Sin
- Why the past couple of days have I centered the PPV name when typing this up? There's no reason to, I type it in Wordpad.
- And while I'm asking questions, why did WCW change all of their PPV names in the last year or so of their existence?
- Oh, so that ominous slow logo swirl and fade wasn't just for Greed. Didn't figure but still.
- Don't go showing the seven deadly sins, that makes me want to turn this off and watch FMA.
- I don't really get how Jarrett hitting someone with a guitar is Sloth.
- Or how Sid making a stupid face is gluttony.
Shane Helms vs. Chavo Guerrero- These guys stepped up huge in two months, went from curtain-jerking to being fourth.
- I'd kind of be more interested to see a debate on which of these two has had a better career. I think Helms.
- Honestly I kind of want to play one of the THQ WCW games. I have a couple of them, should dig one out later.
- Give it this, this one has a much more coherent story to it than their other match.
- This show's audio is really poor.
- Should you really be talking about how cruiserweight matches are usually high-flying when both of these guys are more technical?
- That's a really weak count.
- Ahem. Folded him up like a pair of pants? What?
- This is actually a pretty good change of pace compared to a lot of WCW cruiserweight matches. It's pretty well plotted-out and they manage to make the crowd pop for pretty tame spots because they actually mean something and had build to them.
- How'd the double turn happen anyway? Chavo seems to be the face here and the crowd's firmly on his side but two months later it was the other way around.
- Better move, Nightmare on Helms Street or Mizard of Oz?
- It seems weird that two months later they completely glossed over Chavo having won clean a couple of months prior. It'd have fit with what they were going for in that match of Helms needing a miracle. Though then again half of that match he was ignoring selling that too.
- Yeah, you have been asking the question of who the mystery man is. You've asked it like six times in a row.
- Ugh, wait, I know where this is going, I saw the WrestleCrap induction for this the other day.
- I bet whoever the mystery man is, he's a real warrior. Probably fights like a wild animal. Bringing certain doom. Might have a friend who's a hawk.
- Seriously, why is it so hard for WCW to get that on PPV, you don't have two interviews in a row unless they're relating to the same match?
Big Vito vs. Reno- The hell was Reno thinking with that hair?
- I wasn't expecting, "You f***ed up!" chants on a WCW show.
- It isn't giving me much to comment on but this is a pretty decent brawl honestly. Though really one-sided, Reno is just slaughtering him.
- Though that was a really awkward clothesline.
- DONNYBROOK.
- Yeah, as it gets more competitive this is a lot of fun honestly. Kind of needs to wrap up soon though.
- And the move everyone now calls Cross Rhodes ends it right after I say that. Neato.
- I don't know that I'd describe winning the match as coming up craps.
- Kronik Protection Agency.
The Jung Dragons vs. Jamie Knoble & Evan Karagias- Then why did they come to the show?
- Screw it, I'm spelling it Noble.
- Uh, yeah, duh, of course he wasn't the leader of Three Count after he left the group.
- World's More Karagias Slam?
- I'm liking how this match just isn't letting up at all so far on the speed. Yeah, it's the opposite of what I praised the opener for but spotfests are fun too, and this one still has some grounding and consistency to it.
- Are the Dragons the heels here? It's weird they're the ones getting the Ricky Morton treatment here.
- Good show of the less experienced tag team thing with Noble and Karagias in Noble dropping getting the tag he was going for and paying for it. Nice touch.
- Damn, that's a suplex.
- That was a pretty unnecessary use of the word "literal". Not incorrectly used, just completely unneeded.
- This match has just stopped pretending to at all involve pins and stuff. I'm okay with that.
- Christ, yeah, that Tombstone does look like it broke his neck.
- Oh, no, the Dragons are the faces here quite clearly judging by the post-match stuff. I take back my earlier comment then.
- This show had better not have as many Buff Bagwell backstage segments as Greed did.
The Cat vs. Mike Sanders- I'm guessing this is where the good match streak ends.
- Scott Hudson is really, really annoying. Still better than JBL and King.
- I imagine given where they recapped a match between them at Halloween Havoc this feud felt like it was never going to end back in the day.
- What does that Cheeze-Whiz thing even mean?
- The playing to the crowd stuff was done pretty well honestly. It's conventional, but it certainly works and it's something you'd think you'd seen in WWE, y'know, at least every once in awhile.
- So, if Sanders is a coward who isn't interested in a fair fight with Cat and has twice already taken the upper hand by playing dirty. . . Why is this match a standard one-on-one one? He's the commissioner, he can prevent that.
