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Post by GuyOfOwnage on Sept 1, 2015 20:07:22 GMT -5
I think you'll really enjoy that set, TR. Well worth the price of admission and a great set to have around for Halloween season.
So, I've recently been made aware of a recent vampire comedy by the name of What We Do In The Shadows. Has anyone here seen it? Is it worth my time to track down a copy?
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Post by 'Foretold' Joker on Sept 2, 2015 9:42:27 GMT -5
Ok has anyine seen this trailer? It's for a film called Grabbers It looks like a lot of fun, in a monsters attack a town film kind of way. I don't think I watched this trailer way back when, but the flick looks fun. Anybody actually check it out? I did buy it, but have yet to watch it. As we are approaching the month of ghouls I may get around to viewing it. That reminds me to start setting up my now annual Halloween month playlist
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Post by Jumpin' Jesse Walsh on Sept 5, 2015 15:27:41 GMT -5
I'm currently watching the '80s slasher flick Night Warning. It's totally batshit, disgusting, hilarious, and violent all at once. Anyone else seen it?
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Lick Ness Monster
Dennis Stamp
From the eerie, eerie depths of Lake Okabena
Posts: 4,874
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Post by Lick Ness Monster on Sept 7, 2015 14:40:00 GMT -5
I'm currently watching the '80s slasher flick Night Warning. It's totally batshit, disgusting, hilarious, and violent all at once. Anyone else seen it? Can't say that I have, although I remember seeing that particular VHS tape on the shelf of my oft-mentioned Greatest Video Store Ever. With that, time for a new review. 1978 Directed by George A. Romero Starring David Emge, Ken Foree, Scott Reiniger and Gaylen Ross Yes, folks, I'm reviewing a zombie movie. For my legion of (four) fans...I'm not happy about it either, but here goes. The original 1978 Dawn of the Dead is one of those movies that critics the world over lose their contents for. Hell, Roger Ebert gave it four stars, and he hated horror movies. I'm going to try to curb my snark as much as possible for this review, so the short version is this: I agree with the critics...to an extent. That other extent is hyperbole for reasons that I won't get into. Nonetheless, this is DEFINITELY the second-best movie in Romero's trilogy that now consists of no less than six movies that I'm aware of. Whoops, snark alert. #1 on that list, by the way, would be that black-and-white original, the only flick in the series that I actually feel the urge to re-watch every now and then. The raw numbers speak for themselves, though: $1.5 million budget, $55 million gross. Modern-day film producers, take note - you can spend less than the GDP of a small country and make your film seem big, grand and epic. Even more amazingly, it can be accomplished without CGI. Just Tom Savini and a whole heap o' fake blood and makeup. That's good stuff there, kids. With that, let's get to the show. If you'll recall, the first movie (which was inducted into my Registry of horror movies back when I had that dealio going on) was all about confinement. Small group of survivors at a farmhouse, hordes of attacking zombies, dead girl in the basement...family fun all around. This one takes that concept to a much grander scale. The unknown epidemic causing the recently deceased to rise from their graves and spread their disease via Komodo Dragon-esque mouth bites has hit the country, and the zombies have begun to overtake the cities. You know, one thing I have NEVER understood about Romero's movies is how the zombie side seems to be WINNING. I mean, we see survivors mow down these undead denizens with machine guns with plenty of aplomb, and yet, we're constantly told that we're at Skynet-esque extinction's door. But I digress. The movie gets its introductory segment out of the way quickly. Two SWAT officers in charge of fighting the zombie hordes are your resident badasses - Peter (Ken Foree, in probably my favorite performance in the entire series) and Roger (Scott Reiniger). These guys provide the needed gunfire and combat skills that the plot will need later, but I've also gotta say that they're pretty likable people. You know what, so are the movie's primary romantic couple. TV staff member Stephen Andrews (David Emge) and his girlfriend Francine (Gaylen Ross) have a plot to survive the oncoming zombie apocalypse that threatens Philadelphia: steal a helicopter and make off for the suburbs. After some initial zombie-shooting action, Peter and Roger find themselves stowing away. The chosen landing site, and where the movie will house its action for the remainder of the running time, is the rooftop of a shopping mall. This is where every critic just creams themselves, as there are supposedly all these