Pictured: the many voices of the world famous Boys Choir of Harlem
*Senor Tyger, addressing the seventeen remaining contestants on an undisclosed sound stage somewhere in Stanford, Connecticut.*
Senor Tyger: Right. I'll continue to Host the remainder of this Season and- Majin Brad, if you would refrain from playing around with Jimmy Hart's Megaphone, this Round of FAN Idol will reach its conclusion in a timely manner.
Majin Brad (Putting down the Mouth of the South's legendary Megaphone, amidst other WWF paraphernalia including a green bag filled with snakes, the name Ssnakebite printed on its side): Awww, I just wanted to mess around with it (puts it up to his lips) "Yeah Baby!"
Senor Tyger: As I was saying, I will continue to Host this Season of FAN Idol in lieu of Mr. Cageking. Evidently, there was a security breech at his Island estate and Papua New Guinea is now host to a Gang of far too intelligent Monkeys that.... excuse me Mr. Stinger4Christ but what are you do-
Stinger4Christ (dressed up as Crow Sting with "IDOL" written on his black T-shirt in a stylish font): Contestants! Thank you all for your musical submissions for this Round of FAN Idol, as chosen by Mr. Sloth Spartan, Voices!!! It is my pleasure to announce that the Winner is-
fw91 (microphone in one hand, a folder filled with sheet music): For the 17 would-be Fan Idols for this, the 9th Season of FAN Idol, the Road thus far has been filled with twists and turns that would test even the most seasoned of contestants! Let's take a moment to look over some of the highs and lows that have already made-
Senor Tyger: But I'm the Host! Me! You know, is it asking too much for a little briefing on what-
*Walking slowly onto stage, Canctus Fraggle waves to the confused contestants and takes a deep bow*
Canctus Fraggle (holding a Slammy with the letters "FAN" sloppily applied over its placard): My friends, it is a honor and a pleasure to be your Host for the upcoming Rounds. Nothing fills my heart with more happiness than to see the amount of skill on display in this room! Never before in the annuals of FAN Idol has there been a better collection of talent than-
fw91 (cutting Canctus off)- Speaking of collection... look, we only need on Host and you're looking at him. My contract stipulated that, due to coming in third last Season (no doubt due to HIS actions, pointing to Senor Tyger), I had the right to claim the Hosting duties for the current Season. Now, obviously, you are all valued members of MY judging team but-
Stinger4Christ (pointing a black bat at fw91)- Excuse me, YOUR judging team. Well, fw, I was the runner-up for FAN Idol Season VII and MY contract states that, in the event of Cageking's absence, I was to take over Hosting duties and restore some order to the proceedings. I mean, some big talking Tiger goes around here and- you know what, I'm done! You can have your little Round, I have to plan for the rest of the Season. (Points to the ceiling, a zipline drops down and Stinger4Christ shoots right up into the rafters, looking down at contestant and judge alike with a scowl on his face, disappearing into the shadows) "You dorks!"
Senor Tyger: .... Ok then, I really need to get a new agent. (Looks to see Canctus Fraggle and fw91 arguing among themselves, Canctus talking about they should hire the Dozers from back home to make them a proper trophy for this Season's winner while fw91 stated over and over again that it was of the utmost importance to hire Mr Met for this one Round that he wanted to run, where the FAN Idols had to pick a song related to a MLB team)
Senor Tyger: Sigh... Ok, here are the results of- WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING!?!?
*Demented is in the middle of the stage throwing knives at... what appears to be another Demented strapped to a spinning wheel fixed to a prop wall located at the other end of the stage. Above the wheel is a sign that reads "I never miss Tyger... except when I do. HAHAHAHAHAHA!!"
Demented (make-up garishly applied, rubber knives in hand that sure shine a lot for rubber knives): *Taking aim and missing the other Demented by centimeters* (Shrugs) I'm Hosting.
Senor Tyger: Contestants and Judges, for "Voices", the would-be Idols had to select a song that featured at least two vocalists. A hip-hop stable, a love song from a powerhouse pop duo, choirs, collaborations that use technology to breach the gaps of space and time to unit two disparate artists, all of these were at your disposal. So, whose voices soared the highest and whose voices scarcely broke a whisper? Adding this Round's scores to last Round's results (the songs placement for this Round will be included in the result), we shall decide who moves on to the next stage of our competition and who still has to earn that right through competing in the Sing-Off. Here are the results:
In first place, with a combined total of 123 points, is a contestant who, time and time again, demonstrates just how big of a threat he is whenever he plays FAN Idol. Not just getting by is enough for...
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Moon Unit Zapp- I mean, Moonie!!! who survived this Round and so much more, not only getting by with the legendary Marvin Gaye, accompanied by Tammi Terrell, but taking first place (1st place this Round as well with 75 points) with their You're All I Need to Get by! Congratulations!!!Earning the Silver, receiving 115 big points and second place, is a contestant who seems to be a fixture at the top. Don't blink because this contestant has a lot of tricks up her sleeve...