- When the Russia thing runs its course, Rusev should take up the Cat's gimmick just to keep the shoeless bit.
- So why is Sanders wrestling with a shirt on? He looks to be in pretty decent shape.
- Is this match no DQ? First the referee did nothing to stop Sanders from grabbing a chair, then was fine with Cat's manager attacking him to prevent that.
- Sanders wasn't looking, how does he know Kronik's attacking him instead of Miller?
- Oh, it was for the commissionership, I guess that's why Sanders wasn't able to stack the rules in his favor.
- Uh, Tony, duh, of course Miller's the one that paid them off.
- That was actually a pretty fun match too.
- Really, we're watching Flair watching a recap of the Totally Buff segment? Swerve, Goldberg, Flair's on their side, I've seen the PPV a couple of months later. And it's WCW post-nWo so nobody who says they've got your back ever, ever does.
- Jurassic Slapnut? I'm guessing that sounded more clever in your head.
Team Canada vs. The Filthy Animals- It's a Penalty Box Match, so here's where the good match streak ends.
- The referee starts a USA chant before the match. Totally impartial!
- The Team Canada bus looks like a dairy truck.
- Uh, no, Team Canada has the momentum given they're the ones who laid out the other team before the match.
- Well, Storm botched that promo badly.
- Was the modern style of WWE promos based on him? He has like the exact same cadence going on here.
- Seriously, they elabotely painted unique signs for them for the penalty boxes?
- And why is Duggan explaining the rules?
- Actually doing a pretty decent job of it so maybe for the better actually.
- Referees should be threatening the competitors? Sure, Scott.
- Rey has the stupid horns on tonight.
- The very start of the match, two of the Canadians get put in the penalty box. That seems completely backwards to how a match like this should be booked.
- How did that not hurt Rey? He full on took a straight power bomb there, a rather sloppy one at that.
- And Storm managed to regain control before either of them was able to tag back in. Again, do they not know who the heels are here?
- Team Canada is sent to a three-on-one position
again? What sense does that make?
- I don't know what that submission Konnan's doing is but it's kind of awesome. Not sure why he didn't leave it on though, there's no one there to save Skipper.
- And again Skipper regains control before he can tag out. This match is baffling.
- Is there going to be a point where it is three-on-two in this match, or always three-on-one? At least this time it's the faces.
- Why is Major Gunns with Team Canada anyway?
- And how can she be put in the penalty box? She's a manager who's freaking out over being sprayed with stuff by the other manager. She's done nothing wrong and hasn't even tried to get involved in the match.
- Okay, Tigress is too. Makes a little more sense but still really doesn't.
- Do I really have to point out how stupid it is to put Konnan in a chinlock while you have him three-on-one? The commentators are saying it for me.
- Handicap on the heels AGAIN?! At least this time it's two-on-one.
- And how is trying to cut Kidman's hair against the rules anyway?
- Shouldn't Mysterio go into the penalty box for calling Tigress in for that?
- The heels valiantly overcome the frequent odds, blatant interference, and biased referee to win clean.
- Well, Tenay's an asshole. Why was he being so smug, and why didn't Sanders immediately punch him out for it?
- Uh, you're no longer the commissioner, you should be more annoyed over this.
Terry Funk vs. Meng vs. Crowbar- Man, that list of competitors reads like the set-up to a joke.
- And why on earth is this getting a recap video? There doesn't even seem to be an actual storyline here besides, "These guys want the Hardcore title for some reason."
- So the face starts the match off attacking Daffney for no reason. She was just sitting there.
- God, this is stupid. And the commentators are nice enough to raise the same question I'm asking, where's Meng?
- Oh, there he is. Took his sweet ass time, huh?
- Funk takes his time about selling the fire extenguisher, huh?
- Did that weak burying him under a few tables thing really put Meng down that long? Really?
- That's really early in the match for a leg drop off a balcony through a table.
- "Crowbar just wiped out Crowbar." Genius commentary there, Scott.
- Hey, Meng, dumbass - pin Funk, don't pull Crowbar up.
- How can you clearly see that a superkick missed when seeing it from behind?
- What is that buzzing noise?
- Convenient there just so happened to be an extra set of railing there for absolutely no reason besides for Funk to use it as a weapon.
- And another PPV of Funk taking a big leg injury spot and just saying, "Nah, I don't feel like even pretending to sell that."
- How the hell are they not noticing Meng standing there? It's not even like he's ducking or staying out of the way, he's talking around.
- Wow, Meng actually did the smart thing on that splash. I wasn't expect that but I was about to comment on it.
- Actually at some point this started getting a good flow to it. First half is all sorts of dumb but it's kind of fun now in a spotfest way.
