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Post by Wolf Hawkfield no1 NZ poster on Apr 29, 2013 7:26:13 GMT -5
Yes is this one of another one of those threads where I bitch about how of my one friends is a idiot like the one I did a couple of weeks ago so all of you groaning oh not this shit again.... I apologize in advance.
To get straight to the point I have a lady friend who I'll call Rachael and she is sorta clueless when to comes to men and not to mention can be a large sympathy whore at times. Her last relationship (if you can call it that) unsurprisingly went tits up and she spent the past couple of weeks roaming facebook looking for sympathy and reassurance that it wasn't her fault yadda yadda yadda. However last Saturday one my missus's best friends (who is a mutual friend of Rachael had party because she along with my missus and some other friends are going on 2 month trip of Europe. However Rachael was pissed off that she wasn't invited and after a few drinks, had a meltdown which resulted in her storming off and since I was on my way to pick the missus up, I was one who who had to go look for her at 3am in the bloody morning.
So I found her and to calm the women down I shouted her some pancakes at Dennys but she kept on crying on about stuff so I took her to the car and told her to stop as she was making a twat of herself. I was blunt with her because while I do like her and when she is not acting like this is a fun person to hang around with but I had to tell her the following....
- Time after time she dates same old losers and gets upset when all it turns to custard. - She treats the men who she dates like their pet projects rather than people - She has grossly unrealistic exceptions of men and never takes any responsibility for her failed relationships - Her friends were right not invite her as her behavior over the past few months has become problematic when she drinks. Not to mention she expects other to make her feel better about herself.
Now I'm sorta copped some flank for saying this to her but what the hell was I supposed to say to her. I mean I wasn't trying to be nasty or anything but there is no point beating around the bush because until she figures it out this is just going to happen again and again.
Now I told her that while her friends will be there for her she needs to solve her own problems.
So did I do the right thing by being blunt with her or not?
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King Ghidorah
El Dandy
On Probation for Charges of two counts of Saxual Music.
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Post by King Ghidorah on Apr 29, 2013 7:32:47 GMT -5
*Groan* Oh Not this shit again
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Post by Bone Daddy on Apr 29, 2013 7:39:21 GMT -5
I have to say, your UK vocab does make this seem somewhat more charming
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Post by Non Banjoble Tokens on Apr 29, 2013 7:53:27 GMT -5
So this friend of yours is single now?
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Post by Can you afford to pay me, Gah on Apr 29, 2013 8:27:19 GMT -5
That's a hard one too judge. While she may hate you now, there is a chance that she will come around and respect you later for it. The situation I can some what relate too. As there is a girl I've been best friends with who I've seen make the same kind of mistakes with who she dates. Now she doesn't try and do the things your friend does. She always very loving of them. But the kinds of men she goes after are unloyal and dishonest. Cheats on her and the tend seems once she gives it up to them. Is when they move on. Then leads to a bunch of drama and her heart gets broken.
I have tried to get with her in the pass knowing how I tried her would always been better then anybody else. She turned me away and friend zoned me. The things I've done for her and still do is things nobody else seems to do. When she need someone the most I was there. Yet over the weekend something changed because she been acting really weird to me as in the way she treating me in a bad way. Like all of sudden I became nothing to her. Like Tues we hang out and everything was normal. Thursday we where going to hang out at the club. She backs out for reason I understood. Said we can go Friday. Where again she backed out for the same reasons. I get with finals in school going on. She is stressed. But she gave me attitude Fri when all I said was "that sucks because I was looking forward to it but I understand." Next day we work together. She can talk to all the other co workers like normal. Joke around and stuff. Yet with me she blows me off every time I said anything to her.
When I asked her about it last night. All she tell me that "she not on the mood." I just said not in the mood to even act like I was even there at all. Because I asked her why and if I did something wrong. She said it nothing to do with me. Tells me she talk to me the next day yesterday. Which she didn't. I texted her and all I got was a one word response that didn't really make sense. I'm just don't understand it. I'm upset she treating me like I did something wrong and worried about her.
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Deleted
Deleted Member
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Post by Deleted on Apr 29, 2013 9:32:05 GMT -5
As I have learnt that hard way, some people can not be helped. She probably likes the attention she gets, when a guy dumps her.
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Snowman
Dennis Stamp
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Post by Snowman on Apr 29, 2013 12:11:00 GMT -5
I have to say, your UK vocab does make this seem somewhat more charming That's what confused me! He used very enlish words like "missus" and "twat" but then later says he bought her pancakes at a Denny's.
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Post by Wolf Hawkfield no1 NZ poster on Apr 29, 2013 16:58:55 GMT -5
I have to say, your UK vocab does make this seem somewhat more charming That's what confused me! He used very enlish words like "missus" and "twat" but then later says he bought her pancakes at a Denny's. Eh whats confusing we have Denny's in New Zealand.
