enough is enough (weight loss)

[Evil Homer]

I've been overweight since i was 11, obese since 19 (27 soon). I've had enough. In the past I've lost some weight, had success- and then fell into depression and unhappiness and gained the weight back. but i cannot live like this anymore. Im in pain most of the time, i don't sleep properly. My life is a mess, i dropped out of college- and been working dead end job after dead end, all because i am unhappy. Why am i unhappy?, cause Im fat. I know i can do better , I just know it's weight that is holding me back. I plan on starting the gym regularly every week, and always put it off- well actually i do go to the gym 1-2 times a week. what sucks is food intake as well, I end up making bad food choices while at work- due to co workers.

I NEED to change, I've never ever had a girlfriend, never a relationship with a female at alll, not saying I'm terrible looking- girls have shown interest in me ,but due to lack of confidence (and shyness, mostly due to weight ), I never pursued anything. I'm not anti-social or anything. I gotta change- i just have to. I know weight loss can be achieved ,my concern is lose skin- and some thing known as gynecomastia (man breasts) which I heard does not go away with weight loss, anyone that's lost weight maybe can answer these, after massive weight loss (100 lbs), did you have lose skin , and the did the chest area symmterically decrease with the rest of the body? I'm not concerned with some lose skin , but I've seen some really horrible looking folds on some people (which i would want avoid), also I cannot lose a temendous amount of weight and still have man boobs- I mean that would devastating, and make feel even worse, anyone with any tips on weight loss , or lose skin-please share

[Johawn]

It depends on how you're proportioned to begin with. I'm a heavy guy, trying to lose weight, too. I've been up and down, mostly up, but I've always been...well, not happy but okay with my appearance. I've never had trouble getting girls, but I'm not really too shy. A little quiet, maybe. Losing weight does not guarantee girls, happiness, or anything except sweating less and an increase your capacity to master stairs. Make sure it's for the right reasons. I dunno, man. If you focus on what you suspect may be wrong with you if you lose it all, then to me that's sort of tapping out on doing it in the first place. Doing it the right way, though, exercising and toning, I'm sure will minimise any (for want of a better term) side effects. If not...f***, you lose 100lbs then treat yourself to a tuck or two, because that'd be monumental. Best of luck, man. And hey, if you feel like checking in with someone will help keep you motivated, hit me up with a PM and we can rock this shit together.

[Munkie91087]

You can absolutely do it man! No doubt. In high school I always hovered around 280-290 pounds. (I'm only 5'8, so really big) In the past couple years i've managed to get my weigh to 195-200 range. Still not super skinny, but I am very happy with the results. Takes a lot of work and some life style changes, but I know you can do it.

["Gentleman" AJ Powell]

Good luck is all I can say. I've been doing it for a a few months now, some times I'll fluctuate up & down, feel real s***, but at the end of the day, I'm still going down gradually, no matter how long it takes. Just don't give up & keep at it! I've personally never had any problems with loose skin, but I guess I'm still growing, (ergo why I'm nipping it in the bud with the weight loss), but that only seems to happen in extreme cases.

[Evil Homer]

Sept 7, 2012 15:05:51 GMT -5 Johawn said:

It depends on how you're proportioned to begin with. I'm a heavy guy, trying to lose weight, too. I've been up and down, mostly up, but I've always been...well, not happy but okay with my appearance. I've never had trouble getting girls, but I'm not really too shy. A little quiet, maybe. Losing weight does not guarantee girls, happiness, or anything except sweating less and an increase your capacity to master stairs. Make sure it's for the right reasons. I dunno, man. If you focus on what you suspect may be wrong with you if you lose it all, then to me that's sort of tapping out on doing it in the first place. Doing it the right way, though, exercising and toning, I'm sure will minimise any (for want of a better term) side effects. If not...f***, you lose 100lbs then treat yourself to a tuck or two, because that'd be monumental. Best of luck, man. And hey, if you feel like checking in with someone will help keep you motivated, hit me up with a PM and we can rock this s*** together.