- That spot of them both just beating Meng senseless with chairs was pretty neat.
- Meng shrugged it off pretty quickly but screw it, it's Meng, he's allowed to. Though the story of the match seemed more suited to a Crowbar win.
- I wonder who Meng wound up dropping that title to anyway.
- Flair's still pretending he's not turning heel later.
- Ha ha, what the hell is Sid wearing? He looks like a gigantic eight year old.
The Insiders vs. The Natural Born Thrillers- I wonder who wins this given that tag title match at Greed. It's seriously screwing up how I usually try to avoid spoilers for these shows watching one from two months later.
- And seriously, they have a tag team name for DDP and Nash - albeit a stupid and lazy one - but they have separate entrances?
- Ah, to accomodate the Wolfpac theme. I'm okay with it then.
- Given Flair's the one cutting this off instead of Cat, why is this not happening before Sanders lost the commissioner spot?
- It's annoying hearing you over and over start sentences with, "It's..." while not actually saying anything.
- This match really isn't actually giving me anything to say, not helped by knowing where it's going.
- If the illegal man was making the pin, then why did the ref count it anyway and only run him off after the kickout?
- Man, Tombstones were really overused in WCW.
- Guessing they didn't actually get suspended over violating the interference ban.
- I'm guessing the odds are absolutely zero that DDP and Nash seek revenge on Luger and Buff for costing them the tag titles in their no DQ tag match later in the night.
- The motivation was to lead into that Steiner / DDP match, duh. But you're not supposed to know that yet.
- Well, he's right, in the long run the tag titles do wind up being more important than the commissioner spot. Which is pointless anyway given Flair seems to have all of the power anyway.
General Rection vs. Shane Douglas- This is a First Blood Chain Ladder match for the US title. A First Blood Chain Ladder match.
- Wow, you can't hear Douglas's introduction at all.
- Yeah, that music completely fits a general.
- Even if he does have a chain on him, so what? It's a ladder match, it's no DQ. And why does it have to be a chain, why not go grab a chair or something? Or, y'know, the f***ing ladder?
- Wait, what? It's a First Blood match that has to end in the ring? How the f*** do you enforce that rule?!
- Why is DeMott yelling, "Ask him!" while he has Douglas in an armbar?
- I'm pretty sure most people have had cuts on their arms and legs before.
- Really? A comment about trying to make sure it's hardway? Really?
- Actually, that raises a good point. Why doesn't anybody ever respond to a First Blood match by taking the Taipei Deathmatch approve?
- Is anyone going to even try for a ladder? They're just working each other's arms and legs. In a First Blood match. And there aren't even any ladders lying around.
- This is so much more boring than that stipulation would make you think. It's all just leg work.
- Why are you doing a figure four in a First Blood match?!
- And why have there been no weapons used? They're talking about it like you can't use anything but the chain.
- Oh, and they just said you can use the bell, just neither of them is. And there are chairs sitting right there, they're climbing on them instead of swinging them. What the hell am I watching?
- Douglas, stop scratching his face and grab one of the goddamn chairs you're standing right next to!
- Tony sounds like he's about to cry. I'm more setting a record for facepalms.
- Oh, so it's like Bret's turnbuckle figure four except lazy and contrived.
- Why are you doing a chinlock in a First Blood match?! And where are the goddamn ladders?!
- DeMott finally grabs a ladder and hits Franchise with it completely by accident. That sounds about right.
- A ref bump so that Douglas can pull out another chain? WHY?! IT'S NO F***ING DQ AND DEMOTT'S HOLDING A CHAIN TOO!
- Seriously the only f***ing thing the ladder match contributed to the match is it's the reason the ref bump happened. What. The Hell. At least this piece of shit is over.
- Why did Douglas hide his chain and grab the other one? What the hell is the point?!
- Why did they have to cut to Scott Steiner? I don't want to see anymore chains right now!
- No, General, you weren't robbed. It was a no DQ match, hitting you with a different weapon from the one hanging above the ring is not cheating.
Goldberg & Sarge vs. Totally Buff- Funny how the stipulation for this match accidentally wound up being adhered to.
- Given what happened to Buff and Luger a couple of months after this, it's really funny that these two are the ones that end Goldberg's WCW career.
- Why are Totally Buff getting separate entrances? Again, they have a team name but they can't come out together?
- Man, they're really, really wanting someone to care about Sarge.
- Is that one guy dressed as Steve from Blue's Clues?
- Okay, I love Buffer's voice but maaaaaan his introductions go on way too long.
