|
Post by teamireland on Oct 7, 2007 16:17:41 GMT -5
*Brad Rhenigans & Ken Patera, collectively known as The Olympians, wait in the ring when the opening strains of "I'm Shipping Up To Boston" start up. The fans give a mild cheer for Team Ireland. As the team walk out at the upbeat of the song, they ignore the fans. Aidan stands with a Tricolour over his head, looking down, Sean wears a silver waistcoat to match his pants & a pair of shades, O'Hare is clad in jeans, a Team Ireland shirt with a leather jacket worn over it & a tweed flat-cap; as always, he carries his Tricolour wrapped Hurley over his shoulder. The team advance down the ramp; Aidan clutching the corners of the Tricolour in his hands, yet keeping it over his head.*
"TG" Toni Garcya: And their opponents, being accompanied by Coach O'Hare, weighing in at a total combined weight of 396lbs proudly representing their home country of Ireland, "The Don Juan of Donegal" Sean McCann & Captain Aidan Donnelly... TEAM IRELAND!
*Team Ireland's Green, White & Gold pyro explodes at the top of the ramp as O'Hare hoists the Hurley high, Sean raises his arms over his head & Aidan holds his arms out, displaying the Tricolour behind his head (like Kurt Angle does). Aidan then brings the Tricolour down around his shoulders before continuing on to the ring. Once inside, Aidan climbs to the top rope & displays the flag once again. Sean removes his waistcoat & tosses it out to some desperate fangirls, then he slips his shades off & winks at the women in the audience. O'Hare stands in the middle of the ring waving the Tricolour as "I'm Shipping Up To Boston" fades out...*
DING-DING!
*The Olympians attempt to attack from behind, but Aidan leaps backwards & lands on Patera with a Moonsault. Sean jumps off & manages to Double Stomp Rhenigans in the back of the head.*
Nick Russ: The Olympians are NOT off to a very strong start against Team Ireland here tonight, Jerome.
Jerome "The Lord" East: That's an understatement, Nick. Team Ireland came her tonight ready for a fight. They've been off course lately, but it looks as though they're ready to get back into the swing of things tonight. Hey, look who's about to join us...
*Coach O'Hare sits down next to East & puts on a headset.*
O'Hare: Didja see that? Nobody gets the drop on Team Ireland! We may have ballsed up last week, but now we're re-focussed, re-organized & ready to get back to business.
Russ: Speaking of which, Coach, what do you make of Liam O'Neill's secret?
O'Hare: Oh, that's easy. Liam O'Neill is "Save_US.222"!
East: Really?
O'Hare: Absolutely! I read it on the internet!
*In the ring, meanwhile, the official has managed to get things back under control. However, unfortunately for Sean McCann, he's in there against Ken Patera. Patera Gorilla Presses Sean over his head & really makes a show of it, acting as though he'll throw him out of the ring. But Sean manages to grab a hold of Patera's arm & manages to work around to a Short Arm Scissors.*
Russ: That's definitely a different method of attack being employed by Sean McCann. Not often we see him go for a submission hold like that.
*Sean's attempts to get Patera to give up are short lived as the *ac-hem* "World's Strongest Man" runs towards a corner & smashes Sean into it. The foolish Patera didn't realize that he was running towards the Team Ireland corner. Aidan Donnelly makes a blind tag to Sean & enters the ring immediately. He performs an Inverted Suplex on Patera, then performs a Senton Splash on the Olympic weightlifter. Patera sits up with the impact & Aidan scrambles to make a cover. Before the ref can even count, Patera throws Aidan off! Aidan gets back to his feet again, but Patera is waiting & takes Aidan down with a Swinging Neckbreaker. Patera makes the tag to Rhenigans.*
Russ: This should be something to see. Two great technical wrestlers going at it!
*Aidan adopts a bit of an amateur wrestling stance & prepares to take Rhenigans down. Rhenigans attempts to kick Aidan's mid-section but Aidan blocks it & takes Rhenigans down with a Dragon Screw. He quickly follows up by tying Rhenigans' legs up in a Figure 4 Leg-Lock.*
Russ: I can't help but notice that both of your men out there tonight seem to be employing a more Submission based style, Coach. Thi wouldn't have anything to do with Liam O'Neill's departure from the team would it?
O'Hare: What the hell are babbling about? Surely you're not implying that I told them to work in a few more submission holds to compensate for the team's lack of a strong submission specialist.
Russ: That's exactly what I'm saying... & don't call me Shirley.
East: Lay off the so-called "humor", Nick. It's really not your strong suit.
*Back in the ring, Rhenigans is struggling in the Figure 4, but he manages to roll it over & put the pressure on Aidan's legs instead. Aidan quickly releases the hold. Rhenigans stands up & shakes his left leg a little to get the blood flowing again. Aidan takes advantage & Chop Blocks him. Aidan grabs Rhenigans by the left leg & drags him towards the Team Ireland corner. Aidan tags & lays down on the mat, stretching out the left leg of Rhenigans. Sean immediately springboards into the ring & drops his own leg across that of Rhenigans. Sean Tries to trap Rhenigans with a Spinning Toe Hold, but Rhenigans uses his good leg to force Sean over to the ropes. Sean tumbles over the rope & manages to land safely on the ring apron. Rhenigans follows over & attempts to knock Sean to the floor, but Sean springs into the ring & performs a Tornado DDT on Rhenigans.*
Russ: Looks like the submission tactics weren't working out for them. Team Ireland have decided to revert to their usual schtick.
East: With Team Ireland playing to their strengths again The Olympians could be in trouble.
*Sean rushes to make a cover on Rhenigans at the same time Patera enters the ring to break things up.*
O'Hare: The referee needs to do his job & get that musclehead out of there. 'Scuse me a second, lads.
*O'Hare gets on the ring apron & begins to argue with the referee. At the same time, he throws his Hurley into Aidan. Aidan takes a few steps across the ring & swings for Patera. Patrea ducks & clamps Aidan in the Full Nelson! The crowd goes crazy! Sean sees the Tricolour that Aidan brought to the ring with him & grabs it, using it to choke out Patera. All the while, O'Hare is keeping the referee back. When O'Hare is satisfied that Patera is dealt with, he lets the ref go back to work. Aidan lifts the weary & injured Rhenigans back to his feet & puts him in position for a Samoan Drop. Sean hits a Neckbreaker at the same time, completing "Whiskey in the Jar". Sean makes the cover...*
1...
2...
3!!!
DING-DING!!!
"TG" Toni Garcya: Here are your winners... TEAM IRELAND!
*O'Hare scrambles into the ring to retrieve his Hurley as Aidan & Sean celebrate.*
Russ: Well, he did say that they were goignt o get back on track & tonight Team Ireland defeated the former AWA World Tag-Team Champions. That's no mean feat.
