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Post by Tha Kid Joker on May 8, 2007 6:57:28 GMT -5
The excited crowd in the arena are buzzing with excitement after witnessing all of these tremendous athletes sign up for Toom E.'s House Party III (TEHPIII, or Teh Pee, as some pronounce it). Once the camera fades out from the previous person writing their name down and the tron fades to black, it doesn't take long for the lights in the arena to swirl as an increasingly recognizable Italian intro plays...
After the few seconds that it takes for the intro to play, it's only a matter of time before the equally recognizable "People... It feels so good to be back!" plays, and "Square Dance" is in full swing. The crowd give a somewhat mixed reaction of mostly cheers as the reigning EWT Ox-Division Champion struts out from the back, proudly showing off his title. He rocks dark blue jeans with large, deep-red dragons sewn into the side (his emblem, see sprite on his profile) and a matching Affliction T-Shirt. On his head are his signature sunglasses, and a snow cap that causes him to look very similar to Edge. He walks down to the ring and climbs onto the apron, nodding up at a young girl sitting in the third row before getting in the ring. Cassinova climbs the turnbuckle and spreads his arms in the Randy Orton pose, taking the time to soak in the reaction before climbing down and posing in the center of the ring. At this point, pyros shoot from the turnbuckles and confetti falls in the ring, with Cassinova still posed in the center of the ring and at the center of attention.
After a while of the theatrics, Cassinova asks for and receives a microphone, brushing all of the confetti off of him and raising the mic to his lips. He smirks and looks at the camera as he music fades out.Cassinova: Not to be unoriginal, but The Champ... is... The crowd simultaneously yell "Here!" just as Cass finishes his sentence.Cassinova: ... Dead sexy! Am I not right? Damn this outfit cost me a pretty penny, but it was worth it. I mean, I had to look good for... uh... hm... just where the hell are we tonight, anyway? ( Slight boos.) Ah, whatever. But in all seriousness folks, I didn't come out here to talk about my retainment of the title, my show-stealing match, my amazing after-party, or anything else like that. I came out here, to thank you all. The crowd cheers loudly for being acknowledged, as Cassinova continues.Cassinova: You all looked past what I have done in the past, and what I will probably end up doing in the future, and realized that I am not perfect. I know this may come as a shock for those who deem me a direct blessing from God... I am a human. I make mistakes, and I learn from them. Regardless, you people stuck with me through it all, and you continue to stand behind me. So, I would just like to thank you... The crowd cheers once more as Cassinova tilts his head down. After a few seconds, the crowd gives as shocked gasp as Cass looks back up and...Cassinova: ...For being the fickle, pathetic, trailer-trash people who enhance my paycheck by buying my merchandise and lighting up the search engines with my name. Thank you for only cheering for me when you knew I was going to make it to the top, and thank you for being the jackasses who I'm forced to sign autographs for at every stupid local hick carnival that this company forces me to go to. Keep buying my stuff, no ladies, I will not degrade myself by posing for Playgirl, and Lauren, I lost your number. Hit me up. The crowd boos loudly at this sudden turn of events, but Cassinova just yells right back.Cassinova: Oh, don't pretend you're the victims! You brought this on yourself! You act like I didn't read the message boards and hear the gossip! I've read those "prediction threads" and such, and you all thought I couldn't do it! People who normally praised me and said I showed perhaps the most promise out of this bland, faceless new guys said that Crauswell would beat me... destroy me and walk out with the title. Hah, well... Cassinova looks down after this emotional outburst, before shaking his head and deciding not to say anymore. He throws the microphone on the ground to deafening boos by the betrayed-feeling fans, and prepares to exit the ring as his music plays once more...
Before "Square Dance" is suddenly replaces by "Faint" by Linkin Park! The song blares throughout the speakers, causing the fans to make a complete 180 as far as their reaction goes. Loud cheers are given as Chad Michaels walks out from behind the curtain, as serious as ever and slightly pissed looking. Cassinova backs into the ring and picks up his microphone as Chad slides in as well. Chad already has a microphone in his hand, and simply stares down Cassinova as Cass gives the same angry/confused look he had last night. Chad Michaels clenches his fists and lowers his head as his music fades out and Cassinova raises his microphone.Cassinova: ...Who the hell are you? Chad Michaels slowly raises his head and smirks at the dumb question, before raising the microphone as well.Michaels: ...I knew a dunce like you would say something as dumb as that. The crowd pops for Chad's response, while Cassinova just gets angrier.Cassinova: What? Oh, hell no. I believe thems is fightin' words. Michaels: ...Save it. Knowing you would give me your usual "I'm not aware of my surroundings" response, I had the nice people in the back put together a little something to remind you of who I am... Chad points at the tron, which illuminates into what is basically a spiffy little music video of the highlights from the Cassinova/Chad Michaels ladder match from Season's Beatings, set to SOAD's "Question!". The video features Cassinova's dragoncanrana off of a ladder from the outside of the ring to the inside, Chad Michaels' Colibri that drove Cassinova's head into the top of the ladder and dropped him 20 feet, Cassinova's double-foot stomp onto Chad's head that dangled off of an elevated horizontal ladder, Chad's Coca-Cola Cliff-Drop onto said elevated ladder, and many more sweet spots.
The video finishes off with the clip of Cassinova delivering the California DreamDriver to Chad from the top of the ladder, climbing back up and winning the match. Following this, the video fades out and the camera returns to Cass and Chad inside of the ring. Cass just looks at Chad in amazement and takes off his sunglasses to look at him. After a closer look, Cass seems to be in a pleasant shock, before speaking again.Cassinova: Holy crap! ...You're the kid I dismantled to make it to the top! What's been good with you, man? Still failing? Did my predictions come true, with my career skyrocketing and you still remaining the Marty Jannetty to Mike Corral's Shawn Michaels... Michaels: Oh, shut up! I, as well as everyone watching, am sick of hearing your trying-too-hard-to-be-clever comments and your dumb jokes. The crowd once again pops, as someone has finally put Cassinova in his place. Cass just raises an eyebrow at this, before taking his turn to speak.Cassinova: Christ, man. I realize how pissed you must be that you had to use your last sick day at the Burger Barn to come here tonight, but no need to blow up on me. Just what are you here for, anyway? I'm not giving you a shot at this title, if that's what you're thinking. Michaels: Oh, not at all. I just wanted to give you your receipt for what you did to Synthy. Cassinova looks genuinely confused, in that ditzy-but-still-cute, male version of Jessica Simpson kind of way.Cassinova: Uh... Michaels: ( Mocking) Uh... uh... you know exactly what I'm talking about. You may have beaten me before, but I've destroyed people twice the man that you are, and I'll do the same to you without hesitation. Cassinova: Oh, quit pandering. And I have no idea what you're talking about, really! I don't even know who that person is! Michaels: Big surprise! You didn't know who I was, and we fought in a show-stealing match a few months ago! Cassinova: Psh, hello? Look who you're talking to! All of my matches are show-stealers! You're just a nameless face on the list of people I've beaten. Oh! Forgot to update, give me a sec. Cass goes on to produce a pad and a pen, writing something down.Cassinova: Falcon-lad... and the Strawberry Sugar Pets. And... done. He puts the paper and pen away, turning back to Michaels.Cassinova: Now... what were we talking about? Michaels, who has tried not to let his frustrations get the best of him this entire segment, scowls a little bit and looks to the side.Michaels: ...Funny, I had just got done talking. With that, Michaels takes his shirt off and drops it to the ground. Girly squeals of delight can be heard as he eggs Cass on to fight. Cass raises an eyebrow and talks a step back.Cassinova: Oh, what's this? An arms race? You're not the only person around here with a membership to Gold's Gym. Immediately after, Cassinova also takes his shirt off to more girly squeals. The two look like they're ready to come to blows...
Before "Violence Fetish" by Disturbed hits, causing Joe Ragnal to emerge from the curtains. Chad immediately whips around to glare at Ragnal, and Cassinova backs off of him. Ragnal stares right back into the eyes of Chad Michaels, before appearing caught off-guard at something. He looks around himself, wondering where Synthy Eris is, before retreating behind the curtain to retrieve her. Eventually, he once again comes through the curtain, this time pulling something with all his might. After a while of this, he finally pulls Synthy out onto the stage, and everything in the arena stops. People stop moving, blinking, and breathing. The music stops. The sounds stops. Everything is still. All eyes are on Synthy Eris, who stuns everyone...
...As she is decked on in full Marilyn Monroe clothing. Her hair is all did-up, she has make-up on, and a little beauty mark was even drawn on her face. She stands in silence as everyone just stares at her silently, before the inevitable stifled laugh of Cassinova gets everyone to crack up. All but Synthy, Joe, and Chad are in stitches, as Synthy marches down to the ring with Joe following closely behind. She slides into the ring amidst playful cat calls from the crowd, and runs towards Cassinova shortly before Joe catches and holds her back. She uses every ounce of strength in her body to attempt to get to the Ox-Division Champion, who almost can't breathe from laughing so hard.
Meanwhile, once Joe has managed to withstrain her, he turns his attention to Chad Michaels. He and Synthy are each handed a microphone, as Synthy speaks up first.Synthy: ( Glaring at Cass) ...I... am going... to kill you... Cass' laughs suddenly end, as he starts to look really uncomfortable. He tries not to let her cold tone get to him, as he instead attempts to focus on happier things. As he does this, it's Joe's turn to talk.Joe: Chad Michaels... fancy finding you here. Imagine my surprise: Me and Synthy are on our way to the ring to confront the low-intelligence metrosexual, only to find the other one is already out here... Some "Yo Momma"-ish "Ohhhh!"s from the crowd manage to be heard.Michaels: Cute. So, is that why you're out here? To spit some frilly little pieces of wit that I'd expect from ol' Cass over here? Joe: ( Switching his glance from Chad to Cass and back again.) Possibly. Possibly not. Michaels: Yeah right... Look Joseph, I've already beaten you in your own match, becoming the first non-Ragnal to do so. You stole Synthy from me, I stole you guys' streak from you. Nowhere near a fair bargain, but hey, it's something. Joe: Oh stop it right there. Me and Synthy are strictly business partners. ( Chad rolls his eyes. Cass stands to their right side, directly in the center of them from where the camera angle is.) You can't blame the fact that you're lame on me. Cass raises his fist to his own mouth like someone would after hearing a harsh joke. Chad raises his microphone as Cass does this.Michaels: Hardy-har-har. I'm far from lame, Joey, and I'll be the apple of Synthy's eye someday. ( Currently, Synthy is too busy trying not to kill Cassinova... and trying to keep her skirt from flying up like in the movies.) And once I am, looks like you'll be back to making out with your pillow, momma's boy. Cassinova lets out a "Burn!!!" at this last joke. Joe raises the microphone next.Joe: Michaels, cut the crap. Once I get done killing this Hollywood primadona for ruining the match Synthy trained so hard for, I might put aside some extra time to get back to you. Okay? Ciao. Joe then turns to Cassinova and begins to say something, but Chad Michaels whips him back around to face him. The two get almost nose-to-nose, and Cassinova lifts his mic.Cassinova: Uh... yeah. Sorry Chad, but this guy has a crazy psycho chick beside him, and I don't know what either of these people are capable of. Plus, I kinda hate you way more than anyone I've ever met... Seriously. At least Crauswell was difficult to beat and worthy of respect. So... I'm kinda siding with the Innovator of SUN. Joe: FUN. Cassinova: That's what I said. SUN. With that, Cassinova jumps to Joe and Synthy's side to attempt to gang up on Chad, but the two simply push Cassinova to the other side of the ring. Cass stumbles and lifts his mic in surprise.Cassinova: Oh, so that's how it's gonna be, huh? Fine. I hope you two kill eachother. Leave the chick though. I don't really like her, but she broke the heart of the guy with the triple rehashed gimmick over here, and that I like. But yeah, good luck ripping eachother's throats out. Cassinova hops on the turnbuckle and waits to pick up the pieces of whatever's left of these two when they get done fighting, and it appears as if it's actually going to come to that. Much like the earlier standoff, Joe Ragnal and Chad Michaels get into stances and look as if they're going to fight, before...
