shaker
Team Rocket
The numbers don't lie - and they spell disaster for you at Sacrifice!
Posts: 779
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Post by shaker on Dec 19, 2013 9:34:14 GMT -5
No doubt, Punk's pipebomb helped catapault him into superstardom. And AJ's similar promo a while back helped her out as well. So I'm thinking, what if other wrestlers cut their own pipebombs??
Zack Ryder: "I'll bet you all want me to come out here and say WOO WOO WOO? Well it's not gonna happen. Because the simple fact of the matter is I'm done being Long Island Iced Z, done being the Woo Woo Woo kid. For years I've been the face of the WWE on the internet, until Vince and his yes men decided to take over Z! True Long Island Stories and run it into the ground. And you know why? Because they were scared. Scared that Zack Ryder would be bigger than the WWE, and be able to transcend this. So I'm done pushing the WWE's merchandise machine. I'm just Zack Ryder, standing out here, getting over ON HIS OWN.
My contract is up in 13 days, and when that's done, I'm out of here. But before then, I have a US Title match with Dean Ambrose. And I'm going to win, and take that belt out of the WWE. Maybe I'll head over to Japan, maybe I'll go back to the New York Wrestling Connection. Hell, maybe I'll go the House of Hardcore!! Hey Tommy Dreamer, how ya doing?
And one more thing. HHH and Stephanie are the biggest hyprocrites you'll ever meet. You thought I was a cuckold when I went against Kane? Well HHH likes to watch while" *MIC CUTS OUT*
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Deleted
Deleted Member
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Post by Deleted on Dec 19, 2013 9:36:39 GMT -5
So calling a worked shoot a pipebomb is a thing now?
In that case Jeff Jarrett has done a pipebomb.
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Post by jason1980s on Dec 19, 2013 9:41:15 GMT -5
Interesting thread and I do like the Zack Ryder promo. It may be the only thing that can save his career at this point.
Punk is another worked promo, so to speak. It may have been all from heart, no script, but he still did it with WWE opinion.
To me, Punk is Butters from South Park in thinking that everything he does is cutting edge, never having been done before and yet..."Simpson's did it." In Punk's case, these things have been done before. Hogan, Austin, Bret, they've all done "pipe bomb" type speeches that did not seem worked. I guess because they didn't mention an indy wrestler/former employee that it's forgotten.
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Post by Instant Classic on Dec 19, 2013 9:41:40 GMT -5
For some reason if Ryder did that I don't think I could take him seriously.
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Bad Moon
Unicron
for reasons known only to the goblins that live in my brain
Posts: 3,091
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Post by Bad Moon on Dec 19, 2013 9:50:34 GMT -5
I want Santino to do a shoot promo, but keep the accent on the entire time.
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Post by government mule on Dec 19, 2013 9:56:10 GMT -5
I'm still waiting for the Khali pipebomb to happen. It's only a matter of time before 'BLARGHHHH BLARGGHH BLARGHHH!'
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Post by A Platypus Rave on Dec 19, 2013 10:00:48 GMT -5
I want Santino to do a shoot promo, but keep the accent on the entire time. Yeah, the accent and the goofy pronunciations would be the best worked shoot
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Abdullah
Hank Scorpio
Thank you, Ishmeal Loves Bayley!
Posts: 6,420
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Post by Abdullah on Dec 19, 2013 10:01:10 GMT -5
I don't think Ryder has that much to whine about, objectively. People would still cheer him. People like worked shoots.
He was more creative and even calculating about getting over but lots of guys put in the effort only to have the rug pulled out from under them. Ziggler would be perfect for a shoot like this, if they could work around wins and losses being pre-determined while still keeping kayfabe.
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Deleted
Deleted Member
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Post by Deleted on Dec 19, 2013 10:01:55 GMT -5
If Ryder drops a pipe bomb before a dark match would anyone hear it?
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Post by turkeysandwich on Dec 19, 2013 10:14:44 GMT -5
Ryder would get 10 seconds into it before Eve would return to come out and kick him in the balls, and they'd just cut to commercial and we'd never see Zack again.
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Deleted
Deleted Member
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Post by Deleted on Dec 19, 2013 10:16:57 GMT -5
Sin Cara Pipebomb would be the bomb.com.
*points*
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Post by A Platypus Rave on Dec 19, 2013 10:19:52 GMT -5
Sin Cara Pipebomb would be the bomb.com. *points* wouldn't it be more... *points* *shakes head.* *points!*
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Deleted
Deleted Member
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Post by Deleted on Dec 19, 2013 10:21:01 GMT -5
Sin Cara Pipebomb would be the bomb.com. *points* wouldn't it be more... *points* *shakes head.* *points!* They have to keep it PG. You can't air *shakes head* just like that on WWE TV. Sponsors would leave.
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Deleted
Deleted Member
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Post by Deleted on Dec 19, 2013 10:21:33 GMT -5
Sin Cara Pipebomb would be the bomb.com. *points* I now have the mental image of Sin Cara sitting down on the stage about to cut a scathing promo, when he suddenly looks down and realises he's holding an actual live pipe bomb instead of a microphone.
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Post by Zaq "That Guy" Buzzkill on Dec 19, 2013 10:27:40 GMT -5
Pipebombs for some, miniature WWE flags for others.
