Post by angryfan on Aug 19, 2007 6:00:36 GMT -5
Been a long time for one of these, so with some help from my buddy (and fellow poster) Midcardmaniac, here's the latest. Sorry for the long delay between them, but hopefully this one lives up to it.
(Scene opens with the gang, plus much of the roster, loaded on the bus entering Orlando)
HHH: I hate tourist traps, why the hell are we here?
Steph: Oh be quiet, you know I always like to go check out the Mania locations in advance. Besides, summer’s almost over, and we could all use a little vacation. Everyone else is excited, why aren’t you?
HHH: Because, every time we go on one of these, I never get to have any damn fun, that’s why. It’s always meetings this and meetings that. You always tell me there will be time for skee-ball, but no, I never get to play.
(Lemmy and the gang, packed into a bunk, perk up)
Lemmy: IT’S ALL ABOUT THAT GAME, AND IF YOU CAN –
HHH: Shut up, Lemmy!
Lemmy: Ok, ok, sorry. I just thought we were on.
HHH: Well, you’re not, go back to sleep.
Lemmy: Can do. (he immediately falls asleep)
Steph: Listen, Hunter, if it will help you relax, I promise you, there will be time to have fun, alright?
HHH: Fine, but I’m holding you to it.
Steph: That’s fine, now can you just relax and enjoy the ride like everyone else is?
HHH: (glancing at Sledgie, who is sporting a Hawaiian shirt and has flip flops tied tohim) What’re you staring at?
(Sledgie, as always, says nothing)
HHH: Like hell! No way you’re winding up winning more games than me. I’m sick of you upstaging me, getting promotions. It’s my ti –
Jim Johnstone – IT’S MY TIME! IT’S MY TIME!
(HHH grabs Slegie and hits Johnstone in the head, knocking him unconscious)
HHH: SHUT UP!
(scene changes to a small room near the rear of the bus, with Cena and Kahli relaxing. A small sign on the door reads “Champions’ Clubhouse”)
Cena: See, this is the life, isn’t it? We get our own little space, talk about the pressures of being champ, isn’t it cool?
Kahli: Well, I have to say, it is quite an interesting idea, and I do find that –
Gerwitz – (over the intercom) Ahem, caramels?
Kahli: How the hell did you know?
Gerwitz: It’s like GPS, tracks the presence of candy being chewed in your area. Cost us a fortune.
Kahli: We’re on vacation!
Gerwitz: You’re still getting paid, right?
Kahli: Fine! (replaces caramels in his mouth) BLAAARGRAWARMRABRARG?
Gerwitz: Yes, I am happy, but is that kind of language really necessary?
Kahli: BLAAAAAARGRAAAAAAAAR! (grabs the intercom with both hands and squeezes, shattering it)
Cena: Damn, dude, remind me never to mention candy around you.
Kahli: Blarg.
Cena: OK, that’s cool.
(John Morrison burst in, obviously intoxicated and possibly on hallucinogens)
Cena: Hey there Johnny Thunder, how’s it going?
Morrison: It’s Nitro, and that’s not even my name anymore, man. Can we open a window, let some of these bats out?
Cena: Bats?
Morrison: Man, they’re everywhere. Say, anybody else got the urge to get naked and, you know, run around?
Kahli: Blargrawr.
Morrison: What do you mean it’s just me?
Cena: Man, what the hell are you on, anyway?
Morrison: Look, Ac e told me I’m supposed to get more into the character, right? Well, all I know is that he sang, drank, and did a bunch of acid, so, I’m figuring I’ll start there and figure the rest out as I go.
Cena: Hey, can I try something?
Morrison: I guess so, why?
(Cena begins waving his hand in front of his face furiously)
Cena: You can’t see me! You can’t see me! Dude, can you see me?
Morrison: Yeah, why?
Cena: Damn it! She promised me the invisibility spell would work this time!
Morrison: Well, when you started waving, your hand started spinning, does that count?
Cena: Spinning?
Morrison: Yeah.
Cena: That’s awesome!
(Lashley bursts in the door, tailed by Arn and Finlay)
Lashley: Hey guys!
Cena: What the hell?
Kahli: Blargrawr?