"Listen up, turn it up and rock it out party on, I wanna hear you scream and shout this is real, as real as it gets I came to get down to get some f***ing respect taking it back to hardcore level you better be ready, put your pedal to the metal taking it back to hardcore level you better be ready, put your pedal to the metal!"
A few riffs from the guitar follow this, before Papa Roach's "...To Be Loved" plays at full force, signaling the entrance of Mike Corral! Corral walks out to the biggest pop so far, making a beeline towards the ring and sliding into it. He pulls Chad away from Joe and asks for a microphone of his own. After getting one, he stands beside Chad and speaks into it.Corral: So... what seems to be the problem here? Cassinova: Hey, I know you! You're the Shawn Michaels to Chad's Marty Jannetty! ( He grins like an idiot and extends a hand to Mike Corral.) Corral: ...Who the hell are you? Cassinova: ( Frowning and pulling his hand back.) ...That's my line.... Corral: Kidding. Of course I know who you are. Had a little beef with Chad a while back, current Ox Champ, etc. etc. Pretty good wrestler. Cassinova: Thanks. I know. Corral: Whatever. Not as good as Rated X of course, but eh... you're okay. Anyway, back to bigger fish. ( He turns to Joe as Cass looks offended.) You two. Joe Ragnal and Synthy Eris. Don't think that I haven't been paying attention to what's been going on with you guys. The antagonizing, the mind games, the LOVE SCANDALS! ( He says this last thing right into Synthy's face. She's already EXTREMELY pissed from having to wear that ridiculous get-up, and now people are just pushing her to her limits.) And you know what? I'm tired of standing for it. Chad is more than capable of handling this on his own, but I'm his friend, and I refuse to sit back and watch this take place. Sure, he could take little Joey Raggle about as easily as I can take Milky Raggle, but hey, just letting you all know that he has back-up. So... if you have something to say. Say it now. The stand-off continues, with the original incarnation of Rated X staring into the eyes of Joe Ragnal. Synthy is slowly counting to one-hundred, attempting not to strangle Cassinova for what he did at CAM, while Cass himself is wondering how his short heel-turn promo has gone horribly, horribly wrong. Everything is one again at a boiling point...
Before Linkin Park's "High Voltage" hits, sending the crowd into a fury of boos louder than any heard tonight so far. Sure enough, EWT World Heavyweight Champion Mike Ragnal walks out, title on his shoulder and microphone in hand. He walks slowly down to the ring, with everyone on the inside waiting on him. He finally gets on the apron and climbs into the ring, standing in between Rated X and his brother, Joe.Mike: So... here we are, folks. A day off of my title retainment, and another day added on to my eventual record-breaking reign. And what an interesting group of people we have here! Two guys named Mike: Me and Corral. Two Ragnals: Me and Joe. Two champs: Me and Cassinova, and the only category I'm not in, two chicks. Synthy and... well, I'll let you all decide who's the second person there. Almost immediately, everyone (including people in the crowd) points at Cassinova. He attempts to point at one of them, but somehow manages to point to himself. Dumbly, he stomps his foot and pouts before turning his back to them in frustration. They continue without worrying too much about him.Mike: Anyway... I hear that you all are trying to pick a fight with my brother here. Hah, well, despite certain misinformed sources saying that I wouldn't help him if he needed it, I'm down for anything that he's down for, and I have his back 100% percent. ( He and Joe dap eachother.) So... if any of you TNA rejects want to pick a fight with Joe Ragnal... you're going to have to answer to Mike Ragnal as well. Naturally, the crowd boos Mike Ragnal's words, but some cheers are mixed in there. Cass walks beside Ragnal and puts his arm around him like they've been friends since second grade, making a face at Rated X and throwing up a sign as if saying "Bring it." Ragnal calmly turns his head to look at Cassinova...Mike: ...Get off of me. Cass quickly obliges, but tries not to make it too obvious that Ragnal put him in check. Eventually, Corral smirks and takes a step toward Ragnal.Corral: Goinng to have to answer to you, eh? Heh, well...That's just what I was hoping for. The crowd pops, and we are once again at another stand-off. Rated-X and los hermanos Ragnal are prepared to resort to fists, while Cassinova and Synthy continue to look on. Eventually, Cassinova manages to edge toward Synthy and whisper in her ear...Cassinova: So... who's your pick?Synthy: ( Whispering back) Well... can't really bet against J.. Wait, get the hell away from me! Synthy pushes Cassinova away as the two teams are still preparing to fight, and even after the ring looks as if it could be more packed...
"Anna Tsuchiya's Rose" hits, once again bringing the crowd to their feet. Juri wastes no time before slowly and gracefully walking out... now decked out in a tradional Japanese Kimono. Cassinova told her she had to "Wear whatever her people wear", and it seems as if she didn't stray from those directions. She takes slow, small steps amongst a lot of laughter from the crowd, and Cass practically dives out of the ring to meet her at the bottom of the ramp.Cassinova: Jewelry! Wow, you look... eh... yeah. What happened? Juri: ( microphone in hand) With... Cassinova: You! I told you to wear what your people wear, but I meant Mexicano women. Jeez... what's with the poncho? The eyes of Juri, who told herself she wasn't going to say anything negative to this man, widen as she listens to him call her kimono a poncho. Synthy leans forward on the ropes behind Cassinova, simply giving Juri a "Can I kill him now?" type of face. Juri shakes her head "No" at Synthy, while Cassinova continues to be an idiot.Cassinova: You know what? It's okay. It's what's on the inside that counts, right? ( He scans Juri, probably thinking to himself: "Inside of that shirt...") It just seems as if my plan to get you to show how pretty you are backfired... Juri raises an eyebrow at Cass' comments, that the tradional Japanese clothing isn't very beautiful in his eyes.Juri: Oh? So... are you letting me off the stipulation? Cassinova: Hah! Eh... no. Can't you wear something else that you people wear? I want you to dress up, but all of this make-up and stuff on you is really screwed up. So... pick a new outfit! Juri: ... With that, Juri slowly turns and prepares to leave, forgetting what she came out here to say to Cassinova. Cass quickly runs to her and gets in front of her, while the people in the ring look on with interest.Cassinova: Woah, hold on. Where're you going? Juri: Backst... Cassinova: No you aren't! We haven't gotten a chance to even properly meet yet. ( Extends a hand.) Hi. I'm Cassidy, god's gift to wrestling, women, and the general public. Juri: ( Staring at the hand.) The same hand that hit me on Sunday... Cassinova: Oh come on, let bygones be bygones. I'm sorry about that, but it was the only thing I could do. I didn't want you to lose, but I couldn't have you win... Ah, to hell wth it. Wanna get married? Juri: No! Cassinova: How about a vacation to Mexico so you can see your family! Juri: I'm not Mexican! Cassinova: ...Puerto Rico? Juri: Ugh! Synthy! That's all Synthy needed to hear. She slides out of the ring and quickly approaches Cassinova. Cass sees her and hops into the crowd, briskly walking through them and hopping back out ringside. He slides into the ring and takes his snow cap off, feeling sort of hot.Cassinova: Come on, that is uncalled for! I gave you two an opportunity to change up your style, and you repay me by trying to kill me?! ( Suddenly lowering his voice.) I didn't mean to yell at you, Jewelry... ( Raising it again.) But still! Finally, Corral has had enough.Corral: Dude, if you'd mind... we're trying to have a fight here. Cassinova: Don't talk to me like that! This is my segment! My time to talk! I'm the freaking Ox-Division Champion, dude. When was the last time you and your team of rip-offs had a title? Huh? What was that? "Not in a long-ass time?" Yeah, thought so! Cassinova pushes Mike Corral, who responds by pushing him clear across the ring! Mike Ragnal uses this time to suddenly punch Corral in the face, and all hell breaks loose! Rated X and the Ragnals begin to scrap as Cassinova swiftly rolls out of the ring, heading back toward Juri and Synthy. Juri manages to restrain Synthy as Cassinova passes. He looks at Juri, holding his ribs, and cocks an eyebrow.Cassinova: So... sure you don't want to get married? Juri: YES! Cassinova: Gotcha. With that, Cassinova raises his title once more to a few boos, but everyone else is meanwhile watching the action in the ring. Cass heads to the back as referees and security run past him, sliding into the ring and attempting to separate everyone. Juri and Synthy both simultaneously shrug and head backstage, talking about something completely different, as a loud "Let them fight!" chant commenses, right before we...FADE TO COMMERCIAL
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Post by The Bad Man on May 8, 2007 8:54:22 GMT -5
We return to ringside where the speakers suddenly pick up the voice' Ooooooooh, What a Rush!!' followed by some heavy music.
LILLIAN: The following match is for one fall and is a tag team bout, introducing first, the team of Animal and Hawk ...
Out from the back walks Animal and Hawk, there spiked shoulder pads creating excitement in the crowd.
LILLIAN: They hail from Chicago, Illinois and weigh in at around 530lbs ... The Legion of Doom!
The crowd cheers as the pair walk up the steps and into the ring. They point to the crowd from the 2nd rope and then start removing there shoulder pads, meanwhile Praeludium in D Minor by Johann Pachelbel begins to play which the crowd is not pleased about
LILLIAN: There opponents, hail from Bad Axe, Michigan and weigh in at a staggering 830lbs ... they are Mr. Big and Mr. Bad, Big and Bad!
