and holds the tights.
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3!!!!
Lillian: Big Show has been eliminated!!!
*Merc seeing that HHH is down climbs the top turnbuckle, and come off it with a Elbow drop on HHH. Merc covers HHH.
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3!!!!!!!!!
Lillian: HHH has been eliminated. The winner, and still EWT Champion Merc!!!!
*Merc asks for the mic.*
Merc: You know what I been in this company for almost two years now, and I have had my ups, and downs, but what wrestler doesn't? Yes my first Tri State title run was crap, and I live with that every damn day! Yet you fans still cheer me. That is a sign of respect right there. Respect that I don't get from these new boys in the back. I won the EWT heavyweight title in a brutal match, and you figure I be number one on the INAPTITUDE 25, but know where I'm ranked. I'll show you where I'm ranked.
*The Craptron comes 5. Merc: A fluke. That's the best way that we can explain how Mr. Out Chaps Mcgee won the EWT Championship from the great Maelstrom. This is proven by the fact that he lost a tag match to Eddie Omega and Maelstrom before the infamous Leviathan Chamber. We look forward to seeing you taste wood when Mr. Ragnal frees the EWT Championship from your waist. You wish to go against the Academy, Mr. Merc? Nobody goes against the Academy. And therefore we give you the ultimate punishment... (NO MOVEMENT)
Merc: Number five!! I was ranked by some damn internet nerd as number five!! Hell I'm being called worse than You Gene!! The guy who writes this damn ranking system has probably never heard of the guy, and is just trying to fit in with all these so called smart wrestling folks!!! Well that is just fine!!. Because no matter where I am ranked on that list or who I'm worse then! It doesn't change the fact that I'm the EWT Heavyweight Champion!! I don't care if you love it or hate it. It will be a cold day in hell before I lose this belt!!!
*After Merc holds the title over his head, out comes the Cidal Squad, with Johnathan Doe getting in first. Doe smacks Merc in the back of the head with a lariat, knocking him to his knees. Andy Duke comes in next and hits Merc with the Shining Wizard! Mike Ragnal comes in next, a steel chair in hand. Mike tells Duke to go backstage, and Duke nods, sliding out of the ring and running up the ramp. Doe grabs Merc's legs and catapults him into the ropes, and just like he did Perry Saturn, as Merc bounces back, he falls on top of Doe's knees. Mike grabs Merc next and drags him on top of the steel chair. He climbs the ropes, leaps off...HIGH VOLTAGE! Mike gets to his feet and reaches into his pocket, taking out...a can of green spray paint? Mike tosses it to Doe, and Doe shakes it up, takes the cap off, and sprays in large letters on Merc's back...
LUST
*After that, Mike looks into Merc's unconscious face, and yells at him-*
MIKE: Merc...after Dead Man Walking, you're going to remember the man that took you out.
And that name...is MIKE RAGNAL!
*Mike and Doe leave the ring, heading up the ramp as the crowd boos the crap out of them, a few throwing concession stand items as we fade to the next segment.*
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Post by Oceanic on Mar 13, 2007 13:13:49 GMT -5
Backstage Oceanic has her duffel bag slung over her shoulder and is walking out the door. The much maligned Sum Guy approaches her before she can leave and he has his trusty microphone, which he bought at Radio Shack in 1988 for $10.49 (there was mail-in a rebate)
Sum Guy: "Hi! I'm Sum Guy and I believe in Libertarian Were Rabbits. We just saw what happened in the ring when Oceanic destroyed Trish Stratus not once, but twice! What's with the second attack?"
Oceanic: "What's with anything? Why is it the fans will cheer on some blond hussy who got beat within an inch of her plastic life, but they don't give any respect to the first ever female Tri State champion? This makes no sense at all."
Sum Guy: "Actually, it does. You're not the first female Tri State champion. Mommytaker is."
Oceanic: (pause) "Well, I stand corrected. I'm only the second. So I guess that means that my accomplishment isn't really all that special after all. That I'm just copying someone else, right?"
Sum Guy: "I'm not saying that at all."
Oceanic: "You don't have to. I can see it written across your face. Nobody wants to admit that I'm worthy of this belt. Everyone looks at me like I'm some kind of novelty act. If nobody wants to take me seriously and cheer on some inflated tramp, that's just fine. I'll just have to show everyone that who they cheer for is a living joke."
Sum Guy: "Does this have anything with you not being booked for Dead Man Walking?"
Oceanic: "Not at all. That was about hurting a Barbie doll. My Dead Man Walking snub, that will be taken care of. I might not have a match but I will be there. I'm no stranger to party crashing. Now if you'll excuse me."
Oceanic turns and leaves, bumping Sum with her duffel bag on the way out. Sum Guy turns to the camera for his Final Word.
Sum Guy: "That's the news that is news. I'm Sum Guy and when I make my in ring debut my theme music will be "Sailing"."
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Post by Rick Raskall on Mar 13, 2007 15:42:51 GMT -5
Scene: A lavish outdoor patio. Rick Raskall is lounging on a comfortable reclining patio chair, wearing a white velour dressing gown. He has a chalice of wine in hand, and his other hand is getting a manicure, as well as his feet getting a pedicure. He's wearing a wireless headset and yapping to someone important.
Raskall: ...That's right, the whole hotel! And I want every single member of your staff waiting on me hand and foot!...Senior prom? What do I care? A bunch of greasy teenagers who scraped their way up the Burger King management ladder is of no concern to me! Tell them to relocate!...So what if they've been booked for several months? DO YOU KNOW WHO THE HELL I AM?!...Fine! I don't want any part of your filthy roach motel anyway! Tell those kids to have a great freakin' time!...In fact, you know what I'm gonna do? I'm gonna BUY that shithole you call a five-star hotel and burn it to the ground, and turn it into a parking lot! Tell THAT to your freakin' boss!
Raskall hangs up.
Raskall: Man, you just can't get good help these days.
Manicurist: Yes sir, Mr. Raskall.
Raskall: Did I say you could talk? I pay you to do my damn nails, not flap your gums. Are you done yet?
Manicurist: Yes sir, Mr. Raskall.
Raskall takes his hand and inspects it.
Raskall: Do you call this a manicure?
Manicurist: With all due respect, I believe it's the best job I've...
Raskall: DO YOU CALL THIS A MANICURE?! YOU MISERABLE COW!! YOU'RE FIRED!!
The manicurist runs off crying.
Raskall: There, that'll teach her. *takes a sip of wine* Ah, that's good stuff. I'll tell ya, Pedro, this is the life.
Pedicurist: I've told you before, sir, my name is Julian.
Raskall: Whatever, Paco. Hand me that mirror.
The pedicurist gives him the hand mirror.
Raskall: *looking in mirror* Now, is it just me, or have I gotten sexier in the past week? Yeah, that's got to be it. Ever since I lost that 300-pound cancerous tumor, things have really looked up. Yep, life truly begins today.
Raskall starts turning the mirror left and right, looking at his face from all angles. However, when he turns it to a certain angle, the reflection of a large, muscular man appears behind him. Raskall's eyes bug out as he whips around to look behind him.
Nothing.
Raskall turns back around, looking a bit worried.
Raskall: Hey Pepe, did you see...
Pedicurist: For the last time, it's...
Raskall: Your name is what? Does it sound a lot like "You're Fired"? Because that's your new name! YOU'RE FIRED!!
The pedicurist stomps off angrily, as Raskall settles into his chair, shaking his head.