allegorical themes that can be had from the chosen setting. But you don't come to Lick Ness Monster's Horror Movie Mayhem for that sort of analysis, and besides, I could swear that I once read an interview with Romero that he only chose the setting because it made sense as a place for the survivors to have supplies anyway. What can't be debated is that it IS a pretty nifty little setup. With the zombies barricaded either outside or on the first floor, our four survivors make the upper levels of the mall their de facto apartments. The script does a very admirable job making each character sympathetic in their own way, and the action sequences have the benefit of an amazing score by Goblin - the same band that did the music for several of Dario Argento's masterpieces. We even get some pretty good dramatic developments. During the course of the cleanup, Roger is bitten by one of the zombies and infected, while Francine reveals that she is pregnant. In this regard, this flick is WAY more enjoyable than the original, where I wanted to choke the life out of every character with the exception of Ben. Where it ISN'T as good is the suspense department. We spend a LOT of time with these characters in the middle portions of the movie. Francine takes flying lessons, Ben watches as his friend gradually succumbs to the zombie disease. It's a weird conundrum. Usually I'm all for more development, and the development we get here is good stuff but it kind of knocks the movie's momentum off in the middle when it comes to the scary factor. And then the bikers show up. The third trimester of this movie involves a fight between our camp of survivors and another, Cobra organization group of biker survivors who want the safety and comfort of the shopping mall all for themselves. For me, this is where the momentum takes a bigger downturn. The waning period of the movie is predictable, but not in the way that I usually like. And yeah, that is a bullshit blanket statement and I fully admit to it, because I honestly don't know what I would have done differently were I writing the damn script. So who knows, maybe I'm just a moron. Although I do VERY much enjoy the final minute or so, with Peter's overzealous rampage of doom. The first time I saw this movie, that scene got rewound no less than ten times. Hilarity to an Eddie Murphy level. Anyway...time to tote everything up. Folks, I DO like this movie, but not enough or in the way that I ever want to really watch it again. It's not a particularly enjoyable movie, although that can be said for some of the best horror movies of all time. Audition comes to mind off the top of my head as far as movies that fit this description. And...yeah, my zombie movie bias is starting to creep in again, I can't deny it. I very much enjoy the beginning and middle of Dawn of the Dead, as well as the characters and the setting that the movie quickly calls home. But I do think that the flick flies off the rails a bit once the other characters show up. Oh, and Savini...awesome stuff on the makeup FX side, but that's almost such a given that it borders on mind-numbingly redundant. *** out of ****. Every horror fan should check it out once during their lifetime. Whether or not you want to peruse it more is probably up to your personal tastes. And it's loads better than the 2004 Zack Snyder remake, where the director claims that he invented fast zombies, characters that are nowhere near as likable and that stupid pregnancy/zombie baby storyline.
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Post by 'Foretold' Joker on Sept 8, 2015 11:15:48 GMT -5
Last year I started my October horror-a-thon with Gingerdead Man are there any other hokey 60minute films I could start with this year?
Key being the film is about 60-70 minutes.
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Post by DSR on Sept 9, 2015 0:54:14 GMT -5
Taking a massive detour from the Universal Classics (I should probably review at least one, since I've been talking them up a ton...eh, maybe one of these days), I literally just heard about THE EDITOR (2014) a Canadian parody/love letter to the Italian Gialli of the 70s (like DEEP RED). www.shoutfactory.com/film/film-comedy/the-editorThis looks AWESOME!
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Post by DSR on Sept 11, 2015 22:22:19 GMT -5
Alright, I said I was gonna do it, and by God I'm gonna do it. Here now, because you DEMANDED it (okay, you didn't demand it, but you didn't demand I stop, either), it's my review of...
THE MUMMY'S HAND (1940) - Eight years prior to this, Boris Karloff played THE MUMMY for Universal. He was wrapped in bandages and shambling around for basically a scene before spending the rest of the movie in super-old-age makeup and a fez (fez's are cool). HAND, the film I'm talking about right now, is not a sequel to that classic. It's a reboot! THOSE EXISTED BEFORE THIS DECADE, CAN YOU BELIEVE IT?!