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Roxie Daggers!!! Who continues to open up the judges' eyes with her rock solid picks, including rock monarchs Ozzy Osbourne and Lita Ford's dazzling Close My Eyes Forever (2nd place this Round with 73 points)!!!
Rounding out the top three is a contestant known for taking risky choices, taking home 104 points. If you ask him to give you a song with two voices, you may be surprised with what those voices have to say...
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Sloth Spartan!!! who keeps giving us good reasons for keeping him around, with Just Give Me a Reason by pop princess Pink, featuring Nate Ruess, taking in 47 points, 6th place for this Round!!!
With 101 points and in 4th place, just three points shy of a 3rd place tie, is a contestant who has been coming in strong as of late. I expect a lot of heart racing songs and dramatic moments from...
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J!!! who just keeps the beat moving on strong with the xx's ethereal Heart Skipped a Beat, which gathered 46 points (tied for 7th) this Round!!!
Coming in strong with 96 points and 5th place, gaining a lot of ground from the prior Round, is a contestant who chose a funky collaboration from a Top 40 legend and one of the highlights of the alternative rock/ pop scene of the 1990's...
{Spoiler}{Spoiler}Pegasus Warrior!!! who's been starting fires as of late in this competition, selecting the iconic Tom Jones' and Swede rockers the Cardigans take on New Wave magicians Talking Heads' Burning Down the House (receiving 60 points and third place for this Round)!!!
In 6th place, riding tall with 88 points, is another strong contestant who with a lot of life still left in their Idol Season. Moving onto the next Round, in great shape for the future and ready to go is...
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Lodi "Wyatt" Rulz!!! who keeps on fighting, never backing down, with Tennessee's own power rock band Skillet and their song of faith and affirmation, Awake and Alive (52 pts and 5th place)!!!
Taking with him 82 big points and wrapping up 7th place, is a contestant who sought a big time, orchestral sound mixed with an incendiary metal beat. The place is here and the time is now for...
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Mr. B Natural: Law/Disorder!!! who set his watch to German power metal/ rock opera super group Avantasia's gripping Where Clock Hands Freeze (41 pts and 11th place)!!!
8th place is reserved for a contestant who chose a clever way of playing this Round, choosing not only a track that featured more than one voice but more than one song as well. Fear the mash-ups of...
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Alex Hayden: Weapon X!!! who covered all the bases this Round, selecting AHMIR and Sam Tsui's soulful mashup Nothing on You, Soul Sister by AHMIR and Sam Tsui (45 pts and 8th place)!!!
Sealing up 9th place, enjoying 77 big points, is a contestant that, time and time again, reminds us to appreciate our musical past. The two voices selected were as smooth as silk and the future looks smooth for...
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Knalsic Loves to Boogie!!! who decided to wander around with the majestic duo of Otis Redding and Carla Thomas smooth soul blues hit, Tramp (46 pts, tied with 7th)
Rounding out the top ten, just two points short of a tie in 9th place with 75 points, is a contestant who's really playing with the Bog Boys here, choosing a song about the highs and lows of fame. Looking forward to a long career from the contestant in 10th place...
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suavegentleman!!! who freed himself from any worry about next Round, making great use of the melodic Superstar from Lupe Fiasco (28 points, 14th)!!!
As close as you can get, with 1 point shy of a tie for tenth place, is a contestant that always challenges us with tricky yet melodic tracks season after season. In 11th place, with 74 points, soaring towards the stars is...
{Spoiler}{Spoiler}Jazzman!!! who brought forward the full might of a virtual choir of musical talents, employing visionary composer and conductor Eric Whitacre's Virtual Choir's remarkable Fly to Paradise (33 points, 11th place)!!!
Showing just how close this Round has been, in 12th place, just 1 point shy of a tie for 11th with 73 points is a contestant who is always a threat to watch out for in every Season of FAN Idol. Expect a wall of sound in the future from...
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Gus "The Predator" Richlen!!! who refuses hear any answers to his tough musical questions with The Alan Parsons Project's saxophone laced Don't Answer Me (44 pts, 9th place)!!!
Keeping the margin of victory razor thin, 13th place saw a contestant earn 72 points, just one short of a tie for 12th place, with a song that strives to replicate the sound of the great duets of years past, finding poignancy with the idea that "you love who you love". There's a lot to love about this contestant's musical taste...
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Orange!!! who chose rock chameleon John Mayer's duet with the bubbly Katy Perry, the breezy, country inspired Who You Love (43 points, 10th place)!!!
In 14th place, firmly in control with 67 points, is a contestant who is a bit unpredictable. Season after Season, there is a certain amount of mystery about what he'll pick next. Always taking a risk is...
