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Post by Dave the Dave on Jun 24, 2019 13:09:31 GMT -5
What kind of things would he say? Imagine prime heel Jerry Lawler or goofy awful face. What would he make you wince with?
I started this thread solely imagining him exclaiming “Seth Rollins is sleeping with the man!” at the end of the PPV last night.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jun 24, 2019 13:21:19 GMT -5
LOOK AT ALEXA'S PUPPIES
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jun 24, 2019 13:30:02 GMT -5
He'd make awful and tired jokes to "I actually hate this f***ing guy" fake laughter from the other commentators.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jun 24, 2019 15:36:46 GMT -5
You could literally put a goose on commentary and it would be worlds better than what we have now.
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Matt
El Dandy
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Post by Matt on Jun 24, 2019 16:20:30 GMT -5
He would be better than Renee
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Post by Stone Coke Miami Watson 🥃 on Jun 24, 2019 16:35:05 GMT -5
Commentary would miraculously suck more so than usual...no offense to his fans, but his commentary has always been atrocious
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jun 24, 2019 16:42:38 GMT -5
Commentary would miraculously suck more so than usual...no offense to his fans, but his commentary has always been atrocious Watching the Network, Lawler started sucking as early as 2000 IMO. His commentary was just downright mute worthy at times, especially whenever Chyna and Eddie would show up.
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Post by Stone Coke Miami Watson 🥃 on Jun 24, 2019 16:57:52 GMT -5
Commentary would miraculously suck more so than usual...no offense to his fans, but his commentary has always been atrocious Watching the Network, Lawler started sucking as early as 2000 IMO. His commentary was just downright mute worthy at times, especially whenever Chyna and Eddie would show up. Dude....don’t even get me started on him saying “Latino Heat” or “mamacita”....Lawler is the only one who could make a Guerrero match unwatchable.
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Post by "Gizzark" Mike Wronglevenay on Jun 24, 2019 17:06:29 GMT -5
'I can't believe these women have been wrestling for 20 minutes already and I haven't seen one damn nipple yet.'
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Post by DSR on Jun 24, 2019 17:26:16 GMT -5
I imagine he'd make innuendos about eating Mexican food while Zelina Vega is walking down the ramp.
I'm well aware she's Puerto Rican, but Lawler referred to TAKA Michinoku as Chinese when he was clotheslined out of the Royal Rumble that one time, so I would't put it past him to not know or care about the difference.
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Chiral
Salacious Crumb
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Post by Chiral on Jun 24, 2019 17:29:56 GMT -5
I shudder imagining his WM35 Kofi vs. Bryan commentary to be like his Booker vs. HHH commentary.
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Post by Aceorton on Jun 24, 2019 17:57:45 GMT -5
"Roman Reigns is the Big Dog, huh? Well, that explains all the fleas!"
[crickets]
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fw91
Patti Mayonnaise
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Post by fw91 on Jun 24, 2019 18:19:38 GMT -5
He wouldn’t give a shit about anything. Which is a shame because all puppies jokes aside, an invested King is up there with the best of them at commentary.
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Post by Deleted on Jun 24, 2019 18:28:28 GMT -5
“All these people booing John Cena are just jealous because they can’t lift as much weights as he does.”
I always laugh when I hear that.
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Post by Cyno on Jun 24, 2019 18:31:24 GMT -5
Don't you wish that evil on me.
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Venti
Unicron
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Post by Venti on Jun 24, 2019 18:35:29 GMT -5
He wouldn’t give a shit about anything. Which is a shame because all puppies jokes aside, an invested King is up there with the best of them at commentary. To me, mid 90s to 2000 Jerry is my favorite color commentator. Maybe not as good as Heenan or maybe Ventura, but I consider him to be one of the voices of my childhood and he had great chemistry with JR and Vince. Jerry post 2001 comeback: pretty much a downward spiral. I love the guy and he's a legend, but you can tell when he doesn't care. Still, even in his current state I'd take him over what they've got now any day. I love when they bring him back for Rumble matches and whatnot. Plus, he gives us gifts like "maybe next week, YOU won't be around!"
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jun 24, 2019 22:13:49 GMT -5
Commentary would miraculously suck more so than usual...no offense to his fans, but his commentary has always been atrocious Amen. Post-Invasion Lawler was just dreadful on the mic, considering what a kiss-ass he was about heels while condemning everything a babyface does, and I know that people will go "But Ventura and Heenan…", and I'll go, "Yeah, but they gave the good guys their due, albeit so begrudgingly", and still being his perverted self, before turning face and becoming John Cena's #1 fan. I was in the minority and thought his heel work before leaving SmackDown was godawful.
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Post by Tiger Millionaire on Jun 24, 2019 22:56:49 GMT -5
I'd stick Q-Tips in my ears until they bled.
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schma
Hank Scorpio
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Post by schma on Jun 25, 2019 1:31:08 GMT -5
If I never hear that guy yelling about puppies again it will be too soon. I hated his commentary even when he was with J.R.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jun 25, 2019 6:54:18 GMT -5
He was great as a heel commentator. I always found him and JR's back and forth entertaining.
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