Morrison: Run, it’s a talking goldfish! (he dives into a nearby cabinet)
(Cena stares at Morrison momentarily, then looks back at Lashley)
Cena: What’d you need, man?
Lashley: I came to hang out, since I’m an uncrowned champion.
Lashley: BUT I’M AN UNCROWNED CHAMPION!
Cena: But this room is for crowned champions, sorry man, it’s the rule.
(Lashley looks to Kahli for help)
Kahli: Grawfrawr. (he shrugs)
Lashley: (looking at Arn and Finaly) But you guys said –
Arn: Bobby, we said we’d ask, we didn’t say it was definite.
Lashley: But –
Arn: Come on, let’s go watch TV.
Lashley: (glaring at Cena and Kahi as he leaves) Bathurds. (he slams the door)
(Scene changes to the parking lot of Universal Studios. The bus parks, and everyone exits, the gang meet up at the front of the bus and are soon joined by Jeff Hardy, Marcus Cor Von, MVP, and Micheal Cole)
Jeff: (breaking into dance) Hey, you guys wanna do something fun?
HHH: This is going to involve hiding and/or dancing, isn’t it?
Jeff:(stops dancing) Uh…no, why?
Steph: Don’t worry about him Jeff, what do you have in mind?
Jeff: Well, when I was away, I did some work down here, right across the park. Nobody’s there today, maybe we could, you know, go check it out?
Steph: That sounds great, doesn’t it Hunter?
HHH: Don’t look at me, I’ve got some skee-balling to do.
MVP: Ballin’?
HHH: Yeah, you feel like coming along?
Steph: Hunter, I’m sure he’d much rather come with us, right Mortimer?
MVP: Um, it’s Montel actually.
Steph: Really? I’m sure I would’ve remembered that.
MVP: Well, yeah, but I’m pretty sure –
HHH: (whispering to MVP) Just go with it, it’s better that way. Trust me, sleeping on the couch sucks.
MVP: What?
HHH: Never mind, just go with it.
MVP: Whatever you say, man. (to Steph, still seeming apprehensive) Sure, I’d love to go, I guess.
Steph: Graet!
HHH: Yeah, you guys have fun, I’ve got prizes to collect.(he departs)
Steph: Well, we better get going. (to Flair, who is standing with Farooq) You coming, Naitch?
Flair: (shaking his head) Wooo.
Steph: OK, then, we’ll see you in a while.
(Steph and group depart, as Lashley approaches Flair and Farooq, with Arn watching from a few feet away)
Lashley: Hey guys, can I ask a question?
(Flair and Farooq stare at him)
Lashley: Cena, Kahli and Morrison won’t let me in their club because they said I’m an uncrowned champion and that doesn’t count.
Flair: Wooo?
Lashley: Well, um…do you guys know where I can get a crown? I really want to get into the – (he is cut off as Flair and Farooq both step within a few inches of him)
Flair: WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
Farooq: DAMN!
Lashley: You’re mean, I hate you both! (he runs off, screaming over his shoulder) Bathurds!
Arn: (approaching Flair and Farooq) Was that necessary?
Flair: (nodding) Woooooo.
Arn: You got me there, champ. Guess I gotta go track him down now.
(Flair and Farooq watch him depart, then head to the bar to relax)
(Scene changes to Steph, Jeff, MVP, Cor Von, and Cole entering the currently deserted Impact Zone)
Steph: You guys actually worked here?
Jeff: Yeah, it was kinda cool, you know? Lots of places to hide.
Steph: (smiling) Well, I know how much you enjoy hiding.
Jeff: You got that right. Speaking of which, I’m gonna go look around, make sure I haven’t left anything here, you know?
Steph: (smiling) Have fun.
(Jeff departs as Micheal Cole wanders through the arena and Cor Von begins walking towards the six-sided ring, seemingly in a trance)
Steph: Marcus? Marcus! What are you doing?
(Cor Von says nothing but continues towards the ring)
Steph: (to MVP) Quick, go get him, something’s wrong.
MVP: (very apprehensive, almost scared) I…I don’t know if I can.
Steph: Of course you can, now go!