The crowd jeers as out from the back walk the largest tag team in EWT history. Side by side the pair walk the aisle there girth enough to block out the stage lights. They reach the ring and enter via the steps. Mr. Big removes his sunglasses, whilst Mr. Badremains on the apron.
JOSH MATTHEWS: Hello everyone. and welcome to another exhilerating EWT match right off the back of Crap-A-Mania!!!! Alongside me tonight is the Lethal Weapon 'Steve Blackman'!
STEVE BLACKMAN: Hello.
The Bell Rings
Hawka dn Mr. Big look to be starting things off in this match. Hawk not a man to be intimidated by anyone meets Mr. Big in the centre of the ring. They bump chests neither man backing down before Mr. Big throws the first punch. They are off with a series of clubbbing blows battering each other. Hawk seems to gain the advanatge and runs off the ropes and clotheslines the giant Mr. Big but fails to knock him down, he tries again but still Mr. Big won't go down. Hawk goes for a third powerful clothesline but Mr. Big saw it coming and lifts Hawk up and bodyslams him into the mat. Mr. Big is about to go for an elbow drop when Hawk rolls to his corner and tags in Animal.
JOSH MATTEWS: The beef is in the ring now Steve, Animal the power man of the Legion of Doom!
STEVE BLACKMAN: You are correct.
Mr. Big decides to tag in Mr. Bad at this point. So now Mr. Bad is facing off againts Animal. Animal goes to confront Mr. Bad but gets a strike to the throat almost immeadiatly. Mr. Bad is not following the rules here as he goes to town on animal's neck with a few more karate style strikes and follows with a blatant two handed choke. Animal fights this hold off with a few right hands of his own to the gnarled head of Mr. Bad. Animal now in some semblance of control knees Mr. Bad in his immense gut and attempts a bodyslam.
JOSH: Can he do it? Can he move that immense girth?
STEVE BLACKMAN: No.
Mr. Bad just proves too heavy for Animal and falls on top of him crushing him under his enormous bulk. Mr. Bad gets up and goes to tag Mr. Big.
JOSH: Wait did Mr. Big just hand something to Mr. Bad there Steve?
STEVE: Perhaps.
JOSH: What do you mean perhaps, I'm sure I saw a small hammer being paseed there, you don't seem to excited about this match Steve.
STEVE: In my own way, I am.
Back in the ring and Animal is on the recieving end of some severe punishment as Mr. Big has powerslammed him and dropped a massive leg acorss his chest. Big covers ...
1,2 ...
Animal kicks out, he needs the tag but Mr. Big is still on himand takes a huge powerbomb. Big makes another cover ...
1,2 ...
Hawk breaks up the pinfall with a stomp to the back of Mr. Big. Mr. Big tries ot get at Hawk but the referee steps in the way. Animal uses this moment to recover and is there to greet Mr. Big when he goes back to him with a large dropkick. Mr. Big staggers and Animal in a move of power and desperation hits a severe shoulder block sending both men down. Mr. Big struggles back up to his feet and heads over to make the tag to Mr. Bad. Animal is nearly reaching Hawk ... Mr. Bad is tagged in ... as is Hawk!
The crowd cheers on Hawk.
Hawk charges forward catching Mr. Bad off his game with a series of stiff forearms and then throwing him into the ropes. Mr. Bad runs (Well he would calll it running, we might call it the Vito waddle) off the ropes and heads back towards Hawk. Hawk is ready and clobbers him with a clothesline that knocks Mr. Bad down. Hawk covers ...
1,2 ...
Mr. Bad kicks out rather easily and struggles ot his feet, his immense mass slowing his process. Hawk heads to the top rope clearly looking for a way to keep MR. Bad down. Meanwhile on the outside Mr. Big has made his way round to where Animal is still recovering and pulled him off the apron. The referee distracted goes to admonish Mr. Big but fails to notice Mr. Bad has pulled out a small hammer from his folds of fat. Hawk leaps looking for a flying lariat but gets a hammer to the skull instead.
JOSH: Good grief, Mr. Bad should be banned from EWT altogether for that move!
On the outside Mr. Big has thrown Animal into the steel steps and then walked to his corner. the referee returns tothe main match. Hawk has rolled through the hammer attack and pain to his feet but is instantly grabbed by Mr. Bad in The Bayanhongor Fracture Clasp. The searing pain is too much for Hawk who submits.
Bell rings
LILLIAN: The winners of the match, big and Bad!!
As the dinge of classical music plays the crowd boos the monstorus pair, they are uninterested in the fans opinions and head to the back, another victory under the vast weight.
(cut to 'A do not try this at Home' safety video)
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Post by xombiehiphop on May 8, 2007 10:36:56 GMT -5
The scene opens to find the four members of The Draugr crowded around the TLC Rumble sign up sheet. Ghost Face scrolls his finger along a few of the names that have been jotted down. His words coming out in a whispered hiss..
Ghost Face: ..Blood sucking, parasitic little ticks..
After removing a pen from his jacket he jots down his name. Passing it off to Corpse..
Corpse: ..IfWeWereToObtainControlOfTheEWTAllWouldBeForcedToDrownInASeaOfBlood..GaspingForAirOnlyToFindThatWeHaveCutOffAllOfTheirOxygen..
He speaks in a frantic, rambling manner. Soon placing his signature upon the list as well. Wraith is handed the pen. Wraith takes the pen and begins to stab away at a pair of finger tips until a few small lacerations appear. He leaves a signature in the form of two bloody finger prints. Karma steps forward. She stares at the list looking a bit hesitant. Ghost Face leans forward, speaking into her ear
Ghost Face: ..You believe me don't you? You believe us? ..Don't reject it..I know it must hurt but it's something you'll get used to..
Karma responds by releasing a feral screech, scooping up a nearby trash can and chucking it across the hallway. She storms off, leaving a trail of destruction in her wake. Her screams echoing in the distance. The three males of The Draugr exchange glances and shrugs. Corpse writes down Karma's name before they trail after her..
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Spyke the Pacers Fan
El Dandy
Still hates himself for missing the last episode of Murder She Wrote
Go Indiana!
Posts: 8,061
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Post by Spyke the Pacers Fan on May 8, 2007 12:02:40 GMT -5
*Spyke approaches the TLC Rumble sheet*
Spyke: "Sweet! Spyyyyykkkeeee Johaaaaannnnsonnnnn... there, signed up."
**Fade to next segment*
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Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
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Post by Deleted on May 8, 2007 19:00:13 GMT -5
*The camera fades into the EWT arena.*
Finkel: The following contest is a 6-man tag match, scheduled for ONE fall! Already in the ring...The Natural Disasters and One Man Gang!
*the three pace about the ring, anxiously awaiting their match.*
Finkel: And their opponents...
*The lights go out, replaced by multicolor lights and strobes as Megadeth’s “Peace Sells” blasts over the speakers. The Jaguar rolls onto the stage--it is none other than TJT, and Jack Jupiter. Then they commence their unique entrance--Jack in the back.*
Fink: Being accompanied by Terina, from San Diego, California, at a total combined weight of 675 pounds...Jimmy Thunder, Jason Jupiter, and Jack Jupiter!
*The entrance continues, albeit Terina simply waits outside the ring as the men slide in. The Jupiters take position on the outside, as Jimmy Thunder decides to start the action with O.M.G. The referee rings the bell, and the two lockup--the match has begun!*
*Thunder is quickly pushed into one of the neutral corners by Gang, recieving a big elbow to the side of the head and a few shoulders to the midsection. he prepares to hit Jim with a chop straight to the chest, but before he can, holding onto the ropes, Jimmy slides sideways and dodges, switching places in the corner with Gang and unleashing a few big punches to the head of the big man. A few even shots between them take away Thunder's attempt at momentum, till he gets angry, that is. Just when the Gang thinks he has some form of advantage building, Jimmy unleashes the Thunder Blaze on him--twenty nine punches worth. O.M.G. tries to cover himself, but unfortunately for him, his arms get sore past the tenth punch and he lets his guard down, suffering a piston-chain of pummeling blows. Thunder hooks him around and lifts him, dropping him back with a Thunder Suplex. He goes for the cover.*
1!
2!
KICKOUT.
*Thunder makes the tag to Jason Jupiter, who comes in and gives the Gang a running leg drop. He quickly applies a sleeper hold, locking it around the head of Gang as if he were a python constricting a big, juicy rat, his arms coiling tighter and tighter. The ref drops the arm once—then he goes to drop it again, but the big man isn’t out of it yet. Powering out, he elbows Jupiter in the stomach twice and flops over to his corner, tagging in Earthquake. Quake and Jason meet in the center of the ring, but Jason quickly tags in Jack. Confronting one another, Jack measures up Earthquake and delivers a few chops to the chest, but the big man is hardly fazed by them. Instead, Quake delivers a chop of his own, sending Jack in reeling, and follows up with another few chops. With Jack clutching at his chest, Quake hits a pretty well-placed dropkick on him and drops an elbow, going for the pin on the youngster.*
1!
2!
KICKOUT!
*Jack gets the shoulder up and rolls away from Earthquake, who gets up and tags Typhoon in. Just as Jack gets up, the big man runs into the ropes, preparing to bounce off and hit a clothesline. But, as he runs in, he feels a tugging that stops him immediately. Turning around, he notices Terina holding onto his ankle. She immediately lets go and climbs up onto the apron, arguing with him and a rather cantankerous ref. As the two are facing away from the others, Jimmy Thunder and Jason Jupiter bolt in from behind and elbow and forearm him from behind. As he prepares to turn around, they double back Suplex him onto the mat. Before Quake and Gang can get in and make the save, Thunder and Jupiter run at them and baseball slide their legs, dropping them to the floor as the two men of TJT slide out and hide behind the apron. Terina drops down, and the ref turns around, seeing a downed Typhoon and Jack Jupiter scaling the turnbuckle. Leaping off the turnbuckle, he lands a Jupitersault and hooks a leg.*
1!
2!
3!
Finkel: Here is your winner….TJT and JACK…JUPITER!
*”Peace Sells” starts up, as Terina, Jack, and Thunder and Jupiter meet at the end of the ramp and make their way up, grinning almost fiendishly with Jack’s arms raised high. The camera fades out to our next segment.*
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Post by liontamer12 on May 9, 2007 1:10:40 GMT -5
*Camera fades in on Sum Guy, holding a Bob Barker type mic*
Sum Guy: Hello everyone, and welcome back to EWT Heatvelocityimpact. I'm Sum Guy and I have Erectile Dysfunction. I'm here with John "The Lion" Valentine, a newcomer here in the EWT. John, tell me about your experience in EWT thus far.
The Lion: You know, the EWT has been a tough challenge for me and I'm still trying to find my niche.
Sum Guy: We all agree you're a little wet behind your ears still, but losing twice in a row...and not only that, but they're old and fat...what about that?
