Post by angryfan on Jan 24, 2009 5:27:47 GMT -5
Been too long, so I figured it was time to do another one. I'm still working out how to do this with some of the central characters gone, so lemme know if anyone has any ideas. Regardless, here goes nothing.
(Scene opens with Orton pacing backstage post-RAW, as Cody looks on)
Orton: Damn, damn it, I am so screwed.
Cody: Man, I’m sure it’ll be fine, but why the hell did you do it?
Orton: I don’t know, I think I might be going insane.
Cody: Is it because you hear voices in your head?
Orton: (staring) Are you an idiot?
Cody: What? It’s in the song, so I just kinda figured…
Orton: Well stop, it’s not working out for you. And no, it’s not voices, it’s just that –
(Orton stops talking as Edge enters the room)
Edge: Hey Randy, nice shot tonight.
Orton: Shut UP! This is all your fault, I hope you know that.
Edge: My fault? How is it my fault? I work on SmackDown, how the hell did I cause you to do this?
Orton: Because…(whispering) everyone looks like Matt Hardy to me now.
Edge: What?
Orton: (loudly, in a frustrated voice) I said because everyone looks like Matt Hardy, alright? When I get mad, it just…it just happens.
Edge: (grinning) You’re joking, right?
Orton: Do I look like I’m joking to you?
Edge: Lemme test something, close your eyes for a minute. (Orton closes his eyes) Hey Cody?
Cody: Yeah?
Edge: (handing over a Matt Hardy mask) Put this on.
Cody: No, absolutely not. You think I’m that stupid.
(Edge stares blankly at him)
Cody: Oh fine! (he puts on the mask)
Edge: OK, Randy, open ‘em up.
(Orton opens his eyes and sees Cody with the Hardy mask, then goes ballistic and punts Cody in the head, knocking the mask off)
Orton: Oh my God, you see? You see what you did to me? You bastard, you have no soul!
Edge: (going on as if Orton has said nothing) This is totally awesome, man, we have to try this some more!
Orton: NO! I’m not going to do that. Besides, you get laughs and I probably go to jail. What the hell could possibly make me want to do this?
Edge: Well…I got a box of Nutty Bars and a carton of Lucky Strikes in the other room if that’ll help.
Orton: Deal!
(the two shake as the scene ends)
(Scene opens with Steph and Trips sitting in an office, with Steph looking crestfallen and Trips absent-mindedly playing chess with Sledgie)
Steph: Hunter, what am I going to do?
HHH: I know, Steph, I mean, I’m nearly in checkmate here, and I have no idea how to get out of it.
Steph: (frustrated) I was talking about my dad, Hunter.
HHH: Look, he’s rich, I’m sure the stock market situation won’t hurt him that badly.
Steph: Hunter, he got kicked in the head, were you even paying attention?
HHH: Well…um, yes? Is that the right answer?
Steph: (glaring) Hunter.
HHH: OK, fine, so I was distracted. It’s not my fault, you know. I mean, I’ve been on Smack Down for a while now, and it’s just not the same. Plus, ever since Naitch disappeared, I just feel lost. Worst of all, I keep begging the milk people to put his picture on a carton, but they won’t. Hell, look at what they put on instead.
(HHH holds up a milk carton with Have You Seen Me? Printed above a picture of Christopher Daniels)
Steph: Look, I’m worried about him too, but I’m sure he’ll turn up. Now can we please focus on my dad?
HHH: OK, fine. He got kicked in the head, and I know it probably hurt, but I’ve beaten him up worse than that, right?
Steph: (reluctantly) Welll…yes, but still…
HHH: Look, I know you’re worried, but just tru –
(HHH is interrupted by Hornswoggle entering the room)
HHH: (Excitedly) CRUISERWIGHT!
(HHH hurriedly Pedigrees Hornswoggle and then returns to his game of chess)
Steph: Hunter, I’m going to go check on my dad, I’ll be back, later, alright?