(MVP begins to head to the ring, shaking as Cor Von climbs in the ring and begins circling, sniffing the turnbuckles)
Cor Von: P-p-p-Pooooooooooooooooooouuuuuuuuuuuuuunnnnnnnccccccccccuuuuuuuuhhhhhhhh! (he begins running back and forth scraming)
MVP: I can’t do this! Oh God, don’t make me do this!
Steph: What the hell is wrong with you?
MVP: It…it was awful. There were people here, and Erik Watts. Don West, screaming, screaming, Erik Watts, Oh my God, it was awful!
Steph: Get over it, just get him out of there! (she shoves MVP into the ring)
(MVP stands in the center of the ring, still screaming as Cor Von bounces off the ropes and nails him with a shoulder block)
Cor Von: Welcome to the Serengeti, PERIOD!
Micheal Cole: (now standing by the commentator’s table) OH MY!
Don West (emerging from beneath the table, gripping a handful of baseball cards) IN THE FACE! IN THE FACE! GEM MINT TEN!
Micheal Cole: (staring at West) NOT THIS WAY!
Don West: UN-BE-LEIVABLE!
Micheal Cole: (to Steph) I like him, can I keep him?
Unknown voices: (from seemingly all angles) YES! Take him with you!
Steph: Where would we put him? I’m sorry, we just can’t.
Cole: Sorry, looks like you gotta stay here.
(West slides back under the commentary table)
Steph: We really should get out of here. Come on you guys.
(MVP has rolled from the ring and is curled up in a ball shaking on the arena floor, with Cor Von still pacing the ring)
Steph: Marcus! You in there?
(he stares, not recognizing her)
Steph: For God’s sake. Cole, a bit of help here?
(Steph and Cole drag Cor Von from the ring. As his feet hit the floor, his eyes clear)
Cor Von: What happened?
Steph: You damn near killed Maurice over there, and kept screaming about the Serengeti. Does that make any sense to you?
MVP: I told you, my name’s Montel.
Steph: Whatever. Like I was saying, any idea what you were talking about?
Cor Von: No, why?
Steph: OK, where the hell’s Jeff?
Jeff: (popping out of an air duct near the ceiling) Up here!
Steph: How the hell?
Jeff: This is the best hiding place! It’s extremely extreeeeeeeeeeeme!
Steph: Well, get down here, we’re getting out of here.
Jeff: On the way, if I can just land in those crates. (he points to a group of boxes and jumps, overshooting and crashing to the floor)
(Jim Cornette emerges seemingly from nowhere)
Cornette: You missed, AGAIN, you stupid bumblef***! (he kicks Jeff in the side of the ehad) F*** you! (he then departs, disappearing into thin air)
Steph: Are you okay?
Jeff: Yeah, I hope I didn’t break my sticks.
Steph: Your what?
(Jeff holds out a packet of glow sticks)
Steph: You went all the way up…why the hell did you keep glow sticks in an air vent in the ceiling?
Jeff: Extreme? (he shrugs)
Steph: I’ll never understand you, you know that?
Jeff: Just do what I do, find hiding places.
Steph: How does that make any sense?
(Jeff says nothing, but begins gyrating and dances his way out the side door)
Steph: Come on guys.
(Cor Von, now dragging the still traumatized MVP follows, with Cole slowly bringing up the rear, staring back at the announce table, he waves and closes the door as the scene ends)
(Scene changes to HHH and Sledgie, now back at the bus, with Sledgie loaded down with two dozen large stuffed animals, while HHH looks pissed)
HHH: How does this always happen to me?
(Slegie says nothing, but leans under the weight of the large animals)
HHH: Don’t give me the modest crap. I come up with an idea, and what do you do? You steal my damn thunder, that’s what you do. Park record score in skee-ball, and you set it twice! You dn’t even have arms! This is crap!
(HHH begins tossing the animals onto the bus as Lashley and Arn approach)
Lashley: (pointing to the crown he’s now carrying) Look what I got!
HHH: (still fuming over being beaten at skee-ball) Screw off!
(Cena and Kahli appear, dragging a still hallucinating Morrison behind them)
Kahli: Blargrawr.
Cena: Look, how was I supposed to know that going to a fortune teller would make him trip out even more? All I want is to be invisible at will, is that too much to ask?
Kahli: (shrugging) Bkarg.
Cena: What?
