Lick Ness Monster
Dennis Stamp
From the eerie, eerie depths of Lake Okabena
Posts: 4,874
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Post by Lick Ness Monster on Nov 28, 2009 22:08:29 GMT -5
Review time again, folks! This time, it's a heapin' helpin' of killer baby madness called IT'S ALIVE! IT'S ALIVE (2008) Directed by: Josef Rusnak Starring: Bijou Phillips, James Murray, and Owen Teale I'm sure everyone here is familiar with (if they don't remember it outright) the original 1974 version of IT'S ALIVE directed by Larry Cohen, with Sharon Farrell and John P. Ryan in the roles of the parents of a genetic monstrosity which gets loose in the hospital and wreaks unbelievable carnage on any and everyone who frightens or threatens it. In this new millennium update by director Josef Rusnak, we get the very lovely (and very willing to get naked) Bijou Phillips in the role of Lenore Harker. See, Lenore is a perky college student whose fling with an older architect named Frank Davis (James Murry) has left her pregnant and about to drop out of school to give birth. She plans on starting a new, perfect life with Frank, and returning to school as soon as her baby is old enough to allow her to do so. Right away we see that there's tension between Lenore and her roommate, who is not at all happy that Lenore has chosen to keep the baby and quit school, especially since Lenore is so close to getting her degree, graduating, AND getting a dissertation published. You know, girlfriend kinda DOES have a point. But I digress. Anyway, before you know it, Lenore has her things packed, and is arriving at Frank's house (which we're told that he built himself, a plot thread the film never does ANYTHING with, really). The hugely pregnant Lenore complains that she needs to freshen up after the long drive, and we get a shower scene where the movie's editors give us an unintentionally funny gaffe. See, when she had clothes on, Bijou Philips looked about to explode, she was so big. Nude and in the shower, she (or more than likely, her body double) looks MUCH less pregnant. We get alternating cuts of Bijou's breasts (which are indeed VERY nice to look at) and then shots of the stand in's belly...which goes on just long enough to be a continuity error before Lenore goes into early labor, and we're on our way to the hospital. Once there, it's not long before we get another pregnancy-themed movie cliche', that of the mother who knows something isn't right, yet whose doctors act as if she's not even talking to them. With the amount of times this gets used in pregnancy-themed horror films, you'd think most of these hospitals would be sued out of existence. Ah well. Lenore tries to tell the doctors that she feels something is wrong with the baby, and that they should stop her contractions...but they brush her aside and deliver the baby via C-section anyway. Big mistake, as little Daniel (that's the name that Lenore gives the monstrous little beast) comes into the world carrying a sack full of whoop ass that he unleashes on the entire delivery room. We don't see the slaughter, but after an intern drops by to check on how the delivery is going, we see the aftermath, and here is where either the movie is going to engage you, or lose you completely. See, the delivery room looks WORSE than the Nostromo did after the Alien went berserk and slaughtered everyone. Blood literally paints the observation windows, and is flooding the floor of the delivery room, and the only things alive on the other side of the door from the intern are Lenore and her baby. This newborn infant, at only MINUTES old, killed five adults in spectacularly bloody fashion, spraying gouts of claret onto every surface, and then had the strength to climb back onto his mother's belly and curl up like a little kitten. Hoooo-kay. But, since I knew what I was getting into with this film, I'm not going to crap on that aspect of the movie. You gotta suspend your disbelief and roll with the silly crap here, folks. And there's where the wheels come off. See, in this version of the film, things are played so straight, and for such dramatic effect, that the inherent silly nature of this movie clashes badly with the dour tone. I mean, you have a killer INFANT. The absurdity of that alone ought to be enough to tell you you have to inject some levity in there somewhere. Contrast this with Paul Solet's excellent GRACE, which had a baby that craved human flesh and blood, and whose MOTHER had to provide that somehow...and you see the stark difference. GRACE was a film that needed, and had, a serious tone. The baby wasn't stalking people, crawling around and killing. It was a film about how, much like old Fred Gwynne admonished us so many years ago, "sometimes dead is better". In IT'S ALIVE, we have the opposite side of that same coin. This is a movie that needed a comedic side a mile wide, and a sense of humor to match it's silly premise. Lacking that, we get scenes of Bijou Philips trying, and failing, to pull off Lifetime Network Movie of