Sometimes I just think too much.

[ToyfareMark]

Usually I never post anything very personal on here, I just try to have alot of fun reading and posting in fun topics. The last few days though have been very trying on me emotionally and I just need to tell somebody...anybody about whats going on in my head.

I've been suffering from depression and social anxiety disorder for years. It makes it really hard to meet new people, or even be around new people, and it makes it hard for me to express myself to the people that are already close to me.

I'm not gonna explain all the bad things that are going on in my life or anything. But sometimes I'll think about them alot, and when I do it really really hurts. So what happens is that I start getting angry, not physically violent or anything, but just very angry. Sometimes this happens when I'm at work and people will say things too me and I'll just give them a mean look and a grunt and then just walk away.

I really wish that wouldnt happen to me, it happened on Tuesday at work, and a girl there I really like saw it, and now thinks I'm mad at her. She's going through alot of stuff right now too so I feel really badly about it. I'll do my best to explain it to her, but I still didnt want her to see me going through one of my depression fits like that.

Like the title says, sometimes I think too much, and when I do even more bad things seem to happen. I'm not having violent thoughts, I dont want to hurt myself, I'm not asking for peoples advice on here or anything. I just needed to vent about this.

[Deleted]

Sorry to hear about this situation. The WC Forums have your back, man.

[efram]

crap advice from me but why don't you start doing more things that you enjoy??? that might help take your mind off things or take up a hobby or something to meet new people??? this is very pot calling the kettle black as i'm quite similar at work, people find me very cold and stand-offish when i'm really just shy

[Rorschach]

I take medication for the same sort of thing...anxiety, depression, and fits of anger. My thing is, I HATE taking the meds, since I feel like a junkie or a defective when I do. But if I don't take them, I slide into deep spiraling depressions that threaten to consume me.

I find that watching comedic movies, or visiting humor websites like Cracked.com, or the LOLCAT websites really helps my mood. You'd be surprised at how much better a good laugh can make you feel.

[Annette]

I'm not too good at meeting new people either - that's why this place is great, meeting new people in a basically safe, secure environment.

I'm sending lots of good vibes your way that things get better!

[Garee]

Man all I can say is life is tough sometimes, you just gotta take it one day at a time, thats really the only advise I can give

[Rube]

Have you tried therapy?

[i.Sarita.com]

I know what you're dealing with, I was released from my military duties for having Major Depression and mild Anxienty disorder stemming from chronic Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. I often find it hard to enjoy ANYTHING and feel very empty for no real reason. I was almost killed in Iraq, plenty of times, but it was leaving behind everybody I considered "family" that got me the most...

It's hard for anyone to actually tell you the best way to help, since everyone suffering from something like this finds different ways to make themselves feel alive again. I've found that most of the run of the mill, treat them all the same "treatments" don't really work for most people...its mostly up to you to find something MORE powerful that the disorder. Something that gives you that edge to beat it, but that something is inside of YOU...

Be it family, a hobby, a pill, a defining moment, a dream, a girl, a God, or maybe just going out in the woods and yelling at the top of your lungs that "YOU WANT TO LIVE, DAMMIT!" Just remember that the world may seem like it's closed in around all of your demons, but its a huge open opportunity...and eventually, you'll realize that you have control over your mind and your future...

Stay strong pal

[aka Cthulhu]

Well, I was in a similar situation, and the aftermath has certainly changed my attitude, or at the very least freed my original personality from past anxieties. Long story short: back in high school I was a social outcast. Got betrayed, took revenge, betrayed some people, got betrayed some more, made some important friends and fast forward a few years into right now. I certainly don't trust anyone anymore. I'm friendly to those around me in real life but I don't seem to find anything to have a genuine connection. In fact, I'm 19 and I seem to have no interest in any kind of relationship. I take medication, though it isn't for psychological problems, since I have chronic pain on my back and legs.

But despite everything, I'm happy and satisfied. I quite enjoy looking at life as some sort of game, and I am looking forward to more interesting things in the future. I know you're not looking for advice, but let me just say that all you need to do is follow what you think is right for you.