A long, long time ago in a galaxy...oh wait, it's this galaxy, there was an Egyptian princess. Ananka was her name. She died. Her lover, Kharis, couldn't bear to live without her, so he snuck into a temple of Isis to steal Tanna leaves. Tanna leaves are brewed to make a kind of tea that can be used to revive the dead. But Kharis was caught in that temple, had his tongue cut out, and was buried alive not far from Ananka's tomb. An order of Egyptian priests has kept watch over Ananka and Kharis tomb's, and should someone try to tamper with Ananka's eternal resting place, it's up to the current high priest, Andoheb (played by George Zucco) to utilize those very same leaves to bring a BANDAGED SHAMBLING vengeance upon the trespassers.
Cut to archaeologist Steve Banning (Dick Foran) and his comic relief sidekick Babe Jenson (Wallace Ford) at an Egyptian bazaar. Steve has spent the last of the pair's money on an ancient urn that he believes could be of significant value. Steve takes the urn to a nearby museum, where one of his superiors agrees with Steve, but another dismisses the urn as a forgery. That guy happens to be a disguised Andoheb, though, so obviously his word can't be trusted. Steve doesn't know this, mind you, but he dismisses Andoheb's dismissal and plans to look for the tomb anyway. If only he had some money...
As luck would have it, Steve and Babe run into a magician at a local club. The Great Solvani (Cecil Kellaway) quickly befriends our beleaguered pair and decides to fund their archaeological expedition. This doesn't sit well with his daughter, Marta (the beautiful Peggy Moran), who was recently paid a visit by that sneaky Andoheb and now believes that her father was swindled by crooks. Marta and her gun pay Steve a little visit, only to find that her father's money has already been spent on a legitimate expedition. Still, The Great Solvani goes nowhere without his assistant, so Marta's along for the ride. And lurking in the shadows every step of the way will, of course, be Andoheb...and Kharis!
Nowadays, calling something a B movie usually means it's got shoddy production values and lousy actors. The 1940s version of a B movie is a little different. Sure, the script is fairly simple and corners are cut where they can be (Kharis's backstory is filled in with footage from the earlier Karloff picture). But the actors all put in their best effort and the film doesn't honestly feel hampered by it's low budget.
3 stars out of 5. A little dumber and less ambitious than it's predecessor, but quick (just shy of 70 minutes) and enjoyable. And again, bandages. Shambling. It's what you expect from a mummy movie, pre-Brendan Fraser.
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Post by DSR on Sept 13, 2015 1:26:29 GMT -5
TOWER OF LONDON (1939) - So, I just reviewed a B picture, so how about this time I go for an A? Instead of a quick, simple story about a mummy, this time we have an ambitious historical epic!
We begin our story with the senile King Henry VI locked away in the titular tower, his throne usurped by Edward IV (Ian Hunter). Edward is practically attached at the hip to his brother, Richard (Basil Rathbone). It is Richard whose exploits we follow most throughout the film, as he connives his way towards the throne his brother possesses. That means bumping out of the line of succession not only the incumbent King Edward, but his other brother George, Duke of Clarence (Vincent Price, long before becoming the master of horror we know and love), as well as Edward's own sons! Plus there's deposed King Henry's offspring to worry about, and a handful of other people screwed over by Richard's political machinations.
"But DSR," you're wondering, "where is THE HORROR?!" Rest easy, my friends, for the Universal Monster (TM) of this particular film is the (not historically accurate) Mord, trusted executioner and torturer on behalf of Richard (and played by Boris Karloff). Mord is a sight to behold, with his club foot and his bald head and his supremely sinister eyebrows. And, of course, Karloff showcases this character's multiple facets: malicious and menacing when he's "on the job", but extremely worshipful of mastermind Richard. And, at one point, Mord shows his reluctance and remorse when forced to carry out a mission he doesn't entirely agree with.
While Mord seems ill-suited to the regal splendor of the majority of the Tower, he seems right at home in his dungeon. All the beauty and grandeur of the rest of the movie is absent from this playpen of punishment, which shows up on screen and practically screams gothic horror.
I've mentioned in the past I've got a fondness for films that defy easy genre labels and defy expectations, though I understand that willingness to defy expectations might rub others the wrong way. Nowadays, TOWER OF LONDON is found in The Boris Karloff Collection DVD boxset, and it's his face that takes up the film's packaging. But make no mistake, the Story here is Basil Rathbone's cunning (eventual King) Richard. I can see why someone coming in expecting horror from beginning to end might feel ripped off, but I actually like the strategy of having the horror be something of a nesting doll within the larger doll of a period drama.