HHH: (concentrating on the chess board, he moves a pawn) Fine, have fun.
Steph: (glaring) Fun? You think this will be fun?
HHH: OK, I’m sorry. Figure of speech.
(HHH looks back at the board to see he is now in checkmate)
HHH: Damn it! You cheated! (pointing at Sledgie) Steph, he cheated!
Steph: No he didn’t, it was a legal move.
(Sledgie as always says nothing, but leans to one side)
HHH: Fine! I might as well come with you since he’s just gong to cheat at chess.
(the two leave the room as the scene ends)
(Scene changes to Kendrick and Ezekial Jackson by what appears to be a giant plastic bubble, with Jackson having one foot inside)
Jackson: I feel like a complete idiot. What I am supposed to do with a plastic bubble?
Kendrick: Hey hey, that’s THE plastic bubble, I’ll have you know.
Jackson: Fine, THE plastic bubble. But what am I gonna do with it?
Kendrick: (shrugging) run around?
Jackson: But I can’t fit in it. You have any other ideas?
Kendrick: How are you at backflips?
Jackson: (staring) What do you think?
Kendrick: (sighing) This is going to be difficult.
(Orton and Edge enter the area)
Kendrick: Hey guys, how’s it going?
Edge: Dude, you’ve gotta hear this.
Kendrick: What?
(Edge wanders over and holds the Hardy mask in front of Kendrick’s face)
Edge: Hey Randy, look!
Orton: (looking up) HARDYYYYYYYYYYY! (he runs over and throws Kendrick to the ground, kicking him in the head, then jumps back looking mortified) Damn it, not again!
Edge: (grinning and looking at Jackson) Cool isn’t it?
Jackson: I guess. Does this mean I don’t have to get in the plastic bubble?
Edge: Um, yes?
Jackson: Good. (he begins to pull his leg out, then shrugs, climbs in all the way, and rolls off)
(scene changes to Steph and Trips standing in a makeshift infirmary with Vince in a hospital bed)
Steph: Dad? Daddy? Can you hear me?
Vince: Of course I can.
Steph: (Exhaling loudly) Good, I was worried. How are you feeling?
Vince: I’m fine, why?
Steph: Well, you did get kicked in the head.
Vince: I did?
Steph: Well…yes. Orton kicked you, don’t you remember that?
Vince: (puzzled) I don’t understand, why would Bob Orton kick me I the head instead of hitting me with a cast?
Steph: No, no, not Bob, it was Randy.
Vince: (looking more confused and furrowing his brow) Randy? Randy who? You’re not making sense.
Steph: Randy is Bob’s son, you know that.
Vince: That’s ridiculous, stop pulling my leg. Now where’s Patterson?
(Patterson pops his head in the room)
Patterson: Right here, boss.
Vince: Good, good. Now Pat, listen, we’ve got work to do, and just because I’m in a hospital bed. Besides, I know you’ve got that Rumble something or other idea you want to try, so we need to hammer out the details.(to Steph) Honey, would you and Mr Valentine please excuse us while we discuss business?
HHH: What? Mr. Valentine?
Vince: Look, Hammer, I know you’ve been with us a long time, but this is business, so could you excuse us for a moment?
HHH: My name is Triple H, not Greg Valentine.
Vince: (stares for a moment then starts laughing) That’s a good one, Hammer, but seriously. We need a moment to figure out how we can bring this new concept off right.
HHH: New concept? But it’s been around for over twenty years!
Vince: WHAT? Are you accusing me of stealing ideas?
HHH: Well, no, but –
Vince: GET OUT!
(Steph and Trips depart, with Steph looking more worried than ever and Trips giggling)
HHH: (once the door is closed) I think somebody punched his reset button.
Steph: (glaring) Will you stop?
(the ghost of Gorilla Monsoon enters and points at Steph)
Gorilla: That’s gimmick infringement, young lady, and if it doesn’t cease, I will punch your friend there right in the occipital protuberance!