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Post by teamireland on Mar 13, 2007 15:51:14 GMT -5
"OH, YOU DIDN'T KNOW?" "YO' ASS BETTA CALL SOMEBODAAAAAAAAAAAYYYYYYY!!!" "IT'S ME, IT'S ME! IT'S THAT D-O-DOUBLE G!" *Road Dogg continues to recite his catchphrases when he gets in the ring.* "EWT Arena, as well as the rest of the viewing world, WELCOME TO THE DOGG HOUSE!" *He's cut off as "Sweden" by The Divine Comedy begins playing & the crowd are baffled until Liam O'Neill emerges from the curtain (again, sans Coach O'Hare). Liam receives a reaction that is surprisingly positive considering what a mediocre performer he is.* David Penzer: His opponent, weighing in at 209lbs, from Cork, Ireland, LIAM...O...NEILL! *Liam continues on down the ramp, somewhat surprised by the reaction he gets. He pops a few pills & gets in the ring, posing on the turnbuckle with his arms in the air.* *Liam turns to face Road Dogg. James is doing his silly little shaky knee dance, Liam joins in & the two have bit of a dance-off until Dogg decks Liam with a solid left. Liam snaps & grabs Raod Dogg by the dread locks, smashing his head into the turnbuckle over & over. The referee calls for Liam to stop. But Liam shoves the ref down & carries on. The ref calls for the bell & throws the match out. Liam leaves the ring & forces David Penzer off his seat. Liam returns to the ring & places the chair around the unconcious Road Dogg's throat. Liam leaps from the top rope & crushes James' throat in the chair! Blood spurts from Road Dogg's mouth. Liam smears it across his chest & exits laughing. *
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Post by Hulkshi Tanahashi on Mar 13, 2007 17:19:05 GMT -5
*Backstage, "The Comedian" Bobby Riggs is watching Liam O'Niell's match and laughing.*
Comedian: HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! THAT IS HILARIOUS!!!! *wipes tears from his eyes* Those Irish sure are funny. I might have to take some more INTEREST in them. *evil laugh*
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Shake A Leg
Team Rocket
PLEASE DEAR GOD, LET HIM KEEP THE STREAK!
Posts: 966
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Post by Shake A Leg on Mar 13, 2007 17:22:14 GMT -5
(Ace is walking and over hears The Comedian)
I hope my hookers for tonight aren't as crazy as him.
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Ragnal
Game Genie
Yanno what they say: All toasters toast El Dandy
Posts: 8,677,836
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Post by Ragnal on Mar 14, 2007 0:15:25 GMT -5
LOTS AND LOTS OF COMMERCIAL FUN TIMES! *Fade into greyscaled footage of Merc throwing Maelstrom into the shark's pit of the Leviathan match. Cut back and forth to clips of Merc holding the Wolrd title, and Maelstrom being eaten and dragged into the water.* One man's dream...achieved...*Fade to black, then fade into Mike Ragnal sneaking into the ring and nailing the Ragnalrok to the Daryl Dragon, then flipping the audience off, cutting rapidly back and forth between the old Mike and the "Elementalcidal" Mike until it stops at the image of Mike Ragnal standing behind Johnathan Doe and Andy Duke.* Another man's reality...shifted...MIKE: I've worked my DAMN ASS off for this promotion! And who gets the main event tonight?! Some Trish stalking psycho!! Now...*Cut to footage of Merc and Mike each wrestling different opponents, including the Cidal Squad attacking Merc, until the logo screen, as "Everything that Could Have Been" by Kittie plays in the background.* The heat finally breaks out in the ring...and nothing can save us from the destruction.
The New EWT World Heavyweight Champion, Merc, takes on the newly rechristened "Elementalcidal" Mike Ragnal...*** What started as a joke...*Cut to Momma holding a briefcase full of money, then storming out of the ring* Soon became a reality*Fade in to D'Zee winning the 2006 edition* Now we plan to do it again...
LIKE IT OR NOT!*For god knows what reason, we see the letters "XP" on the screen, which, if looked at the right way, is an emoticon sticking it's tongue out at you.* FEATURING THE RETURN OF...
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Post by Ultimo Chocula on Mar 14, 2007 1:53:49 GMT -5
The Fink: "The following tag team contest is scheduled for one fall!"
("You think you know me.........dooga dooga dooga da dooga dooga dooga............You think you know me...........")
The Fink: "Entering the ring first at a total combined weight of 467lbs, the team of Edge & Christian!"
(Down the ramp comes the two grinning, blond, Canadian, goofballs, Edge grinning bigger. They enter the ring and do the five second pose for all the fans with cameras, a couple fans have Instamatics. Rubes. Their music dies down as I'm not interested in fleshing out E & C's characters at the moment (I'm a jerk!) and "Love Will Keep Us Together" comes on.)
The Fink: "And their opponents, being led to the ring by PsyToni Tennille, at a total combined weight of 483lbs, the team of King Ultimo Choculon and The Daryl Dragon..............ULTIMO DRAGON!"
(Tennille comes out first doing the infamous "thumbs" dance as Daryl and UC come out on either side of her. UC flaps his cape and puffs out his chest with his hands on his hips like the Bat Commander (bonus points if you know who that is) as Daryl quietly bobs to himself with a dippy grin on his face. They walk down the ring to the cheers of the fans and they enter the ring hunky dory. Tennille raises the arms of both of her charges in a premature victory celebration as their theme music dies down and both men take off their elaborate capes (if you were in this faction you'd have a ginchy cape too! Join now!) The bell rings and it looks like Christian will be starting off with Daryl.
The two men lock up and Daryl lifts a knee up in Christian's stomach and sends him into the ropes, hitting a hip toss. Christian gets back up only to get a spin kick to the chest and he bends over giving Daryl a chance to give him a head lock, which he does. Christian shoves off only to get shoulder blocked down to the mat as Daryl comes off the ropes again as Christian hops back up and tries a hip toss of his own only Daryl flips out of it and chops Christian across the chest. Christian says "Owww!!!" and recoils from the chop. Daryl winds up Christians arm and tags out to Ultimo, who gets a nice cheer from the crowd, which is nice because a year ago he was a real dick head. UC comes in and kicks Christian's arm and takes over winding it up. Daryl leaves the ring to several corny cheers from Tennille.
UC gets Christian in an arm bar and walks around the ring with him. Christian grabs UC's arm for a reversal but UC flips over onto his back and shoves Christian down with his big purply boots. UC kips up as Christian gets up the boring way and UC bops him with a punch. UC sends Christian into the corner and runs in, diving in with a Scott Lost style shoulder ram............thing. Christian slumps down to the mat with the wind knocked out of him as UC grabs his leg and drags him over to the Dragon corner and UC tags Daryl in. Daryl enters and he grabs Christians other legs and a one and a two and bammo! Christian sings falsetto now.
Daryl flips Christian over onto his stomach and sticks his knee into his neck and puts Christian in an armbar. Christain struggles to get out of it but............it ain't happenin'. Edge finally loses his cool and comes into the ring, popping Daryl in the head and breaking the hold. Edge and Daryl trade blows as UC comes in and he and Christian do the same thing. Copy cats. Anyway, E& C give U & D two eye pokes and get the upperhand. E & C attempt to send U & D into each other but they have it scouted, do se do, and they each dropkick a Canadian. Christian hits the mat and rolls out to the ring apron but Daryl ain't havin' it. He grabs Christian and stands him up on the apron (Dragon's still in the ring, yo) and rams Christian's head into the buckle. Dragon then gives Christian a springboard dropkick, knocking Christian to the arena floor. Meanwhile UC was pounding the poo out of Edge and he sends Edge into Daryl, who back body drops Edge up and over the top rope and onto Christian. The two men help each other up but that won't do jack because in the ring UC is on his hands and knees as Daryl hits the ropes, jumps off of UC's back, and blasts E & C with the Suicidal Hat Dive. Daryl picks both men up as UC now hits the ropes and Daryl gets out of the way as UC once again sends both men down with the Cannonball Run. U & D both enter the ring and take a bow to the crowd for that incredible display of high spottery.