Besides, we've got Basil Rathbone, Boris Karloff, and Vincent Price! You simply can't go wrong with these three performers (though, quick fun fact: here Price is playing a sniveling coward, outclassed by a character the likes of which he'd become famous for playing a decade and change later). They are great, and thankfully, the film around them is great to match. 4 stars out of 5.
I just wish Mord could've somehow found his way to, say, Transylvania, to join the more popular monsters...
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Lick Ness Monster
Dennis Stamp
From the eerie, eerie depths of Lake Okabena
Posts: 4,874
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Post by Lick Ness Monster on Sept 15, 2015 8:51:29 GMT -5
No big grand introductory babble this time. 2007 Directed by James Wan Starring Ryan Kwanten, Amber Valletta, Donnie Wahlberg and Michael Fairman Another movie from the "I can't believe I haven't seen this until now" file, although I've gotta admit...I kinda wish it still was. Dead Silence isn't a terrible movie by any stretch, but it's not terribly GOOD, either. I remember that it was released with a ton of buzz and publicity, as pretty much any flick with James Wan's name attached to it has been since the release of Saw. Ah, James Wan. Like him or hate him, I don't think it can be denied that this dude has been the single most influential guy in horror for the past decade. With Saw and its never-ending series of sequels, in addition to the Insidious films, The Conjuring, Annabelle, Demonic, the list of big-time horror movies with his name attached to them is pretty impressive. And now he's attached to the Fast and Furious movies, which are as downright terrifying as anything listed above in the fact that they continue to gross as much as the GDP of a small country despite being terrible. I base that astute analysis on the one movie in the franchise that I've seen ( 2 Fast 2 Furious) and the bias that I can't stand Vin Diesel and I'm not a car guy. What CAN'T be denied, however, is that Wan has a unique style that quickly got duped by endless imitators in the spate of "evil ghost" movies that followed in his wake. And in between Saw and evil ghosts...there was Dead Silence. How's that for a segue? Like pretty much any horror with a brisk 90-minute-or-so running time, this movie wastes absolutely no time getting going, introducing us to James Ashen (Kwanten) and his wife Lisa (Laura Regan). This loving couple has just received a very curious gift in the mail - a puppet named "Billy" in an unmarked package. When James leaves to get some take-out Chinese, Lisa begins hearing strange noises emanating from the puppet...and when James comes back, he finds his wife in the kind of severe mutilated state reserved only for the books of Clive Barker. It's actually a pretty impressive set piece, so +1 to the movie in that regard. At this point, the character that serves as the proverbial cock blocker of all fun shows up. Played by Donnie Wahlberg, police detective Jim Lipton exists in this movie solely to be an annoyance to James and the audience, giving his best Keystone Cops-style routine whenever he's onscreen as he smarms it up trying to attach the death to James. I also need to point out that Ryan Kwanten is just not very good as the lead guy here. This role - a husband who has just lost his wife - calls for way more emotion than this guy was willing to dole out, so the good will that we got with the set piece is lost in short order. Unfortunately, the movie only regains it in short bursts from here on out. James heads back to his hometown of Ravens Fair after discovering that this is where the curious puppet arrived from, quickly meeting his estranged father (Bob Gunton) and his much younger wife Ella (Valletta). The story of familial ties really is the backdrop to the rest of the story, however, as the movie begins to flip-flop between two alternate story lines. First, there is James and the odyssey of the puppet, as he discovers that Billy belonged to legendary local puppeteer Mary Shaw - subject of a local nursery rhyme that isn't quite "1, 2, Freddy's coming for you" on the horror movie coolness scale. Needless to say, the ol' bat REALLY liked puppets. Story line number two involves Wahlberg sporadically showing up to harass James, believing his trek back to Ravens Fair to be an attempt to bury evidence of his wife's murder. As you can tell by this point, I wasn't particularly enthralled by the story of this movie. After countless other James Wan movies, this really did feel like more of the same. A bit unfair, since this movie preceded the meat of his "ghost movie" output, but what can you do. That would all be a moot point, however, if I thought the movie worked as a thriller. It does, but only in short spurts. See, this is one of those movies that is pretty heavy on back story. Mary Shaw is your star villain in this movie, with the