Spoiled for length.
{Spoiler}
"Yo, I'm tellin you guys - I been tellin you all these days since forever y'all! It's Kaitlyn, who's really actually Bray Wyatt in disguise y'all!" He said as he pointed the finger at Stephanie McMahon and her husband, the COO.
"OH SHUT UP
SLATAH, YOU NINCOMPOOP. I'M AFRAID I'VE GOT SOME BAD NEWS. NOBODY LIKES YOU, SO SHUT-UP AND GO CRAWL BACK INTO YOUR CORNER."
One man stood up, with some GM swag.
"Guys, Guys! It's got to be
John Cena. It must be him. I mean, he's been the one leading the chaos last time right? Wouldn't it make sense that's he's doing it all over again? He's even dating Nikki Bella - Nikki Bella who we found out was guilty since the beginning. Danger is hiding in plain sight. Think about it! I'm the General Manager, Darn It! Why aren't you all listening to me! I'm in charge here!"
Suddenly the room dimmed and then...
Summer Rae and Fandango emerged from behind gold curtains and pink lighting, ballroom dancing to a chorus of Da-da-da-da-da-da-da and the confusion of others.
"I am
FAN-DANG-O... and sorry Stupid, Sexy,
Brad Maddox, it isn't Cena who is guilty, no-no-no."
Fandango waved his fingers, as he brushed his hair back with a hand and passed the microphone to his partner,
Summer Rae.
"Because I know exactly who is!"
Summer Rae shrieked out.
"It's you!" Summer pointed a finger forward straight forward to the Authority.
The crowd gasped.
"Oh, I though it was Bray Wyatt too,"
Fandango muttered as he cleared his throat. "Um, sorry
Summer, go on."
"THAT IS RIDICULOUS," Stephanie shouted out in a shrill voice of her own. "My husband and I would never do such a thing. We are the Authority! We only do what's best for business! We were the ones who even set up this investigation in the first place. If it wasn't for us,
The Total Divas and Tons of Funk would be running the WWE right now!"
Stephanie was livid, jumping up and down in anger.
"How dare you, how dare all of you for accusing me and my family, of such, blasphemy! Security! Please escort
Fandango and Ms. Summer Rae, out of the building! KANE, GET THEM KANE!"
Fire burst and Kane walked out from the entrance, only to get pounce on out of nowhere by a surprise KNEE PLUS, by a returning Daniel Bryan, who screamed out...
"I AM THE TAG TEAM CHAMPIONS... YES! YES! YES!"
As all of the security guards ran after him, leaving everyone alone.
"Nice try Stephanie - but we have proof."
John Cena, finally spoke out. "I over heard Nikki and her sister, talking about the deal the authority made with the total divas, about making the WWE all about the Total Divas if they could take everyone else out, as that would be 'best for business', Nikki even tried getting me involved, so I played along, but know that what I did, I did out of love and respect for the business. Hustle Loyaly Respect!" [/SRS CENA MODE]
Summer Rae agreed. "I am the newest Total Diva and they told me about the whole thing!"
"WHAT IS ALL THIS RUBBISH? DAY-CORUM PLEASE!" A confused Bad News Barrett said as he smashed his gavel down.
"They've been lying to you, Jack!" Cena said again in his serious voice.
Suddenly, the COO
Triple H himself spoke up.
"YEAH, THAT'S RIGHT, IT WAS ME THE WHOLE TIME, BUT YOU KNOW WHAT? THERE'S NOTHING ANY OF YOU CAN DO ABOUT IT, BECAUSE STEPHANIE AND I ARE THE SMARTEST, SEXIEST, MOST FUNNIEST, BADASS COUPLE IN THE WWE, AND GUESS WHAT' WE'RE THE OWNERS AND I AM THE CEREBRAL ASSASSIN, THE GAME AND I AM THAT DAMN GOOD.
1ST/2ND - I BURIED THE BELLA TWINS WITH MY SHOVEL AND SLEDGEHAMMER
3RD - WAS MARK HENRY UNDER HIS OWN CHOCOLATE BARS
4TH - KOFI KINGSTON FOR SNOOPING AROUND
5TH - DEAN AMBROSE BECAUSE OUR OWN SECURITY FORCE WAS BECOMING TOO SUSPICIOUS
6TH/7TH/8TH - I TOOK OUT BRODUS CLAY AND THE FUNKADACTYLS BECAUSE THEY NEEDED TO GO.
9TH - CURTIS AXEL BECAUSE, HEY IT WAS TOO EASY AND I NEEDED TO BURY SOMEONE
10TH - WAS AJ LEE, FOR BEING A THORN IN MY SIDE.
I WAS EVEN RESPONSIBLE FOR LEADING LYNCHES ON LOSERS LIKE SIN CARA, NATALYA AND ZEB COLTER AND YOU ALL FELL FOR IT. YOU WANNA KNOW WHY I DO IT? WHY I BURIED ALL THOSE PEOPLE? BECAUSE IT'S WHAT BEST FOR DIZ BIZNESS! THERE'S ONLY ONE PERSON I CAN TRUST TO BRING IN THE RATINGS AND THAT ONE GUY IS ME!
PLUS DAMN, IT'S JUST PLAIN FUN TO DO!
NOW, NOW I'M GOING TO BURY ALL OF YOU TOO - SO I CAN WRESTLE A BROOM! RATING WILL BE THROUGH THE ROOF WITH ME AS FACE OF THE WWE!"
Suddenly....
"Actually I'm the owner, which means, I'm in charge and quite frankly,
Stephanie and Triple H. I'll be taking my show back, starting immediately.
*Cheers erupted throughout the stadium arena*
"STEPHANIE.
TRIPLE H......
YOUUUUUUUURRRRRRR'EEEEE FIIIIRRRREEEEEEEED!"
"NOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Stephanie screamed as YES! YES! YES! filled the arena.
Suddenly Daniel Bryan ran back in, striking Stephanie McMahon in the face with a KNEE PLUS.
"YES! YES! YES!"
The WWE Superstars surrounded
HHH, when Bad News Barrett stepped down from the podium to stand in front of
HHH. Seemingly to protect him.
"Oh thank goodness Wade, thanks for standing up for me..."
Triple H said with a smug smile.
Bad News Barrett's thoughts:
"
TRIPLE H. I AM AFRAID I'VE GOT SOME... BAD NEWS! - IT IS
GAME OVAH!"
In one quick motion, Bad News Barrett's foot went up, smashing
HHH right in the grapefruits.
"HAHAHA! I'VE ALWAYS WANTED TO DO THAT!"
The remaining superstars, led by a ball room dancing,
Fandango and Summer Rae danced over the fallen Authority's corpses, to the sounds of "Da-da-da-da-da-da-da!"
"Oh man, I can't believe, that I,
Brad Maddox am a winner! I should have my own show! Oh wait a minute, I do have my own show, I'm the GM! Hell yeah, I'm such a sexy, bad ass!"
"See I told ya it was them! I'm a One Man Problem Solving Band, Babay!"
Heath Slater said as he air guitared on his own.
"Ha, 'Game Over' nice one. Spoiler:
Cena wins again."
John Cena said with a smile, waving his hand in front of his face.
When the dust settled, three pairs of feet stood by, in the darkness.
"Now, ain't that a story. They all thought we was behind this, boys. Hahahaha! Naw, but soon Abigail herself will say when. We'll start with the unstoppable, 'immortal' hero
John Cena."
DERP.The End?
Congratulations to our winners...