Kahli: (taking the caramels out) I said, yes, it’s impossible. Don’t you get that?
Gerwitz: (popping out of the luggage compartment, nearly buried under stuffed animals) Caramels!
Kahli: I hate you. (he replaces the caramels) BLAAAAARGRAWR!
Gerwitz: How am I supposed to do that? I’d have to be triple jointed.
(Kahli boards the bus, brain-chopping Gerwitz as he passes)
Lashley: (still trying to get Cena’s attention) See? Look! (he holds up the crown)
Cena: Yeah, it’s a crown, so?
Lashley: I can join the club now! I’m not an uncrowned champion anymore!
Cena: But that’s not…you know what? Fine, you can come, but just stay out of the way, okay? Where’d you get the crown anyway?
Lashley: (pointing to a large Samoan man in a Hawaiian shirt) From him.
Haku: You sure I can’t talk you into that ’02 Chevy? I’ll make you a great deal on it.
(a small man is standing by Haku)
Man: Can I get a deal on it, too?
Haku: Shut up! (he slaps the Tongan deathgrip on the customer, while waving with his other hand and smiling)
(Steph and the group appear and board the bus, with Cor Von still dragging MVP behind him)
MVP: Erik Watts…Erik Watts…(his voice trails off)
(Flair and Farooq exit the bar, being escorted by half a dozen co-eds and enter the bus, taking up the entire rear section, while Lashley is still trying to get HHH’s attention)
Lashley: Guess what!
HHH: (still fuming) WHAT?
Lashley: I’m a king too!
HHH: STEPH!
Steph: (popping her head out the window) What’s up?
HHH: This day sucked. First he (pointing at Sledgie) stole my glory in the game room, now he (pointing at Lashley) says he’s a king. That’s crap, we can’t have four people with the same gimmick.
Steph: Oh let him have his moment, we won’t mention it on air.
HHH: That’s not the point and you know it!
Steph: I said let him have his moment.
HHH: Look, it was my gimmick, it’s been my gimmick, hell, it’s even in my song, that means that –
Steph: That means he’s fine, ok?
HHH: DAMN IT!
(HHH throws the last large prize animal in the luggage compartment, once again hitting the still unconscious Gerwitz in the head and boards the bus as the scene ends)
(Scene opens with the gang, plus much of the roster, loaded on the bus entering Orlando)
HHH: I hate tourist traps, why the hell are we here?
Steph: Oh be quiet, you know I always like to go check out the Mania locations in advance. Besides, summer’s almost over, and we could all use a little vacation. Everyone else is excited, why aren’t you?
HHH: Because, every time we go on one of these, I never get to have any damn fun, that’s why. It’s always meetings this and meetings that. You always tell me there will be time for skee-ball, but no, I never get to play.
(Lemmy and the gang, packed into a bunk, perk up)
Lemmy: IT’S ALL ABOUT THAT GAME, AND IF YOU CAN –
HHH: Shut up, Lemmy!
Lemmy: Ok, ok, sorry. I just thought we were on.
HHH: Well, you’re not, go back to sleep.
Lemmy: Can do. (he immediately falls asleep)
Steph: Listen, Hunter, if it will help you relax, I promise you, there will be time to have fun, alright?
HHH: Fine, but I’m holding you to it.
Steph: That’s fine, now can you just relax and enjoy the ride like everyone else is?
HHH: (glancing at Sledgie, who is sporting a Hawaiian shirt and has flip flops tied tohim) What’re you staring at?
(Sledgie, as always, says nothing)
HHH: Like hell! No way you’re winding up winning more games than me. I’m sick of you upstaging me, getting promotions. It’s my ti –
Jim Johnstone – IT’S MY TIME! IT’S MY TIME!
(HHH grabs Slegie and hits Johnstone in the head, knocking him unconscious)
HHH: SHUT UP!
(scene changes to a small room near the rear of the bus, with Cena and Kahli relaxing. A small sign on the door reads “Champions’ Clubhouse”)
Cena: See, this is the life, isn’t it? We get our own little space, talk about the pressures of being champ, isn’t it cool?
Kahli: Well, I have to say, it is quite an interesting idea, and I do find that –
Gerwitz – (over the intercom) Ahem, caramels?
Kahli: How the hell did you know?