The Lion: ....Okay...you have to realize that I was tricked by Bastion and Snuka is a well-polished wrestler with a lot of experience in the ring. You said it yourself, "I'm still wet behind the ears."
Sum Guy: Would you say that that's a figure of speech, or do you still have some wet residue from Bastion Booger's ass?
The Lion: That's it!
*John "The Lion" Valentine rears back for his signature Lion Chop (pulls back hand like pulling back the string on a bow and delivers a hard knife-edge chop to the throat) and misses, when Sum Guy ducks under. Sum Guy punches The Lion in the stomach and knees him so hard on the nose it begins to bleed.*
Sum Guy: I AM SO TIRED OF GETTING THE S*** KICKED OUT OF ME!
*Sum Guy pushes Valentine down, camera moves to Valentine with tears in his eyes and blood dripping down from his nose.*
The Lion: That Son of a B****!
*Camera cuts to the next segment.*
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Post by Mella Drom Attoc on May 9, 2007 13:05:31 GMT -5
*We cut to the interior of a locker room, which has been spruced up beyond belief, not to mention being made out to look as big as nearly three other locker-rooms, the room divided into three separate areas, each area with a distinct design. The camera looks over, as a familiar man is sitting in a comfy looking recliner, reading a copy of Entertainment Weekly as he dons a pair of reading glasses. He looks quite angry as he gazes over this article it seems.*
Tim: HOW DARE THEY GIVE THE JUSTIFIER A QUARTER STAR REVIEW! Do they know who I am?! The creators of this rag need to be taken out back and shot in the face with a damn six gauge!
*The screen transitions to an opposite "room" full of red velvet, in a dark red leather chair sits Lull Songstra in a golden track suit.*
Lull: TAKE NOTHING TO HEART MY FRIEND, THEY ARE JUST JEALOUS... AND BECAUSE OF THAT THEY ARE OVER ZEALOUS!
*Tim looks up and nods, tossing the magazine aside, as he takes off and hands his glasses to a random servant standing nearby, who simply puts them away in a case, as Cruis looks back over at Lull.*
Tim: I don't how you do that Lull... you always seems to know just what to sing.
Lull: THAT'S WHY I'M THE MASTER OF BROADWAY! I'M FAR MORE LEGENDARY THEN TIM HADAWAY!
*Lull reaches over and stirs in some honey into a golden cup full of tea. He looks back at his partner.*
Lull: Do you know what Zed is up to? He said to be in here by two... And that's just what we are do.........ing.
*Cruis looks up, basically shrugging as he lays back in his chair, looking back at Songstra as he does.*
Tim: You know Zed... probably busy trying to get us some sweet connections. I don't see any harm in that, after all... he is the guy who landed me that juicy eight figure contract.
Lull: Doubt in him, I do not. I can not so easily shun a man so heavily sought.
Tim: Yeah, same here. Besides, I'm sure he won't keep us waiting all day. He's probably just busy talking to that Zoomi guy.
Lull: I really can't stand all these terrible names of opponents here in EWT! Good thing we are here to raise the standard.
Tim: Oh yeah... such stupid names for such stupid people. I mean, for starters... there's some guy called Mullsturm walking around. Who in their right mind would name somebody that?!
Lull: Or did you hear of that guy named Spaz? If I were him, I would never show my face in public.
Tim: How bout this... Redface fellow. Yeah, appropriate name there. I'd be red in the face too with a name like that too.
Lull: Or even that Jobby guy. Did you check out his threads? What a clown.
Tim: Speaking of Clowns... what about this... "The Comedian?" I mean how am I supposed to tell him apart from other comedians? Not that I'd really bother...
Lull: Bah. Everyone knows that stand up is the lowest form of entertainment. And this guy can't even do that right.
Tim: I wouldn't know... I've never watched any of his dreck.
Lull: *recovering* Neither....have....I...
Tim: If that's not bad enough... I've also heard there's two guys named... Zuchinni... and Baboon.
Lull: Surely you jest, my friend!
Tim: I wish I was...
Lull: Good goodness.
*Tim holds a hand over his face as he sighs, shaking his head.*
Tim: Well, what do you expect from such a shoddy business like this one? It's a good thing we're here... not that anybody deserves to see us here in such a rinky dink operation. They should be counting their blessing we even agreed to join the EWP!
Lull: Counting? They should be bowing at our feet!
Tim: Even better!
*Suddenly, Pine bursts in, wearing his usual attire, another of his trademark grins on his face as he walks over to the two, looking at them both.*
Pine: Guys... you're not gonna fathom this, but I just landed CAP one of the juiciest little deals in my entire career. You see, I talked with some of the EWT suits, greased the wheels a little, and landed you guys, not only a spot in this TLC Battle Royal doo dad, but this coming week, CAP will make their debut in a SPECIAL MAIN EVENT MATCH! I've already lined up your opponents and everything, all you kids have to worry for is getting into the ring and crushing em like clams!
Lull: THIS IS WHY YOU ARE THE GREATEST, ZED!
*Zed chuckles a bit, reaching and patting Lull on the back.*
Pine: Yep... and don't you forget it boobie!
Lull: That, I can't not do.
*A thought comes to Lull.*
Lull: Who are we versing?
*Pine looks back at Lull, simply folding his arms as he does so.*
Well for starters... I set Mella up against some woman named Lullabelle Hell, a nice viable contender for herself, but nothing she shouldn't be able to handle. Of course, she's off shooting that soap of hers, so I'll tell her when she gets back.
Lull: Her name is quite foolish. I imagine her countenance is quite ghoulish!
Pine: As for you two... well, I figured we should go with one of these... tagging team deals I hear so much about for now, so I've paired you guys up to take on a pair known simply as... the Decapitator Brothers. Again, another threatening pair, but you boys will trounce em easily into the dust.
Cruis: Of course... as if there would be doubt of that.
Lull: After all, if these tage team matches depend on friendship as much as they say... Then we got this down better than... HEY, What's that Rumble thing about? And what are we ordering for dinner? I want the trout.
*Cruis looks over, simply laughing as he reaches into his pocket, grabbing a cell phone, then handing it to a servant standing nearby.*
Cruis: Hey you... get the caterers out here, the usual spread. I am not eating any of the garbage they've got here.
Lull: And how. Did you see that mountain shoving all that trash down...that one man, Bad? You couldn't even fit him in a double wide cab... Just sad.
Cruis: I don't think we can classify it as a man... I'd say, Walking Garbage Dump, is more accurate
Lull: As always, you are a master of oratory.
Cruis: Of course that bad guy... man, he's nothing compared to those zombies I saw walking around backstage.
Lull: And I thought Halloween only came once a year...
Cruis: What do you expect from a company where some other nobody walks around looking like a... stupid bird thing.
Lull: And there were two of them at one time!
Cruis: Good grief... what incompetence. Next thing you know... there'll be a Swedish guy or something in this company.
Lull: Or worse, some sort of pirate rip off from those Disney movies. You know, the ones that you declined to be in!
Cruis: Oh yeah, I remember that. How dare they think I'd star in some stupid kidy move like that. That's such a waste of my talents.
Lull: The gall of them, indeed!
Cruis; Reminds me of that time they also... tried to hire you to sing some jingle for a crappy product. Forgot what it was...
Lull: That other Disney movie... Junior High School Theatre or something. Terrible. No wonder it bombed.
Cruis: Bombed... that's too kind, the thing was like a nuke going off.
Lull: Glad I avoided that!
Lull: Speaking of HORRIBLE talents what about that Toro guy?
Cruis: Who?
*We fade to commercial before anything else can be heard.*
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cory16154
Team Rocket
Lets Go Pens
Posts: 848
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Post by cory16154 on May 9, 2007 17:05:24 GMT -5
peter signs then laughs wickedly
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Indigocrates
Unicron
I got bored. Decided to become a philosopher. Just 'cause.
Posts: 2,953
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Post by Indigocrates on May 9, 2007 17:42:58 GMT -5
*The sign up sheet is in camera view, already with a lot of names. Suddenly, Christopher Indigo slowly walks into view, bandaged up, with a less than warm welcome from the audience.*
Indigo: "Perhaps a chance to redeem myself in the eyes of BB."
*Indigo signs up and leaves.*
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Post by The Midnight Mystery on May 9, 2007 18:47:11 GMT -5
*Currently in the ring are Kerry von Erich and the Midnight Mystery. The two are about 7 feet away from one another, and the referee rings the bell, signifying that the match is under way.*
*Von Erich rushes at the Mystery, hammering away with lefts and rights to the chest, hoping to make the big man falter a little bit—albeit, to no effect. His eyes dart back and forth, realizing he had expended his energy the wrong way. Quickly he runs into the ropes and bounces off, aiming to hit a shoulder block. However, has he runs into the Mystery, the shoulder block does nothing but making him fall. Again he tries it on the big man, with the same results as before. He gets up, the Midnight Mystery completely indifferent towards him at the moment and staring blankly. Kerry once again runs into the ropes, coming off for a clothesline, but as soon as he is within arm’s reach of Midnight, is instantly grabbed and given a black hole slam. The big guy covers him.*
1!
2!
KICKOUT.
*Kerry gets a shoulder up, but is picked up and set back on his feet by the Mystery—only to be nailed with a booming shoulder chop, making him wince from the impact. Another shoulder chop from the Mystery, and then an arm wringer. Twisting his arm like a rope, Midnight lifts the arm up and wrenches again, almost like snapping a skinny toothpick; Kerry screaming in pain all the while. With von Erich in a bad predicament, the Midnight Mystery headbutts him, sending him in reeling. Following this, wrapping one of his massive paws around the throat of Kerry, Midnight lifts him up and chokeslams him, dropping him down to the mat. He covers yet again.*
1!
2!
KICKOUT.
*Getting tired of this, Midnight Mystery once again picks up Kerry von Erich, standing him up and then lifting him in a scoop slam position. Running, he drops him on his head—a perfect utilization of his finisher, Midnight Madness. The Mystery covers Kerry once more.*
1!
2!
3!
DING DING DING!
Finkel: Here is your winner….the MIDNIGHT…MYSTERY!
*The Mystery steps over the top rope and steps onto the floor, walking up the ramp as the fans lightly boo him. Upon reaching the stage, he throws his arms up and gives off a booming “BLLAAAAAZIIAAAAZIIIAAAAZIAAAKI!” before exiting behind the stage curtain. The camera fades out.*
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Sajoa Moe
Patti Mayonnaise
Did you get that thing I sent ya?
A man without gimmick.