puppets - Billy and otherwise (spoiler alert) - serving as her revenge against James' family line after she was blamed for the murder of their ancestor Michael, who heckled her during a performance many years ago. Freddy Krueger-style-mob justice scene later, and Mary is a vengeful ghost. There are moments when we're supposed to be creeped out by Billy himself, and this effective...sometimes. Then, there are moments where the ghost of Mary Shaw appears to James, and this is effective...sometimes. But not really. In essence, what we get here are a bunch of startling "LOUD NOISES" scares that have become very prevalent in recent years, and it's not any more effective of a tactic here than it is in anything else. This is also a movie that likes to pile on the twists and exposition, especially in the final trimester. By that point, I was tired of story. Note that I haven't even touched on the subplot involving the elderly couple who were around when Mary Shaw was alive. You can Paypal me fifty bucks if you really want the dirty details on that - or look it up on Wikipedia, whichever you prefer. There really isn't much more to share about Dead Silence. Having seen a couple of Wan's later flicks, he would definitely perfect the formula that he started here in his subsequent efforts. This movie is a little too scatterbrained for its own good, with too many characters and subplots crammed into its lean running time. Coupled up with a cast that isn't terribly interesting, and you've got an only intermittently scary movie that's hard to get into. ** out of ****. Admittedly, the puppets and Shaw are pretty effective villains. However, everything else lets that premise down. Avoid this one.
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Post by DSR on Sept 20, 2015 22:46:32 GMT -5
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Lick Ness Monster
Dennis Stamp
From the eerie, eerie depths of Lake Okabena
Posts: 4,874
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Post by Lick Ness Monster on Sept 22, 2015 9:00:09 GMT -5
New blog post is up. 1996 Directed by Brian Yuzna Starring Corbin Bernsen, Linda Hoffman, Michael Stadvec, Ken Foree, Christa Sauls and Virginya Keehne The Dentist is one of those horror movies that everyone should check out for an example that the axiom "it's not what a movie is about, it's HOW it goes about it" is almost always true. The concept of the flick, to me, sounds mind-numbingly stupid. Dentist discovers his wife cheating on him, goes on murderous rampage. But the slow burn transformation that Corbin Bernsen goes through throughout the flick is actually very well done, to the point that the final bits actually do bear a little bit of weight. So score five points for the axiom writers of the world. Having said that...yes, some concepts are so bad that no amount of dressing up can save them. Gigli, I'm looking at you. One final word: I'm writing this review off two hours of sleep, so don't be surprised if it's brief. The Fun Size Reviews might be making their return. Bernsen plays Dr. Alan Feinstone, successful dentist who lives in a bigass house and has a hot wife. Both of those things are about to be threatened, the latter of which when he discovers his spouse Brooke (Hoffman) cheating on him with the pool boy Matt (Stadvec). The early goings of the movie have Feinstone tracing the movements of Brooke and Matt, getting into trouble by killing his wife's friend's dog, all kinds of fun stuff. There's also this creepy bit when he begins operating on the teeth of beauty queen April Reign (Sauls - and while it's been several years since I've seen the movie, I remember her being smokin' hot), and then operating on some other stuff if you know what I mean. It's a weird section - he hallucinates that April is his really his wife, or something, and then goes about fondling her and removing articles of clothing, followed by having a hell of a time explaining that to the woman's manager. Fun stuff. Moving right along, it's time to get revenge on the people responsible for his misery. Without doubt, these are the movie's money sequences. The "teeth-pulling" scene with Brooke is one of the most cringe-worthy things I've seen in any horror movie, followed by the quick stabbing murder of Matt that shocks us back to reality. At this point, I would like to say a few words about the performance of Bernsen in this movie. In short, it really is something. This movie had a budget of $2.5 million, missed theaters and went straight to video, but it had some solid people behind it and they definitely had a dude in front of the camera who didn't half-ass it. Bernsen INVESTS into Alan Feinstone, to the point where you don't condone the guys actions in the least bit but you can see the gears turning, slowly grinding to a hault and giving way to total insanity. Even when he hits that last point, it's hard to laugh at him. So another five points to the movie