East: This is only the start of it Nick. It won't be too long before Team Ireland have deposed Voltigeur, Sigma Williams, TJT, Mahavir Abha & made Liam O'Neill see good sense & get back in their ranks. Team Ireland are out for blood now. We better get used to the sight of them with their arms raised in victory!
*The trio of Irishmen head back-up the ramp with their arms held high as the audience, again, gives a mild cheer, but mostly boos.*
|
|
Square
Bill S. Preston, Esq.
Official Ambassador
Grand Poobah of Scavenger Hunts 2011
Square-Because he looks good at all the right angles.
Posts: 18,700
|
Post by Square on Oct 8, 2007 13:44:10 GMT -5
*Andy Davidson is shown walking out of his locker room, wearing instead of his old wrestling jeans new black jeans with the word "Gaurdinal" written down the side along with a new jacket. As he spins around and picks up a snooker cue by the door he bumps into someone wearing a black robe*
Andy Davidson: Hey mate sorry about that
*The person in the robe turns around and pulls back the hood to show a chiseled face with spiked up brown hair*
Man In Robe: You better be child otherwise I will have no option but make you pay for your sins
AD: Is that a threat, kinda ironic mate. Halloween is in 2 weeks time.
*The man in the robes goes face to face with Davidson*
Man In Robe: I AM THE HOLY FATHER DARREN MATTHEWS AND YOU WILL PAY FOR YOUR SINS
AD: Ask Sparks what I do to people that threaten me, for your carrer I advice you to stop. If your going to run your mouth more than your brain your out of your league here.
*Matthews shoulder barges past Davidson and heads off while Davidson is watching*
AD: The crazy come to EWT, just look at my tag partner
*Davidson walks off to the ring as the camera fades out to the next scene*
|
|
Ass Dan
King Koopa
Curious about extra lines
Have you seen me?
Posts: 12,259
|
Post by Ass Dan on Oct 8, 2007 17:38:06 GMT -5
We return from commercial to "the Wrestling Posse" Tenacious J&A in their locker room/broom closet.
Halaway: Hey, Jay?
McJobberston: Yeah, Axel?
Halaway: You hear about this India's Most Wanted?
McJobbeston: WELL.......no.
Halaway: Well, I heard...
Suddenly, a loud slamming sound is heard. WP turn around and see a frantic Noah Rodgers.
Rodgers: You've gotta help me!
Halaway: Why should we help you? Aren't you part of Minipax!
Rodgers: I was, but I broke down when I found out their plans!
McJobberston: Are they going to ban the release of HE-MAN?!
Rodgers: I found out the secrets that only Joe One knows of! EWT will be in ruins!
Halaway: Slow down. One thing at a time.
Noah shakes his head.
Rodgers: Okay. You know about the Nine Orders?
Halaway: Kind of.
Rodgers: Do you know what they're going to do with us when all Nine Orders are complete?
Halaway: Not really.
Rodgers: Everything you hold dearly will be destroyed! Chaos will reign! Joe One will rebuild the EWT in the Party's image!
McJobberston: Wait, what's going to happen? Is He-man okay or not?!
Rodgers: The first Five Orders you know. The Sixth Order has Minipax encompassing more than half of the EWT roster. The Seventh Order is a 'spark', leading to the Eighth Order, which is an all-out war between Minipax and the rest of EWT. The Ninth and...
Suddenly, various blue-jumpsuited men and women appear and start to attack Rodgers. While he takes an early advantage, he is eventually taken out by the various people and lieing on the floor, propped up by a few of the members. EWT World Heavyweight Champion Joe One walks up and sees Rodgers on the floor.
One: I see we have a Freddie in our ranks. Well, there's one thing to do about that.
One reaches into his jumpsuit and pulls out the BR.
Rodgers: The Brigate Rouge! Not the Brigate Rouge!
One: I think I'll read a piece from...
Both: Chapter 27!
Rodgers: Not Chapter 27! No!
Rodgers is drug off as One follows in toe. WP look at each other.
McJobberston: So what were you saying before the He-man man haters were here?
Halaway: Eh... I forget.
*COMMERCIAL BROKE*
|
|
|
Post by liontamer12 on Oct 8, 2007 22:06:36 GMT -5
We open to John “The Lion” Valentine sitting on a black-leather dining chair facing away from the camera. Amnestria moves into view from the right, She is clad in a white tank top and tight, faded jeans. She has with her a damp rag and a tin bowl of steaming water. She dips the cloth into the bowl, removes it and rings out the water from the rag to whence it came. All the while we hear nothing but the water trickle. She flicks her hair to the side in a quick, feminine motion and begins to wipe away the paint Valentine’s face. The black paint becomes apparent as a stain on the damp cloth as she returns to the bowl to rinse and ring. She continues until the paint is completely done. She plops the rag into the bowl and reaches to Valentine’s face, putting his wet, dangling hair behind his ears. He slowly turns to Amnestria and we see his profile. He stands up from the chair, again away from the camera. He puts on a black-leather jacket with a large logo of the Guardinals with the word’s “Guardinals” printed below it in big, white, block letters.
JLV: Facing away from the camera. Some will ask you if you smell what they’re cooking, some will ask for a “hell yeah,” some say that what they say is the damn truth and some say they’re that damn good. I say that I’m a wrestler. And damn it, that’s what I do. It’s my job, my career, my life, my joy, my passion, my lady, my lover and my friend. And come Survival of the Fittest, I have the opportunity to compete for the EWT World Heavyweight Championship. This isn’t a big rodeo buckle; this isn’t the mint on your pillow, the toy in the Happy Meal or even the extra cheese on the wrapper. This is the most symbolic material item for any man who has set foot in an EWT ring; a symbol representing EWT to the world. I too know what it’s like to be a champion. There’s nothing like the glimmer of the gold, the smell of the leather the recognition in the history books. He turns around, facing the camera. I also know that it’s worse to have loved and lost and to yearn for it ever after that it is to have never kissed that golden plate at the end of a match. I see that a few of you are seething, frothing at the mouth like animals to regain what you once had. It hurts, doesn’t it? You’re distracted, hungry, hyper-focused, and un-aware of you peripheral sight. That’s all the edge I need. Your starved appetites for precious metal will be your downfall. Whether this works out or not, I can’t say. But I do know that it’s an honor and a privilege to be in a match of this caliber and compete for the EWT World Heavyweight title and this wont be the last time I ever compete for the title. I’m humbled by the opportunity but disturbed by the disrespect that a certain “beast” has displayed. Angry. Look at these eyes Crauswell! Look at them! Camera zooms in on JLV’s eyes. Whether you like this or not, I am the King of the Jungle, the Sultan of the Savannah, the Prince of the Plains, the Baron of the Bush, the Father of the Forest, the Monarch of the mountain an the Regent of the Ring! You wanna’ dance half-breed?! Let’s Tango, you beaked freak! Oh, I’m not done! I’ve got something for you too, Holy Father. Good luck pal. You picked the wrong Catholic to mess with and I hope Team Ireland is with me on this! Next week, your sacrilegious, blasphemous candya** is mine! Calm, almost in soliloquy. Wow…that escalated really quickly…
Valentine grabs Amnestria’s willing hand and they begin out the door. Just before he reaches the threshold he turns and addresses the camera one final time.