I don't feel too bad about the way I look, I've been told by many people that I look good - I just need rid myself of the weight (this by both guys and girls). which is re assuring, maybe its just me using these as excuses- cause weight loss is really hard, and a LOT of work has to go into it, no 2 ways about it. I wouldnt want to have to do any plastic surgery at all, but at the same time am not 100% against it either. You may be right in saying that weight loss does not guarantee girls, BUT i have to say- the reason why I'm reserved is because of weight. If/when I lose it - I'll be more open to conversation ( I have lost weight before, though never reached my goal weight, and felt way more confident). Maybe thats just me

[xCompackx]

Wanting to make a change is a big first step and since you have that, you can definitely do it. Good luck.

[BoilerRoomBrawler]

I've been losing ~10lbs a month since August 2011. That of course means I'm down 120lbs and I'm still chugging along and I have no intention of stopping any time soon.

It all starts with what you're eating, not what you're doing with what you're eating. If you really put your mind to it, pick a diet that you can live with. Think long term; you'll only set yourself up for failure with short term diets that don't teach you anything about changing your eating habits or else you'll return to your old ways once you stop.

Furthermore, if you find a diet you like, that you can commit to for the long term, give it time to work. The first weight you usually lose is water weight, which is gained back very easily. Not only that, but if you exercise, you might gain weight in muscle - keep that in mind if you are exercising and regaining weight. Beyond that, I guarantee that you will plateau many times in the course of your diet - your body likes a status quo and you are rocking it, so show it who is boss by weathering every storm and staying committed through every plateau - the weight will be lost eventually. I go through it every month, and the first couple of times were discouraging until the pattern asserted itself as a routine, after which it was no problem.

The fact you acknowledge you must lose weight - that you have a problem - is the first step to recovery. Do your research and find a diet that you are comfortable with eating over the long term. Figure out what kind of exercise routine you can do - ease your way in, no need to dive into the deep end.

You can do it if you keep your nose to the grindstone.

[Deleted]

First off, the fact that you want to make a change is definitely a good thing.

I'm somewhat of an anomaly but I'll throw in my experience. In a little over a year I lost 152lbs, going from 364lbs at my heaviest to 212lbs at one point, and I'll be damned if I know how I did it. Sure, I wanted to lose the weight, but I didn't work hard to do it. I didn't cut down on my eating that much, I didn't do a whole lot of exercise, I had the flu for a week or two but that only contributed a very small amount, the only thing that would have had any bearing was starting smoking again, but I'd lost about 30 or 40lbs by that point already. So basically, don't do what I did, it was a happy accident. As for right now I've recently been under a lot of stress and I'm currently experiencing some downtime, during which I've put back on 15-20lbs of that weight, purely due to stress eating, snacking due to boredom, and the, uh, "medication" I use to control my stress calls for a lot of food at certain times. If you're sitting around with nothing better to do than eat, don't do it. Find something better to do, because every little helps.

In answer to your questions, I've had no problems with loose skin. If you're looking at a realistic, gradual weight loss, it's not really an issue. As for man breasts, that is a problem I do still face. In spite of dropping two t-shirt sizes and 12" in waist size, they haven't really decreased at all. I've essentially been told by doctors that surgery is the only option, and unfortunately for me I'm still slightly over the weight limit to be approved for the surgery. So while that's a bit of a problem for me, it won't necessarily be for you, as my problem appears to be mostly genetic rather than anything weight related. It's something you'll find out as you begin to drop the weight.

Best of luck in everything, aside from the obvious physical benefits if you think it's gonna make you happier then it's the right thing to do. I was a shy, unconfident big guy for a long time, and while I still have problems with my self-confidence at times, I'm definitely overcoming it. Just remember, one step at a time.

[Piccolo]

If you're young, I think your skin has a lot more elasticity, and you should be fine.

Re: tips on weight loss, I've lost some weight over the past half a year (21 lbs, which is a lot for my little 5'2" frame) by changing to a South Beach type of diet... lots of meat and vegetables and beans (consumed in creative ways... there are lots of recipes online, but my favorite is butternut squash fries), some fruits and cheese and whole wheat, and some semisweet baking chocolate and/or whipped cream for a sweet snack.

