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Post by Ryback on a Pole! on Oct 27, 2023 9:30:44 GMT -5
I watched it tonight. This was absolute shit.
How do you manage to take a relatively simple concept and a 1 - make it suck and 2 - make it so it drags on so long.
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Post by Finish Uncle Muffin’s Story on Oct 27, 2023 9:51:48 GMT -5
I caught it in theaters last night and it kind of stunk. I get why they put it on Peacock because everything, down to the opening credit sequence, felt more like a TV movie than something intended for the big screen.
Josh Hutcherson was fine, but the movie was nearly two hours long. I'm not sure that I needed some big dramatic backstory that set stakes and ties it all together. Just stick him and his sister in Freddy's for a night with some other expendable folks, have a few fun death sequences and call it a day.
There was none of that - it wasn't suspenseful in the slightest, there wasn't any real gore and it honestly feels like it could even be a little too long for the generation they're trying to target. It was a mess.
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Post by Ryback on a Pole! on Oct 27, 2023 10:37:10 GMT -5
Josh Hutcherson was fine, but the movie was nearly two hours long. I'm not sure that I needed some big dramatic backstory that set stakes and ties it all together. Just stick him and his sister in Freddy's for a night with some other expendable folks, have a few fun death sequences and call it a day. . That's what I was expecting it to be, and that's all it needed to be. It's Five Nights at Freddy's -- expectations are just for a fun movie with creepy animatronics killing people. Instead they added shitty subplot after shitty subplot. What purpose did that crap with the evil aunt serve? We didn't even see her get killed.
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Post by Finish Uncle Muffin’s Story on Oct 27, 2023 10:38:08 GMT -5
Josh Hutcherson was fine, but the movie was nearly two hours long. I'm not sure that I needed some big dramatic backstory that set stakes and ties it all together. Just stick him and his sister in Freddy's for a night with some other expendable folks, have a few fun death sequences and call it a day. . That's what I was expecting it to be, and that's all it needed to be. It's Five Nights at Freddy's -- expectations are just for a fun movie with creepy animatronics killing people. Instead they added shitty subplot after shitty subplot. What purpose did that crap with the evil aunt serve? We didn't even see her get killed. With how some of it was edited, I suspect there may be a cut of this thing that is even longer. It felt like a lot of stuff got dropped in the second half of the movie.
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Post by ace on Oct 27, 2023 15:28:03 GMT -5
It was done better in both Willy’s Wonderland and The Banana Splits Movie. Five Nights at Freddy’s has way more than double the budget and I genuinely don’t know where it went. Either Josh Hutcherson is a ten plus million dollar actor or they way overpaid for a script about a child custody battle and familial trauma.
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Ultimo Gallos
Grimlock
Dreams SUCK!Nightmares live FOREVER!
Posts: 14,400
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Post by Ultimo Gallos on Oct 27, 2023 16:11:40 GMT -5
Pre-sales tracking reported to be far better than any other horror film in the last year. That PG-13 rating should help them out at the box office. Grab the kids that can’t get into the R-rated fare during the spooky season. DO theaters really card for movies? And if so won't the kids just do what I did. Buy ticket to anotehr movie then just walk into the theater of the R rated movie. Thinking back it was rare we got carded.
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Post by Duke Cameron on Oct 27, 2023 17:40:06 GMT -5
Watched it on Peacock last night. I liked it. It wasn’t an amazing movie, but it was okay.
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Post by KingPooper on Oct 27, 2023 19:27:06 GMT -5
The brother was turned into balloon boy right?
What a boring mess of a movie.
Scott Cawthon likes the smell of his own farts.
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Post by TWERKIN' MAGGLE on Oct 27, 2023 21:06:48 GMT -5
Plot's eh, acting's fine, Matthew Lillard is wasted due to lack of screentime. The kills are atrociously tame and boring. Deadpool proved parents will take their kids to R-Rated movies if you throw enough color and IP at it, so why pretend like the PG-13 or bust thing is still valid?
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Celgress
Bill S. Preston, Esq.