there. In between all of this madness, there are the usual bits of police procedural stuff - this time represented by Ken Foree. He has a made up name for his character, but I refuse to call him anything else. Foree is a dude who is well-known to horror veterans as one of the stars of the original Dawn of the Dead and Texas Chain Saw Massacre III, and he's alright here. Truthfully, though, these bits just kind of bog the movie down. It's hard to focus your attention on other things when Bernsen is so damn good at being batshit insane, so call it flaccid penis syndrome by proxy. Whoa, what? Amazingly enough, the stuff that I've talked about so far has pretty much led us directly to the climax. Your setup: Paula (that would be neighbor lady who was also enjoying some pool time with Matt) and Sarah (a teenager played by Virginya Keehne in the office to get her braces taken out) both have encounters with Alan that have very different results. If I remember correctly, this movie has an insanely long "Final Girl" sequence, something like 20 minutes, with Sarah running away from Alan in the office and looking great doing it. Salacious statement time: women of the world, one look that needs to come back is the mid-'90s short skirt and thigh-high socks combo. Lick Ness Monster approves. Awkward summary time: This is actually a pretty damn good movie, despite those boring cop bits and its admittedly out-there premise, because the execution is spot-on. Solid direction, an awesome performance from Bernsen and some solid horror stuff raise this material to a level that it really had no right getting to. Now, there IS a sequel to this movie, and I'm a little hesitant to check it out because this movie had the benefit of the plot device of Alan Feinstone actually GOING insane. I just can't picture it being quite as resonant having him as a nutjob from the beginning, but that's just me. Maybe it's really good. *** out of ****. Not gonna win any awards or anything, but for a lesson in low-budget film-making with plenty of heart and energy, this is one of those "101" lessons.
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Post by DSR on Sept 22, 2015 11:35:02 GMT -5
Solid review, Lick Ness. And, not to steal your thunder, I wrote a review of the sequel way back in 2009.
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Post by Kash Flagg on Sept 23, 2015 23:01:40 GMT -5
Working on a web series around the worst films ever made. Since you guys are people who like some of the same things I do, wanted to ask what would make you watch a review show.
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Post by DSR on Sept 24, 2015 23:54:14 GMT -5
Hey guys, you might remember me saying this a couple of weeks ago: Hope the readers of this ol' Horror Thread don't mind if I ramble a bit. But my horror fandom has reared its ugly head once again. Y'see, I tend to experience fandom in weird short bursts. Like, seeing the recent MAD MAX: FURY ROAD brought in me an obsession with post-apocalyptic sci-fi, so I devoured a large chunk of that particular strain of cinema. Then after awhile, something else struck my fancy, and it's not that I stopped loving after-the-end stories, that fandom just lays dormant somewhere in my mind until something brings it out again. This was part of a larger post about the Classic Universal Monsters, a rabbit hole I was descending into at the time. True to form, in the midst of that exploration, I stumbled upon a preview for a lil' parody of Italian gialli. I enjoyed that preview so much I immediately ordered the DVD/Blu-Ray, and watched it, and am currently feeling much more inclined towards 70s/early 80s horror. If you weren't paying attention when I first mentioned it, that parody film is... THE EDITOR (2014) - A creation of Astron 6, a low-budget Canadian production company specializing in throwbacks to 80s cult fare. Co-producer/co-director/co-writer/editor Adam Brooks also stars as Rey Ciso (one letter added to the Italian word reciso, which means "severed"), a put-upon film editor. Ciso was once considered the greatest editor in film, working on prestige pictures, but a few years ago his film star wife (played by Paz De La Huerta) was fired from an important film and Rey suffered a nervous breakdown, the result of which was four of Rey's fingers ended up on the cutting room floor, and Rey himself ended up in a psych ward for awhile. Those fingers were eventually replaced with wooden prosthetics, but anyway... Nowadays, Rey works on trashy giallo pictures, disrespected at work by vain actors and at home by his horrible shrew of a wife. Rey's assisted in the editing room by a beautiful young apprentice, Bella (played by the lovely Samantha Hill). Rey refuses to act on his desires for this young woman, out of respect for the sanctity of marriage. But those desires are certainly there, and even reciprocated! Rey's life becomes further complicated when the star