the Week levels of Postpartum Depression Mom character, and James Murray playing Oblivious Dad who hasn't clue one that his wife has...deteriorated mentally. See, it's not long after the Montana Delivery Room Massacre that Lenore and Frank bring baby Daniel home to meet his new uncle (Frank's brother Chris, a twelve year old who is an invalid after surviving a fire that claimed HIS family, and who lives with Frank.....FEEL THE FORESHADOWING!) and see his new home...and bizarre things start happening with the baby. For example, rats, birds and other wildlife (including the family cat) come up missing, and Chris gets skeeved out just looking at Lenore holding the baby. Which turns out to be all she really wants to do, for some reason. No one else can come near Daniel without Lenore becoming paranoid and upset, and she angrily shoos Chris away when he tries to peek in Daniel's crib to get a look at the baby. The film keeps Daniel's face hidden for most of the film until the climax, which I thought strange since we get a clear shot of this normal looking baby in the hospital scene. So again, it's a gaffe on the movie's part when we see the mutated, monstrous Daniel at the end and he looks NOTHING like the baby we saw in Lenore's arms at the hospital. You'd think someone might have noticed that in post production, eh? Anyway, as the film goes on (it's only 85 minutes, but it felt a lot longer to me) the officer investigating the Montana Delivery Room Massacre name Sgt. Perkins (played well by Owen Teale) targets Lenore since she's the only living witness to the crime that can testify what happened. He thinks (correctly) that she knows more than she's letting on. He wants to have her hypnotized so she can be properly questioned about the events of that day. Needless to say, Lenore has no desire to divulge what she knows. She doesn't want her freak of a baby taken away, and so she stonewalls Sgt. Perkins, and withdraws even more deeply into her own misery. The police's hypnotist decides at that point to make a private house call on Lenore, and he ends up meeting a grisly end at Daniel's tiny hands. Now, instead of a cat carcass, or a dead rat or bird, Lenore has a full grown dead human being on her hands to dispose of, which she does pretty readily, and without much obvious distress. Things aren't so easy when that same roommate from college named Marnie (and her boyfriend) show up on Lenore's doorstep. Marnie demands to know why calls, letters, and emails from not only her, but the Dean of the college are going unanswered. Lenore explodes on her friend, telling her off and kicking her out of the house. Marnie heads back to her car, and notices her boyfriend is not there waiting on her as he was told to do. By the way, I'm using the generic term "Boyfriend" because, really,he isn't a character, he's pretty much cannon fodder. Seems he went poking around back behind the house, and Daniel was lying in wait in the bed of an old pickup, buried under some tree branches. Again, the movie goes into over the top ridiculousness, and Daniel, despite being only weeks old, is strong enough to kill a full grown man, and THEN drag the carcass into the truck bed and bury it underneath the heavy branches. Anyways, eye-rolling aside, Marnie too investigates this truck, which is now covered in blood, and she too falls victim to the Toddling Terror in a spray of blood not seen since MACHINE GIRL. Lenore hears Marnie's scream this time, and runs outside to find the scene of absolute nastiness Daniel has created. So now she has two more bodies to dispose of, and this time they belong to her former friends. But she still won't go to the authorities with what she knows. Deeper into madness, depression, and despair she goes, until one night she confesses to Frank, in a fit of tears, that she tried to abort the baby early in her pregnancy, but the pills she ordered from the Internet (with roommate Marnie egging her on) didn't work, and only made her violently sick, after which time she decided to keep the baby. Two things here: 1) WOW. Your Baby-B-Gone that you ordered from the Internet DIDN'T work? Color me shocked. Girls this stupid really...really ought to be kept away from computers. I mean, I know it's not that far fetched to think that a girl who is young, scared, and pregnant might order some shady s*** from the net...but one that's about to graduate COLLEGE, and has taken medical courses? Come the hell on now. 2) So we're now supposed to believe that this woman who was not at all hesitant to chemically poison her unborn kid to death, having failed that, is averse to getting an actual abortion? Ummm....no. And beyond that, she was OK with having not KILLED this child, but potentially crippling/retarding/disfiguring it was jim dandy with her? See, this makes the Lenore character either totally despicable and irredeemable (as if her eagerness to cover up her son's murders hadn't already done that), or flat out stupid herself. YEESH. IT'S ALIVE had a lot of potential to be a campy, cheesy