It's insanely easy to stick to, I'm eating a ton more vegetables than I ever did before and really liking them, and I'm skinny. No downsides whatsoever except that you have to be vigilant about cooking/preparing your foods. Plus, if your friends are trying to get you to eat unhealthily, you have to stick to your guns at least until you've gotten to the point where unhealthy food is no longer especially appetizing. Once you're at that point, it's easy to have an unhealthy meal or snack and then go right back to your nutritious food, but if you're still craving the nasty processed stuff, giving in once could be a little harder to shake off. If they're going out for lunch every day, find something at that place that doesn't have white sugar or white flour and you'll probably be OK.

I think it's helpful, or it was for me, to look at eating the same way as I look at saving money. Sometimes, I'll want to spend money for an awesome trip or a new computer. Having generally good habits with money... like, looking for sales instead of buying full-price, going to matinees instead of evening shows, etc... means I build up a cushion for the indulgences I DO really want to make. Similarly, sometimes you're out with your friends or your family and there are no healthy options, and it'll be a drag for them if you don't join in the festivities. So if you've built up a cushion by eating healthy whenever you have a choice in the matter, you won't have to decline cake or pizza or whatever in those situations. Your lifestyle and regular eating habits will be healthy, so that one moment will be a blip on the radar.

For me, it was largely about changing my mindset regarding food and what my default choices should be when I'm hungry. If I default to meat and veggies, I stay thin. If I default to Goldfish crackers and Coke (my previous staple), I gain weight. It's not about restricting food, just prioritizing better foods.

Good luck and keep us updated!

[agent817]

I may be overweight, but I do keep myself active a lot and my weight fluctuates and maintains mostly than drops but I have gotten a little thinner than I was before. I know there are times when I overindulge and I acknowledge that I should not have ate something.

I will say this, I don't eat fast food that much, and I usually limit myself to a couple of places, though it can vary in some areas, but I usually have it once in a while.

[Evil Homer]

** UPDATE **
For the last two weeks , I have started going to the gym. I am not in full diet mode yet, I wanna ease my way into the gym,then start dieting properly. Also I am in the process of quiting smoking. I am currently down to one a day, And hope to stop altogether once this current pack is done (12 remain). I'm on my way once again, any advice or words of encouragement will be appreaciated .

[fuzzywarble, squat cobbler]

Good luck. I was a lardball from my toddler years 'til I was 15, and one day I just had enough and did it cold turkey- quit all fattening foods, fried foods, cut out sugar significantly, etc. I did enlist the help of a can of Slim Fast, but I quickly taught myself about nutrition and after a little while I stopped using Slim Fast. I also took that time to get acquainted with exercise.

That was 20 years ago...and I haven't looked back.

You can do it.

[fuzzywarble, squat cobbler]

Sept 27, 2012 8:00:12 GMT -5 Evil Homer said:

** UPDATE **
For the last two weeks , I have started going to the gym. I am not in full diet mode yet, I wanna ease my way into the gym,then start dieting properly. Also I am in the process of quiting smoking. I am currently down to one a day, And hope to stop altogether once this current pack is done (12 remain). I'm on my way once again, any advice or words of encouragement will be appreaciated .

Wow...one pack a day's a lot. That might be tougher than the whole weight loss thing.

[HMARK Center]

Starting in early 2010 I dropped around 50 pounds, and then put some back on as muscle. I'm not exactly where I want to be, but I'm more toned than I've probably ever been. I feel like I have a plateau with certain things concerning my body, but it's not the end of the world.

The thing with weight loss is that it's very unique for every individual; what works for any number of people might not work for you. But there are a few guiding principles, some already stated here, that are pretty universal:

-Diet is the key
More than any other factor, what you eat dictates a lot about how you work, feel, and how much weight you stand to lose. Don't fall for fad diets...in fact, don't think of it as "dieting" at all, because the -ing at the end means present tense and implies that there's an end to it at some point. Rather, think of a long term diet that you can stick to. For me, that meant going pescatarian (no meat except seafood), but that's not true for everybody.
Think about changes you can make and sustain (e.g. swapping whole wheat for white flour breads, a limit on sweets intake, etc.), but don't think it'll all work overnight. Changing long held eating habits takes time. And yes, teach yourself to enjoy more fruits and veggies.

