ibdude
Don Corleone
Posts: 1,706
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Post by ibdude on Dec 19, 2014 14:42:24 GMT -5
I've tried okcupid, pof, and tinder for years and haven't gotten a date out of any of those sites. It sucks.
I've put up handsome pictures, tried writing funny things in my bio, tried writing messages to girls taking about things in their bio, messaged an inordinate amount of girls to get one to talk to me (some do but it never goes anywhere), etc.
Anybody got any advice on how to succeed?
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Post by Digital Witness on Dec 19, 2014 14:59:24 GMT -5
I knew a guy who married someone he met online. She turned out to be bat shit insane. I know there are exceptions, but I've heard so many horror stories that I'd never date online regardless of how desperate I ever became.
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Post by MC Blowfish on Dec 19, 2014 15:18:12 GMT -5
I met my wife on Ok Cupid. I sent her a funny message and she liked it. My advice would be to keep sending messages. Remember those sites tend to have more guys then women, so you have to keep going and try to stand out.
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Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
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Post by Deleted on Dec 19, 2014 15:43:12 GMT -5
Try to be as rando as possible. People send/recieve a ton of "hey how ya doin/I saw on your profile that.../love your pic/etc" so I think you gotta do something to stand out.
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ibdude
Don Corleone
Posts: 1,706
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Post by ibdude on Dec 19, 2014 15:44:29 GMT -5
Try to be as rando as possible. People send/recieve a ton of "hey how ya doin/I saw on your profile that.../love your pic/etc" so I think you gotta do something to stand out. Can you give me a few examples?
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Post by fuzzywarble, squat cobbler on Dec 19, 2014 15:44:33 GMT -5
Just go to a public setting where there are tons of girls who are into stuff that you're into. One of them is bound to have a connection with you. Sure beats online dating, IMO
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Post by MC Blowfish on Dec 19, 2014 16:03:04 GMT -5
Try to be as rando as possible. People send/recieve a ton of "hey how ya doin/I saw on your profile that.../love your pic/etc" so I think you gotta do something to stand out. Can you give me a few examples? Ask detailed questions about something on their profile. For example, my wife was a Christian Educator when we met, and I asked her an indepth question which I can't remember now. That really stood out to her when I messaged her.
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Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
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Post by Deleted on Dec 19, 2014 16:14:35 GMT -5
A lot of it is probably in your profile. Any chance you could remove any personal details and post a bit of it here? Maybe show the kind of messages you send?
I do solid in online dating, going out with a girl tonight I met on POF. I actually don't agree with the "Try to be as rando" as possible approach. Tailoring is important. Find something on their profile that's unique, respond to that. If they have a profile without a jumping on point, i.e. the kind of people who post "Message me if you want to know!" in their about me than ignore them. They're useless.
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The Unconquered Sun
King Koopa
He has no pants! What a heathen!
Lord of Storms and Kittens!
Posts: 11,548
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Post by The Unconquered Sun on Dec 19, 2014 16:23:12 GMT -5
Lie, lie, lie, lie and when youre done, lie some more.
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Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
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Post by Deleted on Dec 19, 2014 16:36:18 GMT -5
Try to be as rando as possible. People send/recieve a ton of "hey how ya doin/I saw on your profile that.../love your pic/etc" so I think you gotta do something to stand out. Can you give me a few examples? It varies with each person, but when I was on PoF 5-6 years ago I saw one girl was doing something with child psychology or something to do with educating children so I sent her a message with this story/fable I learned as a kid and what it meant to me. Just something unexpeced, but not SHOCKING or EXTREME, just something earnest that shows you're a person and not just another profile.
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Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
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Post by Deleted on Dec 19, 2014 16:47:12 GMT -5
Honestly, the attractiveness factor seems to play heavily into the equation. There was an OKCupid study that said female users rated 80% of male users with 'below-average' attractiveness (http://blog.okcupid.com/index.php/your-looks-and-online-dating/). That said, you just have to keep at it. Better messages can help, but if they're into you they're into you.
Took me quite a while, but my current GF was someone I met on OKC and she's dope. So best of luck, it can work for you. I'm not some heartthrob either.
