Post by thegame415 on Mar 6, 2019 16:59:17 GMT -5
Pre Show:
Andrade vs Rey Mysterio
Andrade rips off Mysterio's mask and rolls him up for the win. After the match, Dasha tries to interview him, but he yells that he's a short piece of crap and walks away.
1. Boss n Hug Connection vs Nia Jax and Tamina
During the match, Sasha hits a move on Tamina and her top falls off. She covers Tamina, and herself, for the win. Sasha losing cloting becomes an ongoing trend.
Backstage, Dasha questions Miz and Shane if they plan on turning on one another. Shane says he wouldn't do that to Mike.
Backstage, Triple H announces he'll be the special referee for the Becky/Charlotte match.
2. Asuka vs Mandy Rose
Akira Tozawa comes to the ring and starts arguing with Asuka. He shows her a condom with holes punched in it. Rose rolls up Asuka and wins the title.
Backstage, Jeff Hardy and Randy Orton get in a brawl with Nakamura and Rusev. Graves says "we gotta get those guys on the show somehow, right?"
Backstage, Stephanie announces herself as the special enforcer for the main event.
3. The Revival vs Black and Richochet vs Roode and Gable
The teams are each referred to as team A, E or W by the announcers. Braun Strowman comes out in a WWE shirt and lays them all out.
Backstage, Lio Rush says he has proof Reigns faked his diagnosis.
Backstage, Vince McMahon announces he is the special timekeeper for the main event.
4. Usos vs Miz and McMahon
After a ref bump, Miz hits a skull crushing finale on Jey when, oh my gosh, the ultimate swerve, Mr. Mizanin hits his son in the back of his head with a title. Jimmy hits a splash for the win.
Backstage, Mr. Mizanin, flanked by the Bellas, leaves in a limo.
Backstage, Kevin Owens eats Taco Bell. He says this is his pre-match ritual. Uhoh, he runs for the bathroom.
5. Daniel Bryan vs Kevin Owens
Owens music plays, but he doesn't come out. He has pre-match diarrhea. Bryan tells the crowd that's what happens when youre not healthy. A bunch of "crap" falls from the roof and onto Bryan. Owens runs out and the match starts, them fighting in a ring of poop. AJ Styles hits both guys with a chair, ending the match. He gets on the mic and complains about getting left off the show when he's the biggest star ever. A light of a star of David shines down, and he reveals himself to be AJ Sylesberg.
Lio Rush announces the Reigns lied, and the real procedure he had done is on video. He plays a clip of someone wearing a cutout of Reigns face over theres at a doctors office, where they announce they successfully "removed his testicles".
6. Shield vs Baron Corbin, Drew McIntyre and Lashley
The match is a wild brawl that never gets started. They brawl to the backstage area, where the lights go off. When they turn on, none of them are there, except Undertaker who says "BOO!"
7. Charlotte vs Becky Lynch
Becky knocks out Steph and Vince at one point in the match. Triple H pedigrees Becky, but Batista comes out and Batista bombs HHH. He puts on the referee shirt, but counts out Becky. Charlotte wins.
Andrade vs Rey Mysterio
Andrade rips off Mysterio's mask and rolls him up for the win. After the match, Dasha tries to interview him, but he yells that he's a short piece of crap and walks away.
1. Boss n Hug Connection vs Nia Jax and Tamina
During the match, Sasha hits a move on Tamina and her top falls off. She covers Tamina, and herself, for the win. Sasha losing cloting becomes an ongoing trend.
Backstage, Dasha questions Miz and Shane if they plan on turning on one another. Shane says he wouldn't do that to Mike.
Backstage, Triple H announces he'll be the special referee for the Becky/Charlotte match.
2. Asuka vs Mandy Rose
Akira Tozawa comes to the ring and starts arguing with Asuka. He shows her a condom with holes punched in it. Rose rolls up Asuka and wins the title.
Backstage, Jeff Hardy and Randy Orton get in a brawl with Nakamura and Rusev. Graves says "we gotta get those guys on the show somehow, right?"
Backstage, Stephanie announces herself as the special enforcer for the main event.
3. The Revival vs Black and Richochet vs Roode and Gable
The teams are each referred to as team A, E or W by the announcers. Braun Strowman comes out in a WWE shirt and lays them all out.
Backstage, Lio Rush says he has proof Reigns faked his diagnosis.
Backstage, Vince McMahon announces he is the special timekeeper for the main event.
4. Usos vs Miz and McMahon
After a ref bump, Miz hits a skull crushing finale on Jey when, oh my gosh, the ultimate swerve, Mr. Mizanin hits his son in the back of his head with a title. Jimmy hits a splash for the win.
Backstage, Mr. Mizanin, flanked by the Bellas, leaves in a limo.
Backstage, Kevin Owens eats Taco Bell. He says this is his pre-match ritual. Uhoh, he runs for the bathroom.
5. Daniel Bryan vs Kevin Owens
Owens music plays, but he doesn't come out. He has pre-match diarrhea. Bryan tells the crowd that's what happens when youre not healthy. A bunch of "crap" falls from the roof and onto Bryan. Owens runs out and the match starts, them fighting in a ring of poop. AJ Styles hits both guys with a chair, ending the match. He gets on the mic and complains about getting left off the show when he's the biggest star ever. A light of a star of David shines down, and he reveals himself to be AJ Sylesberg.
Lio Rush announces the Reigns lied, and the real procedure he had done is on video. He plays a clip of someone wearing a cutout of Reigns face over theres at a doctors office, where they announce they successfully "removed his testicles".
6. Shield vs Baron Corbin, Drew McIntyre and Lashley
The match is a wild brawl that never gets started. They brawl to the backstage area, where the lights go off. When they turn on, none of them are there, except Undertaker who says "BOO!"
7. Charlotte vs Becky Lynch
Becky knocks out Steph and Vince at one point in the match. Triple H pedigrees Becky, but Batista comes out and Batista bombs HHH. He puts on the referee shirt, but counts out Becky. Charlotte wins.