Post by Deleted on Jun 19, 2020 23:43:54 GMT -5
[*Disclaimer* I want it known that this isn't as serious of a situation as anything that has come out over these past few days. Just wanting to finally let someone know this happened but might not even be worth discussing in those terms.]
Okay...so...I've kept this to myself for 7 years, mostly because I don't really have anyone to divulge personal details like this to, but also because I don't really want to talk about this sort of thing, even with myself. I won't be telling a name, just making an occurance known. I haven't had the 'confidence' to do so before, but it just feels like I don't have any reason to protect myself from reliving certain situations anymore. Also because I never wanted to have my age known here or anywhere else for partly 'silly reasons' and also more serious. Please please do not take this as anything to bring anyone down, I just wanted to bring this issue more attention that I believe it deserves.
In 2013 when I was 17, I started counseling for the first time in my life at the insistence of my mother (yes, I have a solid relationship with my parents, just not enough to discuss something in this vein...which is also one reason I had to undergo counseling...my mother felt I wasn't close enough to her. No malicious intent on her part, just wanted to make sure if it was due to an underlying cause) ..no mental health therapy experience at all before then. I was a senior in high school and honestly wanted to drop out and was very close to doing so until starting therapy. I didn't suspect anything 'strange' with my counselor, in fact...I felt like they could really assist me with what I was going through. Around later that year, going into 2014, I decided to finally discuss my fear and lack of experience with intimacy of any kind, that was mostly due to prior trauma when I was much younger.
Well...it went kind of wrong and the opposite direction I thought it would/should. My counselor made what I believe to be a very dismissive and kind of a inappropriate remark in response to the effect of "Do you even know how to please a woman?" and pretty much dismissed my concerns with intimacy as a teen. I just didn't understand why they would reply in such a way. Again, I was 17 not in my 20s or above, so was really confused about this take. After all was said and over, I still haven't come to terms with my thoughts on intimacy.
I just want to know why they responded this way and if such a sentence was a 'normal' thing to say as a counselor. I always hear about how they have to be tough and are not there to be your friend but to challenge your mindset, buf I've never been sure if that was part of it and if I should accept that approach.
Again...not naming anyone or even accusing anyone of anything malicious. I'm relaying something that seems suspect, especially in retrospect.
Okay...so...I've kept this to myself for 7 years, mostly because I don't really have anyone to divulge personal details like this to, but also because I don't really want to talk about this sort of thing, even with myself. I won't be telling a name, just making an occurance known. I haven't had the 'confidence' to do so before, but it just feels like I don't have any reason to protect myself from reliving certain situations anymore. Also because I never wanted to have my age known here or anywhere else for partly 'silly reasons' and also more serious. Please please do not take this as anything to bring anyone down, I just wanted to bring this issue more attention that I believe it deserves.
In 2013 when I was 17, I started counseling for the first time in my life at the insistence of my mother (yes, I have a solid relationship with my parents, just not enough to discuss something in this vein...which is also one reason I had to undergo counseling...my mother felt I wasn't close enough to her. No malicious intent on her part, just wanted to make sure if it was due to an underlying cause) ..no mental health therapy experience at all before then. I was a senior in high school and honestly wanted to drop out and was very close to doing so until starting therapy. I didn't suspect anything 'strange' with my counselor, in fact...I felt like they could really assist me with what I was going through. Around later that year, going into 2014, I decided to finally discuss my fear and lack of experience with intimacy of any kind, that was mostly due to prior trauma when I was much younger.
Well...it went kind of wrong and the opposite direction I thought it would/should. My counselor made what I believe to be a very dismissive and kind of a inappropriate remark in response to the effect of "Do you even know how to please a woman?" and pretty much dismissed my concerns with intimacy as a teen. I just didn't understand why they would reply in such a way. Again, I was 17 not in my 20s or above, so was really confused about this take. After all was said and over, I still haven't come to terms with my thoughts on intimacy.
I just want to know why they responded this way and if such a sentence was a 'normal' thing to say as a counselor. I always hear about how they have to be tough and are not there to be your friend but to challenge your mindset, buf I've never been sure if that was part of it and if I should accept that approach.
Again...not naming anyone or even accusing anyone of anything malicious. I'm relaying something that seems suspect, especially in retrospect.