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Majin Brad!!! who keeps his secrets close to his chest, always making sure to keep kayfabe with the WWE Superstar's If You Only Knew (54 points, 4th place)!!!
Would the final three contestants step forward:
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DJ Maestro Waffel113.
radradsley.
Square.
This Round posed particular challenges to every contestant. What genre and time period to use? How many singers and what roles played by each one? Should you use an established vocal duo or band or go for a special collaboration or guest appearance?
You all succeeded marvelously but there has to be a bottom two. Only a total of three points separated the contestant advancing to the next Round and last place. Each elimination makes the competition that much harder, as musical standards rise and contestants become more and more confidant they will soon join the ranks of FAN Idol winners. One of you skillful players will move on now while the other two must meet in our next Sing-Off.
Earning 53 points (27 points for this Round and 15th place), the contestant moving on to the next Round is...
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Square!!! who selected Same Love by the inimitable Macklemore, alongside Ryan Lewis and featuring Mary Lambert (27 points, 15th place)!!!
That means that the sing off will between:
DJ Maestro Waffell113!!! (who earned a total of 51 points) selected Love Gun, by Cee-lo Green and featuring Lauren Bennett (34 points and 12th place)!!!
and
radradsley!!! who picked Warren G's Regulate, featuring Nate Dogg (18 points, 16th place) and who scored a total of 50 points!!!
Good luck gentlemen! Make this a Sing-off to bring the rafters down!!!
Judges' Rankings (the number after the contestant's name is the points that they earned last Round; the number after that is the total for both Rounds):
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1. Moonie (48 pts)- 123
You’re All I Need to Get By- Marvin Gaye and Tammi Terrell
CF-16, CK-13, D-15, FW-15, S-16= 75 (1st)
2. Roxie Daggers (42 pts)- 115
Close My Eyes Forever- Ozzy Osbourne & Lita Ford
CF-17, CK-15, D-10, FW-17, S-14 = 73 (2nd)
3. Sloth Spartan (57 pts)- 104
Just Give Me a Reason- Pink featuring Nate Ruess
CF-3, CK-12, D-6, FW-14, S-12= 47 (6th)
4. J (55 pts)- 101
Heart Skipped a Beat- The xx
CF-10, CK-14, D-1, FW-6, S-15= 46 (T-7th)
5. Pegasuswarrior (36 pts)- 96
Burning Down the House- Tom Jones and the Cardigans
CF-15, CK-9, D-16, FW-12, S-8= 60 (3rd)
6. Lodi “Wyatt” Rulz (36 pts)- 88
Awake and Alive- Skillet
CF-7, CK-17, D-17, FW-8, S-3= 52 (5th)
7. Mr. B Natural: Law/Disorder (41 pts)- 82
Where Clock Hands Freeze- Avantasia
CF-9, CK-7, D-5, FW-11, S-9= 41 (11th)
8. Hayden Moss (33 pts)- 78
Nothing On You, Soul Sister- AHMIR and Sam Tsui
CF-12, CK-2, D-2, FW-16, S-13= 45 (8th)
9. Knalsic Loves to Boogie (31 pts)- 77
Tramp- Otis Redding & Carla Thomas
CF-8, CK-16, D-9, FW-7, S-6= 46 (T-7th)
10. Suavegentleman (47 pts)- 75
Superstar- Lupe Fiasco
CF-5, CK-10, D-7, FW- 4, S-2 = 28 (14th)
11. Jazzman (41 pts)- 74
Fly to Paradise- Eric Whitacre’s Virtual Choir
CF-4, CK-11, D-12, FW-2, S-4= 33 (13th)
12. Gus “The Predator” Richlen (29 pts) - 73
Don’t Answer Me- The Alan Parsons Project
CF- 14, CK-4, D-11, FW-5, S-10= 44 (9th)
13. Orange (29 pts)- 72
Who You Love- John Mayer ft. Katy Perry
CF-11, CK-1, D-4, FW-10, S-17= 43 (10th)
14. Majin Brad (13 pts)- 67
If You Only Knew- WWE Superstars
CF-13, CK-3, D-14, FW-13, S-11= 54 (4th)
15. Square (26 pts)- 53
Same Love- Macklemore X Ryan Lewis ft. Mary Lambert- Same Love
CF-1, CK-8, D-8, FW-9, S-1= 27 (15th)
16. DJ Maestro Waffel113 (17 pts)- 51
Love Gun- Cee-Lo Green, featuring Lauren Bennett
CF-6, CK-6, D-13, FW-1, S-7= 34 (12th)
17. Radradsley (32 pts)- 50
Regulate- Warren G feat. Nate Dogg
CF-2, CK-5, D-3, FW-3, S-5= 18 (16th)