Edge rolls back into the ring (lucha tag rules here) and Daryl is right there with a series of kicks to the chest and stomach, ending it with a jumping spin kick that sends him down. Edge staggers up and Daryl gets him in the Torture Rack position and spins around real fast like then drops down to his knees, breaking Edge's back, making him hum-bell (I hate myself now for that joke). Dragon covers.
1.............. 2...................
Kick out. Dragon tags out to UC and they send Edge into the ropes. Daryl drop toe holds Edge down as UC hits a quick leg drop. UC then gets Edge in a Camel Clutch (HUM-BELL! Kill me) as Dragon hits the ropes and dropkicks Edge right in his teef. Dragon leaves the ring as UC covers.
1............. 2...................
Kick out. UC sends Edge into the ropes and hits him with a spine buster followed by three rapid elbows to the chest. UC then hits Edge with a Ghetto Blaster, stands up, raises his fist and sneers (Bad News Brown was one of my fave heels ever) and goes for the pin again.
1.................... 2.....................
Christian breaks it up. Christian turns to go back to his corner but UC dropkicks him out of the ring. Christian lands with a thud on the concrete as UC picks Edge up and sends him into the buckles. UC runs in but Edge gets his boot up and UC runs smack into it. Edge and Christian signal to one another and Christian grabs a chair. Christian gets up on the ring apron with the chair in hand as Edge picks UC up and attempts to run UC's head into the chair but.....................who am I fooling? Of course UC reverses and it's Edge that goes into the chair, Christian's shocked (SHOCKED!) that his little trick didn't work and UC knocks him off the apron for a third time. UC tags in Daryl and he immediately hits Edge with Do That To Me One More Time and bridges.
1........................ 2...................... 3!
The Fink: "Here are your winners......................ULTIMO DRAGON!"
(Tennille gets into the ring, places the crown on UC's head, and celebrates with her guys. After the usual post match "Ain't we great" blizz blazz they head back to the locker room.)
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Post by The Lach is very tired on Mar 14, 2007 3:51:00 GMT -5
*Sum Guy is standing in the EWT ring. A table is set up & there are several chairs set up around it.*
SG: I’m Sum Guy & I drive a Buick. I am here for the contract signing for the 10 man elimination tag match to be held at Dead Man Walking between Team Ratings & Team Spaz. Lets get the two team Captains out here to reveal their teams & get this contract signed!
*Keep On Liftin hits & the crowd boos Ratings as he appears at the top of the ramp looking cocky.*
SG: On his way to the ring, the captain of Team Ratings, from Palm Springs, CA, weighing in at 221 lbs, RATINGS!!
*As soon as Ratings gets into the ring Where’s The Party At hits & the crowd pops as Spaz appears. He is staring a hole right through Ratings.*
SG: And from Sydney, Australia, weighing in at 216 lbs he is the captain of Team Spaz, a 2 time OX Division Champion & a former EWT World Champion he is SPAZ!!
*Spaz rolls into the ring & the two men stare at each other from opposite sides of the table. They both sit down & pick up the mics.*
SG: Ok gentlemen, it’s time to make this matchup official. Lets put pen to paper.
R: Hold on there scrawny! I ain’t signing anything till I know what sort of decrepid hacks this washed up joke has got for his team!
S: Do you really think I would sign without knowing who you have too Ratings? Not that it matters coz I have assembled a team that will make you wet yourself you overcompensating windbag!
SG: Ok that’s fair, we will need all ten signatures to make it official. What do you say fans here in the EWT Arena? Should we get the teams out here?
*The crowd roars its approval.*
R: Ok the first-
S: Hold up there slick. How about you let the fans find out my first member? Seeing as they don’t really care about your bunch of degenerate cretins.
*The crowd roars again.*
S: Ok, play the music!
*Otherworld plays, the pyro erupts & the crowd pops.*
S: From Strasbourg, France, weighing in at 218 lbs, he is Mysth!
*Mysth makes his way to the ring as Spaz stands & applauds. Mysth enters the ring & sits down next to Spaz.*
R: That’s supposed to impress me? The French haven’t won a fight in 500 years! Lets get one of my team out here!
*With that Square Dance hits & Cassinova comes out looking cocky.*
R: From Los Angeles, CA, he weighs 225 lbs Cassinova!
*He slowly heads to the ring. He gets in, adjusts his hair & sits down next to Ratings.*
S: That pretty boy is too busy checking himself out to wrestle! Lets get a real man out here shall we!
*Hair of the Dog plays & Marcus Trunk appears. Ratings & Cassinova look a little worried as Trunk marches to the ring.*
S: From Detroit, MI, weighing in at 305 lbs he is a true powerhouse, Marcus Trunk!
*Trunk steps into the ring & stares down at Ratings & Cassinova. He then shakes hands with Spaz & Mysth & sits down.*
R: Oooooohhhhhhhh I’m so scared! Spaz got himself a big dumb monkey! You need more then just size to win here in EWT Spaz. Which is why my next team member is perfect for this matchup.
*Pomp & Circumstance plays & Tutor Tyreese & Principal Pain come out. Tyreese flips the crowd off & gestures that he is smarter then they are.*
R: With Principal Pain, now living in Dover, DE, weighing 226 lbs next to myself the best technical wrestler working in North America today Tutor Tyreese!
*Tyreese & Pain get in the ring & Pain makes a throat slashing motion to Spaz.*
S: No technician can match it with me Ratings, you know that! I know that, my team knows that & the crowd knows it!
*The crowd pop & a Team Spaz chant starts up.*
S: Ok next is a man who has only been here a short time but will be a huge star.
*Why Can’t We Be Friends plays & Aaron Chamblis steps out from behind the curtain. The crowd pops for the newcomer.*
S: From Cincinatti, OH, weighing in at 167 lbs he is a future champion here in EWT Aaron Chamblis!
*Aaron enters the ring & stares across at Ratings’ team.*
R: You have so few friends here in EWT you gotta drag green rookies into this? I knew you were unpopular but this is ridiculous! My next man will interest you quite a bit Trunk.
*Put Your Hands Where My Eyes Can See & now Rick Raskall appears in his carriage. Trunk jumps up & stares straight into his eyes.*
R: From, Los Angeles, CA, he weighs 209 lbs he is the talented half of his former tag team he is Rick Raskall!
*Raskall climbs out of the carriage & steps into the ring. He goes nose to nose with Trunk. Raskall then steps back & around to sit down with his team.*
S: I wouldn’t trust that snake Ratings he will probably jump you from behind right Marcus! Ok I have saved a special man for last. This man is one of the toughest guys in the world. I know coz I have wrestled him before. So have you Ratings.
*Remedy plays & the crowd goes nuts as Eddie Omega steps into the arena.*
S: From Washington D.C, now weighing 250 lbs he is a former OX Division Champion & one of the most ruthless competitors in wrestling Eddie Omega!
*Eddie gets in the ring & everyone is shocked to see Eddie & Spaz on the same team given the history between them.*
S: Eddie & I have had our differences but we both agree that you need to be taken down a peg or two Ratings!
