Post by mizerable on Feb 13, 2017 23:54:22 GMT -5
I was usually the new kid in elementary school. Not only that but every year I somehow ended up in a different class the next year from all my friends. I was somewhat sheltered and didn't have name brand clothes, so while I wasn't bullied like I was later on, I wasn't ever liked that much however now that I think about it, I was friends or associated with a lot of people from 4th to 5th grade.
Middle school? New school, I didn't know anyone again. Very diverse however there were racial issues at times and just everyone was going through those wild changes with puberty and being in a bigger school. I started from the bottom again and this started my habit of not putting my studies first. Made some good friends who would all go their separate ways by high school, however it helped me cope with some of the worst bullying I ever endured. I was guilty of dishing this out as well in what felt like a dog eat dog environment. I got in a few fights, got suspended a couple times, but survived. That was crucial since suicide felt like a better option a lot of those times. Also I thought about sex during just about every waking moment I had, which didn't help my problems.
High school, I was immature early on, therefore not making a good impression with women thus driving me to act out even more. I had friends of all social orders, however I was really only close with 3...all of whom didn't really get along. The bullying stopped, I made amends with a lot of people. I skipped a lot of school to go smoke pot or just not be there. I closed myself off from a lot of people, especially since by association of another friend most people knew I smoked pot with two of the coolest people in school, however I still couldn't get laid. Hell, I couldn't even get a girl to date me, even though I wasn't a bad looking guy. I was known by everyone, for better or worse. I finally list my virginity 6 months before I graduated to a girl who didn't go to my school...and at least it helped me focus on other things. I can't stress how much I worried about sex for those agonizing 7 years. I was voted "most unpunctual" during senior year...I wasn't there to accept the award because I was cleaning up the chaos that happened the night before at senior kegger. I also chose not to go to prom, although I almost had it cancelled due to the senior prank I was in on, that they never found out who did it.
My grades were what I put into them. If I cared, I tried. If not, it didn't matter.
College was the best. By that point, I didn't have to worry about social order, could just do my thing without worrying about consequences. This is where I started putting my priorities in order.
Middle school? New school, I didn't know anyone again. Very diverse however there were racial issues at times and just everyone was going through those wild changes with puberty and being in a bigger school. I started from the bottom again and this started my habit of not putting my studies first. Made some good friends who would all go their separate ways by high school, however it helped me cope with some of the worst bullying I ever endured. I was guilty of dishing this out as well in what felt like a dog eat dog environment. I got in a few fights, got suspended a couple times, but survived. That was crucial since suicide felt like a better option a lot of those times. Also I thought about sex during just about every waking moment I had, which didn't help my problems.
High school, I was immature early on, therefore not making a good impression with women thus driving me to act out even more. I had friends of all social orders, however I was really only close with 3...all of whom didn't really get along. The bullying stopped, I made amends with a lot of people. I skipped a lot of school to go smoke pot or just not be there. I closed myself off from a lot of people, especially since by association of another friend most people knew I smoked pot with two of the coolest people in school, however I still couldn't get laid. Hell, I couldn't even get a girl to date me, even though I wasn't a bad looking guy. I was known by everyone, for better or worse. I finally list my virginity 6 months before I graduated to a girl who didn't go to my school...and at least it helped me focus on other things. I can't stress how much I worried about sex for those agonizing 7 years. I was voted "most unpunctual" during senior year...I wasn't there to accept the award because I was cleaning up the chaos that happened the night before at senior kegger. I also chose not to go to prom, although I almost had it cancelled due to the senior prank I was in on, that they never found out who did it.
My grades were what I put into them. If I cared, I tried. If not, it didn't matter.
College was the best. By that point, I didn't have to worry about social order, could just do my thing without worrying about consequences. This is where I started putting my priorities in order.