of the film he's currently working on is brutally murdered. Enter Detective Peter Porfiry (co-producer/co-director/co-writer Matthew Kennedy), who immediately pegs Ciso as the prime suspect (despite a slew of other HIGHLY likely culprits). Detective Porfiry will continue to hound Ciso as other corpses start showing up, and Ciso's own grip on reality slips further and further away... If you're familiar with gialli, the stuff being parodied in this flick will be easily recognizable, including poor sentence structure (usually the result sound dubbing), rampant casual misogyny, weird sexual proclivities, and red herrings that, once revealed as having not been the killer, sure exhibited some serious sociopathic tendencies (included among them the wonderful Udo Kier as a doctor from Ciso's psych ward days). Also littered throughout the flick are references to the targets of the parody, works by Bava, Argento, and Fulci. While the film is well acted and features some beautiful imagery (and music by Claudio Simonetti!), it still manages to drag in parts; I've experienced this with actual gialli, though, so maybe that's part of the parody...? Still, I found myself thinking at times that I'd rather watch those old Italian thrillers than this parody, and other times thinking this is still a pretty solid piece of entertainment in its own right. Even if you're unfamiliar with the sub-genre, I'd like to think there's just enough silliness and certainly enough nudity and gore to make this a worthwhile viewing. I give it 3.9 out of 5 stars. Not always laugh-out-loud funny, but still interesting. Definitely check it out, but don't break the bank paying for it. Now if you'll excuse me, I gotta go set aside some Italian flicks for my annual October horrorthon...
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Post by DSR on Sept 25, 2015 0:20:01 GMT -5
Working on a web series around the worst films ever made. Since you guys are people who like some of the same things I do, wanted to ask what would make you watch a review show. Not a lot of details to go on, but my immediate reaction to the question is: make it look like a show. I mean, I don't expect The Tonight Show, but don't just be a guy sitting in front of a webcam talking.
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Post by Kash Flagg on Sept 25, 2015 10:11:19 GMT -5
Nah, won't just be me in front of a webcam talking. Got a premise, actual camera equipment, and would rather show clips than just talk to a webcam. Plus I'm a funny sumbitch.
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Post by Kash Flagg on Sept 25, 2015 19:57:16 GMT -5
Having a good old fashioned Friday the 13th marathon. The first movie is really underrated as far as being scary.
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Post by 'Foretold' Joker on Sept 28, 2015 10:45:30 GMT -5
On Thursday October starts and that means a horror/monster movie a day for some.
I have a line up ready, whether I hit it or not is always a challenge. Will certainly be offering up a review of the films I do watch.
Anyone else attempting it this year?
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Post by DSR on Sept 28, 2015 16:19:28 GMT -5
On Thursday October starts and that means a horror/monster movie a day for some. I have a line up ready, whether I hit it or not is always a challenge. Will certainly be offering up a review of the films I do watch. Anyone else attempting it this year? I don't know about specifically a movie a day, but I usually manage to cram in a good many horror flicks during the month. Last year I managed 45. In addition to diving into my already pretty large collection, I've also been picking up a few flicks on eBay or in second-hand stores. Some of my new additions include: -the gialli TRAUMA (1978) and HATCHET FOR THE HONEYMOON (1970) -Universal's recent (and much-maligned) vampire action flick DRACULA UNTOLD (2014) -Takashi Shimizu's TORMENTED (2011) -late 80s slasher/comedy (maybe?) DOOM ASYLUM (1987) -a double feature DVD hosted by former WWE Diva and current ROH Woman of Honor Maria Kanellis: SCREAM (1981) and BARN OF THE NAKED DEAD (1974) -a double feature DVD hosted by Katarina Waters (aka Winter from TNA or Katie Lea Burchill from WWE): MARK OF CAIN (1986) and THRILLKILL (1984)
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Lick Ness Monster
Dennis Stamp
From the eerie, eerie depths of Lake Okabena
Posts: 4,874
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Post by Lick Ness Monster on Sept 29, 2015 11:13:00 GMT -5
