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Post by The Tank on Oct 14, 2011 14:13:50 GMT -5
Put her with Italian Shiima Xion, then.
Makes about as much sense as Shiima Xion being Italian.
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Oak: Certified Jade Hater
Bill S. Preston, Esq.
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Post by Oak: Certified Jade Hater on Oct 14, 2011 15:09:04 GMT -5
Put her with Italian Shiima Xion, then. Makes about as much sense as Shiima Xion being Italian. Fun fact: In his promo, Shiima Xion was supposed to mention why he has an Italian last name. Then I realized the promo would be too long and cut it. Though I might know a way to fix it. Yeah.... I think I can fix it.
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Post by Perpetual Nirvana on Oct 14, 2011 16:02:48 GMT -5
Tenay: Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to Impact. We are coming off a shocking turn of events at Bound For Glory. West: Yeah, we got a new world champion in Sting but I don’t think anyone could have foreseen the circumstances under which he won the title. Tenay: But first we can hear from the founder of TNA Wrestling, the King of the Mountain, Jeff Jarrett.
Jeff Jarrett comes to the ring.
Ladies and gentlemen, if you'll excuse me I need to take a minute of your time for some issues I need to address.
First, I need to talk about the Knockouts division. Now since Daffney has been reinstated to the roster, though I must make it clear at Mickie James request, some of the ladies have expressed a concern at an unsafe work enviroment. In fact Brooke Adams was so afraid that she refused to interview Daffney or Taylor and in fact quit her interviewer job altogether. But let me assure you ladies that while I understand your concerns, we will do our upmost to make sure things are handled. In fact I am so confident of this that I am appointing my own wife Karen to be my official liason to the Knockouts division. If any of you ladies have any comments or concerns they you go to her and she will bring the matter to my attention.
Next, the Legends division. First of all I want to congratulate Tommy Dreamer on his win at Bound For Glory. But after Eric Young's win over Phil Shatter, I granted him a title match of his choice. And he seemed to be particularly interested in the Legends title. So next week on Impact, Eric Young will take on Tommy "Crimson" Mercer with the winner facing you for the Legends title at Turning Point.
Now I want to take a moment to congratulate my friends AJ Styles and Christopher Daniels on winning the tag team titles for a third time. But whole you two get to enjoy it, I've had Beer Money and Ric Flair complaining non-stop since Bound For Glory. So next week I am granting Beer Money their rematch for the tag team titles. That's right, a Bound For Glory rematch right here on Impact.
In regards to the X Division I have two announcements to make. Now I watched the Steel Asylum match at Bound For Glory very intently. And three men, other than the champion Brian Kendrick, really impressed me. So these three men will meet next week in a triple threat to determine who will challenge Kendrick at Turning Point. It will be Austin Aries v Miguel Cesaro v Jesse Sorensen. Good luck gentlemen.
My other announcment is that after the success of the Knocked Out special, Spike TV has granted us another special, this time centered around the X Division. This special will feature X Division stars both past and present and is due to air toward the end of November. More details will be released as they become avalible.
Finally, in regards to the world championship...
*Samoa Joe walks out with a mic in hand and unbridled fury in his eyes, locked on Jeff Jarrett.*
Joe, I...
SHUT UP!!!
*Joe slides into the ring, Jarrett raises his mic again and Joe slams it out of his hand!!!*
I said shut up. You're lucky I'm even letting you talk to me face to face, because after last week, you don't deserve it.
Ignoring the fact that it cost me MY WORLD TITLE, you let the main event of Bound for Glory, the main event of our biggest show of the year, end like that? You honestly let it end like that.
I'm gonna say this one time, Jeff. One. Time. I don't care if you give me a rematch at Sting, I don't care if you give me D'Angelo Dinero, I don't care if you give Vince Russo an assault rifle and a ten minute head start.
MAKE! THIS!! RIGHT!!!
Look, I know you're mad but I'm pretty sure you'll agree that there's no point going after Sting while he has Dinero to watch his back. So how about you do something about that first? You against Dinero at Turning Point.
.........done.
*Jarrett extends a hand to Joe, Joe looks down at it, back up to Jarrett, and turns away to leave the ring.*
Well, I guess that leaves us the question of who Sting's next challenger will be. Mr Anderson would seem to be the obvious choice since he beat Brutus Magnus at Bound For Glory. However I can't help but feel Rob Van Dam would have beaten D'Angelo Dinero if not for Dinero taking a cheap shot. Therefor these two men will meet next week in a #1 contenders match. But for tonight they are tag partners.
Thanks you for your time, ladies and gentlemen. And enjoy the show.
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Post by Perpetual Nirvana on Oct 14, 2011 16:05:30 GMT -5
Cut the music.