The Superior One
Posts: 19,009
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Post by Celgress on Oct 27, 2023 22:25:50 GMT -5
3 out of 10, a big messy disappointment, IMHO.
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Post by bibboid on Oct 27, 2023 23:50:02 GMT -5
How did Mike manage to not go to jail because of the dead body in his living room?
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Post by Ryback on a Pole! on Oct 28, 2023 0:06:19 GMT -5
How did Mike manage to not go to jail because of the dead body in his living room? lol, good point. And since the aunt was clearly trying to take his sister away, he had motive that pins him as the number one suspect. And if he says "it wasn't me--it was the 40 year old animatronic bear possessed by a dead child", somehow I don't think that'd persuade the inspectors.
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Post by TWERKIN' MAGGLE on Oct 28, 2023 1:03:43 GMT -5
How did Mike manage to not go to jail because of the dead body in his living room? The only cop in miles got stabbed.
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Post by thechase on Oct 28, 2023 12:49:45 GMT -5
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Post by xCompackx on Oct 28, 2023 13:23:33 GMT -5
It's gonna be something fans are going to like more than critics. I dunno, I like it. Would I have paid to see it in theaters? No, but on Peacock, it's a decent watch.
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Celgress
Bill S. Preston, Esq.
The Superior One
Posts: 19,009
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Post by Celgress on Oct 28, 2023 22:51:33 GMT -5
Okay, IMHO, they shouldn't have added the two subplots (the second of which was basically stolen from Fox Mulder of X-Files fame lol) for the security guard's backstory that took up over half the movie. I'm baffled why they did so.
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Celgress
Bill S. Preston, Esq.
The Superior One
Posts: 19,009
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Post by Celgress on Oct 28, 2023 22:52:57 GMT -5
How did Mike manage to not go to jail because of the dead body in his living room? Hey, this is horror movie logic it doesn't need to make sense.
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Brood Lone Wolf Funker
Ozymandius
Got fined anyway. Possibly a Moose
James Franco is the white Donald Glover
Posts: 61,969
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Post by Brood Lone Wolf Funker on Oct 29, 2023 10:10:11 GMT -5
Third worst horror movie I've seen all year not including Tubi originals 1. Winnie The Pooh: Blood and Honey 2. The Haunting of the Queen Mary 3. Five Nights At Freddy's
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Post by ace on Oct 29, 2023 10:12:53 GMT -5
Third worst horror movie I've seen all year not including Tubi originals 1. Winnie The Pooh: Blood and Honey 2. The Haunting of the Queen Mary 3. Five Nights At Freddy's I didn’t see #2 but I would watch Blood and Honey a thousand times before I watched this again once. Cheap, bad and stupid is a lot more watchable than boring.
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mystermystery
Dennis Stamp
Still in the White Hummer
Posts: 4,373
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Post by mystermystery on Oct 29, 2023 10:27:59 GMT -5
Third worst horror movie I've seen all year not including Tubi originals 1. Winnie The Pooh: Blood and Honey 2. The Haunting of the Queen Mary 3. Five Nights At Freddy's This post just made me want to go watch more Tubi Originals. What an amazing concept. It doesn't work that way but they all feel like the cheap free streaming service giving some director $17 and saying "We need it by next Tuesday." The one with Michael Jai White stuck on a plane watching security footage while his daughter is running away from a killer in his home is such a daggone thing. I mean, they also let Rob Zombie's brother make a horror film. Also, 100% Winnie The Pooh: Blood and Honey is absolute garbage. Full blown nonsense garbage that even a rip-off of the end of Halloween Kills with WTP couldn't save. So bad. So very bad. Apparently, I have to check out The Haunting of the Queen Mary because bad movies are just...interesting in some ways. Five Nights at Freddy's wasn't that bad in my eyes. I felt the length at time, had no clue what most of the lore is, but was fine with Josh Hutcherson's trauma story and the incredibly obvious data dump cop. Plus, the animatronics were so impressive. I'll never watch it again, but I didn't regret the experience...and probably would watch a sequel? {Spoiler}And I don't know why I thought these things were tied to the business but that thing showing up in the house actually made my stupid self flinch like the idiot I must be.
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