redux of a horror movie long forgotten. But that potential is squandered in an attempt to play it straight that fails miserably. {Spoiler}This movie ends with a house fire that kills both the little Frankenstein, and his crazy ass momma. After watching this film, I sort of wish they would have thrown it in the burning house too, and started from scratch with a sense of humor firmly in tow. ** (And the second star is for Bijou's nude shower scene. You earned that star for that one, girl. Too bad it wasn't a part of a better movie, or a more fun one.) That's got to be the funniest movie review I've read in a long time, and actually has me jazzed to see the movie for all the wrong reasons. Hell, I didn't even know that they were DOING a remake of It's Alive, let alone one played as super serial as this one appears to be.
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Post by Rorschach on Nov 29, 2009 2:31:38 GMT -5
No kidding, TR...and to make matters worse, it's a film whose villain has all the elements of a campy horror movie monster...yet this film plays that like a parable against abortion, trying to be so serious and solemn that it just drains all the fun out of watching it.
This is a film where the damn baby ought to have lured people in by doing what babies do best: look cute, innocent, and harmless. At that point, when the rube bends down to pick it up, THAT's when throats get slashed, bowels are ripped open, ect. And for the love of Pete...WHY'D they take the movie out of the hospital? That so severely limited the amount of kills/fun that could have been had with this movie, and limited the baby's hiding places (in terms of natural, logical hiding places, not dumbf*** logic bomb hiding places. ) I mean, right off the bat, you'd have one of the best scenes ever as the newborn monster baby crawls into the maternity ward and we get a baby POV shot as he crawls/climbs into one of the empty cribs and hides himself just as a nurse walks in....SUSPENSE! ACCEPT! NO! SUBSTITUTES! ;D
Seriously, that truck bed scene is the equivalent of the "shark in the ship" scene from JAWS THE REVENGE. A logic gap that rips you right out of the film, and makes you burst out laughing at the ridiculousness of the movie. Come to think of it, the blood gout as Daniel kills Marnie IS kind of akin to the Kintner boy's demise in the original JAWS.
And thinking of it even further, a campy coda for the baby (again, as a nod to JAWS) would have been AWESOME here. It just comes down to the fact that this should have been a super fun creature feature like the remake of PIRRHANA looks to be, NOT some super SRS meditation on abortion/postpartum depression.
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Post by DSR on Nov 29, 2009 5:58:44 GMT -5
No kidding, TR...and to make matters worse, it's a film whose villain has all the elements of a campy horror movie monster...yet this film plays that like a parable against abortion, trying to be so serious and solemn that it just drains all the fun out of watching it. This is a film where the damn baby ought to have lured people in by doing what babies do best: look cute, innocent, and harmless. At that point, when the rube bends down to pick it up, THAT's when throats get slashed, bowels are ripped open, ect. And for the love of Pete...WHY'D they take the movie out of the hospital? That so severely limited the amount of kills/fun that could have been had with this movie, and limited the baby's hiding places (in terms of natural, logical hiding places, not dumbf*** logic bomb hiding places. ) I mean, right off the bat, you'd have one of the best scenes ever as the newborn monster baby crawls into the maternity ward and we get a baby POV shot as he crawls/climbs into one of the empty cribs and hides himself just as a nurse walks in....SUSPENSE! ACCEPT! NO! SUBSTITUTES! ;D Seriously, that truck bed scene is the equivalent of the "shark in the ship" scene from JAWS THE REVENGE. A logic gap that rips you right out of the film, and makes you burst out laughing at the ridiculousness of the movie. Come to think of it, the blood gout as Daniel kills Marnie IS kind of akin to the Kintner boy's demise in the original JAWS. And thinking of it even further, a campy coda for the baby (again, as a nod to JAWS) would have been AWESOME here. It just comes down to the fact that this should have been a super fun creature feature like the remake of PIRRHANA looks to be, NOT some super SRS meditation on abortion/postpartum depression. As I recall, the original IT'S ALIVE (which I did review many a Horror Thread ago) had hints of black comedy, but they were subtle enough that one might not have noticed them. At any rate, I really don't have a problem with taking a mutant killer baby parable movie seriously, but that might be because, as I've stated before, realism doesn't appeal to me as much as surrealism. I may seek out this remake one of these days. Also, Bijou Phillips is totally yummy looking, so at the very least I've got that to look forward to.