In fact, it's kind of weird how I've never felt depressed at all.

[Non Banjoble Tokens]

Sometimes I think too little. Well, most of the time, actually.

[The Harbinger of Tragedy]

Well, five years ago I had a nervous breakdown which resulted in severe social anxiety and mild depression, so I think I can relate to how you are feeling. If you need to talk, PM me.

[darthalexander]

I've been doing the depression thing for over 20 years now and I know what it's like and how horrible it is. I find if people haven't experienced it themselves they can't really "appreciate" what it's like. Not to say they don't care, but unless you've lived it I find you really can't get just how god-awful it is.

I have done the medication thing, but for me all it did was "turn down the volume" of it. It was still there, just muted, and sometimes it would still come screaming back regardless of the meds.

One of the worst things about depression is that you are a prisoner of your own mind and it has a nasty habit of bringing up every damn horrible thing in your life over and over again. It's like it's a different person living inside you that takes a perverse pleasure in tormenting you over and over.

I'm not sure how extreme you are at this stage, but if you were like I was a couple of years ago you may have to go on medication, at least temporarily, to help ease the pain a bit.

Like villainy said, if you want to talk - PM me as well...trust me, I've been there so I know what it's like.

[ddt]

Aug 6, 2008 21:25:11 GMT -5 ToyfareMark said:

Usually I never post anything very personal on here, I just try to have alot of fun reading and posting in fun topics. The last few days though have been very trying on me emotionally and I just need to tell somebody...anybody about whats going on in my head.

I've been suffering from depression and social anxiety disorder for years. It makes it really hard to meet new people, or even be around new people, and it makes it hard for me to express myself to the people that are already close to me.

I'm not gonna explain all the bad things that are going on in my life or anything. But sometimes I'll think about them alot, and when I do it really really hurts. So what happens is that I start getting angry, not physically violent or anything, but just very angry. Sometimes this happens when I'm at work and people will say things too me and I'll just give them a mean look and a grunt and then just walk away.

I really wish that wouldnt happen to me, it happened on Tuesday at work, and a girl there I really like saw it, and now thinks I'm mad at her. She's going through alot of stuff right now too so I feel really badly about it. I'll do my best to explain it to her, but I still didnt want her to see me going through one of my depression fits like that.

Like the title says, sometimes I think too much, and when I do even more bad things seem to happen. I'm not having violent thoughts, I dont want to hurt myself, I'm not asking for peoples advice on here or anything. I just needed to vent about this.

I won't offer any advice, but I'll just let you know that, in reading what you've written, it's like the words were coming directly from me. I know EXACTLY how you feel. I've been battling depression for many years as well. You're not alone.

I wish I had a solution for you. If that were the case, then I'd have the solution for me, too, and we'd both be fine.

Just keep doing your best, man, and try to keep being a good person. It's hard as hell, and it's that much harder that people generally don't understand those who suffer from depression.

If nothing else, you've got your friends on the WC Forum to turn to.

Cheers.

[ToyfareMark]

Aug 7, 2008 8:15:55 GMT -5 darthalexander said:

I've been doing the depression thing for over 20 years now and I know what it's like and how horrible it is. I find if people haven't experienced it themselves they can't really "appreciate" what it's like. Not to say they don't care, but unless you've lived it I find you really can't get just how god-awful it is.

I have done the medication thing, but for me all it did was "turn down the volume" of it. It was still there, just muted, and sometimes it would still come screaming back regardless of the meds.

One of the worst things about depression is that you are a prisoner of your own mind and it has a nasty habit of bringing up every damn horrible thing in your life over and over again. It's like it's a different person living inside you that takes a perverse pleasure in tormenting you over and over.

I'm not sure how extreme you are at this stage, but if you were like I was a couple of years ago you may have to go on medication, at least temporarily, to help ease the pain a bit.

Like villainy said, if you want to talk - PM me as well...trust me, I've been there so I know what it's like.

He nailed it right on the head. Thats what I go through. And thanks for the kind words from many of you.