Gerwitz: It’s like GPS, tracks the presence of candy being chewed in your area. Cost us a fortune.
Kahli: We’re on vacation!
Gerwitz: You’re still getting paid, right?
Kahli: Fine! (replaces caramels in his mouth) BLAAARGRAWARMRABRARG?
Gerwitz: Yes, I am happy, but is that kind of language really necessary?
Kahli: BLAAAAAARGRAAAAAAAAR! (grabs the intercom with both hands and squeezes, shattering it)
Cena: Damn, dude, remind me never to mention candy around you.
Kahli: Blarg.
Cena: OK, that’s cool.
(John Morrison burst in, obviously intoxicated and possibly on hallucinogens)
Cena: Hey there Johnny Thunder, how’s it going?
Morrison: It’s Nitro, and that’s not even my name anymore, man. Can we open a window, let some of these bats out?
Cena: Bats?
Morrison: Man, they’re everywhere. Say, anybody else got the urge to get naked and, you know, run around?
Kahli: Blargrawr.
Morrison: What do you mean it’s just me?
Cena: Man, what the hell are you on, anyway?
Morrison: Look, Ac e told me I’m supposed to get more into the character, right? Well, all I know is that he sang, drank, and did a bunch of acid, so, I’m figuring I’ll start there and figure the rest out as I go.
Cena: Hey, can I try something?
Morrison: I guess so, why?
(Cena begins waving his hand in front of his face furiously)
Cena: You can’t see me! You can’t see me! Dude, can you see me?
Morrison: Yeah, why?
Cena: Damn it! She promised me the invisibility spell would work this time!
Morrison: Well, when you started waving, your hand started spinning, does that count?
Cena: Spinning?
Morrison: Yeah.
Cena: That’s awesome!
(Lashley bursts in the door, tailed by Arn and Finlay)
Lashley: Hey guys!
Cena: What the hell?
Kahli: Blargrawr?
Morrison: Run, it’s a talking goldfish! (he dives into a nearby cabinet)
(Cena stares at Morrison momentarily, then looks back at Lashley)
Cena: What’d you need, man?
Lashley: I came to hang out, since I’m an uncrowned champion.
Lashley: BUT I’M AN UNCROWNED CHAMPION!
Cena: But this room is for crowned champions, sorry man, it’s the rule.
(Lashley looks to Kahli for help)
Kahli: Grawfrawr. (he shrugs)
Lashley: (looking at Arn and Finaly) But you guys said –
Arn: Bobby, we said we’d ask, we didn’t say it was definite.
Lashley: But –
Arn: Come on, let’s go watch TV.
Lashley: (glaring at Cena and Kahi as he leaves) Bathurds. (he slams the door)
(Scene changes to the parking lot of Universal Studios. The bus parks, and everyone exits, the gang meet up at the front of the bus and are soon joined by Jeff Hardy, Marcus Cor Von, MVP, and Micheal Cole)
Jeff: (breaking into dance) Hey, you guys wanna do something fun?
HHH: This is going to involve hiding and/or dancing, isn’t it?
Jeff:(stops dancing) Uh…no, why?
Steph: Don’t worry about him Jeff, what do you have in mind?
Jeff: Well, when I was away, I did some work down here, right across the park. Nobody’s there today, maybe we could, you know, go check it out?
Steph: That sounds great, doesn’t it Hunter?
HHH: Don’t look at me, I’ve got some skee-balling to do.
MVP: Ballin’?
HHH: Yeah, you feel like coming along?
Steph: Hunter, I’m sure he’d much rather come with us, right Mortimer?
MVP: Um, it’s Montel actually.
Steph: Really? I’m sure I would’ve remembered that.
MVP: Well, yeah, but I’m pretty sure –
HHH: (whispering to MVP) Just go with it, it’s better that way. Trust me, sleeping on the couch sucks.
MVP: What?
HHH: Never mind, just go with it.
MVP: Whatever you say, man. (to Steph, still seeming apprehensive) Sure, I’d love to go, I guess.
Steph: Graet!
HHH: Yeah, you guys have fun, I’ve got prizes to collect.(he departs)
Steph: Well, we better get going. (to Flair, who is standing with Farooq) You coming, Naitch?