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Lick Ness Monster
Dennis Stamp
From the eerie, eerie depths of Lake Okabena
Posts: 4,874
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Post by Lick Ness Monster on Nov 29, 2009 20:46:43 GMT -5
Also, Bijou Phillips is totally yummy looking, so at the very least I've got that to look forward to. I did enjoy Phillips quite a bit in the Wizard of Gore remake. Well, the month of November is almost over, which means only one thing...Christmas-themed horror. On the all-time Christmas horror movie rolodex, the original Black Christmas takes the #1 spot on my list, with the And All Through the House segment in the 1972 Tales From the Crypt film taking honorable mention. Of course, you can't go wrong with Silent Night, Deadly Night 1 and 2 for all the wrong reasons. Those will probably be the only horror movies I watch for a while, 'cus I've got the massive ultimate edition 007 box set to plow through since I've had the series on my mind recently (what with that overrated/underrated Bond thread currently going).
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andrew8798
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on 24/7 this month
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Post by andrew8798 on Nov 29, 2009 23:11:29 GMT -5
Nimrod Talks
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Post by tap on Nov 29, 2009 23:12:07 GMT -5
Okay, I'm not going to write up a full review on Antichrist, only because I want people to go into the film with no expectations whatsoever. I give the film 5 stars out of 5 and rank it as the best film I've seen this year. It's so over the top it's amazing. I wish more movies had the kind of guts this one does. I honestly think a lot of people here may hate it for the very reasons I love it, I dunno. But if you get the chance to watch it, please do!
Also watched The Signal last night, really good. 3.5 or 4 stars out of 5 (listening to the commentary now, rewatching the film will likely lower the rating.
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theryno665
Grimlock
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Post by theryno665 on Nov 29, 2009 23:56:11 GMT -5
I read a plot synopsis for Antichrist online somewhere and I don't think I could handle it. Keep in mind, I'll watch just about ANYTHING.
But I got a bulk of horror DVDs coming from my Black Friday online shopping. I got the 20th Anniversary Edition of Hellraiser, Behind The Mask and Midnight Meat Train on the way, none of which I've seen (yup, not even Hellraiser, at least not the whole thing in one sitting).
