How do I explain Goldberg as Universal Champion to my kids

[Deleted]

The title says all :-).

[Fuji's racist salt]

tell them old man goldberg cheated to win.

[Xxcjb01xX [PIECE OF: SH-]]

WWE Fastlane

You're gonna need to explain some things to your Kids

[The Thread Barbi]

This is why you respect your elders and betters, whippersnapper

[FAR5222]

Tell them he did it for the kids.

[Zombie Mod]

Goldberg asked one of his old wcw co-workers (who just so happened to also have an issue with the opponent.) to distract his opponent so he could sneak attack and win the title.

works better than "old man wanted to show off to his son, and wouldn't sign for large amounts of money unless he also got to walk around with the big shiny belt."

[Deleted]

Don't. Just blow up the house.

[Tenshigure]

Tell them he pinned the Universal Champion for a 3-count, which makes him the new Universal Champion. If you have to explain more than that, you're in for a hell of a ride when you get to 'The Talk'...

[slappy]

I think it'd be easier to have the Benoit talk.

[Deleted]

Tell them Goldberg wasn't always a nice person outside the ring.

[tigermaskxxxvii]

Just let them know that damn millennial Kevin Owens didn't want to reach for that brass ring.

[Reflecto]

Just tell them the truth.

"We had to live with our baby boomer parents thinking of themselves and caring more about toys from when they were kids than giving us the toys we want, and we learned from them that we are the center of the universe and so if we want something, we get it- and part of that involves us never putting away our toys and keeping them for ourselves so we can remain in a safe little bubble and not have to realize we grew up, our hopes and dreams ended when we had you, and our only value to the pop culture we love is to give birth to kids now who get to consume things and pay all the bills.

We don't want that, so we're going to never put away our toys and give them to your generation and demand they cater to our needs, not yours, and our needs are the people we loved when we were kids and it mattered so much. And that's why Goldberg, a guy who was over for about a year in 1998 when there was a boom period of money and we could have pretty much anything we wanted in life, so it felt like the most halcyon year of our lives, gets to have all glory given to him and steamroll everyone else. It sucks- but in 20 years you're going to turn out the same way as us and Kevin Owens will destroy some person your kids love instead in his place because you're going to be the same way.

There is no hope. This is the new normal of humanity.

Now come on, sport, let's go watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles or Transformers! You like them...and if you don't, I like them, and I pay the bills and you don't, so you WILL like them."