Time for a new review. By my count, it's only the second "After Dark HorrorFest" flick I've seen, and...it didn't really whet my appetite for more. 2006 Directed by J.S. Cardone Starring Lori Heuring, Scout Taylor-Compton, Chloe Grace Moretz, Geoffrey Lewis and Ben Cross It looks like I've already reached the depths of Netflix. Wicked Little Things was one of the much-ballyhooed "8 Films to Die For" in the original After Dark Horrorfest, which tells this guy several things. Namely, it was either going to be a woefully underappreciated gem, or really, severely misguided. 95 minutes later, I'm going with Option #2. This is just a really STRANGE movie, and one that I'm not entirely sure how to explain. It's kind of a zombie movie (I know - ugh), but it's one unlike any that I've ever seen. They're also...ghosts, I guess, which makes this kind of in the same vein as some of Lucio Fulci's weird materializing zombie epics, only about .0000005% as good. In addition to that, it's got Scout Taylor-Compton a year before she would be saddled with the task of playing Rob Zombie's version of Laurie Strode, getting to play Zombie's Laurie Strode under a different name. In short, likability = nonexistant. AND it has Chloe Moretz a few years before hitting it big as Hit Girl and a pair of very well-received horror remakes that will go unnamed, mostly due to the fact that I refuse to watch them out of principle. Thus, while this isn't a very good flick, it's interesting, so let's get to it. The flick opens up with one of those flashback sequences that horror film-makers seem to adore, giving us the "past evil" in "show don't tell" form as a cruel mine baron is employing and exploiting a large group of immigrant children in rural Carlton, Pennsylvania. A horrific accident soon buries all of the children alive in what I'm sure is meant to be some sort of symbolism that I'm too dumb to pick up on. Warp forward 80 years, where the mine is long closed and that evil baron was acquitted for his crimes. Meet the Tunny family - mother Karen (Lori Heuring), teenage daughter Sarah (Compton) and young-'un Emma (Moretz). The trio have just dealt with a long illness and death of the father, and are moving into his family house in Carlton because reasons. All of which immediately fitting into the pre-disposed horror movie family roles that should be familiar to anyone reading this. The mother is protective and concerned, the teen is rebellious and all kinds of pissed off about living in Hicksville, the daughter is percocious and scared by all of the weird local rituals and goings-on. For her part, Moretz really is the star here, no matter how milquetoast her role, and it isn't hard to figure out why she would eventually be a breakout star and why Compton would soon be doomed to Rob Zombie-land. And...that's pretty much it. From here, the family starts to hear sounds at night, Emma wanders off into the forest and finds the old mine, and the strange ritual that many of the townsfolk have involving painting blood on their doors is discussed a few times. We meet an anciliary character named Hanks, played by Ben Cross in full scenery-chewing mode, who seems to be the guy looking out for the Turner family in between whatever it is he does for a living besides speaking in hushed tones about the ghoulies that go bump in the night. All throughout, the presentation is just weird in a way that you can't take your eyes off of the train wreck. The movie essentially has two subplots. Unfortunately, one of them involves Compton's character, as she adjusts to the teenage life in Carlton. Taking place in one 30-second scene, she rebukes the advances of the local douchebag while simultaneously becoming interested in his nice guy friend, leading to a few scenes where the group sits around in cars, listens to heavy metal, smokes doobies and partake in some make-out sessions. It's just as captivating as it sounds. The other is the rather haphazard way that we find out that, yes, the mountains of Carlton, Pennsylvania are occupied by honest-to-goodness zombie children who come out every night to feed, and that the blood on the doors is way of appeasing their hungry spirits. Oh, and both Hanks and the Turner family are related to the zombies, and thus can't be harmed by them. Don't ask. If you can't tell, I wasn't particularly into this movie. I WILL give the movie some credit when it comes to the third act, as the local land developer baron (also conveniently related to the guy who was responsible for that mine accident all those years ago) finds himself locked up with Hanks, Karen and Sarah, leading up to a five-minute sequence that actually consists of some pretty nifty horror and a whole heap o' stage blood literally poured out on the cast. It lulls the audience out of their stupor, but it's too little too late. Ultimately, with me, it always comes down to characters, and this movie doesn't captivate you with them. A fatal flaw in a genre that depends on emotional investment leading up to mortal danger, and it's the fatal strike here. * 1/2 out of ****. I suspect that the only reason Netflix coughed up the cash to have this one in their library is Moretz, anfd it shows, because everything else is an interesting-yet-forgettable mismash. Skip this one.
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