R: Well I have found someone that thinks the same about you Spaz. Let find out who it is shall we?
*Tier plays & a shocked silence falls over the arena until Spyke appears & the crowd boos wildly. Spaz has a look of total disbelief on his face.*
R: From Stockholm Sweden, weighing 223 lbs he is a former Toolshed Champion & the best member of Generation Tech. He is Spyke Johannson!
S: Why Spyke? You & I were like brothers!
R: Shut your word hole! Lets sign the damn papers.
*Spaz signs the contract as do all of Team Spaz. Spaz then slides it to Ratings who signs with the rest of his team.*
SG: Ok now that the formalities are out of the way do the two captains have anything to say.
S: I do Sum. Ratings, you won’t win this war. I wont rest until I have my retribution!
SG: Ratings, anything to say?
R: Just this!
*Ratings then throws the contract at Spaz’s head. It hits him & Eddie dives across the table to get at Ratings but Spyke cuts him off. Mysth grabs Tyreese & levels both him & Pain. Cassinova goes after Chamblis with his chair but Chamblis ducks. The chair hits Sum Guy. Ratings has Spaz & looks to Powerbomb him through the table but Eddie stops him. The chaos has spilled out to the floor where Pain & Tyreese are double teaming Mysth. Sum is still down & now EWT security has rushed down but they are powerless to do much as these ten men look to obliterate each other. More security rushes to the ring & a cameraman is knocked over. As we cut to commercial all we see is the ceiling of the arena.*
CUT TO COMMERCIAL
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Post by SsnakeBite, the No1 Frenchman on Mar 14, 2007 5:32:04 GMT -5
*Mysth is in the street, about to get into the EWT arena. Suddenly, a bird comes next to him and starts flying around him. It appears to be a crow.*
Mysth : Well ? Mister the crow, as you can see, I ain' t no worm ! You' d better go cuz you' re not welcome inside...
*Mysth gets inside the arena, but the crow follows him. An attendant comes by.*
Attendant : Hey Mysth ! Is it your pet bird ? You know animals aren' t allowed inside the arena, right ?
Mysth : Actually it' s not mine, it just started following me and flying around me, I can' t get rid of it...
Attendant : We' ve got to make it go anyway !
*Suddenly, the bird pinches the attendant.*
Attendant : OUCH !! Hey ! Is this bird crazy or something ??
Mysth : Aw, come on, be a nice bird and go ! GO !
*Mysth and the attendant try to make it go by waving their arms, but this is useless and the bird keeps on flying around them.*
Mysth : Hey ! I have an idea !
Attendant : What ?
Mysth : Monsieur du Corbeau, si votre ramage se rapporte à votre plumage, vous êtes l' hôte des phénix de ce bois !
*The crow opens its beak wide, and something falls from it. Mysth picks it up.*
Mysth : A piece of paper... I' m pretty sure I know what' s on it.
Attendant : Ugh... it' s sea worn...
*Mysth unfolds the piece of paper.*
Mysth : Another black spot... but... this one isn' t like the other ones...
Attendant : Why ?
Mysth : There' s my name in the middle of it... now this is sure, all of this isn' t just an accident... and I' m pretty sure I know who' s responsible for all of this.
*The crow finally leaves the arena, and we cut to the next segment.*
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Post by respectmeordye3 on Mar 14, 2007 14:49:50 GMT -5
EWT comes back from a commercial break to find Bull Buccannan and Singapore Caine in the ring facing each other and ready to fight.
Bull grabs a mic:"Ya think your so tough cuz you got a big stick to hit people with don't ya?"
Bull spits at Caine and then continues...
"Well why don't we see who's better with a weapon,and make this a K.O. rules match?--if you gots the balls that is!"
Singapore gives a simple nod of agreement to the new stipulation for their match and tells the referee to go ahead and make it so.
The referee does just that and the bell rings starting the match.
Bull leaps outside of the rings reaches underneath it and pulls out two steel baseball bats which he proceeds to spin around as he shows off a bit for the crowd.
He then slips into the ring and charges full boar at Singapore Caine who simply sidesteps the raging opponent.
Bull spins around and swings one bat as hard as he can at Singapore Caine's head, But Singapore Caine ducks the blow and then yanks the bat out of Bull's hand and tosses it outside the ring.
Bull is now left with one last steel bat.
In an extreme rage, Bull raises the bat over his head and strikes downward at Singapore Caine--but Singapore Caine again steps aside and the bat instead strikes the top rope,bounces back and cracks Bull in the face K.O.-ing him right away!
Singapore Caine has won!
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Post by teamireland on Mar 14, 2007 17:06:22 GMT -5
"Come get on the HOOOOOOOOO TRAIN!" *The Godfather makes his way out accompanied by Hos of all shapes & sizes; all scantily clad, of course. He dances his way down to the ring.* David Penzer: The following contest is scheduled for one fall. Introducing first, from the Red Light District, weighing in at 265lbs, THE... GODFATHER! *GF gets in the ring & continues to boogie with his hos, some of them dancing with a slightly flustered David Penzer. He requests a mic & Penzer obliges.* Godfather: It's time... once again... for everybody... to get aboard the... HOOOOOOOOO TRAIN! Now roll a fatty for this Pimp Daddy! Light it up for the Godfather & say... Audience: PIMPIN' AIN'T EASY! Godfather: You damn right! *Dropkick Murphys' I'm Shipping Up To Boston starts & Shane Malone & Coach O'Hare enter to the boos of the fans.* Penzer: And his opponent, being accompanied by Coach O'Hare, from Galway, Ireland, weighing in at 297lbs, "The Celtic Giant"... SHANE... MALONE! *Malone wastes little time & dashes to the ring, clobbering the Godfather as the Hos exit hurriedly. O'Hare leers at the Hos in way so creepy that it makes my skin crawl just typing about it. Eeeew! So, Shane & the Godfather be clubberin'. Shane whips GF into the ropes & catches him on his return with a BIG Spinebuster! Shane goes for a pin...* 1... 2... KICKOUT! *Godfather gets to his feet again & rallies back at Malone. He lands a few big shots on Shane then whips him to a corner. Godfather starts building up some steam... He runs at Malone for the Ho Train. Shane dodges & Godfather runs chest first into the turnbuckle. Shane locks GF up for the "Dragon Slayer", but GF escapes it. GF nails Shane with a Mafia Kick. Malone is staggered a little bit, but rallies to hit GF with a big Lariat! Malone goes for a pin again...* 1... 2... *The pin is broken up by... THE MEAN STREET POSSE?* DING-DING-DING! O'Hare: What the hell is going on, what are you idiots doing? Pete Gas: We know we have a title match against your guys so we figured we'd get a few shots in now before we... O'Hare: You moron! Shane isn't even one of the Tag-Team Champions! *Pete Gas slaps Joey Abs on the arm, like it's his fault. At that, Abs & Gas are attacked from behind by Sean McCann & Aidan Donnelly. Both MSP members are nailed with title belts.* DING-DING-DING! O'Hare: We're havin' this Tag-Team title match RIGHT NOW! *Sean & Aidan make covers on Gas & Abs, respectively. The ref counts.* 1... 2... 3! DING-DING-DING! *"I'm Shipping Up To Boston" plays again.* Penzer: Here are your winners & STILL EWT World Tag-Team Champions... TEAM IRELAND! *The team yuk it up heartily before heading on backstage to enjoy a few nice cool tins of Guinness!*
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Post by Redface: Dispenser of Justice on Mar 14, 2007 18:31:59 GMT -5
