msc
Dennis Stamp
Posts: 4,484
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Post by msc on Jun 23, 2018 2:52:24 GMT -5
There's a jobber match from 96 where Lawler commentates on his own match complete with headset. I thought that was hilarious as a kid.
Also, the matches when we really riled up JR. Survivor Series 99 has a good one. Austin has just been run over, and it's back to Edge and Christian and the Hardy Boys v the Hollys and Too Cool in a Survivor match. (Quite a fun wee match, actually!) Anyhow, JR is selling the gravity of the pre-match angle, and apologises for his heart not being in it. "Your supposed to be a broadcast journalist, do your job!" King keeps chiding JR for not putting emotion into the match, and then as it builds up some nice Hardys action, JR goes into JR Mode for a bit of action and King quickly goes "That's a bit heartless, your best friend in the hospital and here you are enjoying a wrestling match!" Funnier in context.
He's also really good in the 97 rumble match, veering from standard insensitivity to the brilliant cameo ("it takes a King") and its the punchline, his 100% defence of Austin and Owen as enemies of my enemy, some really funny lines ("He's a promising young singer, I wish he'd promise to stop singing!"), pointing out the flaws in the match, rooting for people to rip off Mil Mascaras's mask, rooting for the entire ring to beat up Bret, his sheer joy at Rocky Maivia who'd beaten him previously "making a rookie mistake!" and being eliminated, and a random moment where he analyses the field remaining. "Comes to down to Undertaker vs anyone, Undertaker wins. Hitman and Austin, the Hitman. Terry Funk and Big Daddy Cool..." And note he's writing off the actual winner there for the casual viewers subconscious. "Bret Hart should be suspended for life!" giving Vince ideas for later in the year. He's clearly having a lot of fun.
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Post by atgnatpodcast on Jun 23, 2018 13:03:50 GMT -5
Pretty sure he said chyna looked like she was breast fed by her dad...
Killed me
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Post by Yacht Persona on Jun 23, 2018 15:55:05 GMT -5
(Referring to Tazz) "He looks a lot bigger on the Lucky Charms box."
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Post by crowley1986 on Jun 23, 2018 17:47:54 GMT -5
(Referring to Tazz) "He looks a lot bigger on the Lucky Charms box." JBL's best line was on Tazz, When Hornswoggle won the cruiserweight title, "He's the shortest champion since Tazz"
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Post by Natural Born Farmer on Jun 23, 2018 17:49:28 GMT -5
He had a line about thinking judo was what bagels were made out of once. I laughed way harder than I should have at it.
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Nikki Heyman
Fry's dog Seymour
EXTREEEEEME Pony Manager
✬ Believe In The Fight ✬
Posts: 24,018
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Post by Nikki Heyman on Jun 23, 2018 18:44:28 GMT -5
He had a line about thinking judo was what bagels were made out of once. I laughed way harder than I should have at it. Was Uncle Paul at the table? He would have appreciated that
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67 more
King Koopa
He's just a Sexy Kurt
Posts: 11,544
Member is Online
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Post by 67 more on Jun 24, 2018 1:17:51 GMT -5
There was a match between Val Venis and Dick Togo and I had a lot of material but Dustin Runnels had to come out here to talk about the Bible You've got one of those Bill Clinton computers: a six inch floppy, a harddrive, and no memory Michael Cole: "JR get well soon we all want you back." Jerry Lawler: "I really want you back." I cant remember what he said, but during an XPac Kane cage match, he nearly died when JR said Penis....and me and my brother couldn't stop laughing at him Jr: Can you stop with all these penis innuendos? king: JR, you said penis! JR: Well, that's what you're getting at!
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Post by captainhindsite on Jun 24, 2018 3:00:27 GMT -5
Tell you what, Lawler as the mouthpiece for some new team or monster heel would still be money. Lawler with revival would be awesome
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Post by thelonewolf527 on Jun 24, 2018 4:06:34 GMT -5
Road Dogg: "Since I'm the D-O-Double-G, we wanna see, her puppies!" King: "What?! S-see her puppies, yes!" JR: "Well I don't think this is an official stipulation." King: "Why not?! I like it I like it. That's a good stipulation!"
And then 20 seconds into the match, Owen's just doing a regular corner spot with Road Dogg:
King: "GET UP ROAD DOGG YOU IDIOT! MAKE A COMEBACK, DO SOMETHING!"
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Post by thetower52 on Jun 24, 2018 7:32:23 GMT -5
I'm a huge sucker for all the variations of his Red Headed Girlfriend joke. "I dated a redhead once, no hair just a red head" Such a lame dad joke but I still laugh every time I have never understood this joke Someone please explain it
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Post by jivesoulbrah on Jun 24, 2018 9:36:42 GMT -5
During a random Yokozuna vs jobber squash match on Superstars, Lawler had sent a request earlier in the week to the WWF Birthday hotline where you can enter someone’s name and a superstar will leave a voicemail singing “Happy Birthday” with their name in it. Well he put the name “Helen” for Bret Hart’s Mom and OF ALL PEOPLE it’s The Undertaker and Paul Bearer singing happy birthday!! He has them replay it like 2-3 times and he totally breaks character and laughs hysterically. It’s honestly the funniest thing I’ve ever seen in WWF/E
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