Posts: 39,683
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Post by Sajoa Moe on May 9, 2007 19:01:46 GMT -5
Sean Mooney: Hello everyone, I'm Sean Mooney, and welcome to a special EWT Home Video presentation. As most of you remember, Rick Raskall and Marcus Trunk duked it out in a Steel Cage match at Crap-A-Mania IV. But what you may not have seen was the matches that took place shortly before Crap-A-Mania, as Rick Raskall and Marcus Trunk both competed in singles competition. Let's take you now to a contest featuring Rick Raskall vs. Kamala.
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Joining the match in progress, Rick Raskall is down on the mat, as Kamala rubs his belly and dances.
Gorilla Monsoon: Rick Raskall looking worse for wear as Kamala takes him down!
Bobby "The Brain" Heenan: Is that fat slob hungry again? Sorry fatty, I'm all out of fried chicken!
Monsoon: Will you stop!
Kamala scoops up Raskall and slams him down. He dances and rubs his belly again, and then goes off the ropes for a big splash!
Monsoon: Kamala setting him up! Here it comes!
But Raskall rolls out of the way just in time!
Monsoon: Kamala took too much time and now he's paying the price!
Raskall drops a leg across the back of the prone Kamala's head. He drops another leg, then goes off the ropes and performs a flipping senton onto the Ugandan Giant's back. Kamala struggles to his feet, as Raskall nails him with a dropkick, which staggers him. He goes off the ropes again, ducks a clothesline, then goes behind Kamala and hops up onto his shoulders, locking in the Whole Damn Nelson!
Monsoon: Raskall locking in that submission maneuver! Can he get the big man to quit?
Heenan: Kamala can't take the punishment! It's all over!
The referee checks on Kamala, who's nodding his head, and calls for the bell.
Mike McGuirk: Here is your winner, Rick Raskall!
Monsoon: That is some kind of maneuver there, Brain!
Heenan: I can't wait to see him lock that on Marcus Trunk soon! He's gonna be crying for his mother!
Monsoon: But can he even get the hold on big Marcus Trunk? He's even larger than Kamala! He's got those massive shoulders!
Heenan: Rick Raskall isn't afraid!
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Sean Mooney: Meanwhile, Marcus Trunk had bigger fish to fry in his match, as he took on the 7'4", 550-pound Andre the Giant.
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Andre has just entered the ring, as he towers over Marcus Trunk. Trunk's look of determination does not fade.
Vince McMahon: Look at the determination on the face of Marcus Trunk! This guy is not backing down to the challenge of the Giant!
Rowdy Roddy Piper: You can say that again, McMahon! He knows that he has the strength and the ability to hack the Giant down to size!
Andre starts off by taking a swing at Trunk, who ducks and starts punching away at Andre's midsection. But Andre simply pushes Trunk away.
McMahon: Andre absorbing those blows, one by one.
Piper: It's like he don't even feel 'em! Go for the legs, Trunk!
Trunk comes back and tackles Andre around the midsection, but the Giant still will not leave his feet. Andre clubs Trunk in the back, then whips him to the corner. He then clubs him on the head, then turns around and crushes Trunk between the turnbuckle and his massive frame.
Piper: Trunk's gettin' mauled out there!
Andre raises his arm and laughs, as the crowd boos him. He then ambles towards the corner as fast as he can, but Trunk steps out of the way, with Andre barreling into the turnbuckle. Trunk quickly takes advantage by plowing his shoulder into Andre's back, as Andre's howls out in pain.
McMahon: Trunk targeting that bad back of Andre! This might be the opening he's been looking for!
Piper: Trunk's swinging the match in his favor!
Trunk backs up to the opposite turnbuckle, then charges at Andre. But Andre raises his big boot, which stops Trunk in his tracks. While Trunk is vulnerable, Andre takes the opportunity to lock a bearhug on Trunk.
Piper: Oh no, not the bearhug! This one's gonna be over!
McMahon: It may very well be! It's very difficult to escape that maneuver when a 500-plus-pound man has you trapped in it!
Trunk tries to fight out of the hold as best he can, but Andre clenches the hold in tighter, wearing on Trunk's back.
Piper: Come on Trunk, fight it!
Finally, Trunk manages to unleash a headbutt to Andre's skull, dizzying the Giant and forcing him to release the hold. But Trunk is badly worn out after the bearhug, and is open to a clothesline from Andre. Andre raises his arm and flexes it.
McMahon: Oh no! Looks like it's time for that big elbow!
Piper: Look out Trunk! Look out!
Andre drops his big elbow, but Trunk rolls out of the way! Trunk takes a moment to recover as Andre clutches his elbow in pain. As Andre struggles to his feet, Trunk lays into his head with punches. Andre makes it back to his feet, rears back, and throws a hard punch. But Trunk ducks it, and uses the momentum to scoop Andre off his feet! The Giant has been lifted!
McMahon: Good God! Marcus Trunk has Andre off his feet, and...
Trunk takes a few steps forward, and manages to drop Andre with a running powerslam!
McMahon: POWERSLAMMED DOWN! THIS SHOULD BE IT!
1...
2...
...3!
Piper: He did it!
Howard Finkel: Here is your winner...Marcus Trunk!!
Trunk gets to his feet, clutching his back in pain after slamming the Giant. The referee raises the weary arm of the winner, as Trunk raises his fist in victory as he trudges towards the back.
McMahon: What an incredible victory for Marcus Trunk! And his momentum keeps on building!
Piper: At this rate, it looks like no man will be able to beat Trunk now! He's just slammed Andre the Giant!
*****************************************************
Sean Mooney: Thank you for watching this EWT Home Video exclusive presentation. Remember to keep buying more useless crap from EWT Home Video and EWT Shop Area. I'm Sean Mooney, and once again, thanks for watching.
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Post by raftshack on May 10, 2007 3:40:20 GMT -5
As we return from commercial, we see a pair of legs moving closer and closer to the the sign up sheet, a bare foot with a pen clenched between a pair of toes leaning over to the sheet and scribbling the name, Zeleke across a section, the pen dropping as Zeleke springs back up on both feet, grinning rather... manically at the sheet, as he whistles, suddenly... his tag team partner, Faboon, charges wildly, crashing into the wall next to it, walking back over and reaching into a pocket, pulling out a rubber stamp shaped like, his name of course, and slamming it right next to Zeleke's own, as he then simply tosses the stamp away into the nearest trash can, before they look at each other, waving their fingers at one another, before the two skip away to prepare for their upcoming tag rematch with the British Bulldogs.
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Post by pta on May 10, 2007 6:10:44 GMT -5
As we return from commercial, we see Chief Jay Strongbow standing by in the ring, looking quite confident... as he paces a bit in place, awaiting his opponent, not having to wait long as Pomp and Circumstance starts up, Tyreese strutting confidently out from the back, arms folded behind his back, as he looks at the ring, not threatened at all. The bell sounds to signal this opening contest. Announcer: The following contest is scheduled for one fall! Introducing first, approaching the ring, now residing in Dover Delaware, weighing in at 226 pounds, Tutor Tyreese! Tyreese simply steps into the ring, getting into a wrestling stance, as he looks back at his opponent on the other side, simply waiting it seems. Announcer: And now residing in Georgia, weighing in at 265 pounds... Chief Jay Strongbow! Strongbow does a War Dance of sorts, as he looks back at Tyreese, the bell sounding. Tyreese charges in instantly, grabbing and wrenching an arm of his opponent, holding it and hitting a few shoulder breakers, as he smiles quite proudly, quickly switching to a standing armbar, as Strongbow struggles to fight out, Tyreese quickly sending him off the ropes, catching him with a hip-toss, following with a leg drop across this same arm, as Strongbow grasps the area slightly. Tyreese holds onto the arm, doing a handstand of sorts, driving a pair of knees into the same area a few times, before grabbing hold again, dropping down and applying a Cross Armbreaker. Jay groans, trying to pull his arm free, but Tyreese keeps quite the vice on, applying pressure and trying to yank this arm right out of the socket, Strongbow eventually leaning over and punching his way free, as Tyreese lets go, groaning a bit. He rises to his feet, as Jay hits some knife edge chops, sending Tyreese reeling, as he grabs and hits him standing knee lifts to the gut, hunching the tutor over, as he finishes after three, taking him down to the mat! He walks over, grabbing and stomping into a leg, as he tries to soften Tyreese up for his Indian Deathlock. Tyreese however kicks his way free, scrambling to his feet and looking quite annoyed, as he starts circling, Strongbow doing so as well, the two lunging out in the center, as Tyreese swings behind into a waistlock, Strongbow quickly swinging back around, taking Tyreese down with a Backdrop Suplex! Tyreese groans, slowly rising up, as Strongbow grabs him again, following up with a Vertical Suplex! Tyreese begins grasping slightly at the back, as he rises up again, Strongbow going for a standing Tomahawk Chop, which Tyreese quickly sidesteps, catching his opponent's arm and wrenching it again, pulling Strongbow right into a Jumping Armbreaker! Strongbow gasps in pain, once again nursing the area, Tyreese quickly switching right into a simple Fujiwara Armbar, tweaking the area, Strongbow trying to escape and get to the bottom rope, but Tyreese holds on tight, giving his opponent nowhere to go. Eventually he gives up with a quick tap out. Announcer: Here is your winner by submission... Tutor Tyreese! Tyreese gets up, letting go and walking over, snatching the microphone from the announcer rather quickly, as he looks around the crowd, for some reason, not at all in a good mood. Tyreese: Gimme dat! Now... in case ya cretins hadn't noticed lately, I WAS LEFT OFF CRAPMANIA!!!! Yeah, dat's right and I'm quite riled up. How dare dat patetic excuse for an EWT commisionah or whatever he's supposed to be, Toomi, leave the greatest pure wrestler in de history of this entire business! He probably figured that my style of wrestling was too... old fashioned and... boring. Well let me tell you right now, dat ain't true a damn bit! I'm way better den everybody whose evah thrown hands or flopped off de top rope like a total idiot! I'm telling each and everyone of ya... that I am de greatest thing in this whole fleabitten company and I am sick of not gettin de recognition dat I so rightly deserve! Dat's why I decided to skip off from de unasumement park known as Sesame Place, after I lost unfairly to dat lummox Trunk and after I was told to go home since I wasn't gonna be involved with Crapmania. Some might call that unprofessional, but dose same people are completely imbeciles who don't know a damn thing about what dey are talking about! The crowd boos angrily, now chanting "SHUT THE HELL UP!", which just serves to tick Tyreese over further as he ruffles his brow, running a hand through his air, continuing still. Tyreese: Dis is exactly what I expect from you uneducated buffoons! Insulting me, just because you know what I say is right. Shooting me down because ya know dat my words are true and everything that you say is nothing but pure garbage spewing out of those lips of yours. You