JLV: Oh, and TJT, don’t think for one second that your goofy jackets aren’t next on the Guardinals’ hit list.
They both exit. Fade out.
|
|
|
Post by Oceanic on Oct 9, 2007 13:27:05 GMT -5
Backstage Sum Guy knocks on a dressing room door with a mic in one hand and a dumb grin on his mug. The door opens and Oceanic comes out, who appears to have come to terms with her recent loss to Ghostface and the Tri State Title.
Sum Guy: "Hello everybody! I'm Sum Guy and I like...."
Oceanic rips the microphone from his hands and conducts the interview herself.
Oceanic: "Take five, chief. I'll handle it from here.
It's been over a week since I lost the Tri State Title and I've made my peace with it. At first I was raging pissed off, sure, but I've calmed myself down since then. I went back home for a few days, collected myself, had a number of conversations with Maelstrom, and it's been wonderfully thereputic for me. But does that mean The Draugr and Elite Perfection are off the hook? Hell no. It means that those six clowns now have my full attention. If Maelstrom have to go through them one by one and show them what's up then that's what we're going to do.
First thing's first. Chance Confidence and I have a match coming up Survival Of The Fittest. Congratulations Chance! You'll be the first victim! Now Chance, I want you to pay very close attention to my match tonight. You're going to see something new. I've been experementing lately with my favorite submission hold, These Arms Are Snakes, and I came up with a variation of it that I think you'll find very interesting. At least you should find it interesting since I'm going to put you in it when we face each other. You've heard the old saying that the sequels are never as good as the first, but I promise that TAAS II will be far better than the original."
Oceanic tosses Sum Guy his microphone and walks off towards the arena. Sum Guy looks around slightly confused.
Sum Guy: "Uhhhh..........I still get paid for this, right?"
Cut to a quick commercial for Brockman's Chastity Belts: protecting your daughter's virtue for 75 years and counting!
Back in the ring The Magnificent Mimi is making her way down the aisle. Soon after "From Sinking" comes over the PA and the crowd responds with a big pop. Oceanic comes out from the back and slaps five with the occasional fan before sliding into the ring and sizing up her opponent. The bell rings and Mimi runs right at Oceanic, catching her off guard and delivers an axe handle across the chest. Mimi follows up with several forearm shot across the back until Oceanic falls down to her knees, where Mimi kicks her several times. Mimi scoops Oceanic up and body slams her before going to the ropes and delivering an elbow drop. Mimi goes for a big time upset.
1............... 2................
Oceanic kicks out. Mimi sends Oceanic into the ropes and attempts a high cross body but Oceanic ducks it and Mimi goes splat on the mat. Mimi stands up only to turn and get a super kick right across her face that knocks her flat on her back. Oceanic pounces on her and blasts away with several Thai elbow shots to the head and torso. She picks Mimi up and sends her into the buckles and charges in, blasting her with a Knee Bazooka, then picks Mimi up and places her on the top turnbuckles. Oceanic picks Mimi up again and lets her have it with the Hawaiian Muscle Buster. With Mimi flat on her back and groggy Oceanic quickly locks her arms around Mimi's head and hooks the inside arm with her legs and pulls the arm back so it hyper extends. Mimi taps out almost immediatly and the ref calls for the bell.
The Fink: "Here is your winner.................Oceanic!"
Oceanic lets go and stands up as the ref rushes over to Mimi to see if her arm is broken. Oceanic meanwhile makes a gesture towards Mimi and makes two C's with her hands, letting Chance Confidence know that's what is in store for him.
|
|
Tiffany
Mike the Goon
Don't ask me. I'm just a girl... aheheh, aheheh...
Posts: 39
|
Post by Tiffany on Oct 9, 2007 16:43:03 GMT -5
* Wendi Richter awaits in her opponent in the ring. She stretches against the ropes a little & flexes her muscles. The crowd gives her a slight pop.* "4 - 3 - 2-1...
4- 3 - 2-1...
1 - 2 - 3 - Whooo..."* Tiffany bounds excitedly out onto the entrance ramp wearing some kind of trashy looking schoolgirl outfit. The crowd seems to actually respond well to her. Particularly the drunken college frat boys the teenage boys. Unfortunately, the former are too drunk to raise their voices too much & in the case of the latter, most of their voices haven't broken yet, so their cheers are drowned out.* "TG" Toni Garcya: And her opponent, weighing in at 118lbs... TIFFANY! * Tiffany jumps up & down as her ridiculous looking implants sway along. She does a cartwheel on the entrance ramp, exposing her underwear to the crowd. The horny element make their voices heard & a number of young men are seen quickly running to the bathrooms. Unfortunately for Tiff, she clumsily falls flat on her ass after attempting the cartwheel. She quickly stands up & attempts to show her cleavage off a little but more. More young men swiftly run to the bathroom. Tiff slides into the ring under the bottom rope & does the splits to another crowd pop. Wendi Richter rolls her eyes.* DING-DING! * Without waiting for the awkward Tiffany to get back to her feet, Richter rushes at the bimbo & gives her a Rave Kick! Tiffany is OUT! Seemingly for real. The ref crosses his arms in an "X". Richter picks Tiff up & delivers the "Widowmaker" & covers...* 1... 2... 3!!! DING-DING-DING! Garcya: HERE IS YOUR WINNER... WENDI RICHTER!!! * EMTs come to ringside & help Tiffany out of the ring. She seems a bit dazed & her eyes look glassy, but she seems otherwise okay. She waves out to her fans as the medical team help bring her backstage.*
|
|
Spectre
Mike the Goon
"The echo of a point in time..."
Posts: 44
|
Post by Spectre on Oct 9, 2007 21:41:45 GMT -5
*As we fade in from commercial, the crowd is already booing the sight of one Curly Long. Curly's still a bit sore from the beating he took from Die before, but he still manages to sneer and leer at various audience members.*
CL: Welcome back, ya schmucks. Now I know I was out here before for a match, but I've got something I need to get off my truly sizable chest here!
*Crowd chant of "CLB!" starts up. Curly ignores it.*
CL: For the past God knows how long, we've had some jackass in the back, at ringside, hell, probably pretending he's Sting in the rafters or something, standing around and "challenging" members of the EWT roster.
So I'll tell you what: consider this an impromptu Colossal Colosseum, because I've want a special guest to join me in this ring right now. *Points towards entrance ramp* Spectre! Get your masked and mostly likely hideously deformed mug out here right now!