So, what can I say? I have finally done it guys, I survived 14 other men, beat Tommy Mercer in the middle of the ring, and now I am the Legends Champion. Now, I have bigger plans in mind, like trying to go after The World Title, but I know that others deserve more of a chance then I do....Besides, this championship means the world to me right now.
He holds the title up as the audience cheers
Now, as a champion....I must be ready to defend this title with honor....and as Turning Point is coming soon, I would love to know who is the number #1 contender is...and I want to know now....
*Eric Young makes his way to the ring*
Hey Tommy.
Much like you, I also had an amazing battle at Bound For Glory. I impressed a lot of people, particularly Jeff Jarrett. After the show Jeff comes to me and he says that I earned a title match after a performance like that, and that I can choose which title, X-Division or Legends, that I want to go after. And after some brief thoughts I chose your belt.
Not out of disrespect, I respect the hell out of you, but because I have never held the Legends Championship. I've gotten some time as X-Division Champ, and even though I loved every second with it, it feels like that was the old me. After progressing so much, I feel, and a lot of my fans feel, I shouldn't be going back to the same old same old.
So I chose to face you at Turning Point. And I won't lie, I'm excited. Getting to go one on one with one of the greats in the business. Its like a dream come true. But that belt you're holding. . .
*Young points to the Legend's title in Dreamer's hand*
...winning that would also be a dream come true.
Dreamer laughs a little
I don't mean any disrespect Eric, but you havn't done anything to prove you deserve a shot at my belt. You had a hell of a battle in the cage, and yet....you didn't prove to me you deserve gold. I am not objecting to the match because I remember when I was in your shoes as a youngster...but I need to see more fire in your eyes, I want to see that you have what it takes to try and take this....
Points to the title
....Out of my possession. Because as long as i'm standing, I will not let this out of my grip.
Trust me when I say I wouldn't have it any other way.
Everyday of my life, I make it my goal to convince people that I do deserve a shot. That I should not be written off. That I'm not the young kid anymore. Thats the old me. Thats back when I was comedic, and viewed as a joke. After the blood feud I just had with Shatter, there shouldn't be any doubt in anybody's mind that I am a dangerous man.
I'm glad you have no objections, because I'm ready, Dreamer. I'm ready for the next step of my professional career. To step up and win the Legend's Championship! And NOBODY, even a living legend like yourself, is going to stand in my way.
You witnessed my Bound for Glory match, and I caught yours, and we both saw how deadly each other can be. To say I'm not excited about getting to step in the ring with you at Turning Point would be a complete and utter lie. When me and you face, it will be a match up for the ages. One of current greatest vs the star of the future. That may seem like a bold claim, but I'm dead-set on proving it true. I'll prove myself to everybody, including you. Everybody knows I'm gonna be giving this match everything I got, and there never been an instance where you haven't given 100%, so when we face each other, it'll be amazing. Unforgettable. . .
Just to make it perfectly clear, if its not already instantly obvious, I have a lot of respect for you, Dreamer. You're a legend in this business and still one of the greats today. But when the ref's hand hits the mat for the three count, I guarantee you that it won't be my shoulders on the ground. I'll leave my heart and soul on the mat. Anything to get the respect of my peers in the back, especially you. That... and the gold that you, and I, both hold so dear.
As for tonight... me and you take on the Lake Erie Monsters. And I know that we both want us to come out victorious, so I say, for tonight, we be smart, we work like a team, and we don't let any petty CENSORED stop us from getting the win.
JB: The following contest is scheduled for one fall. Introducing first, from Nashville, Tennessee, weighing 225 pounds, Eric Young! And his partner, from Yonkers, New York, weighing 260 pounds, he is the NEW TNA Legends Champion, Tommy Dreamer!
JB: And their opponents, at a combined weight of 431 pounds, Petey Williams and Tommy “Crimson” Mercer, the Lake Erie Monsters!
Tommy Dreamer and Eric Young v Lake Erie Monsters 3 votes 10 minutes
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Post by Deleted on Oct 14, 2011 16:09:55 GMT -5
Dreamer with a DDT on Petey Williams... I'm gonna miss Petey
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Oak: Certified Jade Hater
Bill S. Preston, Esq.
Edgier than Wayne Brady, Harder than Chinese Arithmetic, and Higher than the ratings for Blade: The Series
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Post by Oak: Certified Jade Hater on Oct 14, 2011 16:10:04 GMT -5
Dreamer and Young hit stereo DVD's on Crimson.
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Oak: Certified Jade Hater
Bill S. Preston, Esq.