-Exercise, but vary it up
When you build muscle, you also burn fat faster. Yes, it'll register as putting on weight, but it's better for you in the long run. Stick to the usual: 30-60 minutes of cardio when you get to do it, then look up different things to do with weights, machines at the gym, or simple push up/pull up/ab crunch combinations. A few days a week is fine, if you've altered your diet.

-Don't get down on yourself, or do as best you can
This one's tough; I have days where I look at myself and think "Ugh, why haven't you worked harder? Why did you eat <whatever> last night? You don't look great today", but those thoughts have GOT to be fleeting. Negative reinforcement never, ever, ever works out in the long run.

Consider that just making the decision to get healthier is a huge step, and that can provide a strong mental boost.

-MOST IMPORTANT: Its about health, not weight
Well, ok, it can be about weight if you're TOO overweight, but every body has different thresholds for where they can be healthy. Some people are tall but thin-framed, some are short and stocky, some visa versa on both, etc.
For all you know you might never achieve a "perfect" body (whatever that is); you might never see six pack abs, you might never have huge biceps, you might never have really obvious pecs, etc.
That's not a big problem, though; all the good stuff you do adds up, and will leave you feeling better. Just being more social often helps people be healthier, since they're out and moving around more. Once you've dropped the first X-number of pounds (whatever fits your needs best), focus on maintaining good health.

[Evil Homer]

Sept 27, 2012 8:28:31 GMT -5 fuzzywarble, squat cobbler said:

Sept 27, 2012 8:00:12 GMT -5 Evil Homer said:

** UPDATE **
For the last two weeks , I have started going to the gym. I am not in full diet mode yet, I wanna ease my way into the gym,then start dieting properly. Also I am in the process of quiting smoking. I am currently down to one a day, And hope to stop altogether once this current pack is done (12 remain). I'm on my way once again, any advice or words of encouragement will be appreaciated .

Wow...one pack a day's a lot. That might be tougher than the whole weight loss thing.

maybe i worded that wrong, I meant to say I was down to once cigarette a day, and once this pack is done- I will try my best to kick the habit for good.

[fuzzywarble, squat cobbler]

Now I have the Evil Homer song stuck in my head.

[Nikki Heyman]

You can do it - if I can drop 45 pounds, anyone can

I don't go to the gym as much as I used to (work schedule, mostly) but here's some of the things I do to maintain:

-portion controls/calories: I try to eat 4-5 times a day, protein heavy. Lots of veggies, whole grains, no fruit late in the day. LOTS of water. If you must have soda/caffeine, diet sodas only. Most meals rarely break the 400 calorie barrier.

-It's ok to eat late - it's what you have that matters. I usually have a protein shake (>200 cal) about an hour before bed. Remember, your body is still going even when you're asleep - and 8 hours without food could cause some slowing in the metabolism.

-I don't really have any absolute "cannot eat" foods on my list, but I look at my options when it comes to different foods. There is always a lower calorie alternative to even the worst foods for you. When you get something that might be "Bad" for you, halve the portion per the nutrition information. That alone can help.

-I agree with varying your workouts. I would alternate days of cardio and weights, and sometimes do a day of both. For weight loss, more reps and less weight is ideal.

-once you've quit smoking you might see your weight start to go back up - the nicotine likely sped up your heartbeat to help lose some of the weight. Try not to replace smoking with more eating.

I've managed to stay in the 170s for a year with reasonable maintenance and sticking to my food choices

[Bone Daddy]

You can do it man. Over the past 3 years I've lost almost 60 pounds and it feels great. It takes a lot of hard work, and you'll have good days and bad but keep at it.

[efram]

you mentioned you work? can you save up for surgery? it will be expensive but totally worth it if it's what you really want, surgery can also remove the moobs and excess skin as well.

[Jazzman]

Homer, as a big guy who knows I've got to drop some pounds I'm pulling for ya man. I'm going to start going hardcore starting Oct. 1, yeah I know it's a weird time especially with the holidays and what not, but I'm hoping everything works out for you.