*Almost immediately "Perfect Strangers" plays over the PA. To the surprise of everyone, Spectre actually emerges from the crowd, leaping the guardrail; he had been observing the show from a seat in the middle of the crowd. Curly turns around, and nearly jolts himself out of his expensive (yet tacky) shoes.*
CL: Nice theatrics, pal; probably got you plenty of ass back when it was cool in high school.
*Spectre stands straight, his six foot frame obviously towering over the cantankerous midget.*
CL: Kid, I'm here to tell you something, make sure you've got the info you need for the upcoming pay per view. See, I've heard all these challenges you've been layin' out. I've seen what you've been doin' in the ring. Quite frankly, I ain't that impressed, but, hey, maybe that's just my opinion.
Still, I can't help but get annoyed every time that stupid mask of yours shows up on a TV screen, so I made a decision. Clearly, nobody else in the EWT has the scrote to step up to the plate against you and answer your challenge. Now, maybe you've got halitosis, but I won't hold that against you. By the by, for the record, do you have it?
*Curly holds the mic to Spectre's mouth, but just as quickly pulls it away.*
I know, truly an awful debilitation that's likely plagued you for years. Now, you say you want the best in the EWT? It's champions? It's "foundation"? Well take a good look, ya silly bastard! THIS right here *points to self* is the true foundation of this company!
Former Tag Team Champion, the true Midget King, and a legend of this industry! You want a champ stepping up to your challenge? I'm more of a champion than chumps, namely like you, could ever hope to be! *Clearly, the crowd isn't pleased by the Midget King's assertions*
So...whaddaya say?
*The crowd pops a bit as Spectre tilts his masked head, as if in thought. Finally, he reaches down, and deftly snatches the microphone from Curly's hands.*
S: I say this...you just got tossed around this ring like a lawn gnome about thirty minutes ago by a man whom I'd much rather match skills with. Get to the back and take a nap, have a juicebox or something.
*Curly's eyes turn into daggers as the crowd enjoys the put down.*
S: I also say that you're not worth my time and energy, that Mr. big will be busy and most likely not at your side that night, and that you'll be mud on the sole of my shoe by the end of the pay per view. However...I also say that a match is a match. And, yes, I do know we have one coming up.
In all seriousness, Curly Long, *Spectre begins to circle around the Midget King* I do have some measure of respect for your accomplishments in this company. For a man of your stature, physical AND mental *slight chuckle from the crowd*, to hold onto titles for as long as you did takes a lot...a lot of what, I don't really want to know, but whatever it is, a lot of it.
*Curly's lips are moving, but the censors won't let what he's saying go through. Spectre now stands still, staring straight at Curly*
But there is no denying your longevity here, your continued success, and the fact that no midget wrestler has stood among the regular roster the way you have...so I'll accept your challenge.
*Curly actually gives a slightly approving nod, his manhood validated for another day*
But I must warn you: you, my little friend...are simply going to be Step One. Be prepared to confront me...and yourself.
*Spectre lets the mic drop to the floor, and while still staring at his upcoming opponent, simply drops down and almost slithers out of the ring, making his way back through the crowd to his viewing area*
CL: *grabs the mic* What the hell does that even mean?! Friggin' Wachowski brother wannabe...fine, I'll "confront" whoever the hell you decide to make me face, even with Mr. Big preoccupied with that freakshow Bad-Man! I'll step right up, drag you down to size, and b****-slap that stupid mask off your face the second I step foot in the ring! I'll find out who your mother is, give her a call, and-
*Mercifully, the children at home are spared the aural deflowering as we fade to the next segment, Curly still ranting*
|
|
Limey
Unicron
It's been awhile.
Posts: 3,062
|
Post by Limey on Oct 10, 2007 2:18:28 GMT -5
*Joyce Grable makes her way out to the ring, dressed in a striking classic ring outfit, complete with a cowskin leather jacket and Stetson hat. She poses for the crowd by spinning an imaginary lariat, and gets decent heat from die-hard women’s wrestling fans (we’re talking REAL die-hard women’s wrestling fans).*
Chimel: The following contest is scheduled for one-fall! Introducing first, from Dallas, Texas, she is one half of the Texas Cowgirls…JOYCE GRABLE!!!
*Joyce Grable enters the ring, and takes her jacket and hat off, propping them on the ringpost.*
*”Round and Round” hits, and the crowd get on their feet as Carla O Woe makes her way out! She poses at the top of the entranceway, and throws up the horns to a massive pop, before charging down to the ring, and sliding all the way to the other side of it! Carla then shakes the hands of the many fans at ringside before climbing to the apron and throwing up the horns once more…but is blindsided by Joyce Grable!! Carla is hit with a club to the back, but hangs on to the ropes…Grable grabs at the hair of Carla, and chucks her into the ring!! Carla is on her knees trying to recover as Grable takes the ring gear of Carla O Woe, choking her!!! Carla claws at the ring gear, trying to release Grable’s grip…the bell sounds and the match is officially underway!!! Grable is forced to release the hold on Carla!*
*Grable chucks the ring attire out of the squared circle before heading back to Carla, dropping down and applying a chinlock…Carla gets to her feet and hits a back drop!! Grable is stunned by this, and quickly attempts to get to her feet…but Carla runs the ropes before hitting Grable with a lightning-fast hurricanrana!!! Grable is down in the middle of the ring, and Carla takes her by the wrist, dragging her to the corner! Carla then climbs the rope, and appeals to the crowd before leaping off with the EYE CANDY!!! Carla connects, and goes for the cover!!!*
1, 2, 3!!!
Winner: Carla O Woe!!!
*Carla appeals, and the crowd go nuts for her! She goes over to Tony Chimel, however, and takes the mic.*
Carla: Joyce Grable…you don’t have what it takes to hang with the women of the GND Division!!! When I came back here, I wanted a challenge, and I was given Linda Ragnal, I was given “The Original” Syn, Synthy Eris…but you aren’t even close to the level of competition that I’m used to…However…
*Carla continues…*
Carla: However, there is one opponent that is…someone outstanding…someone who I want to face in the ring…someone…but I’m not revealing anything just yet. Rest assured, though, it’ll be one hell of a match.
*Carla throws down the mic, and makes her way back as the crowd is left wondering just who the hell she’s referring to.*
|
|
|
Post by thesunshinesquad on Oct 10, 2007 9:14:27 GMT -5
As we return to the ring after a commercial break, we see AWA Alumni, Candi Devine standing by in the ring, waving politely to the crowd, as she dons her trademark black jacket and cheetah striped top. She slowly removes that jacket, as the crowd starts booing with the sounds of this next woman's entrance. The annoying sound of If You're Happy and You Know It pumps out as a familiar bald woman skips out, a big grin on her twisted face, as she scowls a bit at the audience, pointing to her self, then making a belt motion around her waist, her top has been altered as well, the image of a fuschia haired frowning face, the sight that looks they're no longer among the living visible, as Vivian giggles, skipping down towards the ring, the crowd booing quite loudly.
