Stotty
Unicron
This is what happens when you don't give Taker the hot tag
Posts: 2,932
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Post by Stotty on Feb 7, 2010 23:07:38 GMT -5
So, I used to work with this girl, we've hooked up a few times before, but both agreed that being in a relationship while working together isn't a good idea.
I've since quit my job there, but i'm still really good friends with the people I work with. On the weekend we were out celebrating a birthday, I went outside to help her get a cab home. One thing lead to another and we ended up kissing.
Here's the problem, I don't really want to start a relationship with her. She's a great girl and I like her a lot, but I just feel a connection the way I should.
So, I have to call her in about an hour to let her down gently. Thoughts or suggestions on the best way to do it would be greatly appreciated. For some strange reason, I trust the folk here on the wrestlecrap forums to give me good advice.
(P.S. I'm a jerk for kissing her, because I knew it wouldn't lead anywhere, but I got caught up in the moment)
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Jay Peas 42
El Dandy
Totally flips out ALL the time.
Is looking forward to a Nation of Domination Kwannza Special.
Posts: 8,329
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Post by Jay Peas 42 on Feb 7, 2010 23:13:26 GMT -5
Wow, a board for someone who's problem is too many girls, that's a first.
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Post by Time Lord Soundwave on Feb 7, 2010 23:13:39 GMT -5
"Dear Baby, welcome to Dumpsville. Population: You!" If that doesn't work, three simple words: "I am gay!" But seriously, I have no idea.
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Post by 01010010 01101001 01100011 on Feb 7, 2010 23:15:59 GMT -5
Be honest and tell her you're not interested in a relationship right now. Anything lies will only make it worse.
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Soultastic
El Dandy
Only an idiot can be completely happy.
Posts: 8,027
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Post by Soultastic on Feb 7, 2010 23:20:02 GMT -5
As generic as it may sound, the only thing you can do is calmly talk to her and explain how you feel. If she really cares about you, she will be hurt no matter what you do. She needs to hear it from you face to face in a friendly way.
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Post by Clarence "Showstealer" Mason on Feb 7, 2010 23:26:01 GMT -5
As generic as it may sound, the only thing you can do is calmly talk to her and explain how you feel. If she really cares about you, she will be hurt no matter what you do. She needs to hear it from you face to face in a friendly way. Agreed. It has to come face to face. I think you understand from the reaction of your post and the acknowledgement that you're pretty much screwed either way. Being open and honest face to face is probably the least of the evils in the long run
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Stotty
Unicron
This is what happens when you don't give Taker the hot tag
Posts: 2,932
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Post by Stotty on Feb 7, 2010 23:30:11 GMT -5
As generic as it may sound, the only thing you can do is calmly talk to her and explain how you feel. If she really cares about you, she will be hurt no matter what you do. She needs to hear it from you face to face in a friendly way. Agreed. It has to come face to face. I think you understand from the reaction of your post and the acknowledgement that you're pretty much screwed either way. Face to face isn't really an option, we'll both be stuck at work all week, which means it would have to wait until the weekend. I can't really do that, I'd rather get it out of the way, even if it's a phone call. Being open and honest face to face is probably the least of the evils in the long run
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Post by Jason on Feb 7, 2010 23:49:00 GMT -5
Tell her you're into men. Works every time. And if you want her back down the road, tell her you changed your mind.
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Big L
Grimlock
Posts: 13,883
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Post by Big L on Feb 7, 2010 23:53:57 GMT -5
As generic as it may sound, the only thing you can do is calmly talk to her and explain how you feel. If she really cares about you, she will be hurt no matter what you do. She needs to hear it from you face to face in a friendly way. Agreed. It has to come face to face. I think you understand from the reaction of your post and the acknowledgement that you're pretty much screwed either way. Being open and honest face to face is probably the least of the evils in the long run Yea I agree with both responses
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Magician under the moonlight
Bill S. Preston, Esq.
Always Beaten To The Punchline. Always.
A magician and a thief. That's Badass
Posts: 15,727
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Post by Magician under the moonlight on Feb 7, 2010 23:57:14 GMT -5
"Dear Baby, welcome to Dumpsville. Population: You!" If that doesn't work, three simple words: "I am gay!" But seriously, I have no idea. Rather say "Look! I'm not gay but I'll learn" But Seriously, just tell her that the past few weeks have been great and I know I have felt some tension between us but I am not ready for a relationship but I still want to e your friend." Well not in those exact words but you get what I mean.
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Post by Clarence "Showstealer" Mason on Feb 8, 2010 0:18:26 GMT -5
Agreed. It has to come face to face. I think you understand from the reaction of your post and the acknowledgement that you're pretty much screwed either way. Face to face isn't really an option, we'll both be stuck at work all week, which means it would have to wait until the weekend. I can't really do that, I'd rather get it out of the way, even if it's a phone call. Being open and honest face to face is probably the least of the evils in the long run In that case I would do one of two things. 1. Kiss my friendship with this girl goodbye 2. Pray to god I'm wrong.