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Allie Kitsune
Crow T. Robot
Always Feelin' Foxy.
HaHa U FaLL 4 LaVa TriK
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Post by Allie Kitsune on Dec 19, 2013 10:28:50 GMT -5
Sin Cara Pipebomb would be the bomb.com. *points* I now have the mental image of Sin Cara sitting down on the stage about to cut a scathing promo, when he suddenly looks down and realises he's holding an actual live pipe bomb instead of a microphone. I thought the exact same thing.
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Post by Baldobomb-22-OH-MAN!!! on Dec 19, 2013 12:05:58 GMT -5
Sin Cara: *points... with TWO fingers!*
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543Y2J
Patti Mayonnaise
Seventh level .gif Master
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Post by 543Y2J on Dec 19, 2013 12:08:14 GMT -5
Pimpbombs to all! /classic thread
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Deleted
Deleted Member
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Post by Deleted on Dec 19, 2013 12:27:45 GMT -5
John Cena, brother, while you lay there, hopefully as uncomfortable as you possibly can be, I want you to listen to me, jack.
I want you to digest this because before I leave in 3 weeks with your WWE Championship, I have a lot of things I want to get off my chest, dude.
I don’t hate you, brother. I don’t even dislike you. I do like you. I like you a hell of a lot more than I like most people in the back, jack!
I hate this idea that you’re the best. Because you’re not. I’m the best. I’m the man with the 24-inch pythons, brother. There’s one thing you’re better at than I am and that’s kissing Vince McMahon’s ass.
You’re as good as kissing Vince McMahon’s ass as Steve Austin was. I don’t know if you’re as good as Dwayne though. He’s a pretty good ass kisser, brother. Always was and still is.
Whoops! The Hulkster’s breaking the fourth wall, dude! (waves to the camera)
I am the best wrestler in the world, brother.
I’ve been the best since the day I slammed Andre, jack. I body slammed the 800 lb Andre the Giant in front of 1,000,000 screaming Hulkamaniacs, brother! The Hulkster had an epic confrontation with the Warrior, dude, and he split just like I’m splitting. But the biggest difference between me and Warrior is I’m going to leave with the WWE Championship, dude.
I’ve grabbed so many of Vincent K. McMahon’s brass rings that it’s finally dawned on me that there just that, they’re completely imaginary, jack. The only thing that’s real is me and the power of Hulkamania! All my Hulkamaniacs out there know that for as long as the Hulkster has been around, I have been the best on this microphone, in that ring, and even on commentary, dude! Nobody can touch me!
And yet no matter how many times I prove it, brother, the Hulkster’s not on your lovely little collector cups anymore. I’m not on the cover of the program. I’m barely promoted, jack. I don't get to be in movies anymore. I’m certainly not on any crappy show on the USA Network, dude. I’m not on the poster of WrestleMania. I’m not on the signature that’s produced at the start of the show. I’m not on Conan O’Brian. I’m not on Jimmy Fallon, brother. But the fact of the matter is, I should be, brother.
This isn’t sour grapes, borther. But the fact that Dwayne is in the main event at WrestleMania next year and I’m not makes me and all the Hulkamaniacs out there sick, brother!
Oh hey, let me get something straight. Those of you who are cheering me right now, you are just as big a part of me leaving as anything else. Because you’re not real Hulkamaniacs, dude! You’re the ones who are sipping on those collector cups right now, brother. You’re the ones that buy those programs that my face isn’t on the cover of. And then at five in the morning at the airport, you try to shove it in my face and get an autograph and try to sell it on Ebay because you’re too lazy to go get a real job, jack.
I’m leaving with the WWE Championship on July 17th, brother. And hell, who knows, maybe I’ll go defend it in Jerry Lawler’s Memphis Wrestling. Maybe…I’ll go back to Total Nonstop Action.
(looks at the camera and waves)
Hey, Dixie Carter, how you doing?
The reason I’m leaving is you people, dude. Because after I’m gone, you’re still going to pour money into this company, brother. I’m just a spoke on the wheel, dude. The wheel is going to keep turning and I understand that, jack. Vince McMahon is going to make money despite himself. He’s a millionaire who should be a billionaire. You know why he’s not a billionaire? Because he surrounds himself with vanilla midgets like Daniel Bryan, who couldn’t draw at a wrestling show held in a flea market, brother, and I’d like to think that maybe this company will better after Vince McMahon is dead. But the fact is, it’s going to be taken over by his idiotic daughter and his doofus son-in-law and the rest of his stupid family, jack!
Let me tell you a personal story about Vince McMahon alright. We do this whole anti bully campaign, dude- (mic cut off)
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Post by Confused Mark Wahlberg on Dec 19, 2013 13:13:05 GMT -5
"In its design, Destrucity represents a constellation existing in the heavens which symbolizes the "Eight Disciplines" by which Warriors choose to live their lives. Brought to existence by the destinies of those willing to die for their Beliefs, brought to exist as a place where people live by Belief in the evolution of their Higher Selves-constantly evolving toward a completion of their chosen destiny-all with strength in the denial of "System Beliefs"-the very Beliefs that amplify differences in and create rights, wrongs, judgements, and opinions of people, places, and things."
~drops mic~
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