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Post by noleafclover1980 on Nov 9, 2010 2:39:52 GMT -5
... a lightbulb?
A:It's an obscure number, you probably haven't heard of it.
Anyone else got some good jokes?
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Post by Orange on Nov 9, 2010 2:42:05 GMT -5
I laughed, hard. Bravo!! But sadly I don't have any jokes to share
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Bam Neeley
Dennis Stamp
Foxy Stoat Seeks Pig!
Posts: 4,047
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Post by Bam Neeley on Nov 9, 2010 2:43:49 GMT -5
A physicist, a biologist and a mathematician sit in a sidewalk cafe, looking at the building across the road. Two people go into the building, then three people come out.
Physicist: "This must be a measuring error!" Biologist: "This is proof of procreation!" Mathematician: "If one more person goes into the building, it will be empty!"
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Post by Dave the Dave on Nov 9, 2010 7:30:16 GMT -5
How many member of a ska band does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: One to screw it in, one to drop it, and the rest can pick it up, pick it up, pick it up.
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lucas_lee
Hank Scorpio
Heel turn is finished, now stripping away my personality
Posts: 6,734
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Post by lucas_lee on Nov 9, 2010 7:52:57 GMT -5
How many virgins does it take to screw in a lightbulb
A: None because they haven't screwed anything in their life
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Post by Ultimo Chocula on Nov 9, 2010 8:37:08 GMT -5
What's the difference between a guitar player and a mutual fund?
The mutual fund will eventually mature and start earning money.
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Soultastic
El Dandy
Only an idiot can be completely happy.
Posts: 7,857
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Post by Soultastic on Nov 9, 2010 9:28:15 GMT -5
What do Jerry Lawler and Santino have in common?
They are always "kidding".
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wrasslinmachine
Don Corleone
Savagely protecting the innocent since 1987.
Posts: 1,971
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Post by wrasslinmachine on Nov 9, 2010 10:10:59 GMT -5
Q: How many Necrophiliacs does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: None. Necrophiliacs prefer dead bulbs.
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Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
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Post by Deleted on Nov 9, 2010 10:14:42 GMT -5
I thought you were going to do this one:
"How many hipsters does it take to screw in a light bulb?" Answer: "Come on man - no one uses light bulbs anymore..."
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Thrillho
Dennis Stamp
0 Days since last "incident"james.anderson1989jamesandersonmusicJimBillAnderson
Posts: 3,740
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Post by Thrillho on Nov 9, 2010 10:24:02 GMT -5
How many contortionists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
Two. But you have to wonder how they got in there.
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Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
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Post by Deleted on Nov 9, 2010 10:32:00 GMT -5
How many sorority members does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Two. One to screw it in and one to make a t-shirt about it.
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Fiddleford H. McGucket
El Dandy
My Mind's been gone for 30-odd years! Can't Break what's already broken!
Posts: 8,748
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Post by Fiddleford H. McGucket on Nov 9, 2010 11:10:07 GMT -5
Q: How many Psychologists does it take to Change a lightbulb?
A: 1, but it has to WANT to change
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Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
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Post by Deleted on Nov 9, 2010 11:13:15 GMT -5
Is the glass half empty or half full?
The engineer would say that the glass is twice as big as needs to be and would immediately begin working on plans for a new, more efficent cup.
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Post by Baixo Astral on Nov 9, 2010 12:01:12 GMT -5
A Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. The barman says, "What is this, some sort of joke?"
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Thrillho
Dennis Stamp
0 Days since last "incident"james.anderson1989jamesandersonmusicJimBillAnderson
Posts: 3,740
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Post by Thrillho on Nov 9, 2010 12:04:58 GMT -5
I was watching the news yesterday lunchtime and one story started "Three Archbishops have walked away from the Church of England today".
I've left News 24 on for the last day and a half waiting for the punchline.
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Mozenrath
FANatic
Foppery and Whim
Speedy Speed Boy
Posts: 121,122
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Post by Mozenrath on Nov 9, 2010 12:24:08 GMT -5
Two peanuts were walking down the street. One was adopted.
The sad patient tells the doctor, "But doctor, I am Paul Giamatti!"
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Post by Hulkshi Tanahashi on Nov 9, 2010 12:37:40 GMT -5
How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb?
None, because they'll all just tell you to just flip the switch.
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Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
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Post by Deleted on Nov 9, 2010 12:52:56 GMT -5
How many members of Slipknot does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Four - one to screw in the bulb and three to play drums.
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Post by willywonka666 on Nov 9, 2010 14:51:20 GMT -5
What's the difference between a guitar player and a mutual fund? The mutual fund will eventually mature and start earning money. HAHAHAHA!
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Post by DrewVonAwesome on Nov 9, 2010 14:55:11 GMT -5
I'm going to steal my favorite from Sean Carless...
How many Vietnam veterans does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
OF COURSE YOU DON'T KNOW YOU WEREN'T THERE!
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