Announcer: The following contest is scheduled for one fall! Introducing first, from the Land of Imagination, weighing in at 159 pounds, Dr. Vivian Anemone!
Candi gives a cautious loo towards her rather crazed opponent, as she prepares herself, ready to tackle this woman.
Announcer: And her opponent, from Nashville Tennesee, weighing in at 127 pounds, Candi Devine!
Anemone quickly slips into the ring, popping back up and giving Candi a rather angry look, skipping up to the center of the ring, motioning quickly for Devine to follow, as she does so. The bell quickly sounds and this one is underway as they lock up. Candi takes early control, putting Vivian in a headlock, who quickly backs up into the ropes, sending Devine off to the other side, as the doctor charges, leaping over as she comes back, then taking her into a Snapmare as she comes back, delivering a stiff kic to the back of the neck! Candi whinces slightly, as she rises back to her feet, Vivian continuing with a quick series of kicks all over her body, quickly running in front and delivering a dropkick right to the previously injured jaw of Candi, who immediately drops to the mat! She clutches at the area, as Vivian giggles, immediately yanking her up into a seated position, leaping up and hitting another dropkick into the area, as she drops down, looking for a cover. 1...2.
Candi kicks out. Vivian smiles, simply yanking up Candi by her hair, pulling her into a series of knees right into the face. Candi grimaces from the blows, as Vivian quickly sends her off the ropes, catching her as she comes back with a calf kick to the jaw, knocking her back down. She immediately pops back up, walking over and delivering a quick series of stomps across that same jaw, as Devine yelps in pain, groaning and trying to sit back up, Vivian helping by pulling her up once again, taking her right into a Hangman's neckbreaker, as she quickly drops for the cover. 1....2...
Candi kicks out once again. Vivian looks a bit annoyed, as she pulls Candi back up, grabbing her and hitting a quick jawbreaker, Candi looking wide eyed in pain, as she stumbles back, Vivian quickly charging off the ropes, coming back with a brutal spinning wheel kick right to the face, most of the impact once again focused on that jaw area. She drops down hard, rolling along the mat, as Anemone grins, running over to the nearby turnbuckle, springing atop, as she measures Candi, then leaping off for a double footed stomp, Candi however rolling out of the way! Anemone lands on her feet, looking surprised, as she quickly pulls Candi off the mat, only for her to fight out. She starts delivering a few hard slaps to the face, following up with a quick series of forearms, Vivian stumbling back from the attacks, as Candi sends her off the ropes, charging and delivering a running knee lift, sending Anemone sprawled out on the mat! She groans, rising back up, clutching her chest, as Candi charges, kicking her in the chest, then grabbing her for an Implant DDT, Vivian's face bouncing hard off the mat, as she clutches the area. Candi looks down, quickly making a cover of her own. 1...2...
Vivian kicks out this time. Candi looks down, yanking Vivian up to her feet now, leaping up for a umping neckbreaker, only for Vivian to quickly throw her off! Candi lands hard, clutching her tailbone, as she rises back up, turning around into a flying clothesline from Anemone! She groans, hitting the mat hard, as Anemone walks over, very angry, as she grabs Devine's jaw with her bare hands, looking to be trying to pry it off! Candi screams in pain, looking in horror, as she flails from the pain, Vivian showing no remorse as she keeps prying away, Devine trying to get free, but to no avail, the crippling pain of this move too much for her to stand. She reaches down, almost instantly tapping out.
The crowd boos loudly as Vivian let's go, giggling and bowing to her "adoring" public as the bell sounds.
Announcer: Here is your winner by submission... Dr. Vivian Anemone!
Vivian looks back down at Devine, still clutching her mouth, as she immediately shakes her head, a big smile on her face, as she slids out of the ring, grabbing a certain steel chair of hers from under the ring, holding it up and smiling, smacking the steel smiling seat of it, as she rolls back into the ring, setting it up in the center of the ring, then pulling Candi back up, taking her into an Upside Down Frown, driving her mouth first right into the chair! Candi lets out a muffled yelp of pain as the crowd boos relentlessly, Vivian smiling and pushing Devine aside, shrugging her shoulders innocently, as she scoops the chair up.
Vivian: Hey champ... your next! I can't wait till we get to have some good ol horseplay!
She giggles, looking down at the twitching Candi Devine, who is in definite need of medical attention and possibly plastic surgery, as If You're Happy and You Know It starts up once again, Vivian rolling quickly out of the ring and heading to the back amongst the booing crowd, hugging her chair close as she does, a very twisted sneer on her face.
|
|
|
Post by SsnakeBite, the No1 Frenchman on Oct 10, 2007 13:07:42 GMT -5
*We fade in the EWT arena where « Sexually Suggestive » Ivy Rosepine and her opponent Wendy Richter are already in the ring and the announcement has just been done. Mysth is at ringside to support his girlfriend. We can barely hear « Hysteria » fading out before the bell rings.*
DING DING !
*The two women stare at each other for a few sconds, trying to find an opening. Richter tries to grab Rosepine, who counters and Irish whips her opponent who ends in the corner, showing her back, which allows Ivy to immediately connect with the Guèpière ! Wendy Richter stumbles and faces Ivy again, only to get caught with a Powerslam ! With Richter down, Ivy jumps on the turnbuvkle she threw her in and goes for the Shooting Star Stomp ! Wendi clutches her stomach in pain, and Ivy grabs her by the head and gets her to her knees, but Richter suddenly rises and takes Rosepine down with a Facebuster ! Richter now tries to find a second wind, but doesn’ t see Ivy’ s leg coming for a sweep. Ivy taunts the downed Wendi Richter and runs to the ropes for the Shining Witch ! Rosepine grabs a handful of Richter’ s hair and pulls her back to her feet, then sets her up for an Emerald Fusion ! Ivy Rosepine does a sexy pose for the crowd, and especially for Mysth, to who she gives a sensual glare and blows him a kiss which makes him smiles gladly. This gave Richter enough time to slowly get up. Ivy notices it and gets ready to welcome her… with the Painful Truth ! But before Richter completely falls down, Rosepine has time to grab her to the waist and perform the IVY BOMB !! And she covers her opponent.*
ONE !
TWO !
THREE !
DING DING DING !