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Post by DSR on Nov 30, 2009 0:09:48 GMT -5
Also, Bijou Phillips is totally yummy looking, so at the very least I've got that to look forward to. I did enjoy Phillips quite a bit in the Wizard of Gore remake. Well, the month of November is almost over, which means only one thing...Christmas-themed horror. On the all-time Christmas horror movie rolodex, the original Black Christmas takes the #1 spot on my list, with the And All Through the House segment in the 1972 Tales From the Crypt film taking honorable mention. Of course, you can't go wrong with Silent Night, Deadly Night 1 and 2 for all the wrong reasons. Those will probably be the only horror movies I watch for a while, 'cus I've got the massive ultimate edition 007 box set to plow through since I've had the series on my mind recently (what with that overrated/underrated Bond thread currently going). Hey, great minds think alike! 1. My reference to Bijou Phillips's hotness was with Wizard of Gore in mind. 2. I've also been thinking of Christmas-themed horror. Like you, I've got BLACK CHRISTMAS and TALES FROM THE CRYPT. I don't have SILENT NIGHT DEADLY NIGHT, but I do have CHRISTMAS EVIL and SILENT NIGHT, BLOODY NIGHT. Maybe someone like TBS will play GREMLINS, too! (I also plan on watching BATMAN RETURNS, but that doesn't fit the criteria of horror.) 3. I'll probably also rifle through the James Bond series like I did around this time a year or two ago. I did find a copy of QUANTUM OF SOLACE for 3 bucks at my local Big Lots during their Black Friday sale. Now all I need is CASINO ROYALE, and I'll have them all. *thumbs up*
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Lick Ness Monster
Dennis Stamp
From the eerie, eerie depths of Lake Okabena
Posts: 4,874
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Post by Lick Ness Monster on Nov 30, 2009 21:16:57 GMT -5
Just got done re-watching One Missed Call, which I reviewed in one of these threads or another. And no, not the American remake, but the 2004 film directed by WC horror hall of fame inductee Takashi Miike. I actually liked it better the second time - the one thing that really popped out moreso with this viewing that didn't on the first take was just how good of a job the movie does making its hero and heroine sympathetic characters. And, of course, that ambiguous ending that's open to interpretation. I'd probably bump it up a half-star to *** 1/2 out of ****.
Which leaves me to ask the following - I'm fairly certain that I made some mention of the American remake in my little mini-review, though I'm not sure since I can't remember exactly where it was originally posted. Really, I'm just wondering if anyone here has actually SEEN the thing, because I haven't. By all accounts, I have yet to see anybody say a kind syllable toward it, and it ranked in at a very respectable #2 on RottenTomatoes in their "Worst-reviewed movies of the decade" list. So to any unfortunate souls who took this flick in - is it really as bad as it's made out to be?
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Post by YellowJacketY2J on Dec 1, 2009 7:16:04 GMT -5
When I viewed the trailer for Orphan, I immediately thought it was an Omen rip-off. It looked and sounded like The Omen. After viewing the movie itself, it's nothing like The Omen. Instead, it's more like The Good Son. Except it's not total crap. After a miscarriage, John (Peter Sarsgaard) and Kate (Vera Farmiga; and yes, their names are John and Kate, which I believe is a coincidence) decide to adopt. With the assistance of Sister Abigail (CCH Pounder), they adopt Esther (Isabelle Fuhrman), an intelligent and charming little girl. Despite some misunderstandings with her new siblings, Daniel (Jimmy Bennett) and Max (Aryana Engineer), everything seems to be going well. That is, until mysterious accidents start taking place, with Esther being present at each one. Accidents such as a local girl "slipping" and breaking her ankle, Kate's minivan going in reverse with Max in it, Daniel's treehouse catching on fire; the list goes on and on. Kate believes that Esther is responsible, but nobody else believes her. This is where the film shines. Esther's sinister and methodical methods are creepy, and her mind games with Kate are ominous. Each "accident" gets progressively more dangerous, which adds to the tension. It's slowly built up nicely by Jaume Collet-Serra, taking its sweet time to mess with your head. Isabelle Fuhrman is magnificent as Esther. One minute, she's cute and innocent, the next she's sinister and menacing. At times you like her, and even feel sorry for her (being bullied at school and by her brother, Daniel). Then she organizes her crimes, which makes you hate her (since none of the victims actions deserve such extreme punishments). Clocking in at 123 minutes, I had a feeling that Orphan would stumble (most horror movies that go past 90 minutes do). Surprisingly, it doesn't. Never once did I feel as if the film was dragging, instead feeling it was slowly building towards the finale. Which it does. The finale itself is good, but the twist is not. Though it's plausible and doesn't royally harm the film, I wasn't particularly fond of it. I felt the film was moving along perfectly, and didn't need a twist to garner a reaction. Regardless of the twist, I feel that the audience would've been talking about the film for days. Sadly, Jaume Collet-Serra didn't feel the same way. The twist aside, Orphan is a phenomenally well-filmed movie. It's mind games is puissant, making you question Esther's next moves. Collet-Serra doesn't rush the film, opting to slowly build each "accident" up. Kate is a great protagonist, giving you somebody to root for. Orphan may have looked like an Omen rip-off, but is its own chilling film. Final Rating: 90%
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Lick Ness Monster
Dennis Stamp
From the eerie, eerie depths of Lake Okabena
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Post by Lick Ness Monster on Dec 1, 2009 9:54:17 GMT -5
Damn. Everybody I have talked to (online or otherwise) about The Orphan says the same thing - it's awesome. I still haven't seen it, and really need to get around to rectifying that situation.