*Everything is rather quiet in the EWT Arena. The Fans are quietly awaiting the next match when strange music starts playing. "This Mortal Soil" by Mastodon begins playing. The Fans are wondering if this is the Debut of a new EWT Talent, when Redface Rodgers appears at the top of the ramp with two chairs and a mic in hand. The Crowd pops huge for him as he make his way down to the ring. He enters the ring and sets up the two chairs. He then begins to speak into the mic. The Music Stops* Redface:...Well, it seems I've been cheated out of my rematch for the toolshed title... *Half of the Crowd agrees, the other half boos loudly. The Camera pans across the vast crowd. One of the Fans is hold a sign that reads "DOWN WITH MINIPAX! LONG LIVE RODGERS!" another with a sign that reads "RODGERS WAS ROBBED". The camera zooms in on a fan with a sign that reads "JZBADBLOOD 4 TOOLSHED CHAMPION PRESIDENT 2007".* Redface: I've got a lot on my plate right now. I gotta match coming up, I gotta...talk to some people, I definitely have to deal with that ratfink Indigo, but right now, I have a serious bone to pick... *The Toomitron flickers to life as footage from March 4th, 2007 begins playing. The footage is of Rogers about to put the Razor's Edge on Indigo, only to be thwarted by Jason Jupiter. The Crowd reacts negatively to this video as Rodgers watches with rage in his eyes.* Redface: You see that? THAT'S ME BEING CHEATED! BLACK AND WHITE, THERE IT IS! I request that that...that Little **BLEEP** come out here and meet me face to face like a man, not like a coward, which is how he did me at March 4th! So get your puny ass down here, Jupiter! *Silence for a while. Then Jupiter appears on the Toomitron, laughing* Jupiter: Rodgers, you look like such a joke right now. It's gold, man. It's people like you, with your petty hatred and savagery that make me laugh. Why, it reminds me of-- Redface: Can't face me like a man, Jupiter? What's the matter? You don't have a spine? or any balls? Jupiter: You know what? I think you should be nice to me. I've been helping my cousin Jack train, and I took time out of my schedule JUST to talk to you. You should be happy I'm even here, wasting my time with a pathetic-- Redface: I SAID I WANTED TO TALK TO YOU IN PERSON. You must be to much of a puss to come down and face me like a man. You must have picked that up from the tramp you run with... The Crowd: OOOOOOOOOOH SNAP! Jupiter: If I was Thunder, I would've launched through the *BLEEP*in' screen there. Still, I've got half the mind to go out there and kick your ass for that pathetic remark, you bloated whale! Redface: The Other half must be telling you to stay put, cuz you know I'd beat you into a submission. Jupiter: WHAT THE HELL DO YOU WANT?! Why did you pull me out of here?! Redface: I WANNA KNOW WHY YOU AND THUNDER AND TERINA ARE RUNNIN' WITH MINIPAX! *Jupiter shrugs and rolls his eyes. Redface continues.* Redface: I've seen you in action, Jupiter. You and your tag partner. You guys are great! You, Thunder and Terina don't need align yourselves with scum like Chris Indigo and Joe One. I wanna know why'd you do it? What made you do it? *Jupiter begins laughing hysterically* Redface: WHAT'S SO FUNNY. Jupiter: Because we've made it obvious, dumbass. We're in Minipax because only the strong survive, and right now, it's lookin' like Minipax IS made nothing but the strong! *Suddenly, Redface is assulted from behind by Jimmy Thunder and Chris Indigo, who begin mercilessly beating on Redface with the two chairs he had brought into the ring. Indigo Grabs Rodgers and Hits the Visions of Indigo on him, leaving him lifeless in the middle of the ring. Indigo and Thunder high-five each other and trash talk the fallen hardcore star as Jupiter continues to look on with a smile on his face. Terina and Jack walk up into the camera's view.* Terina: Is this over, already? Did you guys deal with him? *Thunder and Indigo both nod.* Jack: Good. Glad to see we can FINALLY get back to training. Yeesh. Jason: And it ain't over, Redface. Your pain isn't NEARLY over! *All of the visible Minipax members laugh, as the camera fades to black*
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Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
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Post by Deleted on Mar 14, 2007 21:19:44 GMT -5
*The camera cuts to the locker room of Aaron Chamblis, the young man sitting in a folding chair. It seems to have a dent in it. With him is Sum Guy, also sitting in a chair.*
Sum: Hello, I'm Sum Guy, and I feel like I've been hit by a train. I'm here with one of EWT's most engimatic porspects, Aaron Chamblis. How is it going, Aaron?
Aaron: Good, and thanks for asking.
Sum: So, Aaron, people are wondering, how did an inexperienced man like you get into the elimination match at Dead Man Walking?
Aaron: Well, I was doing nothing more than working out, when all of a sudden, Spaz comes up to me and makes me an offer. He said that "You're a dark horse. Nobody's scouted you, nobody expects you in." He seemed interested in my talent, too, but why he wanted me to get into this war I have no idea.
Sum: A war?
Aaron: Well sure. I mean, as soon as a little bit of a squabble takes place, all hell breaks loose, and Cassinova is rushing at me with a chair. I duck, and not long after, I'm sitting in the very same chair that impacted on your head.
Sum*rubbing head*: Yeah, I can tell.
Aaron: I'm not in this to prove a point, I'm not in this to kill someone, I want a GOOD match where I can show my ability for what it's worth. Even if that's not the most popular philosophy out there nowadays, it's the do that I do.
Sum: I see.
Aaron: It's a pity. In the indies, it's all about wrestling a good match, doing crazy-ass moves, and having fun for what it's worth. Here? Everyone is taking it so personally. Look at TJT. Thunder is all about seeing himself as a god, Jupiter is always dissing somebody, and Terina is always angry about how someone thinks of her. WHy can't they get along with everyone else? And it's not just them, it's most of the roster. Tell ya what, I WILL prove something come Dead Man Walking.
Sum: What's that?
Aaron: At Dead Man Walking, I will show everyone in that match exactly HOW you wrestle: with heart, sportsmanship, and honed skills. Not brutality or hatred. That's a major no-no. Alright, I'm going out for a bite to eat. I'll catch up to you later, Sum.
*Aaron leaves.*
Sum: I'm Sum Guy, and that might be the first time in a long time I haven't gotten killed. Phew.
*As Sum Guy sighs in relief, the camera fades out.*
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Ass Dan
King Koopa
Curious about extra lines
Have you seen me?
Posts: 12,259
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Post by Ass Dan on Mar 14, 2007 23:12:56 GMT -5
The sounds of Klepacki's 'Hell March' plays as the crowd boos One.
WE WANT WAR! WAKE UP!
Announcer: The following contest is scheduled for one fall. Introducing first, from Airstrip One, weighing in at 234 lbs., Joe One!
The crowd gives major heat to One.
Announcer: And, already in the ring, weighing in at 326 lbs., Kane!
The crowd cheers Kane as he does his arm thingy. The referree checks both men and calls for the bell.
*ding ding ding*
Kane charges at One, but One ducks and hits a forearm to Kane before delivering a bulldog. One goes for the quick cover!
1!
And kickout at 1. One tries to lock on the sleeper hold, but Kane sneaks out and lands an elbow on One. Kane takes the offensive with a standing sidekick to the face. Kane gives a few punches to the face before One musters enough energy for a lariat. As Kane gets up, One hits a neckbreaker on Kane. One quickly locks on the sleeper hold as Kane writers in pain. Kane taps after not too long.
*ding ding ding*
Announcer: Here is your winner, Joe One!