*This victory was almost too easy for Ivy. « Hysteria » hits for the second time tonight, but it quickly fades out as Mysth hands a microphone to the sexually suggestive Frenchwoman.*
Ivy : Terina, I have a few words for you… the time of the foreplays is over, it’ s time to start the serious business and see if you can really go the distance. I’ ve been rather frustrated by you so far so I hope you can prove to be more energical during the act. I hate when my partner rushes things, I like it when it lasts veeeeeery long and that I can appreciate every single second of it. I like it when we have time to try different things. And I LOVE it when once it’ s over, I’ m fully satisfied from a nice, long act that had a lot of variety. That’ s why, at Survival of the Fittest, I challenge you for a match tha t will really test your stamina ! Because Terina, I want you…
…in a Best 2 out of 3 falls count anywhere match !
*The crowd erupts*
Ivy : And again, none of us will bring their toys ! It will just between you and me, in private ! This way, Terina, we will see if you can go the distance or if you’ re a premature wrestler !
« Peace Sells » suddenly hits and Terina appears at the end of the ramp, holding a microphone.*
Terina : Guess what, slut ? You’ re on ! Survival of the Fittest is a Pay Per View that tells things just the way they are ! Only the strongest ones can survive here, and the failures of evolution like you vanish in the dark. So at Survival of the Fittest, I will show you what a proper wrestlegasm is !
* « Peace Sells » hits again and Terina disappears behind the toomitron. Ivy and Mysth are still standing in the ring, with Ivy having a big grin on her face.*
|
|
Square
Bill S. Preston, Esq.
Official Ambassador
Grand Poobah of Scavenger Hunts 2011
Square-Because he looks good at all the right angles.
Posts: 18,700
|
Post by Square on Oct 10, 2007 15:00:28 GMT -5
*Ole Anderson is shown walking around the ring while the fans are chanting "Davidson" and the fans chants are answered as "This Ain't a Scene" hits and out comes Andy "The Eagle" Davidson, along with his weapon of choice the snooker cue*
Justin Roberts: FROM PRESTON, ENGLAND. HE WEIGHS IN AT 280 POUNDS, HE IS ANDY "THE EAGLE DAVIDSON!
*As Davidson jumps into the ring Ole takes the advantage and starts the blows to the head. Ole runs to the ropes and as he goes for a forearm Davidson almosts knocks him out with a bycycle kick. Davidson picks up Anderson, irish whips him and powerslams him, he drags him close to the turnbuckle and climbs. Davidson soaks in the atmosphere and lands the London Eye, banging his head badly on the mat. He shakes the cobwebs off and sloppy lands Ole with the Eagle's Landing and pins for the 3*
JR: HERE IS THE WINNER, ANDY DAVIDSON
|
|
Tiffany
Mike the Goon
Don't ask me. I'm just a girl... aheheh, aheheh...
Posts: 39
|
Post by Tiffany on Oct 10, 2007 15:01:32 GMT -5
Backstage- EWT Arena
*Tiffany is seen leaving the trainers room.*
Trainer: It's just a mild injury. You'll be over it in a few days, miss.
Tiffany: Thanks alot. You're SO awesome.
Trainer: Uhhh... Thanks?
*He closes the door & Tiffany walks off looking a little dejected.*
Tiffany: *Sigh* It's getting pretty late. I guess it's getting less & less likely that all my new colleagues are going to jump out & yell "SURPRISE! HAPPY BIRTHDAY!"...
*She walks towards the women's locker room, a delivery guy stops her before the entrance.*
Delivery Guy: Pardon me, ma'am. Are you Tiffany?
Tiffany: Well, yes. Yes, I am.
Delivery Guy: This package is for you, ma'am.
*He hands her two parcels. One, a rather large box, the other a smaller, softer gift-wrapped present.*
Tiffany: *Gasp* Jack! I KNEW he wouldn't forget!
Delivery Guy: Excuse me, ma'am. You still have to sign for that.
Tiffany: Oh, right.
*Tiff signs the sheet on his clip-board & enters the locker-room.*
Tiffany: Hey, girls!
*There's nobody else around. She slumps onto a bench. She excitedly opens the large box. It's a cake. She squeals in delight.*
Tiffany: Oh, Jack.
*She rolls her eyes a little, then notices that the cake has the following message on it: "Happy Birthday, Love Mom & Dad".*
Tiffany: Oh...
*She excitedly opens the other parcel, knowing that it must be from Jack Jupiter. It's a teddy bear with a small gift tag attached. She turns it over only to see "Happy Birthday, Love your big sis". Tiff slumps down again.*
Tiffany: Only my family remembered my birthday & I can't even BE with them?
*Tiff cries over the cake her parents sent her & clutches the teddy bear from her sister close to her chest. Her sobs echoing throughout the empty locker-room.*
|
|
Rated X
Tommy Wiseau
The following post has been RATED X
Posts: 60
|
Post by Rated X on Oct 10, 2007 21:51:08 GMT -5
We (finally!!) fade into the Rated X locker room, where all 3 men are preparing for their matches. Nunez is preparing for Zenk, Corral is getting ready for "Cowboy" Bob Orton, and Chad Michaels is preparing for "Da Bad Guy" Scott Hall. All three men turn towards each other, all nodding.
Chad: For respect.
Mike: For honor.
Jesse: For the bitches!
Chad and Mike look at Jesse with the "o.O" look.
Jesse: What?
Chad: Nothing. Now Mike, you talked to Marcus?
Mike: He knows what to do.
Chad: Jesse, you got things ready?
Jesse: Fo' sho.
Chad: Good, let's take care of those three jokers we got, then we can focus on the bigger picture.
Mike: For the good of EWT.
Chad: To restore honor.
Jesse: For the bitches!!
Chad and Mike look at Jesse with the "O.o" look once more.
Jesse: What?!
Chad: Nothing. Let's do this!
All three men nod towards each other before heading out, ready to make an impact once more.
|
|
Rated X
Tommy Wiseau
The following post has been RATED X
Posts: 60
|
Post by Rated X on Oct 10, 2007 22:13:52 GMT -5
We cut to the EWT Arena, where Tom Zenk is standing in the ring, awaiting some action. Suddenly, "Offbeat Bare Ass" by 311 begins to play as the lights start flashing in tune with the music. As the lyrics kick in, Jesse Nunez jumps out, full of energy. Jesse heads down to the ring, slapping hands with fans on the way. Jesse slides into the ring and tosses his hands in the air before turning his attention to Zenk. Jesse tosses his cap into the crowd before removing his shirt, ready to fight.
----- Ding Ding Ding! -----
Zenk wastes no time, going straight after Nunez with a clothesline. Nunez ducks the clothesline, rotates quickly, locks the other arm in, and hits his patented Border Hopper. Zenk just lies on the ground as Jesse looks at him in disbelief, mouthing "The f***?" Nunez just rolls Zenk over before covering him, still in disbelief.
1...
2...
3. It's over folks.
Announcer Person: Here is your winner, Jesse Nunez!
Nunez just looks at the fallen Zenk before shaking his head, muttering "Punk muthaf***a". Nunez exits the ring and walks to the back as we get ready for the next match.
|
|
Ass Dan
King Koopa
Curious about extra lines
Have you seen me?
