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Post by TheVoiceofReason on Dec 29, 2011 2:25:09 GMT -5
painted pink, disco blaring.
"ARE YOU READY TO SEE A TRANSFORMED MAN!??!" Simmons screams.
The audience is going wild. Security is having a difficult time overall keeping them under control.
"After seeing Taker falling apart from his match last year at Wrestlemania 27, I decided to take him under my wing and get him back in tip-tip form. LET'S BRING HIM OUT."
Out comes Taker to a disco-house remix of the song Rollin', wearing an attire that Richard Simmons selected specially for him.
"Any words deadman?" Simmons asks.
"Yes, actually." Taker replies. "From now on, you will hereby refer to me as the FitTaker, because at this point in my life, I'm more fit than I've ever been, and I owe it all to Richard Simmons. Fitness Guru, celebrity, and just recently, my new manager. *rolls eyes back into head as thunder is heard, followed by chirping birds and the sound of a flowing stream* We will both make sure that whoever tries to challenge and assert that they're more fit than I am, well, I will make them...
REST. IN. SWEAT." *disco-house Rollin' plays; Taker high-fives Richard Simmons and carries him backstage.*
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Krazee
Salacious Crumb
Posts: 71,547 
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Post by Krazee on Dec 29, 2011 2:26:28 GMT -5
here we go again lol
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Rican
Bill S. Preston, Esq.
July 17, 2011 - HHHe called it
Posts: 16,460
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Post by Rican on Dec 29, 2011 2:26:32 GMT -5
I have no idea why, but these threads crack me up every single time.
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Krazee
Salacious Crumb
Posts: 71,547
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Post by Krazee on Dec 29, 2011 2:27:10 GMT -5
these threads always put a smile to my face
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Post by flatsdomino on Dec 29, 2011 2:35:00 GMT -5
You could have booked Simmons more prominently. If you did that the way it is, the crowd really has no reason to stay interested in the angle beyond the initial segment. That's just poor booking. Boom, you gave everyone what they wanted, the end. There's no interest there. People say Russo's writing is bad because he fires on all cylinders at all times so the story is constantly trying to get crazier and it ends up just getting stupid, but this approach is just as bad. Worst of all, you gave 'Taker way more mic time than Simmons, when Simmons is the reason the whole angle got over in the first place. That's the problem with WWE today, in a nutshell.
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Post by TheVoiceofReason on Dec 29, 2011 2:49:26 GMT -5
You could have booked Simmons more prominently. If you did that the way it is, the crowd really has no reason to stay interested in the angle beyond the initial segment. That's just poor booking. Boom, you gave everyone what they wanted, the end. There's no interest there. People say Russo's writing is bad because he fires on all cylinders at all times so the story is constantly trying to get crazier and it ends up just getting stupid, but this approach is just as bad. Worst of all, you gave 'Taker way more mic time than Simmons, when Simmons is the reason the whole angle got over in the first place. That's the problem with WWE today, in a nutshell. Simmons does need more mic-time, definitely. I'll keep this in mind next topic. |
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Post by Brother Nero....Wolfe on Dec 29, 2011 2:53:27 GMT -5
I have no idea why, but these threads crack me up every single time. Same here. It's like the "Cody Rhodes is about to be released" thread, except it's way more hilarious. |
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Post by corndog on Dec 29, 2011 3:15:18 GMT -5
On the next Raw Richard Simmons has an emotional sitdown with Mark Henry.
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Post by TheVoiceofReason on Dec 29, 2011 3:16:39 GMT -5
On the next Raw Richard Simmons has an emotional sitdown with Mark Henry. A weight loss angle perhaps?! It's genius; I love it! You may have just provided me with an idea for my next thread. |
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Post by The Beast Disincarnate on Dec 29, 2011 5:59:50 GMT -5
Richard Simmons should manage Jim Ross. He would constantly berate him and force him to exercise in the middle of the ring wearing a thong while Michael Cole would rap. They would be given 30 minutes of air time every single week to develop the angle.
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Post by I *still* ✡ Johnny on Dec 29, 2011 6:58:23 GMT -5
Sadly, Richard Simmons is getting nukuler heetz backstage and is soon to be released.
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Squirrel Master
Hank Scorpio
"Then the Squirrel Master came out of left field and told me I'm his bitch!"
Posts: 6,637
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Post by Squirrel Master on Dec 29, 2011 13:20:11 GMT -5
Richard Simmons missed the bus back in WCW, would've been great as a manager for Kwee Wee.  |
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Post by flatsdomino on Dec 29, 2011 13:22:23 GMT -5
Richard Simmons missed the bus back in WCW, would've been great as a manager for Kwee Wee. That's Sharmell, right? |
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Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
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Post by Deleted on Dec 29, 2011 13:25:01 GMT -5
Meanwhile, back on Earth...
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Yami Daimao
Patti Mayonnaise
Really, really wants to zigazig ah!
Posts: 31,784
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Post by Yami Daimao on Dec 29, 2011 13:37:50 GMT -5
...
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Post by Lazy peon on Dec 29, 2011 14:16:59 GMT -5
In reality, this is the type of thing I would hate and love at the same time.
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Post by Bang Bang Bart on Dec 29, 2011 14:25:40 GMT -5
Good God, this thread is f***ing hilarious.  |
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Squirrel Master
Hank Scorpio
"Then the Squirrel Master came out of left field and told me I'm his bitch!"
Posts: 6,637
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Post by Squirrel Master on Dec 29, 2011 16:35:16 GMT -5
Picture our boy as a heel manager: "These are The Dicks! What don't you understand?!"  |
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Post by Djm Doesn't Find You Funny on Dec 29, 2011 16:45:07 GMT -5
What's that about a transformed man?  |
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