One’s hand gets raised as he gives the ‘V’ sign with his arms. He returns to the back as we…
*CUT TO COMMERCIAL*
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Post by dorf on Mar 14, 2007 23:45:48 GMT -5
*The EWT camera zooms to the back where dorf has the mic*
Dorf: Greetings, EWT soothsayers....the ides of March is upon us. Of course this how Caesar got killed and said the famous words...."Et tu, Bruti?"
*just then, ape love enters*
Ape: OWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!!!!1 EAT TURKEY.....and cheese! *bits into a turkey sandwich in front of the camera and melted cheese oozes out*
that's why i'm not here, brother dorf....i'm here for what you mentioned about the ides of march....what a shameful day....stuff was supposed to happen and then caesar just died...by a bunch of brutes....hehehe....by a bunch of brutes, i crack me up sometimes...
*dorf stares at him pissed*
Dorf: LOOK, I don't know why you keep bothering me, keep pleading with your nicities, and worst of all the fact that a cheese sandwich has been desecrated for life with that piece of chicken s*** named turkey.
I still think you are a
DIRTY
DISGUSTING
BRUTAL
BOTTOM-FEEDING
TRASH-BAG
idiot, son of a b*** who loves flinging poo.
Ape: OWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!
brother dorf, there's nothing wrong with *gets into psychoapeguy character* poopppppp *ends character, returns to ape love*
*some tense music plays in the background*
Dorf: DUDE! You are freaking me out to the point of pissing me off even more. TOMORROW NIGHT...we face the Hardy Boyz and if you mess me up once in our match, it'll be your head....just like what happened to Caesar's! Because somebody will get their.....
Ape: TURKEYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!
*ape smiles as he takes another bite out of the Turkey & Cheese Sandwich as dorf stares at him, ready to throw a fist, but slams the mic down and storms off and punched Dull Grisham down. ape love smilingly nods as the camera fades to commerical.*
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Post by xombiehiphop on Mar 15, 2007 10:22:27 GMT -5
-The scene opens with Too Cool and Rikishi just entering the ring, performing some hip-hop styled dance moves as the crowd looks on..-
Announcer: Now entering the ring..Too Cool and Rikishi!
-The camera cuts to our two announcers for this contest, JR and The King-
JR: Too Cool and Rikishi, entertaining the audience as we get ready to see some six man action.
..Suppose you were to die tonight? What would you say?
-The Draugr appear on the stage amidst all the dimming lights. The three members are all wearing very realistic masks, made to represent their three opponents for the night. The fleshy "skin" is baggy and stretched, the mouths pulled open, and were the eyes should be are just dark slits..-
Announcer: ..And their opponents..Corpse, Wraith and Ghost Face..The Draugr!
King: Oook..that's pretty creepy.. *shivering*
JR: Well, the game is one half physical and one half mental. Something like that can go a long way to unhinge your opponents..
King: Speaking of which, did you see that these three seem to have kidnapped some poor girl? ..Or..what I guess is a girl!
JR: That's about the way you get your dates, isn't it King?
King: That's real funny coming from someone who gets an orgasm from a pack of Skittles..
JR: OH GAWD, THERE FRUITY.
-The Draugr enter the ring and stare down their opponents, who look somewhat freaked out by the masks their wearing. The masks are slowly removed and the bell rings, Grandmaster Sexay and Ghost Face starting the match off. Grandmaster shakes off what he had seen and steps in front of Ghost Face, performing a few dance moves. Afterwards, Sexay invites Ghost to participate but he only receives a stiff smack to the face. As Grandmaster recoils backwards, Ghost Face rushes him from behind, laying in rights and lefts..-
JR: Apparently, The Draugr aren't much for dancing..
King: Shocker of the year!
-Ghost Face whips Sexay into the ropes and takes him down with a Hip Toss. When Sexay gets to his feet and charges forward, he's dropped again with Drop Toe Hold. Ghost Face locks in a Camel Clutch and Corpse enters through the middle ropes..getting a running start before placing two boots into The Grandmaster's face. Ghost Face makes the official tag to Corpse who takes Sexay to the mat with a Snap Suplex. He goes for a second attempt, but Sexay lands behind him. Corpse spins around just in time to catch a Drop Kick to the face. Scotty is tagged into the match..
Scotty nails Corpse with a few right hands before running off the ropes and attempting a Wheel Barrel..however Corpse flops backwards and Scotty goes crashing onto the back of his neck. Corpse makes another tag to Ghost Face who springboards onto ropes and blasts Scotty with a Missle Drop Kick. He stomps the master of The Worm a few times in the stomach before making another quick tag to Corpse. Corpse comes off the top rope onto the downed Scotty with a Moonsault that further flattens him into the mat. The quick tags keep coming as Ghost Face is the legal man again..he leaps to the top to inflict further punishment onto Scotty with a corkscrew Moonsault..but Scotty narrowly rolls away!-
JR: Scotty desperately needs to make a tag if he wants this match to continue!
King: You know The Draugr aren't looking to lose this one with such a big upcoming match.
JR: That's right, their going to be facing The Wrestle Posse and TJT in a Falls Count Anywhere Tornado Tag Finisher Match.
King: Trying saying THAT in one breath!
JR: These three new, young teams have a very bright future ahead..but this match might take a few years off.
King: Yeah, all those teams have a bright future. ..Well..ya know..maybe not The Wrestle Posse!
-Scotty makes the tag to the biggest man in the match, Rikishi. He drops Ghost Face with a punch and does the same to Corpse as he enters the ring. As Ghost Face rises, Rikishi hits him with a flapjack, his blond dreadlocks flopping about as he hits the mat. Corpse is hit with a well timed Super Kick from the Phat Man, sending a wad of spit into the third row. The Samoan continues his ways, whipping both Draugr members into the same corner. He rushes in, looking for a charging Butt Splash, but both men are able to roll away at the last moment. Ghost Face tags the fresh Wraith who enters the ring and promptly sends Rikishi crashing downwards with a Diving Shoulder tackle. As Rikishi stumbles to his feet, Wraith is able to take the big man down with a ring shaking Spine Buster. Wraith scales to the top rope and drives an a Diving Elbow into 'Kishi's chest and hooks a leg..
..One..
..Two..
..Scotty interrupts with a boot to the head! The other four participants enter the ring and begin to brawl amongst each other. Grandmaster ducks a punch from Ghost Face and Clotheslines him over the top, following after him. Meanwhile, Scotty scores with a Bulldog on Corpse and stands over his fallen body with arms stretched out..
King: We're gonna see it it, JR! The WORM!
Crowd: W!
O!
R! .....
-The last letter is never completed as Wraith booted Scotty in the gut in mid-hop and followed through with an Implant DDT. Scotty is roughly dumped to the outside by the green haired freak while Ghost Face slams Sexay into the ropes on the outside. Corpse climbs to a turnbuckle as Ghost Face soon climbs to an opposite one. Rikishi, still laying prone in the middle of the ring, is destroyed with a simultaneous Leg Drop/Splash combo. The Road To Nowhere. Wraith hooks the leg..
..One..
..Two..
..Three!-
King: If The Draugr are able to do the same at Dead Man Walking, they'll have knocked off TJT and The Wrestle Posse and possibly line them selves up for a Tag Title shot!
-The Draugr survey the damage they caused for a few moments before eventually exiting the ring to the sound of Alice In Chains' "We Die Young"-
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Post by The Bad Man on Mar 15, 2007 14:33:16 GMT -5
We return from the commercial break as some heavy metal music is playing and out from behind the curtain walk the Headbangers
THE FINK: Introducing first ... hailing from Seattle, WA ... weighing in at 485lbs ... Mosh and Thrasher ... The Headbangers!