Posts: 12,259
|
Post by Ass Dan on Oct 11, 2007 12:43:29 GMT -5
¢
£
A
¥
'No One Knows' hits the speakers, and the audience boos, knowing who's coming.
Announcer: The following contest is schedulaled for one fall. Introducing first, representing the EWT Stable Champions Minipax, from Cash Mountain, weighing in at 262 lbs., Richard Clay!
The audience boos at Clay comes out with his EWT Stable Championship.
Announcer: And his opponent, already in the ring, from Beverly Hills, California, weighing in at 241 lbs., Nick Bockwinkel!
The crowd cheers Bockwinkel, who waves at the crowd. Clay takes off his belt and vest and gives it to the referee, who hands it off before signaling for the bell.
*ding ding ding*
The two men hunch over, looking to strike, when Bockwinkel lies down. Clay quickly covers. The referee, confused, makes the count.
1!
2!
3!
*ding ding ding*
Announcer: Here is your winner, Richard Clay!
The audience is confused by Bockwinkels actions, but when Clay brings out a chequebook, they start to boo. After writing a cheque, Clay hands it over to Bockwinkel, who shakes his hand and leaves the ring. Clay asks for a microphone, and, of course, recieves one.
Clay: Do you see that, Dorf? It's that easy. Give me what I want, and I'll give you a handsome amount. Almost as handsome as I am, by the way.
Suddenly, 'Sign' starts up, and the fans get on their feet as Dorf comes from the back. He also has a microphone.
Dorf: How many times do I have to tell you, Clay? I'm not selling my stock in EWT, especially to the likes of you.
The crowd cheers. Clay walks a bit, then turns to Dorf.
Clay: How about this, Dorf? At Survival of the Fittest, we have a wrestling match. If you win, I'll refrain from bidding for your share in Extreme WrestleCrap Threaderation Entertainment, LLC. If I win, you MUST sell your share to me. Are you confident enough to put your...
Dorf: If you say 'money where your mouth is', I'm going to sock you. And no, I'm not going to give you the opportunity to aquire my share in the EWT. No matter how badly you beat me, I'm not going to surrender my half of EWT. So stop trying....or just do!
'Sign' starts up again as Dorf leaves the stage. Clay stares a hole through Dorf as we...
*DO SOMETHING ELSE*
|
|
Spyke the Pacers Fan
El Dandy
Still hates himself for missing the last episode of Murder She Wrote
Go Indiana!
Posts: 8,061
|
Post by Spyke the Pacers Fan on Oct 11, 2007 13:58:24 GMT -5
*Buddy Rose is in the ring. Nobody knows why he's there. He's just kinda... there.* Suddenly...
[Lyrics] "Music's got me feeling so free, we're gonna celebrate! Celebrate and dance for free... ONE MORE TIME!"
"One More Time" by Daft Punk hits and the crowd goes nucking futs! Spyke Johannson makes a surprise return and barrels full-speed towards the ring!*
*bell dings*
Spyke slides into the ring and catches Buddy off-guard. Spyke spears Buddy Rose to next month! Spyke lifts him up off the mat and hits the one, the only, SwedeDT! Pin attempt by Spyke.
1!
2!
3!
*bell dings*
*The crowd pops like no tomorrow and Spyke gets his arm raised in victory.
Lillian Garcia: "Here is your winner, SPYKE JOHANNSON!"
*Spyke grabs the mic from Lillian and waits for the crowd to quiet down. Once they do, Spyke raises the mic...*
Spyke: "I'm back... to do this thing... ONE MORE TIME!"
*"One More Time" hits again and Spyke dances his way back up the ramp, soaking in the crowds cheers.*
|
|
Oak: Certified Jade Hater
Bill S. Preston, Esq.
Edgier than Wayne Brady, Harder than Chinese Arithmetic, and Higher than the ratings for Blade: The Series
TOP ROPE CATCH A VIBE YEAH I SWERVE WHEN I DRIVE
Posts: 15,390
|
Post by Oak: Certified Jade Hater on Oct 11, 2007 22:22:33 GMT -5
"Cowboy" Bob Orton stands in the ring, trying to be heelish. Unfortunately, that's kinda hard to do when you're like 50-something.
"RRRRRREACH OUT AND TOUCH FAITH!!"
"Another Body Mudered (Personal Jesus Intro)" by Faith No More begins to play as the lights turn white and blue. Out steps Mike Corral, GWE Heavyweight Title in hand. Corral walks down to the ring, focused on the task at hand.
Corral slides into the ring, holding the GWE Title high in the air. Corral heads straight for Orton, not in a threatning mood, but almost in a show of respect. Corral extends his right hand in a show of respect, the other hand holding his title. Orton seems unsure, but Corral keeps his arm out. Eventually, the two shake hands as the fans begin to cheer.
Orton goes to turn away, but Corral keeps hold of the arm before clocking Orton with the GWE Heavyweight Title. Orton falls to the ground as Corral looks at him, no expression on his face. Corral places one fott on Orton, yellling at the ref to make the count.
Aaand, it's over folks.
Announcer: Here is your winner, Mike Corral!!
Corral doesn't head straight to the back, doesn't continue the assault on Orton... but rather, he heads for the announcer. Corral grabs the microphone from his hands before entering the ring, Orton still laid out.
Corral: For quite some time now, I've kept my mouth shut. I haven't expressed my feelings about the going ons in this company. Well right now, I'm feeling pretty pissed off right now, and there are three people who I need to address.
Joe One, you evil son of a bitch. You seem to forget that you and me have still yet to have the match that we both know is bound to happen. You duck and dodge me, even when I make an open challenge to you. Rest assured One, our match will come, one way or another.
Dorf. Our esteemed boss. So far, I've had no problems with you, and I respect everything you've done in EWT.
Toomi. Stop booking us, the roster, against old has-beens who's best days were 50 years ago when popcorn was 2 damn cents. We're the future of this business, guys who are in our teens, 20's and 30's. We don't need to be taking on these old prehistoric dinosaurs like Bob Orton and Scott Hall. Speaking of which...
Mike points at the ToomiTron, where we see Chad Michaels and Jesse Nunez viciously assaulting Scott Hall. Chad and Jesse hit the Plastic Surgery, knocking Hall out.
Mike: You see. We need younger wrestlers, guys who can hold their own. Not denture wearing, viagra using, blind as a f***ing bat wrestlers who were popular so many years ago. Give us the Briscoe Bros. Give us Human Tornado. Hell, give us Pelle Primeau. Anything except for these old geezers.
Youc an respect the contributions of Ric Flair, of Nick Bockwinkle, of Tito Santana, and of Ole F***ing Anderson. But there comes a time when that era of wrestling is DEAD. And that era has been dead since disco. We need real challenges Toomi. And we deserve them.