see, there's gonna be a few changes concerning the EWT and how Tutor Tyreese is concerned, there is gonna be a bit of repercussions for each one of dose people backstage that drove my sorry career into the sad state it is today! I swear right now... dat very soon, de name Tutor Tyreese will by synonymous with... Suddenly, the lights go off, almost instantly, as a familiar tune picks up on the Toomitron... The crowd collectively gasps as they see the specter known as Ferhago Crow appear behind Tyreese. They then start to cheer for the ghostly pirate, as if to say “thanks for shutting him up”. The Jamaican Tutor, fully knowing the game, turns to face Crow with little delay. He readies himself into a wrestling stance while looking none too impressed with Crow. After a brief stare down, Crow makes the first move with a punch. Only for Tyreese to quickly wrap his arm around the offending arm of Crow. Tyreese wastes no time in driving Crow to his knees by dragging him down. Upon hearing the crowd cheering for Crow, Tyreese grits his teeth before landing hard elbow strikes to the shoulder. But Crow is beginning to rise as if he is unaffected by the pain inflicted by Tyreese. While the dark figure rises, Tyreese locks both legs and arms around the arm in order to hold Crow down. To the audience's dismay, it's actually working. The maneuver has forced Crow back down to his knees which causes Tyreese's back to rest on the mat as he really grinds it in. Tyreese appears to be enjoying the fact that his words are being proven to the world. Now nobody will doubt him... How could they when he has taken out the newly arrived Crow? Yet these thoughts disappear as he is lifted in the air with the raw strength of Crow, while still holding on to the arm, and is slammed hard back down to the mat. The force of the impact causes Tyreese to release the hold as he tries to recover from the slam. But before he even receives a second of freedom Crow is there standing above him. The audience cheers loudly as Tyreese realizes that he just maybe in trouble with this mountain of a man. He begins to desperately kick Crow to keep him away. His once proud face now is covered in fear. Yet Crow keeps coming. Tyreese kicks Crow one last time in the stomach before rising, hoping that the shot will enable him to get another submission in. But as he makes it to his feet he is quickly lifted into a Suplex position by Crow. The crowd cheers wildly. And then is prompted dropped on his head & neck. The crowd falls deathly silent. Even they know that a fall at the angle that Tyreese landed is no good. Crow inhumanely pushes the limp body of his victim closer to the nearest turnbuckle. He then ascends the top rope. In an amazing feat, Crow leaps high into the air while doing what looks like a Shooting Star Press. But as he lands his knees crash into the head of Tyreese. The crowd gasps out in shock. Some of the children in the audience are booing Crow now. Chants of “That's enough!” now spread throughout the arena. Yet still, Crow does not look done yet. He rolls out of the ring and walks over to the steel stairs. He picks up the top section and throws it recklessly at the announcer table. Luckily there are currently no announcers present at this time. He then lifts the bottom section of the stairs and throws it into the ring carelessly. It lands with a thud next to Tyreese, who doesn't stir. He re-enters the ring then sets up the stairs on their original position. The cold eyes of Crow drifts back to the fallen Tyreese. In slow & deliberate steps he makes it over to his victim who he then drags back to the stairs. The crowd that once hungered for Tyreese's comeuppance now cries for his torment to end. Oblivious to the statements against him, Crow lifts up the unconscious Tyreese into a Standing Headscissors on top of the stairs. The frightening specter crosses his arms as he cuts his throat with both thumbs. In a flash, Crow leaps up and hits his dangerous finisher on the stairs. The audience shudders as the sound of Tyreese's head smashing into the stairs reaches their ears. Ferhago Crow stands to a chorus of boos and open weeping for Tyreese. Undaunted, he rolls the limp body of Tyreese off the stairs and on to the mat. In doing so, everyone sees the blood of Tyreese flow from a sick wound on his forehead. The Cursed One recrosses Tyreese's arms and takes in the sight of the horrified looks of the crowd. He then places his boot upon the crossed arms. The lights flicker before completely blacking out. When they rise, Crow is long gone but the remains of the Tutor lay in the ring. Almost immediately, a group of referees and EWT officials charge out from the back, looking on in deep concern at the young man, as they signal to the back, calling for a stretcher, a group of paramedics marching out with one, as they quickly load the unconscious Tyreese onto it, carefully exiting and carry him to the back. We then cut to an image of Principal Pain watching in the back, arms folded as he simply shakes his head, looking... disappointed at his protege. The man turns around, walking away from the monitor as we cut to commercial
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on May 10, 2007 20:32:38 GMT -5
*Back from commercial, the camera opens on the Wrestle Posse. Axel looks down while top of Jobby's head and eyes are covered with yellow gauze. Axel breaks the silence.*
Axel: ....So... While you were getting checked on, I went to see Ultimo..... It's no good. I guess we should consider this a blessing, but I don't.
Jobby: Who said that?
Axel: So much for feelings... You do know you DON'T have to cover your eyes, right?
Jobby: But then I'll see the zombies again!
Axel: ....No more R rated movies for you.
*Suddenly, there is a knocking on the door.*
Thunder: If you don't open this door in...FIIIFFFFTEEEEEEEEEEN SECONDS...I'm kicking this thing down!
Jobby: Who said that?! Is that you, Chunk?!
Axel: Ugh... It's bad enough that we lost a match and locker room member... Why do we have to deal with your pompous asses?
Jupiter: Hey! We're the ones trying to be nice here for a change!
Axel: I'm sure.
Jobby: IS THAT THE PIZZA BOY?!
Thunder: And we're not pompous...we're confident!
Axel: And a pair of drunks.
Jupiter: What do you have against the indulgence in fine alcoholic beverages?
Thunder: Yeah, and someone as pissed as you, Assel--er, I mean, Axel...you could use some!
Axel: *chuckles* See, you fools are in it so bad that you lose the ability to think clearly. Any chance that you had of convincing me this was a peaceful mission is shot now. So much for the self proclaimed intelligence of TJT.
Jobby: ARE THEY GUESTS?! I'M GETTING THE DOOR!
*Jobby enters the closet.*
Jupiter: Thunder, why do you have to ruin every plan we--
Jobby: HELLO?!
Axel: I'm surrounded by idiots....
Thunder: HELLO?!
Jupiter: Jim, let me handle--
Terina: Are you going to open the door? We're not here to stand outside. Now could you please let us in...before Jim decides to start shouting like he's crazy?
Axel: ...Why should I?
Terina: Now, we didn't come here to pick a fight. Rather, we just wanted to let you know, that if you ever need any help with anything...you can count on us.
Axel: *Sarcastically* For a hard bottle of your finest liquor, right?
Jupiter: You know the saying..."A friend in need, is a friend indeed?" Well, that's not our point. In fact, the very merit of that saying is slim to nill...
Axel: I'm not fooled by cliches.
Jobby: THIS IS THE CLOSET!
Jupiter: Cliches? Cliches? No my good man, we're here to discuss...things...
Thunder: The closet? THE CLOSET?
Axel: We can do so through the door. The closet, as in what you're still in Thunder.
Thunder: No dude. No...just...no. I've had more busy nights with classy ladies than you, Jobby, and, well, everyone NOT in TJT combined.
Terina: Listen! Axel...open the door. This is really getting awkward out here.
Jupiter: What do they think when they see two men and a woman yelling to someone inside?
Axel: That you aren't as classy as you portray yourself as?
Jobby: I'M GETTING THE DOOR!!
Axel: ...Jobby, the door is more to your *crash*.....Ugh.....FINE! I'll get the damn thing.
Jupiter: Impossible. We're just damn classy people. We're always cutting deals with the highest level businessmen in the country. What have YOU done--
Terina: Shhhh! Let's be civil here. You two are better than this!
Jupiter: Not after two bottles of Scotch, I'm not.
*Axel opens the door, without any sort of defense as he stares at the three members.*
Axel: I figure that after dealing with the Draugr, you three pale in comparison. I figure nothing you can do can bother me as much as they have.
*He turns his back to them and enters back into the room to sit on a bench in the room. As he sits down, he can't help but stare at Jobby who is covered in their clothes.*
Thunder: Pale in comparison? Isn't that sort of ironic, especially comparing us to a pack of chalky spazzes like them?
Axel: Congrats, you have a least one functioning brain cell.
Thunder: I'm really not that dull...but drinking does that to you.
Terina: Guys--
Jupiter: I have a little more control, thankfully...
Axel: WAS THERE A POINT TO THIS JOYOUS VISIT?!
Terina: GUYS!
*Everyone goes silent.*
Terina: Thank you. *smiles* Now, what I was getting to, is that you guys don't seem to be the...er...most popular guys here. Ask the Draugr.
Axel: Nothing new for me. But you're wrong about him. *pointing at Jobby.* He's more over than most of the EWT roster, INCLUDING YOU... For some strange reason...
Jobby: WHO SAID THE DRAUGR?! I'M HIDING!
Axel: ....
Terina: I meant in the locker room, Ax. Of course you guys are well liked. You're just...
Jupiter: ...er...
Terina: ...fun, athletic guys...that some people take the wrong way. Like we did.
Axel: Unlike the new coming group of actors, you guys aren't convincing at all. *He rises and stares right into her eyes.* I'm not so new to the dance either. I'm not falling for the ole fake out again.
Terina: What do we have to prove to you?!
Jupiter: We've turned over a new leaf!
Axel: *pointing at his still fresh scar* Alot.
Terina: Ugh, I should have known...you guys aren't going to believe us, are you?
Axel: Why should I?
Thunder: Maybe we should prove to you two we really do mean well. Hrrrmmmm...
Terina: What do you have to lose? To continue to be assaulted by those vanilla savages?
Axel: I'm sure you are REALLY concerned for our safety.
Jupiter: You're testing my patience here.
Thunder: Not like you'd think, Ax...
Terina: So someone means well...and you turn them down like this? But judging by the way you can't even deal with a lady in a relationship, I shouldn't be surprised... *rolls eyes*
Axel: I see no lady here.
Terina: No lady? EXCUSE ME?
Jobby: WHO'S THERE?! IS THAT YOU, TIFFANY?! I'M A BIG FAN!
Axel: What he said.
Jobby: You like Tiffany too!?!
Axel: ....Sure, whatever.
*Axel points to the door.*
Axel: Do what you please, but keep me out of your "thoughts".
Terina: Cute. I meant a certain Juri Sada--
Axel: And I guess you aren't as virginal as I thought, little missy.
Terina: And what do you mean by that?
Axel: Even the suggesting that I may like you disgusts me to no end. And your pathetic attempts at peace fail. I'm really hoping that Washington doesn't use people like you. Somehow insults don't bode well for diplomacy.
Jupiter: This coming from a man who's trying to force us out of his lockerroom. Of course we're not going to be perfect if you continue to mistreat us!
Axel: Again, why should I?
Thunder: Well, we mean well. We're not in this for our own.
Jobby: I FORGIVE YOU, TJT!
Axel: You can't mean that!
Jupiter: Thank God someone's seeing the light.
Jobby: I CAN'T SEE AT ALL!