- At least this'll be short, there's half an hour left and two matches to go. Though that in mind, why on earth are these entrances lasting so long?
- And now suddenly the Network is buffering like mad. I guess it really doesn't want to watch this match. Neither do I.
- Really, Buff is dominating Goldberg? Really? At least it doesn't last long.
- Why on earth would Goldberg ever tag Sarge in? Besides him having a broken arm, it's freaking Goldberg.
- Could Sarge look any more generic? Absolutely nothing about this guy is memorable. Not even the cast is particularly noticeable.
- This match sure takes advantage of that no-DQ stipulation, huh?
- Oh, a couple of chair shots, that completely makes it warranted then.
- I prefer Triple H's Plan C.
- Why did being blinded make Goldberg start limping?
- And on another chair shot they mention the First Blood match. SERIOUSLY WHY THE HELL DIDN'T. . . . Ugh, whatever, I'm done bitching about it.
- And for basically absolutely no reason Goldberg takes the pin while Sarge was off being useless somewhere.
- It's funny, nobody's buying it except it actually was his last WCW appearance. Ah, that buyout screwed up a lot of stuff.
- Under fifteen minutes left on this show and they haven't even done the video package for the main event yet. What is this, Survivor Series 2013? Please don't make me watch that incidentally.
- Shame, it totally is the last sight of him, Scott.
- Seriously, they're still dwelling on this? That main event is going to be legendarily short, isn't it?
Scott Steiner vs. Jeff Jarrett vs. Sid Vicious vs. The Mystery Man Whose Identity Couldn't Be Any More Anticlimactic- If you haven't seen the Mystery Man's outfit, look it up. It looks so damn goofy.
- Oh, lord, and we're getting the lengthy Buffer introductions? Is this match five minutes long?
- Fun fact, it doesn't make your title look very good to have the commentators be constantly saying, "Who cares about the title, GOLDBERG LOST!" during the entrances.
- Ha, no, Jarrett's not known for his stroke. Give it a year.
- Most of the length of this match will seemingly come from the return of the buffering.
- Oh, good thing Sid is wearing jean shorts and huge knee pads. Won't be quite as awful seeing his leg explode in a few since you can barely see them.
- So we're still pretending that Flair's not evil when he obviously set Goldberg up earlier?
- Given where this is going, what exactly is Jarrett and Steiner's plan when it comes to walking out to go find the Mystery Letdown? Just to confuse Sid?
- Seven and a half minutes left on the clock here, and that's with credits. I'm sure this match won't feel rushed at all.
- So, why is Jarrett working with Steiner anyway? Allies or not, why is he perfectly okay with him retaining the title?
- That was the worst Irish whip sell of all time. Sid just kind of awkwardly, half-heartedly jogged forward.
- Wait, and Steiner was going to let Jarrett get the pin? That makes even less sense!
- Well, Sid just came dangerously close to breaking Jarrett's neck.
- Man, Jarrett's hair was thinning badly at this point. Like, I'd assume he had to have gotten some sort of hair transplant, there is no way he wouldn't be balled right now otherwise the way he looks here.
- Why's the Mystery Man even masked, or needed at all for that matter? He, Steiner, and Jarrett all have a vested interest in keeping making sure Sid doesn't win and Steiner and Jarrett alone are getting the job done easily.
- Nice of Steiner to stall for the finish for absolutely no reason. At least he does it in-character.
- Least dignified use of Flair's theme ever.
- Guessing no credits since this show has under a minute left and the mat hasn't ended yet.
- MYGODTHATSANIMAL. Like anyone gives a shit about him without Hawk around.
- And they
still haven't figured out Flair's evil.
- "Road Warrior Animal?! Are you kidding me?!" There is no possible better line for that show to go out on.
Man, that first half is really good, but the show makes a
fast turn to being utter shit. I'd watch up through the Hardcore title match - including the Penalty Box one just because of how utterly baffling of a train wreck it is - but unless you want to be amazed at how incompetent the Douglas / Rection match is executed, I'd turn it off at that point.
All in all though, the show isn't really that hard a sit even despite the sudden change in quality halfway through it. Though that First Blood match... Holy crap am I going to have nightmares about that garbage.
Next up, we've got, let's see here... SummerSlam 2005. I've not seen it so works for me, have been wanting to see the selling in the main event beyond GIF form.
It bares mentioning, at the moment I'm considering on Sunday doing Night of Champions as it airs. Should I go ahead with that, or separately do some other, random show? Undecided on it so willing to hear some input. Don't really want to do both in one day since it really makes these shows feel longer when you're taking notes the whole time and can't really multitask that much.