Flair: (shaking his head) Wooo.
Steph: OK, then, we’ll see you in a while.
(Steph and group depart, as Lashley approaches Flair and Farooq, with Arn watching from a few feet away)
Lashley: Hey guys, can I ask a question?
(Flair and Farooq stare at him)
Lashley: Cena, Kahli and Morrison won’t let me in their club because they said I’m an uncrowned champion and that doesn’t count.
Flair: Wooo?
Lashley: Well, um…do you guys know where I can get a crown? I really want to get into the – (he is cut off as Flair and Farooq both step within a few inches of him)
Flair: WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
Farooq: DAMN!
Lashley: You’re mean, I hate you both! (he runs off, screaming over his shoulder) Bathurds!
Arn: (approaching Flair and Farooq) Was that necessary?
Flair: (nodding) Woooooo.
Arn: You got me there, champ. Guess I gotta go track him down now.
(Flair and Farooq watch him depart, then head to the bar to relax)
(Scene changes to Steph, Jeff, MVP, Cor Von, and Cole entering the currently deserted Impact Zone)
Steph: You guys actually worked here?
Jeff: Yeah, it was kinda cool, you know? Lots of places to hide.
Steph: (smiling) Well, I know how much you enjoy hiding.
Jeff: You got that right. Speaking of which, I’m gonna go look around, make sure I haven’t left anything here, you know?
Steph: (smiling) Have fun.
(Jeff departs as Micheal Cole wanders through the arena and Cor Von begins walking towards the six-sided ring, seemingly in a trance)
Steph: Marcus? Marcus! What are you doing?
(Cor Von says nothing but continues towards the ring)
Steph: (to MVP) Quick, go get him, something’s wrong.
MVP: (very apprehensive, almost scared) I…I don’t know if I can.
Steph: Of course you can, now go!
(MVP begins to head to the ring, shaking as Cor Von climbs in the ring and begins circling, sniffing the turnbuckles)
Cor Von: P-p-p-Pooooooooooooooooooouuuuuuuuuuuuuunnnnnnnccccccccccuuuuuuuuhhhhhhhh! (he begins running back and forth scraming)
MVP: I can’t do this! Oh God, don’t make me do this!
Steph: What the hell is wrong with you?
MVP: It…it was awful. There were people here, and Erik Watts. Don West, screaming, screaming, Erik Watts, Oh my God, it was awful!
Steph: Get over it, just get him out of there! (she shoves MVP into the ring)
(MVP stands in the center of the ring, still screaming as Cor Von bounces off the ropes and nails him with a shoulder block)
Cor Von: Welcome to the Serengeti, PERIOD!
Micheal Cole: (now standing by the commentator’s table) OH MY!
Don West (emerging from beneath the table, gripping a handful of baseball cards) IN THE FACE! IN THE FACE! GEM MINT TEN!
Micheal Cole: (staring at West) NOT THIS WAY!
Don West: UN-BE-LEIVABLE!
Micheal Cole: (to Steph) I like him, can I keep him?
Unknown voices: (from seemingly all angles) YES! Take him with you!
Steph: Where would we put him? I’m sorry, we just can’t.
Cole: Sorry, looks like you gotta stay here.
(West slides back under the commentary table)
Steph: We really should get out of here. Come on you guys.
(MVP has rolled from the ring and is curled up in a ball shaking on the arena floor, with Cor Von still pacing the ring)
Steph: Marcus! You in there?
(he stares, not recognizing her)
Steph: For God’s sake. Cole, a bit of help here?
(Steph and Cole drag Cor Von from the ring. As his feet hit the floor, his eyes clear)
Cor Von: What happened?
Steph: You damn near killed Maurice over there, and kept screaming about the Serengeti. Does that make any sense to you?
MVP: I told you, my name’s Montel.
Steph: Whatever. Like I was saying, any idea what you were talking about?
Cor Von: No, why?
Steph: OK, where the hell’s Jeff?
Jeff: (popping out of an air duct near the ceiling) Up here!
Steph: How the hell?
Jeff: This is the best hiding place! It’s extremely extreeeeeeeeeeeme!
Steph: Well, get down here, we’re getting out of here.