Axel: ....You are blind in more ways than one.
Jupiter: Blind maybe...but this man knows a good group of people when he hears them. And he hears us.
Terina: Please, now, let's get back to our offer here.
Thunder: The small talk isn't helping things. You guys want our help in keeping those guys off your backs or not?
Axel: We can handle ourselves just fine.
Terina: The damage you've sustained is perfect evidence of this. It's a numbers game. They've got it stacked against you.
Axel: Something that you know a lot about, right?
Thunder: Whoa whoa, pal, we don't mess with this lady...keep it in class, Ax.
Axel: What?
Jobby: ARE WE WATCHING A BAD MOVIE LIKE WHEN SHE WAS BAD?!
Jupiter: What?
Axel: ...I meant that you gang up on people, you perverted freak.... *to Terina* You REALLY support this goof?
Terina: Well let me put it this way...like I said, we've got no problem with you. Juri trusted us, and look how many times we've teamed up on her. How many times, Jason?
*Jason pulls out a pad.*
Jupiter: The amount of times...is...zero.
*He puts pad away.*
Terina: We reconciled with her...
Axel: *snorts* You've teamed up with her zero times and that proves a point, how?!
Terina: Um...remember the teaming known as JTS? If we were so bad, would we form a benign team?
Thunder: Yup, nothing bad about us there. We don't have to be a team, per se, but we need to form a truce.
Axel: A truce, huh? *pause* What will you give me if you break such a truce?
Thunder: What do we have we could give you...how about some cold hard cash, for starters?
Axel: Not personal enough. You're going to have do harder than that.
Jupiter: Well, how about this...what would you want from us?
Axel: Something to PROVE you are committed...
*Axel points at Thunder.*
Axel: Give me his car.
*Thunder produces a paper from out of nowhere and he reads it.*
Thunder: "...and it is hereby established that in this insurance contract, that not for five years after a purchase is made that this custom jaguar XJ may it be moved between owners..." Sorry Ax, but you're going to have to wait a LONG time if you want that vehicle. Even if I gave it to you, you'd have to wait five years before you can legally obtain it.
Axel: Guess you really aren't committed to this truce, huh? That's fine with me.
Thunder: Dude, I told you...that contract states that if I gave it to you tomorrow, with the proceedings, you'd have to wait five years before you get it. But how about something not so long term?
Axel: I'm all ears.
Jupiter: Well, what sounds good besides the car?
Terina: Yeah! We're willing to go to great lengths to uphold our end of things. *flashes a toothy grin*
Axel: *pointing at Terina while he lifts his shades* Your contract.
Terina: WHAT?
Thunder: WHAT?
Jupiter: WHAT?
Axel: *He lowers them then looks to the side* But if you aren't interested, then..
Thunder: NO! WE ARE INTERESTED!
Axel: Alright then. In the event of you guys breaking the Truce, we get Terina's contract
Jupiter: For..for...how long?
Axel: ...Hmm... I couldn't stand her around me for more than a month, so a month. And to make it fair to you, here's our half of the bargain... If we break it, we'll quit.
Terina: Are there...any specifics to the...part that applies to me?
Axel: We have COMPLETE say so in what you do for that month.
*He notices her twitching.*
Terina: What...uh...would you want my contract for anyway...?
Axel: To keep us protected. You have turned over a new leaf, right?
Terina: How—how--how? How could I protect you?
Axel: I seriously doubt you want to be a servant to that. *he points at Jobby.*
Jobby: Don't point at people!
Axel: *He looks over at Jobby blankly* Besides, if you truly have changed... Why should you concern yourself with a clause to you breaking said contract?
Terina: I'm just...curious...why you're so interested in me in particular? How could I keep you protected?
Axel: Again. Do you REALLY want ME to control your every action?
Terina: ...no...
Axel: Then everything should be fine then with those two clauses as deterrents. *He offers his hand to Jupiter.* Considering you are the most sane of the three of you, I return your truce... And will fully accept it once it is in writing.
Jupiter: Well--
*Jason notices Thunder looking intense and Terina looking as though almost saying "NO" but, Jupiter looks back at Axel who has a sneer on his face.*
Jupiter: --it's a--
*Jack Jupiter comes in.*
Jack: Guys! Where were you?!
*TJT all look about, embarrassed by his sudden entrance.*
Jason: This doesn't concern you!
Jack: Why not?
Axel: I feel sorry for you, Jason... I really do. Sharing blood with that.
Jack: Hey, what's so bad about me? I'm a classic guy!
*Thunder sighs as Terina shakes her head.*
Jobby: Jack isn't classic, he's rusty!
Axel: Having your eyes covered doesn't make you stupid or deaf!
Jupiter: Or does it?
Jack: Jason, what's this contract thing about?
Jason: Erm--
Axel: What? You don't have the balls to come right out and tell him? This contract thing basically says that Terina will be property of the WP for a month.
Jack: What? Oh come on! This ain't fair!
Terina: Seriously!
Jack: Yeah, if anyone should get that contract--
Terina: ...
Axel: HA!
Jobby: *lifting his bandages* You're pathetic.
*Axel attempts to stifle some hard laughter.*
Terina: Please. I don't even want to think about what he'd do with it.
Jack: Now come on, I'm a good guy! And my ideas aren't that bad!
Thunder: Yeah, nobody could drive a woman like you away from doing something like.....him.....uh oh.
Jupiter*whispering to Jimmy*: Jim, shut up! Don't give them ideas!
Axel: It seems that, Terina, you are resting with a pack of wolves. Whereas I could really care less about you.
Terina: Jim and Jason are great guys.
Jack: Whatabout me? Whatabout THE REEEEAAAAL Jack Jupiter?
Axel: Okay, in the contract, he gets banned from the building too.
Jack: HEY!
Terina: Now the contract sounds like a reason to do anything to break it.
Jason: Make it imposing!
Thunder: Yeah! We'll prove it to ya!
Axel: Alright... Alright...I got a better idea... If you break the truce... *He looks at Jack.* He gets Terina for a month.
Thunder: WHAT?!
Jupiter: WHAT?!
Terina: OH GOD NO!
Jack: YYYYYYEEEEEEEESSSSSSSSSSS!
Axel: *To Terina* I think that even you'll admit you'd rather be our servant than his... However it is too late for that. Now, if you agree to those terms, I will trust you three completely. So truce? *His face looking decidedly sinister.*
Terina: Um....sure... *she smiles very sheepishly*
Jason: You have a deal *shakes Axel's hand*.
Axel: I'll be expecting the papers soon.
Jason: Certainly.
Thunder: I got an idea, guys.
Jobby: YES?!
Thunder: You know, as a gesture of good faith, maybe we could hang out. TJT can show you the nightlife. And as the man who drives that damned car of mine...I swear I'll show you two the nightlife with me, Jupiter and Terina. If you want.
Jupiter: Actually, yes, that sounds good. A bit of a contractual deposit, if you will...
*At the same time...*
Axel: No thanks, I rather like being coherent.
Jobby: I'LL BE HAPPY TOO!
Axel: You heard him. Have fun, you kids.
Jupiter: So you, Jobby...you want to come with us?
Jobby: *He throws the bandages off* Sounds AWESOME!
Terina: Alright, then it's settled. We'll see you later, guys. Oh and Jobby--we'll see you in another day or two--and I think you'll like just how TJT can make good on a deal. *She smugly grins as she turns around.* Let's go boys. Time to get out of this second rate arena and visit the heart of the city...*Thunder and Jason Jupiter pull up on opposite sides of her and the three walk out. Jack shrugs and walks out too, shutting the door. Axel drops his grin as he glares at the door.*
Jobby: *Momentarily dropping his blissful ignorance* Something wrong?
Axel: *Pushing his shades up by his middle finger* Yeah... I don't trust them one bit...
*The camera fades out.*
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Post by liontamer12 on May 10, 2007 21:27:33 GMT -5
*Camera fades in on Valentine. He pulls a pen from his polo pocket and signs the sheet. He adjusts the paper plug in his bloodied nose and sighs. He returns the pen to his pocket and it explodes, leaving black ink all over his polo and the lower half of his neck. He nods in acceptance and carrys on in the opposite direction. The camera fades.*
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Post by dorf on May 10, 2007 22:53:45 GMT -5
*Dorf is backstage all alone with a microphone, the setting is dark. A white bandage is shown around dorf's forehead from that Lighttube attack of David Davies...*
Dorf: Crap-a-Mania IV is history. Came in as a champion for the first time and knew it was going to be a hard time to retain after enduring a TLC Gauntlet match. I could've single-handedly defeated the Nyrds once again, but....*points to forehead as he comes into some kind of lighting* YOU bashed me in the forehead.
*laughs*
I thought you died Davies, died and go away....but no, you just had to comeback and ruin my shot to finally look good at Crap-a-Mania. I am sick and tired of you trying to do this s*** on me and while it has been a good two years since you tried to do anything on me, its going to end soon.
You thought it was going to end before it had been re-loaded by those Nyrds, but no...after my little bump has cleared me to return to EWT, your ASS IS MINE! BECAUSE DAVID DAVIES, YOU WILL GET YOUR....JUST DO!
As for Toomi's House Party coming June 3rd, 2007, I remember way back when on January 8, 2005. It was a Hell In A Cell match at Toomi's House...do you remember that day....DO YOU REMEMBER?!
Hell, I bet you don't remember...so I'll pop-in the DVD so that you will remember:
Classic...isn't it? That was the debut of EWTs newest Superstar, Heiden-Dorf. If it wasn't for his help and me moving away of that glass table it would have been game over for me. But no, my Dorf-Plex took effect in the match OVER THE GLASS TABLE and got me the 1....2....3.
Using your signature weapon of my classic finisher brings a tear to my left eye and I thank you for it.
*points to headbanded bloody forehead*
But this, this towel on my forehead is where this thank you, turns into me wishing you kicked out of 2 so that I could hit another Dorf-Plex onto you!
Enough of this history crap, since Toomi Bischoff is not granting matches to his belated Toomi House Party thingamajig, I am entering the TLC Rumble to give as many people the DO as much as possible....screw being the GM, giving people the DO is what I uh.....do. I hope you intend to join Davies....in fact, I'm inviting you to join as well. STEAL the show like we did over TWO YEARS AGO! Bring EWT back from its past to now....
....and like a noble JBL once said, some guy will make Tarzan his Jane....and right now, I feel as confused as the monkey himself.
*Just then, a whispering OWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!!!!!!!! blared towards a window and shocked dorf. Dorf turned all the lighting to see that nobody is there as the window is open somehow. It was gusty winds out there making that "owww" noise. dorf slams the window shut as the camera fades to coca-cola blak for commerical.*
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Post by Virus aka Captain No-Nuts on May 11, 2007 1:36:47 GMT -5
(Virus walks up to the sign up sheet and stares at it momentarily as the crowd pops for both his return and the possibility of him being in the TLC rumble at THP3. Virus then picks up the pen and the clipboard, staring at each in turn for a few more moments, before shaking his head and dropping them back into place.)