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Post by "I'm Batman..." on Dec 19, 2014 17:50:56 GMT -5
Honestly, the attractiveness factor seems to play heavily into the equation. There was an OKCupid study that said female users rated 80% of male users with 'below-average' attractiveness (http://blog.okcupid.com/index.php/your-looks-and-online-dating/). That said, you just have to keep at it. Better messages can help, but if they're into you they're into you. Took me quite a while, but my current GF was someone I met on OKC and she's dope. So best of luck, it can work for you. I'm not some heartthrob either. This is why I don't spend too much time on messages, it seems like a game of luck.
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Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
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Post by Deleted on Dec 19, 2014 17:54:54 GMT -5
Had moderate success on POF currently I'm dating a girl from POF. I saw how her POF profile looked like from the inside and it's terryfing. Like there's a 1000 meet me's and thousands of messages to click. Basically girls don't actively creep profiles because the messages keep coming so basically have a picture that looks good and stands out on a tiny thumbnail, message something funny/clever/ask a question regarding her profile usually, and make your profile detailed, organized, but not too long. Have some pics that stand out.
Otherwise good luck and hope for the best.
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Professor Chaos
Bill S. Preston, Esq.
Bringer of Destruction and Maker of Doom
Posts: 16,332
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Post by Professor Chaos on Dec 19, 2014 18:08:41 GMT -5
I was on POF for 8 years and a few months ago they deleted my profile. When I emailed customer service asking why they told me they couldn't disclose that information. Jerks. I actually got a lot of dates on there over the years.
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Sephiroth
Wade Wilson
Surviving
Posts: 28,894
Member is Online
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Post by Sephiroth on Dec 19, 2014 18:25:45 GMT -5
Do I even have to say it?
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Post by RadcapRadsley on Dec 19, 2014 19:32:43 GMT -5
The difference btwn meeting girls from dating sites and being ignored by them can be because of the tiniest things. One mistake I notice some dudes make is their ok cupid profile looks more like an instragram/live journal account. The thing is girls will look for the most random reasons to discount a dude so keep your profile short and cut to the core of the best of you and why you would make a good partner.
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Hawk Hart
Bill S. Preston, Esq.
Sold his organs.
The Best There Is, the Best There Was, and the Best That There Ever Will Be
Posts: 15,296
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Post by Hawk Hart on Dec 19, 2014 19:39:05 GMT -5
I met an attractive, nerdy young lady and got her number just this week. Stick with it or bail, your call but the shit works.
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agent817
Fry's dog Seymour
Doesn't Know Whose Ring It Is
Posts: 21,159
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Post by agent817 on Dec 19, 2014 23:51:22 GMT -5
Some of the time it depends with me. For a while now, I've been talking to some girl with whom I feel I might have hit it off. However, she lives miles away from me.
Also, I try to be cool when talking to women. I even got a number a few months ago from some woman who is older than me at school but may be separated, which I am not sure if I should try pursuing. I haven't talked to her in a while, though. I should try talking to her to see how she has been or something.
One thing that I will say is that I was talking to some girl and I was able to sense that she had lost interest because of her replies to me. I don't know if I should keep her number in my phone.
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Post by rapidfire187 on Dec 20, 2014 1:44:48 GMT -5
I've dated almost nothing but crazy chicks that I met online and offline. That has to say something about myself, right?
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Cranjis McBasketball
Crow T. Robot
Knew what the hell that thing was supposed to be
Peace Love and Nothing But
Posts: 41,891
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Post by Cranjis McBasketball on Dec 20, 2014 3:37:15 GMT -5
I've tried okcupid, pof, and tinder for years and haven't gotten a date out of any of those sites. It sucks. I've put up handsome pictures, tried writing funny things in my bio, tried writing messages to girls taking about things in their bio, messaged an inordinate amount of girls to get one to talk to me (some do but it never goes anywhere), etc. Anybody got any advice on how to succeed? I noticed all those sites you mentioned, which I have tried myself, are all free and I realized on them a long time ago, "You get what you pay for". There are some bat shit insane people floating around out there and free tends to attract them. Then I wondered what that said about me.....so yeah, I deleted those profiles and will just try and people the old fashioned way, arranged marriage.
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