(Monsoon departs as the scene ends)
(Scene opens with Orton pacing backstage post-RAW, as Cody looks on)
Orton: Damn, damn it, I am so screwed.
Cody: Man, I’m sure it’ll be fine, but why the hell did you do it?
Orton: I don’t know, I think I might be going insane.
Cody: Is it because you hear voices in your head?
Orton: (staring) Are you an idiot?
Cody: What? It’s in the song, so I just kinda figured…
Orton: Well stop, it’s not working out for you. And no, it’s not voices, it’s just that –
(Orton stops talking as Edge enters the room)
Edge: Hey Randy, nice shot tonight.
Orton: Shut UP! This is all your fault, I hope you know that.
Edge: My fault? How is it my fault? I work on SmackDown, how the hell did I cause you to do this?
Orton: Because…(whispering) everyone looks like Matt Hardy to me now.
Edge: What?
Orton: (loudly, in a frustrated voice) I said because everyone looks like Matt Hardy, alright? When I get mad, it just…it just happens.
Edge: (grinning) You’re joking, right?
Orton: Do I look like I’m joking to you?
Edge: Lemme test something, close your eyes for a minute. (Orton closes his eyes) Hey Cody?
Cody: Yeah?
Edge: (handing over a Matt Hardy mask) Put this on.
Cody: No, absolutely not. You think I’m that stupid.
(Edge stares blankly at him)
Cody: Oh fine! (he puts on the mask)
Edge: OK, Randy, open ‘em up.
(Orton opens his eyes and sees Cody with the Hardy mask, then goes ballistic and punts Cody in the head, knocking the mask off)
Orton: Oh my God, you see? You see what you did to me? You bastard, you have no soul!
Edge: (going on as if Orton has said nothing) This is totally awesome, man, we have to try this some more!
Orton: NO! I’m not going to do that. Besides, you get laughs and I probably go to jail. What the hell could possibly make me want to do this?
Edge: Well…I got a box of Nutty Bars and a carton of Lucky Strikes in the other room if that’ll help.
Orton: Deal!
(the two shake as the scene ends)
(Scene opens with Steph and Trips sitting in an office, with Steph looking crestfallen and Trips absent-mindedly playing chess with Sledgie)
Steph: Hunter, what am I going to do?
HHH: I know, Steph, I mean, I’m nearly in checkmate here, and I have no idea how to get out of it.
Steph: (frustrated) I was talking about my dad, Hunter.
HHH: Look, he’s rich, I’m sure the stock market situation won’t hurt him that badly.
Steph: Hunter, he got kicked in the head, were you even paying attention?
HHH: Well…um, yes? Is that the right answer?
Steph: (glaring) Hunter.
HHH: OK, fine, so I was distracted. It’s not my fault, you know. I mean, I’ve been on Smack Down for a while now, and it’s just not the same. Plus, ever since Naitch disappeared, I just feel lost. Worst of all, I keep begging the milk people to put his picture on a carton, but they won’t. Hell, look at what they put on instead.
(HHH holds up a milk carton with Have You Seen Me? Printed above a picture of Christopher Daniels)
Steph: Look, I’m worried about him too, but I’m sure he’ll turn up. Now can we please focus on my dad?
HHH: OK, fine. He got kicked in the head, and I know it probably hurt, but I’ve beaten him up worse than that, right?
Steph: (reluctantly) Welll…yes, but still…
HHH: Look, I know you’re worried, but just tru –
(HHH is interrupted by Hornswoggle entering the room)
HHH: (Excitedly) CRUISERWIGHT!
(HHH hurriedly Pedigrees Hornswoggle and then returns to his game of chess)
Steph: Hunter, I’m going to go check on my dad, I’ll be back, later, alright?
HHH: (concentrating on the chess board, he moves a pawn) Fine, have fun.
Steph: (glaring) Fun? You think this will be fun?