Virus: I've got other things to take care of first...
(The crowd pops again at the mention of Virus's unfinished business as he walks off-screen.)
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Post by xombiehiphop on May 11, 2007 9:06:09 GMT -5
"Money, money, money, money.."
The sounds of Money Inc's theme begins to play and the masses boo accordingly. After a few moments of waiting, The Million Dollar Man and I.R.S. have yet to make an appearance. The music dies down as some activity finally stirs. I.R.S. is being led to the ring by his red colored tie by Wraith. He's wearing the proverbial "crimson mask" and his attire is tattered and torn. The rest of The Draugr follow along down the ramp as Wraith tosses Irwin into the ring, who simply lays on his back, looking very much like a fish out of water.
Corpse and Wraith grab him by the arms and hold him into a kneeled position, keeping his head lowered. Karma slumps down in a corner of the ring, wrapping her arms around her stomach. Ghost Face, now with mic in hand, circles around the ring a few times before he begins to speak
Ghost Face: It would seem as though we have a dilemma on our hands. Mr.Schyster and his partner have both found themselves incapacitated. ..But there's someone back there who isn't..some one who's due to face one of us tonight..and that someone..is Hulk Hogan..
The crowd pop at the mention of the orange goblin
Ghost Face: You see, this particular dilemma is aimed directly towards you, Hogan. What we have in the ring is an evil man. A man who wouldn't hesitate for a second to twist a knife into your back a thousand times, if given the chance. ..So what will you do..knowing that if you come out here and save him..he'll still continue his wicked ways. ..And what will you do..if you don't save him..and we stop just short of tearing out his entrails?
A smirk never leaving his face as he tilts his head sideways
Ghost Face: ..When there's no more room in Hell, the dead will walk the Earth..so which one of you gets a taste of home tonight?
After a few moments, no sign of Hogan is seen. Ghost Face shrugs a bit before turning to face I.R.S., giving him a sinister look..
"I am a real American.."
The crowd explodes as the red and yellow legend appears on the ramp. He points towards the ring and stomps his way forward, the members of The Draugr sliding out aside from Corpse who motions for him to hurry it up. Hogan slides into the ring and receives a few boots to the back of the skull and back. The bell rings..
Hulk slowly rises, despite the pummeling he's receiving. As Hogan looks to rise to a vertical base, Corpse bounces off the ropes, planting a both of his feet into the side of his head. Hogan rolls onto his back as Corpse continues his assault, dropping onto his knee's and assaulting him with continuous right hands. Corpse backs up, allowing Hulk some breathing room as Hogan climbs to his feet, backed into a corner. Corpse rushes forward, striking him just under the chin with a Diving Knee, then pulls Hulk out with a Bulldog, all in one fluid motion.
The blue haired zombie turns his back to The Hulkster, looking skywards, chanting some kind of strange hym. Oblivious to Hogan suddenly rising to his feet, eyes full of fire. Corpse turns around to see this and nails him with a right hand. Hulk begins to shake his head and pump his fists, effectively starting to "Hulk Up". Another right hand has a similar effect. Hogan points a single finger towards The Draugr member, the audience yelling "YOU!" accordingly. Corpse backs up a step before throwing another punch which Hogan blocks. The legend responds with a right hand of his own, taking Corpse off his feet.
Hulk grabs Corpse by the back of his head and rams it into the turnbuckle a few times, stunning him. Corpse is whipped into the ropes and flung right into the big boot! Hogan cups his ears a few times before running the ropes, looking to drop his trademark Leg Drop. ..But as he gets close enough to the outside, he receives a steel chair to the back of his knee, sending him crashing to the mat. The Ref calls for the bell as Ghost Face, Wraith and Karma slide into the ring and begin to stomp away at him, bringing the chair along as well.
Once Hulk gets to his knee's, Corpse slams the chair of his head, denting it, and sending him back down. His forehead instantly becoming split upon as blood trickles forth from it. Corpse brings the blunt end of the chair across his throat, pushing it downwards until Hulk ceases his struggling. Wraith drops a leg drop of his own across his throat, mocking his finishing maneuver. Satisfied with themselves, The Draugr depart from the squared circle, leaving Hulk Hogan gasping for air, soaking in his own blood..
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Post by raftshack on May 13, 2007 0:51:34 GMT -5
We see the British Bulldogs once again standing in the ring, looking quite ready this time, as they prepare for an epic rematch against the opponents who debuted against them. The crowd is giving them a nice reaction, as suddenly the lights lower, spotlights starting to circle the ring, as lasers go off everywhere. Mooninites picks up on the Toomitron, as in a puff of smoke, a slightly sore Team Raft Shack appears atop the very Toomitron itself! They grin and hop off, wearing their usual attire, as the bell sounds to signal this next match
Announcer: The following tag team contest is scheduled for one fall! Introducing first, from Foreign Alien Island, at a combined weight of 399 pounds, Zeleke and Faboon... Team Raft-Shack!
Faboon confidently struts down the rampway, slapping his chest, as Zeleke kind of copies, only he's moonwalking and slapping his ass. The Bulldogs look quite more annoyed with these two then they did last time, as Zel and Fab hops onto the ring apron, flipping inside and running off the ropes, bouncing back and forth, back and forth, back and forth... for awhile now. The Bulldogs look even more annoyed.
Announcer: And currently in the ring, at a combined weight of 488 pounds, Davey Boy Smith and the Dynamite Kid, the British Bulldogs!
The two prep themselves as Faboon drops on one knee, stopping and waving over to the Bulldogs wildly, as Zeleke stands behind him, pumping his fist. The two team head to their respective corners, Faboon and Smith starting off for their respective teams. Faboon jumps up and down in place as Smith signals for a lock up, Faboon shrugging and accepting, as Smith quickly turns it into an Arm Wrench, driving some elbows into the arm area, as Fab looks quite annoyed, flipping out of the move, then turning it into one of his own. walking over and springing off the ropes, turning it into an Armdrag! Smith goes rolling along, getting back to his feet and charging for a clothesline, which Faboon avoids by dropping into a back handspring. He springs back to his feet, hitting some quick forearms to Smith's face, staggering him a bit, then sending him off the ropes, catching him with a dropkick! He cackles, stepping in place, as Smith rises back to his feet, Fab snapping off yet another. Smith goes back down as Faboon walks over, tagging in Zeleke. Zeleke vaults into the ring, charging and hitting a perfect Flipping Senton across the chest! He rolls back to his feet, as Faboon quickly follows up with a Flipping Senton to the same area, He too rolls back to his feet, as they both pull Smith up, pulling him up into a two man bulldog! Faboon heads out as Zeleke stays in, pulling Smith up again, sending him off the ropes, only for Davey to counter, sending Zeleke off, as he grabs at him, only for Zel to slide underneath, popping up on the other side and hitting a Lungblower! Smith groans, as Zeleke rolls out from underneath, charging off the ropes, coming back and hitting a dropkick to the side, sending Smith rolling along the mat!
Zeleke walks back over, reaching down and grabbing Smith, leaping up for a jumping neckbreaker, only for him to easily throw him, Zeleke however rolling through the move, back to his feet, coming off the ropes again, charging for a jumping crossbody! Smith however catches him, turns around and flings him away with a Fall Away Slam! He gets back to his feet, stomping over the chest of Zel, before walking over and tagging in Dynamite Kid. The Kid steps in, waiting for Zel to rise up, charging and hitting him with a clothesline! Zel gets turned inside out, groaning and rising up on all fours, the Kid coming off the ropes and hitting a jumping knee drop across the back, flattening Zeleke. He quickly pulls him up to his feet, right into a Snap Suplex! He gets back up, lifting him into another, before walking over and tagging in Smith himself. The two walk over and pull Zeleke up now, right into a Two Man Vertical Suplex now, Zeleke groaning, grasping a bit at the back. Smith walks over now, dropping an elbow into the back of Zeleke, popping up and following with a Jumping one, before turning him around and making a cover. 1....2..
Zeleke manages to kick out. Smith simply pulls him up, hoisting Zeleke up for a Scoop Slam, which Zeleke manages to escape, slipping out from behind and shoving Smith forward, charging and hitting him with a Throwback style move, planting Smith face first into the mat. He quickly starts crawling full speed, as Smith slowly rises up himself, Zeleke meanwhile tagging out! Faboon charges into the ring, hitting Smith with a Hurricane Style Clothesline, rolling back to his feet, charging and following with a Spinning Wheel kick as he manages to rise back up! He spins in place, flashing a thumbs in the middle, only to get cut off by Dynamite who comes in from behind with a clothesline to the back! Faboon groans, hunching over, as Zeleke meanwhile charges in, springing off his fallen partner, jumping and hitting a Blockbuster, taking Dynamite down! He springs back to his feet, hitting Smith as he sits up now with a Shining Wizard! Smith groans, crumpling over as Faboon rises back up, nodding approvingly, then kicking Zeleke in the face before jumping atop for the cover. 1....2....
Dynamite manages to barely make the save! Zeleke and Faboon look at each other, shaking their heads, hoisting Dynamite up, then taking him down with a smooth STO/Russian Leg Sweep combo! Dynamite groans, rolling quickly out of the ring, as the two get on each side of Smith, who starts to rise again. Zel hits a kick to the back, Faboon to the front, as they seem to be looking for the Foot Frenzy, only for them to end with the Halt Grinder, Smith getting taken down easily, as Faboon shoves Zeleke away, making the cover. 1....2....
3!!!
This short affair is more than over.
Announcer: Here are your winners... Team Raft-Shack!
Zeleke and Faboon quickly hop up, then drop down on all fours, hopping across the ring in celebration, quickly rolling out of the ring and crawling back up the rampway, as the Bulldogs come to, once again angry that they lost to these two nutcases... YET AGAIN, as we fade to the next segment.
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Post by "The Cure" Matthew Clark on May 13, 2007 20:58:48 GMT -5
Sickness. Death. Destruction.
As we fade in, we hear these words, almost in a chant. As we get closer, we see a man standing in the middle of a red star, illuminated by candles. The camera gets as close as it can before the man turns to the camera, an insane grin upon his face.
Man: Sickness. Death. Destruction. These three things run rampant across EWT, and yet no one tries to stop them. They are visible, they are apparent, and yet no one does a thing to stop it. That is, until now. For you see my children, I have taken it upon myslef to purge EWT of Sickness, Death, and Destruction. I have been chosen to cleanse EWT under my conditions. EWT is the Sickness...... and I am The Cure.
The man starts to laugh maniacally as we fade out...
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