The crowd cheers as the two goofballs head to the ring, they slide in bounce off opposite ropes and do there back to back mosh jump. The crowd eats up this nostalgia until the music stops.
THE FINK: There opponents ...
From the speakers loud organ music can be heard, It is Praeludium in D Minor by Johann Pachelbel. The crowd begins to jeer as the dinge reaches almost unbearable loudness.
THE FINK: Hailing from Bad Axe, Michigan ... and weighing in at a total combined weight of 831lbs .... they are Big and Bad!
The lights flicker red and green as from under the curtain walks Mr. Big and Mr. Bad much to the displeasure of the crowd. Mr. Bad leads the way trying to scamper around Big like a deranged puppy dog, but instead gives the impression of a waddling walrus about to carve someon's head open. Mr. Big follows behind a serious look on his face hidden beneath his dark sunglasses. They both walk up the ring steps and enter the ring. The Headbangers look concerned at the sheer size of there opponents.
JOSH MATTHEWS: Hello everyone I'm Josh Matthews and alongside me today for this exciting match is the man in the know Johnny Polo.
JOHNNY POLO: Well thanks Josh.
JM: Well Polo, this match is about to get underway, but we must remember that this is the debut of Big and Bad, what can you tell us about them?
JP: What can I tell you? I can tell you this, both of these men are big and dangerous. There is no fear, concern or mercy when you face these two behemoths. Mainly because they are the ones who will be creating as much terror, pain and suffering as possible on there opponents!
Mosh and Thrasher have a game of stone, paper, scissors to decide who goes first for there team Mosh wins and high fives. Meanwhile Mr. Bad will be starting for Big and Bad. The Bell Rings
Mosh and Mr. Bad tie up and Mr. Bad soon uses his girth to overpower Mosh and throws him into the ropes. Mosh comes back at full steam with a shoulder block which has no effect. Mr. Bad pounces forward his blubber wobbling in respomce but Mosh ducks out of the way of the lunge and throws a couple of punches. Mr. Bad holds his head as Mosh sizes up fro another punch, but then Mr. Bad grabs the arm and flings him over his immense shoulders smacking him against the mat.
JM: Did you see that Polo, Mr.Bad just nailed Mosh with a overhead Judo throw!
JP: He seems to be full of surprises.
Mr. Bad measures Mosh and drops an elbow which finds the mark and becomes a cover.
1,2 ...
Thrasher runs in and breaks up the pin. Mr. Bad unimpressed goes to work on Mosh with a series of rights to the skull. Hethen lifts him up by the neck and flingshim back to the canvas hard. Mr. Bad taps his head as if to check he's still working adn then just falls like a treee crushing Mosh beneath his bulk.
1,2 ...
Thrasher again breaks up the pinfall, but Mosh is barely breathing after 420lbs fell on him. Mr. Bad ignoring Thrasher grabs Mosh by the head and starts and flings him to his own corner. Mosh tags out as does Mr. Bad.
The crowd begins to chant for the Headbangers
Mr. Big crunches his knuckles and enters the ring his sunglasses still on, Thrasher runs over and peppers him with a few right adn the tries an irish whip. Mr. Big is far too heavy and tall to be moved like this and flings Thrasher the other way right over the top rope and to the floor! Thrasher smacks the outside and is flat out. Mr. Big turns towards Mosh who is barely standing on the apron and gives him a throat slitting gesture, Mosh tries to get at Big but the referee blocks him off. Witht he referee now distracted Mr. Bad jumps down from the apron and waddles along to Trhasher like an obese marshmallow man. thasher who was coming around looks up to find the grotesque form of Mr. Bad standing over him. Mr. Bad shrieking like an elephant after eating a bucket of Jalpeno Peppers uses both hands and chops thrasher across the neck. Thrasher clutches his bruised windpipe but can do nothing as Mr. Bad brings him between his legs and then lifts him up into a piledriver position.
The crowd begins to yell loudly to get the referee to turn around, but he does not as Mr. Big is still taunting Mosh
Mr. Bad a sick twisted look across his face holds Thrasher with one hand, the other hand reaches into his long pants and pulls out a small hammer.
JM: Good grief he wouldn't?
JP: He would .. ooh that is not nice.
Mr. Bad has nailed Thrasher with the piledriver but at the same time with his free hand has smashed the hammer right between Thrasher's legs. Two Times the Pain!! Mr. Bad hides the hammer away and hurls Thrasher back in the ring. Mr. Big walks over calmly and puts a foot on thrasher's chest for the cover. Mosh enters the ring to try and stop this but is cut off by the surprisingly nimble Mr. Bad who runs right into him.
1,2,3.
the Bell Rings
THE FINK: Your winners Big and Bad!!
The crowd boos and jeers loudly as Big and Bad pick up the win here. Mr. Bad however is not finshed with Mosh and grabs him by the throat lifting him up. He then applies a bear hug! But not any ordinary bear hug as his arms surround Mosh's entire body and lock the arms inside.
JM: How strong is this Mr. Bad? Normally the wrestlers wants to get his arms in between the bear hug to break the hold but Mr. Bad has applied it with the arms inside anyway. Look at that, Mosh can't move at all, I think he's turning blue!
JP: It's a rare move Josh, but I have seen it. Known in distant wrestling lands as the Bayanhongor Fracture Clasp originally a speciality to mongolian strong men. It would appear it has now reache us here in EWT. It is called the fracture clasp as if applied correctly it can break a mans arms.
After about a minute Mr. Bad drops mosh to the canvas with a sneer, he turns to Big and points to the back. the two huge men walk to the back, the largest tag team in EWT history has just made a huge impact as they have effortlessly beaten the Headbangers.
(Fade out to commercial for the new Time & Power: Toomi E. Dangerously DVD)
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Post by teamireland on Mar 15, 2007 15:17:57 GMT -5
*Team Ireland are hanging out & chatting backstage, Liam is not with them.* Aidan: Man, those guys were [makes finger quotes]"tough". Almost as hard to beat as Raskall & Trunk. *The Irish quartet laugh. They are approached by Leticia Cline, y'know, that girl from TNA.* Leticia: Coach O'Hare, Aidan, Sean, do you have anything to say about your opponents for Dead Man Walking, Dorf & Ape Love? O'Hare: As a matter of fact, yeah, we do. We were just discussing Raskall & trunk there & just look at those guys now. They, like every other team we've faced, have faded away! Where are The Nyrds now? What became of The Sunshine Squad? And now Raskall & Trunk! We don't just beat these lads, we decomission them entirely! There's not a team in EWT that we can't topple. There's not an INDIVIDUAL in the locker-room that we can't beat! Dorf & Ape Love will suffer the same fate as every other team that sought to challenge the greatest champions to ever grace EWT! We've proven time & time again that YOU WILL NEVER BEAT THE IRISH! And pretty soon, that pair of arseholes will know all about it! *Team Ireland leave.* Leticia: Now back to the ring for our next match... or maybe not...