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Post by Non Banjoble Tokens on Feb 8, 2010 0:19:05 GMT -5
Tell her you're into men. Works every time. And if you want her back down the road, tell her you changed your mind. That or you could tell her you're into men who look like women. We could always use a few more of you.
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Post by casualobserver on Feb 8, 2010 0:23:37 GMT -5
Just say those three magic words: "I am gay."
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Franchise
Hank Scorpio
No you didn't.
Ronnie Garvin, you idiot! I like steak, not soup, Ronnie Garvin!
Posts: 6,879
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Post by Franchise on Feb 8, 2010 0:26:20 GMT -5
I don't think I'm seeing what the issue is. You've messed around a few times, but aren't dating, correct? (I hope you see what I mean here.) If that's the case, who says you have to "let her down" at all? You mentioned that you discussed the possibility of a relationship before, and you were both cool with not going any further with it. So...don't.
Here's an example of what I mean...there's this girl I've been seeing for about a month now. She doesn't consider me her boyfriend, nor do I consider her my girlfriend. We just hook up, do *ahem* certain activities, and that's pretty much that. Just having some fun, no strings.
From what I can tell, this girl might be of the same mindframe. That kiss outside her workplace doesn't necessarily mean she wants you to be her boyfriend, and if not, and if you're interested in such a "relationship", keep having fun with her! I mean that in not only a sexual way, but in a friendship way as well.
Maybe I'm misunderstanding something, but that's my .02.
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Stotty
Unicron
This is what happens when you don't give Taker the hot tag
Posts: 2,932
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Post by Stotty on Feb 8, 2010 0:41:52 GMT -5
I don't think I'm seeing what the issue is. You've messed around a few times, but aren't dating, correct? (I hope you see what I mean here.) If that's the case, who says you have to "let her down" at all? You mentioned that you discussed the possibility of a relationship before, and you were both cool with not going any further with it. So...don't. Here's an example of what I mean...there's this girl I've been seeing for about a month now. She doesn't consider me her boyfriend, nor do I consider her my girlfriend. We just hook up, do *ahem* certain activities, and that's pretty much that. Just having some fun, no strings. From what I can tell, this girl might be of the same mindframe. That kiss outside her workplace doesn't necessarily mean she wants you to be her boyfriend, and if not, and if you're interested in such a "relationship", keep having fun with her! I mean that in not only a sexual way, but in a friendship way as well. Maybe I'm misunderstanding something, but that's my .02. I probably didn't make it clear that I know she does want a relationship with me. I didn't know it when we kissed on the weekend, I thought we were both past that. But, having spoken to some of my friends, i know that she never really got over me. Which just makes things harder. It doesn't matter though, because I just called her and told her. Like you guys said, I just came straight out and told her. She took it pretty well, she said it was fine. I apologised and told her I shouldn't have let the situation happen if it wasn't going anywhere. She seemed ok, but I think she's probably dissapointed. After all, I am a catch (and cute as a button, *jokes*). I'm sure i'll hear the truth eventually, secrets don't stay secrets for very long with my friends. So, i guess i'll update you if the need arises. Thanks for all your advice.
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AFN: Judge Shred
Bill S. Preston, Esq.
Wanted to change his doohicky.
Member of The Bluetista Buyers Club
Posts: 18,221
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Post by AFN: Judge Shred on Feb 8, 2010 0:43:16 GMT -5
"Hey baby, you are what I call plan B"
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Post by Jason on Feb 8, 2010 0:45:05 GMT -5
Tell her you're into men. Works every time. And if you want her back down the road, tell her you changed your mind. That or you could tell her you're into men who look like women. We could always use a few more of you. Or that your into girls with shlongs, so you'll hope for the best!
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Post by Munkie91087 on Feb 8, 2010 2:30:00 GMT -5
You should just man up and get married.
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Welfare Willis
Crow T. Robot
Pornomancer 555-BONE FDIC Bonsured
Game Center CX Kacho on!
Posts: 44,259
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Post by Welfare Willis on Feb 8, 2010 11:14:14 GMT -5
Baby, I used to love you, but that's when you weren't such a fattie. Our love can never be until you learn exercise is more then lifting a fork to your mouth.
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Blindkarevik
Grimlock
Rock... Paper... Straight-edge!
I Like To <blank>
Posts: 14,343
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Post by Blindkarevik on Feb 8, 2010 12:02:34 GMT -5
You could do the honorable thing and have a friend call her and tell her you died in a horrible accident.
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