Jeff: On the way, if I can just land in those crates. (he points to a group of boxes and jumps, overshooting and crashing to the floor)
(Jim Cornette emerges seemingly from nowhere)
Cornette: You missed, AGAIN, you stupid bumblef***! (he kicks Jeff in the side of the ehad) F*** you! (he then departs, disappearing into thin air)
Steph: Are you okay?
Jeff: Yeah, I hope I didn’t break my sticks.
Steph: Your what?
(Jeff holds out a packet of glow sticks)
Steph: You went all the way up…why the hell did you keep glow sticks in an air vent in the ceiling?
Jeff: Extreme? (he shrugs)
Steph: I’ll never understand you, you know that?
Jeff: Just do what I do, find hiding places.
Steph: How does that make any sense?
(Jeff says nothing, but begins gyrating and dances his way out the side door)
Steph: Come on guys.
(Cor Von, now dragging the still traumatized MVP follows, with Cole slowly bringing up the rear, staring back at the announce table, he waves and closes the door as the scene ends)
(Scene changes to HHH and Sledgie, now back at the bus, with Sledgie loaded down with two dozen large stuffed animals, while HHH looks pissed)
HHH: How does this always happen to me?
(Slegie says nothing, but leans under the weight of the large animals)
HHH: Don’t give me the modest crap. I come up with an idea, and what do you do? You steal my damn thunder, that’s what you do. Park record score in skee-ball, and you set it twice! You dn’t even have arms! This is crap!
(HHH begins tossing the animals onto the bus as Lashley and Arn approach)
Lashley: (pointing to the crown he’s now carrying) Look what I got!
HHH: (still fuming over being beaten at skee-ball) Screw off!
(Cena and Kahli appear, dragging a still hallucinating Morrison behind them)
Kahli: Blargrawr.
Cena: Look, how was I supposed to know that going to a fortune teller would make him trip out even more? All I want is to be invisible at will, is that too much to ask?
Kahli: (shrugging) Bkarg.
Cena: What?
Kahli: (taking the caramels out) I said, yes, it’s impossible. Don’t you get that?
Gerwitz: (popping out of the luggage compartment, nearly buried under stuffed animals) Caramels!
Kahli: I hate you. (he replaces the caramels) BLAAAAARGRAWR!
Gerwitz: How am I supposed to do that? I’d have to be triple jointed.
(Kahli boards the bus, brain-chopping Gerwitz as he passes)
Lashley: (still trying to get Cena’s attention) See? Look! (he holds up the crown)
Cena: Yeah, it’s a crown, so?
Lashley: I can join the club now! I’m not an uncrowned champion anymore!
Cena: But that’s not…you know what? Fine, you can come, but just stay out of the way, okay? Where’d you get the crown anyway?
Lashley: (pointing to a large Samoan man in a Hawaiian shirt) From him.
Haku: You sure I can’t talk you into that ’02 Chevy? I’ll make you a great deal on it.
(a small man is standing by Haku)
Man: Can I get a deal on it, too?
Haku: Shut up! (he slaps the Tongan deathgrip on the customer, while waving with his other hand and smiling)
(Steph and the group appear and board the bus, with Cor Von still dragging MVP behind him)
MVP: Erik Watts…Erik Watts…(his voice trails off)
(Flair and Farooq exit the bar, being escorted by half a dozen co-eds and enter the bus, taking up the entire rear section, while Lashley is still trying to get HHH’s attention)
Lashley: Guess what!
HHH: (still fuming) WHAT?
Lashley: I’m a king too!
HHH: STEPH!
Steph: (popping her head out the window) What’s up?
HHH: This day sucked. First he (pointing at Sledgie) stole my glory in the game room, now he (pointing at Lashley) says he’s a king. That’s crap, we can’t have four people with the same gimmick.
Steph: Oh let him have his moment, we won’t mention it on air.
HHH: That’s not the point and you know it!
Steph: I said let him have his moment.
HHH: Look, it was my gimmick, it’s been my gimmick, hell, it’s even in my song, that means that –
Steph: That means he’s fine, ok?
HHH: DAMN IT!
(HHH throws the last large prize animal in the luggage compartment, once again hitting the still unconscious Gerwitz in the head and boards the bus as the scene ends)
helped $lim jinx NXT. Woops