Edgier than Wayne Brady, Harder than Chinese Arithmetic, and Higher than the ratings for Blade: The Series
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Post by Oak: Certified Jade Hater on Oct 14, 2011 16:11:54 GMT -5
Dreamer with a DDT on Petey Williams... I'm gonna miss Petey NEVER FORGET PETEY WILLIAMS!
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Post by Perpetual Nirvana on Oct 14, 2011 16:17:58 GMT -5
Young takes Williams down with a dropkick then lifts him up for the DVD. Mercer comes in but is cut off by Dreamer who scoops him up andhits the Spicolli driver at the same time as Young hits the DVD!
1…
2…
3!
JB: Here are your winners, Eric Young and Tommy “Crimson” Mercer!
Tenay: Well there we have it, Young and Dreamer pick up the win. West: Well they could be opponents at Turning Point if Young beats Mercer next week. Tenay: Well now we can go backstage to Austin Aries.
So, A Double failed to get the job done last week. And now I'm being punished with tonight's match. Well, them's the breaks. Not like I won't be able to get things done tonight against Scat Hardy. I mean, the guy's not exactly at the prime of his career. And even when he was at the prime of his career, comparing him to The Greatest Man That Ever Lived is like comparing a cougar to a pig. A large pig. A very, very large pig. Which is kind of obvious. There's a reason Fatt Hardy is known as the lesser of the Hardy duo.
But really, The Starr of TNA has much better things to do than take on Ratt Hardy. Brian Kendrick got his first taste of Austin Aries on Friday, and he knows he only beat me because there were like twelve other guys in the ring. I put him out of mind and focused on making a good impression for myself. Maybe not the best choice, but hey, I'm arrogant like that. But now, now all eyes are on Brian Kendrick. After keeping the title through a match like that, he should be unstoppable. But again, twelve guys in the ring. Everyone's watching their back on all sides, and Kendrick got lucky. In a one-on-one match, it all comes down to who's the better man.
And it's not like I'm exaggerating when I say I'm The Greatest Man That Ever Lived. I am better than any other man on the roster, so of course I'm better than Brian Kendrick. And I'm definitely better than...than...damn, I've run out of derogatory insults that rhyme with Matt. Then again, just being Matt Hardy is insult enough, isn't it? I'm wasting my time ripping on him. So, uh...I'll just sum things up. Brian Kendrick? Goin' down. Matt Hardy? Sucks. Also goin' down. X Division Title? Comin' to me. Then...then things really kick into gear.
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Post by Perpetual Nirvana on Oct 14, 2011 16:21:31 GMT -5
JB: Introducing first, from Cameron, North Carolina, weighing 236 pounds, Matt Hardy!
JB: And his opponent, from Milwaukee, Wisconsin, weighing 210 pounds, Austin Aries!
Tenay: Well we learned earlier Austin Aries will be one of three men vying for a X Division title shot next week. West: I’m telling you. Next X Division Champion right there.
Austin Aries v Matt Hardy 3 votes 10 minutes
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Post by Deleted on Oct 14, 2011 16:23:01 GMT -5
Austin Aries with a Hwist of Tate
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Oak: Certified Jade Hater
Bill S. Preston, Esq.
Edgier than Wayne Brady, Harder than Chinese Arithmetic, and Higher than the ratings for Blade: The Series
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Post by Oak: Certified Jade Hater on Oct 14, 2011 16:26:50 GMT -5
Aries with the Last Chancery
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Post by The Tank on Oct 14, 2011 16:26:54 GMT -5
A Double with a discus clothesline. Aries with the Last Chancery Oh, call it the Horns of Aries. Because seriously...Last Chancery, what the hell does that even mean?
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Post by Perpetual Nirvana on Oct 14, 2011 16:31:02 GMT -5
Aries counters the Twist of Fate into a Brainbuster then follows up with a 450 splash! 1… 2… 3! JB: Here is your winner, Austin Aries! West: Next X Division Champion right there. Tenay: Yeah, you said that. First he has to get past Cesaro and Sorensen who we’ll see in action later on. *Traci and Lacey are shown in the back.* Ya know Lacey, I'm beginning to think that the management here in TNA just isn't that smart. I mean, we as a company are trying to become legitamate competition for that other company up north. But the methods they use to try to do so are perplexing to say the least.
First, we'll start with the reason I began to ponder this point. You and I, Lacey. Leather n' Lace. The 'odd couple' of the women's division. In everyone's mind, noone thought we could succeed. We proved everyone wrong, and became Women's Tag Team Champions and holding the titles nearly a full year. We became the face of the Women's Tag Division. But some say that the division really lost steam during our reign. Some say that we were so dominate that noone dared to try to even try to take the belts from us.