"Another Body Murdered" plays as Corral drops the microphone. Some of the fans are cheering as Corral grabs his GWE Heavyweight Title and heads to the back, while Orton is still out.
|
|
Ass Dan
King Koopa
Curious about extra lines
Have you seen me?
Posts: 12,259
|
Post by Ass Dan on Oct 11, 2007 23:09:50 GMT -5
Joe One is seen in the back, having just watched the promo. He turns around in his chair, his EWT World Heavyweight Championship title in his jumpsuit's loops.
One: Ah, Mr. Corral. It seems you think you deserve a match against me. I think that your attempt at reilling my nerves has failed. You see, I'm the Extreme WrestleCrap Threaderation World Heavyweight Champion, not the God-awful Worthless Entertainment Champion like you. My title has prestige, which is why I only wrestle quality opponents. You, Mr. Corral, are not a quality opponent.
One strokes his chin.
One: In fact, I've defeated you twice, haven't I? Once in a one-on-one encounter, and another in a two-on-two encounter. From what I can tell, I am the better man. You have no proof as to show your superiority in any way. As soon as you are able to prove to me, without a shadow of a doubt, that you are worthy of losing to me again, you may have your match. However, until then, I am out to conquer the remaining pieces of the EWT I haven't crossed. Gloryvic and good day.
He turns back around in his chair. He quickly turns back.
One: Also, no match for me this week. Preparing for Megadeth III, you see.
Larry Zybsko is seen carrying a large briefcase and the ECW World Heavyweight Championship.
Zybsko: Thanks, Richard Clay!
Zybsko gives a thumb's up and the camera does a still-shot as 80's TV music plays.
*FADE OUT*
|
|
|
Post by Mystery on Oct 12, 2007 0:09:00 GMT -5
*Sum Guy is standing backstage, walking.*
Sum Guy: I think I can, I think I can, I think I can.
*Sum Guy knocks on the locker room door & has no answer.*
Sum Guy: Phew. I don't have to do the interview.
*Sum Guy turns around & is face to face with Mystery.*
Sum Guy: *gulp* Um, Mystery...hi. I was just, um, wondering...what are your thoughts on your match against Tiffany at Survival of the Fittest?
Mystery: My thoughts? My thoughts? Why would I need thoughts when facing somebody with no brain? She's in my way of my destiny.
Sum Guy: You're destiny?
Mystery: Do you not pay attention?
Sum Guy: The Girl Next Door Championship is already being contested. Plus a #1 Contender's Match is happening at Survival of the Fittest.
Mystery: You don't get it. Nobody gets it. It's love. There is nothing more to do here then love. You and me Were made to be in love Dont let them tear us apart You and me Youre all I ever need Look in my eyes cant you see? You and me were made for love
You can lock your door You can live alone You can dim your lights Disconnect the phone You can run But you will live in a lie
You and me Were made to be in love
Sum Guy: Awww shucks. I din't know you cared. Is that why you beat me up? Like on the playground? I love you too, Mystery.
*Mystery knees Sum Guy & hits him with a DDT. She then drops a lime on him & walks away.*
|
|
Limey
Unicron
It's been awhile.
Posts: 3,062
|
Post by Limey on Oct 12, 2007 8:37:12 GMT -5
*Sum Guy, dripping with lime juice, is interviewing Limey in the designated backstage area. He is a little bruised, but tries to be cheery.*
SG: I'm Sum Guy, and I feel all sticky. Limey, I assume you've read the matchboard recently...I want to know your thoughts.
Limey: My thoughts? Hmm...well, ordinarily I would team with whomever, and go out there and do what I'm paid to do...
SG: You get...paid? We aren't all doing this for free?
Limey: ...that's what management told you, right?
SG: Well, actually at the moment, I have to pay management myself, for the privilege of working for EWT's...
Limey: Forget it. As I was saying, I go out there, and I do what I'm best at! That includes teaming with EWT's finest to do so, and they don't get finer than the World Heavyweight Champion...except...
SG: Well?
Limey: Joe One...that guy is a complete sociopath. I know it's going to be a nightmare to try and work with him...but I know taking a loss here would do nothing for him. He needs the win as much as I, he NEEDS the momentum...probably more than me, more than Mysth, more than Crauswell...Hell, more than John Valentine and even Christopher Indigo, because we are all, and I DO mean all, gunning for the top prize...and Joe can't screw up to do that. So here's what I need to do...I'm going to go out there, get the big W, and leave. That's all there is to it.
SG: And...what about Mystery?
Limey: Mystery...I worry about her...
SG: She seems to have developed some sort of...attachment to you.
Limey: I'm not blind, Sum...I think I've gotten myself into a real jam here...but it shouldn't matter...when I said Mystery was a beautiful, talented woman, I MEANT it! But all this talk about "destiny"? I don't want to screw her brains up even more than they already are!
SG: ...thank God you said "screw her brains *UP*" rather than...
Limey: (ignoring)...and now I'm experiencing the biggest match since my return...I need to concentrate on it, but she's always there! It just feels...Sum, let me put it this way...
*Carla O Woe walks in, cutting Limey off*
Carla: (a little peeved) Limey! Have you seen the matchboard??
Limey: Oh...hi, Carla...yeah, I can see why you'd be upset about...
Carla: My goal here in EWT is to face off against the best of the GND Division, great! They give me Ivy Rosepine and Madison the Clown Girl, two fantastic athletes...and then they team me with Mystery?? Why Mystery??
Limey: ...you wanted the best of the GND Division, correct?
Carla: ?
Limey: Carla, like it or not, Mystery has talent. I don't like teaming with Joe One...but I'm going through with it, because that's my job...I should stick with it.
Carla: Limey? What's with you? Why are you sticking up for Mystery?
Limey: You've seen how she's been! She needs help! I don't believe in "destiny"...but that doesn't mean I can't try and help her out, try and make her see sense without causing her to snap!
Carla: You've got to talk to her...
Limey: *Sigh* I know...after my match. I need to prepare.
Carla: ...fine. I'll try not to piss her off...
*Limey and Carla go their separate ways as Sum Guy is left alone.*
SG: Well, interesting words from Limey and Carla. I'm Sum Guy, and this part of the interview is brought to you by Cobra Beer! Drink Cobra Beer right now!
*Sum brings a beer bottle up to his lips.*
Director: Aaaaand CUT!
*India's Most Wanted walk into frame.*
Kuresh Harishandra: Very good work, Sum.
SG: (Spitting out Beer) Alright! I did what you asked! Now where's Mister Rockelstein??
Jayant Monsoon: (brings out pet rock, bound and "gagged".) Take a bigger swig next time or we'll throw him in the lake...tied to a bigger rock!
*Monsoon shoves the rock into Sum Guy's chest and walk off laughing. We cut to the next segment.*
|
|