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Post by brokenrose on Mar 15, 2007 21:19:07 GMT -5
*The camera opens to ECW's Rebecca.* Rebecca: Hell-low....this....is..Roh...bec...ah....and......now.....Jew....dee..... *BR walks into the camera and just stares at Rebecca.* Rebecca: What....are.....your...............thoughts.........on.............. *click* *Juri reaches behind Rebecca's back and flips a switch. Immediately Rebecca goes offline and stumps forward. Juri pulls the mic out of her hand.* BR: I will be the first to say that I have a hair trigger nerve and I let anything & everything get to me. That being said... It's no surprise that I haven't seen either Thunder or Jupiter anywhere near me after what each of them did at March 4th. Jupiter is fully aware of just how unforgiving I am but Thunder hasn't been my mercy yet. When the time comes for me to get revenge on you for feeling me up and costing me a victory, I'll make sure to make it exceedingly long and exceedingly painful for you. *She moves out of frame, to right of the prone Rebecca.* BR: It's really no surprise that the only one with guts on TJT is Terina. While she is making it known that she wants to wrestle, her boyfriends are too busy drinking and fighting with nobodies than actually trying to make it to the top. But does she have the will to win, no matter the cost? *Juri turns and pulls up her shirt to show her scar covered back. She talks over her shoulder.* BR: Disgusted, Terina? You are so freely able to mock my scars and say that I fear them? I don't fear them, I LOVE THEM! Ever scar tells a story about how hard and just how far I will willing to go to win a match. So, at Dead Man Walking... In a Submission match... Your will will be tested. *She pulls her shirt back down and turns back to the camera.* BR: Watch my match carefully, Sweetie. I'll show you just how well I can make a true warrior tap. *The camera fades into commercial.* [SUPER SPECIAL AWESOME CHOCOLATELY COMMERCIAL BREAK] *The camera pan across the EWT crowd, suddenly some music starts.* * “Whatever” By Our Lady Peace begins to play. * *The crowd gives a decent pop to Chris Benoit as he explodes from out of the curtain with arms raised high in the air. He walks from one side of the stage to the other, beating his chest, before coming to the center and raising his arms as he walks down the ramp.* Finkel: Making his way to the ring... From Edmonton, Alberta... Weighting in at 220 lbs... Chris BEN-OIT! *He climbs the stairs and enters in his usual & quick way. He raises his arms from one side of the ring to the other. He begins to wring his hands together as he waits for his opponent. His music ends.* Finkel: And his opponent... * “Rose” by Anna Tsuchiya plays. * *The crowd pops for Broken Rose of EWT as she walks through the crowd in a pathway to the ring; giving high fives to fans. As she continues her trek an old Wrestle Posse friend, Bubba Jones, tries to pull her vest off in a non-nonsensical attempt as she walks by. Within seconds, Bubba is on the ground with a tooth missing.* Finkel: Now residing in Osaka, Japan... Weighting in at 142 lbs.... BR Juri Sadamoto! *She hops over the barricade and rolls into the ring, then proceeds to do her little routine of stretching her arms behind her back. Her music ends and the bell rings.* Cole: This looks to be a good match, wouldn't you say partner? JBL: Stop calling me partner damnit! But yes, it does look like a good match. But I'm not sold on the fact that Juri thinks she can win by submission. Cole: Well, she just may pull an upset. JBL: And maybe pigs can fly too. *BR and Benoit circle each other before locking up. Although BR is out matched in strength against Benoit, she gets the upper hand and locks in a Wristlock behind Benoit's back. As Benoit turns to escape, Sadamoto turns with him which prevents him from escaping. After a bit of this, Benoit drops straight down and Snapmares BR over his shoulder into a sitting position. He quickly locks in a Rear Naked Choke on BR, attempting to really grind it in. BR attempts to squirm out of the hold, mostly by trying to push his arms off her head. After a bit, she has loosen his grip just enough to fall to her back while sending a lone kick to his temple. Benoit falls to a sitting position, stunned, while Juri stands and hits a Dropkick to his face. She grabs the same arm that she was working on before then proceeds to torque it. She then quickly rolls Benoit over and looks in a Hammerlock on the same left arm. She then adds more pressure by adding a Bridge to the Hammerlock. Benoit struggles to free himself and, after no success, begins to hit BR's right leg with his free arm. After a few hard shots, BR's leg buckles and Benoit is freed from the harsh maneuver.* JBL: Great work by Benoit by freeing himself there. Cole: Before he escaped, I thought that Juri may just have had him there. JBL: And that's why you would fail as a wrestler, Cole, because you fail to see just how many possible ways you can break from an “unescapable” hold. *Both quickly make it to their feet, BR looks to be having trouble with her right leg. Benoit goes for a Knife Edge Chop and Sadamoto ducks. She goes for a Chop of her own, only to have it ducked as well. Benoit attempts another Chop but is blocked by BR. She goes for another Chop but misses while Benoit goes behind her. As she turns to meet him, he gives her a vicious Chop to the chest area. As she gasps for air, he lays another one on her. He continues this until he has her against a turnbuckle. He goes for another but she blocks and reacts with a Chop of her own, directed at his face. As an almost sense of payback, she starts alternately Chopping his face and chest. Yet, she is getting too over zealous and opens herself for a quick shot to the abdomen. Benoit quickly reaches around her small frame before throwing her to the mat in a Gutwrench Suplex.* Cole: Oh my! JBL: How could BR make such a mistake? That's the kind of thing a rookie does! Cole: Perhaps it's just that she's focused on her match with Terina at Dead Man Walking? JBL: Too focused maybe. If she doesn't get her mind in the game now, Benoit just may soften up Juri too much for her to be successful against Terina. *Benoit grabs BR's right leg. He then kicks it a few times, then he stretches it leg while torquing it. BR scrambles to make it to the ropes but to no avail. And even worse for BR: Benoit lifts up her other leg, steps between them, and effortlessly turns her over into a painfully Sharpshooter. She franticly tries to gain some ground on the ropes but Benoit remains vigilant in holding it on.* Cole: OH MY! OH MY! BENOIT HAS LOCKED IN THE SHARPSHOOTER! JBL: This could be it! That simple mistake just may cost Juri the match! *She pushes herself up by her arms, and while under great strain, walks on her hands to the ropes. After being in arms length of the ropes, her arms give out and she falls in a heap. Benoit begins to drag her away but she quickly recovers and grabs the ropes. The referee begins the count.* 1! 2! 3! *Benoit lets out and Juri immediately tries to protect her right knee from further damage. As Benoit inches closer to her, she pulls his tights forward to send him out to the ringside. She pulls herself up to her feet with much help from the ropes and walks gingerly to where Benoit is re-entering the ring. He runs towards her, to attempt a Cross Block, but she gives him a Drop Toe Hold for his troubles. She quickly floats over, as he turns to lay on his stomach, to lock in an Armbar on his left arm. He looks for the ropes but he's just slightly too far from them to do any good. She goes for the win by clamping her legs around his arm too.* JBL: Again, with the submission... That's why you never try to win a certain way. Cole: Why's that, John? JBL: Because then you get too side tracked and it just may cost you the match. *Just has it looks like Benoit is about to tap, he lifts his right side off the mat and forces Juri into a pin position while still locking in the hold. The referee begins to count as Juri is just realising what is going on and tries to let go of the hold.* 1! 2! 3! *The ring bell sounds as Finkel announces Benoit as the winner, the crowd applauds for a good show, and Benoit celebrates his victory. All the while, Juri sits in shock on the mat. She rolls out of the ring and gingerly walks to the back. Knowing that her one chance to psyche out Terina just blew up in her face. * Cole: It's a long way to the back for one, Juri Sadamoto. JBL: It's stupid Cole, very stupid. She tried so hard to get a submission victory that it not only cost her the match but perhaps her match with Terina as well. Cole: Yea, John. It looks like she may have injured that right knee. JBL: And no doubt, Terina will spot that then use it to her advantage. *Fade to commercial.*
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