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Post by YellowJacketY2J on Dec 1, 2009 10:59:14 GMT -5
Damn. Everybody I have talked to (online or otherwise) about The Orphan says the same thing - it's awesome. I still haven't seen it, and really need to get around to rectifying that situation. I highly recommend you see it shortly. As I stated in my review, I didn't expect much. I was pleasantly surprised.
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Post by tap on Dec 1, 2009 22:11:32 GMT -5
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Post by YellowJacketY2J on Dec 2, 2009 8:07:55 GMT -5
Wrestlecrap Official ReviewBefore I start this review, let me state this: I know I'm late for viewing this. It's almost a week after Thanksgiving. In my defense, I was busy last week and I didn't find out about this movie until Thanksgiving day. Better late than never (or next year). ThanksKilling follows the story of a killer turkey coming back from the dead to feast on human flesh. Four college friends on Thanksgiving break become his prey, as do their families. TK doesn't take itself seriously. It has purposely outlandish scenes (such as a man attempting to f*** a turkey, the killer turkey f***ing a girl, a wife taking a shit in her husbands coffee and demanding a divorce, the college kids believing that the killer turkey is the one girl's father after he skins the fathers face and wears it as a mask (Leatherface would be proud)). This does make the film entertaining on a cheesy level. But, it also does feel forced sometimes. The kills are decent (stabbings, pecked to death, shooting). The turkey looks pretty good (by the way, it talks and makes a million one-liners). The acting is bad, but it seems intentional. Not meant to be taken seriously, ThanksKilling can be a fun film at times. Final Rating: 60%
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Lick Ness Monster
Dennis Stamp
From the eerie, eerie depths of Lake Okabena
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Post by Lick Ness Monster on Dec 2, 2009 11:20:17 GMT -5
Wrestlecrap Official ReviewBefore I start this review, let me state this: I know I'm late for viewing this. It's almost a week after Thanksgiving. In my defense, I was busy last week and I didn't find out about this movie until Thanksgiving day. Better late than never (or next year). ThanksKilling follows the story of a killer turkey coming back from the dead to feast on human flesh. Four college friends on Thanksgiving break become his prey, as do their families. TK doesn't take itself seriously. It has purposely outlandish scenes (such as a man attempting to f*** a turkey, the killer turkey f***ing a girl, a wife taking a s*** in her husbands coffee and demanding a divorce, the college kids believing that the killer turkey is the one girl's father after he skins the fathers face and wears it as a mask (Leatherface would be proud)). This does make the film entertaining on a cheesy level. But, it also does feel forced sometimes. The kills are decent (stabbings, pecked to death, shooting). The turkey looks pretty good (by the way, it talks and makes a million one-liners). The acting is bad, but it seems intentional. Not meant to be taken seriously, ThanksKilling can be a fun film at times. Final Rating: 60% HAHAHAHA! That is just golden. Looks like Thanksgiving finally has its definitive horror film, at least until they do a Grindhouse sequel (and that ain't happenin'). Also, I realize that this is completely off-topic, but I don't care - might as well say it here where I (maybe) won't get flamed to high heaven. I concur 1000% with your review of Star Trek linked in your sig, and it's awesome to see those thoughts from somebody else, because it truly seemed like I was the ONLY person on the internet who wasn't "OMG this was the best movie ever what a brilliant amazing transcendant piece of work this was five stars ." I mean, it was a decent flick and all, but COME ON...it's essentially just a typical popcorn movie that is executed better than most, and like yourself, I also zoned out on the film from time to time.