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Glitch
King Koopa
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Watching you.
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Post by Glitch on Apr 29, 2013 17:20:23 GMT -5
That's what confused me! He used very enlish words like "missus" and "twat" but then later says he bought her pancakes at a Denny's. Eh whats confusing we have Denny's in New Zealand. "It's an American institution!"
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Post by Wolf Hawkfield no1 NZ poster on Apr 29, 2013 19:45:14 GMT -5
Can they really be an "American institution" when they have stores restaurants in Canada, Curaçao, Costa Rica, Honduras, Japan,Mexico, New Zealand, Qatar, and the United Arab Emirates. As I have learnt that hard way, some people can not be helped. She probably likes the attention she gets, when a guy dumps her. Not so sure as she went though a I could be a lesbian/Bisexual phase during her uni days.
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SEAN CARLESS
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Post by SEAN CARLESS on Apr 29, 2013 23:40:01 GMT -5
You did the right thing. We're here to learn from our mistakes and to stop repeating destructive and stubborn habits. It should be drilled into her until she changes or goes away altogether.
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Post by Wolf Hawkfield no1 NZ poster on May 1, 2013 22:43:24 GMT -5
That's a hard one too judge. While she may hate you now, there is a chance that she will come around and respect you later for it. The situation I can some what relate too. As there is a girl I've been best friends with who I've seen make the same kind of mistakes with who she dates. Now she doesn't try and do the things your friend does. She always very loving of them. But the kinds of men she goes after are unloyal and dishonest. Cheats on her and the tend seems once she gives it up to them. Is when they move on. Then leads to a bunch of drama and her heart gets broken. I've know a few of those but with mine If I'm willing to make a educated guess I think her problem is that deep down she is afraid of being lonely. I mean I got a text from her today and she thanked me for being honest with her. but I can't help but feel until she gets her shit together (emotionally that is) that this happen again and again.
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Post by Can you afford to pay me, Gah on May 2, 2013 7:02:32 GMT -5
That's a hard one too judge. While she may hate you now, there is a chance that she will come around and respect you later for it. The situation I can some what relate too. As there is a girl I've been best friends with who I've seen make the same kind of mistakes with who she dates. Now she doesn't try and do the things your friend does. She always very loving of them. But the kinds of men she goes after are unloyal and dishonest. Cheats on her and the tend seems once she gives it up to them. Is when they move on. Then leads to a bunch of drama and her heart gets broken. I've know a few of those but with mine If I'm willing to make a educated guess I think her problem is that deep down she is afraid of being lonely. I mean I got a text from her today and she thanked me for being honest with her. but I can't help but feel until she gets her shit together (emotionally that is) that this happen again and again. Well my situation just went a whole different way. As now she seemed to decide to kick me out of her life for no real reason. Ever sense a week ago Fri things got rocky and I tried so hard to work it out with her but all she wants to do is cruse me out and call me names when I try telling her how she making me feel with this attitude. It's like she just out of no where changed and forgotten everything I ever done for her and won't talk to me about it. So upsetting because I thought we where true to one another and I called her my best friend because she was. Now I feel like I lost her as that and as a friend period without doing a thing to her.
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Juice
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Post by Juice on May 2, 2013 7:13:05 GMT -5
*Groan* Oh Not this shit again lol coming from you? to the op. It's none of your business man. try to ignore it.
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Post by "Playboy" Don Douglas on May 2, 2013 9:24:47 GMT -5
I read that entire post in William Regal's voice.
On point, I can't say I blame you. Sometimes it just gets to a point that you have to say something.
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Post by Wolf Hawkfield no1 NZ poster on May 2, 2013 17:54:37 GMT -5
*Groan* Oh Not this shit again lol coming from you? to the op. It's none of your business man. try to ignore it. Mabye but like I said before I've told her whats up and I'm going to leave it at that as only she can solve her relationships problems no one else.
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Post by Kash Flagg on May 2, 2013 18:45:31 GMT -5
You have awful taste in friends.
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Tarik Dee
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Post by Tarik Dee on May 2, 2013 19:20:33 GMT -5
And what if you hook up both of your terrible friends? maybe they could be awful together.
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Post by Wolf Hawkfield no1 NZ poster on May 3, 2013 6:35:43 GMT -5
And what if you hook up both of your terrible friends? maybe they could be awful together. I think doing that would destroy this fragile planet.
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Tarik Dee
Hank Scorpio
I loved you before I even ever knew what love was like
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Post by Tarik Dee on May 3, 2013 12:01:33 GMT -5
And what if you hook up both of your terrible friends? maybe they could be awful together. I think doing that would destroy this fragile planet. Maybe, but it would be amusing.
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