HHH: OK, I’m sorry. Figure of speech.
(HHH looks back at the board to see he is now in checkmate)
HHH: Damn it! You cheated! (pointing at Sledgie) Steph, he cheated!
Steph: No he didn’t, it was a legal move.
(Sledgie as always says nothing, but leans to one side)
HHH: Fine! I might as well come with you since he’s just gong to cheat at chess.
(the two leave the room as the scene ends)
(Scene changes to Kendrick and Ezekial Jackson by what appears to be a giant plastic bubble, with Jackson having one foot inside)
Jackson: I feel like a complete idiot. What I am supposed to do with a plastic bubble?
Kendrick: Hey hey, that’s THE plastic bubble, I’ll have you know.
Jackson: Fine, THE plastic bubble. But what am I gonna do with it?
Kendrick: (shrugging) run around?
Jackson: But I can’t fit in it. You have any other ideas?
Kendrick: How are you at backflips?
Jackson: (staring) What do you think?
Kendrick: (sighing) This is going to be difficult.
(Orton and Edge enter the area)
Kendrick: Hey guys, how’s it going?
Edge: Dude, you’ve gotta hear this.
Kendrick: What?
(Edge wanders over and holds the Hardy mask in front of Kendrick’s face)
Edge: Hey Randy, look!
Orton: (looking up) HARDYYYYYYYYYYY! (he runs over and throws Kendrick to the ground, kicking him in the head, then jumps back looking mortified) Damn it, not again!
Edge: (grinning and looking at Jackson) Cool isn’t it?
Jackson: I guess. Does this mean I don’t have to get in the plastic bubble?
Edge: Um, yes?
Jackson: Good. (he begins to pull his leg out, then shrugs, climbs in all the way, and rolls off)
(scene changes to Steph and Trips standing in a makeshift infirmary with Vince in a hospital bed)
Steph: Dad? Daddy? Can you hear me?
Vince: Of course I can.
Steph: (Exhaling loudly) Good, I was worried. How are you feeling?
Vince: I’m fine, why?
Steph: Well, you did get kicked in the head.
Vince: I did?
Steph: Well…yes. Orton kicked you, don’t you remember that?
Vince: (puzzled) I don’t understand, why would Bob Orton kick me I the head instead of hitting me with a cast?
Steph: No, no, not Bob, it was Randy.
Vince: (looking more confused and furrowing his brow) Randy? Randy who? You’re not making sense.
Steph: Randy is Bob’s son, you know that.
Vince: That’s ridiculous, stop pulling my leg. Now where’s Patterson?
(Patterson pops his head in the room)
Patterson: Right here, boss.
Vince: Good, good. Now Pat, listen, we’ve got work to do, and just because I’m in a hospital bed. Besides, I know you’ve got that Rumble something or other idea you want to try, so we need to hammer out the details.(to Steph) Honey, would you and Mr Valentine please excuse us while we discuss business?
HHH: What? Mr. Valentine?
Vince: Look, Hammer, I know you’ve been with us a long time, but this is business, so could you excuse us for a moment?
HHH: My name is Triple H, not Greg Valentine.
Vince: (stares for a moment then starts laughing) That’s a good one, Hammer, but seriously. We need a moment to figure out how we can bring this new concept off right.
HHH: New concept? But it’s been around for over twenty years!
Vince: WHAT? Are you accusing me of stealing ideas?
HHH: Well, no, but –
Vince: GET OUT!
(Steph and Trips depart, with Steph looking more worried than ever and Trips giggling)
HHH: (once the door is closed) I think somebody punched his reset button.
Steph: (glaring) Will you stop?
(the ghost of Gorilla Monsoon enters and points at Steph)
Gorilla: That’s gimmick infringement, young lady, and if it doesn’t cease, I will punch your friend there right in the occipital protuberance!
(Monsoon departs as the scene ends)
helped $lim jinx NXT. Woops