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Post by YellowJacketY2J on Dec 2, 2009 12:30:31 GMT -5
Wrestlecrap Official ReviewBefore I start this review, let me state this: I know I'm late for viewing this. It's almost a week after Thanksgiving. In my defense, I was busy last week and I didn't find out about this movie until Thanksgiving day. Better late than never (or next year). ThanksKilling follows the story of a killer turkey coming back from the dead to feast on human flesh. Four college friends on Thanksgiving break become his prey, as do their families. TK doesn't take itself seriously. It has purposely outlandish scenes (such as a man attempting to f*** a turkey, the killer turkey f***ing a girl, a wife taking a s*** in her husbands coffee and demanding a divorce, the college kids believing that the killer turkey is the one girl's father after he skins the fathers face and wears it as a mask (Leatherface would be proud)). This does make the film entertaining on a cheesy level. But, it also does feel forced sometimes. The kills are decent (stabbings, pecked to death, shooting). The turkey looks pretty good (by the way, it talks and makes a million one-liners). The acting is bad, but it seems intentional. Not meant to be taken seriously, ThanksKilling can be a fun film at times. Final Rating: 60% HAHAHAHA! That is just golden. Looks like Thanksgiving finally has its definitive horror film, at least until they do a Grindhouse sequel (and that ain't happenin'). Also, I realize that this is completely off-topic, but I don't care - might as well say it here where I (maybe) won't get flamed to high heaven. I concur 1000% with your review of Star Trek linked in your sig, and it's awesome to see those thoughts from somebody else, because it truly seemed like I was the ONLY person on the internet who wasn't "OMG this was the best movie ever what a brilliant amazing transcendant piece of work this was five stars ." I mean, it was a decent flick and all, but COME ON...it's essentially just a typical popcorn movie that is executed better than most, and like yourself, I also zoned out on the film from time to time. I'm glad to see somebody who agrees with me on Star Trek. I was expecting tons of heat for it (which I have yet to receive).
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Post by Rorschach on Dec 2, 2009 17:25:58 GMT -5
Damn. Everybody I have talked to (online or otherwise) about The Orphan says the same thing - it's awesome. I still haven't seen it, and really need to get around to rectifying that situation. A lot of people, myself included, missed the boat on this theatrically. But ORPHAN is definitely worth seeing, and is a damn fine horror movie. In regards to STAR TREK, I guess that makes three of us who didn't drink the Kool Aid, eh TR?
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The Ichi
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Post by The Ichi on Dec 2, 2009 18:14:33 GMT -5
Wrestlecrap Official ReviewBefore I start this review, let me state this: I know I'm late for viewing this. It's almost a week after Thanksgiving. In my defense, I was busy last week and I didn't find out about this movie until Thanksgiving day. Better late than never (or next year). ThanksKilling follows the story of a killer turkey coming back from the dead to feast on human flesh. Four college friends on Thanksgiving break become his prey, as do their families. TK doesn't take itself seriously. It has purposely outlandish scenes (such as a man attempting to f*** a turkey, the killer turkey f***ing a girl, a wife taking a s*** in her husbands coffee and demanding a divorce, the college kids believing that the killer turkey is the one girl's father after he skins the fathers face and wears it as a mask (Leatherface would be proud)). This does make the film entertaining on a cheesy level. But, it also does feel forced sometimes. The kills are decent (stabbings, pecked to death, shooting). The turkey looks pretty good (by the way, it talks and makes a million one-liners). The acting is bad, but it seems intentional. Not meant to be taken seriously, ThanksKilling can be a fun film at times. Final Rating: 60% That turkey looks like someone straight out of "The Dark Crystal". For that reason alone I'll probably go see this movie.
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theryno665
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Post by theryno665 on Dec 2, 2009 18:59:06 GMT -5
ThanksKilling looks (and sounds, from the tone of the review) like a Troma movie. I may just have to give that one a shot.
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Post by Mehe is F'n hardcore. on Dec 2, 2009 19:13:46 GMT -5
What are your thoughts on Silent Night Deadly Night? I'm watching it now, and digging it.
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