But looking back over the last year, I began to notice something. We defeated Sarita and 'Winter' back in January to retain these belts. We then defeat them again in July to once again retain the belts. Then when we should have been given a proper rematch against ODB and Lisa Marie... who was there once again? That's right. Sarita and Katy Lee. For some reason they thought it was a good idea to keep putting these two in title matches, when it was obvious that they did not need to be there. Not very smart if you ask me.
And who comes up with an idea of two four corner matches to determine a tag team that will compete for the Women's Tag Team Titles? I mean, really. Are they even trying?What a wall of text!Wall of what? I'm talking here! Not writing!Oh... right.Now shut up, I'm not finished.You're not? But one example does not prove anything, so I had to look at the Men's titles. And I ask you why was it for for months that a rookie was the "Legends" Champion? If you want everyone to compete for the belt that is fine. But to do so and keep it named the "Legends" belt is just going to confuse the morons out there. And as dumb as some people are, they are the ones paying the bills so you need to make sure they aren't in that state of confusion.
Now to the Men's Tag Champions. Why is it that management thought it was a good idea to have the World Tag Team champions defend the belts on free TV? And who thought it was a good idea to allow women to compete for the belts? And then after the women won the match, who thought it would be a good idea to try to wipe out the victory from the title history page and list it as 'vacant' when the world knows what really happened? These are not the moves of intelligent people.
So if they want to compete with that other company, why do they continue to make such silly moves? And why does TNA keep these stupid people in charge? If only they had someone intelligent running things, the state of the company could be so much better... hmmmm.... Are you thinking what I'm thinking Lacey?I think so Traci, I'll go get the Tylenol.What?Your making that face again. Every time I make that face, I get a headache.Its called deep in thought, Lacey.I know. *Hands Traci a bottle.* *Traci throws the bottle to the ground.* No Lacey, last week we found out that I am a super genius. And I believe that is exactly what this show is missing. *Turns to leave* Come Lacey, we must plan for next week.Why? What are we doing next week. *Whipping back around and gets a serious look on her face.* We are going to try to take over the show! *Fade to black*
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Oak: Certified Jade Hater
Bill S. Preston, Esq.
Edgier than Wayne Brady, Harder than Chinese Arithmetic, and Higher than the ratings for Blade: The Series
TOP ROPE CATCH A VIBE YEAH I SWERVE WHEN I DRIVE
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Post by Oak: Certified Jade Hater on Oct 14, 2011 16:32:20 GMT -5
They're Traci, They're Traci and the Lace, Lace, Lace, Lace, NARF!
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Post by Deleted on Oct 14, 2011 16:34:53 GMT -5
They're Traci, They're Traci and the Lace, Lace, Lace, Lace, NARF! OK, this is only going to make me love Leather and Lace even more than I already do.
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Post by The Tank on Oct 14, 2011 16:35:21 GMT -5
I think I see where SnS is going with this gimmick, but where are they gonna get that much string cheese?
...I tried to adapt that joke without someone giving me a setup. Maybe not the best, but I think it works.
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Post by Perpetual Nirvana on Oct 14, 2011 16:36:59 GMT -5
*Velvet is shown on her way to the ring.*
Maybe Angelina finally got the hint and will leave me alone now. If she can't succeed on her own, maybe its time she found herself a man and settled down.
As for my opponent here tonight. Heh. I know you are a former Women's Champion and best 'buds' with the current champion. But to me, you are just a roadblock standing in my way. And what do you do to roadblocks when they stand in the way of your dreams?
*Velvet pounds her fist into her hand.* You smash through them.
*Velvet steps through the curtain as her music hits*
JB: The following contest is scheduled for one fall. Introducing first, from the Big Apple, Velvet Sky!
JB: And her opponent, accompanied by Katy Nikita Lee, from Mexico City, Sarita!
Tenay: Well Velvet Sky is still trying to prove herself as a singles competitor. West: Yeah, good luck with that. Tenay: Sarita is also looking for a win here as her and Katy Lee try to get back in the title picture.
Velvet Sky v Sarita 3 votes 10 minutes
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Gus Richlen Was Wrong
Patti Mayonnaise
Metal Maestro: Co-winner of the FAN Idol Throwdown!
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Post by Gus Richlen Was Wrong on Oct 14, 2011 16:38:41 GMT -5
Velvet with a ZORTacarana
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Post by The Tank on Oct 14, 2011 16:38:59 GMT -5
Velvet Sky with a Lou Thesz Press.
...what can I say? I saw that thread in the TNA forum that said Vel Vel's turning into Stone Cold, and I think we should run with it here.
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Post by Deleted on Oct 14, 2011 16:39:48 GMT -5
Velvet Sky NARFS Sarita in the face.... ....Take that for what you will
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